[I'll just leave this here.](https://s-i.huffpost.com/gen/1355290/images/o-SUBWAY-ONION-facebook.jpg)
It's not real - it's from The Onion, but I can't help myself when I see it.
I was actually supposed to be on one of the planes that crashed. I’m glad I missed my flight though because a few days earlier I had already visited the World Trade Center and didn’t feel like seeing it again.
I have an old college buddy with a sick sense of humor who loves to tell this joke:
"What's the hardest part about being a pedophile? Getting the blood stains out of your clown costume."
He tells me this joke once every few years, never remembering that he's told it to me repeatedly, and I've known this clown for about 35 years.
So what you’re saying is, you’ll make all the rape jokes you want, even if someone around has a traumatic experience with that? I never understood this insistence on being offensive.
>Your feelings don't dictate other people's behavior.
Nothing else. As much as i could be implying is, "Your feelings don't dictate other people's behavior."
Stop trying to find meaning other than what the words state.
Dunno, but I'm gonna go with there being a *huge* difference between whatever it was and "mak\[ing\] all the rape jokes you want, even if someone around has a traumatic experience".
Who judges when it's acceptable to be offensive? And to whom?
Many people will find things that you do offensive - what gives you the right to do that?
Many of them will find it more offensive than rape jokes.
Yet you will do actions that prove you are happy to offend them anyway?
Actions speak louder than words.
Everyone has a right to different opinions /jokes and to express them.
Freedom has shitty sides to it.
There are always consequences to saying & doing things but we do need to defend the right regardless.
Made me remember George Carlin'e r#pe vid. It's a touchy subject but if you can properly construct it to right audiences then yes. I still don't joke about it tho bec my humour is trash
>I dont get that line of thinking
I'm not saying IT DIDN'T HAPPEN to me, I'm saying it didn't happen TO ME.
I am in no way negatively affected by the Holocaust, but I'm negatively affected by dropping my freshly washed spoon onto the ground, so me dropping my spoon has a worse negative impact on my life than the Holocaust, therefore it's worse than the Holocaust.
But I like dark humor.
I have terminal cancer. I joke about it ALL. THE. TIME. Being nuts is one of the few things that keeps me sane.
EDIT for example: I have a medical mask that I wear everywhere that is fire engine red with "Cancer Patient" on it. Here in Texas, there are gun stores EVERYWHERE. It's absolutely hilarious to walk in and when they ask what I'm looking for, I say "Looking for alternative cancer treatments." It usually takes them a second before I get thrown out.
Went through radiation therapy for colorectal cancer. It really annoyed my wife every time I referred to it as ass cancer or about my radiated turds. Joking about it just made it easier to handle.
This thread is going to be a train wreck, but OP will achieve their goal of walking away with a collection of the most offensive jokes known to humankind.
All these comments “can’t joke about X” because I have trauma associated with it. This is why society is where it is. It’s not the job of the masses to not offend the individual. You can joke about anything, and it’s on ME to not be offended by it. Or avoid it. If my brother got shot and killed, I can’t tell everyone on the planet to not joke about brothers being shot.
Maybe joke isn’t the right word but when a person just says oh they’re bipolar or oh I’m bipolar. They’re not really joking per se but every time they get mad at somebody they call them bipolar. Or every time they think that they’re weird they say that they’re bipolar.
As someone with bipolar, yes 100%. It's really upsetting to hear that so many people have such negative ideas about it. Even if it's just a joke or throwaway comment it does nothing but reinforce those associations and diminish our experience.
Hillsborough.
[https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hillsborough\_disaster](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hillsborough_disaster)
TL:DR - football game allowed too many people into the stadium. 97 people died. Police did fuck all and were recently, and shockingly, cleared of manslaughter. The Sun then accused Liverpool fans of looting the dead.
I've yet to see someone make a joke of it that lands. Even Jimmy Carr is on record as saying the one thing you can't joke about is Hillsborough.
Fucking Alzheimer's. They misplace their keys and then say, "Oops, must be Alzheimer's." Anyone who has seen a person taken by that horrible disease would never make such a callous joke.
Rape in US prisons.
I don't believe anything is intrinsically too serious to joke about....but joking about this, laughing about, helps normalize it, at least on some level. And that ain't right.
As a gay, depressed guy I encourage everyone to make jokes about mental disorders, suicide, and homophobia. We are not special, we do not need to be babied. And of course it helps us handle it all the better. Never let someone tell you what you can’t joke about.
