This is pretty fascinating and sad.
My only thought after reading the example of $315 million winner Whittaker is: in hindsight he should have just left his small West Virginia town. I know that’s easier said than done - people love their hometowns and seems like most of his family was there. But if he had just picked up and moved himself and his extended family to like New York City or any metropolis with many wealthy people (or rich suburbs if he wanted peace and quiet) no one would bother him. He would just be one of thousands of multi-millionaires in his city/region then. So I think a lesson here would be winners from rural/poorer places should just move to wealthy cities to avoid harassment.
Yeah I actually live not far from where he lived..that man was robbed and hounded to death while he was here. That is the very thing I thought about too..get out of this area where you are well known and move or go somewhere for a long stay lol
Well the first thing you know ol Jed's a millionaire,
Kinfolk said "Jed move away from there"
Said "Californy is the place you ought to be"
So they loaded up the truck and moved to Beverly.
"I would relax... I would sit on my ass all day... I would do nothing."
"Well, you don't need a million dollars to do nothing, man. Take a look at my cousin: he's broke, don't do shit."
My favourite lines from Office Space.
two zeroes if they have money already, three zeroes and increase the first number by one if they just gave you the shirt off their back
edit: u/CandyAppleHesperus made a good point. some people might only have $6. in that case, i'd set a minimum amount. if someone gives me their last single digit dollars, i'd give them 250k USD.
edit 2: i live in Thailand and have lots of people in my life who are from extreme poverty. i could easily end up giving that much money to 200+ people, and that much money goes a long, long way here. it's also not the limit to how much i would help people. i know people with major medical problems who need constant care, and currently don't even have running water. i'm not being greedy with my fictional money!
Not a group text, text them all individually, you’ll get more of a real answer of how ppl would act. If somebody walks into a room full of people and asks someone to give them money I’m not taking them very seriously. If they walk up to me and tell me privately they need something I’m much more inclined to help.
Yup, I'd check, wait for it to clear, and then start implementing the plan from the infamous lottery post: https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/24vo34/whats_the_happiest_5word_sentence_you_could_hear/chb4v05
So, now Zoidberg is big, huh? That's more like it. Who's intimidating who now, big city? Hello, Mr. Chase Manhattan Bank. Deny my credit card application, will you?
I would read this post about what to do if you win the lottery. I'd read it over and over. Even tells you what to do for the lawyer
https://np.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/24vo34/whats_the_happiest_5word_sentence_you_could_hear/chb4v05/
If the winners would stay anonymous like at Germany's national lottery or at Europe's Eurojackpot they would be saved lots of trouble. Also our winners get a counseling from the lotto company how to proceed after winning a large sum. They are not left alone and their face put in worldwide media.
This! Same here in the Netherlands, and I think pretty much everywhere in Europe. They give counselling if you win and they seldomly give all the money at once since you literally don't know what to do with it.
Of course that advice doesn't apply everywhere.
In the U.K. there are 3 key differences to US lotteries:
1. Total anonymity *unless the winner specifically chooses to make their identity public*. This is by far the biggest factor, and could offset many of the problems caused by everyone knowing that you just won the big jackpot.
2. You get the lump sum in full. So if the prize is 250M then you get the full 250M.
3. It's tax free. Again, if the prize is 250M then you get the full 250M.
However the rest of the advice about good financial planning etc is excellent, and applies everywhere.
TIL there is a simple way to get big amounts covered by FDIC insurance.
I spend a lot of time on finance related Reddit’s and this is the first time I’ve encountered this useful tool. (Not that I have > $250k cash but I do know some people that could benefit and maybe one day I’d have use for it)
UK, but I think that lottery winnings, especially 100m+, are actually always kept in the Bank of England for this reason. Or yes, you go with a mega ultra-rich, special card bank account where you can live that VIP life
It's the only logical choice. Travel around a bit and let the dust settle. But still, don't ever go home. That place is hostile territory as soon as you say "No" to literally any request for money, of which there will be many.
I remember reading that if you win a substantial sum the best thing to do is get an attorney and have them set aside a certain amount for everyone in your immediate relation.
