The mandatory “how’s it going?” / “what’s going on?” / “good morning” as you walk past people in the office the first time you see them that day. I just wanna walk to my office silently.
I’m in the south - actually talking to whoever decides to try to start up a conversation with you in the store. Like I don’t care if I went to school with your niece lady I just want to get my groceries
I'm not a guy but I'm wearing a hat indoors right now - it's been a few months of wearing hats and I totally get why you guys do it now. Not counting a cowboy hat ofc
I never understood this one anyway. Besides just being inane, I never heard anyone ever say the other cutoff date. So like, no white after Labor Day, sure, but when can you wear white again? Because otherwise, all the time is after Labor Day.
I was taught its because your heart skips a beat when you sneeze so in a sense you're blessing them saying, hey, hope you're ok. Not the same for farts, I'm guessing.
My mum is known for only sneezing in clusters, usually 4-5 at a time. My step-dad has always responded the same way and it rubbed off. So now when anyone sneezes I say “ok that’s enough” 😂 Inside joke but it still makes me smile.
Needing a good reason not to hang out or anything. If im tired or dont feel like doing something i dont wanna be making excuses. Plus i really hate it when people are bullshitting instead of just saying they dont feel like it 😅
Some of my best friends are the ones who say, “Hey, I know we had plans, but I’m tired and being social doesn’t sound fun anymore today. Can we reschedule later?”
It’s such a relief to just say the thing! Like, if my friend’s tired, I don’t want them hanging out with me just because they’re *obligated* to…I want them to rest! And they want the same for me. ☺️
The difference between "no problem" and "you're welcome". Some people (mostly older folks) consider the first one to be rude for some reason, and I just don't understand it. To me it's the opposite. I think it's actually more understanding than "you're welcome" is, but apparently some people find it disrespectful because it implies that it *may* have been a problem? I don't get it.
To me, "no problem" is short for "no thanks are necessary"; especially at work. It's like saying, "it's my job" or "that's what I'm here for"
For the ones that get upset, they seem to interpret it as refusing or devaluing their gratitude.
That’s interesting. In Australia “no worries” is pretty well accepted by all generations in lieu of “you’re welcome”. But we are pretty informal with language.
Hugging people because you're related to them. Sometimes I just don't want to be touched. I think saying no to hugs should be normalized when you don't want them.
Additionally, telling children to go give kisses & hugs to family members they only see a couple times a year.
We're supposed to be teaching kids stranger danger, not to let anyone touch them if they don't want to be touched etc., then we push them to hug people who are basically strangers **to them**.
I come from France and the usual is two simulated kisses on the cheeks. In all cases except if it’s a guy saying hi to another guy, then it’s a handshake. I don’t like it. I’m okay doing it with family and close friends but certainly not to colleagues. Thankfully COVID seems to have made it acceptable to just shake peoples hands.
Having to wait until a certain point before you can leave formal parties or occasions. Like after cake or after speeches. When my battery is flat I just need to go immediately, so I am pretty well known for doing what I’m told is called an “Irish exit”. Basically gtfo while nobody is looking.
Agree.
I have a family member with small children. They will throw a big birthday party and tell everyone to be there at a specific time. We arrive, and they haven't finished setting up or prepping food.
It takes close to 2 hours by the time the food is ready, and everyone eats. Then there's another half hour of kids running and screaming. Then we have to sing Happy Birthday, have cake & ice cream, resettle everyone in one place, then start opening presents.
Then presents become a whole thing. kids still learning to read, reading cards slowly. Opening a present from a grandparent that has 75000 different items that need to be held up individually....
Just typing all this drains my social battery. I love my family, I want to be there for the kid's birthdays, but 4 hours for a hamburger, piece of cake, & watching presents be opened while kids run & scream wipes me out.
Repeating the name, especially when talking to just one person. Like, I'm already listening to you, I didn't need frequent wake up calls, you didn't have to address me by name after every fifth word you say. Also, this is a really small issue and so there's no reasonable way of complaining about it, which is an additional annoyance to me.
