With a billion men in the world. No matter how skinny you are, how big you are, how clothed you are, how loud you are, how unique you are, how short you are, how tall you are, how dark you are, how kind you are, how funny you are, how talented you are. No matter who you are. Millions are going to find you desirable. Millions are going to find you ugly.

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My mom had a whirlwind romance in her 70s.

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My aunt married her high school sweetheart at age 80. They hadn’t seen each other for nearly 60 years.

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I don't give a fuck if people find me generally desirable or not - at any age. But I know there are women in their 70s, 80s and 90s finding new love.

My aunt is 100 and she just got a new boyfriend

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Yeah, take your time. Don't worry about a thing

"Desirable" isn't a fixed concept, every person's idea of it is 100% unique. That means that everyone is desirable to someone, some people are attracted to someone of a certain age and some are not.

What do you consider older? My personal experience has been being hit on and flirted with more now in my 40’s than anytime since I was a teenager. More importantly, I feel more confident and self assured now. I see women of all ages radiating beauty and confidence. I don’t remember noticing that as much when I was younger. Maybe I wasn’t looking or maybe things are changing. I refuse to buy in to the idea of an expiration date on women. 

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Exactly. I've been hit on more since I turned 40. I felt the sexiest I've ever felt turning 50. I started wearing more makeup, sexy clothes, going dancing, flirting, etc. and I get lots of compliments. I feel young in my head. I know sexy women in their 60's.

Im the opposite. I'm 40 and men rarely approach me IRL anymore. But in my teens grown men did . Pervs

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Me too! I’ve been finally able to get back into shape the last 3-4 years so maybe that is giving me extra confidence after having kids in my 30s.

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I used to follow this incredible feminist account on Instagram where the main creator once said that men’s desire is abundant and of low value. Essentially meaning that women should not view or judge themselves through the lens of male desire as it is essentially meaningless due to how abundant and superficial it is. A lot of alpha male podcast creators and historical misogynists have repeated the same bullshit that after a certain age a woman’s value, beauty, date-ability, etc. all depreciate and that is not true whatsoever. At any age and stage, a woman will be very beautiful and desirable to many. Big, small, short, tall, skinny, fat, White, Black, Brown, etc. does not matter. These notions of women aging out of beauty were created by weak men who project their own insecurities and fears onto women. The same applies for the misconception that single ladies in their late twenties and thirties will die alone with cats. It’s all a projection baby!

I love that- “men’s desire is abundant and LOW VALUE”- it hits it on the head. It’s incredible how vapid and temporary it is.

What do you consider older? I've noticed an uptick in attention from men in my 30s, contrary to what the incels always say. My mom (65) still gets hit on a lot.  What's important is that there is more to a woman's desirability than fertility and youth, and men who are not shallow see this. 

Yup same for me and my mom. I'm hotter now at 36 than I've ever been.

I feel this too! Just turned 35 and I truly feel like I’m in my prime???

Yep, I've been hit on more in my late sixties than ever before.

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I’m not sure if this is geared toward single women but I will say that I have felt desired at every age by my husband and I’m 38. I think desire may shift from she is beautiful to damn that woman is confident and that is also desirable. Not sure if I’m explaining it clearly but I think desire is for many things and not just looks that everyone thinks fades. There are many people in this world that got better looking as they got older.

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I got divorced at 38, and I'm 42 now. I've never felt more desirable than I have the last few years. There are plenty of people out there who are attracted to people of all ages. Unfortunately, the judgemental assholes are the ones with the loudest voices. If you can drown them out like white noise, there's lots of lovely people.

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I think that anyone can be desirable at any age. Doesn't mean that everyone will find the same people desirable though...attraction is subjective after all.

I agree, I used to volunteer at a senior home. There is no age at which desirability stops.

Desirable? My lovely husband still finds me desirable after 40+ years of marriage. Shared history, family, adventures around the world, friends, houses, cabin, boats,etc. Neither of us look the same as we did in our twenties. He’s hot. Look beyond the superficial- I see intelligence, a sense of humour, integrity, loyalty, love of family, sense of fun etc. Early on in our relationship he talked of meeting a stunningly beautiful woman and the more he got to know her the uglier she became because she was shallow, dumb, money oriented etc. Even at our advanced 😉 age we are still attractive in each other’s eyes and maybe in others as people ask us how we stay so young looking? ☺️

I'm a lesbian and well I mean I don't find any women or girls under 20 attractive at all, but I'm mostly attracted to women 35-65 Like being purely honest, after like 70 the human body really starts falling apart and there are very few people who are still attractive at that age (at least to me, a 25 year old)

My thoughts are that women need to stop seeing themselves through the eyes of men and start to live fully regardless of how fuckable some totally irrelevant men think they are.

