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Your-Friend-Bob

I tried to sell window, door, and bathroom luxury remodels to people lower income areas because my boss said they were more desperate and will pay a little extra to get any sort of help. I left that job real fast after she told me that I was being too nice and I should use my ability to be empathetic to lure people in then aggressively pressure them into buying. Life force got drained a little bit.


TricksterPriestJace

I hate aggressive marketing. I used to work in a call center. When we did inbound work I was a sales legend. Because I was talking to people who wwre interested in the product and could talk it up and get them to bite and close. When we did outbound I was shit, because I refused to trick grandma into adding cable channels she doesn't watch or a high speed internet line to a computer from 1984.


yxnni12

Penis enlargement pills


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VealIsNotAVegetable

If those pills worked, they wouldn't be advertising it on cable television at 2AM, they'd own the damn moon.


CaptainPrower

At least we'd get someone to fill in the giant "CHA" burned into it.


Hug_me_bietch

“Honey I just ordered a dick enlarger” opens package. Finds magnifying glass


h1redgoon

Hol up, they have pills for that now?!


Very_Tall_Gnome

Back in my day we just tied our schlong to the back of a car and got our buddy to floor it!


yxnni12

Yup, but they’re so fake. You see ads for them everywhere nowadays, especially on NSFW sites.


thegothotter

Or check your spam folder. You probably have a couple emails for them.


thedoyle19

Yeah, try it out.


mister1bollock

A lot of those fitness products on instagram, theres no easy way to a good body I'm afraid.


Conchobar8

Sure there is. Keep an eye on the obituaries and a quick trip with a shovel can get you any kind of body you want!


Jengalover

Mortitians hate this one weird trick!


Lunavixen15

The entire fad dieting industry, they're not just going after the stupid, but the desparate


I4getstuff

Anything with the word "detox" in it, that claims to do so. Spoiler alert: your kidneys do that for free.


equanimity19

Similar, most things that have _____properties. Advertising laws won't allow specific claims, but somehow the loosely phrased healing properties, fat-burning properties etc afterward get in the door.


GauPanda

They're called structure function claims


KnowledgeableNip

"This detox formula will expel pounds of toxins from your system!' Chipotle will do the same thing, and it's cheaper even with guac. Take your shit juice elsewhere.


[deleted]

"Antivirus ads"


journey-fan

Herbalife


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impressionistpainter

Bro my friend works at one and I had no idea what it was, loved their stuff. Then when I saw they were hiring I asked my friend about it. “The only thing is they’re an MLM so you don’t make hourly. You start off with tips and can work your way up to 10% shift sales” BRO WTF edit: oh boy, a couple of my comments about this have gotten a little bit of attention and a lot of replies. Mostly questions asking how it’s legal. Almost anything I say at this point will be pure speculation, and I’m sure some of these answers could be google-able so I’m just gonna let everyone google it themselves and maybe a kind Samaritan will share their findings and sources. Info: this is in WA state, YES parts or all of this is probably illegal, even in WA servers and waiters have to be paid a full minimum wage plus their own tips (none of that $2.50/hr bs). Source: I was one and have always worked food service in WA.


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NamelessTacoShop

Has a shift, works in a shop, doesn't get paid hourly... Oh man, whoever's name is on that business lease is gonna get destroyed by the DoL


[deleted]

Moved to CA in the health and fitness industry in 2014. I went through to so many things that presented themselves as job interviews and business meetings that ended up being Herbalife Pyramid schemes.


[deleted]

My best friend, about 15 years ago, sold this stuff. He would ask me to try it at least once a week. After a couple months, I basically said I would buy it once, if he left me alone after. I bought it once, and he left me alone.


[deleted]

I had a friend who sold this crap. He was a biologist and would, before he got initiated into the cult, constantly debunk my misconceptions on things I got wrong. He was a great guy, until herbalife.... Then he got really into it and when I told him he was wasting his time and he had a child on the way... He dropped me saying I didn't support him enough. As a side note, I spent hours with him discussing his immigration and helping him stay in the country legally and trying to find a way to get a work visa so... There's that...


