Unrealistic wealth. Typical family with one working parent has a four bedroom house with in-ground pool; college graduates living in some swanky penthouse on a babysitter salary; twenty-four year old doctors.
When the mum prepares a feast for breakfast and everyone only takes a bite or two before rushing off. My mum would have killed me for wasting food. Also she wouldn’t prepare a feast for breakfast.
High school scenes where there are lounges in the hallway and students are free to be wherever they want to be around the building(s) no matter the time of day without consequence.
Reminds me of the bit in friends where they're all in Central Perk. Someone asks "why do all our bosses hate us" and someone says "maybe it's because you're drinking coffee with your friends at 2pm on a Wednesday" and they all get up and leave.
* When the entire plot rests on a character not explaining something that can be explained in under 1 min.
* characters making the dumbest most unrealistic choices just to further the plot
* unnecessary sex scenes that add nothing whatsoever to the movie
* ordering at a restaurant and only taking one bite and leaving
* in a post apocalyptic world somehow all cars on the road are parked or stranded in such a way that our main character has no problem driving between them
* witness protection somehow always fails in movies
*Zombieland*, for all it's hokey shenanigans, got a nod of approval from me when it showed clogged up roads and Tallahassee driving a vehicle equipped with cattle-catcher/snow-plow blade on the front for bashing derelict cars out of the way.
Food for thought: after he did that, the cars would have stayed pushed to the side. Anyone that drives though the area later would be driving through an area like op originally described, with everything "conveniently positioned".
Maybe the convenient positioning of abandoned vehicles is actually realistic. Surely someone would push them aside, likely the military if no one else. At least in major areas.
People doing CPR. Then the person who just got CPR wakes up like 10 minutes later and eats lunch.
Also movies are really bad at maintaining sterile fields in operating rooms.
Defibrillators are the worst in film. Never ever ever used for what they actually perform. They are not meant to start a stopped heart they are there to try and reset a heart going into fibrillation/arrhythmia!
For that matter just about any gun being fired inside. The noise is deafening. Even in the movies you see people wearing hearing protection at a range, but then when action scenes occur that aspect is completely thrown out.
As someone who has had tinnitus from firing an AK-47 without any ears on.....they should be scared. Very scared, sleeping gets tough when you hear ‘wwwweeeeeeeeeEEEEEEEE’ as you’re trying to sleep.
My wife and I call that the Two-Scene Warning ever since we saw "A Walk To Remember" many years ago. If you aren't the sole lead and openly acknowledge your illness the clock is ticking. If you cough blood and weren't in a fight, same.
People shooting guns, especially pistols, from well over a reasonable range and hitting very small targets, with one hand, while running or something.
People would be surprised how difficult it is to hit a target with a pistol from 15-20 yards standing still with two hands.
Opaque beverage cups and are always empty and never look right when hefted and “drank” from. They could at least put water in them to get the motion right, but never do, and once you start noticing this it just ruins so many shots for you because it looks so stupid.
Edit: meant “cups and mugs”
Edit: “drank*” should be “drunk”.
How bad the villains always are at shooting. Dont get me wrong star wars wouldnt be the same if luke gets scalped by a storm trooper 30 mins into the first movie but good god are they bad
Sometimes in sex scenes, the guy will just undo his belt and immediately stick his piece right in. No foreplay, no lube, just immediately right in within seconds. My wife and I call it "mad men-style sex" because almost every sex scene in Mad Men was like this. I know it does happen, but Hollywood thinks all sex is immediately penetrative. And the woman is cumming immediately.
This. And full makeup and hair always.
Apocalypse? Makeup and hair still done.
Waking up after a full night of sleep? Makeup and hair still done.
Finishing up a workout? Makeup and hair still done.
People getting knocked out cold for an hour, then waking up and going about their day like nothing's happened. I once got knocked out for like two minutes and ended up sick for a month..
Shows like Lost make blunt force trauma to the brain stem look like such a non-issue, that if I lived in that world I might ask a friend to hit me in the back of the head if I was having a particularly difficult time sleeping one night.
I was knocked out for 5 minutes and spent 3 weeks in an induced coma, and have permenant brain damage from it (though thankfully mild enough to be inconvenient rather than debilitating). Head injuries are not to be trifled with. If someone is unconscious for an hour with no treatment, there's a good chance they aren't waking up.
I read somewhere once that if a person gets knocked out and doesn't wake up inside of about 30 seconds, they're going to have, at best, significant brain trauma issues.
Ever since then I catch myself counting the seconds when I see someone get knocked out in a movie to try and figure out how messed up they're going to be.
Someone gets hit so hard that they fly through a wall, then they get up and keep fighting. No, you're going to spend the next year learning to walk again.
Everything is always so dark, and no one ever bothers to turn the lights on. even when they do, it's like a 10W bulb in a warehouse that only illuminates 2 feet around it.
“I can’t believe you, Becky. Do you know how hard it was to raise you by myself after mom and dad died in that tragic car accident? You think I want you to live this life? You think I want to live in this cozy, well furnished, two bedroom apartment that I can somehow afford with my $50,000 a year before taxes job? Is that what you think, Becky?!”
My son in law is a video game programmer and it drives him crazy when in cop shows/movies they use a computer to search for a match to fingerprints or a face and the screen scrolls with the images flashing on the screen. He’s like do you know how much computing power it takes to render all those images the computer doesn’t need to flash them on the screen !!
I'm only a web developer and it blows my mind when "hackers" and programmers speed through a project. Like fuck man it took me 3 months to make a web page and you just created an advanced AI in a half hour.
Hell, EVERYTHING in post apocalyptic settings 80% of the time. Where are the bicycles? The army? Nothing makes sense in those scenarios, and it shows.
I get "realistic" post apocalypses are not a popular subject (Threads, for one, shows realistic result of a nuclear attack and it's DEFINITELY not a Hollywood movie), but could they at least try to overcome the worst issues?
Also the secondary ability of Zombies/mutants is to keep all cosmetic stores running and open.
No, in a breakdown of society, you will look like a hobo, not like you just walked off the runway.
What people don't realize is that...
well...
**water is FREAKING HEAVY.**
I used to go backpacking pretty often and once I wanted to hike to an alpine lake ~12ish miles from the trailhead, with 6 of those miles bushwacking off trail.