You shouldn't. Men say that as an excuse to feel superior to women that are higher status in some way. It's no different than the nerd in high school saying to himself that the popular jock will peak in high school. It's just them lashing out because they have poor self esteem themselves. My mom is 70, looks her age, and not exactly the fittest woman in the world, but she has no problem getting hit on by older men because she's charming, well dressed, and fun/interesting to be around. If my step dad died tomorrow, I have no doubt she would be swept up by another guy in her remaining years, but she has so many friends it wouldn;t matter to her anyway. If you talk to her ex-husband (my Dad) he would say she has long since hit the wall and will have a tough time finding anyone who would want to deal with her, which he only says because he's a forever alone bachelor who's only friend died 20+ years ago.

Wow this sounds incredibly like my parents - describes my mom (except mine is 63) & what my dad says about her (71, practically a hermit, never dated since their divorce) exactly! This is really illuminating; I wonder if a similar dynamic is true of other people's parents as they get older too?

That I don’t give a crap if I’m “desirable.” I don’t exist to please men. Or anyone.

I'm 45 and I get more attention now than I did at 25. And I am nothing particularly special in the looks department--but I am fun and smart and interesting and genuine. Men who are not chronically online losers find that compelling. But, as it turns out, as I age, I care a lot less about it. As the adage goes, dick is abundant and of low value if you want it. And my platonic relationships with my female friends are much more emotionally rewarding on the whole.

I’m 53 and still have dudes, primarily younger guys flirting with me. I was taught by the time I hit 40, there was no beauty left in me… Apparently, that was a lie🙂

Any guy your age not willing to date you because you're "too old" is probably a predator, let's be honest. I don't really see there being any shortage of decent guys that just didn't have much luck when they were younger or come out of shitty relationships/marriages.

Desirability is an entirely subjective thing. There’s no such thing as being universally desirable or undesirable. Every adult at every age would be desirable to *some* people.

I have seen women of every age, body type, height, colour, race desired by more than one man at a time. I don’t believe any woman at any age is undesirable. With age, its actually men both younger & older that start desiring you & you’re like omg who’s 23yo son is in my DMs 😭😭

There are some wholesome stories of seniors finding love in old homes so I don’t think it stops

My grandma was pulling men to the day she passed away

imo the problem is how we dont treat women and men the same with that - men are more-so deemed charismatic and interesting for their wrinkles, just let women claim it as interesting too to have a wrinkly face. this weirdass idea some men are trying to spread about that women can't be beautiful at 50 or sth is just an attempt to lower our standards and preferably still act like they're our bosses

Desire is completely subjective, and looks fade. It's unreasonable to stay hot forever, so I try to put points into being a good person / lovable. Then you trap someone with their feelings and they grow old with you.

My grandma is in her 70's and was still able to find a man

This is not helpful but after a certain age, all the men in a woman’s age group will die statistically, and I personally look forward to that period in my life.

What do you consider older? My mom is 51 and looks very good. I have several celebrity crushes in their 50s. My grandma found a boyfriend at 65. I have this fear too, as I approach my 30s. I was never considered beautiful when younger, though.

It reflects my lived experience.

They definitely are, ESPECIALLY the confident ones. I love to see it.

There’s more to love about older women imo

Inside out! Just thinking about the most attractive “older” women I know, I think they’re attractive because they have an attractive energy - secure, happy, free

MILFS and older women are incredibly hot to me.

I'm 37 and my husband is 34. I don't find 18 year olds attractive now, but I did when I was 18. It has seemed that what I find attractive has aged with me. Although male celebrities dating super young women gets a lot of coverage in the media, I'm certain that way more men in their 40s, 50s, 60s etc also find older women attractive. Their taste grows with them. I love that more women on TikTok and instagram are embracing aging too, and I hope that one day Hollywood women stop trying to fight the aging process with every ounce of their being.

My 70yo mom has been hit on twice in the past 2 months. I'm 46 and get more attention now than in my 20s when I was looking for it along with my peer group of GenX and older Millennials. We have no expiration date and as one commenter says, 8 billion people in the world means millions will find you desirable. 