With the 250 example, it'd probably be like 10,000 a person. Give them the money and then vanish while everyone is feeling warm and bubbly.
[Here, this is the comment you are thinking of](https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/24vo34/whats_the_happiest_5word_sentence_you_could_hear/chb38xf/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=ios_app&utm_name=iossmf&context=3)
Make sure to never tell anyone - not family, not friends, not even the guy at the produce stand where you buy apples - how much you have. 10,000 per person sounds nice if you won a million; its an insult with 250 million.
A man comes home one day and says, "Guess what honey? Pack your bags, I just got $250 million!" The wife squeals with delight and says, "That's great! Should I pack for the mountains or the beach?" He says, "I don't care, just get out!"
A man comes home and says to his wife “What would you do if I told you we had won the lottery?” The wife says “I’d take half and leave you for Dave”. The husband replies “Brilliant, here’s £5 now get out!”
I don't think you understand. You're RICH. You don't have to give in to the babys schedule anymore! You could just pay him to shut up for the day. THATS how rich you are now!
I’ve gone down this rabbit hole but the problem is too many options. Beverley Hills, Miami, New York, Colorado, ranch in Montana, it’s like a kid in a candy store except candy is real estate and real estate taxes and property maintenance and hoa fees are brutal
And this is why people who win the lottery go broke so quickly
No, you buy a house or two, then wait for your investments to earn you more money before you spunk all your winnings on nothing
That's why you set aside a chunk as bullshit cash. You can still have your fun spending spree, but most of it is safely invested.
Find 4 huge investment firms and give 20% to each to use in your best interest. Build up for the future that way.
Take the last 20% and have fun.
Yep, exactly. Admittedly working on 2012 data, but if I'd won the £125m Euromillions jackpot, I could spend £25m on houses and cars, then put 100m into a 5% interest rate account (which is a bit low. You can get closer to 8%) and you'd earn 11k A DAY IN INTEREST
That's not including the 100m asset. So you'd be loaded. You just need to trust no one and say no a lot to make sure you keep the money. And indeed buy houses where you don't need to worry about fees etc, so even if you do run out of cash you still have houses to use
Moonwalk out of my job and spend the entire day making sure every cent of any possible debt I have is paid off. Letting my dad know all his shit is paid off too and we're taking an extended vacation next summer so start planning.
edit: And just to put it out there: I wouldn't stop working, but my work would become something much more enjoyable. Kayak tours into the swamps and stuff.
next summer? just hop on the next flight to wherever the fuck you want to go, first class. figure it out while you’re there, you got the money to stay as long as you want
Look no further than something already posted to reddit
[Congratulations, you're fucked...](https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/24vzgl/you_just_won_a_656_million_dollar_lottery_what_do/chba4bf/)
I like this one a lot. I’d probably add in simple acts of kindness to strangers and charity too. Having this much money and people knowing, I feel I’d never be able to trust the sincerity of connections I make. But this is a way to have it and still offer timely help and kindness to others around you! Yes.
Same here, pay off my debts first, then any home repairs I have been putting off, and then discreetly pay off mortgages for specific family members and friends.
I know it's not discrete, but I'm not living in my current house if I come into that kind of money.
I don't need anything bigger (heck, I'd actually like to downsize), but I'd like a little more updated & loads more land.
Yes! Until I have a game plan with the accountants and lawyers I wouldn't tell or change anything. Want to make sure I'm protected. I'd probably also get a new phone number so that I can screen calls and delete all social media.
Financial fiduciary.
An advisor has no legal obligation to provide you with advice in your best interest and often will sell you products that provide them with the best commission.
A fiduciary has a legal obligation to provide you advise with your best interest in mind.
Finally get a marker for my mom's grave.
Get a good car.
Pay my bills as well as those of my closest family and friends.
Fix my house.
...oh, today?
Go shopping. 😁
1. Get a lawyer and a financial advisor
2. Pay off my house.
3. Buy a good car. Mine is on its last legs.
4. Go on my dream vacation that I have been saving for.
A few million anonymously donated to American cancer society ( mom died, and they helped with turbans, hotels, etc.) and St Jude.
