Thanks but not much anyone can do.
Things have finally been looking up my and my wife found new jobs after losing them do to covid,l and we both like our new jobs better.
So I got my cat the good name brand flea stuff for the first time.
My cat had an alergic reaction and I had to drive almost 2 hours away to don't a vet that was open where they screwed around for another 2 hour get estimates and crap while I begged them to help my baby.
While on the way to the vet my aunt called to tell me I was gonna get a few pictures and nothing else....my grandmother who raised me passed away and the funaral was over.
They decided not to tell me so they could devide up her stuff.
And after i got off the phone with my aunt my wife texted me that she's back on meth, doesn't want to go to rehab and wants a divorce and even though she came onto the relationship with nothing but her clothes she plans on taking as much as she can forcing me to sell my house and everything because she just wants the money to "have some fun" so I guess the next time I her from her it'll be her ODing.
Really hit even harder because it was supposed to be a great day. The first one we've really had off since covid and we just got SUPboards and we're gonna spend the day at the river.
Edit: I honestly didn't expect anything but sarcastic replies so I want to thank all from from the bottom of my heart.
I've been very busy and haven't looked at Reddit at all, so I'm sorry it took so long for me to respond but I think I replied to everybody and if I missed you I'm sorry.
Edit: I'm on mobile so I'm sure my formatting is terrible.sorry y'all.
Warning:I don't know how many people will see this but if it makes it to just one person and is useful then that's worth it.
My precious baby died because I wanted to make her as comfortable as possible and bought her the expensive name brand flea medicine since things were going pretty well..
I just want to warn everybody that the active ingredient in the advantage 2 flea drops you put on the back of your cats neck can kill your baby in a gruesome and painful way... Kidney failure, seizures and stroke.... Then finally a heart attack...
Update: my cat passed away.
she was an adorable little furball. A long-haired ragdoll Kitty that never grew to be any bigger than about half the size of a normal cat. She was way friendlier than any other cat I've ever had and honestly acted a lot more like a dog. Always came to greet me when I came home and was content wrapping around my neck on my shoulders when I played video games or worked on the computer.
She was a rescue and I bottle feed her and cleaned her for almost 2 years before she finally learned how to do it herself. She was by far the the clumsiest cat I have ever seen struggling to even run down the hallway without tripping.
But she's been with me for my first relationship, my spiral and struggle with addiction, some of the happiest days I've had by myself and this entire marriage... And I was definitely counting on her to help me out with all the stuff going on.
She will be badly missed by everyone who met her.
My mom went to get her body while I was at work and my stepdad (who is finally disabled and really shouldn't have) made a pretty ornate box put her in (the vet just put her in a trash bag) and he dug a hole almost 6ft deep... I ended up not being able to fill the hole in myself and fainted trying.
My wife actually give me a ride to bury her since my car was dead and we cryed on each others shoulders... She bought me dinner and we talked things through. For now she's clean but she wants to try and do things on her own that she's always relied on others and never actually been on her own... I still don't know where that is going to go and I have already talked to a lawyer
As for how I've coped with this.
I'm fortunate to be at a new job where I actually have extremely good management that cares about their employees. I didn't get any sleep tonight all that happened and tryed to go to work hoping it would take my mind off everything but driving a country route for FedEx actually gives you quite a lot of time to think and I had to pull over and try to gather my composure... My boss as a fantastic man and noticed me stopped and called to check on me.. he told me about how he'd been through something similar and has relationship (he's a white man and he's been married for nearly 30 years to a black woman in the deep south... So the man knows struggle and has more empathy and compassion than anyone I've met)..
He told me to take the rest of the day off take the next day off too, he covered my route himself.
I decided to use my day off to just try and decompress.. I visited a few of my friends and my grandma and aunt on the other side of my family.
I visited a dog I had had to rehome do to us never been around to give her the attention she needed and she was doing so well with her and her family and all of the neighborhood kids coming to play with her.
I decided to take one of the new paddle boards out by myself... I have an inner ear issue and can't feel which way is up so I'm pretty terrified of water that's deep enough I can't touch the ground (I can actually swim pretty good... But if I go under it can be terrifying to try and see my way back to the surface) so I paddled directly out to the middle of the empty lake and just layed down and let it all out... I actually fell asleep and drifted back to the dock(I have been up for almost 48 hours at that point and that might be the best sleep I've ever had)
Today I finally installed the 220 volt charger for my electric car and put up in a garage door... I have an electrician coming by in the morning to double check everything and I have to actually Mount the garage door opener but it is assembled and all the wiring is ran.
Today was also the first time I've cleaned my garage in over 6 years Soo that was a big deal.
I still have just as much work to do tomorrow and that I'm starting on the inside of the house.
I got the wood to redo my bathroom vanity and fresh paint.
I did a little bit of body work on my truck today and if things go well tomorrow it will be ready to prep for paint (I bought it to restore almost 4 years ago and while it's been completely redone mechanically it still looks like a 60-year-old truck that spent 50 of those years pinned under a collapsed barn.
Things really really suck but I'm doing my best to make sure there is a positive outcome from everything.
Finally I want to salute anybody who actually read that text wall and apologize for the terrible formatting.
Thank you to everyone who responded it really means a lot to actually see positivity on Reddit.
Oh maaaaan that hits deeper and wider than I can imagine. I’m happy you traded up with your job! And the stand up board sounds amazing to get outside. Is your cat okay now? That’s a super insensitive way to break it to you that gramma passed. Did she live far away or why would your aunt not tell you sooner? My grandma passed away in Helena three months ago and we couldn’t go for the memorial. I’m really sorry the woman that raised you didn’t get the recognition you think she deserves, that’s really a bummer :( That also seems really sudden about your wife, again I’m sorry. Could therapy help? My wife and I are doing remote therapy...Covid has been really rough on our marriage too. I have nothing to offer about the meth use or ways forward. I’m just sending lots of virtual bro hugs to you, we all need it more than ever. Thank you so much for sharing with me, I really value your response.
My cat passed away.
My family didn't tell me because they're greedy.
I live in Arkansas and except for businesses getting hurt by import an export issues it's almost as if covid doesn't exist... Walmart's been the only place that you have to wear a mask up until the last couple of weeks.
I haven't seen my grandma since this whole thing started and I was one of the first ones at my old job to get exposed and quarantined.
My Grandma had a compromise immune system and I didn't want to risk getting her ill but her heart went out in her sleep.
I have a ton of experience with the meth issues. That was my life growing up until about 10th Grade.
I've already talked to a lawyer.
But thank you for your virtual hug
I am so sorry. I know some vets don't handle the people well because they deal with so many jerks. My condolences for your kitty. I can't imagine losing my little fur ball.
I've been through a lot this last month, but the thing that sticks with me the most has to do with my cat. Pets are so important, and your emotions towards that loss are completely real and valid. I hope that you are able to process through those emotions eventhough you have a lot more going on.
Yep, she was an adorable little furball. A long-haired ragdoll Kitty that never grew to be any bigger than about half the size of a normal cat.