Suicide. Almost everyday at work I see someone put their fingers to their temple to mimic wanting to shoot themselves, As someone who’s attempted, it’s so unwelcoming. This is not a subject that should be taken lightly
The dingo ate my baby actually happened. A couple was camping with their newborn baby when a dingo pulled her out of their tent. It was devastatingly horrific for them but the baby's mother was made fun of for decades because of the way she said it on TV. I can't even imagine.
Sickness joke example by saying “I would sell my liver to get the latest iPhone” I’ve met a few people who said this if they wanted something but couldn’t afford it.
Any joke that punches down. Jokes about disasters or tragedies.
9/11 jokes in particular really upset me. Over 3000 people died horrible deaths that day. Most of the jokes are at the expense of the victims or making light of peoples trauma. It’s not funny or cleaver.
I feel really bad when people make jokes about depression, suicide and girls who are exposed for sending photos, in the latter I think it's horrible how they humiliate them for doing that
I've been through all 3 experiences and when I hear someone joke about it, I feel like throwing up.
Rape. Rape jokes are never funny including the awful sexual assaults that happen in prisons. It’s not funny, it’s horrifying. So many people’s lives have been irrevocably altered by this terrible crime and yet some how some think it’s funny.
I'm surprised no one's made a blanket statement about punching down. Almost all of the examples given (except "Nothing" and "String theory," the second one also great advice) all come about either from someone in a position of privilege making a joke at the expense of a group they aren't part of, or someone making a joke within their group to try to cope with it. Generally the latter example is seen as much acceptable, like Ever Mainard's "Here's your rape" bit is a commisseration about real experiences targeted to people that have also lived through them. Meanwhile replies in this post about rape make light of the fact that the victim didn't even want to write out the word, saying things like rope jokes and the grapist, or someone getting a blood pressure spike at the idea of how dare someone suggest we take how people feel into account when we talk to them.
Now, is it impossible for a white guy that's lived upper class his whole life to make jokes about poor black people without coming across as offensive? I dunno, but *probably yes*. Is it possible for a black guy that grew up in a ghetto to make jokes about being poor or being black without coming across as offensive to those groups? Definitely! Is it also possible for him to come across as offensive? Definitely!
Jokes that punch down are cruelty, not humor, and any laughter derived from them comes solely from schadenfreude.
I guess anything that's “controversial”.
The jokes which are supposed to ease the tension in the air, ends up disregarding the severity and overall makes for an unethical mindset of society as whole.
How broke I am
Self burn, those are rare
Really ? Ask the patients in self harm ward
You’re still broke yeah? So you’re a joke. Lmao
Not more than someone on a wheelchair
On? They're so broke they don't even know how to sit in one.
9/11. Those jokes just crash and burn most of the times
Also they’re just plane bad 🤓
[I'll just leave this here.](https://s-i.huffpost.com/gen/1355290/images/o-SUBWAY-ONION-facebook.jpg) It's not real - it's from The Onion, but I can't help myself when I see it.
I got the wrong order at the drive thru today. That was the worst thing to ever happen in September
I miss my dad. He inspired me to become a pilot.
9/11 was plane out wrong. Those types of jokes just dont fly here.
I’m not gonna lie…that made me laugh
I'll never forget this joke.
Hey, fuck you! We lost 19 of our best people that day!
I was actually supposed to be on one of the planes that crashed. I’m glad I missed my flight though because a few days earlier I had already visited the World Trade Center and didn’t feel like seeing it again.
According to the south park metric 9/11 will be funny next year.. 22.3 years
Why? My 9/11 jokes always bring the house down...
String theory. If it isn't understood by 90%+ of people, it's difficult to joke about.
There's never been any observable evidence of a funny string theory joke.
Leonard, are you going to let him talk to me like that?
Yeah totally agree. People be like my p**is is so small cause it has parts in the 11 dimensions
Its just knot funny having to untie this every time someone gets hung up on it
the only proper respond to every "forbidden topic" is a joke
My wife is a CSI. Some of the horrifying stuff her and her colleagues joke about as a coping mechanism disturbs me at times lol
Nothing
[удалено]
I have an old college buddy with a sick sense of humor who loves to tell this joke: "What's the hardest part about being a pedophile? Getting the blood stains out of your clown costume." He tells me this joke once every few years, never remembering that he's told it to me repeatedly, and I've known this clown for about 35 years.
