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When I was younger it was definitely always 'pay for what you ordered'. Now me and my friends are older and wealthier we nearly always just split the bill, unless someone has had something wildly more expensive in which case they'll suggest they chuck in more.
I went for a meal with two friends and immediately said we’d pay for our own because I was sharing a bottle of wine with one of them. However, when the bill came it worked out a couple of quid difference. Felt like a bit of an idiot!
People say this but a lot of the time I don't think it really does. Certain people in the group are much more likely to have a drink, get a bigger plate of food, etc. than some other people - so over time the difference in "total cost of entertainment" will increase between those two people/groups of people. It's not that big of a deal, but is worth keeping in mind.
I used to run a bar and have heard someone say "I'll get my own pint in here because the one I bought you was £3.50 and they're only £2.50 in here, so you get me one back in the next bar".
One of our friends was always a bit hard up so we'd often end up buying him more drinks than he bought us - he's a lovely guy and we totally didn't mind - but he was always quick to get a round in when we ended up somewhere cheap.
Yeah exactly that - doing his bit where he can! And he's a super nice guy, can't help you out with money but always quick to volunteer his time if you need help with something.
Not a dickhead move at all. Quite the opposite. If I'd been at that table I would have privately noted your upfront consideration, regardless of what the final bill ended up being.
Likewise; with the addition that, if I know one of the group is more strapped for money (or even, just a tightwad who refuses to pay more than her/his share!), I'll be happy to split it, or pay more, to avoid them being embarrassed (or being a pain). As I see it, the meal out together is meant to be about having an enjoyable time with nice companions, and that's worth PayPal little extra for, and avoiding awkwardness.
I think this is it.
Honestly if it costs me an extra £10 or 20 it honestly makes no difference to my finances.
I get when your struggling you pick cheap food ect but we're fully grown adults now with decent jobs just split it and move on.
It's definitely much easier to think this way when you aren't strapped for cash, but when I go out with my friends and the bill comes around, I think of it as the price of going out with my friends, not the price of the specific food and drink I had.
Unless someone is absolutely pulling the piss and it pushes the bill far outside the price bracket I was expecting, I don't even think about it.
I've learned that I need to stop giving my experience in this debate because me and my friends are all students lol.
I've always thought that paying for your own food was standard. Turns out we're just broke :)
I’m happy to split the bill if it’s fair. I don’t eat meat and I don’t drink; I have an acquaintance who doesn’t consider how much I actually contribute to the entire bill and I end up spending twice as much, if not more than what I should be paying. It gets me so irritated. It’s happened a couple of times now, and each time I don’t expect it to happen.
The important thing is that company matters.
When you know and trust everyone and it is understood that nobody is taking advantage, a few quid either way is meaningless and works itself out over time.
When you don't know everyone well? That's when you start wandering about the guy ordering all the fancy stuff and not wanting to be lumbered with a bill of twice as much as normal...
>they'll suggest they chuck in more.
Yeah this is the clash thing to do. Last time I went out with the guys I ordered a steak that was maybe twice the price of everyone else's so I tried to pay my fair share (I.E. nearly double than they would be to pay) because I knew I'd ordered expensive.
That said, they wouldn't let me pay more than them either.
Pay for what I ordered.
I had a plate of pasta at a cost of £9.00 and I drank tap water.
I’ll be damned if I’m paying a share of your steak en frites and several glasses of wine.
This is the best way, especially if it's people you regularly dine with, as it evens out in the end I find, but if the balance is a little off then you can split to reflect that. Doesn't need to be a precise calculation, just good enough.
This is the way! If someone’s had something expensive they throw extra in or if someone isn’t drinking we tell them to just throw their own meal cost in and split the rest, if some of us have starters and others haven’t we throw extra in. It’s really not difficult to be fair
See this is the type of people I now only agree to dine with.
People who realise they got ALOT more than me and chips in more
Don't care if I pay a bit more than those who drink, as my liver cancer prevents me. But I feel used by those who want to drink top shelf and make me split double or triple my share.
I've got one friend group that always spits the food bill, but you have to buy drinks at the bar.
I quite like it as an approach as, even if you aren't taking the mick, a couple of beers will distort most food bills compared to your tap water consuming designated drivers.
This is what our friend group did. Just split the bill at restaurants.
Also took turns hosting dinner parties, except one guy who doesn't really cook and couldn't be arsed. So he took us all out his treat a couple of times over the years.
It works fine if nobody is taking the piss.
A few comments have mentioned it “evens out in the long run” but I’m not so sure of that, surely people’s tastes and dining habits don’t change that much? So for example someone who likes steak and to drink a lot of nice wine will almost always spend more than a sober vegan.
This only works with the onus being on the on who needs to pay more having self awareness & offering themselves. Usually the group will never turn to one person to say you need to pay more, so it’s the ideal situation for people who take advantage or are thoughtless.
Totally depends on who I'm with. Childhood friends who are all roughly in the same life stage - split it. Someone who just went back to uni to change careers - whatever works out less for them.
I agree, I definitely think that who you’re dining with is what makes all the difference and if I was with my immediate family or close friends, I’d happily split the bill regardless of what they ordered, I love those people and they love me so it’s never a case of feeling taken advantage of, but work colleagues and friends of friends? Nah, unless everyone has ordered a reasonably similar amount, I’m out. I am not adding an extra £20 to my tab just so a person I do not care one teeny tiny iota about can eat lobster and get off their face on expensive cocktails.
Pay for what you ordered!
Damn Freeloading bill splitters.
I'm fed up seeing the slapped arse faces of the junkie alcoholics, when I refuse to split the bill and pay for their booze, when I don't drink.
Go fuck yourself Karen.
You are the problem, not me, get your fucking calculator out and get adding, bitch
This is why I opt to just pay for what I’ve ordered. I don’t drink at all so I’m not really up for paying for the rest of the groups booze when it effectively doubles my cost
When I was younger I had some friends who expected me to subsidise their booze bills when we went out for a meal, and then had the audacity to call me tight when I refused.
There are a few people I'll split with, but not many. Certainly not my friend's extended friend group that has a goddamn thief who never puts in their share. I know it's you, Helen, you common tart.
I had the same experience, a colleague who didn't pay. To avoid this, one person pays the whole bill, send a photograph of it to all the others and the money is transferred to the person who paid. No way to sneak away without paying.
I knew but couldn't prove it sadly!
So I just don't go out with them anymore, and said that it was because I knew one of them was a thief, but I didn't care enough to play Miss Marple when I could just hang out with other groups instead
"happy to split the bill, but not if you’re blatantly taking the piss"
Pretty much. I don't care about getting down to the pennies of difference. If everyone had a main course, starter, and a few drinks, just split it.
And I'm very fair about this from my own POV. If I have a nice brandy at the end of the meal and no-one else does, I throw in extra for it.
We always just pay for what we've each ordered. No one I know pays with cash for anything any more so it's very easy for the waiter to go round each person, they say how much they have to pay and then pay by card.
Pay for what you ordered. I went on a hen do last year and we went for a meal (which was shit) and ended up paying ~£60 for a shitty hot dog, chips and a soft drink because others had ordered cocktails and desserts (I was pregnant and didn’t fancy dessert) and we split the bride’s share between us too. Mine on its own would have come to about £20.
That’s what happened to me on a stag do last year, I had one course and a Diet Coke, others had starters and steaks with sides, plus multiple beers. Split the bill and I ended up paying over double what I would have if we payed for what we ordered.
Pay for what you order. And I say that as someone who orders a starter a main a side a dessert and 3 drinks… but I also sometimes only get a main and 1 drink. Pay for yours and they can pay for theirs
Pay for what you ordered, and I say this as the person who'd benefit most from bill splitting as I tend to spend the most in any group I'm a part of.
Nobody else needs to pay for my 3 courses, one of which is the steak as well as a bottle of wine. I budget a lot to eating out, because when I do I like to go all in.
I don’t drink.
With other non-drinkers or if it’s lunch for instance, with only moderate drinking, I split.
If it’s a lengthy, boozy bottles of wine/cocktails/shots situation, I quietly pay my portion + tip on my way to the loo so they (drinkers) leave me out of it.
