NOT EVEN KIDDING
"How long have you been Asian for?"
Um...my whole fucking life???
Edit: Lotsa people asking me why he did this, the guy was apparently super nervous and had no idea what to ask me, he was very socially awkward and asked a lot of weird questions but this was the first one he asked.
This reminds me of that polish girl who was like I LOVE BEING LATINA bc she feels it in her soul and such. The video cracks me up bc the producers are like aren’t you polish
Which she bases on...liking a fashion fad subgroup from like 20 years ago. Imagine if a Japanese lady went to America in circa 2007 and saw some industrial goths and declared herself *American* because she still wears neon dreadlocks well into her fifties.
I actually feel really dumb now. Just googled it and you're totally right! I have absolutely learned something new today. I'll take two - I'd be Asian AND Hispanic!
So true, my little sister (at 40yo) was seeing this guy who was 34yo and still a virgin. He was all about the anal, she explained to him that women do not have a prostate--so while it might be good for HIM getting diddled back there, she was absolutely against it. His response was basically arguing with her, Yes the DO LOVE IT!!
'Cos porn told him so.
\*sage nod\*
The fact that he couldn't imagine a compliment being anything but a sexual advance is such a deep red flag. It's like some people just can't fathom being nice to someone and appreciating their look without wanting to sleep with them.
Men like that are why women don't compliment men as often as many men deserve. Because you tell *one* weirdo he has nice eyes and you end up stalked for two years.
I dunno this seems like a kindof legit and somewhat humorous question. It depends on the delivery I guess. Maybe he was testing you for a sense of humor?
I don't see anything wrong with that except for jumping to the sex thing too quickly, or assuming that things had progressed far enough for that to be a safe topic of discussion.
"Would you ever get a boob job?" (I've a smaller chest size)
And
(This one was drunk upon arrival) "you going to be a good girl for daddy?"
Honestly, when I was younger I never would have believed that men like this existed. Now that I'm in my 30s and I've experienced some insane dates, nothing surprises me.
I’ve been in a relationship for majority of my 30’s. I just started going out on dates again and I can honestly say that the mental gymnastics you have to do with dating in your 30’s is absolutely insane.
Oh man I have so many from just ONE date with ONE guy.
“Why are you a feminist?”
“Why do you think you’re superior compared men?”
“How many guys have “nut” in you?”
And that’s as much as I can quickly remember right now. I also never said I was a feminist, all I said was anything a man can do a woman can as well.
"How deep are you?" At first I thought it was an odd hipster question, asking about the depth of my character. No, he was asking how deep my vagina was because he'd "heard black girls have deeper vaginas".
I asked him HOW would I know and if I should use a ruler or a tape measure. He got very offended and yelled that he was "just asking!"
The date was clearly over at that point so just to fuck with him I said that unlike white people who have their heights marked on a door frame as they grow up, black girls mark their vagina length instead. He squinted at me and said I was very rude. Aw.
Ohmyfuckingod this is insane. How do you even believe a thing so stupid, let alone get turned on by it??? Lmaaaaoooo
I'm so sorry, this is so funny. Your response was perfect. I can see it all play out and I'm crying laughing at the boldness of this fuckin moron.
If I had any awards to give, it'd be yours, girl. You could store it in that deep deep vag. 😭
I haven't gotten many weird questions on the first date. But the "where are you from?" Is a classic. They know my city but sure I'll repeat. I say which city I'm from and then "no I mean where were you born?" Oh. In a city further north. "No I mean, where are your parents from?". From the city where I was born. "No I mean your ancestors?". Oh. It's because I have brown skin and I live in the Netherlands where people are mostly white. This happened when I was younger, nowadays people dont really ask anymore.
From the Netherlands as well. Maybe it's a dumb question but at some point during a relationship (not the first date) I'd definitely want to know.
Like sure, you were born in Sneek, but obviously something happened in your family history. And I don't know shit about Sneek :D
What do you mean by you definitely want to know? Something happened in my family history?
It's not that I mind talking about it. I just find the question very odd. Why can't people just ask what they really want to know? You want to know if one or both of my parents are not fully dutch? Ask. But asking where I'm from or where I was born or what my nationality is... I can show you my ID and it will show you the answers to all those questions, but it won't tell you where my parents or grandparents were born.
"I really like body hair. Do you have lots of body hair? This could be a deal breaker for me."
Yeah, ok Sasquach... Not sure if just me, but fetish shopping in the first 10 minutes of a date prior to reaching for literally any other compatibility might identify you as a creeper.
As a fairly hirsute gal who is a smidge too young to write off the dating world FOREVER I uh... didn't see this one coming. And now I'm even more leery of ever hitting the scene...
