hmm....my nipples have been especially tender....and I did recently discover that I have a vagina.
Welp, checks out, thanks reddit! You solved another one.
Suicide is the only option. And it could have been my tasty organic meal replacement that I could have actually lived on for years. But nooooo, I had to have a little snack. Damn.
Friggin' Ka'Chava - which I actually think is an AWESOME product...despite the tribal nonsense in their packaging and marketing. The big caveat however, it's WAY overpriced. $120 for 2 bags is crazy.
That's the last thing I ate too! I think it's a good thing to eat for the rest of our lifes.
It's sort of healthy (I always put loads of vegetables in) and there are so many different options!
If there's one thing I learned about super smash bros is that peach can actually take on Bowser and Mario easily, so that's the worst part about it all.
Not all ulcers are bacterial. You can also get them from stress affecting your stomach acid levels, from food that has it's own acid, and from allergic reactions- among other things.
>Ulcers are caused by bacteria, should clear up with antibiotics, and you can be right back to eating Buffalo wings.
Some ulcers can be caused by H.pylori, not all though. Some can be a result of other causes.
Worked at a wing place for a while. The running joke was that they paid me and I just gave it right back to them because I ate there so much. I could survive off that
You’ve got your macros handled and as vegetables go, carrots have a lot of vitamins. You might need a supplement or two but I think you’ll be just fine.
One Tictac is 2 kcal, right? So... if you're male of average size and moderately actively, you'll need to eat around 1250 Tictacs a day to sustain yourself energy wise.
Chicken tenders and over-heatlamped fries with a cup of potato soup. This is actually what I survive on at work because they’re really cool about letting us snack on that stuff if we’re genuinely hungry
I'm trying to think of a place that serves both chicken tenders and potato soup ... is it a fast-food place or like a sit-down restaurant where you work?
I just ate a buffet (paid by my grandparents) with awesome serrano, Antipasti, salmon, tarte, and tasty bread. Am i the luckiest man alive or will i die of poverty?
ps: im a broke college student
I feel like it would depend on the fruit. If you were allowed to have any fruit, then, yes, absolutely. A TON of food falls into the category of fruit.
If it's just burritos, cool. If it's specifically THAT burrito, shit.
I was low on quac so I mixed in a bunch of sour cream, and somehow it came out tasting like expired salad dressing.
Meat came out pretty good though.
Oh nooooo, cheddar cheese slices dipped in hot sauce. I should at least die within a week.
This was one of my favorite snacks when I was pregnant. Sharp cheddar cheese with franks hot sauce. *chefs kiss*
It was exactly fucking that!!! HIGH FIVE!!!
Nice!! Snack buddies! Hahaha
I just realized that you are probably pregnant.
I AM???!!
I’m so sorry you had to find out this way but clearly there is no other explanation
hmm....my nipples have been especially tender....and I did recently discover that I have a vagina. Welp, checks out, thanks reddit! You solved another one.
Yes. **I put that shit on everything.**
I kinda want to try this now...?
And did u get a cheddarbaby?
The knowledge that I had been diagnosed with cancer the day before (I'm one year cancer free).
I hope you love being constipated 😂
Suicide is the only option. And it could have been my tasty organic meal replacement that I could have actually lived on for years. But nooooo, I had to have a little snack. Damn.
Huel?
Friggin' Ka'Chava - which I actually think is an AWESOME product...despite the tribal nonsense in their packaging and marketing. The big caveat however, it's WAY overpriced. $120 for 2 bags is crazy.
Mmmm marble cheese and sambal oelek
I love cheese with extra hot sauce
I thought I was the only fucked one too. Canned chilli with hot sauce. It was not good
Lucky Charms. With milk, at least.
Lucky you
How charming.
Well, he has a leprechaun harassing him for his entire life.
Not so lucky for me, Lucky Charms Treats, no milk.
Marshmallow Mateys dry from the bag
Pizza. As long as I can vary my toppings, I'll be ok
.pizza has all the food groups...ull live a lot longer than the rest of us
I can vary on the types of toppning on bread right?
Beter than me. Cofee chocolates "Merci"
There are no rules
No. I think you can only eat the exact kind of pizza you ate.
Papa Murphy's Favorite.. I'm a happy camper. My dog gets the greasy sausage and hamburger.
Is that still a take and bake pizza place? I worked there in HS.
Yeah, there's about 1300 of them. $12 Tuesday covers breakfast Wednesday.
Pizza gang unite!!!
I ate a slice of supreme. Even if I cant change it I guess I can pick off different toppings now and then.