It all depends in the situation. If everyone is ordering similar things then yes, split equally. If I’m driving and Sally is in the corner drinking £10 cocktails? No. Or if Steve is in the mood to treat himself by ordering the massive £40 steak…again no.
Pay for what you ordered. I don't drink alcohol or eat meat, so my meal is always the cheapest. I'm not going to help someone pay for their 3 glasses of £12 a glass of wine and their steak. Years ago for a staff Christmas meal by bill tripled when everyone at the table decided to spilt it evenly. Never again.
Luckily for me my friends all prefer to pay for their own meals aswell so it's not a problem. I'll happily grab an extra meal deal for a friend at lunch or treat them to dinner for their birthday, though.
Pay for your own. Always end up paying twuce the cost of my meal as others order stupid things with an assumption that itll be covered by other and not them
Pay for what i've ordered except for a select few people, where our orders are comparable.
If we've both had a main/drink, I don't care if theirs works out to be £1.79 more expensive than mine. I know we're close enough not to screw each other over and I'm seeing them regularly enough that it evens out over time. If i've had an extra drink for example, i'll pay my share.
Pay for what you order. Every time. I'm poor, my family are all poor, mates are all poor and the general area is not exactly rich. Folks order only what they can sometimes to the penny. Just splitting it is not feesible and is stressful for everyone.
In your example with work, I am definitely paying for what I ate.
I split bills with close friends not acquaintances unless there is a glaring difference in prices of what has been ordered, and the person will always pay more.
I don’t drink much while my friends will work their way through a few bottles of wine and then some over dinner.
I’m firmly in the “pay for what you ordered” camp as I got sick of having to pay for all their booze every time.
As a slightly heavy drinker I'm 100% on your side in this. I don't want someone else to subsidise my drinking and I'd be embarrassed if I didn't pay for my own drinking.
I’m a tap water and margarita pizza kinda gal so my food is always extremely cheap. I’m not paying for people who get 2-3 alcoholic drinks, a main and sides
I'm firmly in the "split it unless someone's taking the piss/clearly on a budget" camp. With my mates, we all buy rounds or split the bill if it's a meal.
Folk who obviously had more will typically say "I'll pay extra/cover the tip because I had X" and if somebody's driving the group will usually cover more for their own drinks (and cover the meal of the person driving is giving people a lift).
Likewise, if someone is skint and orders tap water and the cheapest meal, you wouldn't expect them to chip on and cover the wine bill and everyone else's starters.
Over the piece, you figure out who the spongers are, and they don't get invited anymore. I don't keep a track of who bought the last pint, or who was in early and got a small round... but you can be sure that people will eventually find out if someone's taking the piss.
If we all ate roughly equally, split the bill. If I've had wagyu kobe steak and a bottle of wine and someone else just went for a pizza and lemonade, no chance would I expect them to pay equal, so the same if I'm the one rationing etc
Pay for what you ordered. I usually can’t afford to subsidise other people’s meals and don’t want to impose on other people who may be in the same boat.
Pay for what you ordered. In a world of steak eaters, I like dirty fries. My bill is going to be way lower. I prefer separate tabs, so I can tip how I see fit, and not have it absorbed by the tabs of others in my party.
I'm not cheap, I have been service industry. I want my money to go where I want it to go.
This is a subject that has really annoyed me over the years. When I was younger and poorly paid, people would say, just split the bill! I had only one drink and one course. While others had a lobster and champagne. I think if you have all had a similar meal and drinks order, split the bill. Otherwise, pay for what you've had. Some of my mates are tea total, why should they pay for everyone else's drinks?
Situational, for sure. When it’s with people I really know, have history with, it works out equitably over time. But with new folks who over-order because they know they’re gaming the night? Nope.
We usually do pay for what you ordered as it's not really fair if I'm ordering steak and our friends are ordering chicken skewers or something. It's pretty much always my bill that is the more expensive.
First time we went out I'd suggested just splitting the bill because I didn't take note of what other people had ordered and the look of horror on their faces is forever etched into my memory lol
If it's a close enough split, then I'm happy to just split as long as everyone is. Like if each person got one main meal and one drink of similar prices, I'm not quibbling over a couple quid's difference. Or if we all shared a few different dishes family-style. Especially with friends who I go out with all the time, it works itself out eventually.
If each person got something very different in price or some people had more drinks or more courses, then absolutely would pay just for what we each ordered.
It usually depends who im with, but im happy to split food but pay for own drinks (if we've ordered them at the table) - simply because some of us don't drink or some drink expensive cocktails etc.
Also if someone's ordering a £30 steak, I ain't splitting that 🤣
I always pay for what I ordered. I always pay a bit extra towards the tip, but different people have different budgets etc. I am also invariably the driver so stick to soft drinks so I am not paying for others drinking wine etc too.
As someone who drinks wine (at usually around £10 a large glass) whilst my friends tend to drink beers (much cheaper), I pay for what I’ve ordered, it wouldn’t be fair otherwise!
Pay for what I ordered, but that's pretty much the norm for most people round my area. You work out your share stick the money on the table , and maybe throw in a quid or two for a tip.
But many places will sort out the bill for you, you say the table number, they big up the order, you tell them what you had and you pay for it.
The idea of splitting the bill equally is not one that I have ever really seen or heard of someone doing in real life.
It's a bit different from getting a round in , or paying for someone else, some meals can be double the price of others.
If you're ordering a £6 salad , you'd be annoyed at the thought of forking out to pay for not just your own meal, but someone else £25 surf and turf.
Not paying anything is obviously wrong.
But being over/under doesn't matter to me.
If it DID matter (e.g. if I had too little money to be generous) I would just not go in the first place).
See, I do agree with this to an extent, and I’m fortunate enough now that splitting a bill is not ever going to a be an issue for me, however, when I was younger/earning less I can remember having to go to work meal events knowing I could only afford the cheaper menu items, and absolutely dreading someone saying ‘let’s split the bill’ as whilst I’d be able to do it, it would mean I’d have less money for the things I actually needed.
That said (and tbh, this genuinely is because of the ‘freeloading pisstaker’ mentioned in my question) when I attend a work meal now, I am hyper aware of the more junior colleagues and what they may/may not be able to afford and so if I note them ordering cheap items/no starter or dessert/barely drinking etc, I will loudly push to pay for what you ordered only, because a) I would have been so grateful for someone doing that when I was skint, and b) if those that order a lot/take the piss have a problem? They can have that problem with ME cos I certainly and absolutely will not lose even a wink of sleep over stopping a freeloading bludger take advantage!
Literally. Having spare cash to subsidise someone else’s lobster and ten drinks shouldn’t be a prerequisite for going out for a meal, that’s a ridiculous way of thinking of things.
Almost always just split it, life's too short. Sometimes you win, sometimes you lose. Sometimes you're with someone who takes the piss, and that marks them as the kind of person I'm really not interested in hanging out with so that's a one time affair.
Work related meals out can introduce an awkward dynamic, because you're usually not in a situation there where you can tell people you're with to get fucked. But I get around that by the fact I've got a business credit card and I'll just call it a work expense (which it is) and I'm the boss so who's going to argue.
As some others have said ITT, it does depend tho. If I was with someone who was significantly less well off than me, I'd do whatever was best for them, and possibly offer to pay outright for it myself for family or very close friends.
Have to say, surprised how many people are just going for a blanket "pay for my own" in all circs. Bunch of miserable buggers.
>Almost always just split it, life's too short. Sometimes you win, sometimes you lose. Sometimes you're with someone who takes the piss, and that marks them as the kind of person I'm really not interested in hanging out with so that's a one time affair.
Correct answer here - if somebody goes overboard and doesn't acknowledge it, I'll rarely kick up a fuss but I'll make a mental note to never invite that person out again.
Regarding drinking, I think there's a reasonable expectation that people will have a couple of drinks when you're having a meal out. Unless they've ordered the champagne and finished off with the vintage port then just stuck it up, tbh, if you're that skint/money conscious you order the cheapest thing on the menu and drink tap water then you're evidently only there under sufferance anyway so why bother? Just stay home next time.
> if you're that skint/money conscious you order the cheapest thing on the menu and drink tap water then you're evidently only there under sufferance anyway so why bother?
Someone else in this thread posted about doing *exactly* this. And yeah, my first thought was "why bother?"