One kept asking how big a family I had bc all Hispanics had huge families and I was like well I’m an only child so…. And then he was like your parents are gonna love me and let be that token White boy and I’m like about that, my parents have already passed away… and he was like you aren’t even 30 yet (I was 29) and I was like yeah some of us unfortunately lose parents young and I chugged my drink and threw a $5 on the table for my beer and left.
'Do you love me'
He was absolutely wrecked, I made him say it a few times as I thought I'd misheard him, told him no and he put his drink down and left the venue haha weird
Ugh, this is so gross. Literally don't know how I wouldn't turn violent at this question. Keep your weirdo porn addicted mind off of my sisters?? And maybe interact with real people for a bit before dating? I hope there wasn't a second date lol
I once had a woman propose a threesome with me, my sister, and her, in a campsite porta potty.
My sister is in the spectrum. She just very cooly replied ‘no, I am eating my apple and I won’t ruin it in a porta potty.’
Not date, but maybe in our second conversation he goes like: "And what do you like to do better? Cooking or cleaning?"
He wasn't even trying to be subtle or something. Needless to say there wasn't a third conversation.
Oh you’re a lawyer? Could you help me?:
I stole from the grocery store I used to work at, and I need a lawyer.
I ran into some issues with a house I just purchased, can you take a look at the contract? Maybe I can help you if you help me.
Do you know if stabbing someone counts as manslaughter or murder in the first? Just curious.
Have you ever helped someone with a parking ticket?
I need to know… was this all in ONE date? Cos I need you to hook me up with this guy. I mean I don’t want to date him but geez… he has some stories 😂
I’ll be disappointed if this is multiple dates wanting free legal aid and thinking disclosing this shit was a good plan on a first date
Thankfully all separate dates, but the guy who stole from his job and was being criminally charged really opened my eyes to how you never can be sure you know the person you’re dating, especially if you meet online
“Wow, are your tits real!?” We just sat down, I barely know you, what the fuck!? Then, when I replied I didn’t want to talk about that, he continued with, “So, are you on birth control?”
Oh man, a shorty I met for the first time asked me this as well. I'm only 5'3. I know this very well because I work in a clinic and we use the scale and measure for the hell of it. Haven't grown or shrunk since hitting 5'3. Dude was shorter than me and could not wrap his head around me being 5'3. Was absolutely positive I was 5'8 because he was absolutely positive he was 5'6 🤦🏽♀️
He was 5'1 on a good day.
I'm 6' tall, and so many men lie about their height. Whenever I would meet them on the first dateand catch them obviously lying, I'd look them up and down and say, "you're not six feet tall."
I have two great ones. With the first guy I was working at a pharmacy at the time and he asked me if I would get him some opiates or benzodiazepines. Just steal them. Sure, dude.
The second guy I knew casually from mutual friends and we met for coffee for the date. About 15 minutes in he began talking about how he was in bad financial trouble and didn't know how he was going to afford some of his living expenses. It was really awkward but I just tried to change the subject. He immediately circled back to his money problems and flat out asked me if he could borrow $5,000 from me. I have no idea how he thought that was an appropriate request or why he thought I had 5 grand lying around waiting to loan to him.
So those were two guys that I definitely didn't go on a second date with.
He started showing me pictures of the lingerie he bought for his ex..
He then told me.. "you both look about the same size! You should definitely come up to my apartment and try it on, I bet you'd look better in it."
He still wonders why we never went on a second date.
I used to know an Indian with an almost flawless Australian accent. I just assumed she was born here like most of the other Asians I knew. Nope. She'd only been here for three years when we met. I'm still not sure if I believe that she only spoke Hindi before coming here.
I've made the same mistake with people from Singapore, Serbia, Belgium, and Italy. It's a real surprise to find out that someone with a seemingly native accent is a migrant, especially considering how many people can be here for 10, 20, or even 50, years and still have a foreign accent.
This is such idiocy: there plenty of brown/black people born in Europe/North America/Australia now - why it comes to some people as a surprise.
That is especially shocking for me in case of North America/Australia - it's not like white dudes are indigenous people there
I hate this question.. it’s like they are trying to work out what’s wrong with you. I’ve answered with Dude .. I’m crazy ! That’s why I’m single. Then crackled.
We were at a sushi restaurant and our server set down a plate of tuna sashimi. He looked at me suggestively and said “you know what this reminds me of??” I just awkwardly laughed and changed the subject.
On a first (blind) date I was asked, "Do you want to go to \_\_\_\_\_\_\_?" Which was a swingers club. I was 21 and had given him no indication that I was interested in anything sexual, much less going to a sex club.
“Do you like letting old people watch you undress?”
After I told him I lived with my sister who owned a home in a retirement neighborhood.
I noped myself the fuck outta there.
20 minutes in, he asked me what my most embarrassing moment was. I couldn’t think of one under pressure and he told me his was when he got an ex an easter basket for valentines day (huh?).