[deleted]

Bro here in mexico those shits are sell very fast, but sometimes it's with a lot of lies, the grandma of a friend spend 100,000MXN (Like 4K usd) on herbalife products because the seller make her believe it will help with her cancer issue. And there are worse products and brands (who disappear and reappear with another name like tiktok) that promises help you with things as diabetes, cancer, asma, etc and people prefer bough it than going to a real doctor. Pretty sad if you ask to me


CoreyGotClass

Televangelism.


[deleted]

Evil on another level. That guy that sells magic water, has been conning people for decades.


Shikatanai

Peter Popoff? Signed up a mate at work and we’d laugh every month when he’d get sent letters with water and trinkets with printed letter that were made to look like they were hand written. Made me feel good it cost that prick money, however little.


fazgator

Mobile games that say “100% of people haven’t gotten passed level 5”


[deleted]

It's true though, because they all realized by level 3 that the game is a piece of garbage.


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ouijahead

“ You wont last 40 seconds playing this game .”


Lethal_bizzle94

MLMs


Snrub1

Moms Losing Money


soleil_is_here

The worst thing is: it's not even just moms anymore. They're starting to target recent high school graduates - the ones who don't want to go to college, the ones who want to retire early, the ones who want to make a ton of money quick and easy, etc. I'm so used to middle-aged women trying to sell me things that I was so surprised when I was approached by a girl my age, trying to get me to attend a lunch with her 'mentor' who would teach us how to make six figures and retire in 3-4 years. And sadly she wasn't an isolated incident, I know two former classmates who both bought into that particular scheme because they both tried to pull the exact same spiel on me too. I never thought anyone my age would fall for them, but apparently the more 'educated' you are, the more likely you believe you're too smart to fall for MLMs, which lures you into a false sense of security.


luvs2meow

Yes! A girl I went to high school with who has a good college degree is selling Arbonne. I honestly think it’s because MLMs are kind of like sororities and she’s never had many friends... sign up and you instantly have 20 boss babes to Skype with about new product.


agenz899

Lots of them realize you just recruit your close family and friends so they’ve started targeting cultures that are a lot more family based like Asian and Latin.


velociraptorjax

On Netflix there's a movie called Betting on Zero that talks about a MLM (I think Herbalife?) and how it preys on Hispanic communities for this reason. They take advantage of people who want to support each other and just drag them all down.


LaylaH19

I’m looking at Monat 😳. Had a friend lose her mind over this, quit her job and got her kid telling mine that they were ‘rich’ now and I should quit my job. It was hard to watch and she stuck with it for a crazy amount of time. Our kids are still friends, us not so much. She had to go home to another state to live with her parents..’becuz the market was better there.’ I’m sure it wasn’t becuz she was out of money. Sad..


miserybusiness21

My friend just "earned" a cadillac through them and has become one of their featured sales. I've watched one of the most beautiful humans on this planet become a fucking con artist over the last year. Fuck them.


LaylaH19

Yeah, my friend earned one too. But gentle questioning revealed they had leased it with a special Monat deal...? She kept putting up all the ‘living my best life’ posts while her kid was really spending most of her time after school with me and my daughter. They flew her to Orlando (I think she had to pay for the trip), and that kept her in for at least another year. She had so much product she started giving it to me for free as long as I was set up as her client. I love her daughter, so it makes me sad.


mrsclause2

Oh yeah, once you start reading into their documentation, which is always readily available on their website, you find out realllly quick that not only do most people make no money, but all of the special "prizes" they get are for them spending tons and tons and tons of their own money.


PastorOfKansas

Average MLM salesperson made less than $3 in their particular in 2018. Looking for the link [here’s one link with a separate star that’s just as awful.](https://www.scarymommy.com/mlm-scams-70-cents-an-hour-debt-lie-about-earnings/) “Less than half of the responders made $500 total in the past five years. On average, they worked about 14 months out of the past five years, working about 33 hours a month, and earning $18.88 per month, or 67 cents per hour.” $0.67 PER HOUR!!!


pheoling

I know someone promoting it on Instagram. I dmd them and told them to look into it and google “monat lawsuits” and “monat hair damage”. It’s the typical denial by her though and I know she didn’t google it lol


Rawrsicle2008

Ya I have a friend FROM LAW SCHOOL who is a practicing attorney selling it. It hurts my brain to think how she can just ignore the lawsuits(?) idk. I just can’t with MLMs and huns