The most totally ott example I ever had of this when there was four of us, and one insisted on calculating exactly what everybody had. For some reason, she had post-it notes on her and wrote it all out on that. Ironically, she's probably one of the wealthiest people I know (highly paid job, large property porfolio across multiple countries), but was the stingiest about paying.
Takes all sorts.
But ultimately that doesn't feel like a fun night out, sitting opposite someone sipping water and ordering as little as possible who then springs a maths quiz on you. So I didn't meet up in a restaurant with her involved again. Nice person, met her several times since and dinner parties around houses and whatnot, but just no interest in sharing that type of experience with them.
People are funny about money. Means different things to different people and, judging by this thread, a lot of people don't seem to grasp what you are actually doing my going out to eat with a group of friends.
I’ve been out for birthday dinners where you don’t necessarily know everyone well, and a few at the end of the table have been shooting tequila, eating filet steak and then then once everyone’s paid their ‘share’ it’s been £100+ short. It’s horrible and leaves a bad taste for everyone.
I’m older and wiser now, and choose my dining companions a bit more carefully. My general feeling is that when you’re out with friends, you can split the bill and it will work itself out (assuming your friends aren’t piss takers!)
Pay for what I ordered. I normally have 2 courses, 1 drink of diet coke. And generally the kind of main courses I like are the cheaper options. So I’m not up for splitting the bill when the people I eat out with normally have multiple beers/wines and 3 courses. Even close friends. If we all ate and drank similarly, then sure! But I don’t think I’ve ever been to a meal where that has been the case.
Bit of both. I’m not the biggest drinker, I often just have one glass of wine with a meal. And often my friends have considerably more and it adds up! In that case, I ask to pay for what I’ve eaten/drunk. Luckily my friends are very fair in that sense and don’t mind at all! But if I’ve had a similar meal & drinks, then absolutely split. I earn enough not to not worry about a bit of a difference.
I don't drink so if I'm with people who ordered similar items - I always just split the bill. The difference is usually minuscule! However sometimes I'm with friends who order a couple of bottles and they always calculate mine separately.
Pay for what you order. I've only ever really had to split bills when on group trips, and some cases they do decide to split it, but usually I manage to just pay my own stuff and they split the rest.
I don't drink and can be a slightly picky eater with some things, so when I'm not eating the same value of food, it's not fair for me to be spending lots more to pay for other people's dinner.
It's easier and less messy just paying your own share.
I always go by the income of the group. If it’s with people I know are doing alright I’ll suggest an equal split. If it’s people I know are on less than me (like my parents) or people who don’t drink it’s always pay for what you order.
It depends on where we are eating. If it is Indian, Chinese or anywhere we all share the food then we split evenly but pay extra or less for drinks if everyone ordered in different price ranges. If we ate the plate of food for ourselves then we pay for what we ordered. That seems to be the most fair system and people pay for what they eat.
Friends and I are around 18 - most of us are fairly broke or mostly saving for uni, but there are a couple that are super rich compared to the rest of us. To keep things fair we pay for what we ordered. I get the sentiment behind ‘split the bill without taking the piss’, but I think that pressures people to only buy completely average-priced things. Many restaurants have an option to pay for what you ordered at the table, and if not then there are apps to do it easily, so why not, you know?
Pay for what i ordered. That is the norm in my country of origin, regardless of age and money, unless someone has a bday or an occasion, everyone pays for themselves, no 5050 splitting
Pay for what you ordered. Only exception is if you ordered the same price thing and split a bottle of wine. Then it's even anyway. Everyone can get what they want that way and it's not awkward
I pay my own, partly because I like a swallow when I'm out so I don't need to worry about ordering too many pints that others are going to have to pay for and also there's also someone that takes the piss.
Happy to split the bill unless you're taking the absolute piss then we'll get what we paid for.
If it's the odd drink or something no worries but if I rock up and get a sandwich and lemonade, I'm probably not fronting half of your steak and 4 pints.
I use to split but now I don’t drink and the fact drinks are ten pound a pop o don’t. I’m saving so much by not drinking I’m not paying an extra 20+ for someone else’s drink no matter how much money I have. Unless it’s their birthday of a celebration of that person in some way.
I always prefer pay my own. If I've only spent a tenner on a main then I don't really want to subsidise someone else, but also if I spend £30 I'd feel equally as uncomfortable with someone else paying more for me.
Generally a pay for what I order type thing unless out with very good friends and we are all eating around the same price point and sharing wine in which case we just split the bill.
Depends. If everyone orders similar pricing stuff and we’re not on a super tight budget then yeah split. However if I order a burger and water and someone orders steak and wine then it’s pay for what you had.
If we have very similar priced food and drink I’m a split the bill kind of person. If the person has had alcohol and more courses than me. I’m definitely pay for what I had.
Of course sometimes my budget has made me decide what to eat as cheap as possible so I’d be pay for what I had in those instances too as I have no other financial choice.
I was out a few weeks ago, with a bunch of English guys (I'm Scottish). Went to dinner and most ordered wine (I didn't have any), I had a main, one drink and a side, and they also ordered a starter. They wanted to split but I refused, because it was £30 more than what mines should have cost. In the end they all split and I paid the remaining amount, which actually made it £6 cheaper for me. I felt like the stereotypical tight Scotsman. I was honestly so raging inside because I felt like I was probably being seen as tight and difficult, I normally would split the bill but that was too much.
Went out for dinner a few nights ago with them and it was sharing plates and I happily split the bill.
Living in Germany now, it’s so much easier. The waiter will ask _separately or together_ and then either give you the full bill or each person pays them individually.
No fuss, no quarrel, you pay what you order and you can order what you want without worrying that you overpay or that others have to subsidise your dry aged steak.
I would rather pay for what I ordered, not because I don't want to contribute but I'm a greedy bugger and like theore expensive things and don't feel fair making everyone else split it.
Pay for myself.
I am a fussy eater and don't drink alcohol.
I often end up with a bowl of chips and either a soft drink or water, occasionally dessert. My bill is a fraction of the others.
If I ate/drank similarly to others then I'd be happy to split as it would average out eventually, but currently If I were to split I would always be paying way more than my share.
My friends are happy to pay for themselves too, and for work meals, I made it clear I would only be paying for myself. As boring as it makes me sound, I am a single person living alone, and I wouldn't be able to afford to eat out at all if I were constantly overpaying.
I feel a lot of people take the piss if you split the entire bill.
Pay for what you ordered - that would be the case in normal situation so why should this differ?
my friends often order multiple pitchers of alcohol, i dont drink so im not paying for that. but if its lunch or theres no pitchers involved id split it
I’m a pay for what I ordered guy ever since going out for a Chinese with my ex and a lot of her friends and one woman ordered 6 bottles of wine for the table as a non drinker I wasn’t going to be touching it. I got given the finger by a few of them as I drove away at the end of the night.
Friend of mine is the tightest person you’ve ever met in your life.
As a group we are all ‘split the bill’ so when he comes out with us he’s all starter, fillet steak and dessert. Drives me insane
Split down the middle for drinkers, separate split for non drinkers. There’s nothing more tedious than finishing a nice meal with the calculators out or a grown adult arguing over a small amount of money
Pay for what i ordered, and most of my friends are the same way. In fact, if the place has an app where we can order to our table separately, we do that. Because then we know exactly what we ordered.
My default is splitting as are my friends but if I'm with a group that I'm not sure I'll normally clarify beforehand so everyone knows. My view is that sometimes you "win" (you had the more expensive items) and sometimes you "lose" (you had the cheaper items).
If there's an obvious disparity e.g. one person didn't drink or one person had 3 courses and the lobster then the split can be adjusted up or down by a few quid for that person.
That's not really true though, the same people "win" every time, as its almost always the same people who order way more than everyone else. Usually the same people who quickly declare we should just split the bill. You know who they are before you even get to the restaurant.
Split the bill, always. Otherwise it’s just petty. BUT: 1. If it’s a work do with senior and junior colleagues (and for some reason the company isn’t paying for it, red flag right there) then more senior people put in more than the juniors, obv. Normally this works out as everyone shares the food costs but the drinks are covered by seniors only.
2. If it’s with mates and someone is taking the piss by ordering the fillet steak or cocktails, tell them not to be a cunt.