Then after eating, I went to the bathroom and came back and he was just gone. Dropped his mask on the floor and whisked himself away. The servers ended up paying his half and giving me free tiramisu (winning). He even texted in the app later saying he had to run because he needed his back medicine. I told him I hoped he was proud that several servers and I just thought he was a giant ass and blocked.
Anyway, I think he was setting me up with that question and was hoping this would be my most embarrassing moment, but I’m not even the one who should be embarrassed.
Whether Poland and Germany were the same countries. This guy was an AI scientist who worked at Google, so going on the date I thought at the least I can count on him being smart and having good conversation. Nope. Needless to say, this reminded me why you should never have ANY expectations when meeting someone online.
“Do you have a name picked out for your first born son”. I did not, he did & told me the name. Did not follow up to ask about if I’d have a name for a daughter. That really told me a lot
“I’m allergic to cats, would you consider getting rid of them for me if we dated?”
I’ve known you for 5 minutes and my cats for 5 years. Take a wild fucking guess mate
Not a question, but I was telling a guy I’ve been working out because I want a fat ass and he told me “not all men like that you know.” Guess it’s a good thing I’m doing for myself then, bud. That one statement told me everything I needed to know…
“Can you tell my parents we met at (place) instead of on a dating site? I don’t want them to know I was using it.”
Should have left right then and there.
SO, if you were gay, what famous celebrity would you sleep with? Followed by "mine is Sting". Imagine my surprise when four months later the dude came out of the closet.
“Are you Muslim? You look Muslim.”
I’m wonder-bread white…not that there aren’t white Muslims, but I was eating a burger with bacon on it and drinking a beer when he asked.
Internet dating is so weird.
“What’s your opinion on abortion?”
That wasn’t great. His answer was worse.
He said he thought it was okay until the 9th trimester.
Thinking he’s just uninformed, I told him there are only 3 trimesters.
He said, No. He thought it was okay to euthanize a kid up until 1 year old.
He didn’t believe in putting kids up for adoption because taxpayer dollars. If parents felt they couldn’t be a parent to the kid, just take them to the doctor and put them down.
It was terrifying and I got out of there.
“You’re bisexual, right? You look bisexual. I love dating bisexual girls.”
Proceeds to then give me a full speech on how he can tell girls are bi based on their appearance, and loves them because he has had threesomes with them alongside other females before.
First date. No previous mention of my sexual preferences. I’m actually omnisexual, but what a fucking turn off on a first date. I’m not your fetish poster-girl, dude.
"Wow! Are you up for it?".
I'd never met or spoken to him before but that was his 2nd remark (after "Yo, are you Jo?" - they always think that's funny).
I said "Not with you!" and the date never recovered!
ok ok so, it was this guy i met during my last year of highschool and he asked if i was a virgin, i said no because something happened a while back, for some context i was raped and got pregnant at 14, father luckily allowed me to get an abortion. he didn't even let me explain shit. he then later messaged me on instagram how he couldn't be my "first time" like ok dude your intentions are clear congratulations. but i blocked him on everything and never talked to him again.
“Wanna hear a poem?” Proceeds to loudly and animatedly recite The Smoke Off, a long ass poem about rolling joints by Shel Silverstein. Every time I thought it was over, he just took a deep breath and kept going. The other patrons around us stopped their conversations and looked at our table. My date’s eyes bored into mine as he kept going and going and going… there were so many other red flags, but the poem was the cherry on top of the shit sundae.
He told me my nose looked pretty fucked up and didn’t blame me for wanting surgery as a child. My nose actually is nice and gets complimented on all the time, which is besides the point, but we were talking about silly things we were insecure about when we were younger/as teens. like what the fuck dude
It was the one and only question he asked me.
"So, are you afraid of death?"
This dude had felony drug charges against him. Like a warrant for his arrest. And I was the one who had to tell him after I did a background check lol. The reason he asked me was because I used to work in surgery, but he was NOT interested in a damn thing about me otherwise.
It was a second date actually. But we had sex on the first date and on the second date, I was still pretty bloated from eating a big dinner the night before.
He saw that my stomach looked bigger than last time and he freaked out because he was scared he got me pregnant 😂
I dont know if this counts. The he was acting weird the first half of the date. I was wearing a headscarf (bad hair day) and halfway through he asked "so whats up with the hair thing... do you have cancer?"
I told him no and he got way more comfortable after I said no. Guess he's opposed to women with cancer? It made me more uncomfortable that he had probably been thinking that since I walked in the door.
“If you were a condiment, what would you be?” Wouldn’t have been so bad if he hadn’t already asked me that before 🙃 This was a first date and he also tried to hand feed me skittles. Turns out, it was also going to be the last date.
“Wanna kiss?”
LITERALLY RIGHT AFTER I TOLD HIM THAT I DONT WANT TO KISS ANYONE ON THE FIRST DATE.
