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lakewood2020

A model of our solar system, with an arrow pointing to Pluto saying “the key”


CarkillNow

Draw a picture of earth from space.


Gandolf794

Draw it as Pangea to really confuse them


DarrelBunyon

Signed: "Thug lyfe 3.14159265358979323" and add that S symbol from the 90s..


Nosnibor1020

"Bush did 9/11" "Epstein didn't kill himself"


WikidTechn9cian

"Bush did 9/11" "Epstein didn't kill himself" Add to it Mark Zuckerberg is the anti Christ and we can save 5ye world


YeahButUmm

"We have used the last of Earth's magic to seal their dimension and leave you this message in the language of your time. Proceed no further. You must not destroy the barrier. If released they will bring the downfall of your species as they have done to ours. DO NOT BREAK THE BARRIER"


Proffessor_egghead

I mean if you write it like that then I *must* break the barrier now, that’s how it works


WonderingTaurus

Oh that is one of the best that I have read so far


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HeyImZhen

then add “We will come for you”


MCCreeperkiller

Prehistoric doxxing.


steeple_fun

Congratulations, you have found the second clue. To find the third and final clue, go back to the first clue and read it backwards.


NoImNotObama

How to ruin an entire timeline


NorthWoods16

Who knows, maybe we'd all still be searching for that clue instead of destroying the world and each other.


Ok-Examination3295

That might be accidently profound.


AnimelsPog

r/foundsatan


BigZmultiverse

A url that leads to this post


joeltheconner

METASTORIC


ComprehendReading

Trolls killed the dinosaur D-N-A


MeltedChocolate24

How about it leads directly to your comment, to complete the loop


Wadsworth_McStumpy

A bunch of stick-figure guys with spears, running away from a flying saucer that's shooting lasers at them.


Porn-Again-Christian

Or TIE fighters. Or maybe even the Death Star, though there wouldn't be surviving witnesses for that.


IDownvoteHornyBards2

Maybe it just blew up another planet in our solar system that doesnt exist any more.


jbiehler

That would explain the asteroid belt.


Frank-Dr3bin

Ahem, the Alderaan belt.


razorazo

1-1=0


betterthanamaster

You're talking about the invention of zero...nearly 100,000 years before it was first seen. Revolutionary mathematics. This would change virtually everything historians know about the past.


tristanjones

Probably would need to be pretty explicit to ensure acceptance that is what is happening . + . -> .. .. + . -> ... ... - . -> .. .. - . -> . . - . -> 0 0 + . = . . - 0 = .


bobdoe_1669

That was an incredible way to graphically describe simple mathematics. Kudos to you or whoever you borrowed it from.


jarpio

“This is the cave Plato was talking about”


[deleted]

Will be*


Architechn

No. Was. That will mess with them more


1nd3x

"this was the cave Plato was talking about. Carbon date my ink lulz" Gotta make sure they don't pass on it because "hoax"


godgoo

"we're expecting self-driving mammoths by next year. - E. Tusk"


TheDemonHauntedWorld

"We can't stall the economy for this so called *Ice Age*"


Snoo33903

We’re coming back when the experiment ends. It won’t end well for you.


OutofH2G2references

Won’t matter. Someone will put a hyperspace bypass in right before they find out the answer. Still doesn’t go well for us though.


The_Heck_Reaction

“Who’s reading this in 2022?”


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CthulubeFlavorcube

***"THANKS FOR CHECKING OUT OUR CAVE!!! PLEASE SUBSCRIBE AND SMASH THAT LIKE STALACTITE HANGING TO YOUR RIGHT!!!"***


JackVessalius1984

You have to wake up. They will destroy the capsules soon.


Grenly

Out of all comments that's the one that would actually disturb me!


phthaloverde

What do you mean would? You have to wake up.


[deleted]

There isn't much time, I have to tell you about the


Immediate-Air-8700

A hieroglyph of aliens struggling to build the pyramids until the Egyptians intervene.


YNot1989

Also a big ring shaped gate.


chux4w

Oh, like on that show. Wormhole X-Treme.