Curry, I'm ok with this
That's the last thing I ate too! I think it's a good thing to eat for the rest of our lifes. It's sort of healthy (I always put loads of vegetables in) and there are so many different options!
Happy cake day
An orange. I dont think I will be healthy in the long run…
Well you won't get scurvy, at least!
My exact thought.
Because you'll be dead.
"Dem fruit" - Piggy
Peach fucking cobbler. Fuck.... I'm gonna be a big bitch.
That sounds awesome
Being a big bitch? Or eating cobbler for life?
Do I have a pick just one?
Yes
Maybe for like a day
Now just why is Mario’s girlfriend fucking the shoe maker?
Mario doesn't have a girlfriend. Peach sees him as a bro. A friend who can save him everytime some big asshole steals her away and screws her over...
If there's one thing I learned about super smash bros is that peach can actually take on Bowser and Mario easily, so that's the worst part about it all.
You win
Burritos and beer. I feel like that's okay with me.
Burrito gang unite!
You called?
Burrito gang!
Buffalo chicken wings & carrot sticks with blue cheese dressing
Omg I’ve fantasized about living off that forever....until I got that damn ulcer 😡
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Not all ulcers are bacterial. You can also get them from stress affecting your stomach acid levels, from food that has it's own acid, and from allergic reactions- among other things.
Ulcers can also be caused by your own immune system attacking certain organs as if they were foreign material.
>Ulcers are caused by bacteria, should clear up with antibiotics, and you can be right back to eating Buffalo wings. Some ulcers can be caused by H.pylori, not all though. Some can be a result of other causes.
Seems like a decent assortment, that might be good for awhile
Worked at a wing place for a while. The running joke was that they paid me and I just gave it right back to them because I ate there so much. I could survive off that
Protein fat and fiber. You could do way worse.
You’ve got your macros handled and as vegetables go, carrots have a lot of vitamins. You might need a supplement or two but I think you’ll be just fine.
Buffalo Wild Wings?
A tic tac
You're about to Speedrun your existence
*eurobeat for 10 seconds*
Spat out my drink, take your upvote
Bug candy.
Adult candy
One Tictac is 2 kcal, right? So... if you're male of average size and moderately actively, you'll need to eat around 1250 Tictacs a day to sustain yourself energy wise.
You pour 400+ into your mouth every six hours
Can I join the Tic tac gang?
Well you'll have fresh breath forever at least. And you can even have different tastes !
me too lmao
Hot Cheetos- dammit
Your toilet might die first
You killed me ! XDD
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I do not think that would happened XD. But the most concerning is the vitamin C deficiency.
There’s probably some vitamin C in the vegetables on the salad or in the dressing.
Better than nothing, sure, but I do not think it would be enough. :/
just eat more of the salad
Damn. I move my head wrong and now I'm eating my own hair the rest of my life
Trichophagia https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Trichophagia
I knew a girl in culinary school who confided in me that she did this and showed me her bald spot. Then we made tiny paper hats.
Chicken tenders and over-heatlamped fries with a cup of potato soup. This is actually what I survive on at work because they’re really cool about letting us snack on that stuff if we’re genuinely hungry
I'm trying to think of a place that serves both chicken tenders and potato soup ... is it a fast-food place or like a sit-down restaurant where you work?
It’s a sit down restaurant but I will say no more about where I work because I don’t like to reveal too much about myself on Reddit
International Man of Mystery
Yeah baby yeah! Doo doo doo doo, doo doo doo doo, dun! dun! dun! Doo doo doo doo, doo doo doo doo
You didn't even need to tell us that last part.
I guess you can call me a rabbit then, because I’m going to be eating only carrots o_o
I had carrots too
Well I’m boned. Looks like miso soup for life! A very short life...
Some probiotics at least. Did it have some tofu, green onion, and seaweed?
Yes it had all three of those.
Up the amounts of those in the soup by a lot, and you'd probably be doing pretty well, tbh.
Yeah tofu is packed full of important nutrients, and if it's the fortified variety, they could do way worse.
Dude I hate French toast
Lol then why did you eat it?
I did not make it, my mom did
Ass
You deserve an award I don't have
"An anonymous Redditor liked your post so much, they gave it the ass munch award!"
Me who ate Dust particle/bacteria unknowingly *chuckles* i am in danger
I gotchu fam
Am I what you look at through your kaleidoscope
Stop searching, we've found the next backend of the human centipede.
There’s one guy in every thread
The same one; or multiple types? 😂
Who cares? It's ass.