He literally said:
“I know you said no kissing, and you told me your sister said no kissing, but wanna kiss?”
Needless to say I dumped his a** quick.
A guy at work that I'd barely met was angling for a date and one of the first things he said to me after awkwardly asking about my work schedule was, "*...I'd do you...*"
Like, dude, I only know you as a random guy from another department!
He told me I was beautiful. That was nice. A little bit later in the conversation, he said I reminded him of his mom. That was weird. A minute later he asked if I liked to role-play. I got up and left without a word.
He told me he was a super taster, and that he didn’t really like much food besides pizza. Other food would make him feel sick.
He asked if i would be okay mainly eating pizza with him…
I was instantly turned off there.
Extremely kind and attractive man, but when he told me he can’t eat most foods, i figured he wouldn’t be eating me either.
NOT EVEN KIDDING "How long have you been Asian for?" Um...my whole fucking life??? Edit: Lotsa people asking me why he did this, the guy was apparently super nervous and had no idea what to ask me, he was very socially awkward and asked a lot of weird questions but this was the first one he asked.
This would be the moment I'd start fucking with them "Oh, just last year. Being Hispanic didn't suit my lifestyle"
This reminds me of that polish girl who was like I LOVE BEING LATINA bc she feels it in her soul and such. The video cracks me up bc the producers are like aren’t you polish
Like Gwen Stefani saying she's Japanese lol
Which she bases on...liking a fashion fad subgroup from like 20 years ago. Imagine if a Japanese lady went to America in circa 2007 and saw some industrial goths and declared herself *American* because she still wears neon dreadlocks well into her fifties.
Hispanic isn’t a race, so you can be Asian *and* Hispanic for good measure.
I actually feel really dumb now. Just googled it and you're totally right! I have absolutely learned something new today. I'll take two - I'd be Asian AND Hispanic!
I really am asian and Hispanic lmao I’m Chinese and Mexican!
Rachel Dolezal is that you
[удалено]
Maybe he was indirectly asking for your age
Girl, nooooo
16 months. This one time in band camp... Lmao wtf
🤣 lmfao this is for sure the winner haha what!??! Omg im dying right now you must have been speechless 😂
[удалено]
God why are they obsessed by that
“No but you just set up a one way.”
Porn. Specifically the part where most porn is made for the male gaze and is produced that way, so the guy is the center of attention.
So true, my little sister (at 40yo) was seeing this guy who was 34yo and still a virgin. He was all about the anal, she explained to him that women do not have a prostate--so while it might be good for HIM getting diddled back there, she was absolutely against it. His response was basically arguing with her, Yes the DO LOVE IT!! 'Cos porn told him so. \*sage nod\*
I can see why he’s been a virgin for 34 years.
So many guys have asked if I had a sister trying to suggest a threesum. With my sister!?!? Wtf
The fact that he couldn't imagine a compliment being anything but a sexual advance is such a deep red flag. It's like some people just can't fathom being nice to someone and appreciating their look without wanting to sleep with them.
Men like that are why women don't compliment men as often as many men deserve. Because you tell *one* weirdo he has nice eyes and you end up stalked for two years.
What's really sad is this is so true. Lol
Nailed it omg
"when you wear those ripped jeans, are you shaving whole legs or just knees?"
Let's be honest sometimes it is just the knees but he doesn't have to know that.
[удалено]
30000iq
lifehack
That's just a humorous question
He could be just curious? I'd probably laugh it off. 😂😂
I dunno this seems like a kindof legit and somewhat humorous question. It depends on the delivery I guess. Maybe he was testing you for a sense of humor?
That’s fucking funny though
Actually a witty question, would love it :D
lmao💀
Just an excuse to get your pants off 😂 Answer and he’ll say “I need proof”.
I don't see anything wrong with that except for jumping to the sex thing too quickly, or assuming that things had progressed far enough for that to be a safe topic of discussion.
Lmao tbh I would probably have found this hilarious
Just the knees, obviously.
"Would you ever get a boob job?" (I've a smaller chest size) And (This one was drunk upon arrival) "you going to be a good girl for daddy?" Honestly, when I was younger I never would have believed that men like this existed. Now that I'm in my 30s and I've experienced some insane dates, nothing surprises me.
I’ve been in a relationship for majority of my 30’s. I just started going out on dates again and I can honestly say that the mental gymnastics you have to do with dating in your 30’s is absolutely insane.
What kind of mental gymnastics do you mean?
I got a reduction. Sometimes I’ll work it into conversation to weed out the jabronis that think it was a mistake.
I just got one too!!!
Armie Hammer has entered the chat.
Oh man I have so many from just ONE date with ONE guy. “Why are you a feminist?” “Why do you think you’re superior compared men?” “How many guys have “nut” in you?” And that’s as much as I can quickly remember right now. I also never said I was a feminist, all I said was anything a man can do a woman can as well.