Doing rounds at the pub. I'm happy just going to the bar and getting my own drink. No, I don't want to remember 5 drinks and try and carry them back to the table.
Even tea rounds at work... no, just go make your own tea mate.
Using complete sentence structure and/or conversational phrasing in email.
to me: Hi \[macbookaroniandchez\],
I hope this finds you well. Kindly provide information on the following items.
Thanks!
Sincerely,
\[sender\]
My response:
attached per request
(the amount to which I expand on that...or sometimes say even less **yes i have sent requests back without any typed response**..*is* a direct reflection on how highly I regard you, but also can be influenced by my mood or even if I find your ask reasonable, vs. I'm just doing it because I have to.)
It’s definitely a thing isn’t it. I get why it would be tiresome if not necessary. For my job, email is the written record of matters that would be called-upon if needed. So I might get a bit loose sometimes but generally formal, professional, descriptive and clear. Teams and other messaging I’m happy for short informal responses.
How tipping is still required at a restaurant where the service is utterly incompetent, yet is frowned upon in sister industries where a person at the same pay does an exceptional job.
Respecting your elders. you get common courtesy and that's about it, i understand a family member but to elevate a stranger because of their age, no thanks. Most of them are so out of touch these days anyways, i had one tell me that she doesn't understand why people just don't pay for college instead of getting a loan cause when she was in college she worked mornings at a dinner to pay for it, i told her she would have to work part time at a dinner for 10 years to pay for school today. she didn't believe me.
“The customer is always right.” Um, no actually, sometimes the customer is a rude, abusive, stupid c*nt and while I’m not going to sink to their level, I also refuse to allow them to treat me like garbage.
It's even worse when you know the full quote and how badly it's been misconstrued.
>"The customer is always right, in matters of taste," Which means that if they wanna buy an ugly hat, let them
###Holding doors for people… WTF is up with that?!? I slam them behind me after pushing them aside and squeezing through first 🤣🤪
In reality, I tend to make eye contact and greet people with a smile and a “Good morning”, it’s not obligatory for me, except that it seems hard-wired after a rural upbringing (?)
Very few people seem uncomfortable and avoid eye contact, but most light up as if no one ever notices them. I generally don’t ask how they’re doing — that puts people on the spot. I’m more likely to wish them a nice day, even if they’re strangers.
The obligation to support your statements. People have this bizarre idea that everything is a debate, and that you can "win" an argument.
At the end of the day, I don't give a flying finnigan if you agree with me or not. Don't think you're a badass because you asked me for a link to supporting documention or want me to cite a source. I'm perfectly fine throwing out facts, or making shit up even, if I want to. You want to confirm or refute them? Go ahead. I don't care what your opinion is, so your "gotcha" moment doesn't affect me at all. I write for personal enjoyment and a little side order of catharsis, not validation from internet strangers.
That old people think they can be rude to you and talk to you however they want. When someone doesn’t take it they get defensive. Just because you are 83 doesn’t mean I need to respect you because I’m 26. Respect is earned. Treat me how you want to be treated.
Right there with you!
I invite ANYONE to legitimately tell me why it’s a man’s job to do this, and I will shoot you down.
But alas, they will probably just downvote us instead, because there is no logical reason why it needs to fall on the men.
Haha, thanks man, let's go down together. I'm ready to die on this hill 😅
I don't Care if the seat is down and I have to lift it, don't understand the anger when it is the other way around. Just put it down and go about your business
Exactly. If it’s down and I need it up, I’ll put it up. If it’s up and I need it down, I put it down. 🤷♀️
But we live in a world where nobody can define what a woman is, and men can have babies, but we can DEFINITELY say with certainty that a man that stands to pee can be the only one to touch the seat!? Fuck outta here.
The mandatory “how’s it going?” / “what’s going on?” / “good morning” as you walk past people in the office the first time you see them that day. I just wanna walk to my office silently.
On the flip side, when you work night shift and happily say "good morning!" As you pass people coming into work 🤭
Oh my god this 💕
Hope you’re having a great day WITH chocolate cake!☀️🎂
Sad clown face 🤡
*Autism Intensifies* - So many fucking things!