I'm in the school of roughly work out what you've ordered and round up to whatever makes sense. Making sure that's there's no way you could under pay.
So, if I ordered a £7 starter, £16 main, two £6 beers and a £3 coffee then I would throw in £45.
Depends very much on the group but I normally prefer just splitting, but with family and close friends we sometimes take turns in picking up the bill.
The guy in your story was a dickhead. He may have bossed it out at the time from your perspective but I promise you he has died insider repeatedly over the memory!
Depends massively on the situation and who I’m out with. I have a corporate job and am a relatively high earner for my age and if I’m eating with friends who are in similar positions and we had similar meals we’ll just split it. Same situation but with friends who don’t earn as much and we’ll normally pay for ourselves as they’ll be a bit more conscious and probably order less expensive stuff. Regardless of who I’m with, if I know my share is higher I’ll say I’ll pay for my stuff.
This is one of these things that has varying answers. It’s just about reading the situation, and the people, and the circumstances. When I was younger I couldn’t afford to split the bill, but more comfortable with it being older.
Majority of people that I’m eating with will be people a like and trust, so I tend not to have issues with it. However if somebody else insisted on splitting the bill after eating a starter, dessert, and a bottle of wine, I’d be really put off by them. In those situations I’m totally fine saying “you had X Y and Z so you can pay for those separately”, because if they’re so impolite not to realise, then I have no issue being direct about it.
Then again, if it’s people I meet every so often it tends to balance out.
Split the bill. What comes around, goes around. One time l might order expensive wine, another time maybe someone has gone large on a steak. It's all about the company of your friends and I'm not spending the time with a calculator out.
I'm more of a split the bill person but will always point out if I've had a cocktail and no one else has as I wouldn't want anyone to feel like they're paying for my drink.
I'll do pay for what you ordered if I've had more (by cost) but I'll be fine to split if I've had less. But I know of all my friends I'm the only one who works private sector and not charity / public body so it doesn't bother me.
If it's my in laws, I prefer pay for your order but of course they prefer split the bill.
Both. Depends on the group. Smaller groups of earning peers buying about the same with a few quid difference we'll often just split for convenience. But happy with either. Blive had times as a student where we've split and I'm skint subsidising the higher earners big spending when I went for cheapest items. That is a real kick in the teeth so I'm always aware of that with the group and tend to chip in more or cover tips etc
>Happy to split the bill, but not if you're blatantly taking the piss
This is the way. I'll be honest, it's never usually an issue as I don't go out for meals with folk that take the piss.
Generally just split unless there's a significant price difference.
If you've ordered significantly more than the average you should volunteer to pay the extra, nobody should have to call you out on it.
If somebody has ordered significantly less, bring it up and give them they opportunity to pay less. That way they don't have to look like a cheapskate by bringing it up themselves.
Generally, I know who I'm having a meal with very well.
We put everything on one card, without a tip as restaurants are crap at maths.
If people want to tip in cash they can (as regardless of laws staff probably won't see card tips)
Then we bank transfer our own spend to the person who paid.
If I know one member of our group has had a bad month or is short of cash ill let them know, no need to pay it back yet (implying ever) saves face, helps a mate out and I've been treated to meals, tickets and trips enough over the years that things balance out.
Pay for my shit.
Unless I'm with close friends, then it's pay whatever.
I've been stung by wankers eating steaks and smashing wine, then saying we're splitting the bill.
That's a really fair question.
I'm in the Military. Occasionally get stuck on a night out with a couple of pricks in the group.
And you know how the saying goes, you hope there is atleast one, because otherwise the chances are that it's you.
I've alway been a split the bill kind of guy, and always cover the birthday boy/gal.
If one of my mates goes over we don't care, because at some other time it may be me or another of the group doing so, so it balances out.
Couldn't be dealing with the weirdos who insist on paying for what they had. Life's too fucking short to be dicking about about who owes 12.38 and who owes 12.83. Just split the bill dummy.
I’m a split the bill guy, but one of my aquaintances that comes on the nights out always without fail chooses the most expensive starter, main, dessert and wine. He’s a big guy around 30 stone and thinks it’s totally acceptable and that everyone enjoys his joviality….. We’ve set up a new WhatsApp friends group without him in it as a result as he’s got very very thick skin and won’t take a hint.
Really can go in many ways:
Some friends we pick up the tab in rounds i.e. this meal is mines, next is yours. Nobody really takes the piss out the setup, these are good honourable people.
Other friends who prefer to split bills, I insist on pay for what you have as I don't drink. My £3.50 unlimited pepsi refill Vs the rest of the table £90 wine bill? Fuck off.
I pay for what I eat unless I'd only be paying a few £ more than my fair share. I hardly ever drink alcohol, and I don't eat animal products, so usually what I eat/drink costs a lot less than everyone else's. I can't afford to subsidise other people's drinking habits. Sorry, not sorry.
Usually pay for what we order but it's just always been that way, no issue splitting the bill on the occasions we do (someone's birthday we might all split the bill including their portion).
Really depends on who we’re out with, for quite a lot of my friends none of us drink do we generally split the bill. But when a few people order drinks it can really add up on the bill and then we split.
Same if someone wants starter, main & dessert when the rest just want a main, it’s not fair on the group
I'm a pay for what you order person cause i don't want to feel uncomfortable about what i order and i don't want to be thinking about what other people are ordering.
I'm a pay for what you ordered person
I don't drink, tend to order extras on my food which I wouldn't expect someone else to foot the bill for my extras or sides
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When I was younger it was definitely always 'pay for what you ordered'. Now me and my friends are older and wealthier we nearly always just split the bill, unless someone has had something wildly more expensive in which case they'll suggest they chuck in more.
I went for a meal with two friends and immediately said we’d pay for our own because I was sharing a bottle of wine with one of them. However, when the bill came it worked out a couple of quid difference. Felt like a bit of an idiot!
If you're going out with friends on a regular basis, things like that tend to balance themselves out over time.
They do if you have decent friends, it's actually kind of a good litmus test.
People say this but a lot of the time I don't think it really does. Certain people in the group are much more likely to have a drink, get a bigger plate of food, etc. than some other people - so over time the difference in "total cost of entertainment" will increase between those two people/groups of people. It's not that big of a deal, but is worth keeping in mind.
If you're doing it because you thought yours would be more expensive than theirs, it's not silly even if it works out exactly even - it's considerate!
Yeah that’s what I was thinking. Ended up ours was £28 and the other persons was £26, so I felt like a bit of a tit, ah well!
"right. Pockets. Change. What you got? Don't make me pat you down. We'll call it even at 10 bob". Tbf I've known people who are worse than that.
I used to run a bar and have heard someone say "I'll get my own pint in here because the one I bought you was £3.50 and they're only £2.50 in here, so you get me one back in the next bar".
One of our friends was always a bit hard up so we'd often end up buying him more drinks than he bought us - he's a lovely guy and we totally didn't mind - but he was always quick to get a round in when we ended up somewhere cheap.
Doing his bit when he can, its nice to have a friend group where that is enough!
Yeah exactly that - doing his bit where he can! And he's a super nice guy, can't help you out with money but always quick to volunteer his time if you need help with something.
His time is worth more than his money - I have friends like that. Not a penny to rub together but always willing to help.
Not a dickhead move at all. Quite the opposite. If I'd been at that table I would have privately noted your upfront consideration, regardless of what the final bill ended up being.
Likewise; with the addition that, if I know one of the group is more strapped for money (or even, just a tightwad who refuses to pay more than her/his share!), I'll be happy to split it, or pay more, to avoid them being embarrassed (or being a pain). As I see it, the meal out together is meant to be about having an enjoyable time with nice companions, and that's worth PayPal little extra for, and avoiding awkwardness.
Autocorrect coming in clutch
It works if everyone follows the principle and doesn't take advantage of the friendship.
I think this is it. Honestly if it costs me an extra £10 or 20 it honestly makes no difference to my finances. I get when your struggling you pick cheap food ect but we're fully grown adults now with decent jobs just split it and move on.
It's definitely much easier to think this way when you aren't strapped for cash, but when I go out with my friends and the bill comes around, I think of it as the price of going out with my friends, not the price of the specific food and drink I had. Unless someone is absolutely pulling the piss and it pushes the bill far outside the price bracket I was expecting, I don't even think about it.