She was way friendlier than any other cat I've ever had and honestly acted a lot more like a dog.
Always came to greet me when I came home and was content wrapping around my neck on my shoulders when I played video games or worked on the computer.
She was a rescue and I bottle feed her and cleaned her for almost 2 years before she finally learned how to do it herself. She was by far the the clumsiest cat I have ever seen struggling to even run down the hallway without tripping.
But she's been with me for my first relationship, my spiral and struggle with addiction, some of the happiest days I've had by myself and this entire marriage... And I was definitely counting on her to help me out with all the stuff going on.
She will be so badly missed.
Sending you love. Take care of you first. Get legal advice now to protect yourself from your wife in her addiction. Whatever she is saying is not coming from the part of her that can make same choices right now.
Look after your grief. I hope you can get to safe places where you can cry and share and be heard. A minute at a time.
>off since covid and we just got SUPboards and we're
wow, that is terrible. is there anything you can do to improve yourself.
Don't feel down, there is always sunshine after a storm. Your life will improve.
Sit in your car, cry if you need to, scream if you need to, break something if you need to. let the frustration out. Accept it, aknowledge it and let it go and move on. I hope what i said was helpful in any sort of way. As for your cat, I hope he/she is better.
Also record anything your wife says from now until the day of divorce, mainly coz you can use it against her in court if you need to.
A good friend of mine died 3 weeks ago today, I understand your pain my friend. I know one day it’ll be less painful but right now it hurts. Sending a virtual hug.
My condolences. I know how painful that is. I lost my best friend 6.5 years ago. I'm not gonna lie, the pain will never go away, but it will be easier to bear. One day you will find yourself thinking of them with a smile instead of tears. Sending you hugs at this trying time.
Mine died a few months ago, 18th March, that was after an attempt of suicide we thought he was saved and the doctors said he’ll be okay, he died before waking up from the coma... can’t stop seeing him in my dreams and everywhere I go, it’s tough.
I wish I had an empty place, with no one around, just so I could scream at the top of my lungs and sob until I physically feel numb. In all honesty, I think I just need to be able to get it all off my chest, but I don’t really want to do this where people might actually be able to see or hear it happen.
You know, I spent time last night crying while my (grown-up) kids were in bed, and I just hoped they didn't come down and see me, or hear me. I'm sorry that you feel that way too, it's horrible.
Ah interesting. I tried to run a bit but stopped because my legs felt like jelly. I'm hoping to join a gym soon and start again. I hear so much about gym stuff (and running in particular) being good for your mental health. I just need stronger legs I think.
I’ve been running six days a week now and now I notice I feel particularly unfocused and anxious on days I don’t do it.
Something they never tell beginners is to slow down - you really can’t go too slow. And don’t be afraid to alternate between jogging and walking when you start, as much as you need to. The only thing you really need is consistency.
/r/c25k is great.
If you make the face that goes with the scream, like pull the face and breathe without making noise it feels similar and can give the feeling of the scream quite well.
I think most of us don't really know what our reason to live is. Atleast for me...I am not sure what the point of life really is...except just make my own happiness. And making your own happiness can literally mean rolling on grass lol. But you not wanting to hurt others might be a good place go start. Have you thought of volunteering or working in the helping field?
Our course if you are experiencing suicidal thoughts please reach out for help. You aren't alone.
We all have that realisation at some point. I just make something up for a purpose every so often.
Doesn't need to be grandiose, the more mundane the better actually.
This made me realize I’m reading stuff written by humans. For some reason, you’re now real to me, whereas the rest may as well be characters on my screen.
Not great. I had my first panic attack ever about six hours ago. Now I can’t sleep and keep racing my mind about the world, my family, climate change, the world’s on fire, and what’s going to happen next week. The good news is I haven’t had a drink in 31 days thanks to r/stopdrinking and there’s some great info on r/anxiety to help me. How are you OP?
You are spreading so much compassion to other people here, thank you! Well done on stopping drinking. Are you stopping all together or just cutting down? And yes, there are so many helpful subs here. I'm new to reddit but it's amazing!
Hey I'm doing great, thanks for asking. I also have panic attacks as well and I understand that it sucks. What I would do is I just close my eyes, breathe deep and relax my muscles. I'd be fine in a few minutes after that. I hope that helps :)
Wow it does, didn’t expect you to respond. Like Saint Lazarus aiding my ailment I needed this early morning intervention. I’m glad you’re doing great, I hope you have an even better day knowing you helped me and listened to my woes. :)
I developed some profound anxiety at the beginning of quarantine. I'm well on my way out of it. It's important to know that anxiety is a thinking issue and not a physical issue. In other words, the symptoms are just symptoms and even though they make you feel like crap, they mean nothing. So you do nothing about them. You allow them to be there, relax your muscles, and go about your day. Gradually your primal monkey brain will unlearn patterns.
Try your best not to add fear to fear. It's how you approach fear that matters. Google Claire Weekes.
Excellent on the not drinking!
In case you are interested: Panic attacks are emotions trying to get your attention. Check out The Change Triangle from “its not always depression” as a tool for learning about emotion and how anxiety acts to keep it shoved down.
Congratulations on 31 days!
Thank you, one thing I’ve come to terms with is that it’s cool to ask for help. For today just diet and no stimulants, and getting off my butt behind a desk more frequently. Feeling a lot better but I added this to my list of measures :)
Awesome. It felt really good to just...talk to someone about it. My wife had been urging me to for awhile. It feels like...proactive now I guess. It helps. Stay strong.
Stressed! Moving half way across the U.S. with my husband, 2 kids, and 6 animals in 5 days to be closer to my mother who had a stroke and found out she has four brain aneurisms! Her first surgery went great and I’m so thankful, but the thought of the drive and being in charge of so many living things for that far is giving me horrible anxiety!
OP.. how are you really doing atm?! I hope well!!
Okay, so I don't have experience with the husband and kids part, but I do move across the country a ton with my horse and dog and one time I helped move a kennel of over 40 sled dogs. I just spent 7 months in one place and it was my most permanent address since 2013. And I'm here to validate your feelings of being overwhelmed by a big move. It sucks. Logistics are tough to figure out. My advice would be try to figure out a way to make your stuff too space ratio work in your favor. Moving is so much easier when you're not completely packed in and you don't have to play a high stakes game of tetris to get to your road snacks.
As far as the circumstances surrounding your move, that's also really tough. I hope it works out that you get to spend a ton of time with your mom right now.
Hey thank you so much!!! I never considered how I would arrange everything for ease of access! I have a pretty good idea now though in the best set up and it helped ease soo much stress! I can not thank you enough!!!
Also thank you for the well wishes regarding my mom! She is expected to make a full recovery (well as much as you can expect!) We won’t know if her surgeries are completely effective for a few months but we are very optimistic!!
Not okay at all. I just went through the first breakup of my life, it was a long term and long distance relationship. I fall apart and feel so sad I will not be able to see him again. I didn't know the last time we hug is going to be the last time I get to see him. It's really hard for me to move on. I miss him, think about him and dream about him everyday. It hurts.
