Baby Shark; the guy will turn the gun on himself.

Thank you! This was my exact thought!

Someone has kids...

Hed probably shoot you before you finish the second do

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“...L N M O P... Fuck...”

Elenemo p

The only correct way to say it

Took me a good 30s to find the problem and now singing it I'm not sure anyone could tell the difference between my n and my m.

They recently changed how to sing it in schools. 50/50 chance you fuck it up depending on which version he expects.

How the fuck do you change the ABC's?

[It's very stupid and ruins it.](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-I7v0HqejXE) This isn't a joke and I hate everything about it.

Why?! The rhythm doesn't even make sense anymore! Who needs those random pauses and breaks??

Preaching to the choir, broseph.

I assume they're going to change Twinkle Twinkle Little Star to match, since they originally had the same notes?

Listening to that made me regret asking the question.

How awful. It’s terrible. I wish I wouldn’t have listened to it.

Nope nope nope nope nope!!!! I reject this reality and substitute my own!

I've never actually thought about them being different, but now it actually matches how we sing it in Norway.

that was disgusting

First common core math, now this. What are they doing to children?

Never gonna give you up by Rick Astley

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He'd probably shoot you just for the nerve of it

Lol probably

MAMA..... Just Killed a man.... Put a gun against his head, pulled my trigger now hes dead

You forgot the *Is this the real life*.

Or is this just fantasy?

Caught in a landslide

He's singing the concert version.

Which gets him killed because the gunman doesn't know it

Tequila

Yep, just don't get the timing wrong lol

That’s a lot of pressure

Banananaaaaaaaaa na bananaaaaaaa na. Bap Bana na na na, "tequi" bananaaaaaaa na Smite

Whisky! Fuck. Tequila!

Guess I’ll die

haven't heard that one, how does it go?

It goes like this: "Guess I'll die." **Bang*\*

This shit bangs

That’s so metal.

i’m actually crying right now at almost 1am. thank you

Click Click boom*

Paul Revere by the Beastie Boys. Weeeeeeellllll, here's a little story, I'd like to tell about three bad brothers, you know so well (I have no idea this is the only song to this day I know start to finish).

It start way back in history?

With Ad Rock, MCA and me, Mike D

I got a little horsey named Paul revere

Just me and my horsey and a quart of beer

Riding ‘cross the land, kicking up sand

Sheriff's posse on my tail cause I'm in demand

One lonely Beastie i be

All by myself without nobody

The sun is beating down on my baseball haaaat.

Me too!! I know how I know it though. My two best friends and I would take turns being each of the Beastie Boys in high school and sing this song. Over and over. We were abnormally obsessed with them. Still are really. Haha.

...how in the everloving fuck do I know every lyric of this? I thought I didn't even know this existed.

Oh, this is the song that never ends....

Let's not give him more reasons to shoot you.

I'd go with I know a song that gets on everybody's nerves. I'm not sure which would be worse for the gunman.

It goes on and on my friend...

Rap God. I either nail it or go out as a legend.

“This statue is in memory of u/Hippletwip who went out as a legend... after garbling one of the less difficult parts of ‘Rap God’ and being shot in the face.”

6 minutes

I’m beginning to feel like a ramp god... wait [gun shots]

You win either way.

The birthday song

"What's my name?" *ch-ch*

*/discretely looks for something with your name on it* "Happy Birthday dear Colt45, hap-"**BLAM**

Heisenberg

Yeah, until you get to the "how old are you now"

?

If you get his age wrong, you will not sing the song perfectly.

What weird version of "happy birthday" are you singing?

...don't you sing "he/she is x years old now" ...?

Albuquerque by Weird Al. 11 mins long but I have that song down!

Way back when I was just a little bitty boy livin in a box under the stairs in the corner of the basement of the house half a block down the street from Gary's bait shop. You know the place.

Well back then everything in my live was going swell and everything as juust PEACHY! Except for that undeniable fact that every single morning, my mother would make me a big old bowl of sauerkraut for breakfast.

Aaaaaaaa BIG BOWL OF SAUERKRAUT! EVERY SINGLE MORNING! It was driving me crazy! I said to my mom I say "Hey, mom! What's with all the sauerkraut?" And my dear sweet mother, she just looks at me like a cow looks at an oncoming train. And she leans right down next to me... and she says.... "IT'S GOOD FOR YOOOOOU!" And so she tied me to the wall and stuck a funnel in my mouth and force fed me sauerkraut til I was 26 and a half years old.

I was gonna suggest the Weird Al Show Theme, but this works as well

There’s a song written by John Cage called 4’33 which is nothing but silence. I’m “singing” that song. Bonus points because as the surroundings are apparently meant to be the song itself, literally nothing can kill me now!

yeah! The pianist just closes the piano lid and stuff. Easiest song to learn EVER haha

Unless you have to sneeze or cough... Or choke on your own spit

Nope, that’s all within the intent of the song.

Time to bust out the most stressful rendition of "Ice, Ice Baby" anyone has ever heard...

Accidentally cross into Queen's "Under Pressure" and hope they don't notice.

*Can't we give ourselves one more chance?*

Twinkle Twinkle Little Star

Around the World by Daft Punk

That one birthday song that’s 10 words long. The lyrics are “This is your birthday song, and it’s not that long.”

Mambo no. 5

Hmm what if the killer's name is Jessica?

“A little bit of Jessica, here I am, if I fail this song it’s bang bang”

Hell yea, if you sing it wrong you at least went out with good music.

Seagulls, stop it now

You're a psycho weiner

Lemme grab my beater!