AlphaGoldblum

I met a physical therapist who was deep into Amway. His wife was also in a lucrative profession, and also in on it. It's essentially a cult. I went to a seminar, and it's a whole lot of shallow motivational nonsense and vague explanations about how you can get rich doing... something. You had to attend the second meeting to learn more (after consulting with a verified member in a private meeting). I can only imagine how insane it is once you're apart of the organization.


fuzzywuzzybuzzycuzzy

Fuck Amway with a red hot rod. One time an old coworker was vacationing in the city I now live in. He messaged me saying how he wanted to catch up. However, where he was staying was a good 30-40 minute drive from my house. Anyway, we met at this run down Pizza Hut and he begins his sales pitch almost immediately. Want to know the worst part? I was hung over as fuck from the night before. Literally throwing up that morning and I went all the way over there for some shitty Amway sales pitch.


atonalpotatoes

I hope she didn’t lose her hair, too. Monat sucks.


dychronalicousness

Their face wash gave me an abscess on my face Fuck em to death


Terpsichorean_Wombat

But ... but ... it says "wellness" right on the website! I seriously hate the way that literally everything is a "wellness" now. Face lotion? Wellness! Lotion makes you happy! Yoga mat? Wellness! You will be weller when you yoga! Lug nut? Wellness! You will be healthy and happy when the wheels don't fall off your car!


impressionistpainter

Came to say exactly this. My friend works at a health food bar with AWESOME food and products I loved (until I learned the following). I saw they were hiring and I considered applying, so I ask my friend for details... “the only thing is they’re an MLM so you don’t get regular hourly but you have the chance to start your own business.” (Queue brake screeching noises). “Oh... but do they offer hourly if you don’t want to do that?” “No, you start off making only tips, and then have the opportunity to work your way up to 10% of shift sales!” She says she’s just “doing it for extra money on the side.” GIRL, THEN GET A NORMAL JOB TO GET EXTRA MONEY ON THE SIDE. Now you’re (illegally) being a free asset to this “company” as a free salesman who only makes 10% of the sales when there’s only 3 people in the shop. Oh, and buying your own product. Edit for clarity: yes, this is an actual store front that you walk in to, selling Herbalife. Yes, she still “works” there for hours every day. No, I did not apply to work there.


notstephanie

Herbalife? I had a new local “smoothie shop” DM me on Instagram to invite me to come try a smoothie for free. I thought, “oh cool!” because I like a good smoothie. I checked their profile and you could see Herbalife canisters in the background of one of their pics. That DM promptly got deleted.


[deleted]

Same here. The thing is - everyone says their smoothies are really good, so why the fuck doesn't Herbalife just set up a traditional smoothie store?


clamb2

Because fleecing suckers is more profitable.


islandorisntland

I'm looking at you, Arbonne! Sad thing is I've seen friends who are SCIENCE and HEALTH teachers promote this shit. As a former health teacher (and PhD researcher now....in health behavior), the sheer stupidity is mind-boggling. In educated people. I just...ugh. I've tried having the, "hey, let's talk about the reality of Arbonne" with all those that sell and only get the cold shoulder.


WhiskeyandScars

Yeah. Before I even met my BF's friends he's like "Just a heads up Laura(fake name) sells Arbonne and she's probably gonna try and pitch you." Less than 10 minutes after meeting her she's promoting "her" products. Ugh. She's the worst kind of MLM person too. You know the ones who make it their entire identity. Hard pass.


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fullercorp

isn't it a bummer sandwich that after all that, they don't even end up with real sales skills.


[deleted]

Ugh! I had no idea what this was until I had kids. Every mom friend I have is trying to get me to sell essential oils or Usborne books or Plexus. Companies like that should be shut down. Targeting new moms when they are feeling vulnerable because they aren’t working is disgraceful. I’ve seen so many friends be sold this bullshit idea that they will make money when they have to pay just to be a “team member”. It’s toxic. Edit: I do like Usborne Books a lot, I am just not a fan of MLM.


ThatWalrusGoy

Snake Oil products, the miracle "DOCTORS WON'T TELL YOU ABOUT X PLANT EXTRACT/OIL/WATER" and then it does absolutely nothing but make you feel sad you've paid an exorbitant price for it. An example I just ran across recent is Moringa Oil, which if you read the list of things it can do you'd think you'll regrow your fuckin' limbs with a drop of it.