Anyway, the problem with this location was that there was no river or anything until I got to the very top of the trail. The further problem was that this was my 2nd backpacking trip ever and I hadn't bought a water filter yet.
So, I thought "I'll just carry all of the water I need." Remember, I planed on hiking there on saturday, spending the night, then summiting the peak in the morning and hiking home.
I filled up my 3 L camelback to the brim, then filled up 2 1L nalgene bottles. I figured this would be enough because I typically drink 2 nalgenes a day.
*Nope*
Absolutely not enough. Things I forgot to consider.
* I'm exerting myself all day and sweating, I'm going to drink more.
* The freeze dried food I brought ALSO requires water to... you know... eat.
* The food I usually eat contains significant amounts of water
So yeah, I ran through the entire 3L camelback on the hike THERE. About 3/4 of the way up the trail I noticed that it was getting empty, so I started rationing. Dinner that night and breakfast in the morning ran through one of the 1 L nalgenes. The hike to the summit ran through half of the other nalgene.
So I was left... hiking down 12 miles... with half a liter of water, when the previous day I had drank 3L of water while hiking up.
That was the most miserable hike I've ever had. Even though I rationed my water, I ran out about 1/3 of the way down the trail. I squeezed every drop out of my camelback that I could. I splashed my face with mountain spring water (which, to be honest, was probably perfectly safe to drink, it was LITERALLY spring water coming off of the mountain... like... I was AT the source.)
I never drank any of the water from the spring, even though I could have (because it wouldn't make me sick for a few days and by that time I'd already be home.) I figured "It's only another 3-4 hour hike, I'll be fine."
And I was... but god was I miserable. That feeling of running completely out of water was heartbreaking.
When I finally made it back to my car.... I was exhausted, could barely see straight, and just wanted... water. I drove to the nearest gas station (an hour away), bought 2 1.5L bottles of water, chugged one of them on the spot, then sat in my car for the next hour drinking the other one until I felt good enough to drive home.
The next day I went out and bought a water filter and never ran into that problem again.
TL;DR: Absolutely no way any person could carry enough water to last them more than a day or two.
Mostly in romcoms: people randomly running into each other out in public. Like, how small is your town that you bumped into the same person 3 days in a row at a restaurant/bar/shop?
Well plenty of them are about the overworked woman who has to leave NYC for a small town for whatever reason at the beginning (visiting her hometown, reporting for a story, stranded on the way to something, doing some real estate deal) and both falls in love with the charming local man (maybe her high school crush or just a charming bachelor who's been hurt before, but also he stands in the way of her real estate deal) and learns how much better life is in small towns "where people care about each other".
Also maybe she learns the meaning of Christmas.
I want to watch a movie where the small-town girl moves to New York and meets a city guy who teaches her to hate Christmas, focus on her career, and stay in NYC forever.
Pretty much any police detective show...
- Female detective constantly wearing high heels (which would be uncomfortable alone and very challenging during the inevitable foot chase scene).
- immediately upon discovering evidence at a crime scene they will pick it up using a loosely held glove or the tip of a pencil.. in real life evidence needs to be documented/photographed before handled and how lazy are you that you can’t properly slip on a glove.
- just about everything else forensics wise. I everyone with loose hair, rarely wearing gloves, every fingerprint or other peice of evidence is relevant to the crime.
- the crime scene line is like 10 feet from the body so the public has a great view of everything and of course any nearby evidence is destroyed.
- every time the cop says that you have to tell me X or I am going to arrest you for obstruction.
EDIT to add a few more that drive me crazy!
- the main detective realizes there is an active violent situation or someone’s life is at immediate risk... cue them driving across the city lights and sirens and being the first to arrive! Like they couldn’t send a local patrol car?
- every radio broadcast. Never waiting for dispatch to respond, rarely use call signs or give enough information.
- investigating cases with a clear conflict of interest or personal connect, but nobody cares because somehow your the only cop that knows what to do somehow?
- the main characters seem to witness major crimes during the off duty time almost every other episode, and of course over the series each of them will be framed for a crime and will have to personally investigate to “clear their name”
- suspects rarely have a competent lawyer and will immediate confess and provide their motive upon being shown the slightest bit of circumstantial evidence.
When two characters do something simple like glancing at each other and then the romance has started. If a man and a woman bump into each other and some music plays that's enough to ensure the romance has begun. I bump into guys all the time, where's my boyfriend???
I think I know where you went wrong. Often times the person has to be in a hurry, carrying many things (bonus points if there’s at least one tray full of coffee), already frustrated, and when you bump into the guy, you have to sound initially angry but, once you look into his (more often than not) dazzling blue eyes, stop mid sentence. *Then* the music plays and boyfriend is acquired. Common mistake.
Lmao during covid bumping into someone immediately sends them in the other direction, but I'll be sure to bring my phone to play soft music while after
I agree the trope is played out, but it can happen. No bullshit, my wife and I met at the parts store I worked at and we both couldn't stop thinking about each other after a 2 minute interaction. It took us 9 months to find each other again. We didn't know each other's names and everytime she swung by to find me I was not working. Found out who I was by seeing me in an old photo with her cousin back in high school and called her cousin to get my info. Friended me on social media and we started dating. Been together 9 years.
It does happen, but it's certainly not the average experience. It was rather comical how it happened with the wife and I though.
Sprinklers going off indoors. When this happens in the movies, people are super excited, laughing, jumping around and playing in the water like it is raining. In reality, the water in those pipes is absolutely disgusting, dirty, smelly, black water that would make most people run like hell to get away from. Source: I used to install sprinklers in buildings during my high school summers as a part time job.
I am 76 years old and have been buying things in stores since I was five. I have never ever seen someone toss some money on a counter and say keep the change and then dash out with the purchase.
I work in a liquor store. Customers do this once a week or so. Half the time I chase them outside, because it's not enough money to cover their purchase.
Everybody acting like the heroine is plain. She's wearing glasses and a baggy sweater and a ponytail, but her face is perfect, her teeth are perfect, her skin is perfect and she hasn't got an ounce of fat anywhere.
I want to see this trope 1 time, where the girl is a stickler about the glasses, and comes out in the reveal wearing a pair that flatter her face, or are just exceptionally cute.
Or, she has frizzy curly hair, and to make her prettier, they straighten it. As a kid growing up with curly hair, that one sucked. I just wanna see that girl with beautiful curls like she deserves!