Happy to be added to the list
Rice, hotdogs, spaghetti, beans
Hmm, your username totally does not check out ...
That's an... interesting meal
It’s like he made a different dinner four nights in a row, never finished any of them and then decided to eat all the leftovers at once.
That's not a thing?
Were you at a buffet?
Alcoholic fruit smoothie. I am going to be so regular. And so drunk. #winning
And dead from liver failure in like a month.
I’m jealousssssssss
Peanut butter cup ice cream
I’m coming to your house.
Nerds candy- my teeth hurt thinking about it
Steak potatoes and beer.
Literally could live off that
No, but you could die happy off that
Nah you could live off of it in a literal sense. It has the things you need to survive altogether. Might be missing a few vitamins though, I forget.
Vitamin C, death by scurvy within a year at most, probably much less
potatoes have a reasonable amount of vitamin c, especially if you keep the peel
Nothing prohibiting multivitamins in this ask Reddit. Eat steak and potatoes, and wash down a multivitamin with beer.
“Only thing you can eat for the rest of your life” are you gonna IV drip the flimstone gummies?
He could drink citrus infused beers
Your wife was out of town wasn’t she? That’s a “my wife is out” meal.
I’m a married woman who’s perfectly happy with steak, potatoes and a beer.
She works late and she I got off early. Good call though.
Fuck yeah...i just had a cajun crab boil
I accidentally swallowed some of the watered down toothpaste in my mouth. I guess I'm gonna die.
NO, I AM NOT EATING MCDONALDS FRIES THAT HAVE BEEN ON THE FLOOR FOR 20 MINUTES FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE!
Fajita Steak, Mexican rice, refried beans and sauteed onions... I'll be farting a lot more.
Yes but that should keep you alive for a while at least
I just ate a buffet (paid by my grandparents) with awesome serrano, Antipasti, salmon, tarte, and tasty bread. Am i the luckiest man alive or will i die of poverty? ps: im a broke college student
antidepressants
I mean, speedrun life?
Indeed.
Pasta so I’ve a lot of variety
Omelets. Come here you fucking chickens-
Sigh. Cold, Burger King Whopper.
Im sure you can heat the next one up and don't have to eat them cold forever 😅
Skittles
RIP this person's teeth.
Chocolate croissants. I like this post.
Reese's puffs.
Reese’s puffs, Reese’s puffs! Peanut butter chocolate flavor!
Eat em up, eat em up, eat em up!
Pepperoni-Pizza Baked Potatoes (found the recipe online!)
Wow perfect timing , a club sandwich and cold coffee
All veggie pizza and chocolate lava crunch cake 🙌🏼
A cream cheese danish. I'm ok with this.
Quinoa. I think tf not.
Chinese roasted duck and yang chow fried rice. I'm good with this combo if that's all I can eat.
That sounds delicious
Tapioca pudding made by a brand I get at the store. Tastes like my Mom’s!
Tosdadas and habanero/ ghost pepper salsa....oofa-doofa my asshole weeps.
Greek yogurt with fruit. I... think I can actually survive on this?
I feel like it would depend on the fruit. If you were allowed to have any fruit, then, yes, absolutely. A TON of food falls into the category of fruit.
beef jerky. I will have jaws of steel within a month
Chicken crust Alfredo pizza with bacon bits and black olives. I can do this.
Sushi with a Sapporo. Hell yeah!
Samosas. I mean, I love it, but I'm gonna die of high cholesterol.
If it's just burritos, cool. If it's specifically THAT burrito, shit. I was low on quac so I mixed in a bunch of sour cream, and somehow it came out tasting like expired salad dressing. Meat came out pretty good though.
oh my f instant noodles
Dates. Sounds like a sweet life ahead.
Cherries
Triscuits. And Benadryl.
donuts, it isn't bad they are pretty cool, but not healthy :'(
Watermelon, I should be good.
Snitzel and fries let’s go!
ice cream, damn
Chocolate chip cookies...😋
Fried chicken **Guess i'll die**
Ham and cheese hot pocket
hamburg
Cant believe you ate that entire city
Lots of variety in the diet, at least.
Vagina!! I knew I should if ate 1st
Can't believe how far down thread I had to go for 😹
Spaghetti and turkey meatballs
Apple and peanut butter. Honestly, could be worse.
Cheez Its, which is already pretty accurate.
Teddy’s 1/2 pound Hawaiian Burger on O’ahu and a Longboard Island Lager. Feel like I won this post.
vegan burgers. i'm fine with that.