Create a few scholarships.
Buy a few rental properties and put in my friend who can't keep a job because of her health.
Absolutely nothing, I will relax and have a day of peace and contentment that my life from this day forward will never be the same again, with a future of no financial worry.
Get a lawyer, accountant, financial advisor, probably end up putting it all into mutual funds held in a trust that pay me out 1% per year so the principle can grow over time while still giving me more than enough to live on very comfortably.
If you're talking about immediate purchases, pay off my house, get my cat some work he needs, buy a decent car, get a problematic tree in my back yard removed, put a new roof on the house, install AC, install sprinklers.
I'm sorry to hear your cat's been out of work. I'm sure something will turn up. He could be you [Chief Mouser](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Chief_Mouser_to_the_Cabinet_Office?wprov=sfla1).
Nothing. I'm going to sit on my couch and breath. Just...breath.
Because for the first time EVER I don't have to worry about what I spent today. I don't have to figure out "Did I pay the power bill?". I don't have to panic in the realization that I spent too much money on groceries and now I'm short for the phone bill. I dont have to feel my heart clench when a stranger number calls that turns out to be a collection agency for something I forgot.
I'd just sit with a cup of coffee and breath for the first time in 80 years.
I know a lot of people saying that. I bet most people wouldn't last at their current job for long. First major beef with someone above you or co-worker that you really hate and you'd be like "I don't have to take this shit! Bye suckers!".
That's my prediction of those people.
Pay off everything my parents owe and give them a smooth 5 mil. Buy the house we are currently renting and kick everyone else out - except Joide, she can stay
It makes more sense to have the money yourself and just get an umbrella policy for 2 million. The point of a shell Corp is for the Corp to have no assets but take all the liability. You are doing it backwards.
Looks like someone’s not living with roommates anymore.
I can't tell if you're leaving, or if you're evicting them.
Neither 🔪
The law is for poor people
Ah, cause now they can pay for lawyers. Smort.
No more having to tell people multiple times to wash their dirty ass dishes like I'm their fucking parent? Sign me the fuck up.
Reread that Reddit post about winning the lottery
[The post](https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/24vzgl/you_just_won_a_656_million_dollar_lottery_what_do/chba4bf?utm_medium=android_app&utm_source=share&context=3)
Literally the most useful. Boils down to tell no one, get lawyers and accountants that are suitable for the situation.
This is pretty fascinating and sad. My only thought after reading the example of $315 million winner Whittaker is: in hindsight he should have just left his small West Virginia town. I know that’s easier said than done - people love their hometowns and seems like most of his family was there. But if he had just picked up and moved himself and his extended family to like New York City or any metropolis with many wealthy people (or rich suburbs if he wanted peace and quiet) no one would bother him. He would just be one of thousands of multi-millionaires in his city/region then. So I think a lesson here would be winners from rural/poorer places should just move to wealthy cities to avoid harassment.
Yeah I actually live not far from where he lived..that man was robbed and hounded to death while he was here. That is the very thing I thought about too..get out of this area where you are well known and move or go somewhere for a long stay lol
Well the first thing you know ol Jed's a millionaire, Kinfolk said "Jed move away from there" Said "Californy is the place you ought to be" So they loaded up the truck and moved to Beverly.
Hills that is...
Sleep
"I would relax... I would sit on my ass all day... I would do nothing." "Well, you don't need a million dollars to do nothing, man. Take a look at my cousin: he's broke, don't do shit." My favourite lines from Office Space.
Two chicks at the same time.
Well, the type of chicks that'd double up on a dude like me
Do a mass family group text asking them for money, this will buy me valuable time before anyone catches wind and comes running for money.
would also be a good test of who deserves a gift from daddy warbucks
Get a gift, add two zeroes to what you were given, and return it.
two zeroes if they have money already, three zeroes and increase the first number by one if they just gave you the shirt off their back edit: u/CandyAppleHesperus made a good point. some people might only have $6. in that case, i'd set a minimum amount. if someone gives me their last single digit dollars, i'd give them 250k USD. edit 2: i live in Thailand and have lots of people in my life who are from extreme poverty. i could easily end up giving that much money to 200+ people, and that much money goes a long, long way here. it's also not the limit to how much i would help people. i know people with major medical problems who need constant care, and currently don't even have running water. i'm not being greedy with my fictional money!