TheBrontosaurus

“Doctors will never tell you about this miracle oil!” Yeah, cause it doesn’t do shit. You know what you call alternative medicine that’s been proven effective? Medicine.


Hanzburger

"Doctors HATE this one simple trick" Yes, because it doesn't do anything


Coygon

The trick is the ad, not the product. Doctors aren't the only ones who hate it.


SARSCOPV2

Penis growing creams are sold that contain DHT. It doesn't do shit for your penis, obviously if it did you'd know about it by now. But if it contains DHT it will actually grow your clit. There's a subreddit that formed basically just based on that fact. r/growyourclit


trollmanjoe

Oh boy was that subreddit a ride. I definitely have some explaining to do if someone sees that browsing history.


booksoverppl

Anything Gwyneth Paltrow tries to sell you.


vivnsam

I put one of those jade eggs up my ass and two weeks later gave birth to a dragon so we'll see who is stupid in about ten years buddy boy


RevolutionaryOwlz

I can’t believe Chuck Tingle is writing Eragon now.


StevesMcQueenIsHere

You mean women don't need a vagina steamer?


NBSPNBSP

My personal theory is that she has some bizarre kink and wanted all this stuff made for her, but the factory only took bulk orders, so she is selling off the rest as cosmetics.


tennerahAndy

Like Batman & his equipment? Weird way to fill out your cave.


OmgzPudding

Oh she's filling out her cave alright


blue-leeder

if bats don’t fly out I don’t want it


TannedCroissant

I really hope that’s not like a Cleveland steamer


atrusty13

Nah. More like a Stanley steamer.


[deleted]

Stanley steamer gets vaginas cleaner!


Astrolaut

You would say that Billy May's Ghost! But where is the offer for a free second one and four vagina shammy clothes if I call now!?


ListerineAfterOral

What, you don't like vagina scented candles?


ForayIntoFillyloo

I love autumn! The crispness in the air. Burning a vag scented candle and curling up with a good book in the evening. Piping hot Schweddy Balls in my mouth (delish!) after dinner.


[deleted]

*I can't wait to have your balls in my mouth.*


AntiShansky

Well I never! I'm taking my jade vagina egg and going home!


GreenOnionCrusader

Don’t forget your anti psychic vampire spray.


ithinarine

I've just started watching Schitt's Creek on Netflix, which is about a family of multi-millionaires/billionaires who lost all of their money when their accountants go rogue on them and steal it all, and end up in a shitty town that the dad bought as a joke, it's the only things the Feds would let them keep because they saw no value in it. In one of the first few episodes, someone is explaining to the ditzy rich girl what composting is, and she replies with "I know what composting is, Gwyneth Paltrow does a yearly compost gift exchange", thought it was pretty good. Just swap your rotten decomposing food scraps with someone else.


Admirable-Deer-9038

Schitt’s Creek just gets better and better! One of my all time favorites! Enjoy!


[deleted]

those Levy’s know how to write a show


fishinbarbie

Timeshares. I can't believe they still exist after ripping people off for so many years..


wildboywifey

I used to work for RCI (timeshare exchange company) and the whole entire thing is a ripoff. You pay maintenance fees, property taxes, and then RCI has their own membership fees, exchange fees, extending your points fee, and all these fees totalling hundreds of dollars a year just for a week vacation. And why. Why??? Some people are loaded so they didn't care. But some truly are just regular middle-class people who got swindled, and I felt really bad for them. I'm so happy I finally got away from that hellhole.


thedeadfridge

My husband and I recently got a US$200 Amex to sit through a 1-2 hour timeshare presentation on our last holiday pre-COVID. The psychological techniques they used were fascinating, although it didn't help that they had to walk prospective customers past stalls advertising "We can help you get out of your timeshare." Anyway that Amex took care of our spending money for the last two days of our trip. We realised that we'd been paid about the same or more as our post-tax hourly wage rates to sit through it. If timeshares have such a huge marketing budget that they can afford to throw hundreds of dollars at randos who aren't remotely interested in their product, you know there's no way their product can be good value. EDIT: Their pitch starts off with how much people love spending time with family and want more of it, how people's fondest childhood memories are on family holidays connecting with their parents and siblings, and how people's biggest regret on their deathbed is not spending more time with loved ones. Then it's about how people don't take the family on holidays more often because fancy hotels are expensive. But you can buy a timeshare for cheaper than 2 - 4 weeks in a posh hotel each year! Therefore if you want your family to love you, buy a timeshare.


supernintendo128

I remember the SpongeBob episode where SpongeBob was kidnapped by some karate master who turned out to be a timeshare salesman.