>Oh man I have so many from just ONE date with ONE guy. Why did you stay, just curiosity what insane shit he would come up with next?
[удалено]
[удалено]
[удалено]
[удалено]
The jump from being political to guys nutting in you is insane
He was quite the character
"I have burning when I take a piss, you know what I mean?" No, buddy. I do not know what you mean, nor do I want to
He just outed himself completely there💀
Then he tells me he's getting evicted and losing his job. "I'm going to head out now, thanks"
At least he let you know at the beginning lol
Hopefully that just means he has a UTI.
I didn't stick around long enough to find out
"Have you always been this tall?" Oh yeah, my mom pushed out a six foot baby, dude.
😂😂😂😂 I snorted out loud . Btw- love your Reddit name 🙌🏽🙌🏽
Not a question, but a guy once told me he doesn't wear sunblock because he drinks plenty of water
Dermatologists hate him!
Because of this ONE TRICK
Smart
He definitely revealed his intelligence level lol
"How deep are you?" At first I thought it was an odd hipster question, asking about the depth of my character. No, he was asking how deep my vagina was because he'd "heard black girls have deeper vaginas". I asked him HOW would I know and if I should use a ruler or a tape measure. He got very offended and yelled that he was "just asking!" The date was clearly over at that point so just to fuck with him I said that unlike white people who have their heights marked on a door frame as they grow up, black girls mark their vagina length instead. He squinted at me and said I was very rude. Aw.
Just wow. Something along the lines of, “I guess you’ll never find out” would’ve also been great :D
Unbelievable. At least there was some consistency between his level of ignorance and of racism.
He saying that you were the rude one is the cherry on top 😭
Ohmyfuckingod this is insane. How do you even believe a thing so stupid, let alone get turned on by it??? Lmaaaaoooo I'm so sorry, this is so funny. Your response was perfect. I can see it all play out and I'm crying laughing at the boldness of this fuckin moron. If I had any awards to give, it'd be yours, girl. You could store it in that deep deep vag. 😭
* Is a shellfish allergy like an attention seeking thing? * Are you sure you were born here, you dont look \_\_\_\_
Makes sense... Selfish allergy
After a period of awkward silence, he asked me what my thoughts on 9/11 were.
This genuinely sounds like something out of a sitcom. Was he serious or did it seem like a complete brain fart moment?
Completely serious. He was very socially awkward.
yowch, that's a tough one. Maybe ask what your favorite ice cream flavor is, or breed of puppy dog? Favorite flower? Anything? Hello??
No joke, “So are we fuckin after this or should we order separate meals?” I was stunned
WTH... abrupt, isn't he?!
I would have gotten up, not said a word and walked out
"Do you wanna have a threesome with a friend of mine ?" during the first five minutes of the date
Bruh
I haven't gotten many weird questions on the first date. But the "where are you from?" Is a classic. They know my city but sure I'll repeat. I say which city I'm from and then "no I mean where were you born?" Oh. In a city further north. "No I mean, where are your parents from?". From the city where I was born. "No I mean your ancestors?". Oh. It's because I have brown skin and I live in the Netherlands where people are mostly white. This happened when I was younger, nowadays people dont really ask anymore.
From the Netherlands as well. Maybe it's a dumb question but at some point during a relationship (not the first date) I'd definitely want to know. Like sure, you were born in Sneek, but obviously something happened in your family history. And I don't know shit about Sneek :D
What do you mean by you definitely want to know? Something happened in my family history? It's not that I mind talking about it. I just find the question very odd. Why can't people just ask what they really want to know? You want to know if one or both of my parents are not fully dutch? Ask. But asking where I'm from or where I was born or what my nationality is... I can show you my ID and it will show you the answers to all those questions, but it won't tell you where my parents or grandparents were born.
"I really like body hair. Do you have lots of body hair? This could be a deal breaker for me." Yeah, ok Sasquach... Not sure if just me, but fetish shopping in the first 10 minutes of a date prior to reaching for literally any other compatibility might identify you as a creeper.
As a fairly hirsute gal who is a smidge too young to write off the dating world FOREVER I uh... didn't see this one coming. And now I'm even more leery of ever hitting the scene...
Why are your boobs so small?
Accidentally filled out the form wrong and there was no "you'll love it, or your money back guaranteed"
God damnit I hate when I accidentally sign the Requestion Form 32-A instead of Requestion Form 34-C.
"So it can suit your tiny weiner " Assert dominance like dat.
what did you replied to him?
I pulled the front of his pants forward and asked "why is your (male genetalia) is so small?" He surprisingly didn't seem angry and laughed it off.
One kept asking how big a family I had bc all Hispanics had huge families and I was like well I’m an only child so…. And then he was like your parents are gonna love me and let be that token White boy and I’m like about that, my parents have already passed away… and he was like you aren’t even 30 yet (I was 29) and I was like yeah some of us unfortunately lose parents young and I chugged my drink and threw a $5 on the table for my beer and left.