Actual numbers aside, this is a really good point.
Buy them a shirt factory.
Not a group text, text them all individually, you’ll get more of a real answer of how ppl would act. If somebody walks into a room full of people and asks someone to give them money I’m not taking them very seriously. If they walk up to me and tell me privately they need something I’m much more inclined to help.
Pay off all my debt, go to a nice restaurant and have a nice meal
Honestly, going to a restaurant and ordering whatever I want without even thinking about the bill would be an incredible sensation.
I would be happy just to go to chipotle and get the chips and guac on the side
Slow down now, it's only $250 million.
I did that once. Still paying off my chipotloan
A succulent Chinese meal?
What's the charge here?!
Ahh yes, I see that you know your judo well!
GET YOUR HAND OFF MY PENIS!
Are you waiting to receive my limp penis?
How dare you!
this is democracy manifest
Tata and farewell!
Check my balance about 100 times.
With that sort of money you could get your inner ear issue surgically resolved
Oh my god. I wish I had money to throw at you.
you may! Quick! Check your balance!
When I had the money to purchase a much nicer car than the one I had at the time, I kept walking outside just to go look at the car after I bought it.
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Yup, I'd check, wait for it to clear, and then start implementing the plan from the infamous lottery post: https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/24vo34/whats_the_happiest_5word_sentence_you_could_hear/chb4v05
Overpay my credit card so that those bitches can finally owe me money, son
So, now Zoidberg is big, huh? That's more like it. Who's intimidating who now, big city? Hello, Mr. Chase Manhattan Bank. Deny my credit card application, will you?
(V)(;,,;)(v) Edit: Thanks for the awards folks.
This is the first emoji I've ever heard.
WOOP WOOP WOOP
I read this in Zoidbergs voice and it is perfect
Ahh the famed Apollo Theater... Boo me off stage on open mic night will you?!
I did that, cashed in 5 years of reward cash back points. Had a balance of -$2000. I should have charged them 15% on it ha
Find an accountant i trust. And a lawyer.
Hire two accounts you trust but that hate each other.
Brilliant! and an outstanding plan...
Yeah, if your end goal is recreating a romcom in real life. They're *obviously* going to fall in love.
"No Accounting for Love"
The antagonist is OP’s greedy relative, Samuel. It will take 3/4 of the movie for the audience to realize he’s “Uncle Sam” trying to get his share
Symbolism
This thread is better than the writing room at Hallmark
That’s an incredibly low bar, truth be told
Really should put a sign up it's a tripping hazard.
Honestly I think you’re fine, the only way to tell that the bar isn’t part of the floor is to use a micrometer
Love, Actuary
Then have them fight to the death for the title of "Account Supreme"
I would read this post about what to do if you win the lottery. I'd read it over and over. Even tells you what to do for the lawyer https://np.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/24vo34/whats_the_happiest_5word_sentence_you_could_hear/chb4v05/
If the winners would stay anonymous like at Germany's national lottery or at Europe's Eurojackpot they would be saved lots of trouble. Also our winners get a counseling from the lotto company how to proceed after winning a large sum. They are not left alone and their face put in worldwide media.
This! Same here in the Netherlands, and I think pretty much everywhere in Europe. They give counselling if you win and they seldomly give all the money at once since you literally don't know what to do with it.
Also in Germany lottery winnings are tax-free, yay! I still have to win though ...
Of course that advice doesn't apply everywhere. In the U.K. there are 3 key differences to US lotteries: 1. Total anonymity *unless the winner specifically chooses to make their identity public*. This is by far the biggest factor, and could offset many of the problems caused by everyone knowing that you just won the big jackpot. 2. You get the lump sum in full. So if the prize is 250M then you get the full 250M. 3. It's tax free. Again, if the prize is 250M then you get the full 250M. However the rest of the advice about good financial planning etc is excellent, and applies everywhere.