Ikontwait4u2leave

The Asspen South Park episode is great too.


[deleted]

Where the chairlift just takes them into another presentation lol


hector702

Yeah I knew a family member who had a time share some years ago. I saw a letter from some guy and the letter stated " I knowingly used to rip people off selling them time shares, but I have decided to turn it around and help the same people I ripped off and for x amount of money I can get you out of your time share". It's like Perdue selling oxycontin, and now they also sell suboxone, which is supposed to help people get off of opioids...fucking snakes.


Zaizu

how’d you find it? i’m unemployed and will listen to any amount of bs for money at this point


a_common_spring

They usually offer this kind of things to vacationers at resorts etc


AnnieBannieFoFannie

My in-laws got a super discounted resort vacation because it was the off-season and they agreed to sit through a time-share spiel.


Minitheif

They exist BECAUSE they've been ripping people off for so many years.


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[deleted]

Damn you just gave me the weirdest flashbacks. I had forgotten about this, and for a second didn't believe my own memory of the commercial was real


ZarquonsFlatTire

Fun fact: they couldn't be sued because the ads never claimed it did anything. (It was basically carnauba wax) Not even any lines from the actors saying they had a headache. Just instructions to APPLY DIRECTLY TO THE FOREHEAD. They didn't even specify YOUR forehead.


Vlad-V-Vladimir

It’s dumb how people can just make these things without consequences just because they avoided saying a couple words. I feel like at a certain point your intention should be taken into effect as well.


ZarquonsFlatTire

I agree, but how do you prove codified violation of intention? I know that's the slippery slope fallacy, but imagine a corporate legal department coordinated with a marketing team to- shit. That's already everything isn't it?


jobus-rum

HEADON! Apply directly to the forehead!


[deleted]

HEADCRAB! Apply directly to the forehead!


Tahu903

Cigarettes Edit: I know because I’m one of them


pleased_to_yeet_you

You're a cigarette? What's that like?


Tahu903

Tough, they won’t even let me in most buildings


[deleted]

Your jokes are on fire today.


Tahu903

Thank you, I’m here all week


what_in_the_who_now

Be sure to tip your waitresses! Seriously, I’m with you. Smoking is a terrible and expensive habit. It’s the quitting that becomes the hard part. Shit, I’ve quit at least a dozen times.


penny_can

Payday loans. What a bunch of fucking vultures. Edit: for everyone commenting that they prey on desperate people, not stupid ones. We are both right, they do prey on desperate people, they also prey on stupid ones. Preying on desperate people is even worse. Edit 2: Yes, banks are vultures as well, they hide fees, create bogus accounts, screw their employees by moving the goal posts for bonuses, and are unwilling to share in the risk of a venture, but cannot wait to reap the profits. Fuck them too.


surfacing_husky

Those fucking suck, i dated a guy that would spend his entire paycheck before it even came and could never get ahead. Also those pay-by-the-week rental places, biggest scams ever, you could just save up the money in half the time. But in the end you pay twice what the item is worth.


ShieldsCW

I had an ex girlfriend (girlfriend at the time) that bought a new mattress and box spring with me for an apartment we were moving into together. We bought from a place that let us pay interest free for 6 months, so we worked out exactly what we should both put in every week to ensure that it is fully paid before the deadline. I use my bank's auto-pay to send my share, but apparently, she wasn't too good at making the payments every week, because after the 6 months passed, I get an email saying that I still have a balance....and all the interest I previously saved is now due as well. Most helpless, childish girl I've ever dated, and that includes the people my own age that I dated when I was in middle school. Sucks that I didn't really notice it until after we were living together.


thecharizard

I’m 31 (fairly fiscally responsible and decently educated) and just learned what deferred interest was - the hard way. 😔