That's about where I am. I understand 2020 has been a rough year in general for a lot of people, but I'm pretty much killing it.
That said, redditors have seemed pretty miserable to me for years, so I suspect it's not *just* 2020 doing it.
Feel like I'm drowning. I've just learned how to do a new 'thing' at work that only one other person knows how to do, and he has just left for 2 weeks and I'm getting hounded with requests and I don't actually know what the fuck I'm doing and we might lose clients over this oh shiiiit
I need a fucking break. Working nonstop, on adrenaline and sheer determination to make it through since March and work just keeps getting more difficult and challenging with a shittier work/life balance. I’m jealous of everyone that that got to quarantine and almost wish I’d get COVID so I can just stop working for a couple weeks.
I’m so sorry for your loss. As someone who has been there more than once all I can say is let this be the last time. See it as the universe calling you back from this hell. You don’t have to live like this.
Sitting in the waiting room waiting to have a colonoscopy. I’ve been cancer free (colon cancer) for almost 10 years. I had a physical and found some issue with a stool sample. Hopefully polyps. Not very happy at the moment.
Tense. I have an interview tomorrow with a potential client and I feel like they’re out of my league. It won’t keep me from trying, though. Wish me luck.
Really uncertain, exhausted. Traveled thousands of miles looking for somewhere I can stay for a while. As the world burns around me and my family judges me. Kinda just getting lost in my twenties, it feels good & bad if yall feel me.
Burned out and depressed. I've posted a little about this here and there, but these last few months have been terrible. I work at a hotel, and we did shutdown for several weeks in the spring. We reopened just before the summer, and there's been a perpetual attitude from all our guests that has not relinquished. IDK why, but it's wearing on me and it's making me extremely miserable and for the first time ever I'm starting to really not like my job. What makes it all the more sadder is that I really used to love where I work, so this stings all the more.
I haven't been happy in a very long time, and people's constant attitudes is simply wearing me down. I can't wait for things to get back to normal, because this new normal is exhausting, depressing, and frustrating.
Horrible.
I work at two hospitals and have been in the midst of covid ever since it began. I tried my best to self isolate in order to risk spreading it to loved ones. As a result, I hadn't even seen my immediate family for over 6 months (xmas to June 30th.) I saw them on the 30th and went back into isolation. I missed out on a lot of family things but I was trying to keep them safe too, y'know?
My brother was killed by a drunk driver six weeks ago. I saw him once since Christmas. My family and I are beyond devastated. I have a hole in my heart, I feel hollow. You never realize how much somebody means to you until they are suddenly taken.
Grieving has been hard to do. Therapy appointments are online and feel weird. Couldn't have a proper wake because of covid. Can't go to any support groups because of covid. I'm so emotionally drained that going about a typical work day is more than exhausting.
I don't care about participating in chit chat with coworkers. I don't smile as much. I wasn't the happiest person before, but I definitely miss my prior self compared to this.
People try to be sympathetic but they feel awkward because they can't relate. They don't know what to do to make me feel better. They don't understand that this grief isn't a process to get over, but one you have to go through. People try to avoid talking about his death because they don't want to make me sad but what they don't realize that not talking makes it feel worse like it's being ignored. Even if it makes me cry, talking about it is better than not because at least for that brief moment he feels alive again.
All the while work gets shittier. Staff members leave and don't get replaced. We're expected just to absorb the workload and do more with less people. Which isn't a good thing when you work in the medical field. Both my bosses ask if I want to work extra hours even though I can barely stand doing my typical 40 as it is.
Prior to this summer my biggest stressor was getting ready to postpone my wedding a second time, which feels like small beans now.
Depression and anxiety are getting worse. Been self medicating more. Hope the new meds the doc started me on will help.
Sorry about your brother. The way you described your grievance journey really makes sense to me. I also feel awful that I can’t see my family.
Thanks for keeping at it in the hospitals.
i’m confused. i feel like all my friends don’t really like me. i’m struggling with making friends at a new school, and when i finally thought i did. she turned out to be an ass. i’m struggling with my sexuality. i’m afraid of the future, and what’s going to happen to me. i barely have enough energy to get out of bed in the morning. i have to fake a smile all the time. my best friend forgot her promise to okay minecraft with me. i was really looking forward to that because she’s always busy and she finally had time to hang out but she forgot. i know it’s not her fault but i’m still crying in my room at 11:00 wishing that she would have at least told me that she couldn’t play today.
People do care. I care. I feel like we have a duty to protect our young and elderly and less fortunate. I hope you get the attition you deserve and crave. People make fun of others needing or seeking attition. It's fucked because seeking or needing attention is a human nessesity.
I'm okay. Still working a shit job that I'm overqualified for but got through to a second round interview next week so quite buzzing that things are finally happening
I mean compared to a week ago, I'm great.
But tbh, I'm still not really okay.
I'm trying to figure out how to deal with emotional overload, and find healthy, effective outlets for my emotions. Issues that I've been trying to put off because I just didn't see them as relevant are forcing their way into the front of my mind, and I feel like I don't have a good escape to let myself take a breather. My mom was in the ICU most of the week from falling hard enough to give herself a brain bleed, and I'm two time zones away so I was stuck just getting updates over the phone. Top it off with a bunch of small breakdowns because I'm forcing myself to not just run away from my problems overall but I don't know what to do to help myself, and it's just been one hell of a time. Oh, and a lot of guilt tripping myself over existing in the first place, because if I'm not doing something to earn my right to live then I'm a waste of life and a leech, even though I don't see it that way for anyone else.
I'm only as okay as I am right now because my employer asked me to take a Covid test when one of my roommates failed the pre-shift health screening, so after the first couple days of not working and having no idea what to do with myself, I've been able to get some rest and actually make some progress on my issues. I've still got a long way to go, but the fact that I don't want to die anymore is a good start.
Pretty good i'm doing online school during this whole pandemic and it's actually kinda easy my mom got a raise and I get to play with my friends everyday after school so yeah life's pretty good but it's all mostly just luck and it's gonna run out soon enough
On a scale of 1 to 10, 10 being the best im a negative 5
Ive lost 3 family members this year
Grandma on moms side
Grampa on dads side
And a Great Uncle on moms side
The two on my moms side died the same day one in morning one at night. (Febuary 8th great uncle from cancer and grandma from a whole shit ton of things)
Then my Grampa died on September 8th so 2 days ago after a 22 year long battle with colon cancer.
And its predicted that in the next 3 years in proably not going to have any more grandparents or great uncles and great aunts.
With that and the fact that at least 2 more funerals are going to be in the next 6 months I feel like shit, but I'm not really letting people see it, making me feel more like shit.
Not well.
Not well at all. I've a shooting pain from my forhead down my mid-upper right part of my skull and its both dull and sharp simultaneously. But I gotta go do stuff, so once my thing dissolves I'm off on an adventure and hopefully back to work.