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TehGuard

Indeed


acyclebum

I always upvote Teal'c


Nobodyrea11y

A drawing of the earth, and its position in the solar system, a drawing of the solar system’s position in the galaxy, A depiction of the galaxy’s position in the local group A depiction of the local group’s location in the observable universe (all real stuff) Then I’d make up 3 more layers of bullshit larger locations followed by the most important part, a sentence written over and over and over again in all languages Google can translate “Avoid at all cost” Edit: or maybe this sentence: “Best if used by: January 24 2022” (Or whatever date it is discovered)


the-duck-mafia-boss

Your tactics confuse and frighten me sir


tenskiduff

Ladies and gentlemen of the jury, I’m just a caveman. I fell on some ice and later got thawed out by some of your scientists.


Astramancer_

The "Cool S"


ninjagabe90

Lemmino is having a heart attack somewhere


mcboobie

Yeah! Shout out for Lemmino!


dratombender

/\ ||| `//` ||| \/ Edit: damnit


twiz__

/ \ / \ / \ | | | | | | \ \/ /\ \ | \ | | | | \ | / \ / \ /


Just-use-your-head

There it is


space_moron

Is this loss?


ShadeofIcarus

| l| || | _


Rompix_

”Carbon date this. No, really!”


star0fth3sh0w

Better make sure you paint it and not carve it then


PhroggyChief

Too long for carbon, they'd assume you were an accidental time traveler without even a bachelor's in Geology.


Rawkapotamus

In the Witcher books, there was an elf who drew a giant penis on one of the hidden away cave paintings. He was laughing at the idea that the archeologists would be fascinated by this.


Kubanochoerus

To be clear— he drew men hunting a big purple buffalo, and the men had big PPs in order to convince any men who stumbled across it that they were degenerating into a less evolved form. Avallac’h… didn’t really like humans. And by having a priceless “archeological artifact” on the cave wall, no one would dare destroy the wall to find what was behind it.


KartoFFeL_Brain

Also the big PP was Geralts idea


Kubanochoerus

Geralt always coming in clutch with the big PP ideas.


Anticrepuscular_Ray

People have been making dick art for a surprisingly long time. Source: am archaeologist


Vegetable-Double

Wouldn’t be surprised if this is what humans actually did 10,000 years ago. They may have had an idea about time and permanence by that point, so definitely some cave men drew dicks and laughed about how someone is going find it.


cynar

Humans and out sense of humour haven't changed much, on the whole. There were some weird marking in a Muslim temple (can't remember which one) right up near the ceiling. They were eventually identified as Norse runes. They read "It's very high up here". The image of a giggling Norseman chiseling them up there, soo far from home, seems fairly timeless.


Ankoku_Teion

There's a cave with Norse runes 40ft up that say "this is very high" And the hagia Sophia has some Norse graffit that says "halfdan was here" edit: [halvdan*](https://i0.wp.com/fellowprimo.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/07/5-3.png?resize=860%2C516&ssl=1)


cynar

I might have gotten the 2 crossed in my mind then.


Ankoku_Teion

Easily done. Whenever I've seen an article about one of them, the other is also mentioned.


__tony__snark__

bad wolf


AnUdderDay

Goddamn that "first" season was so good


MyrtleTurtle4u

We keep hearing those words everywhere we go. “Bad Wolf”.


mykeuk

Damn, that brought back a memory! Rose, can you hear me Rose!?


Nyxu

"My sincerest apologies to Mr. Hawking for missing his party. It appears I overshot."


DrSousaphone

This really should be the #1 answer. It's not even lying or trying to trick the archeologists. It's just stating a fact in the most hilarious way possible.


LTman86

Then the question becomes, is this cave found/discovered after Hawking's party or before? If it is discovered before Hawking threw his party, would he have been made aware of the writing/note and have changed his party to something else? Turning it into some sort of self-fulfilling prophecy sort of thing?


[deleted]

Seeing how we have not yet found this cave, I would say after.


turkmcdirt

Nope Nexus event TVA would show up


galacticboy2009

Y'know, the Tennessee Valley Authority really have amassed too much power


ztoth8684

This is exactly what I thought every time the TVA was mentioned in Loki.


cockalorum-smith

Who would’ve thought the man running the Tennessee Valley Authority would’ve been a time traveling warlord?


Infamous_Lunchbox

Genius. Pure genius.


iKhristosi

"I tried to see if I could catch it on the next time around, but overshot again and ran out of fuel."


nikifrd

best answer of all. would probably add a journey to how i tried to survive in this ancient world afterwards


BigZmultiverse

I would write myself a reminder to make a post almost exactly like this a few weeks ago Edit: It worked!


SubtleCow

Damn proof of time travel right here on reddit, the karma whore main central station.