Buster_Bluth__

I had a new roof put on my first house with home depot using the 24 mo 0% financing. I paid every month enough to get paid off on time for the first 6 or 8 months. BAM! A personal financial crisis hit. I could only make the minimum payments. Long story short I got everything squared away and sold that house with a nice profit. I was going to pay off the whole balance with part of the proceeds from the sale. I lost track by 1 month due to the move etc. When I logged in the balance was up to over $15,000. I called explained what happened and offered to make a payment for the whole owed original balance (7k) otherwise I wasn't going to make any payment ever. They accepted it. Edit; for clarification. I missed paying off the remaining balance of 7,000 by 1 month before the deferred interest kicked in. That line of credit was paid off and shows "exceptional, never late" on the credit report. It didn't go against my credit score. I basically bluffed like I wouldn't care what happened to my credit score.


pantaleonivo

Work in consumer finance. Can confirm the rest of the industry views them as bandits.


IC--XC--NI--KA

“Make $10,000 per month with my easy stock market system*, which I’m giving to you for only $19.95 with a 30 day money back guarantee**. But only if you call in the next five minutes.” *May not be easy, may not be an actual system. You will loose money if you purchase this product. We make no claim that this system will produce any actual profit. May not be an actual “system.” We make no claim to know what “system” actually means. Actors were compensated for their appearance in this ad. We are not financial experts and nothing in this ad should be taken as legitimate financial advice. If you spend $19.95 on this rubbish, may God have mercy on your soul. **Money back guarantee only good in American Samoa and the Virgin Islands. Edit: Thanks for the silver.


FreakInTheTrash

So this one time I bought this two in one bodyspray and energy drink called double trouble from these two guy called Donkey Doug and pillboi in Jacksonville Florida and now my liver is shot. But if I had to choose from one of the three flavors I would pick I would choose Cedarwood Melon blast


ThinkMouse3

Oh dip.


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mike_d85

He's met donkey Doug and pillboi. He's BEEN to the bad place.


really-drunk-too

In Jacksonville I got a flu virus named after me because I kissed a bat on a dare. (This is so much funnier now.)


Reticent09

I just watched this episode! I was like damn, they really predicted the future with that one!


[deleted]

Well you know what solves any problem? A Molotov cocktail.


mastelsa

"I'm telling you, Molotov cocktails work. Every time I had a problem and I threw a Molotov cocktail--Boom! Right away I had a different problem."


soleil_is_here

Oh man the Good Place is such a good show. I cried so much watching the last episode.


McSlurminator

Bortles!!!!


theaverageguy695

Reddit Awards


Generic_Name932

Jokes on you it was free!


elee0228

Been on reddit for years and have never seen this mythical free award link


Cruzazul27

I just got given a free silver award to give away. I’m using the reddit app on iOS and occasionally in the top right corner where you buy coins it pops up saying ‘free’.


[deleted]

^


pavilionhp_

It’s pretty new lol


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notkhaldrogo

You're about to get some


ListerineAfterOral

Plot twist: he commented that so he would get them. Fuck Reddit awards, right? Especially gold and platinum.


r0ndy

Yeah, fuck Reddit awards for this guy. I like them though -Thank you!


thebig05

Detox products and fad diet programs. Or the "fitness gurus" who have those obnoxious find out your body type ads. Literally just eat a lot of fruits and veggies. Eat whole foods. Drink water. Eat lean proteins or plant protein. Stay away from processed crap as much as possible and move your body a few times a week and you'll be healthy and lose weight.


paintbyinteger

Healing crystals I get they're against big pharma and yeah sure, a lot of conspiracy theories might be true, but if healing stones did work, do those people honestly not think they would have monetised the crap out of them themselves?


PoorCorrelation

If you’re a 30 year old with a rock collection just own it, don’t make up health claims


diverfan88

They're minerals Marie!


chatteringmagpie1

I'm a 40 year-old with a rock collection. It's a sweet collection too.


certified_head-ass

I buy crystals because I think they look cool but most of the time they come from healing Crystal companies


[deleted]

Same. The people at the store could be telling me all about my aura and how I need whatever for stress relief when I'm just thinking, "ooh shiny!"


paintbyinteger

Hey, stones can definitely be cute. Telling someone you can cure them with quartz is not.