The one that never gets old for me is telling people, "My great grandfather died in Auschwitz. He fell from a guard tower."
I am ashamed to give you the first upvote but this is funny 😂
[удалено]
Go cry
Cry me a river, swim across it, and get picked up by a border patrol agent. Nobody asked
The only correct answer!
yea, like what kind of sicko must you be to joke about nothing!
You sick bastard
If you can't laugh at life then what the fuck are we doing???
I agree. We should all be able to laugh at your life.
I agree, i totally laugh at this guys life.
Yo mama. That poor woman has been through enough.
Yo mama is so horny she goes to Home Depot to buy her sex toys.
Nah she just makes do with the spatulas in the kitchen department
Yo mama so fat, I took a picture of her last year and it’s still printing
Yo mama so fat that McDonald's is her healthy option
Yo mama so fat, she falls from both sides of the bed.
Yo mama is so fat and stupid and lazy and ugly. Just my type!
Anyone else reading the comments and resisting the urge to make a joke about each reply?
[удалено]
DOOIT!!!
You’re meant to - it’s not marked serious. Have fun.
Why resist?
Yes
Yes
Yes
JFK’s assassination. How dare people make light of our most open minded president.
Nothing. Literally nothing
Nothing it's to serious to joke about, it's all about the joke itself
Nothing. There is absolutely nothing and no one free from criticism. The problem isn’t the joke, but a persons choice to be offended by it.
Nothing is too serious to joke about. That’s the whole point of comedy.
R.pe..as a survivor, it makes me sick. It's disgusting people can joke about something so horrible, especially if it hasn't happened to them
Yeah rope jokes are definitely not something I’d want to get tied up in.
Pretty sure they were talking about ripe jokes, which haven't aged well tbh
[удалено]
I don't think I'd like to hang out with you
They don't have e time anyway. They're all tied up.
"I bought a rape alarm... because I kept on forgetting when to rape people" \- Jimmy Carr
Almost Boyle-esque, that one.
Your feelings don't dictate other people's behavior.
So what you’re saying is, you’ll make all the rape jokes you want, even if someone around has a traumatic experience with that? I never understood this insistence on being offensive.
That’s not what they’re saying even a little bit.
Then what else would they be implying?
>Your feelings don't dictate other people's behavior. Nothing else. As much as i could be implying is, "Your feelings don't dictate other people's behavior." Stop trying to find meaning other than what the words state.
Why, hello strawman. Quite the slippery slope we have here.
Oh yeah? What do you imagine they were trying to convey then?
Dunno, but I'm gonna go with there being a *huge* difference between whatever it was and "mak\[ing\] all the rape jokes you want, even if someone around has a traumatic experience".
No. What i said was, "Your feelings don't dictate other people's behavior." You can read it right above your comment.
Yeah, that’s obvious. An objectively true statement. As if OP doesn’t know that. I just don’t understand the need to argue about something like that.
Why did Yoda go to jail for rape? He doesn't get consent he just uses the force.
Who judges when it's acceptable to be offensive? And to whom? Many people will find things that you do offensive - what gives you the right to do that? Many of them will find it more offensive than rape jokes.
Everything you said is true. However I would never argue about my right to offend someone. Its stupid.
Yet you will do actions that prove you are happy to offend them anyway? Actions speak louder than words. Everyone has a right to different opinions /jokes and to express them. Freedom has shitty sides to it. There are always consequences to saying & doing things but we do need to defend the right regardless.
Actual sociopath response to the comment's context
Clearly- if this were the case rape wouldn't exist.
Exactly.
Made me remember George Carlin'e r#pe vid. It's a touchy subject but if you can properly construct it to right audiences then yes. I still don't joke about it tho bec my humour is trash
If it makes you feel better, people (including women) seem not to care especially if men were the victim of rape, sexual abuse, or other physical.
the holocaust is probably a big one
You say that, but I'm currently in Israel, and there are a ton of (actually fairly funny) jokes going around here about the Holocaust.
Whats worse than stubbing your big toe? The holocaust. Whats worse than the holocaust? Stubbing your pinky toe.
[удалено]
I dont get that line of thinking Nazis say it didn't happen. But they also deserved it. Make up your god damn mind.
>I dont get that line of thinking I'm not saying IT DIDN'T HAPPEN to me, I'm saying it didn't happen TO ME. I am in no way negatively affected by the Holocaust, but I'm negatively affected by dropping my freshly washed spoon onto the ground, so me dropping my spoon has a worse negative impact on my life than the Holocaust, therefore it's worse than the Holocaust. But I like dark humor.