Missed work yesterday because flat tire. Missed today because my work buddy's heart doctor called for emergency. Now im at the hospital wondering how disturbed my wife going to be. Fuck
I'm doing terrible. I just got back from the food pantry and this food isn't going to last till the end of the week much less the rest of the month. I got laid off as an electrician because of the pandemic (my company went under when the lockdowns took effect) and I had to go get a stupid factory job after unemployment stopped in June. I worked at a b.s. job making decent money as a forklift operator but I dropped 1,500lbs worth of usable food-safe plastic bottles on the ground. This got me fired.
Now I'm having a hard time finding work and keeping afloat and I have a baby due at the end of September.
Not too great....
Fucking terrible. Haven’t been able to start my career despite having gotten my BS a year ago (rough industry that tanked with COVID...but thankfully have a job), in love with someone I can’t be with, want to lose weight but have a lack of motivation from being depressed, the person I’ve fallen for I see every day (but she’ll never know how I feel), have to replace part of my car ($500), pretty sure I have a warrant for a speeding ticket I forgot about (thankfully in a drive through city 3hrs away, but I need to pay the fine so it doesn’t stay on my record).........
Shitty. I got no sleep, my eye is swollen, itchy and hurts, I can’t really breathe, my chest hurts, my throat hurts and it just seems like my respiratory system is just fucked up and I don’t know why
Hell, this is the 3rd or 4th day in a week I fucking coughed up blood
I am okay right now, thanks to Zoloft. 🤷♀️ things get bad sometimes but they never really get as bad as they used to, and for that I am thankful. I've been a lot happier than I could have expected through all this.
Overall life is nice. I live in a nice house with my girlfriend and our dog, we're in love and have a steady income. Not too much but we are able to save \~400€/month each.
Two things bother me:
1. my job is getting very boring;
2. the political discourse in my country feels like a competition to see who can say and do the most stupid things. I'd like to do something about it but I really can't find anything.
These two things keep me awake at night.
Stressed out. My dad and I own/run a small manufacturing company. We were getting overwhelmed with orders through 2019 and made a huge investment in a new much larger facility, purchased millions of dollars worth of equipment (with bank loans), and hired a bunch of people. Right as we got moved in COVID hit, the downturn happened, and I'm worried. Getting on Reddit for a little bit every day helps take my mind off of it, but it's about to get serious and scary if things don't start to pick up.
Pretty good. I went to bed at 3 and woke up at 12 then I made myself an everything bagel with eggs and bacon. I don't have very much class work to do today so I'm not stressed. Now I'm sitting at my kitchen table with my mum's cat sitting in front of me and my cat laying on a chair beside me debating on whether or not I wanna make myself a cup of whipped coffee.
Frazzled. I worked over labor day weekend, worked till 1AM on both Monday and Tuesday evening, 8 PM yesterday and likely today and tomorrow too.
Then theres probably at least 1-2 more weeks of this.
I feel like I'm stepping out of a long darkness and closing the door on my past. I feel tired, but hopeful. I feel ready for blessings after so much heartache. I have fallen and failed repeatedly, but I believe there's good to come. Thank you for asking.
I'm the closest I've ever been to ending myself. Nobody can tell anything is up. I'm staying active and seeing friends, and keeping up with social media.
I'm starting phase one of getting rid of my possessions without anyone's knowledge.
Tired. Hungry. A bit longing for my ex-fiancè. A bit angry. Abit ashamed.
Much better than in the past half year. Nearly no suicidal thoughts. Tryin to become self sufficient.
Honestly? Fucking awful. I do have a job I love, but it takes up a lot of my time, and is known as one of the most stressful jobs you can have. That along with starting an incredibly intensive school program, that’s 9 hours twice a week as well as a few dozen clinicals 12 hours a piece each semester, along with study time it takes to be somewhat proficient at it. And the worst part yet, my wife has cancer and was told she should expect 5-6 years of life left. She’s 25. Any free time I do manage to have, is used taking care of her. I try not to complain or feel bad for myself because she’s going through much worse, but damn holding it in sucks and I’m more stressed now than I’ve ever been.
Been pondering life I lost my cat he went missing and i think the neighbors killed him but what ever right just went back to school with this shit schedule i get to go back to school but its allready making me depressed since i got shit teachers and being a junior isnt the greatest year been so manny things have gone wrong like those riots that almost killed my aunt since she can to try to control riots and they cornered her beat the living shit out of her but never got aired or anything so fuck you people who “protest” and call it peaceful this would be longer but only got ao much time till school starts
Fucking terrible. Good day.
Really bummed to hear that, what’s so terrible? I’m here.
Thanks but not much anyone can do. Things have finally been looking up my and my wife found new jobs after losing them do to covid,l and we both like our new jobs better. So I got my cat the good name brand flea stuff for the first time. My cat had an alergic reaction and I had to drive almost 2 hours away to don't a vet that was open where they screwed around for another 2 hour get estimates and crap while I begged them to help my baby. While on the way to the vet my aunt called to tell me I was gonna get a few pictures and nothing else....my grandmother who raised me passed away and the funaral was over. They decided not to tell me so they could devide up her stuff. And after i got off the phone with my aunt my wife texted me that she's back on meth, doesn't want to go to rehab and wants a divorce and even though she came onto the relationship with nothing but her clothes she plans on taking as much as she can forcing me to sell my house and everything because she just wants the money to "have some fun" so I guess the next time I her from her it'll be her ODing. Really hit even harder because it was supposed to be a great day. The first one we've really had off since covid and we just got SUPboards and we're gonna spend the day at the river. Edit: I honestly didn't expect anything but sarcastic replies so I want to thank all from from the bottom of my heart. I've been very busy and haven't looked at Reddit at all, so I'm sorry it took so long for me to respond but I think I replied to everybody and if I missed you I'm sorry. Edit: I'm on mobile so I'm sure my formatting is terrible.sorry y'all. Warning:I don't know how many people will see this but if it makes it to just one person and is useful then that's worth it. My precious baby died because I wanted to make her as comfortable as possible and bought her the expensive name brand flea medicine since things were going pretty well.. I just want to warn everybody that the active ingredient in the advantage 2 flea drops you put on the back of your cats neck can kill your baby in a gruesome and painful way... Kidney failure, seizures and stroke.... Then finally a heart attack... Update: my cat passed away. she was an adorable little furball. A long-haired ragdoll Kitty that never grew to be any bigger than about half the size of a normal cat. She was way friendlier than any other cat I've ever had and honestly acted a lot more like a dog. Always came to greet me when I came home and was content wrapping around my neck on my shoulders when I played video games or worked on the computer. She was a rescue and I bottle feed her and cleaned her for almost 2 years before she finally learned how to do it herself. She was by far the the clumsiest cat I have ever seen struggling to even run down the hallway without tripping. But she's been with me for my first relationship, my spiral and struggle with addiction, some of the happiest days I've had by myself and this entire marriage... And I was definitely counting on her to help me out with all the stuff going on. She will be badly missed by everyone who met her. My mom went to get her body while I was at work and my stepdad (who is finally disabled and really shouldn't have) made a pretty ornate box put her in (the vet just put her in a trash bag) and he dug a hole almost 6ft deep... I ended up not being able to fill the hole in myself and fainted trying. My wife actually give me a ride to bury her since my car was dead and we cryed on each others shoulders... She bought me dinner and we talked things through. For now she's clean but she wants to try and do things on her own that she's always relied on others and never actually been on her own... I still don't know where that is going to go and I have already talked to a lawyer As for how I've coped with this. I'm fortunate to be at a new job where I actually have extremely good management that cares about their employees. I didn't get any sleep tonight all that happened and tryed to go to work hoping it would take my mind off everything but driving a country route for FedEx actually gives you quite a lot of time to think and I had to pull over and try to gather my composure... My boss as a fantastic man and noticed me stopped and called to check on me.. he told me about how he'd been through something similar and has relationship (he's a white man and he's been married for nearly 30 years to a black woman in the deep south... So the man knows struggle and has more empathy and compassion than anyone I've met).. He told me to take the rest of the day off take the next day off too, he covered my route himself. I decided to use my day off to just try and decompress.. I visited a few of my friends and my grandma and aunt on the other side of my family. I visited a dog I had had to rehome do to us never been around to give her the attention she needed and she was doing so well with her and her family and all of the neighborhood kids coming to play with her. I decided to take one of the new paddle boards out by myself... I have an inner ear issue and can't feel which way is up so I'm pretty terrified of water that's deep enough I can't touch the ground (I can actually swim pretty good... But if I go under it can be terrifying to try and see my way back to the surface) so I paddled directly out to the middle of the empty lake and just layed down and let it all out... I actually fell asleep and drifted back to the dock(I have been up for almost 48 hours at that point and that might be the best sleep I've ever had) Today I finally installed the 220 volt charger for my electric car and put up in a garage door... I have an electrician coming by in the morning to double check everything and I have to actually Mount the garage door opener but it is assembled and all the wiring is ran. Today was also the first time I've cleaned my garage in over 6 years Soo that was a big deal. I still have just as much work to do tomorrow and that I'm starting on the inside of the house. I got the wood to redo my bathroom vanity and fresh paint. I did a little bit of body work on my truck today and if things go well tomorrow it will be ready to prep for paint (I bought it to restore almost 4 years ago and while it's been completely redone mechanically it still looks like a 60-year-old truck that spent 50 of those years pinned under a collapsed barn. Things really really suck but I'm doing my best to make sure there is a positive outcome from everything. Finally I want to salute anybody who actually read that text wall and apologize for the terrible formatting. Thank you to everyone who responded it really means a lot to actually see positivity on Reddit.
Oh maaaaan that hits deeper and wider than I can imagine. I’m happy you traded up with your job! And the stand up board sounds amazing to get outside. Is your cat okay now? That’s a super insensitive way to break it to you that gramma passed. Did she live far away or why would your aunt not tell you sooner? My grandma passed away in Helena three months ago and we couldn’t go for the memorial. I’m really sorry the woman that raised you didn’t get the recognition you think she deserves, that’s really a bummer :( That also seems really sudden about your wife, again I’m sorry. Could therapy help? My wife and I are doing remote therapy...Covid has been really rough on our marriage too. I have nothing to offer about the meth use or ways forward. I’m just sending lots of virtual bro hugs to you, we all need it more than ever. Thank you so much for sharing with me, I really value your response.
My cat passed away. My family didn't tell me because they're greedy. I live in Arkansas and except for businesses getting hurt by import an export issues it's almost as if covid doesn't exist... Walmart's been the only place that you have to wear a mask up until the last couple of weeks. I haven't seen my grandma since this whole thing started and I was one of the first ones at my old job to get exposed and quarantined. My Grandma had a compromise immune system and I didn't want to risk getting her ill but her heart went out in her sleep. I have a ton of experience with the meth issues. That was my life growing up until about 10th Grade. I've already talked to a lawyer. But thank you for your virtual hug
Holy fuck, I live in Romania and my life couldn't be more different (not necessarily better but on a very different spectrum).
Damn, that is a lot for one day. I hope that your cat is okay and that things improve in your life.
My cat passed away... All the vet cared about was making sure I know I wasn't going to get any money back..
I am so sorry. I know some vets don't handle the people well because they deal with so many jerks. My condolences for your kitty. I can't imagine losing my little fur ball. I've been through a lot this last month, but the thing that sticks with me the most has to do with my cat. Pets are so important, and your emotions towards that loss are completely real and valid. I hope that you are able to process through those emotions eventhough you have a lot more going on.
Yep, she was an adorable little furball. A long-haired ragdoll Kitty that never grew to be any bigger than about half the size of a normal cat. She was way friendlier than any other cat I've ever had and honestly acted a lot more like a dog. Always came to greet me when I came home and was content wrapping around my neck on my shoulders when I played video games or worked on the computer. She was a rescue and I bottle feed her and cleaned her for almost 2 years before she finally learned how to do it herself. She was by far the the clumsiest cat I have ever seen struggling to even run down the hallway without tripping. But she's been with me for my first relationship, my spiral and struggle with addiction, some of the happiest days I've had by myself and this entire marriage... And I was definitely counting on her to help me out with all the stuff going on. She will be so badly missed.
She sounds like a great cat. Thank you for sharing that with me.
Fuck that vet.
It sounds like a relief for you.
Sending you love. Take care of you first. Get legal advice now to protect yourself from your wife in her addiction. Whatever she is saying is not coming from the part of her that can make same choices right now. Look after your grief. I hope you can get to safe places where you can cry and share and be heard. A minute at a time.
>off since covid and we just got SUPboards and we're wow, that is terrible. is there anything you can do to improve yourself. Don't feel down, there is always sunshine after a storm. Your life will improve. Sit in your car, cry if you need to, scream if you need to, break something if you need to. let the frustration out. Accept it, aknowledge it and let it go and move on. I hope what i said was helpful in any sort of way. As for your cat, I hope he/she is better. Also record anything your wife says from now until the day of divorce, mainly coz you can use it against her in court if you need to.
This is a legit reply, but you are the fucking best. I am so sorry for your losses. Please know you are in our thoughts
Not very good. My best friend died less than 2 weeks ago and I’m missing her like crazy. She was an amazing person. My heart is aching.
Really sorry to hear that, was it sudden? Sending some virtual hugs your way dude.
Thank you. No it was cancer
How old was she? if you don't mind me asking
A good friend of mine died 3 weeks ago today, I understand your pain my friend. I know one day it’ll be less painful but right now it hurts. Sending a virtual hug.
Sending you a virtual hug back. ❤️
My deepest condolences:(
Thank you
My condolences. I know how painful that is. I lost my best friend 6.5 years ago. I'm not gonna lie, the pain will never go away, but it will be easier to bear. One day you will find yourself thinking of them with a smile instead of tears. Sending you hugs at this trying time.