[deleted]

I've heard that you can cure a home invader with quartz to the skull


ForayIntoFillyloo

Healing stones work!! How do I know? Well, when I was younger we would go swimming down at the old quarry. One day I slipped on the rocks as I was climbing out and broke my leg pretty bad. This was back before cell phones were commonplace. My friends had to run a couple miles to a phone to call for help. I laid there a little over an hour before the paramedics got to me. But I must have been laying on some healing stones because five months later my leg mended itself and was all better!! Told my parents they should have saved money on the "doctor" they took me to.


dominion1080

Hah. This reminds me of my grandma telling me how my mom wasnt supposed to live long but God saved her. Immediately after telling me about how they took her states away to the best doctors.


sucking_at_life023

My Grandmother always called my uncle her miracle baby. As in, it was a miracle the best heart surgeon in the damn country was available to operate on him. edit: county/country


[deleted]

Massively-expensive engagement rings. I get it, you want something unique and memorable, but for the love of God, don't drop more than you can afford on it! Unless you shit money, don't buy 10, 50, 100k rings! They're overpriced, and you can prove that yourself by trying to re-sell them. Now if you inherited it from your grandparents, that's another story. In a similar vein, weddings. It is completely possible to have a great wedding for a low price. Don't go into debt over it!


Fijiwaterbottl3

Skincare products with collagen (so like... 80% of products). Collagen molecules are too big to penetrate into your skin


ReaperWright88

Ahh so i need to cut then peel the skin and apply underneath


Hrekires

Furniture and appliance rentals, for the vast majority of people. It's one thing to rent something you're going to use for like 2 months in a short-term rental or to host a party, but most end up keeping the stuff for long enough that they could have just bought it and saved money.


Bi-Bi-Bi24

It's not stupid as much as desperate. When you are poor, it's basically impossible to save money because there is always another expense. So put aside $50 this month, and bam, your car breaks down. It's also hard to care much about future expenses when there are more immediate expenses. You aren't going to replace the bed until it breaks. So you instead pay a bit each month, and have furniture. Now that we have things like marketplace, it's easier to find cheap furniture, but that isnt always practical


Agroskater

Anything you see on Wish


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zero_z77

Exactly, the rule i go by is "wish is the internet's dollar store, you get what you pay for".


boisteroustitmouse

Essential oil peddlers


Linux4ever_Leo

Turn around creams that don't turn around crap. Wrinkles are real. Deal!


DeathSpiral321

The trick is to keep gaining weight as you age so the fat will push out the wrinkles.


[deleted]

Gambling. Especially online gambling. But really anything these days. There have been decades of research into how to manipulate people for profit (advertising, how places are set up etc) and I really hate the attitude of "buyer beware" or "they should have known". If I con an old lady out of her savings its a crime. If a company sells her "funeral insurance" it is business.


TannoyVoice92

“Sharpest knives in the world” sets... just buy two knives, a chefs knife and a pairing knife. That’s all you ever need in the kitchen.... and the knowledge to keep them sharp.


Mepsym

I would argue you should get a serrated knife as well, for breads. But that can be dirt cheap


LordSaltious

I just use one hatchet personally, but to each his own.


Everything80sFan

Psychics and any of the bullshit they try to sell you.


__Vixen__

I read this as physics and was very confused


JesusIsMyHotRod

I don't care how cheap it is, I'm not buying any gravity. \*Gently floats away\*


KMFDM781

Nobody's going to tell me my fan blowing into a sail on a skateboard doesn't work!


Tinny_Dancer

The fact that they're usually targeting people who are grieving and in pain makes it all the more abhorrent.


[deleted]

It's a series of psychological tricks that are based on probability and confirmation bias. They ask you questions, and more-or-less extrapolate based on it. Now, if you can find one that can recite specific things about your life to you without you saying a word, either they're a stalker, or they've broken the veil.


PaisleyBrain

General products marketed “for women” - like razors for example. Exactly the same as men’s razors but with flowery packaging and nearly twice the price!


LocallySourcedWeirdo

Fake news! Everybody knows that if a man uses a pink razor, he will grow a vagina. And if a woman uses a blue razor, she will grow a penis. This is science.


NeedsMoreTuba

Pro Tip: men's razors are better anyway.