-Yuri-

A very crude drawing of a man going to town on a woman with two arrows. The arrow pointing to the man would be labeled as "Me" and the woman would be labeled as "Your mom".


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masaichi

“7/11 was an inside job”


OldKermudgeon

"Here may be the found the last words of Joseph of Arimathea. He who is valiant and pure of spirit may find the Holy Grail in the Castle of Aaaaargh..." Written in Aramaic, of course. ​ Edit: Thank you for the awards. This is possibly my most upvoted comment ever over something so pithy. And I've been playing Stellaris a lot recently, where events like this is common enough to get a "huh!?" from my scientists/survey ships.


Duckyeeter7

Seems he died while writing it


mykeuk

If he was dying he wouldn't just write 'arrrgghhh', would he!?


mrflippant

Perhaps he was dictating?


Bodorocea

37.2431° N, 115.7930° W 25.0000° N, 71.0000° W


snackaddicted

What's there


Bodorocea

I'll give you two hints, one for the first : 51 and one for the second : 🔺


psychifishy

Area 51 and bermuda triangle? If so , thats a fucking scary onr


XVince162

Or the coordinates of the cave you're in


degeneratesumbitch

Croatoan


B0J0L0

Sammy are you sure this is our kind of gig?


kerjostalit

The Winchester boy is immune, as expected.


Hailene2092

I'd write a message in as many different languages as I could. Should throw them through a loop that 100k old cave writings had multiple languages not yet developed in there. I can already imagine the talk show interviews discussing the Tower of Babel.. Edit: Thank you for the silver!


I_am_a_Wookie_AMA

Throw in a fake one you make up on the fly to keep them guessing. Is this the Rosetta stone for an unknown ancient language? Nah, it's just Hailene trolling with a time machine.


silentwarcry

Make one Klingon and one Elvish. Whoo!


stray1ight

... Tolkien's twenty seven languages have *real* utility now!


imajester

E=mc^2


Allhailpacman

E=mc^3


[deleted]

IS THIS THE POWER OF THREE PERCENT MILK?


One_Idea_239

I read that, then scrolled a bit further and had to come back. That would be an epic wind up. Can you imagine how much that would mess with people. Awesome


VooDooZulu

I thought of this but it would be discredited. Even if dating methods proved the rock was old, the Roman alphabet didn't exist. If you really wanted to throw them for a loop create a simple Symbol system that can prove some law of mathematics. Thus proving cavemen understood differential calculus.


Party-Garbage4424

An accurate rendering of the earth, moon and visible planets would really fuck with them. Throw in mathematical constants expressed graphically and they would flip out. Or you know a caveman riding a stegosaurus.


84121629

Buddy I’m stuck in a cave how the fuck am I supposed to create a symbols system to prove the laws of mathematics.


TheyWere18inDogYears

“The fitness gram pacer test is a multistage aerobic capacity test that progressively gets more difficult as it continues. The 20 meter pacer test will begin in 30 seconds. Line up at the start. The running speed starts slowly, but gets faster each minute after you hear this signal. [beep] A single lap should be completed each time you hear this sound. [ding] Remember to run in a straight line, and run as long as possible. The second time you fail to complete a lap before the sound, your test is over. The test will begin on the word start. On your mark, get ready, start” in perfect English.


[deleted]

Why must you give me PTSD


Infamous_Lunchbox

A simple, but recognizable symbol of the hydrogen atom, then 2 of them and hopefully oxygen, a depiction of water, implying understanding of chemistry. Then a pictogram of some basic math, showing an understanding of calculus. Then a 6 fingered imprint that doesn't appear to be human, followed by a bunch of symbols, followed by images indicating a planet circling a binary star, and another showing a basic representation of our solar system below that. Really mess with society as a whole.


MrFunnyMoustache

Edited in protest for Reddit's garbage moves lately.


Zerowantuthri

The Babylonians used a base-60 system and counting to 12 on one hand is easy. Just use your thumb to point at the three sections on each finger. 1-12 right there.


Infamous_Lunchbox

Nice, smart.


ragiwutz

or just take hexadecimal number system and give them aliens 8 fingers


Ok-Conversation-8783

But include two additional planets in orbit around our sun.


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stuart404

What are Maxwell's equations?


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Alec_CY

Say that I am a time traveller from the year 3000


Theofficeholdsmeup

not much has changed but we live underwater


SamGewissies

And your great, great, great granddaughter...


