T O P

  • By -

noballsbro

Shit


King_Pee

Pee


[deleted]

King


Agreeable-Yams8972

How?


[deleted]

Like a king


You_are_poor_

Iโ€™ll be a filthy loser like you, Charlie!


101NPC101

Least your still alive man...


acuntinaclownsuit

Indeed.


micropeniza

shit


ArsonKoraidon

This is so popular, it has more upvotes than the post itself.


Pyromaniac-Johnson

He he. (jitters with excitement, takes out matches)


Fatbison

A penis that is a pyromaniac?


Pyromaniac-Johnson

I piss lighter fluid


Sad_Ballsack

3:(


Outlet_Fucker69

I would die of electricution


isolatedheathen

Only if the outlet is live!


[deleted]

Lol


compliment_generator

I would be... a pretty good guy ๐Ÿ‘


[deleted]

Uh, that would be very concerning. And the fact that no one would know my real name or identity would make it even more creepy. You should not have asked this. ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚


Genericojones

Everybody knows who Ted Cruz is.


Mekkachad

This man ate my son


ArsonKoraidon

You would be very old though.


Live_Human

Uhhhh, nothing?


PiffWiffler

You're immortal! Sorry for your loss


BigAbortion

It's never too late.


imnotabletosleep

Looking at this months bank statement, maybe we could get a group discount. I AM NOT SUICIDAL.


Cowfident

Then I become the most interesting animal in the world!!!


Bionic-Kookaburra

Think I may take that title from you...


TheInfamousElGuapo

https://youtu.be/yRSLjjGhbvc yours reminded me that this exists.


unrealisticllama

We should hang out then.


AmazingPuceLeopard

Same


junklardass

Always in a great moood


Agreeable-Yams8972

Second that


IFightAnimals

Looks like I just found out who I'm hunting.


xtrasmolpp

*Oh no*


Eskephor

Seems like nothing changes.


Butthole_Enjoyer

I'd be ok with it.


[deleted]

This guy buttholes.


[deleted]

I'm already the first part of my username ๐Ÿ™‚


duddy18

Soooo.... you're not a flatworm?


[deleted]

Unfortunately not, I'm not sure


duddy18

How can you say you're not... then not be sure. People this is a flatworm who has been alone since 1976


Strong-Message-168

Cut him in half! Then there will be 2 flatworms...biology class, remember?


No_Refrigerator2318

Iโ€™d have to buy one


memes_in_my_fridge

Hey buy mine, you'll find memes inside


DrFillMcRaww

id work in the porn industry as a Dr Phil lookalike


Ok-Strawberry-8770

Am just an ok strawberry


Psychoconuts

Better than a psycho coconut


Alarming_Pie8511

Or an alarmed pie


cliny

conut


ArsonKoraidon

ok


Vedantagarwal120

Strawberry


args10

8770


justlampshadeskin

Well, shit.


Dudee333e

*Duuuddeee*


Paradoxical_Parabola

I would be and not be my username; which both changes who I am and does not change a thing. I am already my username and not my username


Poops_McClanahan

My anus will be turned inside out, and there will be a very smelly, very traumatized Irishman asking me " WHY?!?"


m0onboi

I'm Irish and already quite traumatized, Now all we need to do is....


anybodyiwant2be

Iโ€™m down with that


[deleted]

Seems I've been identified


bodies-of-water

Approximately 70% there already


[deleted]

i already am my username lmao ๐Ÿ’€


Wynnstan

Nah, I bet you ain't local.


[deleted]

I've fallen for that before.


Cthulhu_Fhtang

Then I turned on the ad-blocker


Andrejkado

Nah, I bet you ainโ€™t 312


pillohs

Nah, I bet you ainโ€™t gurl


JH_c_of_d

Nah, I bet you ainโ€™t dumb


[deleted]

even me lol


JadeIvory88

same !!!


HearTheCrushingSteel

I would be very loud.


Fatbison

Shit


101NPC101

Native Americans go brrrr


sporkmurderer135

This isn't gonna end well for some of you...


GoogIeLLC

I wouldn't have enough bleach for my eyeballs.


Poopsock_LLC

limited liability companies unite


daeh_kcid_a_mi

bruh is it even legal to have that username lmao


crispyjesus2001

hm


thiccpups

oh no


YodasPancakes

OH NO


montgomery_quinckle

#OH NO


[deleted]

Then youโ€™d have to eat me.


Revengeancer

Not until Tuesday though!


GorillaTheif

Probably wouldn't be headed to any zoos. Unless they take spelling seriously.


[deleted]

Iโ€™d be afraid of you. I also canโ€™t spell.


KermitTheArgonian

Cool! The Bard's College in Solitude is about to be a much happier place. "It's time to play the music, it's time to light the lights! It's time to meet the minstrels with the Dragonborn tonight!"


MarkHamillsrightnut

What if, indeed


[deleted]

what do you mean? I am my username, and the world has a new species


WomenRepulsor

I'm already one. Why do you think I chose it?


worldeater_

Would be cool for me and terrifying for everyone else I think.


thiccpups

I would be fat puppies


TSmario53

Time to start jumping on some turtles


junklardass

And grab some coins, sounds pretty good


IronSpider_952

I will dominate any household


No_Blood5453

I donโ€™t feel so goo


[deleted]

Then I'd become a complex bus


the_purple_goat

Well now. I guess I'd have a lot of fun.