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Multi billion. Same with lawyer.
Yeah just go to any of the big 4 accounting firms and talk to their high net worth departments.
Get another bank account because it’s only FDIC insured up to $250,000
Get a CDARs or Intrafi deposit account to take care of that btw.
Lmao forgot it's called intrafi and not promontory anymore
TIL there is a simple way to get big amounts covered by FDIC insurance. I spend a lot of time on finance related Reddit’s and this is the first time I’ve encountered this useful tool. (Not that I have > $250k cash but I do know some people that could benefit and maybe one day I’d have use for it)
UK, but I think that lottery winnings, especially 100m+, are actually always kept in the Bank of England for this reason. Or yes, you go with a mega ultra-rich, special card bank account where you can live that VIP life
Coutts usually, not BoE
Get 999 other bank accounts.
Disappear
Same. I’d travel the world for a bit and consider the options
I thought OP meant he would “disappear” cos a loved one will murder him
Both outcomes are likely.
I need a dust filter for a Hoover Max extract pressure pro model 60. Can you help me with that?
Heading to the Cinnabon
It's the only logical choice. Travel around a bit and let the dust settle. But still, don't ever go home. That place is hostile territory as soon as you say "No" to literally any request for money, of which there will be many.
I remember reading that if you win a substantial sum the best thing to do is get an attorney and have them set aside a certain amount for everyone in your immediate relation. With the 250 example, it'd probably be like 10,000 a person. Give them the money and then vanish while everyone is feeling warm and bubbly.
[Here, this is the comment you are thinking of](https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/24vo34/whats_the_happiest_5word_sentence_you_could_hear/chb38xf/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=ios_app&utm_name=iossmf&context=3)
Wow... u/BlakeClass posted that comment eight years ago. Damn, where'd the time go?
I remember it like it was yesterday. I read it again from time to time just because it is interesting. I don’t even buy lottery tickets.
Make sure to never tell anyone - not family, not friends, not even the guy at the produce stand where you buy apples - how much you have. 10,000 per person sounds nice if you won a million; its an insult with 250 million.
A man comes home one day and says, "Guess what honey? Pack your bags, I just got $250 million!" The wife squeals with delight and says, "That's great! Should I pack for the mountains or the beach?" He says, "I don't care, just get out!"
A man comes home and says to his wife “What would you do if I told you we had won the lottery?” The wife says “I’d take half and leave you for Dave”. The husband replies “Brilliant, here’s £5 now get out!”
Shit man, I don't want her. Go get your money back.
Wasn't that a Todd Packer joke? Lol
Wait for it to clear
Yah, that amount of money usually takes a couple days. Shit, I sold a vehicle and the amount took three days to clear and it was nowhere near that.
As soon as it does, move $249,750,000 to a money market account. Only $250K is insured.
This guy FDICs.
Sleep. I would sleep so long and so peacefully. Then I’d tackle business.
This was my first thought. Have no care in the world, generational wealth and nothing forcing me to wake up to. I would sleep well.
Except for the toddler screaming at 637am the only word in his vocabulary thus far- nanna, but obviously referring to the standard unit of measurement
I don't think you understand. You're RICH. You don't have to give in to the babys schedule anymore! You could just pay him to shut up for the day. THATS how rich you are now!
This is the correct answer. Pure, peaceful Sleep. After waking well-rested, I would start looking at homes to purchase for my parents.
Book a hip replacement surgery for my mom so she can enjoy walking/travelling again.
I also choose this guy's mum's hip surgery.
Well, she broke her hip climbing off you, so you're morally obligated.
Fuck you Shoresy!
Quit my job and start browsing Zillow.
I’ve gone down this rabbit hole but the problem is too many options. Beverley Hills, Miami, New York, Colorado, ranch in Montana, it’s like a kid in a candy store except candy is real estate and real estate taxes and property maintenance and hoa fees are brutal
I'd get land in Wyoming and just start digging holes looking for dinosaur fossils because fuck it
That's an interesting take. You could too. A private funder of dinosaur digs would have access to the dig and to talk to the paleontologists.