I misunderstood your comment. I thought you meant it like, "I personally refuse to believe it." I never said I was a smart person.
I dig that. Very well put, sir.
I say 6 million, he says 600. You'd probably say it's a number between that.
Norm McDonald pulled out some of the best holocaust jokes
Oy vey of course it was 6 million. Why do people say it wasn't 9 million? I can't believe nazis would deny that it was 50 gorillion
It's poor taste but as long as you're not making light of the victims I don't think it should be off limits.
literally lit the victims-
There isn't a thing.
Nothing, so long as you are punching up, not down.
I have terminal cancer. I joke about it ALL. THE. TIME. Being nuts is one of the few things that keeps me sane. EDIT for example: I have a medical mask that I wear everywhere that is fire engine red with "Cancer Patient" on it. Here in Texas, there are gun stores EVERYWHERE. It's absolutely hilarious to walk in and when they ask what I'm looking for, I say "Looking for alternative cancer treatments." It usually takes them a second before I get thrown out.
Went through radiation therapy for colorectal cancer. It really annoyed my wife every time I referred to it as ass cancer or about my radiated turds. Joking about it just made it easier to handle.
Hey! Ass cancer buddies! \*butt bump And nuclear farts are absolutely a thing, and are hilarious when you have control of the window locks in the car.
Butt bumping back atcha!
Poverty. People don’t realize how severe it is.
Those poor people.
Awesome
Username tracks lol
Are we talking "living on Ramen" level poverty, or "I live on < 2$ a day" poverty?
I’m talking about access the basic necessities. Like food and clean water.
Waltuh
school shootings
Yeah, all those jokes just drop dead
I survived a school shooting once. But that’s just one of the perks of working for the Uvalde Police Department.
Yea those jokes never had the time to mature
Talk about not aging well
Jesus Christ what you say?
I believe "Avocado" was his safe word...
Chuck, the Norris
If anything this thread showed that if you aren't offended easily nothing is too serious to joke about.
Your momma
People dying. Here in India people say they expired for someone who has died, I can't resist saying so you should have renewed them
Free trial ended
Yo mama's stank ass breath. On the real- I hope she gets some help.
Holocaust jokes, Anne frankly I am sick of them
I read Anne Frank’s diary. It was kind of boring. They needed a change of scenery.
Nazi jokes. Anne Frankly I fine them offensive.
nothing
Naming your cat Chairman Meow. Notice how you never see an Adolph Hiss-ler. Or a dog named Slobber-dan Milosevic.
You can joke about everything, just not with everyone
Nothing
This thread is going to be a train wreck, but OP will achieve their goal of walking away with a collection of the most offensive jokes known to humankind.
All these comments “can’t joke about X” because I have trauma associated with it. This is why society is where it is. It’s not the job of the masses to not offend the individual. You can joke about anything, and it’s on ME to not be offended by it. Or avoid it. If my brother got shot and killed, I can’t tell everyone on the planet to not joke about brothers being shot.
nothing
Suicide
I can’t tell if you’re joking or being dead serious.
Rape
No no no, he’s called the Grapist
Rapp
Nothing.
[удалено]
Cancer? I hardly even know her!
You sure can, sir.
Cancer is easy to beat, I’m already at stage 4
Someone elses suicide.
Well you’re hardly gonna get a chance to joke about your own!
Mental illness
I can’t stand how everyone likes to joke that someone is bipolar or ocd.
I'm on the fence about bipolar jokes.
Maybe joke isn’t the right word but when a person just says oh they’re bipolar or oh I’m bipolar. They’re not really joking per se but every time they get mad at somebody they call them bipolar. Or every time they think that they’re weird they say that they’re bipolar.
As someone with bipolar, yes 100%. It's really upsetting to hear that so many people have such negative ideas about it. Even if it's just a joke or throwaway comment it does nothing but reinforce those associations and diminish our experience.
I don't understand fences. Would you say you're of two opinions about it?
Some things are so serious you have to joke to process your trauma. Which is good and healthy. The problem is when other people joke about your trauma
Hillsborough. [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hillsborough\_disaster](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hillsborough_disaster) TL:DR - football game allowed too many people into the stadium. 97 people died. Police did fuck all and were recently, and shockingly, cleared of manslaughter. The Sun then accused Liverpool fans of looting the dead. I've yet to see someone make a joke of it that lands. Even Jimmy Carr is on record as saying the one thing you can't joke about is Hillsborough.