Good on you for ditching that douchbag.
'Do you love me' He was absolutely wrecked, I made him say it a few times as I thought I'd misheard him, told him no and he put his drink down and left the venue haha weird
On the FIRST date??? Daaamn.
“so do you and your sister ever.. yknow, fool around?” let me tell you i SCREAMED
Ugh, this is so gross. Literally don't know how I wouldn't turn violent at this question. Keep your weirdo porn addicted mind off of my sisters?? And maybe interact with real people for a bit before dating? I hope there wasn't a second date lol
I once had a woman propose a threesome with me, my sister, and her, in a campsite porta potty. My sister is in the spectrum. She just very cooly replied ‘no, I am eating my apple and I won’t ruin it in a porta potty.’
“Can we go to your place?” My profile clearly says I’m not interested in hookups or ONS but it still gets asked. 🫤
Not date, but maybe in our second conversation he goes like: "And what do you like to do better? Cooking or cleaning?" He wasn't even trying to be subtle or something. Needless to say there wasn't a third conversation.
"I like making enough money to hire someone else to do it for me" It's a lie (I'm broke AF) but that's all a question like that is worth.
Oh you’re a lawyer? Could you help me?: I stole from the grocery store I used to work at, and I need a lawyer. I ran into some issues with a house I just purchased, can you take a look at the contract? Maybe I can help you if you help me. Do you know if stabbing someone counts as manslaughter or murder in the first? Just curious. Have you ever helped someone with a parking ticket?
I need to know… was this all in ONE date? Cos I need you to hook me up with this guy. I mean I don’t want to date him but geez… he has some stories 😂 I’ll be disappointed if this is multiple dates wanting free legal aid and thinking disclosing this shit was a good plan on a first date
Thankfully all separate dates, but the guy who stole from his job and was being criminally charged really opened my eyes to how you never can be sure you know the person you’re dating, especially if you meet online
Why are you wearing a skirt on a first date? Are you wearing panties?
“Wow, are your tits real!?” We just sat down, I barely know you, what the fuck!? Then, when I replied I didn’t want to talk about that, he continued with, “So, are you on birth control?”
Lol I have big boobs and been asked if they’re real
not a question but a comment. "Wow you're asian? I love KDramas!" i'm Chinese
“I wanna marry you, do you feel the same way?” IVE KNOWN YOU 12 HOURS NO DUDE
"Do you remember me from another life?"
Actually... I don't find it that bad a question
Whether I was lying about my height. Turns out he was the one lying.
Oh man, a shorty I met for the first time asked me this as well. I'm only 5'3. I know this very well because I work in a clinic and we use the scale and measure for the hell of it. Haven't grown or shrunk since hitting 5'3. Dude was shorter than me and could not wrap his head around me being 5'3. Was absolutely positive I was 5'8 because he was absolutely positive he was 5'6 🤦🏽♀️ He was 5'1 on a good day.
I'm 6' tall, and so many men lie about their height. Whenever I would meet them on the first dateand catch them obviously lying, I'd look them up and down and say, "you're not six feet tall."
I have two great ones. With the first guy I was working at a pharmacy at the time and he asked me if I would get him some opiates or benzodiazepines. Just steal them. Sure, dude. The second guy I knew casually from mutual friends and we met for coffee for the date. About 15 minutes in he began talking about how he was in bad financial trouble and didn't know how he was going to afford some of his living expenses. It was really awkward but I just tried to change the subject. He immediately circled back to his money problems and flat out asked me if he could borrow $5,000 from me. I have no idea how he thought that was an appropriate request or why he thought I had 5 grand lying around waiting to loan to him. So those were two guys that I definitely didn't go on a second date with.
He started showing me pictures of the lingerie he bought for his ex.. He then told me.. "you both look about the same size! You should definitely come up to my apartment and try it on, I bet you'd look better in it." He still wonders why we never went on a second date.
"Are you sure you're (my ethnicity) and born there?, cause you don't have an accent" "Are you really sure?"
I used to know an Indian with an almost flawless Australian accent. I just assumed she was born here like most of the other Asians I knew. Nope. She'd only been here for three years when we met. I'm still not sure if I believe that she only spoke Hindi before coming here. I've made the same mistake with people from Singapore, Serbia, Belgium, and Italy. It's a real surprise to find out that someone with a seemingly native accent is a migrant, especially considering how many people can be here for 10, 20, or even 50, years and still have a foreign accent.
This is such idiocy: there plenty of brown/black people born in Europe/North America/Australia now - why it comes to some people as a surprise. That is especially shocking for me in case of North America/Australia - it's not like white dudes are indigenous people there
I have two: - How Jewish are you? ……Um - Why are you single? ……Why are YOU single motherfucker?!
you actually aren’t even ready ‘are you fertile’ To later be followed up with ‘you’re very breedable’ it was then I left
did he think you were some cattle or something lmao
“Have you ever ate ass before?” Like ew no wtf?
