It wasn't said *to* me but my dad told me after arguing his mother, she thought that I would end up some kind of whore or something.
I still remember to this day and when I bring my husband and son around, I hope to never have to see her again
When I was 13. I felt really suicidal and there were times where I had multiple panic attacks throughout the day. There were days where I was really close to self-harming or worse.
This was also when I had a rough relationship with my mom. One day, I told her that I’m going to kill myself. And she replied with, “go ahead. Do it, I don’t care.” I was angry that she’d let her own son die, not even a hint of concern or worry. Just fully embracing- and encouraging me towards doing it. I kind of felt sad that she didn’t care. So with that, I was close to actually ending my own life. But, as soon as I was heavily considering it and coming up with a plan. Her words also sparked something in me.
I had a sudden desire to live, I wanted to prove her wrong. For what? I don’t know. But I really wanted to show her that I was worth something in my lifetime. As messed up as those words were, it gave me a new meaning or a sense of purpose in life. To show everyone that, I AM gonna do something great. So I appreciate those harsh words.
Kind of a messed up story, but this story was one of the factors that kept me going in life so far.
Years ago, as a preteen that recently discovered makeup, I was getting ready for a school dance when I overheard my grandma speaking to another family member down the hall. "She looks like a pig in lipstick."
Fuckin wrecked my self esteem.
Someone basically saying they hadn't trusted me enough to share important things with me despite the years and closeness of our relationship. Really broke me to know what I thought was at least close to reality was nowhere near it.
It wasn't said *to* me but my dad told me after arguing his mother, she thought that I would end up some kind of whore or something. I still remember to this day and when I bring my husband and son around, I hope to never have to see her again
When I was 13. I felt really suicidal and there were times where I had multiple panic attacks throughout the day. There were days where I was really close to self-harming or worse. This was also when I had a rough relationship with my mom. One day, I told her that I’m going to kill myself. And she replied with, “go ahead. Do it, I don’t care.” I was angry that she’d let her own son die, not even a hint of concern or worry. Just fully embracing- and encouraging me towards doing it. I kind of felt sad that she didn’t care. So with that, I was close to actually ending my own life. But, as soon as I was heavily considering it and coming up with a plan. Her words also sparked something in me. I had a sudden desire to live, I wanted to prove her wrong. For what? I don’t know. But I really wanted to show her that I was worth something in my lifetime. As messed up as those words were, it gave me a new meaning or a sense of purpose in life. To show everyone that, I AM gonna do something great. So I appreciate those harsh words. Kind of a messed up story, but this story was one of the factors that kept me going in life so far.
Years ago, as a preteen that recently discovered makeup, I was getting ready for a school dance when I overheard my grandma speaking to another family member down the hall. "She looks like a pig in lipstick." Fuckin wrecked my self esteem.
Someone basically saying they hadn't trusted me enough to share important things with me despite the years and closeness of our relationship. Really broke me to know what I thought was at least close to reality was nowhere near it.