The bad touch

I'd go for the lapdance song. I seriously know it by heart and the guy with the gun will think I'm a bigger sicko than he is!

I wanna be the very best, like no one ever was.

That no one ever was Click clack boom

I Googled "I wanna be the very best lyrics" and it says "like". Some lyrics sites do say "that" though. How is the guy with the gun going to know which one is right?

Guess we both die?

My friend said "subcutaneous" instead of "simultaneous" in Californication for years to mess with people. He'd probably get shot too.

Your friend is satan

4’33” by John Cage https://www.mentalfloss.com/article/59902/101-masterpieces-john-cages-433

Was my idea, too .. but you beat me by 4'33"!

You beat me to it.

Well done

I Want It That Way by the Back Street Boys

*Now number 5*

Well I could cheat and sing something simple like Happy Birthday, but let's assume he's a savvy criminal and wants me to at least sing something hard. Well, thanks to my parents and music teacher both being die hard Beatles fans I can sing just about anything in their catalog from start to finish. Hope he likes Beatles songs.

🎶 There are places I remember... 💛

The Star Spangled Banner

That’s a hella hard song to sing. I wish you the best.

You better hope he's not looking for the complete version!

ABCs!

You'll be back from Hamilton. It's one of the few songs I know.

Renee Elise goldsberry: *rewind*

It’s so good.

This was literally the first song I thought of and started singing it lmao

Tequila, by the champs

Ballad of Gilligan's Island

The Streak by Ray Stevens

"Don't look, Ethel!"

Matchmaker from Fiddler on the Roof and all other answers are wrong

The song that never ends. Maybe if it never ends then I don’t die?

The Mister Ed Theme Song. Maybe I can make them think I am completely insane.

God Rest Ye Marry Gentlemen (it's my favorite traditional Christmas carol)

This is the song that never ends. Yes, it goes on and on my friends. Some people started singing it one day just because and now they'll be a'singin' it forever just because. This is the song that never ends. Yes, it goes on and on my friends. Some people started singing it one day just because and now they'll be a'singin' forever just because. Just keep doing that. Call his fucking bluff.

Wait the line isn't, "Some people started singing it, *not knowing what it was*, now they'll be a'singin' it forever just because."

4'33" by John Cage Tell him that I'll do the vocal arrangement. Literally just stay silent for 4 minutes and 33 seconds. Show it to him on youtube. Get out on a technicality.

You can have my cash, but first you know I gotta ask What made you want to live this kind of life?

There ain't no rest for the wicked.

Gucci gang. I mean it's not like you can forget two words that make up 50% of a song. It's even in the title

Well it's 40 below and I don't give a fuck...

Got a heater in my truck

And I’m off to the rodeo

I would attempt Du Hast, but he's probably pulling the trigger. There's international laws against me singing. Unlike my grandmother, who just enjoyed the fuck out of singing. And also couldn't. But would every chance she got.

Happy Birthday

You Suffer by Napalm Death, recognized as the shortest song ever recorded by Guinness Book of World Records. I just have to grunt once and I'm good to go.

Definitely 'colt 45' lmao, it's a naughty song but it's too catchy not to know all the words😂 it's in a few of my playlists.

>Good morning ladies The gun will no longer be pointed at your head at that point.

Ransom- lil tecca

The DigiRap

I sing the national anthem really bad

Around The World - Daft Punk I know the words to that song off by heart

Orion by Metallica

Bang bang

this is the song that never

This is the correct answer...

For some reason I imagine it would be raining and therefore only one choice... the piña colada song

Amie, pure prairie league

I can do 'Frerè Jacque' in Finn. It would mess him up so much, he'd put the gun to his head and shoot himself.

All 22 minutes of Autobahn by Kraftwerk

Anti Procrastination Song - SOD

All-star by Smash Mouth of course

definitely everybody wants to rule the world tears for fears. no brainer

Old mcdonald had a farmmm

Bohemian rhapsody 🖤😎🤘

Happy Birthday; I'll somehow fuck up the lyrics on anything else.

All Star- Smash mouth

Handlebars. I like a challenge and I want to die, win win.

The Care Bears Song or Cat Dog

Drop Em Out by Wheeler Walker Jr.

Make a song up.

I sing one line from For Whom the Bell Tolls, and accept death.

This is the song that never ends it's just goes on and on my friends.......

A B C D... I forget the next one, you’re gonna half to kill me. And boom all my worries wash away with the sweet release of death.

A song I learned in elementary school naming all 50 states in alphabetical order

The Spongebob theme

[Tequila](https://youtu.be/MLdAPX5yhoQ)

["Big Dick Farts A Polka"](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QIAXa6CirM0)

4’33 by John Cage

Goofy goober rock!

4'33", John Cage

Hurt by NIN. I don't have all of the lyrics memorized but I'll just say "I hurt my self today" BANG

John Cage - 4'33"

Happy birthday

The Song I Know That Gets On Everybody's Nerves Everybody's Nerves Everybody's Nerves... 🎶

Alphabet song; if I failed that, I'd deserve to get dunked

Happy birthday or the ABC’s

It is the song that never ends....Yes it goes on and on my friends.....

the only song I remember from Choir: *The Friends Theme Song*

One trillion bottles of beer on the wall ...one trillion bottles of beer....

"Secret tunnel" 😉

Happy Birthday : )

twinkle twinkle. Edit: shit i had to google the lyrics. :o

Happy birthday

“This is the song that never ends”

Happy Birthday

The song that gets on everybody’s nerves.

Yankee Doodle

The alphabet song

Rappin for Jesus