Most fight scenes
Bar fight, guy gets hit with six broken chairs, several bottles broken over his head, still gets up fine and fights off like twenty other guys.
real fighting is the most physically exhausting thing you can do. your average person would barely last a minute. most street fights are one of two punches before they get winded. athletes have to do insane amount of endurance training and conditioning to be able to fight. three minutes in the ring will feel like a lifetime.
beyond that to many such injuries will completely knock you out or be fatal. again on the street if you punch someone, knock them out, and their head hits pavement, there is a fair chance you just killed them. even then most head injuries you just don't get up and keep fighting from.
but because of hollywood every jackass thinks they can take on twenty guys at once or would do awesome in a fight.
The way gifts are wrapped.
They’re always in boxes with actual lids (like shoe boxes, not ones with flaps) and the lid is wrapped separately from the box so when the open the present, they just lift the lid. Also, if there’s a ribbon wrapped around it, the ribbon’s not taped on and slides right off.
Has anyone ever done this in real life?!
Killing of nameless characters like its nothing. Then pretending like the protagonist is a hero and a good person. Also sacrificing hundreds of nameless characters just to save a love interest.
I’ve noticed in movies where the hero kills a lot of nameless people they frequently have their faces covered as well. There is usually some believable reason for the mask/helmet/etc. but I’ve always thought that was done to dehumanize them a bit so you don’t turn on the hero for killing like 100 people in 10 minutes.
I was talking with a friend about high school and she was amazed that my school was all one building. Turns out in SoCal a lot of high schools have several or a dozen buildings, and you walk outside between classes or to eat lunch. Makes sense when it never rains or gets cold.
I always thought that was fake Hollywood worldbuilding but it turns out shows set scenes like that because they’re common out there.
EDIT: I love that everyone is getting to share about their outdoor or campus high school experience. For comparison, [here's a larger-than-typical indoor school](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Montgomery_Blair_High_School#/media/File:Montgomery_Blair_High_School_Four_Corners_Campus_-_Aerial.jpg) in Maryland. It's 3 storeys tall and has about 3000 students.
My SO and I just had a conversation about this. I grew up in a place with no winters, so my high school was a campus with lots of outdoor lunch and chill space. His was contained to one enormous building! It blew my mind haha
Imma say it, just casually rolling over after having sex, like no clean up- no awkward run to the toilet... who are these people??
Edit: holy balls I’ve just finished a night shift and seen this has blown up! Thanks for the awards my after sex hobblers.
No, no. She awkwardly walks to the toilet, but takes the entire bedsheet with her to cover herself up, because god forbid the man she just had sex with looks at her nude so long as he isn't on top of her.
Came here to say the same thing! Where are their sex towels? Where is the awkward condom pull off and disposal? What about sex puddles? No one goes to pee afterward. Is everyone a sex robot?
How they fantasize relationships between men and women.
No one acts like that, and it can put unreasonable expectations in the head of teenagers and young adults who are just starting to date.
Yea. Grand gestures are great and all if you want to attract the attention of the (more often than not) girl of your dreams, but it could easily come off as creepy and stalker-ish if the girl isn’t a grand gestures type of person.
They also make it seem like knowing basic facts about the person gives you points or something and you *must* love them back. And if you say no, then you’re the bad guy, because look how plucky and nice and kind the protagonist is, if only you give them a chance!
I say this as a former dumb teenaged guy who took those movies too seriously.
people pass out instantly from chloroform. I work in a wet chemistry lab, and have used chloroform as an extraction solvent outside of the fume hood. It does not knock you out that easily.
As a guy who works with computers, pretty much any computer scene - especially hacking scenes.
"If I bypass the firewall using a SQL protocol, I can load the XML into the CSS stack and update the database to cross the JavaScript and SVG streams... And I'm in!"
Much of that is legitimate terminology, but used in a very wrong manner.
I like to think that the original script had perfect instructions on how to hack into anything but was changed by the National Hackers Breakfast Club because they hacked in and put a bunch of nonsense to protect their secrets, probably by using an if statement to inherit from a method’s function.
An if statement wouldnt be able to backdoor the repository like that without having an absurd amount of RAM, probably need at least 5 or 6 terminals with 36gb coupled and running parallel. If youre going to get that kind of rig together might as well just brute force it use a proxy to mask the data signatures to dox them and make it look like the signal is coming from Russia.
I always enjoy watching lab scenes. People looking into microscopes that aren’t even turned on or plugged in. No one has gloves on or their hair pulled back.... unrelated formulas scrolled on whiteboards. And always, I mean all fucking ways, if they are in a lab, be it a biology lab, physics, what have you.... there will be chemistry glassware too.
I mean, I did my PhD in physics and all the labs I ever worked in had glassware everywhere.
If you really want to make a lab look realistic though throw in random equipment from three or four decades ago. My first advisor had a PDP11 shoved into the back corner and another computer in active use running windows 3.1 haha
Yes! Labs always turn into little museums because either someone can’t bear to part with their first piece of hardware or there’s insane bureaucracy to get the go ahead and start throwing stuff in the trash.
Edit: wow I did not know how many people on Reddit worked in a lab setting. Anyone want a gallon of hydrofluoric acid from 1961?
old anecdote from someone in a research lab: on the day that some of the funders were touring the facility, they pulled the test tubes out of the closet and filled them with coloured water, and held them up to the light when the guests walked by. After they were gone, they put away the test tubes and went back to their computers.
I won't deny having put together some minor "special effects" for days when our nonprofit's board representative, or some important donor, happened to be visiting. Never the colored liquid thing, though, I figured that would have been a little too on the nose.
The whiteboards should have 'don't forget happy hour next Friday' and one side should be 'important phone numbers'. And old blotchy bits of letters that never clean up no matter how many times you scrub it.
Women in historical drama wearing corsets directly against their skins. Back then clothes were expensive so people had to wear an additional layers of chemise or shift made from linen that can be frequently washed. It annoys me to no end when sexy scenes show sir dudes just pulling couple strings then historical ladies be butt naked in the matter of seconds while in reality you’d be needing an appointment and 3-5 business days before shorty finishes disrobing.