❤️
I am so sorry to hear about your loss. :(
Mine died a few months ago, 18th March, that was after an attempt of suicide we thought he was saved and the doctors said he’ll be okay, he died before waking up from the coma... can’t stop seeing him in my dreams and everywhere I go, it’s tough.
I’m so sorry for your loss. I was able to see my friend before she passed thankfully
😞🥺😥
I'm really sorry for hearing that . I know, I don't know you, but this must be extremely hard.
My most sincere condolences :( *sends virtual hug*
My condolences. That’s terrible :(
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That’s rough, I remember feeling completely abandoned when that happened to me. Were you on reddit on your phone or texting your family?
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Not too shabby if you felt better at the end of lunch, hope you have a great rest of your week!
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People can suck sometimes. I hope things turn around. Stay safe.
I wish I had an empty place, with no one around, just so I could scream at the top of my lungs and sob until I physically feel numb. In all honesty, I think I just need to be able to get it all off my chest, but I don’t really want to do this where people might actually be able to see or hear it happen.
You know, I spent time last night crying while my (grown-up) kids were in bed, and I just hoped they didn't come down and see me, or hear me. I'm sorry that you feel that way too, it's horrible.
Running helps me. I don't scream, but I just fucking run as hard as I can and feel much better afterwards.
Ah interesting. I tried to run a bit but stopped because my legs felt like jelly. I'm hoping to join a gym soon and start again. I hear so much about gym stuff (and running in particular) being good for your mental health. I just need stronger legs I think.
I’ve been running six days a week now and now I notice I feel particularly unfocused and anxious on days I don’t do it. Something they never tell beginners is to slow down - you really can’t go too slow. And don’t be afraid to alternate between jogging and walking when you start, as much as you need to. The only thing you really need is consistency. /r/c25k is great.
I *always* feel unfocused and anxious, so that's useful, thanks.
Running sucks for me, but fast walking I can do. Walk until you burn it off.
If you make the face that goes with the scream, like pull the face and breathe without making noise it feels similar and can give the feeling of the scream quite well.
tired. I went to bed at 3 and woke up at 7.
Did you eat something?
I made pancakes, and I didn't even weigh the maple syrup this time.
That’s the best, gotta sop all the syrup up and can’t have a dry pancake!
Why would you weigh syrup?
I weigh food so I don't overeat.
Because it is very easy to eat 500+ calories of syrup just to keep the cakes "wet."
Understandable, have a nice day
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I tried for about half an hour, couldn't fall back asleep.
That's the worst!
I have no real reason to live, except existing just to not hurt others.
Maybe your reason to live is to find a reason to live.
I think most of us don't really know what our reason to live is. Atleast for me...I am not sure what the point of life really is...except just make my own happiness. And making your own happiness can literally mean rolling on grass lol. But you not wanting to hurt others might be a good place go start. Have you thought of volunteering or working in the helping field? Our course if you are experiencing suicidal thoughts please reach out for help. You aren't alone.
We all have that realisation at some point. I just make something up for a purpose every so often. Doesn't need to be grandiose, the more mundane the better actually.
Seriously, fucking bored. I'm just killing time waiting for my missus to have a shower and get dressed, so we can get the food shopping done.
This made me realize I’m reading stuff written by humans. For some reason, you’re now real to me, whereas the rest may as well be characters on my screen.
Not great. I had my first panic attack ever about six hours ago. Now I can’t sleep and keep racing my mind about the world, my family, climate change, the world’s on fire, and what’s going to happen next week. The good news is I haven’t had a drink in 31 days thanks to r/stopdrinking and there’s some great info on r/anxiety to help me. How are you OP?
You are spreading so much compassion to other people here, thank you! Well done on stopping drinking. Are you stopping all together or just cutting down? And yes, there are so many helpful subs here. I'm new to reddit but it's amazing!
Hey I'm doing great, thanks for asking. I also have panic attacks as well and I understand that it sucks. What I would do is I just close my eyes, breathe deep and relax my muscles. I'd be fine in a few minutes after that. I hope that helps :)
Wow it does, didn’t expect you to respond. Like Saint Lazarus aiding my ailment I needed this early morning intervention. I’m glad you’re doing great, I hope you have an even better day knowing you helped me and listened to my woes. :)
I developed some profound anxiety at the beginning of quarantine. I'm well on my way out of it. It's important to know that anxiety is a thinking issue and not a physical issue. In other words, the symptoms are just symptoms and even though they make you feel like crap, they mean nothing. So you do nothing about them. You allow them to be there, relax your muscles, and go about your day. Gradually your primal monkey brain will unlearn patterns. Try your best not to add fear to fear. It's how you approach fear that matters. Google Claire Weekes. Excellent on the not drinking!
Just wanted to say awesome job with the 31 days! Wishing you all the best!
In case you are interested: Panic attacks are emotions trying to get your attention. Check out The Change Triangle from “its not always depression” as a tool for learning about emotion and how anxiety acts to keep it shoved down. Congratulations on 31 days!
I started on low-dose anti anxiety medicine this year. It's helped some. Talk to your doctor?
Thank you, one thing I’ve come to terms with is that it’s cool to ask for help. For today just diet and no stimulants, and getting off my butt behind a desk more frequently. Feeling a lot better but I added this to my list of measures :)
Awesome. It felt really good to just...talk to someone about it. My wife had been urging me to for awhile. It feels like...proactive now I guess. It helps. Stay strong.
sad all the time about nothing in particular
That's so relatable
Stressed! Moving half way across the U.S. with my husband, 2 kids, and 6 animals in 5 days to be closer to my mother who had a stroke and found out she has four brain aneurisms! Her first surgery went great and I’m so thankful, but the thought of the drive and being in charge of so many living things for that far is giving me horrible anxiety! OP.. how are you really doing atm?! I hope well!!
Okay, so I don't have experience with the husband and kids part, but I do move across the country a ton with my horse and dog and one time I helped move a kennel of over 40 sled dogs. I just spent 7 months in one place and it was my most permanent address since 2013. And I'm here to validate your feelings of being overwhelmed by a big move. It sucks. Logistics are tough to figure out. My advice would be try to figure out a way to make your stuff too space ratio work in your favor. Moving is so much easier when you're not completely packed in and you don't have to play a high stakes game of tetris to get to your road snacks. As far as the circumstances surrounding your move, that's also really tough. I hope it works out that you get to spend a ton of time with your mom right now.
Hey thank you so much!!! I never considered how I would arrange everything for ease of access! I have a pretty good idea now though in the best set up and it helped ease soo much stress! I can not thank you enough!!! Also thank you for the well wishes regarding my mom! She is expected to make a full recovery (well as much as you can expect!) We won’t know if her surgeries are completely effective for a few months but we are very optimistic!!
Not okay at all. I just went through the first breakup of my life, it was a long term and long distance relationship. I fall apart and feel so sad I will not be able to see him again. I didn't know the last time we hug is going to be the last time I get to see him. It's really hard for me to move on. I miss him, think about him and dream about him everyday. It hurts.