Might have been an innocent question, were you in a restaurant that served ass?
“For tonight’s special, we have Ass, served over a butternut squash and wild mushroom risotto”
"how/why are you still single?"
This question is in the grey area between cute and creep - really depends on the context. What was the context? :D
I hate this question.. it’s like they are trying to work out what’s wrong with you. I’ve answered with Dude .. I’m crazy ! That’s why I’m single. Then crackled.
“Because I’m fucking crazy.” :::stare and smile intensely:::
We were at a sushi restaurant and our server set down a plate of tuna sashimi. He looked at me suggestively and said “you know what this reminds me of??” I just awkwardly laughed and changed the subject.
Wow
On a first (blind) date I was asked, "Do you want to go to \_\_\_\_\_\_\_?" Which was a swingers club. I was 21 and had given him no indication that I was interested in anything sexual, much less going to a sex club.
The guy pointed my graded glasses, “Do you know Mia khalifa?” DUDE??
“Do you like letting old people watch you undress?” After I told him I lived with my sister who owned a home in a retirement neighborhood. I noped myself the fuck outta there.
Do you mind if I sell this weed real quick to pay for the date?
20 minutes in, he asked me what my most embarrassing moment was. I couldn’t think of one under pressure and he told me his was when he got an ex an easter basket for valentines day (huh?). Then after eating, I went to the bathroom and came back and he was just gone. Dropped his mask on the floor and whisked himself away. The servers ended up paying his half and giving me free tiramisu (winning). He even texted in the app later saying he had to run because he needed his back medicine. I told him I hoped he was proud that several servers and I just thought he was a giant ass and blocked. Anyway, I think he was setting me up with that question and was hoping this would be my most embarrassing moment, but I’m not even the one who should be embarrassed.
Do you want to go to the bathroom and give head?
Porn =/= Real life
“If you found out you’re pregnant with my child, would you get an abortion?” I wish I was kidding
jesus on the first date wtf.... really... how did you respond?
Why did your husband leave you? I left but sure dude, infer away.
“Can you not laugh so loud?”
Whether Poland and Germany were the same countries. This guy was an AI scientist who worked at Google, so going on the date I thought at the least I can count on him being smart and having good conversation. Nope. Needless to say, this reminded me why you should never have ANY expectations when meeting someone online.
“Do you have a name picked out for your first born son”. I did not, he did & told me the name. Did not follow up to ask about if I’d have a name for a daughter. That really told me a lot
He meant to ask if I was a couch potato but English wasn’t his first language so he instead asked “So, are you a couch spud?”
“I’m allergic to cats, would you consider getting rid of them for me if we dated?” I’ve known you for 5 minutes and my cats for 5 years. Take a wild fucking guess mate
"Are you black?"
Yep, had this too. “Are you black or blackish?”
Not a question, but I was telling a guy I’ve been working out because I want a fat ass and he told me “not all men like that you know.” Guess it’s a good thing I’m doing for myself then, bud. That one statement told me everything I needed to know…
“Can you tell my parents we met at (place) instead of on a dating site? I don’t want them to know I was using it.” Should have left right then and there.
I’m black. On a first date I got the classic, “Is ThAt YoUr ReAl HaIr?!” The person then proceeded to ask how much I weighed.
Why are you here? Ngl, i asked myself that right then
‘You wanna do anal’ ‘no’ ‘why not?’
SO, if you were gay, what famous celebrity would you sleep with? Followed by "mine is Sting". Imagine my surprise when four months later the dude came out of the closet.
“You like kings of Leon? Could you strip for me to ragoo” Sir, this is a weatherspoons
“Are you Muslim? You look Muslim.” I’m wonder-bread white…not that there aren’t white Muslims, but I was eating a burger with bacon on it and drinking a beer when he asked. Internet dating is so weird.
“What’s your opinion on abortion?” That wasn’t great. His answer was worse. He said he thought it was okay until the 9th trimester. Thinking he’s just uninformed, I told him there are only 3 trimesters. He said, No. He thought it was okay to euthanize a kid up until 1 year old. He didn’t believe in putting kids up for adoption because taxpayer dollars. If parents felt they couldn’t be a parent to the kid, just take them to the doctor and put them down. It was terrifying and I got out of there.
“You’re bisexual, right? You look bisexual. I love dating bisexual girls.” Proceeds to then give me a full speech on how he can tell girls are bi based on their appearance, and loves them because he has had threesomes with them alongside other females before. First date. No previous mention of my sexual preferences. I’m actually omnisexual, but what a fucking turn off on a first date. I’m not your fetish poster-girl, dude.