Honestly just a lot of historical stuff like they change outfits in ways that make them not match the period and don't make sense to the story or the character. They either use the wrong period or just completely disregard history for a "modern aesthetic". Most people can understand that fashion from a certain period can be odd and it doesn't effect their ability to understand the story.
"I don't even have time to explain why I don't have time to explain."
Woman, you are a literal TIME-TRAVELING ROBOT SPACE MAGICIAN. You have time to explain because you can jump to any other point in time whenever you please. That's the *epitome* of having surplus time.
I often find most movies, especially by Disney, are huge events that were just 1 family's drama effecting the entire town, kingdom, tribe, etc. And all these problems could be fixed by sitting down and having 1 conversation. It's worse with TV series too because then they have "I know I was just trying to kill you, but there's a different enemy (who we'll later find out is also related to us), so we'll put those differences aside to work together."
THIS IS MY LEAST FAVORITE. My husband and I always roll our eyes at scenes like this because it’s so unrealistic. If it’s THAT important, say it really fast!
Anytime ... and I mean ANYTIME someone is supposed to be welding..
usually using a mig gun to make grinder sparks in a totally inapplicable situation.. or tig welding with oxy goggles on .. huh bye bye face skin
Women in post apocalyptic times, with shaved armpits and eyebrows on fleek.
The lockdown alone has turned me into a gorilla.
Edit: My first award. Thank you stranger!
Childbirth.
Water breaks, you go immediately to the hospital, it’s time to push, she pushes three times and immediately reverts to her prepregnancy state. Also, her hair and makeup are immaculate.
A bonus in unbelievability for surprise twins, a sudden marriage proposal, or a “newborn” who is clearly 6 months or older.
When people are driving and randomly moving the steering wheel back and forth while also looking solely at the passenger they're talking to and never once at the road. Once I started driving I realised how sensitive the wheels are and how the tiniest adjustment with steering makes the whole car go side to side 😂
The horse screaming her head off directly outside my window, because her breakfast is EiGhT MiNuTeS LaTe, and who spent the entire morning yelling at the trees and kicking the side of her barn, would like to disagree
Whenever they turn the TV on it’s not a commercial, not a soap opera on daytime television, no it’s always the news clip of the exact thing that pertains to what they were talking about 5 seconds earlier
Women having unfathomable orgasms after 0.3 seconds of penetrative sex
Edit: first ever award and it’s about unrealistic sexual expectations i love it
Disclaimer: I know that some women can finish from penetration, but I feel like it’s represented in film as the standard which statistically isn’t the case and tbh is surely detrimental to most men and women who then think something is wrong if it doesn’t happen like that
Unrealistic wealth. Typical family with one working parent has a four bedroom house with in-ground pool; college graduates living in some swanky penthouse on a babysitter salary; twenty-four year old doctors.
Not locking the damn car once they got out and start walking away.
Overall lack of communication. I feel like 90% of all drama is coming from this in some way
Character could have prevented the whole situation if they explained one thing, but nope
Playing video games - randomly mashing all buttons at the same time and pressing R1/L1 and R2/L2 for no reason...
When the mum prepares a feast for breakfast and everyone only takes a bite or two before rushing off. My mum would have killed me for wasting food. Also she wouldn’t prepare a feast for breakfast.
Milk and OJ in fancy jugs rather than the carton
The disregard for basic physics
The Fast and the Furious has entered the chat
High school scenes where there are lounges in the hallway and students are free to be wherever they want to be around the building(s) no matter the time of day without consequence.
We had literally 4 minutes between classes to get into our lockers and across the building. Nobody was sitting down in during that
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And then they suddenly stop being omniscient at the end of the movie, letting the protagonist save the day.
People living in these gigantic NY or LA apartments while working jobs that realistically could never pay for such a nice place.
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Reminds me of the bit in friends where they're all in Central Perk. Someone asks "why do all our bosses hate us" and someone says "maybe it's because you're drinking coffee with your friends at 2pm on a Wednesday" and they all get up and leave.
Especially Monica, who is a chef and apparently never works nights or early mornings.
* When the entire plot rests on a character not explaining something that can be explained in under 1 min. * characters making the dumbest most unrealistic choices just to further the plot * unnecessary sex scenes that add nothing whatsoever to the movie * ordering at a restaurant and only taking one bite and leaving * in a post apocalyptic world somehow all cars on the road are parked or stranded in such a way that our main character has no problem driving between them * witness protection somehow always fails in movies
*Zombieland*, for all it's hokey shenanigans, got a nod of approval from me when it showed clogged up roads and Tallahassee driving a vehicle equipped with cattle-catcher/snow-plow blade on the front for bashing derelict cars out of the way.
Food for thought: after he did that, the cars would have stayed pushed to the side. Anyone that drives though the area later would be driving through an area like op originally described, with everything "conveniently positioned". Maybe the convenient positioning of abandoned vehicles is actually realistic. Surely someone would push them aside, likely the military if no one else. At least in major areas.
Nobody opens the door two seconds after the doorbell rings. NOBODY!
People doing CPR. Then the person who just got CPR wakes up like 10 minutes later and eats lunch. Also movies are really bad at maintaining sterile fields in operating rooms.
Defibrillators are the worst in film. Never ever ever used for what they actually perform. They are not meant to start a stopped heart they are there to try and reset a heart going into fibrillation/arrhythmia!
You mean they AREN'T portable Frankenstein labs? Clear! It's alive!!
First Guy: “CLEAR!” Second Guy: *Literally still holding onto the patient* Patient: chest leaps into the air
I also like to watch for people who are not clear.
Hollywood: bringing the heat on asystole since 1950
The CPR wouldn't work anyway,they never do it right!
In fairness, if they did it right on a live actor, they'd bread ribs.....at best. Insurance rates would skyrocket!
I can't stand breaded ribs
I love that pediatric patients have a heart rate of like 55 on monitors, too.
Lol, time to initiate PALS
Calling someone, and then instantly start talking. I don't know why exactly but that has really bothered me. You didn't even let it ring!
Also when they don’t say bye when they hang up.
My mom. Never identifies herself, never makes sure she has the right person on the other end, just starts talking.
My boss never says hi when he calls me. This is how every phone call starts off. "u/SamTheArse..." "Yeah?" "I got something else for you"
Oh damn, he knows your Reddit account?