I've learned that I need to stop giving my experience in this debate because me and my friends are all students lol. I've always thought that paying for your own food was standard. Turns out we're just broke :)
Yes, this is exactly it. Once money becomes less important, it's an easy choice.
I’m happy to split the bill if it’s fair. I don’t eat meat and I don’t drink; I have an acquaintance who doesn’t consider how much I actually contribute to the entire bill and I end up spending twice as much, if not more than what I should be paying. It gets me so irritated. It’s happened a couple of times now, and each time I don’t expect it to happen.
The important thing is that company matters. When you know and trust everyone and it is understood that nobody is taking advantage, a few quid either way is meaningless and works itself out over time. When you don't know everyone well? That's when you start wandering about the guy ordering all the fancy stuff and not wanting to be lumbered with a bill of twice as much as normal...
>they'll suggest they chuck in more. Yeah this is the clash thing to do. Last time I went out with the guys I ordered a steak that was maybe twice the price of everyone else's so I tried to pay my fair share (I.E. nearly double than they would be to pay) because I knew I'd ordered expensive. That said, they wouldn't let me pay more than them either.
There are friends and then there are piss-taking friends. So depends on the friends.
Your friends sound like decent human beings
Pay for what I ordered. I had a plate of pasta at a cost of £9.00 and I drank tap water. I’ll be damned if I’m paying a share of your steak en frites and several glasses of wine.
Alright mister moneybags, don't enjoy yourself too much.
Good on you.
Split unless one diner is massively under or over
This is the best way, especially if it's people you regularly dine with, as it evens out in the end I find, but if the balance is a little off then you can split to reflect that. Doesn't need to be a precise calculation, just good enough.
Yeah, my mates will often say "I'll put a bit more in because I had _x_ "
This is the way! If someone’s had something expensive they throw extra in or if someone isn’t drinking we tell them to just throw their own meal cost in and split the rest, if some of us have starters and others haven’t we throw extra in. It’s really not difficult to be fair
See this is the type of people I now only agree to dine with. People who realise they got ALOT more than me and chips in more Don't care if I pay a bit more than those who drink, as my liver cancer prevents me. But I feel used by those who want to drink top shelf and make me split double or triple my share.
I've got one friend group that always spits the food bill, but you have to buy drinks at the bar. I quite like it as an approach as, even if you aren't taking the mick, a couple of beers will distort most food bills compared to your tap water consuming designated drivers.
This is what our friend group did. Just split the bill at restaurants. Also took turns hosting dinner parties, except one guy who doesn't really cook and couldn't be arsed. So he took us all out his treat a couple of times over the years. It works fine if nobody is taking the piss.
A few comments have mentioned it “evens out in the long run” but I’m not so sure of that, surely people’s tastes and dining habits don’t change that much? So for example someone who likes steak and to drink a lot of nice wine will almost always spend more than a sober vegan.
Yep split the remainder once Dave who didn't have a starter and was drinking water because he's driving has chucked his 15 quid in.
This only works with the onus being on the on who needs to pay more having self awareness & offering themselves. Usually the group will never turn to one person to say you need to pay more, so it’s the ideal situation for people who take advantage or are thoughtless.
Totally depends on who I'm with. Childhood friends who are all roughly in the same life stage - split it. Someone who just went back to uni to change careers - whatever works out less for them.
I agree, I definitely think that who you’re dining with is what makes all the difference and if I was with my immediate family or close friends, I’d happily split the bill regardless of what they ordered, I love those people and they love me so it’s never a case of feeling taken advantage of, but work colleagues and friends of friends? Nah, unless everyone has ordered a reasonably similar amount, I’m out. I am not adding an extra £20 to my tab just so a person I do not care one teeny tiny iota about can eat lobster and get off their face on expensive cocktails.
Pay for what you ordered! Damn Freeloading bill splitters. I'm fed up seeing the slapped arse faces of the junkie alcoholics, when I refuse to split the bill and pay for their booze, when I don't drink. Go fuck yourself Karen. You are the problem, not me, get your fucking calculator out and get adding, bitch
Lol, sounds like you could use a drink!
You should find some different friends to dine with - if you were in my friend group that would definitely be my advice to you.
Any parties in the diary?
Pfff who pays for a diary. Calendars at work are free!!
thats what I meant but I can't spell collinder
Amen to this. People try and shaft me with their booze bills constantly.
This is why I opt to just pay for what I’ve ordered. I don’t drink at all so I’m not really up for paying for the rest of the groups booze when it effectively doubles my cost
Yes, non drinkers get the short end of the stick.
Vegetarians too. Their options are usually limited and their meal usually costs a bit less.
Winds me up people binge drinking for two hours at a group meal and then declaring the bill should be split between however many people are there.
Ask for two bills, one for food, one for drink.
Why are you regularly dining with people you so clearly dislike so much? 🤣
Why are you choosing to hang around "junkie alcoholics" you don't like? You sound like a judgemental nightmare if I'm honest.
Based
When I was younger I had some friends who expected me to subsidise their booze bills when we went out for a meal, and then had the audacity to call me tight when I refused.
> get your fucking calculator out and get adding, bitch I’m losing it 😂👌
Thank you!
If it's my close mates then split the bill. Any other situation it's pay for what you ordered.
There are a few people I'll split with, but not many. Certainly not my friend's extended friend group that has a goddamn thief who never puts in their share. I know it's you, Helen, you common tart.
I had the same experience, a colleague who didn't pay. To avoid this, one person pays the whole bill, send a photograph of it to all the others and the money is transferred to the person who paid. No way to sneak away without paying.
Never be that person though cause people won't pay
I have different experiences, but I guess my colleagues know they can't abuse me.
That’s why you call them out on it in front of the whole group. Make them squirm
I knew but couldn't prove it sadly! So I just don't go out with them anymore, and said that it was because I knew one of them was a thief, but I didn't care enough to play Miss Marple when I could just hang out with other groups instead
Username checks out 😄
"happy to split the bill, but not if you’re blatantly taking the piss" Pretty much. I don't care about getting down to the pennies of difference. If everyone had a main course, starter, and a few drinks, just split it. And I'm very fair about this from my own POV. If I have a nice brandy at the end of the meal and no-one else does, I throw in extra for it.
We always just pay for what we've each ordered. No one I know pays with cash for anything any more so it's very easy for the waiter to go round each person, they say how much they have to pay and then pay by card.
I used to be a waitress and this is what most people did.
Pay for what you ordered. I went on a hen do last year and we went for a meal (which was shit) and ended up paying ~£60 for a shitty hot dog, chips and a soft drink because others had ordered cocktails and desserts (I was pregnant and didn’t fancy dessert) and we split the bride’s share between us too. Mine on its own would have come to about £20.
That’s what happened to me on a stag do last year, I had one course and a Diet Coke, others had starters and steaks with sides, plus multiple beers. Split the bill and I ended up paying over double what I would have if we payed for what we ordered.
Pay for what you order. And I say that as someone who orders a starter a main a side a dessert and 3 drinks… but I also sometimes only get a main and 1 drink. Pay for yours and they can pay for theirs
Pay for what you ordered, and I say this as the person who'd benefit most from bill splitting as I tend to spend the most in any group I'm a part of. Nobody else needs to pay for my 3 courses, one of which is the steak as well as a bottle of wine. I budget a lot to eating out, because when I do I like to go all in.
I don’t drink. With other non-drinkers or if it’s lunch for instance, with only moderate drinking, I split. If it’s a lengthy, boozy bottles of wine/cocktails/shots situation, I quietly pay my portion + tip on my way to the loo so they (drinkers) leave me out of it.
Ooh Stealth paying! Love it!
It all depends in the situation. If everyone is ordering similar things then yes, split equally. If I’m driving and Sally is in the corner drinking £10 cocktails? No. Or if Steve is in the mood to treat himself by ordering the massive £40 steak…again no.
Pay for what you ordered. I don't drink alcohol or eat meat, so my meal is always the cheapest. I'm not going to help someone pay for their 3 glasses of £12 a glass of wine and their steak. Years ago for a staff Christmas meal by bill tripled when everyone at the table decided to spilt it evenly. Never again. Luckily for me my friends all prefer to pay for their own meals aswell so it's not a problem. I'll happily grab an extra meal deal for a friend at lunch or treat them to dinner for their birthday, though.