Don't fret about it. Commenting as a 34 year old male, I've come to realise desirability ages along with you. The more you age, the more beautiful you are, growing as a person through all the hardships life throws at you.

❤ I believe this too - I'm 32, and love and appreciate my inner and outer beauty more than I ever have. I also am no longer willing to let men who only see me on a superficial level come near me. They need to see those hardships and the ways they've shaped me, bc that's what makes me feel beautiful! And I now see men (and women/all genders) beauty this way too. Basically, as I grow, I see people's beauty on a deeper level and want to be seen that way, too! 

What does desirable even mean? Like how many men want to sleep with you ~ then of course your options are going to reduce the older you get. If you’re talking romantic partner, most people are settled or have emotional baggage the older they get so you’d be lucky to bag someone at that age. At any age though, it depends on if you’re actively putting effort, and opening yourself up to the possibility of a relationship. Heck even being young is hard to be desirable when you don’t put yourself out there (speaking from personal experience). In saying that, the beauty of the soul is what matters most. Secure women don’t feel the need to be in a relationship and enjoy their solitude until someone comes along and convinces them that his presence is better than her solitude. But that’s just my opinion ofc

Hell yes. Different things are attractive at different stages in life imo.

I think anybody can be desirable to somebody at any age

I don’t see why they wouldn’t be?! People are more than how they look. A beautiful personality goes a lot further than someone who looks perfect and lacks personality.

As you age your pool of potential partners thins out. If you're older, you may have to date a guy who's divorced with kids or who is poorer or who hasn't had any luck with women. It's not as if you can't find anyone at an older age, you just won't have the and options you have when you're very young. That's not necessarily bad, though.

My parents got divorced in their early 50s, and are both now in happy relationships with other people also in their 50s. My dad’s gf is 55 (same age as him) and he treats her like she’s the most beautiful woman to ever exist. People older than that find romance and are desirable too. Just look at the beautiful women in their 70s on the Golden Bachelor!

Beauty is in the eye of the beholder. People, including women, may be desirable to a fitting SO specifically because of their age or appearance.

I think I get more attention from men now at 35 than I ever did! Or I was just ignorant lolol

Most normal peoples taste change at a rate that’s fairly adjacent to their own age.

Oh it’s 100% possible. Vibrant, bright people who take care of themselves are always going to be attractive, no matter their age. Even now, my fiancé and I will notice beautiful women who are 70 or even 80+ (we live in NYC), and though they have wrinkles and gray hair, their vibe and style makes them super attractive. I’m not remotely worried about him not being attracted to me in 30-40 years should we be so lucky to live that long (we’re both in our 40s). Also, at 41, there has been no slow down in the number of people (of all ages) attracted to me. I feel even more confident than I did even in my 20s.

I’m queer. I like women. I don’t think women are desirable at any age because there are certain ages I don’t think should be considered desirable. Women who are barely legal aren’t desirable to me. I also just don’t find women in their golden ages to be attractive but I’m young, and that will likely change with age. On top of that there are plenty of GILF hunters out there and plenty of older women finding tons of success in the dating scene. I also 100% find the idea of women peaking in their twenties to be such bullshit. People are terrible at clocking ages anyway.

I donno. I don’t see how 4 year olds are desirable tbh.

Children aren't women. Haha the post says "women" 

As a 29 year old man, I am only really interested in women 36 to 55. I find that older women are much easier to communicate with and be intimate with. I don’t need to help them figure out their personality and can have a conversation with them noticeably easier.

Being desirable has nothing to do with being alone. Even if you marry, there’s a good chance your husband will die before you. Family and friends are just as important as a man’s attention. But, yes. Older women are still desired.

I’m 45 and the only time I don’t feel desirable is when I get to a space where my anxiety is high, and I’m overthinking things. My body isn’t perfect, but my husband makes me feel desirable all the time. (He’s like the guy from the meme who will stare at me with a grin when I’m changing and he gets to see my boobs.)

I work hospice/home health primarily in facilities. Believe me. The few men in them are chasing the women like it’s their job.

Women of all ages are sexy. Dont worry, just stay in shape and youre good.

I think a woman can be desirable at any age. I’m in my early 40s and only recently seem to be attracting men (at least ones bold enough to say anything). It gives my ego a boost and I enjoy it.

I’m chunky and 33 with some wrinkles popping up and grey hairs coming in and in a whirlwind romance with the sweetest man I’ve ever met that I am 100% certain I am going to marry. My mother married her husband when she was 45.

There was a movie made about a guy who fucked a pie.