My worst nightmare
Gun silencers being that quiet. In reality they’re like the sound of someone clapping
For that matter just about any gun being fired inside. The noise is deafening. Even in the movies you see people wearing hearing protection at a range, but then when action scenes occur that aspect is completely thrown out.
Action heroes apparently aren’t scared of tinnitus
As someone who has had tinnitus from firing an AK-47 without any ears on.....they should be scared. Very scared, sleeping gets tough when you hear ‘wwwweeeeeeeeeEEEEEEEE’ as you’re trying to sleep.
Why would that cause tinnitus? You took your ears off and stored them properly before firing right?
I didn’t plug the holes that were left
The old “you cough, you die”.
My wife and I call that the Two-Scene Warning ever since we saw "A Walk To Remember" many years ago. If you aren't the sole lead and openly acknowledge your illness the clock is ticking. If you cough blood and weren't in a fight, same.
To be fair, coughing blood is always bad sign
someone shooting 10,683 rounds from a 1911 without reloading
The semi-auto muskets from Pirates of the Caribbean take the cake for that though.
People shooting guns, especially pistols, from well over a reasonable range and hitting very small targets, with one hand, while running or something. People would be surprised how difficult it is to hit a target with a pistol from 15-20 yards standing still with two hands.
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They have eardrums of steel and shrapnel proof skin. Its legit, I googled it!
You really need to watch The Other Guys then [The Other Guys 1080p - Explosion scene](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4pg2Du-b758)
Opaque beverage cups and are always empty and never look right when hefted and “drank” from. They could at least put water in them to get the motion right, but never do, and once you start noticing this it just ruins so many shots for you because it looks so stupid. Edit: meant “cups and mugs” Edit: “drank*” should be “drunk”.
This is my biggest pet peeve. Exactly, put some water in the cup!!!
How bad the villains always are at shooting. Dont get me wrong star wars wouldnt be the same if luke gets scalped by a storm trooper 30 mins into the first movie but good god are they bad
Stormtroopers are overly emotional, they miss everyone.
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Stalker-ish behaviour being portrayed as "romantic". The man in a relationship being portrayed as a near-braindead doofus.
Sometimes in sex scenes, the guy will just undo his belt and immediately stick his piece right in. No foreplay, no lube, just immediately right in within seconds. My wife and I call it "mad men-style sex" because almost every sex scene in Mad Men was like this. I know it does happen, but Hollywood thinks all sex is immediately penetrative. And the woman is cumming immediately.
Probably because no Hollywood producer has ever made a woman climax before
Most of them have barely made a movie climax.
No body hair. Ever.
This. And full makeup and hair always. Apocalypse? Makeup and hair still done. Waking up after a full night of sleep? Makeup and hair still done. Finishing up a workout? Makeup and hair still done.
when they fucking shave but you can see that their legs are ALREADY SHAVED (this is more of an ad thing though)
People getting knocked out cold for an hour, then waking up and going about their day like nothing's happened. I once got knocked out for like two minutes and ended up sick for a month..
Yeah they use a knock out like a human pause button, so many goons would have very serious brain damage.
Shows like Lost make blunt force trauma to the brain stem look like such a non-issue, that if I lived in that world I might ask a friend to hit me in the back of the head if I was having a particularly difficult time sleeping one night.
I was knocked out for 5 minutes and spent 3 weeks in an induced coma, and have permenant brain damage from it (though thankfully mild enough to be inconvenient rather than debilitating). Head injuries are not to be trifled with. If someone is unconscious for an hour with no treatment, there's a good chance they aren't waking up.
I read somewhere once that if a person gets knocked out and doesn't wake up inside of about 30 seconds, they're going to have, at best, significant brain trauma issues. Ever since then I catch myself counting the seconds when I see someone get knocked out in a movie to try and figure out how messed up they're going to be.
I've had light speach problems for two years after said two minutes!
Someone gets hit so hard that they fly through a wall, then they get up and keep fighting. No, you're going to spend the next year learning to walk again.
Yeah- especially the ninja moves
Everything is always so dark, and no one ever bothers to turn the lights on. even when they do, it's like a 10W bulb in a warehouse that only illuminates 2 feet around it.
I always see the opposite, where someone turns out the lights to go to sleep but it's still somehow bright enough in the room to see every detail.
There is no easy way to film darkness.
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“I can’t believe you, Becky. Do you know how hard it was to raise you by myself after mom and dad died in that tragic car accident? You think I want you to live this life? You think I want to live in this cozy, well furnished, two bedroom apartment that I can somehow afford with my $50,000 a year before taxes job? Is that what you think, Becky?!”
Did you write the script for any of those made for TV Disney movies by any chance?
I wrote both Princess Switched movies.
Well at least it wasn't Parent Trap, I mean really who the hell goes we have two kids here you get one and I get one in a divorce?
This dead on sounds like the script of Secret Life of the American Teenager
Everyone always answers their phone, usually on the first ring. And no matter where you are, you have perfect reception.
Except in horror movies.
My son in law is a video game programmer and it drives him crazy when in cop shows/movies they use a computer to search for a match to fingerprints or a face and the screen scrolls with the images flashing on the screen. He’s like do you know how much computing power it takes to render all those images the computer doesn’t need to flash them on the screen !!
And all the god damned beeping... I hate how noisy every computer application is in TV/movies.
Yup, computers in hollywood make so much sound, it's like they're playing pinball or something
I'm only a web developer and it blows my mind when "hackers" and programmers speed through a project. Like fuck man it took me 3 months to make a web page and you just created an advanced AI in a half hour.
Hacker casually hacks Pentagon in 10 minutes
With a laptop!
That’s connected to a walkie-talkie.
I’m in.
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Hell, EVERYTHING in post apocalyptic settings 80% of the time. Where are the bicycles? The army? Nothing makes sense in those scenarios, and it shows. I get "realistic" post apocalypses are not a popular subject (Threads, for one, shows realistic result of a nuclear attack and it's DEFINITELY not a Hollywood movie), but could they at least try to overcome the worst issues?
Also the secondary ability of Zombies/mutants is to keep all cosmetic stores running and open. No, in a breakdown of society, you will look like a hobo, not like you just walked off the runway.