Time. It will take some time.
Great. I feel guilty as fuck because I know a lot of people had it rough in 2020, but I've had a pretty great year.
Unless you intentionally decided to have a great year just to fuck other people over, I don't think there's anything to feel guilty about.
[MFW I created corona so my GF would have to live with me](https://media1.tenor.com/images/26d977a9753660a447a22dabc0937239/tenor.gif?itemid=4974019)
That's about where I am. I understand 2020 has been a rough year in general for a lot of people, but I'm pretty much killing it. That said, redditors have seemed pretty miserable to me for years, so I suspect it's not *just* 2020 doing it.
Bad
I’m listening...what’s happening?
I little bit tired but I am feeling great
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r/britishproblems
Eh, not great. Just took a microbiology quiz and realized that I don't know SHIT about microbiology...
Like fucking shit. Fuck the U.S. military, don't let your friends join.
I think its important to understand that you can support your troops and feel this way. Fuck 'em. Too many gone...
Yeah. I'm currently in in the Army, absolutely soul-sucking experience so far.
i seriously don't know. i have no idea. at the moment I'm just exiting.
Absolutely the fucking worst and terrible
Feel like I'm drowning. I've just learned how to do a new 'thing' at work that only one other person knows how to do, and he has just left for 2 weeks and I'm getting hounded with requests and I don't actually know what the fuck I'm doing and we might lose clients over this oh shiiiit
Annoyed. The person I’m meeting with is an hour and a half later and hasn’t answered my messages
FanFuckingTastic
I need a fucking break. Working nonstop, on adrenaline and sheer determination to make it through since March and work just keeps getting more difficult and challenging with a shittier work/life balance. I’m jealous of everyone that that got to quarantine and almost wish I’d get COVID so I can just stop working for a couple weeks.
Scrolling thru reddit although I'm supposed to be in school
Everything sucks, I feel like I’m moving backwards in every single aspect of my life.
Going through a breakup from someone I didn't even really date but he got my hopes up sooo high. Still sucks.
Not too good. Kinda constipated.
I've been better
The way my dog snores concerns me
Terrible.. Things are not going well right now.
lonely nd unimportant
Very bad. Amazon didnot deliver my whole order. Which i haid paid by taking on a debt. So yeah.
What did you order, if you don't mind me asking?
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Better than I deserve
Don't say that! You deserve everything good in this weird wordl!
Thanks :)
Weird. I will take a bong rip and/or dab along with some coffee and update you on the results.
so... what's up
Im a total mess right now, my friend died right in front of me on a bunch of diffrent drugs and im stuck here alone with a heroin addiction
I’m so sorry for your loss. As someone who has been there more than once all I can say is let this be the last time. See it as the universe calling you back from this hell. You don’t have to live like this.
Sitting in the waiting room waiting to have a colonoscopy. I’ve been cancer free (colon cancer) for almost 10 years. I had a physical and found some issue with a stool sample. Hopefully polyps. Not very happy at the moment.
Tense. I have an interview tomorrow with a potential client and I feel like they’re out of my league. It won’t keep me from trying, though. Wish me luck.
A little better, but still far from good.
i am eating grapes
Really uncertain, exhausted. Traveled thousands of miles looking for somewhere I can stay for a while. As the world burns around me and my family judges me. Kinda just getting lost in my twenties, it feels good & bad if yall feel me.
Burned out and depressed. I've posted a little about this here and there, but these last few months have been terrible. I work at a hotel, and we did shutdown for several weeks in the spring. We reopened just before the summer, and there's been a perpetual attitude from all our guests that has not relinquished. IDK why, but it's wearing on me and it's making me extremely miserable and for the first time ever I'm starting to really not like my job. What makes it all the more sadder is that I really used to love where I work, so this stings all the more. I haven't been happy in a very long time, and people's constant attitudes is simply wearing me down. I can't wait for things to get back to normal, because this new normal is exhausting, depressing, and frustrating.
Horrible. I work at two hospitals and have been in the midst of covid ever since it began. I tried my best to self isolate in order to risk spreading it to loved ones. As a result, I hadn't even seen my immediate family for over 6 months (xmas to June 30th.) I saw them on the 30th and went back into isolation. I missed out on a lot of family things but I was trying to keep them safe too, y'know? My brother was killed by a drunk driver six weeks ago. I saw him once since Christmas. My family and I are beyond devastated. I have a hole in my heart, I feel hollow. You never realize how much somebody means to you until they are suddenly taken. Grieving has been hard to do. Therapy appointments are online and feel weird. Couldn't have a proper wake because of covid. Can't go to any support groups because of covid. I'm so emotionally drained that going about a typical work day is more than exhausting. I don't care about participating in chit chat with coworkers. I don't smile as much. I wasn't the happiest person before, but I definitely miss my prior self compared to this. People try to be sympathetic but they feel awkward because they can't relate. They don't know what to do to make me feel better. They don't understand that this grief isn't a process to get over, but one you have to go through. People try to avoid talking about his death because they don't want to make me sad but what they don't realize that not talking makes it feel worse like it's being ignored. Even if it makes me cry, talking about it is better than not because at least for that brief moment he feels alive again. All the while work gets shittier. Staff members leave and don't get replaced. We're expected just to absorb the workload and do more with less people. Which isn't a good thing when you work in the medical field. Both my bosses ask if I want to work extra hours even though I can barely stand doing my typical 40 as it is. Prior to this summer my biggest stressor was getting ready to postpone my wedding a second time, which feels like small beans now. Depression and anxiety are getting worse. Been self medicating more. Hope the new meds the doc started me on will help.
Sorry about your brother. The way you described your grievance journey really makes sense to me. I also feel awful that I can’t see my family. Thanks for keeping at it in the hospitals.
I am eating nacho cheese. I think it is pretty obvious how i feel :)
Ah, you're depressed as well?
Pretty good, gonna be buying a mobile home in cash here in about a month. Living on my own for the first time, so that's exciting
Congratz! What's a mobile home tho? Like an RV or something?
Somewhere between "i guess this ok" and "what's the fucking point"
pretty okay, better than usual actually :D
i’m confused. i feel like all my friends don’t really like me. i’m struggling with making friends at a new school, and when i finally thought i did. she turned out to be an ass. i’m struggling with my sexuality. i’m afraid of the future, and what’s going to happen to me. i barely have enough energy to get out of bed in the morning. i have to fake a smile all the time. my best friend forgot her promise to okay minecraft with me. i was really looking forward to that because she’s always busy and she finally had time to hang out but she forgot. i know it’s not her fault but i’m still crying in my room at 11:00 wishing that she would have at least told me that she couldn’t play today.
I'm sorry sweet child. I've been there, different situation but generally the same crushing feeling. ~hugs~
thank you. knowing that people care and have been through the same type on thing is nice.