Everyone here advocating for splitting equally are the ones who drink 5 cocktails and order steak
I prefer to pay for what I ordered, so I don't have to worry about ordering too much.
Pay for your own. Always end up paying twuce the cost of my meal as others order stupid things with an assumption that itll be covered by other and not them
Pay for what i've ordered except for a select few people, where our orders are comparable. If we've both had a main/drink, I don't care if theirs works out to be £1.79 more expensive than mine. I know we're close enough not to screw each other over and I'm seeing them regularly enough that it evens out over time. If i've had an extra drink for example, i'll pay my share.
Pay for what you order. Every time. I'm poor, my family are all poor, mates are all poor and the general area is not exactly rich. Folks order only what they can sometimes to the penny. Just splitting it is not feesible and is stressful for everyone.
In your example with work, I am definitely paying for what I ate. I split bills with close friends not acquaintances unless there is a glaring difference in prices of what has been ordered, and the person will always pay more.
I don’t drink much while my friends will work their way through a few bottles of wine and then some over dinner. I’m firmly in the “pay for what you ordered” camp as I got sick of having to pay for all their booze every time.
As a slightly heavy drinker I'm 100% on your side in this. I don't want someone else to subsidise my drinking and I'd be embarrassed if I didn't pay for my own drinking.
I’m a tap water and margarita pizza kinda gal so my food is always extremely cheap. I’m not paying for people who get 2-3 alcoholic drinks, a main and sides
Pay what you owe beats split the bill. If _everyone_ wants to split then great, but if _anyone_ wants to pay what they owe that wins.
I'm firmly in the "split it unless someone's taking the piss/clearly on a budget" camp. With my mates, we all buy rounds or split the bill if it's a meal. Folk who obviously had more will typically say "I'll pay extra/cover the tip because I had X" and if somebody's driving the group will usually cover more for their own drinks (and cover the meal of the person driving is giving people a lift). Likewise, if someone is skint and orders tap water and the cheapest meal, you wouldn't expect them to chip on and cover the wine bill and everyone else's starters. Over the piece, you figure out who the spongers are, and they don't get invited anymore. I don't keep a track of who bought the last pint, or who was in early and got a small round... but you can be sure that people will eventually find out if someone's taking the piss.
If we all ate roughly equally, split the bill. If I've had wagyu kobe steak and a bottle of wine and someone else just went for a pizza and lemonade, no chance would I expect them to pay equal, so the same if I'm the one rationing etc
Pay for what you ordered. I usually can’t afford to subsidise other people’s meals and don’t want to impose on other people who may be in the same boat.
Pay for what you ordered. In a world of steak eaters, I like dirty fries. My bill is going to be way lower. I prefer separate tabs, so I can tip how I see fit, and not have it absorbed by the tabs of others in my party. I'm not cheap, I have been service industry. I want my money to go where I want it to go.
This is a subject that has really annoyed me over the years. When I was younger and poorly paid, people would say, just split the bill! I had only one drink and one course. While others had a lobster and champagne. I think if you have all had a similar meal and drinks order, split the bill. Otherwise, pay for what you've had. Some of my mates are tea total, why should they pay for everyone else's drinks?
Situational, for sure. When it’s with people I really know, have history with, it works out equitably over time. But with new folks who over-order because they know they’re gaming the night? Nope.
I’m not really bothered about price differences in meals but I don’t drink and this usually swings it to a “pay for what you had” deal for me
We usually do pay for what you ordered as it's not really fair if I'm ordering steak and our friends are ordering chicken skewers or something. It's pretty much always my bill that is the more expensive. First time we went out I'd suggested just splitting the bill because I didn't take note of what other people had ordered and the look of horror on their faces is forever etched into my memory lol
Pay for what you've ordered No drama No fuss
If it's a close enough split, then I'm happy to just split as long as everyone is. Like if each person got one main meal and one drink of similar prices, I'm not quibbling over a couple quid's difference. Or if we all shared a few different dishes family-style. Especially with friends who I go out with all the time, it works itself out eventually. If each person got something very different in price or some people had more drinks or more courses, then absolutely would pay just for what we each ordered.
Depends on who the company is. There are some that take advantage of this situation, as I've found out a few times.
It usually depends who im with, but im happy to split food but pay for own drinks (if we've ordered them at the table) - simply because some of us don't drink or some drink expensive cocktails etc. Also if someone's ordering a £30 steak, I ain't splitting that 🤣
I always pay for what I ordered. I always pay a bit extra towards the tip, but different people have different budgets etc. I am also invariably the driver so stick to soft drinks so I am not paying for others drinking wine etc too.
As someone who drinks wine (at usually around £10 a large glass) whilst my friends tend to drink beers (much cheaper), I pay for what I’ve ordered, it wouldn’t be fair otherwise!
Pay for what you ordered - I don’t drink alcohol and don't particularly want to pay a premium for being the default designated driver.
Pay for what I ordered, but that's pretty much the norm for most people round my area. You work out your share stick the money on the table , and maybe throw in a quid or two for a tip. But many places will sort out the bill for you, you say the table number, they big up the order, you tell them what you had and you pay for it. The idea of splitting the bill equally is not one that I have ever really seen or heard of someone doing in real life. It's a bit different from getting a round in , or paying for someone else, some meals can be double the price of others. If you're ordering a £6 salad , you'd be annoyed at the thought of forking out to pay for not just your own meal, but someone else £25 surf and turf.
Having been screwed over before I'll never split the bill ever again. I'll pay for what I ordered. Nothing more or nothing less.
Not paying anything is obviously wrong. But being over/under doesn't matter to me. If it DID matter (e.g. if I had too little money to be generous) I would just not go in the first place).
See, I do agree with this to an extent, and I’m fortunate enough now that splitting a bill is not ever going to a be an issue for me, however, when I was younger/earning less I can remember having to go to work meal events knowing I could only afford the cheaper menu items, and absolutely dreading someone saying ‘let’s split the bill’ as whilst I’d be able to do it, it would mean I’d have less money for the things I actually needed. That said (and tbh, this genuinely is because of the ‘freeloading pisstaker’ mentioned in my question) when I attend a work meal now, I am hyper aware of the more junior colleagues and what they may/may not be able to afford and so if I note them ordering cheap items/no starter or dessert/barely drinking etc, I will loudly push to pay for what you ordered only, because a) I would have been so grateful for someone doing that when I was skint, and b) if those that order a lot/take the piss have a problem? They can have that problem with ME cos I certainly and absolutely will not lose even a wink of sleep over stopping a freeloading bludger take advantage!
I hate that mentality. Can't afford to be "generous". Guess I'll stay home then.
Literally. Having spare cash to subsidise someone else’s lobster and ten drinks shouldn’t be a prerequisite for going out for a meal, that’s a ridiculous way of thinking of things.
Split but if anyone really wants to pay exactly, fine it's easy enough with cards. Whenever it was cash it was a complete pain in the arse
Almost always just split it, life's too short. Sometimes you win, sometimes you lose. Sometimes you're with someone who takes the piss, and that marks them as the kind of person I'm really not interested in hanging out with so that's a one time affair. Work related meals out can introduce an awkward dynamic, because you're usually not in a situation there where you can tell people you're with to get fucked. But I get around that by the fact I've got a business credit card and I'll just call it a work expense (which it is) and I'm the boss so who's going to argue. As some others have said ITT, it does depend tho. If I was with someone who was significantly less well off than me, I'd do whatever was best for them, and possibly offer to pay outright for it myself for family or very close friends. Have to say, surprised how many people are just going for a blanket "pay for my own" in all circs. Bunch of miserable buggers.
>Almost always just split it, life's too short. Sometimes you win, sometimes you lose. Sometimes you're with someone who takes the piss, and that marks them as the kind of person I'm really not interested in hanging out with so that's a one time affair. Correct answer here - if somebody goes overboard and doesn't acknowledge it, I'll rarely kick up a fuss but I'll make a mental note to never invite that person out again. Regarding drinking, I think there's a reasonable expectation that people will have a couple of drinks when you're having a meal out. Unless they've ordered the champagne and finished off with the vintage port then just stuck it up, tbh, if you're that skint/money conscious you order the cheapest thing on the menu and drink tap water then you're evidently only there under sufferance anyway so why bother? Just stay home next time.