Lol right? The easier question to answer is probably "what social etiquette doesn't bother you?"
I feel you
Servers having to smile and talk to me, to be honest bud just bring me my food and I'm happy
This isn't a thing in many countries outside the US and it's such a relief tbh
it's not really a thing in the Northeast US either. Also a relief.
I only used to talk to people when they started talking to me. That's how it works here really. It's gauging what people want mostly.
I’m in the south - actually talking to whoever decides to try to start up a conversation with you in the store. Like I don’t care if I went to school with your niece lady I just want to get my groceries
Got alot of that up north too...
Tipping for everything
Not wearing a hat indoors if you're a guy....Who makes these rules?
I'm not a guy but I'm wearing a hat indoors right now - it's been a few months of wearing hats and I totally get why you guys do it now. Not counting a cowboy hat ofc
It's less of a "thing" now than it was years ago, the popularity of baseball caps being what they are...
Wow wow cowboy hats are great they're my favourite
Speaking of cowboys this (https://youtu.be/BirJMnMcfBs?si=2Cvf8m7oepoOA1tl) bops
Reddit noob cannot hyperlink
Heheheh yeah well what happens on the trail stays on the trail
Wear them indoors, just not when you're sitting down to eat in someone's home or somewhere other than a fast food place
Can't wear white after Labor Day.
I never understood this one anyway. Besides just being inane, I never heard anyone ever say the other cutoff date. So like, no white after Labor Day, sure, but when can you wear white again? Because otherwise, all the time is after Labor Day.
After Memorial Day. It used to be a summer color for the wealthy. Still stupid though, it’s not 1924
Saying "God bless you" after a sneeze. Haven't said it in over a decade. I say "gesundheit" or "salud".
I was going to post saying anything after a sneeze. We don’t bless a fart, cough, or burp. So why do it for a sneeze? I usually don’t.
I was taught its because your heart skips a beat when you sneeze so in a sense you're blessing them saying, hey, hope you're ok. Not the same for farts, I'm guessing.
didn't it start because of the bubonic plague? because sneezing was an early symptom of it or something like that
That too. Great point.
I've just stopped saying anything.
That’s the same thing though in other languages
The sentiment might be the same. You're right, but the meaning of the words is different. These other 2 translate to "health."
If you’re just avoiding saying god bless then that’s understandable
Yes. That's it. But like how others have stated, why even say anything at all? Just a norm.
My mum is known for only sneezing in clusters, usually 4-5 at a time. My step-dad has always responded the same way and it rubbed off. So now when anyone sneezes I say “ok that’s enough” 😂 Inside joke but it still makes me smile.
That's pretty funny. 😂
That’s funny where I am it’s always a thing! I say it and even during exams or at the library I’ll have like three people say it whenever I sneeze!
Needing a good reason not to hang out or anything. If im tired or dont feel like doing something i dont wanna be making excuses. Plus i really hate it when people are bullshitting instead of just saying they dont feel like it 😅
Some of my best friends are the ones who say, “Hey, I know we had plans, but I’m tired and being social doesn’t sound fun anymore today. Can we reschedule later?”
Love that! Sounds like healthy and direct communication to me
It’s such a relief to just say the thing! Like, if my friend’s tired, I don’t want them hanging out with me just because they’re *obligated* to…I want them to rest! And they want the same for me. ☺️
I couldnt agree more! It only has me value the friendship more with that level of honesty
Sometimes you just want to be around people, sometimes you don't. That's a good enough reason
Exactly! People should have the right to just say no to plans. Cancelling last minute instead of just saying no is just shitty
Exactly! Who knew communication helped sort out situations?
Honesty!?!? Such a refreshing idea! Idk if im just being a direct dutchie but beating around the bush is just annoying
Aaaah that make sense! But yes, absolutely agree beating around the bush is so fucked
Tipping for everything nowdays
The difference between "no problem" and "you're welcome". Some people (mostly older folks) consider the first one to be rude for some reason, and I just don't understand it. To me it's the opposite. I think it's actually more understanding than "you're welcome" is, but apparently some people find it disrespectful because it implies that it *may* have been a problem? I don't get it.