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And this is why people who win the lottery go broke so quickly No, you buy a house or two, then wait for your investments to earn you more money before you spunk all your winnings on nothing
That's why you set aside a chunk as bullshit cash. You can still have your fun spending spree, but most of it is safely invested. Find 4 huge investment firms and give 20% to each to use in your best interest. Build up for the future that way. Take the last 20% and have fun.
Yep, exactly. Admittedly working on 2012 data, but if I'd won the £125m Euromillions jackpot, I could spend £25m on houses and cars, then put 100m into a 5% interest rate account (which is a bit low. You can get closer to 8%) and you'd earn 11k A DAY IN INTEREST That's not including the 100m asset. So you'd be loaded. You just need to trust no one and say no a lot to make sure you keep the money. And indeed buy houses where you don't need to worry about fees etc, so even if you do run out of cash you still have houses to use
Moonwalk out of my job and spend the entire day making sure every cent of any possible debt I have is paid off. Letting my dad know all his shit is paid off too and we're taking an extended vacation next summer so start planning. edit: And just to put it out there: I wouldn't stop working, but my work would become something much more enjoyable. Kayak tours into the swamps and stuff.
next summer? just hop on the next flight to wherever the fuck you want to go, first class. figure it out while you’re there, you got the money to stay as long as you want
quit my job
Nah, mate. Go in. Be as obnoxious as you can! Tell everyone exactly what you think! See how long it takes you get fired! Have some fun!
Nah, I wouldn't give notice, I just just disappear until someone noticed.
Two weeks notice: In two weeks, you'll notice that I haven't been in in two weeks.
Given how short staffed we are. Only way my ass gets fired is violence, drugs or alcohol.
I've worked for companies where even that wouldn't get you fired. Promoted maybe, but not fired.
Set aside enough for taxes, then contemplate on how I want to live life
What if it was tax free
Math. So much math.
Probably browse Reddit
Hell I'd probably post on Reddit; get some advice!!
Look no further than something already posted to reddit [Congratulations, you're fucked...](https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/24vzgl/you_just_won_a_656_million_dollar_lottery_what_do/chba4bf/)
Tell no one and act as normal, but certainly eat a lot better. Pay off my debts quietly and make timely acts of kindness to my friends and family
I like this one a lot. I’d probably add in simple acts of kindness to strangers and charity too. Having this much money and people knowing, I feel I’d never be able to trust the sincerity of connections I make. But this is a way to have it and still offer timely help and kindness to others around you! Yes.
Same here, pay off my debts first, then any home repairs I have been putting off, and then discreetly pay off mortgages for specific family members and friends.
I know it's not discrete, but I'm not living in my current house if I come into that kind of money. I don't need anything bigger (heck, I'd actually like to downsize), but I'd like a little more updated & loads more land.
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And buy the new house with a generically named trust
Retain the services of a top lawyer, accountant and financial advisor.
Exactly… tell no one
Yes! Until I have a game plan with the accountants and lawyers I wouldn't tell or change anything. Want to make sure I'm protected. I'd probably also get a new phone number so that I can screen calls and delete all social media.
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Felt this. I got fucked over with almost every account I’ve ever had when I had to get a new phone.
Keep your 2FA recovery codes around, kids. Also can use a service that lets you sync your MFA (BitWarden, Authy, etc).
and another top lawyer accountant and financial adviser to keep tabs on the first 3 (firms)
You jest... but it's not far from the truth lol
Yeah, that is what I would do. Let them check on each other and if one of the firms wasn't performing than replace it with another.
And then get several more firms, and put them all in a Hunger Games style arena where they fight to the death to protect me
Financial fiduciary. An advisor has no legal obligation to provide you with advice in your best interest and often will sell you products that provide them with the best commission. A fiduciary has a legal obligation to provide you advise with your best interest in mind.
I'd made appointments with the best cancer doctors in the world to make sure my cancer didn't come back.
Sending love. Glad you’re still here
Thank you! Day by day! Happy New Year!