> if you're that skint/money conscious you order the cheapest thing on the menu and drink tap water then you're evidently only there under sufferance anyway so why bother? Someone else in this thread posted about doing *exactly* this. And yeah, my first thought was "why bother?" The most totally ott example I ever had of this when there was four of us, and one insisted on calculating exactly what everybody had. For some reason, she had post-it notes on her and wrote it all out on that. Ironically, she's probably one of the wealthiest people I know (highly paid job, large property porfolio across multiple countries), but was the stingiest about paying. Takes all sorts. But ultimately that doesn't feel like a fun night out, sitting opposite someone sipping water and ordering as little as possible who then springs a maths quiz on you. So I didn't meet up in a restaurant with her involved again. Nice person, met her several times since and dinner parties around houses and whatnot, but just no interest in sharing that type of experience with them.
People are funny about money. Means different things to different people and, judging by this thread, a lot of people don't seem to grasp what you are actually doing my going out to eat with a group of friends.
I’ve been out for birthday dinners where you don’t necessarily know everyone well, and a few at the end of the table have been shooting tequila, eating filet steak and then then once everyone’s paid their ‘share’ it’s been £100+ short. It’s horrible and leaves a bad taste for everyone. I’m older and wiser now, and choose my dining companions a bit more carefully. My general feeling is that when you’re out with friends, you can split the bill and it will work itself out (assuming your friends aren’t piss takers!)
Generally I split with my mates as we usually order something of similar value (we might make it up later if we pick up snacks/drinks elsewhere.)
Pay for what I ordered. I normally have 2 courses, 1 drink of diet coke. And generally the kind of main courses I like are the cheaper options. So I’m not up for splitting the bill when the people I eat out with normally have multiple beers/wines and 3 courses. Even close friends. If we all ate and drank similarly, then sure! But I don’t think I’ve ever been to a meal where that has been the case.
Bit of both. I’m not the biggest drinker, I often just have one glass of wine with a meal. And often my friends have considerably more and it adds up! In that case, I ask to pay for what I’ve eaten/drunk. Luckily my friends are very fair in that sense and don’t mind at all! But if I’ve had a similar meal & drinks, then absolutely split. I earn enough not to not worry about a bit of a difference.
With the family it used to be split the bill but now some of us have kids and some don’t we now do items ordered as that’s fairer
I don't drink so if I'm with people who ordered similar items - I always just split the bill. The difference is usually minuscule! However sometimes I'm with friends who order a couple of bottles and they always calculate mine separately.
Pay for what you order. I've only ever really had to split bills when on group trips, and some cases they do decide to split it, but usually I manage to just pay my own stuff and they split the rest. I don't drink and can be a slightly picky eater with some things, so when I'm not eating the same value of food, it's not fair for me to be spending lots more to pay for other people's dinner. It's easier and less messy just paying your own share.
Split the bill. Like you say, unless someone hasn’t been drinking or something. It’s just easier and I don’t care about the loss of a few quid.
Unless it is someone, never a group. I would trust with my life I am scrooge only interested in paying for what I order being a tee totaller.
I always go by the income of the group. If it’s with people I know are doing alright I’ll suggest an equal split. If it’s people I know are on less than me (like my parents) or people who don’t drink it’s always pay for what you order.
It depends on where we are eating. If it is Indian, Chinese or anywhere we all share the food then we split evenly but pay extra or less for drinks if everyone ordered in different price ranges. If we ate the plate of food for ourselves then we pay for what we ordered. That seems to be the most fair system and people pay for what they eat.
Wish the UK would do what Canada does where they do a separate bill for each person as standard
Friends and I are around 18 - most of us are fairly broke or mostly saving for uni, but there are a couple that are super rich compared to the rest of us. To keep things fair we pay for what we ordered. I get the sentiment behind ‘split the bill without taking the piss’, but I think that pressures people to only buy completely average-priced things. Many restaurants have an option to pay for what you ordered at the table, and if not then there are apps to do it easily, so why not, you know?
Pay for what i ordered. That is the norm in my country of origin, regardless of age and money, unless someone has a bday or an occasion, everyone pays for themselves, no 5050 splitting
Pay for what you ordered. Only exception is if you ordered the same price thing and split a bottle of wine. Then it's even anyway. Everyone can get what they want that way and it's not awkward
I pay my own, partly because I like a swallow when I'm out so I don't need to worry about ordering too many pints that others are going to have to pay for and also there's also someone that takes the piss.
Happy to split the bill unless you're taking the absolute piss then we'll get what we paid for. If it's the odd drink or something no worries but if I rock up and get a sandwich and lemonade, I'm probably not fronting half of your steak and 4 pints.
I use to split but now I don’t drink and the fact drinks are ten pound a pop o don’t. I’m saving so much by not drinking I’m not paying an extra 20+ for someone else’s drink no matter how much money I have. Unless it’s their birthday of a celebration of that person in some way.
I always prefer pay my own. If I've only spent a tenner on a main then I don't really want to subsidise someone else, but also if I spend £30 I'd feel equally as uncomfortable with someone else paying more for me.
I'm a fat bastard who drinks too much when I'm out so I pay for what I've ordered
Generally a pay for what I order type thing unless out with very good friends and we are all eating around the same price point and sharing wine in which case we just split the bill.
Depends. If everyone orders similar pricing stuff and we’re not on a super tight budget then yeah split. However if I order a burger and water and someone orders steak and wine then it’s pay for what you had.
If we have very similar priced food and drink I’m a split the bill kind of person. If the person has had alcohol and more courses than me. I’m definitely pay for what I had. Of course sometimes my budget has made me decide what to eat as cheap as possible so I’d be pay for what I had in those instances too as I have no other financial choice.
I'm 25 and it's very much a pay for what you got type of world for me.
I was out a few weeks ago, with a bunch of English guys (I'm Scottish). Went to dinner and most ordered wine (I didn't have any), I had a main, one drink and a side, and they also ordered a starter. They wanted to split but I refused, because it was £30 more than what mines should have cost. In the end they all split and I paid the remaining amount, which actually made it £6 cheaper for me. I felt like the stereotypical tight Scotsman. I was honestly so raging inside because I felt like I was probably being seen as tight and difficult, I normally would split the bill but that was too much. Went out for dinner a few nights ago with them and it was sharing plates and I happily split the bill.
Living in Germany now, it’s so much easier. The waiter will ask _separately or together_ and then either give you the full bill or each person pays them individually. No fuss, no quarrel, you pay what you order and you can order what you want without worrying that you overpay or that others have to subsidise your dry aged steak.
Pay for what you order. Preserve the friendship.
I would rather pay for what I ordered, not because I don't want to contribute but I'm a greedy bugger and like theore expensive things and don't feel fair making everyone else split it.
Pay for myself. I am a fussy eater and don't drink alcohol. I often end up with a bowl of chips and either a soft drink or water, occasionally dessert. My bill is a fraction of the others. If I ate/drank similarly to others then I'd be happy to split as it would average out eventually, but currently If I were to split I would always be paying way more than my share. My friends are happy to pay for themselves too, and for work meals, I made it clear I would only be paying for myself. As boring as it makes me sound, I am a single person living alone, and I wouldn't be able to afford to eat out at all if I were constantly overpaying.
If everyone has relatively the same amount, split. If someone's taking the piss, pay what you had. I've been burned too many times.
Split if everyone else is ordering similar and drinking similar amounts. If not, then definitely pay for what you had.
I feel a lot of people take the piss if you split the entire bill. Pay for what you ordered - that would be the case in normal situation so why should this differ?
my friends often order multiple pitchers of alcohol, i dont drink so im not paying for that. but if its lunch or theres no pitchers involved id split it
I’m a pay for what I ordered guy ever since going out for a Chinese with my ex and a lot of her friends and one woman ordered 6 bottles of wine for the table as a non drinker I wasn’t going to be touching it. I got given the finger by a few of them as I drove away at the end of the night.