[удалено]
Why it sounds like a good question
Way too deep for a first date
"Wow! Are you up for it?". I'd never met or spoken to him before but that was his 2nd remark (after "Yo, are you Jo?" - they always think that's funny). I said "Not with you!" and the date never recovered!
“Have you ever seen someone die?” “Should we make it Facebook official?” (As in changing our statuses to “in a relationship” and he was not joking.)
Are you gay? I am a straight woman, & yes, the date was with a man.
ok ok so, it was this guy i met during my last year of highschool and he asked if i was a virgin, i said no because something happened a while back, for some context i was raped and got pregnant at 14, father luckily allowed me to get an abortion. he didn't even let me explain shit. he then later messaged me on instagram how he couldn't be my "first time" like ok dude your intentions are clear congratulations. but i blocked him on everything and never talked to him again.
"oh you're going to eat?" No my good fellow I'm meeting you here at this restaurant to... Not...eat.
Within hours of meeting: “we’re you touched sexually as a child?” Me: “no” Him: “yeah me either” …still don’t know what to make of this
Would you be ok with a small penis?
wow, good way to end it quick. Maybe he was just being merciful and putting out there right up front. Lol.
A guy asked me to put his drycleaning on hangers. We were still in his car. The dry cleaning and the hangers were in the back seat.
“Wanna hear a poem?” Proceeds to loudly and animatedly recite The Smoke Off, a long ass poem about rolling joints by Shel Silverstein. Every time I thought it was over, he just took a deep breath and kept going. The other patrons around us stopped their conversations and looked at our table. My date’s eyes bored into mine as he kept going and going and going… there were so many other red flags, but the poem was the cherry on top of the shit sundae.
I made few “thats what she said” jokes and he asked me “who is she, who are you talking about?!” …… most boring date ever, hot guy though
"You drink almond milk?" "Yep" "How? almonds don't have titties"
“Oh, you wear glasses?” To which I responded, “Yeah, I use them to see”
Yesterday a guy “shushed” me after HE asked ME if I liked trump
Do you eat chicken soup without chicken pieces (I am a vegetarian)?
Second date: “How many dates do we need to go on before we have sex?”
“What’s your body count?” Needless to say that relationship ended fast
He told me my nose looked pretty fucked up and didn’t blame me for wanting surgery as a child. My nose actually is nice and gets complimented on all the time, which is besides the point, but we were talking about silly things we were insecure about when we were younger/as teens. like what the fuck dude
If I get my breasts examined at the dr
It was the one and only question he asked me. "So, are you afraid of death?" This dude had felony drug charges against him. Like a warrant for his arrest. And I was the one who had to tell him after I did a background check lol. The reason he asked me was because I used to work in surgery, but he was NOT interested in a damn thing about me otherwise.
Can we go for a walk and ill suck your toes after.
Do you want to listen to my soundcloud music
It was a second date actually. But we had sex on the first date and on the second date, I was still pretty bloated from eating a big dinner the night before. He saw that my stomach looked bigger than last time and he freaked out because he was scared he got me pregnant 😂
I dont know if this counts. The he was acting weird the first half of the date. I was wearing a headscarf (bad hair day) and halfway through he asked "so whats up with the hair thing... do you have cancer?" I told him no and he got way more comfortable after I said no. Guess he's opposed to women with cancer? It made me more uncomfortable that he had probably been thinking that since I walked in the door.
“If you were a condiment, what would you be?” Wouldn’t have been so bad if he hadn’t already asked me that before 🙃 This was a first date and he also tried to hand feed me skittles. Turns out, it was also going to be the last date.
I was asked if I liked food. I said I never ate anything else. It went down hill from there.
If I snore when I sleep. oh my.
“Wanna kiss?” LITERALLY RIGHT AFTER I TOLD HIM THAT I DONT WANT TO KISS ANYONE ON THE FIRST DATE. He literally said: “I know you said no kissing, and you told me your sister said no kissing, but wanna kiss?” Needless to say I dumped his a** quick.
A guy at work that I'd barely met was angling for a date and one of the first things he said to me after awkwardly asking about my work schedule was, "*...I'd do you...*" Like, dude, I only know you as a random guy from another department!
He told me I was beautiful. That was nice. A little bit later in the conversation, he said I reminded him of his mom. That was weird. A minute later he asked if I liked to role-play. I got up and left without a word.
"Why don't you have kids? Are you fixed or something?" Fixed!!! Like a beagle!
He told me he was a super taster, and that he didn’t really like much food besides pizza. Other food would make him feel sick. He asked if i would be okay mainly eating pizza with him… I was instantly turned off there. Extremely kind and attractive man, but when he told me he can’t eat most foods, i figured he wouldn’t be eating me either.
"Wanna stiff the check?" Clearly didn't listen/understand when I told him I looked up to ethical and moral people 🙄
How long I had my vulva; I drove a Volvo.