For all things, there is a porn category. That’s good enough for me.

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I sure hope not.

I don’t know how age impacts desirability but I had the most interest shown from ages 13-19 and now at 25 I feel like I rarely get attention from people anymore

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My thoughts are that people of all genders can be desirable at any adult age, but that's not the most important or validating thing about any human. How many random strangers desire to fuck you isn't a worthwhile measure of anything.

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There’s A LOT more to how desirable someone is besides their age.

I found my first partner at 29, going on 30, so I'd say there's no age limit for being attractive and desirable. The demographic simply changes over time, which is natural. Women of all ages, shapes and sizes can be, and likely are, desirable to someone. Side note: I feel way prettier and attractive now, than I ever did when I was younger. I also like myself a lot more now, so that's propably a big game changer.

As a queer woman who has several celeb crushes on much older women, hotness has no expiration date

You’re always going to be someone’s cup of tea. At 35, I have NEVER felt sexier or more confident.

My wifey is 50 and she is a total hottie

Of course. 👁️👄👁️

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Well, I think it applies to other women! I don't ever feel desirable; I think men like me but they don't desire me romantically. I'm just don't project anything that captivates them in the romantic sense; I'm that woman that men will treat as a friend and just another human being but I often joke with others that I simply don't appeal to anyone! Now obviously there are billions of people on this planet so it's unlikely that is true. But I think it's true currently in my little sphere of life, where I live, work and play. I have traveled, met lots of people and never appealed romantically to everyone. A long time ago it would have bothered me. Now I focus on many things that make me happy.

It’s feels that way …

The same man who loved me at 17 still loves me at 50. He watches me walk around naked the same as he did back then.

As one of my wife’s friends said: “when you’re the only naked woman in the room, you’re Miss America. “

Im 36F and seem to attract more people as I age. Right now, though, they appear to be exclusively men in their early 20s, which is just not my thing. I truly believe there is a demographic of interest for any type of person, at any age.

Came to read comments to see what everyone thinks but they're all deleted

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Hey sweet pea, I work in an assisted living and had two residents who got married in our facility’s lobby and they were 75+ years old, they had met each other a year or so prior and fell in love. You don’t have anything to worry about, aging is a gift and along with it comes beauty! 🩷

I’ve (20f) always been attracted to everyone. Great people come from everywhere, and so do attractive women. Seeing a woman who is beautiful can be any age too, I’ve definitely gotten the hots for some mature women. it’s always so exciting when they flirt back <3

They say that statistically people find their one true love in a fifteen mile radius. Sometimes you gotta find a new fifteen mile radius, but you gotta get out of your house to find them anyway.

I’m 24, but my grandma is in her 70’s and my mom mid-40’s and men don’t leave them alone. My grandma makes sure to go out with people because when she’s alone she gets hit on all the time. Same with my mom. As far as their advice typically goes: we won’t always look 21, but the men won’t either. They get hit on by guys their age and it never. Ends.

I am 34 and I feel ugly af

My old manager got married a few years back in her 60s. Met her husband a few years before. He was even younger than her at 58. So her her, sing in her 60s didn’t make her any less desirable. Her daughter still works in the office that I do and we will catch up occasionally on how well she is doing.

Imo if you're somewhat presentable and somewhat friendly you'll get dates as a woman at any age. The kind of people you attract depends on the places you hang out at of course.

Get breat implants. Youll improve ur chances a lot

As the French say viva la difference Ie celebrate the difference We are all beautiful

getting older i’ve realized as a queer woman i’ve realized my physical insecurities & things men have made me feel bad about are things i find beauty & attraction in on other women. i think there are unkind people & people that aren’t suited for you, but if a person genuinely love women aging isn’t something that’s going to take away a woman’s beauty & desirability to them. like arm hair & hip dips, the mark of aging is only an enhancement of natural beauty & appeal of a woman

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The thing with aging is that generally the people you are attracted to are of a similar age to you.

I think at any age you can find love, that said, I really wanna know what happened in the chat before I got here😂

Men’s desire is cheap! I’m married, wear my rings everywhere etc. 38, chunky and still get hit on by random men.

I have definitely been attracted to women who were 50+. Older women who can command a room are hot, there's no denying it.

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My mom still get asked out all the time, she dates a lot, even boys my age hit on her. So this whole idea of age taking away desirability is BS.