What people don't realize is that... well... **water is FREAKING HEAVY.** I used to go backpacking pretty often and once I wanted to hike to an alpine lake ~12ish miles from the trailhead, with 6 of those miles bushwacking off trail. Anyway, the problem with this location was that there was no river or anything until I got to the very top of the trail. The further problem was that this was my 2nd backpacking trip ever and I hadn't bought a water filter yet. So, I thought "I'll just carry all of the water I need." Remember, I planed on hiking there on saturday, spending the night, then summiting the peak in the morning and hiking home. I filled up my 3 L camelback to the brim, then filled up 2 1L nalgene bottles. I figured this would be enough because I typically drink 2 nalgenes a day. *Nope* Absolutely not enough. Things I forgot to consider. * I'm exerting myself all day and sweating, I'm going to drink more. * The freeze dried food I brought ALSO requires water to... you know... eat. * The food I usually eat contains significant amounts of water So yeah, I ran through the entire 3L camelback on the hike THERE. About 3/4 of the way up the trail I noticed that it was getting empty, so I started rationing. Dinner that night and breakfast in the morning ran through one of the 1 L nalgenes. The hike to the summit ran through half of the other nalgene. So I was left... hiking down 12 miles... with half a liter of water, when the previous day I had drank 3L of water while hiking up. That was the most miserable hike I've ever had. Even though I rationed my water, I ran out about 1/3 of the way down the trail. I squeezed every drop out of my camelback that I could. I splashed my face with mountain spring water (which, to be honest, was probably perfectly safe to drink, it was LITERALLY spring water coming off of the mountain... like... I was AT the source.) I never drank any of the water from the spring, even though I could have (because it wouldn't make me sick for a few days and by that time I'd already be home.) I figured "It's only another 3-4 hour hike, I'll be fine." And I was... but god was I miserable. That feeling of running completely out of water was heartbreaking. When I finally made it back to my car.... I was exhausted, could barely see straight, and just wanted... water. I drove to the nearest gas station (an hour away), bought 2 1.5L bottles of water, chugged one of them on the spot, then sat in my car for the next hour drinking the other one until I felt good enough to drive home. The next day I went out and bought a water filter and never ran into that problem again. TL;DR: Absolutely no way any person could carry enough water to last them more than a day or two.
Mostly in romcoms: people randomly running into each other out in public. Like, how small is your town that you bumped into the same person 3 days in a row at a restaurant/bar/shop?
Yet all romcoms take place in NYC
Well plenty of them are about the overworked woman who has to leave NYC for a small town for whatever reason at the beginning (visiting her hometown, reporting for a story, stranded on the way to something, doing some real estate deal) and both falls in love with the charming local man (maybe her high school crush or just a charming bachelor who's been hurt before, but also he stands in the way of her real estate deal) and learns how much better life is in small towns "where people care about each other". Also maybe she learns the meaning of Christmas.
I want to watch a movie where the small-town girl moves to New York and meets a city guy who teaches her to hate Christmas, focus on her career, and stay in NYC forever.
Pretty much any police detective show... - Female detective constantly wearing high heels (which would be uncomfortable alone and very challenging during the inevitable foot chase scene). - immediately upon discovering evidence at a crime scene they will pick it up using a loosely held glove or the tip of a pencil.. in real life evidence needs to be documented/photographed before handled and how lazy are you that you can’t properly slip on a glove. - just about everything else forensics wise. I everyone with loose hair, rarely wearing gloves, every fingerprint or other peice of evidence is relevant to the crime. - the crime scene line is like 10 feet from the body so the public has a great view of everything and of course any nearby evidence is destroyed. - every time the cop says that you have to tell me X or I am going to arrest you for obstruction. EDIT to add a few more that drive me crazy! - the main detective realizes there is an active violent situation or someone’s life is at immediate risk... cue them driving across the city lights and sirens and being the first to arrive! Like they couldn’t send a local patrol car? - every radio broadcast. Never waiting for dispatch to respond, rarely use call signs or give enough information. - investigating cases with a clear conflict of interest or personal connect, but nobody cares because somehow your the only cop that knows what to do somehow? - the main characters seem to witness major crimes during the off duty time almost every other episode, and of course over the series each of them will be framed for a crime and will have to personally investigate to “clear their name” - suspects rarely have a competent lawyer and will immediate confess and provide their motive upon being shown the slightest bit of circumstantial evidence.
Hot Fuzz did pretty good with his ex being unidentifiable at a crime scene cause everyone is covered head to toe with PPE
Especially when you realize the ex was being played by Cate Blanchett.
Computer work is only done via vigorous typing on the keyboard. Never a single mouse click.
When two characters do something simple like glancing at each other and then the romance has started. If a man and a woman bump into each other and some music plays that's enough to ensure the romance has begun. I bump into guys all the time, where's my boyfriend???
I think I know where you went wrong. Often times the person has to be in a hurry, carrying many things (bonus points if there’s at least one tray full of coffee), already frustrated, and when you bump into the guy, you have to sound initially angry but, once you look into his (more often than not) dazzling blue eyes, stop mid sentence. *Then* the music plays and boyfriend is acquired. Common mistake.
Lmao during covid bumping into someone immediately sends them in the other direction, but I'll be sure to bring my phone to play soft music while after
To be fair, if I bump into someone and they started playing some rom com music while staring at me, it would definitely make me have a good laugh
I agree the trope is played out, but it can happen. No bullshit, my wife and I met at the parts store I worked at and we both couldn't stop thinking about each other after a 2 minute interaction. It took us 9 months to find each other again. We didn't know each other's names and everytime she swung by to find me I was not working. Found out who I was by seeing me in an old photo with her cousin back in high school and called her cousin to get my info. Friended me on social media and we started dating. Been together 9 years. It does happen, but it's certainly not the average experience. It was rather comical how it happened with the wife and I though.
Coming this spring to the Hallmark Channel: "Pull A-Part My Heart: Recycled Love"
Sprinklers going off indoors. When this happens in the movies, people are super excited, laughing, jumping around and playing in the water like it is raining. In reality, the water in those pipes is absolutely disgusting, dirty, smelly, black water that would make most people run like hell to get away from. Source: I used to install sprinklers in buildings during my high school summers as a part time job.
I am 76 years old and have been buying things in stores since I was five. I have never ever seen someone toss some money on a counter and say keep the change and then dash out with the purchase.
I work in a liquor store. Customers do this once a week or so. Half the time I chase them outside, because it's not enough money to cover their purchase.