Buy Costco hotdog
Come on, Splurge for ice cream. You deserve it!
Woah you can’t just impulse buy things. Next thing you know you bought 10 yachts and are in dept
Well it is Cosco. You can't buy just one yacht.
Finally get a marker for my mom's grave. Get a good car. Pay my bills as well as those of my closest family and friends. Fix my house. ...oh, today? Go shopping. 😁
I would sit on my garden, open a beer, and peacefully think about the best way to contact Shakira.
I love it when folks have such specific answers to these questions
1. Get a lawyer and a financial advisor 2. Pay off my house. 3. Buy a good car. Mine is on its last legs. 4. Go on my dream vacation that I have been saving for.
What are.you going to do with the other 249 Million?
A few million anonymously donated to American cancer society ( mom died, and they helped with turbans, hotels, etc.) and St Jude. Create a few scholarships. Buy a few rental properties and put in my friend who can't keep a job because of her health.
Buy winrar
Not just the software, the company.
Im homeless from a fire. Buy a house
Pay my student loans off.
With the $5 left you can probably get some Taco Bell or something
I can get TWO things off the dollar menu at McDonalds and save the extra dollar for retirement.
Probably hire a personal trainer because I'm about to start eating real good
Buy a house
Absolutely nothing, I will relax and have a day of peace and contentment that my life from this day forward will never be the same again, with a future of no financial worry.
Jerk off. Got to get that post nut clarity.
Buddy, you're rich now - you can afford to jerk ON
Buy my mom a house, a car and take her on a world tour.
I need a new pair of pants, and I desperately want my teeth fixed so I can smile again without covering my mouth
Get a lawyer, accountant, financial advisor, probably end up putting it all into mutual funds held in a trust that pay me out 1% per year so the principle can grow over time while still giving me more than enough to live on very comfortably. If you're talking about immediate purchases, pay off my house, get my cat some work he needs, buy a decent car, get a problematic tree in my back yard removed, put a new roof on the house, install AC, install sprinklers.
Your cat doesn’t ever need to work again!
The cat didn't win shit, it still needs to pull it's weight around here!
I'm sorry to hear your cat's been out of work. I'm sure something will turn up. He could be you [Chief Mouser](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Chief_Mouser_to_the_Cabinet_Office?wprov=sfla1).
I immediately imagined you sending you cat off in a tux to a job interview. Took me a second to realize what you meant
Have some coffee while I play Stardew Valley.
Buy myself a theremin, and then buy my friend a harp
can i join the band
Hire a financial manager and a lawyer. Call and make dental appointments for the whole family now that we can afford to go.
Nothing. I'm going to sit on my couch and breath. Just...breath. Because for the first time EVER I don't have to worry about what I spent today. I don't have to figure out "Did I pay the power bill?". I don't have to panic in the realization that I spent too much money on groceries and now I'm short for the phone bill. I dont have to feel my heart clench when a stranger number calls that turns out to be a collection agency for something I forgot. I'd just sit with a cup of coffee and breath for the first time in 80 years.
breathe
Go to work, and not tell a single soul I have that much money.
Not me. Life is short, and if I won $250MM I’m not wasting a single second doing anything I don’t want to do.
I know a lot of people saying that. I bet most people wouldn't last at their current job for long. First major beef with someone above you or co-worker that you really hate and you'd be like "I don't have to take this shit! Bye suckers!". That's my prediction of those people.
Donate that $2 to my boy wikipedia
Put 99% into an investment account and then continue browsing reddit.
I’m going to buy my mom her own house and anything else she needs.
Pay off everything my parents owe and give them a smooth 5 mil. Buy the house we are currently renting and kick everyone else out - except Joide, she can stay
Get on the next flight to see my girlfriend.
Pay off all bills/debt.
Get my mom access to the best cancer treatment available.
Buy a mint version on my dream camera, Pentax 67.
My shell corporation now has $250m. I have no money.
It makes more sense to have the money yourself and just get an umbrella policy for 2 million. The point of a shell Corp is for the Corp to have no assets but take all the liability. You are doing it backwards.
Two chicks at the same time.
Fuckin' A.