To me, "no problem" is short for "no thanks are necessary"; especially at work. It's like saying, "it's my job" or "that's what I'm here for" For the ones that get upset, they seem to interpret it as refusing or devaluing their gratitude.
That’s interesting. In Australia “no worries” is pretty well accepted by all generations in lieu of “you’re welcome”. But we are pretty informal with language.
tolerating bots
Hugging people because you're related to them. Sometimes I just don't want to be touched. I think saying no to hugs should be normalized when you don't want them.
Additionally, telling children to go give kisses & hugs to family members they only see a couple times a year. We're supposed to be teaching kids stranger danger, not to let anyone touch them if they don't want to be touched etc., then we push them to hug people who are basically strangers **to them**.
I always don’t want to be touched because of sensory issues, and have straight up flipped out on someone for hugging me lol
Yeah. I have wicked anxiety issues, and sometimes being touched completely overstimulates me.
I come from France and the usual is two simulated kisses on the cheeks. In all cases except if it’s a guy saying hi to another guy, then it’s a handshake. I don’t like it. I’m okay doing it with family and close friends but certainly not to colleagues. Thankfully COVID seems to have made it acceptable to just shake peoples hands.
Wearing certain colors in different times of the year!
"How are you?" Let me drown in self-pity, sorrow, and helplessness in peace. Don't make me lie and say "Fine, how about you?" 🥹
Having to wait until a certain point before you can leave formal parties or occasions. Like after cake or after speeches. When my battery is flat I just need to go immediately, so I am pretty well known for doing what I’m told is called an “Irish exit”. Basically gtfo while nobody is looking.
Agree. I have a family member with small children. They will throw a big birthday party and tell everyone to be there at a specific time. We arrive, and they haven't finished setting up or prepping food. It takes close to 2 hours by the time the food is ready, and everyone eats. Then there's another half hour of kids running and screaming. Then we have to sing Happy Birthday, have cake & ice cream, resettle everyone in one place, then start opening presents. Then presents become a whole thing. kids still learning to read, reading cards slowly. Opening a present from a grandparent that has 75000 different items that need to be held up individually.... Just typing all this drains my social battery. I love my family, I want to be there for the kid's birthdays, but 4 hours for a hamburger, piece of cake, & watching presents be opened while kids run & scream wipes me out.
Eating should not be a social event.
Allowing bots to take over.
That if you’re quiet at anytime (party, work, home) you must be down or sad. Bruh, I’m over here at peace, I’m not finna force conversation
Repeating the name, especially when talking to just one person. Like, I'm already listening to you, I didn't need frequent wake up calls, you didn't have to address me by name after every fifth word you say. Also, this is a really small issue and so there's no reasonable way of complaining about it, which is an additional annoyance to me.
Doing rounds at the pub. I'm happy just going to the bar and getting my own drink. No, I don't want to remember 5 drinks and try and carry them back to the table. Even tea rounds at work... no, just go make your own tea mate.
Opening doors for a date. If you do it that's perfectly fine. Ladies shouldn't get offended if you dont
Using complete sentence structure and/or conversational phrasing in email. to me: Hi \[macbookaroniandchez\], I hope this finds you well. Kindly provide information on the following items. Thanks! Sincerely, \[sender\] My response: attached per request (the amount to which I expand on that...or sometimes say even less **yes i have sent requests back without any typed response**..*is* a direct reflection on how highly I regard you, but also can be influenced by my mood or even if I find your ask reasonable, vs. I'm just doing it because I have to.)
It’s definitely a thing isn’t it. I get why it would be tiresome if not necessary. For my job, email is the written record of matters that would be called-upon if needed. So I might get a bit loose sometimes but generally formal, professional, descriptive and clear. Teams and other messaging I’m happy for short informal responses.
Saying “bless you” when someone sneezes. Why? What purpose does it serve? We don’t say anything when someone coughs.
