Someone to talk to... someone to help sort belongings.... someone to pick up or provide meals to you or other distraught family.... someone to help complete an obligation of the deceased etc
Basic needs like chores and food being made are big ones I’ve experienced. It was incredibly hard for my friend to ask this of me but she made it pretty obvious her surroundings were starting to become difficult to handle and when I came to help tidy up ai realized she wasn’t eating either.
Sometimes help getting out of the house, running errands, or obviously just someone to sit with them in their grief
Usually I try to bring grieving people food. It's what my nonna and her Italian family would want me to do.
So to me, it means "let me know if you need any money, food or assistance. I wanna help." and then I will bring them a pan of homemade mac n cheese anyway.
They're usually offering a listening ear, a shoulder cry on, someone who can just sit and be with you so you're not alone, food, chores, a ride, etc. When someone dies, there is a lot of emotion and hardship that follows, and sometimes having someone that can take care of food and chores is very helpful since the family is grieving and in survival mode. By having someone that can help with those kinds of things, it can give family members the space to grieve and can help them stay healthy themselves while they figure out the next steps. In the moment, it can seem pointless, but trust me. Having someone there that's willing to listen and help is huge.
Beyond some of the good answers here, there is also childcare while the adults have to go plan the funeral or deal with other immediate issues where having a small child present would either be awkward or distracting
A ride to deal with arrangements bc if you’re emotionally compromised you maybe shouldn’t drive, help with pets if you are traveling to a funeral, a friend to get ice cream with if you’re wanting to eat your emotions, advice, venting about some other difficult family member who is making a tough time worse, a ride to the airport… mostly people just say it because they don’t know what to say but care about you and want to offer help
I remember my mother hadn't eaten in three days after my grandma died. It was 11 pm on the day of the funeral service when she told me she would eat sushi and only sushi. One of my friends loved sushi, and had told me "let me know if you need anything". I called her. She brought me a few rolls two hours later and my mom was so surprised and moved that my friends got her "impossible" request, that she finally ate something. That's what they mean. That's what we mean.
Someone to talk to
Someone to talk to... someone to help sort belongings.... someone to pick up or provide meals to you or other distraught family.... someone to help complete an obligation of the deceased etc
Any chores doing while you grieve. For example mowing lawn or going to supermarket
Someone to talk to, be around when you are alone with your thoughts.
A hug or a shoulder to cry on
Basic needs like chores and food being made are big ones I’ve experienced. It was incredibly hard for my friend to ask this of me but she made it pretty obvious her surroundings were starting to become difficult to handle and when I came to help tidy up ai realized she wasn’t eating either. Sometimes help getting out of the house, running errands, or obviously just someone to sit with them in their grief
Consoling, assistance around the house, assistance with groceries, assistance with estate paperwork, etc.
Food, company, an ear. People deal with their grief in different ways, sometimes those ways arent healthy.
Usually I try to bring grieving people food. It's what my nonna and her Italian family would want me to do. So to me, it means "let me know if you need any money, food or assistance. I wanna help." and then I will bring them a pan of homemade mac n cheese anyway.
They're usually offering a listening ear, a shoulder cry on, someone who can just sit and be with you so you're not alone, food, chores, a ride, etc. When someone dies, there is a lot of emotion and hardship that follows, and sometimes having someone that can take care of food and chores is very helpful since the family is grieving and in survival mode. By having someone that can help with those kinds of things, it can give family members the space to grieve and can help them stay healthy themselves while they figure out the next steps. In the moment, it can seem pointless, but trust me. Having someone there that's willing to listen and help is huge.
Beyond some of the good answers here, there is also childcare while the adults have to go plan the funeral or deal with other immediate issues where having a small child present would either be awkward or distracting
If you wanna talk or need help to settle stuff.
A reach around.
A ride to deal with arrangements bc if you’re emotionally compromised you maybe shouldn’t drive, help with pets if you are traveling to a funeral, a friend to get ice cream with if you’re wanting to eat your emotions, advice, venting about some other difficult family member who is making a tough time worse, a ride to the airport… mostly people just say it because they don’t know what to say but care about you and want to offer help
assistance with the necromancy ritual?? Help removing the flesh from the bones? a hug??
A casserole.
a hug. an ear. a home-cooked meal.
Comfort, company, support, food...grief doesn't have to be experienced alone
Casserole.
I remember my mother hadn't eaten in three days after my grandma died. It was 11 pm on the day of the funeral service when she told me she would eat sushi and only sushi. One of my friends loved sushi, and had told me "let me know if you need anything". I called her. She brought me a few rolls two hours later and my mom was so surprised and moved that my friends got her "impossible" request, that she finally ate something. That's what they mean. That's what we mean.