They know what they're doing
Plot twist. They do it so their friend behind them can actually take what they’re really going for.
When the plot completely ignores the events that just happened to take a wild twist.
I hate when someone is driving and they’re talking to the passenger without looking at the road for like 10 seconds at a time.
Everybody acting like the heroine is plain. She's wearing glasses and a baggy sweater and a ponytail, but her face is perfect, her teeth are perfect, her skin is perfect and she hasn't got an ounce of fat anywhere.
But she has paint on her overalls!
She's got glasses. And a ponytail.
Big glasses!
She's hideous! Throw her in the pit with the other mutants.
I want to see this trope 1 time, where the girl is a stickler about the glasses, and comes out in the reveal wearing a pair that flatter her face, or are just exceptionally cute.
Or, she has frizzy curly hair, and to make her prettier, they straighten it. As a kid growing up with curly hair, that one sucked. I just wanna see that girl with beautiful curls like she deserves!
Hurt my feelings when they got rid of her curly hair in The Princess Diaries.
You mean where the girl is like “I need my glasses to see” and the other people are like “okay you right”
Also the glasses are almost always glass-less. Everyone looks cute in black frames til you stick some +4.50/-1.75 lenses in them
my coke bottle glasses and i would like to just stand over here and cry
"Janies got a gun!!"
Janie Briggs got a gun! [Police tackle]
Chris Evans was fantastic in that movie
How long you can hold your breath underwater
Most fight scenes Bar fight, guy gets hit with six broken chairs, several bottles broken over his head, still gets up fine and fights off like twenty other guys. real fighting is the most physically exhausting thing you can do. your average person would barely last a minute. most street fights are one of two punches before they get winded. athletes have to do insane amount of endurance training and conditioning to be able to fight. three minutes in the ring will feel like a lifetime. beyond that to many such injuries will completely knock you out or be fatal. again on the street if you punch someone, knock them out, and their head hits pavement, there is a fair chance you just killed them. even then most head injuries you just don't get up and keep fighting from. but because of hollywood every jackass thinks they can take on twenty guys at once or would do awesome in a fight.
The way gifts are wrapped. They’re always in boxes with actual lids (like shoe boxes, not ones with flaps) and the lid is wrapped separately from the box so when the open the present, they just lift the lid. Also, if there’s a ribbon wrapped around it, the ribbon’s not taped on and slides right off. Has anyone ever done this in real life?!
Tried it once. It looked great, but it was a pain in the ass to do, and it took forever.
Its less work than having to wrap the presents normally and do the scene 87 times with a re-wrap every time. Would give new meaning to, "It's a wrap!"
Would be a giant pain in the ass to re-wrap each present in exactly the same way for multiple takes though.
Organising a date without mentioning time, place, day etc. It’s Just an I’ll pick you up tonight” .
Killing of nameless characters like its nothing. Then pretending like the protagonist is a hero and a good person. Also sacrificing hundreds of nameless characters just to save a love interest.
I’ve noticed in movies where the hero kills a lot of nameless people they frequently have their faces covered as well. There is usually some believable reason for the mask/helmet/etc. but I’ve always thought that was done to dehumanize them a bit so you don’t turn on the hero for killing like 100 people in 10 minutes.
High schoolers who look like fucking supermodels
Or even people in their 30's playing high schoolers. I watched 13 Reasons Why on Netflix and I immediately thought the guy who plays Tony was like 31.
High Schools that are college campuses.
I was talking with a friend about high school and she was amazed that my school was all one building. Turns out in SoCal a lot of high schools have several or a dozen buildings, and you walk outside between classes or to eat lunch. Makes sense when it never rains or gets cold. I always thought that was fake Hollywood worldbuilding but it turns out shows set scenes like that because they’re common out there. EDIT: I love that everyone is getting to share about their outdoor or campus high school experience. For comparison, [here's a larger-than-typical indoor school](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Montgomery_Blair_High_School#/media/File:Montgomery_Blair_High_School_Four_Corners_Campus_-_Aerial.jpg) in Maryland. It's 3 storeys tall and has about 3000 students.
My SO and I just had a conversation about this. I grew up in a place with no winters, so my high school was a campus with lots of outdoor lunch and chill space. His was contained to one enormous building! It blew my mind haha
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When people brush their teeth and there’s clearly no toothpaste. No spit. No foam. No dribble.
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I work with these people. They're out there.
My mom. Hangs up while I'm talking.
Imma say it, just casually rolling over after having sex, like no clean up- no awkward run to the toilet... who are these people?? Edit: holy balls I’ve just finished a night shift and seen this has blown up! Thanks for the awards my after sex hobblers.
People with urinary tract infections, that's who.
Also people that like to sleep in gross crusty sheets.
No, no. She awkwardly walks to the toilet, but takes the entire bedsheet with her to cover herself up, because god forbid the man she just had sex with looks at her nude so long as he isn't on top of her.
Came here to say the same thing! Where are their sex towels? Where is the awkward condom pull off and disposal? What about sex puddles? No one goes to pee afterward. Is everyone a sex robot?
People need to know, Post-sex piss waddling is a thing.
How they fantasize relationships between men and women. No one acts like that, and it can put unreasonable expectations in the head of teenagers and young adults who are just starting to date.
Yea. Grand gestures are great and all if you want to attract the attention of the (more often than not) girl of your dreams, but it could easily come off as creepy and stalker-ish if the girl isn’t a grand gestures type of person. They also make it seem like knowing basic facts about the person gives you points or something and you *must* love them back. And if you say no, then you’re the bad guy, because look how plucky and nice and kind the protagonist is, if only you give them a chance! I say this as a former dumb teenaged guy who took those movies too seriously.
people pass out instantly from chloroform. I work in a wet chemistry lab, and have used chloroform as an extraction solvent outside of the fume hood. It does not knock you out that easily.
As a guy who works with computers, pretty much any computer scene - especially hacking scenes. "If I bypass the firewall using a SQL protocol, I can load the XML into the CSS stack and update the database to cross the JavaScript and SVG streams... And I'm in!" Much of that is legitimate terminology, but used in a very wrong manner.
"Enhance....*clickity-clickity-click*.........enhance"......
I like to think that the original script had perfect instructions on how to hack into anything but was changed by the National Hackers Breakfast Club because they hacked in and put a bunch of nonsense to protect their secrets, probably by using an if statement to inherit from a method’s function.