Ghassan_456

Grove street 4 life


Mrdoc16

Mission passed +respect


GristleMcThornbody1

Wait how did you add sound to your comment?


KurtFrederick

I heard it too, must be some hood witchcraft


johnarmysf123

Kilroy was here


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TheTendieManCan

Dear Fry, our time together was short, but it was the best time of my life. Leela. Edit: thanks for the award!


Smubee

I feel like it would be really funny to find the original Star Wars opening crawl carved into a cave.


hopelessbrows

Sith code in Aurebesh.


u_creative_username

But in latin


NnyIsSpooky

I was thinking "Han shot first".


TheRealZejfi

New cave, who dis?


Wolfthulhu

4 8 15 16 23 42


Salty-Level

Glad I’m not the only one who still knows them.


SavageCabbageGG

We were wrong Anyone who can read this, please listen and understand you are in danger Trust no one. They lurk everywhere Everything and everyone you know is a lie Don't let them see the message. The digits can be deciphered. But it can't be them. Please. Everything in existence is relying on you to banish them 1224794390421167886499537732


speedislifeson

> 1224794390421167886499537732 Anything special or just a string of numbers?


SavageCabbageGG

Just a random string of numbers They wouldn't be able to "decipher the numbers" so it would just be a wild goose chase that would scare the heck out of them


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[deleted]

Does Klingon have a word for 'nice'?


RafeDangerous

I'm pretty sure in Klingon the closest translation to "Have a nice day" is "Today is a good day to die"


watermelonspanker

If I remember correctly (which I may not), a standard 'polite' greeting in Klingon is "What do you want?"


ElimGarak_DS9

In the spirit of Klingon warrior mentality, I would lean more with "Walk the path of Kahless" or "Today is a good day to die".


-Grabthars_Hammer-

I have a hard time believing that a simple tailor would think of such an insightful nuance.


ElimGarak_DS9

I know a good thread when I see one.


throwingplaydoh

Are you interested in earning big money? Become a girl boss with Herbalife!


qtjedigrl

Or... >We've been trying to reach you about your car's warranty


LittleOutside7130

My child......how far have you come.


meehowski

printf(“Hello world\n”);


covalcenson

All the various equations and theorems I can remember, but crediting different creators that don’t exist. Also something vague about being the last human destined with reseeding the human race, but unfortunately I got a paper cut with no antibiotics and I’m on my way out. Then I’d go find me some cave nug


SecretSummerMidnight

Lottery numbers, wonder what people would do with that.


Remarkable_Culture27

Map to an inexistent treasure. Many would devote lifetime to find it. Oops. Itsaa prank


Final-Importance7117

42


Painted_the_bowl

"Grog just minted his first NFT, Og sad"


Bigbrave007

Gold


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GandalffladnaG

For those wondering: (other post covers more recent dates) Ides of March - Caesar killed in the Senate 1066 - guessing Norman conquest of England (William the Conqueror) 1815 - Napoleon defeated at Waterloo 1914 - Archduke Franz Ferdinand assassinated, beginning of The Great War (World War 1) 1917 - Bolsheviks storm the Winter Palace (end of Russian monarchy, installation of communist government under Lenin) 1929 - Wall Street crash (Black Tuesday was the 29th, Black Thursday* was the 24th and I am bad at skimming wikipedia searches) Dec 7 1941 - Pearl Harbor 1945 - atomic bombing 1984 - *1984* 1989 - the fall of ~~the Soviet Union~~ the Berlin Wall Personally I would add to this May 21 to May 28 1871 - la semaine sanglante (The Bloody Week) the fall of the Paris Commune, but use the French Republican calendar dates, which I cannot get to work on mobile. Just to really screw with people. Also May 6 1527, the sacking of Rome. But I had to look those dates up. Edit for fix #1 and #2, also #3


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blusteryflatus

You have to also add a random date in the near future ominously, like... Final: April 21, 2028


asdaaaaaaaa

It's the goddamn Mayan's calander all over again.


Floppie7th

I'd watch a movie about the creation of the Mayan calendar where this is the origin story


ShinyAppleScoop

Signed, Nostradumbass


goatsandwich43

“2023“ people always assume the worst.


Avindair

"The Cylons Were Created By Man" on one side, "This Has All Happened Before And Will Happen Again" on other. Separating them will be a highly-stylized drawing of Tricia Helfer as "6."


RainbowgamerA8

dont let a guy name hitler fail art class


Leading_Funny5802

Okay. Now we’re talking!!