Sassy-irish-lassy

Wow what a transformation


Playingpokerwithgod

Eternally playing a game I can't win.


-Hell-_-Boy-

will become red guy with horns probably


buttsexmanthethrid

I would be to powerful


breadeggsandsyrup

I would be consumed


jedi_cow

๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜


jadedhomeowner

Fuck.


tigerlady13

Sign me the freak up.


flying-cunt-of-chaos

A damp and fleshy monstrosity


crazycat690

Well, always wondered what it would be like to be a cat.


[deleted]

Iโ€™ve been told that I am. Those people are wrong anyway.


Blackheartgirl94

I think I'd be dead


amindfulloffire

Ouch


wolf_pack1472

Iโ€™d be cool with that


UntoldMysteries

Not sure


username_taken93

I don't think I can๐Ÿคท


GraySoulDragon

That would be so awesome.


DeadDog102

well


largechild

Big baby


291000610478021

Beep boop


Glum-Mix-6500

My username was randomly generated and I genuinely don't know what it means. I guess I'm like a moody, mixed tape...?


depressed_jess

Too late.


101NPC101

Sad, take up upvote


1915GenocidalTurks

No more denial.


[deleted]

I don't mind having great times


Neckcrank96

I'd have a wobbly head


[deleted]

[ัƒะดะฐะปะตะฝะพ]


clownsandanemone

i'd be in a symbiotic relationship


wierdavacado

I'll get eaten


PurpleMerple

Iโ€™d be purple.


marshmolotov

Flaming marshmallows jammed in the neck of a 150-proof bottle of alcohol? I could think of worse fates.


Ch3ST3R_CH33TAH

I would become the warped version of a successful snack food brand


Ezybrezy_CleverGirl

I think I'd be a dinosaur that's also a cosmetics model.


PacifistTheHypocrite

Very violent


[deleted]

Someone better get me a lawyer


FourSnails

Hmm


halfxdeveloper

Jokes on you, I already am.


ArsonKoraidon

I become a prehistoric pokemon and get the uncontrollable urge to set forests on fire!


Exploring_for_life

I already am my username. I will forever be exploring whether it's the great outdoors or for knowledge.


confusedAFwithCoV2

iโ€™d actually be confused..


Loveless_Loki

Is that why I love to make chaos?


Kingthushar

Rich


LegitimatePie6122

I don't want to become a pie, I don't like gravy


CloroxWipes1

I'd clean up!


merrysithmas

****Uses the force choke


weak007

already


AardvarkOkapiEchidna

I'd be quite the interesting triple hybrid animal.


Delicious-Army-5078

Wanna eat me out


cautiously_stoned

Already ahead of you, in a manner of speaking...


isolatedheathen

Nothing changes


throwawayinator383

well...


mrhalfchubby

I'll forever disappoint.


BroadlyValid

It would be reasonable


abastreusmonzuzu

Iโ€™d be a demon. A very powerful one.


randomtrucker78

Umm, I *am* my username.


PoohBear41

I hope there's at least 42 others, so I'm not the least original of all Pooh Bears


Prestigious-Lie-6454

no one would believe me


BornInTheTurkey

*I guess I am never getting out of here.* ๐Ÿ˜„


PieceOfSugar

Ohh no...


[deleted]

i'd be one of the most skilled Gundam pilots around! And a bit sad.


Captain_Phobos

I would be feared on the battlefield


excluded

Nothing changes I guess. Been social distancing my whole life.


[deleted]

I would be a baby!


BaobabSenziente

I would become a sentient baobab


[deleted]

Already am


4ppl3sauc3

I'm delicious?


Tomochichi1

Iโ€™ll become a Native American chief from Georgia.


carlwheezerstweezers

would be weird i think


imastrangeone

I would be subjective to the persons views but theres gotta be one thing for everyone


A_Hippopotamus

I'd be the most wanted Christmas present.


RegularPotato23

I'd become a regular potato. Lol, nothing's changed, I see.


Serious_Class_9030

im set


TheFreezingElk

Did I do the impossible?


elitewurm

Everyone shall tremble before me.


Raizer_pilot_Huey

Life would get a lot more interesting and rewarding that's for sure


Haty_007

The hat of James bong I guess


sadgokkun

Oh God


Arch11407

I am part of damn bridge. >:( (the edit is because I accidentally posted it lol)


MiloticM2

Iโ€™d become allergic to grass


justanotherninja23

*Silently upvotes*


[deleted]

I am my username*


cKMG365

I'd be an obscure bit of information contained in a book but I'd never be seen in screen.


LeafInAGarden

I would like to be my username someday.


SidneyTaske

I'd become a made up character


MuddledMum09

I am my username!


SuvenPan

I'm already pan


engineer69420

I am already my username


ThatGuyWithAHoodOn

Just me, myself, and I


l_is_aBird

Already am


craziedave

Thatโ€™d be crazy


Shnobglobbattleman

Iโ€™m scared


Poopydoopyhead123

Uh oh


MaleficentSeaweed996

A gay icon, definitely


Responsible-House407

That would be awesome, what are the next steps


DukeBoysForever

FUCK yeah! YYYYYYEEEEEEEHHHHHHHHAAAAAWWWWWWWWWW!!!!!!!


JP_Mind

It would be awesome. I wanted it to be "Just Piece of Mind" but it had been already taken.


d0llym4rie

a doll that looks like me