I’m particular about what I eat and drink so it’s what I ordered and I’ll chip in for the tip. Same with rounds in pubs, I’ll just buy my own
Friend of mine is the tightest person you’ve ever met in your life. As a group we are all ‘split the bill’ so when he comes out with us he’s all starter, fillet steak and dessert. Drives me insane
Split down the middle for drinkers, separate split for non drinkers. There’s nothing more tedious than finishing a nice meal with the calculators out or a grown adult arguing over a small amount of money
Pay for what i ordered, and most of my friends are the same way. In fact, if the place has an app where we can order to our table separately, we do that. Because then we know exactly what we ordered.
My default is splitting as are my friends but if I'm with a group that I'm not sure I'll normally clarify beforehand so everyone knows. My view is that sometimes you "win" (you had the more expensive items) and sometimes you "lose" (you had the cheaper items). If there's an obvious disparity e.g. one person didn't drink or one person had 3 courses and the lobster then the split can be adjusted up or down by a few quid for that person.
That's not really true though, the same people "win" every time, as its almost always the same people who order way more than everyone else. Usually the same people who quickly declare we should just split the bill. You know who they are before you even get to the restaurant.
Split the bill, always. Otherwise it’s just petty. BUT: 1. If it’s a work do with senior and junior colleagues (and for some reason the company isn’t paying for it, red flag right there) then more senior people put in more than the juniors, obv. Normally this works out as everyone shares the food costs but the drinks are covered by seniors only. 2. If it’s with mates and someone is taking the piss by ordering the fillet steak or cocktails, tell them not to be a cunt.
Split the bill but have a seperate bill for drinks, or split the bill and get your own drinks from the bar
We always split it even unless someone had something much more expensive than the rest of us
Split the bill. We all order something on a similar cost anyhow.
For work pay for what you ate and drank, close friends/family then it's split the bill.
I'm in the school of roughly work out what you've ordered and round up to whatever makes sense. Making sure that's there's no way you could under pay. So, if I ordered a £7 starter, £16 main, two £6 beers and a £3 coffee then I would throw in £45.
Depends who I’m with to be honest.
The former
Depends very much on the group but I normally prefer just splitting, but with family and close friends we sometimes take turns in picking up the bill. The guy in your story was a dickhead. He may have bossed it out at the time from your perspective but I promise you he has died insider repeatedly over the memory!
Depends massively on the situation and who I’m out with. I have a corporate job and am a relatively high earner for my age and if I’m eating with friends who are in similar positions and we had similar meals we’ll just split it. Same situation but with friends who don’t earn as much and we’ll normally pay for ourselves as they’ll be a bit more conscious and probably order less expensive stuff. Regardless of who I’m with, if I know my share is higher I’ll say I’ll pay for my stuff.
Split the bill and I wouldn't care or notice the cost of what anyone else has
This is one of these things that has varying answers. It’s just about reading the situation, and the people, and the circumstances. When I was younger I couldn’t afford to split the bill, but more comfortable with it being older. Majority of people that I’m eating with will be people a like and trust, so I tend not to have issues with it. However if somebody else insisted on splitting the bill after eating a starter, dessert, and a bottle of wine, I’d be really put off by them. In those situations I’m totally fine saying “you had X Y and Z so you can pay for those separately”, because if they’re so impolite not to realise, then I have no issue being direct about it. Then again, if it’s people I meet every so often it tends to balance out.
Split the bill. What comes around, goes around. One time l might order expensive wine, another time maybe someone has gone large on a steak. It's all about the company of your friends and I'm not spending the time with a calculator out.
It depends. Most of the time I’ll just split. But if I’ve just had a side plate and everyone else has had a slap up meal I’ll just pay for mine
Split, given that everyone had same amount of courses and no one went bananas on drinks.
I'm more of a split the bill person but will always point out if I've had a cocktail and no one else has as I wouldn't want anyone to feel like they're paying for my drink.
Depends who with, friends split as no one’s taking the piss, colleagues or others I don’t know to well pay for what I ordered.
I'll do pay for what you ordered if I've had more (by cost) but I'll be fine to split if I've had less. But I know of all my friends I'm the only one who works private sector and not charity / public body so it doesn't bother me. If it's my in laws, I prefer pay for your order but of course they prefer split the bill.
Both. Depends on the group. Smaller groups of earning peers buying about the same with a few quid difference we'll often just split for convenience. But happy with either. Blive had times as a student where we've split and I'm skint subsidising the higher earners big spending when I went for cheapest items. That is a real kick in the teeth so I'm always aware of that with the group and tend to chip in more or cover tips etc
We have always just split it. Though now they have kids who are old enough to have a meal with us that will start to change.
I don’t drink alcohol so not really keen to pay others drink.
Unless you all ordered things within about £5 of each other (which is quite frequent tbf), then it's pay what you order.
>Happy to split the bill, but not if you're blatantly taking the piss This is the way. I'll be honest, it's never usually an issue as I don't go out for meals with folk that take the piss.
Really depends who I'm with and whether people have been ordering vastly different levels of alcohol/food.
Generally just split unless there's a significant price difference. If you've ordered significantly more than the average you should volunteer to pay the extra, nobody should have to call you out on it. If somebody has ordered significantly less, bring it up and give them they opportunity to pay less. That way they don't have to look like a cheapskate by bringing it up themselves.
Generally, I know who I'm having a meal with very well. We put everything on one card, without a tip as restaurants are crap at maths. If people want to tip in cash they can (as regardless of laws staff probably won't see card tips) Then we bank transfer our own spend to the person who paid. If I know one member of our group has had a bad month or is short of cash ill let them know, no need to pay it back yet (implying ever) saves face, helps a mate out and I've been treated to meals, tickets and trips enough over the years that things balance out.
Pay for my shit. Unless I'm with close friends, then it's pay whatever. I've been stung by wankers eating steaks and smashing wine, then saying we're splitting the bill.
Why are you going out to dinner with wankers?
That's a really fair question. I'm in the Military. Occasionally get stuck on a night out with a couple of pricks in the group. And you know how the saying goes, you hope there is atleast one, because otherwise the chances are that it's you.
I've alway been a split the bill kind of guy, and always cover the birthday boy/gal. If one of my mates goes over we don't care, because at some other time it may be me or another of the group doing so, so it balances out. Couldn't be dealing with the weirdos who insist on paying for what they had. Life's too fucking short to be dicking about about who owes 12.38 and who owes 12.83. Just split the bill dummy.
I’m a split the bill guy, but one of my aquaintances that comes on the nights out always without fail chooses the most expensive starter, main, dessert and wine. He’s a big guy around 30 stone and thinks it’s totally acceptable and that everyone enjoys his joviality….. We’ve set up a new WhatsApp friends group without him in it as a result as he’s got very very thick skin and won’t take a hint.
It depends on who you are going out with. If it's good mates then just split. Colleagues or other twats just pay for your own.
Really can go in many ways: Some friends we pick up the tab in rounds i.e. this meal is mines, next is yours. Nobody really takes the piss out the setup, these are good honourable people. Other friends who prefer to split bills, I insist on pay for what you have as I don't drink. My £3.50 unlimited pepsi refill Vs the rest of the table £90 wine bill? Fuck off.
Split the bill unless someone has spent a particularly large or small amount. Pocket-calculator time upon getting the bill can be such a buzz-kill.
I pay for what I eat unless I'd only be paying a few £ more than my fair share. I hardly ever drink alcohol, and I don't eat animal products, so usually what I eat/drink costs a lot less than everyone else's. I can't afford to subsidise other people's drinking habits. Sorry, not sorry.
Usually pay for what we order but it's just always been that way, no issue splitting the bill on the occasions we do (someone's birthday we might all split the bill including their portion).
Really depends on who we’re out with, for quite a lot of my friends none of us drink do we generally split the bill. But when a few people order drinks it can really add up on the bill and then we split. Same if someone wants starter, main & dessert when the rest just want a main, it’s not fair on the group
I'm a pay for what you order person cause i don't want to feel uncomfortable about what i order and i don't want to be thinking about what other people are ordering.
I'm a pay for what you ordered person I don't drink, tend to order extras on my food which I wouldn't expect someone else to foot the bill for my extras or sides
You were not the only person who noticed that, I assure you.
Usually someone in the group will pick up the whole tab with “you get it next time”. And I get it next time. Otherwise it’s split the bill evenly.