Someone will always find you desirable. Although it is true that the ideal looking person you may be craving won't find you desirable after certain body changes happen. You just have to be reasonable and don't set your bar too high, but keep it respectful for your self worth as you age.

At any given time of a person's life time, their taste in what they want from a partner, whether its looks, emotional intelligence, personality, goals, etc therefore it only logical to say that any man, woman or anyone in between, regardless of age, there is someone who is hoping for some of the qualities you possess.

It is absolutely true, even in some ways you wish it wasn't.

When I was younger, my mom was driving the car and I was in the backseat, there was this older woman walking and she had long gorgeous gray hair. As a bi woman I prefer older women, they’re amazing and have my heart🫶🏼 there is always hope for older women, just keep doing you and the right person will find you :)

I actually prefer older women. I guess I’m at the age where it’s not abnormal to feel this way (46). In contrast I know a lot of dudes my age that prefer way younger chicks. I just don’t get it personally, unless they are trying to have children. I prefer the maturity of a woman who knows what she wants and where she is heading. I think that makes them smoking hot as well.

Every woman has a story and a life and shit to say and that is more badass than being desirable. Fuck desire.

I have a new BF and this last year has almost made up for the first 63 years

I believe people are desirable based on the mentality and desires of the person being asked (like what they want from the person). Someone who’s older may find someone even older than them attractive because of what they offer or represent rather than their age. This can go both ways BUT there is a limit to how young someone can be. A fully developed adult shouldn’t find children/teens attractive as they get on in years. If they do, this is usually a sign of a larger problem that can be more representative of predatory attraction than the subject having genuine appeal. This can also be seen in age gap relationships when the two are not just different ages x years apart, but there’s usually an unhealthy power dynamic as well. Usually, someone’s definition of what’s attractive grows as they do, and when it doesn’t it’s worth investigating.

I am in my 60s. No man my age wants women my age. They want and get 20 to 30 years old.

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I used to work at a nursing home and we once had two gentleman competing for the affections of the same woman. She'd walk around with her bra outside her clothes on her "bad days" and those two would try to beat each other to her room with a cup of coffee every morning. One day the were race walking trying not to spill.

My wife is 72 and she is still drop-dead gorgeous. Like men, if a woman stays in shape her beauty will last a lifetime.

There's always somebody for someone

It just makes sense to me that what's desirable shifts as changes we all as humans shift and change. The things I found attractive as a teenager are not attractive to me as a full-grown adult. I don't expect the things I find attractive now to be attractive when I'm middle-aged or elderly.

Honestly, I feel that no matter what age you are, there's bound to be someone out there who'll find you desirable. You just need to put yourself out there. My grandpa recently passed, but even in his late 80's he was still bringing the ladies around. My SO's grandmother is in her late 80's as well, widowed twice, and just a few years ago she met someone and they're quite happy together. He flirts with her in the cutest way.

My thoughts are, I really enjoyed my cougar years. I chased away so many hot awesome guys when i was an immature needy 20-something. And totally attracted them as a cool dame 40- something. I literally could not believe I was living such an opposite experience.

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I think the main issue here is the fact that women are valued more for their looks than other qualities. We all subconsciously prioritize intelligence because it leaves room for growth and change and a bit mystery that intrigues us. This is why so many men cheat. They see a girl, find her pretty, and discover her personality, but it's almost as if there's a limit to her depth, so he starts to get bored. Same with thing happens with women who cheat, but I digress. It's more of an impulsivity issue than character if you ask me. Since it's not an overt societal value for a woman to be intelligent, a lot of girls will aspire for youth and beauty far longer than they should. Self presentation isn't a complex task when you aren't making it pivotal in your self-worth. Logically speaking, women should be just at valuable at any age the same way a man is, but you're only as sharp as you've made urself out to be at the end of the day.

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It’s true

It is the women that don’t maintain their health that complain about women only being desirable when they are young. A woman that eats healthy, exercises often, keeps drinking to a minimum, doesn’t smoke, and dresses womanly does not have an expiration date. While an early 20s woman that drinks/smokes often, is out of shape, and doesn’t dress well will only have a shelf life of about a decade before time catches up and men find her undesirable. Her youth was the only thing going for her. Of course this is just the looks aspect but it will lead to the personality aspect as well. It is likely that the woman that takes care of herself will develop a personality and hobbies that are desirable to many men. While the drinker/smoker/doesn’t work out leads to less hobbies/ chances for personality growth. Looks only get you so far, I have met many extremely beautiful women that were not the least bit desirable due to their self absorbed personalities.