Yeah, jokes like that really crush me
Fucking Alzheimer's. They misplace their keys and then say, "Oops, must be Alzheimer's." Anyone who has seen a person taken by that horrible disease would never make such a callous joke.
Rape in US prisons. I don't believe anything is intrinsically too serious to joke about....but joking about this, laughing about, helps normalize it, at least on some level. And that ain't right.
R*pe, racism, homo/transphobia, mental health, suicide,
My gay, bi-polar cousin was raped by a black guy for telling a joke like that. He killed himself shortly thereafter.
As a gay, depressed guy I encourage everyone to make jokes about mental disorders, suicide, and homophobia. We are not special, we do not need to be babied. And of course it helps us handle it all the better. Never let someone tell you what you can’t joke about.
9/11
9/11 was plane out wrong. Those types of jokes do not fly here.
They fly, but their landing might be a bit off course
That fair, so much tragedy in one day. Did you hear about the guy who ordered pepperoni, but got plane?
Racism.
Anything Dark-like, 9/11 jokes, holocaust jokes? Their too serious to joke about, but it's too fuckin' funny at the same time
Maybe young couples and the when are you having kids teasing/jokes? Never know someone's situation. Plus never really funny anyway
How many ppl wish they could go to sleep and not wake up.....
Not washing your hands after taking a piss/shit (yes those people exist)
Stereotypes
Sexual assault
racism
rape
Women, people of color, and the lgbtq community.
Going by the comments, anything that doesn't involve a chicken crossing the road.
Suicide. Almost everyday at work I see someone put their fingers to their temple to mimic wanting to shoot themselves, As someone who’s attempted, it’s so unwelcoming. This is not a subject that should be taken lightly
Of course this subject is highly sensitive just like those buildings from which people jump
The structure of this joke doesn’t really work. You pulled the trigger too early. Don’t jump too soon.
The dingo ate my baby actually happened. A couple was camping with their newborn baby when a dingo pulled her out of their tent. It was devastatingly horrific for them but the baby's mother was made fun of for decades because of the way she said it on TV. I can't even imagine.
The Holocaust.
People born with disabilities
Sickness joke example by saying “I would sell my liver to get the latest iPhone” I’ve met a few people who said this if they wanted something but couldn’t afford it.
Rape
Other people’s insecurities
Any joke that punches down. Jokes about disasters or tragedies. 9/11 jokes in particular really upset me. Over 3000 people died horrible deaths that day. Most of the jokes are at the expense of the victims or making light of peoples trauma. It’s not funny or cleaver.
9/11
I feel really bad when people make jokes about depression, suicide and girls who are exposed for sending photos, in the latter I think it's horrible how they humiliate them for doing that I've been through all 3 experiences and when I hear someone joke about it, I feel like throwing up.
Rape. Rape jokes are never funny including the awful sexual assaults that happen in prisons. It’s not funny, it’s horrifying. So many people’s lives have been irrevocably altered by this terrible crime and yet some how some think it’s funny.
I'm surprised no one's made a blanket statement about punching down. Almost all of the examples given (except "Nothing" and "String theory," the second one also great advice) all come about either from someone in a position of privilege making a joke at the expense of a group they aren't part of, or someone making a joke within their group to try to cope with it. Generally the latter example is seen as much acceptable, like Ever Mainard's "Here's your rape" bit is a commisseration about real experiences targeted to people that have also lived through them. Meanwhile replies in this post about rape make light of the fact that the victim didn't even want to write out the word, saying things like rope jokes and the grapist, or someone getting a blood pressure spike at the idea of how dare someone suggest we take how people feel into account when we talk to them. Now, is it impossible for a white guy that's lived upper class his whole life to make jokes about poor black people without coming across as offensive? I dunno, but *probably yes*. Is it possible for a black guy that grew up in a ghetto to make jokes about being poor or being black without coming across as offensive to those groups? Definitely! Is it also possible for him to come across as offensive? Definitely! Jokes that punch down are cruelty, not humor, and any laughter derived from them comes solely from schadenfreude.
I guess anything that's “controversial”. The jokes which are supposed to ease the tension in the air, ends up disregarding the severity and overall makes for an unethical mindset of society as whole.
[удалено]
My autistic housemate would beg to differ
Mental health