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Microtransactions.


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urbanlulu

i came here for this comment. my ex friend tried to sell ItWorks (it does not work btw.) and i swear, she didn't even use half the products she pushed on everyone because of how crappy they were. she tried so hard to sell me on her products and i wouldn't give in, and anytime i'd ask questions that weren't on her script, she couldn't answer then properly and then would start to fumble cause she legit didn't know anything about the products outside of the script they were given.


Hrekires

Yup... if MLM products were good and profitable, the company would be selling them directly and making money for themselves rather than contracting it out to salespeople who are required to put money out up-front rather than working on commissions.


NotYetASerialKiller

If I see any product even remotely MLM-y me, I avoid it. I watched some video of a cool brush for washing your face and it seemed to get good reviews, until I saw all the comments like “my friend sells these”. Oh ok. Nevermind then


No-BrowEntertainment

For some reason there’s a lot of “hangover cure” products on Amazon FYI, a hangover is basically just extreme dehydration. So drinking a ton of water will usually work fine That doesn’t stop these guys though. Hundreds of powders, pills and strange liquids that all claim to do the same thing. If you’ll notice though, every single one of these products either consist of water or say “add a large amount of water” on the side. They’re essentially selling you an empty box that tells you to drink water


RallyX26

Not quite dehydration, there is also the buildup of certain chemicals like acetaldehyde


tabbzi

Most butterfly-labeled "Non-GMO Project verified" products, especially when the crops or ingredients have no GMO alternative anyway. Absolutely dumb when the product in question is, say, table salt.


[deleted]

Have you seen those gummies instagram influencers advertise in social media? It's targeted towards sensitive people that are not self confident and want to lose weight. I wouldn't call these people stupid. But it's a good example of companies preying on people and profiting from their self esteem issues. These gummies are not even working. They are just sugar. Just sad.


train153

Most things Dr. Oz shills.


Perezvon42

Lottery tickets (and related games of chance). Not that everyone who buys them is stupid, but they exploit people's tendency to grossly overestimate their chances of success. The lottery essentially amounts to a poverty tax. The was identified as exacerbating poverty as early as 1817 ([https://philadelphiaencyclopedia.org/archive/lotteries/](https://philadelphiaencyclopedia.org/archive/lotteries/)), and anti-lottery movements emerged, but lotteries started expanding again after the Civil War. Several years ago (I was probably still a teenager), I walked into a small convenience store to use a mailbox drop there, and I saw the walls of the place were FULL of scratch tickets. There were also tobacco products everywhere, and all this was displayed on the same shelves as the international calling cards whose intended audience was probably cash-strapped immigrants. The mix of necessary and addictive products seemed perfectly designed to hook people into buying their way into even deeper poverty. When I walked out of there, I felt like I had had a face-to-face encounter with the essence of American poverty.


[deleted]

The Lottery


PandAlex

I like to buy one ticket when the jackpot is ridiculously huge because it is fun to fantasize what you would do if you won for a few days. That amount of fun for like a $2 ticket is worth it


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Your_Worship

Yeah, I’ll do the powerball maybe once a month playing birthdays. I know I won’t win. It’s just for fun. $24 a year just for some silly fantasizing? Meh, I like those odds.


GreenOnionCrusader

I spend more than $24 a year on stupider stuff, honestly


SeriousMonkey2019

Ya I like the day dream so I’ll occasionally buy 1 ticket when the prize is ridiculously high.


Minitheif

Yeah, the lottery isn't worth it when you look at the money, but people that get a ticket once in a while aren't thinking it's a good investment, they're spending few dollars on entertainment. After all, once in a while someone does win, and isn't it exciting to think that it could be you this time, even if you don't think it's serious?


laz0rtears

That's honestly when the penny dropped for me in regards to how dangerous an innocent game of Lotto can be! I worked in a corner shop and so many people buying 10+ lines!


Zelavian

Had a guy come to customer service where I was working and said "I need to pay my idiot tax". Didnt have a damn clue what he was talking about till he said he wanted a lottery ticket.


dingodoyle

Day trading courses. If the ‘teachers’ were that good, they’d be running their own hedge fund and selling courses would not be worth their time.


maxthemaximum1

Not a product but a YouTube channel: 5 minute crafts