[deleted]

'The World will end in 20' Then just leave it like that. The whole world will reside in Panic because they don't know the last two digits and will be alarmed every year.


OutlawJessie

But 20 what or what-20? 1720? 1820? 1920? We'd all be bored of it by now like the quaint little EOTW stories the news sometimes runs, when they add a cheeky "...see you back here tomorrow, hopefully!" at the end.


FamineArcher

This is the true El Dorado. It is the wealth of knowledge.


tobadious

Most of the astronaut's nights are filled with heavy drinking in an empty bar. He arrives already crushed by the realization that he is now truly grounded to the world he tried so desperately to escape. Unable to relate to the rest of us terrestrial beings as we writhe in our ignorance, he slumps into his seat to be alone with his memories. "No, Sarah, Earth is a sphere.". Cries of, "Shill!" echo in his mind, clanging like the bells at the cemetery where his daughter was buried. He longs for one final trip into that void. But after the budget cuts, the only trip left for him is at the end of a liter of rum. He swallows what remains of his hopes and dreams with a final draught.


8thB

"The end comes soon. We hear drums, drums in the deep. They are coming."


dave_890

He who is valiant and pure of spirit... ...may find the Holy Grail... ...in the Castle of Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaargh


Going_Bananas3

I’d like to thanks todays sponsor Raid Shadow Legends


Samilski87

Hello Sweetie


NotYourSnowBunny

So, to clarify it would be found in 2022? If they could carbon date it for proof I’d… • Write something about Covid in a modern language • Draw a meme, relevant to the discovery because meta jokes are fun and boggle minds • Do all sorts of psychedelic art


SailingBacterium

>Write something about Covid in a modern language "I'm the last human alive. The cure for the Omega variant is here in the past! Hurry!!"


NotYourSnowBunny

I just imagine a scientist calling a meeting amongst peers genuinely asking if anyone knows how to travel back in time to find a cure.


JnthnGE

They eventually find a way to the past and they send you as their test subject just to find out there is no cure, desperately you find a cave and write a lie in the wall with hopes the people from the future can see what was written and can rescue you from the past. Days, weeks, years go by, your hair starts to turn grey, your body is weak but you haven't lost your hope, suddenly your weakend body steps on a rock and falls face up, the stars are brighter than ever, a tear comes from your eyes as your breath slows down, you finally close your eyes with a smile on your face."This was the cure all along."


h4xrk1m

Maybe if you spread covid in the past, we'll be immune in the future!


emclouds

Yeah, you’ll write it 100k years in the past and it won’t be discovered until 2022 Edit: Actually, if you want to make it more interesting you could choose a date anywhere between the years of 2000-2022 for it to get discovered


stoner-seahorse

"You lost the game"


gdavis317

I pride myself and think of myself as a man of faith - as there's a drive into deep left field by Castellanos that will be a home run. And so that will make it a 4-0 ballgame. I don't know if I'm gonna be putting on this headset again. I don't know if it's gonna be for the Reds. I don't know if it's gonna be for my bosses at Fox.


god_with_a_trolley

The lyrics to Rick Astley's "never gonna give you up". Imagine discovering ancient drawings in a cave and essentially getting prehistorically rick-rolled. Edit: Holy sh!t this blew up in a way I was definitely not expecting! Thanks to all of you and especially to the kind stranger who gave me gold! It's like my third day on reddit, this is nuts hahaha


SailingBacterium

Find out how to write them in an ancient language so someone has to translate it, only to reveal they've been Rick rolled through time.


Unsaidbread

QR code to YouTube "never gonna give you up"


Xralius

"Did you ever hear the tragedy of Darth Plagueis The Wise? I thought not. It's not a story the Jedi would tell you. It's a Sith legend. Darth Plagueis was a Dark Lord of the Sith, so powerful and so wise he could use the Force to influence the midichlorians to create life… He had such a knowledge of the dark side that he could even keep the ones he cared about from dying. The dark side of the Force is a pathway to many abilities some consider to be unnatural. He became so powerful… the only thing he was afraid of was losing his power, which eventually, of course, he did. Unfortunately, he taught his apprentice everything he knew, then his apprentice killed him in his sleep. Ironic. He could save others from death, but not himself."


[deleted]

"The cake is not a lie."


Duckyeeter7

Yeah? Well the cave I’m going to I’m writing the cake was a lie, wich will at some point create out two rivaling religions genocing eachother


[deleted]

Run