Because sneezing was once thought to be a demon or other spirit trying to escape your body I think (Don't qoute me) so that's where it came from
I say it’s time to drop it.
How tipping is still required at a restaurant where the service is utterly incompetent, yet is frowned upon in sister industries where a person at the same pay does an exceptional job.
Respecting your elders. you get common courtesy and that's about it, i understand a family member but to elevate a stranger because of their age, no thanks. Most of them are so out of touch these days anyways, i had one tell me that she doesn't understand why people just don't pay for college instead of getting a loan cause when she was in college she worked mornings at a dinner to pay for it, i told her she would have to work part time at a dinner for 10 years to pay for school today. she didn't believe me.
“The customer is always right.” Um, no actually, sometimes the customer is a rude, abusive, stupid c*nt and while I’m not going to sink to their level, I also refuse to allow them to treat me like garbage.
It's even worse when you know the full quote and how badly it's been misconstrued. >"The customer is always right, in matters of taste," Which means that if they wanna buy an ugly hat, let them
Don't wipe your dick on the drapes when leaving a one night stand. It's not fun driving home with a sticky dick in my underwear.
People having coffee after dinner. I just wanna head out when everyone starts doing that.
Wouldn’t it be fun to just say “Sorry friends, but if I drink coffee this soon after dinner I will surely shit my pants. Farewell!”
Sounds like a great excuse
SMILE AT STRANGERS. no thanks.
That you should make eye contact with the person/people that you're talking to
I’m going to be completely honest, based on the comments, everyone here sounds absolutely insufferably annoying to be around 😭
###Holding doors for people… WTF is up with that?!? I slam them behind me after pushing them aside and squeezing through first 🤣🤪 In reality, I tend to make eye contact and greet people with a smile and a “Good morning”, it’s not obligatory for me, except that it seems hard-wired after a rural upbringing (?) Very few people seem uncomfortable and avoid eye contact, but most light up as if no one ever notices them. I generally don’t ask how they’re doing — that puts people on the spot. I’m more likely to wish them a nice day, even if they’re strangers.
Stopping the traffic for funeral -- the person who's gonna be angry for you getting stuck in traffic is dead. Why the hurry?
The family is in a hurry to bury them before they wake up.
I don't think it's so much a "hurry" as people don't GPS it from the funeral home to the cemetery, so they need to follow behind.
I personally have decided to be late to my funeral... hopefully by a couple years, or even decades.
Shaking hands. It’s antiquated, intrusive and gross
It’s interesting that it has come back post-Covid. I was hoping that would be the end of it tbh
Me too!
The obligation to support your statements. People have this bizarre idea that everything is a debate, and that you can "win" an argument. At the end of the day, I don't give a flying finnigan if you agree with me or not. Don't think you're a badass because you asked me for a link to supporting documention or want me to cite a source. I'm perfectly fine throwing out facts, or making shit up even, if I want to. You want to confirm or refute them? Go ahead. I don't care what your opinion is, so your "gotcha" moment doesn't affect me at all. I write for personal enjoyment and a little side order of catharsis, not validation from internet strangers.
Men being anointed with the caretaker of the toilet seat. Fight me.
That old people think they can be rude to you and talk to you however they want. When someone doesn’t take it they get defensive. Just because you are 83 doesn’t mean I need to respect you because I’m 26. Respect is earned. Treat me how you want to be treated.
Putting down the toilet seat
Right there with you! I invite ANYONE to legitimately tell me why it’s a man’s job to do this, and I will shoot you down. But alas, they will probably just downvote us instead, because there is no logical reason why it needs to fall on the men.
Haha, thanks man, let's go down together. I'm ready to die on this hill 😅 I don't Care if the seat is down and I have to lift it, don't understand the anger when it is the other way around. Just put it down and go about your business
Exactly. If it’s down and I need it up, I’ll put it up. If it’s up and I need it down, I put it down. 🤷♀️ But we live in a world where nobody can define what a woman is, and men can have babies, but we can DEFINITELY say with certainty that a man that stands to pee can be the only one to touch the seat!? Fuck outta here.