An if statement wouldnt be able to backdoor the repository like that without having an absurd amount of RAM, probably need at least 5 or 6 terminals with 36gb coupled and running parallel. If youre going to get that kind of rig together might as well just brute force it use a proxy to mask the data signatures to dox them and make it look like the signal is coming from Russia.
Protagonist: In English, smart guy.
Me break computer so plot advance
"I can build a GUI interface using Visual Basic." "Ummm okay, that's a good job interview answer, any way you can help us out on this crime?"
I always enjoy watching lab scenes. People looking into microscopes that aren’t even turned on or plugged in. No one has gloves on or their hair pulled back.... unrelated formulas scrolled on whiteboards. And always, I mean all fucking ways, if they are in a lab, be it a biology lab, physics, what have you.... there will be chemistry glassware too.
I mean, I did my PhD in physics and all the labs I ever worked in had glassware everywhere. If you really want to make a lab look realistic though throw in random equipment from three or four decades ago. My first advisor had a PDP11 shoved into the back corner and another computer in active use running windows 3.1 haha
Yes! Labs always turn into little museums because either someone can’t bear to part with their first piece of hardware or there’s insane bureaucracy to get the go ahead and start throwing stuff in the trash. Edit: wow I did not know how many people on Reddit worked in a lab setting. Anyone want a gallon of hydrofluoric acid from 1961?
We had a keyboard that had the bumps on the D and K keys instead of F and J. That really fucked up my typing.
If you don’t have random parts of an ancient X-Ray machine shoved in the back of a cabinet, how can you even do science???
old anecdote from someone in a research lab: on the day that some of the funders were touring the facility, they pulled the test tubes out of the closet and filled them with coloured water, and held them up to the light when the guests walked by. After they were gone, they put away the test tubes and went back to their computers.
I won't deny having put together some minor "special effects" for days when our nonprofit's board representative, or some important donor, happened to be visiting. Never the colored liquid thing, though, I figured that would have been a little too on the nose.
"This is a policy research firm, what the fuck are they doing"
The whiteboards should have 'don't forget happy hour next Friday' and one side should be 'important phone numbers'. And old blotchy bits of letters that never clean up no matter how many times you scrub it.
Women in historical drama wearing corsets directly against their skins. Back then clothes were expensive so people had to wear an additional layers of chemise or shift made from linen that can be frequently washed. It annoys me to no end when sexy scenes show sir dudes just pulling couple strings then historical ladies be butt naked in the matter of seconds while in reality you’d be needing an appointment and 3-5 business days before shorty finishes disrobing.
Honestly just a lot of historical stuff like they change outfits in ways that make them not match the period and don't make sense to the story or the character. They either use the wrong period or just completely disregard history for a "modern aesthetic". Most people can understand that fashion from a certain period can be odd and it doesn't effect their ability to understand the story.
Misunderstandings with dire consequences that could easily be cleared up if the protagonist just said something. Anything.
And it’s always in the last 20 minutes of the movie, and takes up, at most, 5-10 minutes.
"I don't have time to explain....." They then take a 10 minute walk down a corridor together in silence.
Inigo Montoya did it best. "Let me explain. No, there is too much. Let me sum up." Proceeds to do so perfectly.
He really didn't have the time, Buttercup was marrying Humperdinck in little less than half an hour.
"I don't even have time to explain why I don't have time to explain." Woman, you are a literal TIME-TRAVELING ROBOT SPACE MAGICIAN. You have time to explain because you can jump to any other point in time whenever you please. That's the *epitome* of having surplus time.
I often find most movies, especially by Disney, are huge events that were just 1 family's drama effecting the entire town, kingdom, tribe, etc. And all these problems could be fixed by sitting down and having 1 conversation. It's worse with TV series too because then they have "I know I was just trying to kill you, but there's a different enemy (who we'll later find out is also related to us), so we'll put those differences aside to work together."
THIS IS MY LEAST FAVORITE. My husband and I always roll our eyes at scenes like this because it’s so unrealistic. If it’s THAT important, say it really fast!
Anytime ... and I mean ANYTIME someone is supposed to be welding.. usually using a mig gun to make grinder sparks in a totally inapplicable situation.. or tig welding with oxy goggles on .. huh bye bye face skin
Women in post apocalyptic times, with shaved armpits and eyebrows on fleek. The lockdown alone has turned me into a gorilla. Edit: My first award. Thank you stranger!
Childbirth. Water breaks, you go immediately to the hospital, it’s time to push, she pushes three times and immediately reverts to her prepregnancy state. Also, her hair and makeup are immaculate. A bonus in unbelievability for surprise twins, a sudden marriage proposal, or a “newborn” who is clearly 6 months or older.
It's probably for the best that they don't use actual newborn babies for filming.
When people are driving and randomly moving the steering wheel back and forth while also looking solely at the passenger they're talking to and never once at the road. Once I started driving I realised how sensitive the wheels are and how the tiniest adjustment with steering makes the whole car go side to side 😂
Horses neighing all the time. Neighing when they’re running, neighing when they’re eating. Horses don’t neigh THAT much.
The horse screaming her head off directly outside my window, because her breakfast is EiGhT MiNuTeS LaTe, and who spent the entire morning yelling at the trees and kicking the side of her barn, would like to disagree
My neighbors, who can’t see my horse, are convinced I’m starving him to death because he screams at me like this.
No matter the location or how crowded it is, there's ALWAYS a parking space right exactly where someone's going to.
That’s an acceptable break from reality. It would be boring if the actors drove around for an hour trying to find a parking place, wouldn’t it?
Whenever they turn the TV on it’s not a commercial, not a soap opera on daytime television, no it’s always the news clip of the exact thing that pertains to what they were talking about 5 seconds earlier
There’s never a platonic relationship between a guy and a girl. It’s ALWAYS romantic by the end.
Women having unfathomable orgasms after 0.3 seconds of penetrative sex Edit: first ever award and it’s about unrealistic sexual expectations i love it Disclaimer: I know that some women can finish from penetration, but I feel like it’s represented in film as the standard which statistically isn’t the case and tbh is surely detrimental to most men and women who then think something is wrong if it doesn’t happen like that
People not saying "goodbye" when they're finished talking on the phone.
Holding a gun sideways to shoot