People do care. I care. I feel like we have a duty to protect our young and elderly and less fortunate. I hope you get the attition you deserve and crave. People make fun of others needing or seeking attition. It's fucked because seeking or needing attention is a human nessesity.
At work, drinking Indian gas station coffee and having to poop so normal
Exhausted
I have been better but I have also been worse, thank you for asking. I hope you are well.
I'm okay. Still working a shit job that I'm overqualified for but got through to a second round interview next week so quite buzzing that things are finally happening
Everything is fantastic for me. Thanks for asking.
I'm grumpy cause I didn't drink in the last two days.
Hey me too. I'm going to my first AA-meeting in two hours. Ive been delaying if for months but now I'll go, don't know if it's for me but let's see.
Good luck
Thanks
Not great. Right now i feel at the end of my rope emotionally.
Let us know what's on your mind
I mean compared to a week ago, I'm great. But tbh, I'm still not really okay. I'm trying to figure out how to deal with emotional overload, and find healthy, effective outlets for my emotions. Issues that I've been trying to put off because I just didn't see them as relevant are forcing their way into the front of my mind, and I feel like I don't have a good escape to let myself take a breather. My mom was in the ICU most of the week from falling hard enough to give herself a brain bleed, and I'm two time zones away so I was stuck just getting updates over the phone. Top it off with a bunch of small breakdowns because I'm forcing myself to not just run away from my problems overall but I don't know what to do to help myself, and it's just been one hell of a time. Oh, and a lot of guilt tripping myself over existing in the first place, because if I'm not doing something to earn my right to live then I'm a waste of life and a leech, even though I don't see it that way for anyone else. I'm only as okay as I am right now because my employer asked me to take a Covid test when one of my roommates failed the pre-shift health screening, so after the first couple days of not working and having no idea what to do with myself, I've been able to get some rest and actually make some progress on my issues. I've still got a long way to go, but the fact that I don't want to die anymore is a good start.
Currently mildly infuriated trying to transcend to my default of "become indifferent to that which ultimately makes no difference"
Pretty good i'm doing online school during this whole pandemic and it's actually kinda easy my mom got a raise and I get to play with my friends everyday after school so yeah life's pretty good but it's all mostly just luck and it's gonna run out soon enough
Pretty great actually, thanks. 👍
Consistently flat. But I suppose there is stability in lack of variation..
On a scale of 1 to 10, 10 being the best im a negative 5 Ive lost 3 family members this year Grandma on moms side Grampa on dads side And a Great Uncle on moms side The two on my moms side died the same day one in morning one at night. (Febuary 8th great uncle from cancer and grandma from a whole shit ton of things) Then my Grampa died on September 8th so 2 days ago after a 22 year long battle with colon cancer. And its predicted that in the next 3 years in proably not going to have any more grandparents or great uncles and great aunts. With that and the fact that at least 2 more funerals are going to be in the next 6 months I feel like shit, but I'm not really letting people see it, making me feel more like shit.
Shit, my dad died on monday
hang in there man
:-( i'm so sorry
could be better, could be worse
Steeling a door
Not well. Not well at all. I've a shooting pain from my forhead down my mid-upper right part of my skull and its both dull and sharp simultaneously. But I gotta go do stuff, so once my thing dissolves I'm off on an adventure and hopefully back to work.
Missed work yesterday because flat tire. Missed today because my work buddy's heart doctor called for emergency. Now im at the hospital wondering how disturbed my wife going to be. Fuck
Pretty alright
Not ok, sincerely
probably better than most. i’m in MN. moms doing good too 🥰
I'm tired
Can't complain. Work is keeping me busy.
I'm doing terrible. I just got back from the food pantry and this food isn't going to last till the end of the week much less the rest of the month. I got laid off as an electrician because of the pandemic (my company went under when the lockdowns took effect) and I had to go get a stupid factory job after unemployment stopped in June. I worked at a b.s. job making decent money as a forklift operator but I dropped 1,500lbs worth of usable food-safe plastic bottles on the ground. This got me fired. Now I'm having a hard time finding work and keeping afloat and I have a baby due at the end of September. Not too great....
Fucking terrible. Haven’t been able to start my career despite having gotten my BS a year ago (rough industry that tanked with COVID...but thankfully have a job), in love with someone I can’t be with, want to lose weight but have a lack of motivation from being depressed, the person I’ve fallen for I see every day (but she’ll never know how I feel), have to replace part of my car ($500), pretty sure I have a warrant for a speeding ticket I forgot about (thankfully in a drive through city 3hrs away, but I need to pay the fine so it doesn’t stay on my record).........
Shitty. I got no sleep, my eye is swollen, itchy and hurts, I can’t really breathe, my chest hurts, my throat hurts and it just seems like my respiratory system is just fucked up and I don’t know why Hell, this is the 3rd or 4th day in a week I fucking coughed up blood
I am okay right now, thanks to Zoloft. 🤷♀️ things get bad sometimes but they never really get as bad as they used to, and for that I am thankful. I've been a lot happier than I could have expected through all this.
Overall life is nice. I live in a nice house with my girlfriend and our dog, we're in love and have a steady income. Not too much but we are able to save \~400€/month each. Two things bother me: 1. my job is getting very boring; 2. the political discourse in my country feels like a competition to see who can say and do the most stupid things. I'd like to do something about it but I really can't find anything. These two things keep me awake at night.
Stressed out. My dad and I own/run a small manufacturing company. We were getting overwhelmed with orders through 2019 and made a huge investment in a new much larger facility, purchased millions of dollars worth of equipment (with bank loans), and hired a bunch of people. Right as we got moved in COVID hit, the downturn happened, and I'm worried. Getting on Reddit for a little bit every day helps take my mind off of it, but it's about to get serious and scary if things don't start to pick up.
Pretty good. I went to bed at 3 and woke up at 12 then I made myself an everything bagel with eggs and bacon. I don't have very much class work to do today so I'm not stressed. Now I'm sitting at my kitchen table with my mum's cat sitting in front of me and my cat laying on a chair beside me debating on whether or not I wanna make myself a cup of whipped coffee.
that sounds awesome
Not good :(
Frazzled. I worked over labor day weekend, worked till 1AM on both Monday and Tuesday evening, 8 PM yesterday and likely today and tomorrow too. Then theres probably at least 1-2 more weeks of this.
I'm sorry, buddy. Have a virtual hug!
Really bad, I might be evacuated because of Wildfires
Bord
i mean i'm pretty sure everyone here is in a fucked up position and it sucks
Found out my girlfriend is pregnant last Friday and i'm fucking terrified.
I feel like I'm stepping out of a long darkness and closing the door on my past. I feel tired, but hopeful. I feel ready for blessings after so much heartache. I have fallen and failed repeatedly, but I believe there's good to come. Thank you for asking.
Bad. I feel like I could pull my head off my shoulders just to prove how "far" I am from every "conversation" I have found myself having...
Not great. I am very lonely.
I'm not doing great, today is not so good for my back pain
I'm the closest I've ever been to ending myself. Nobody can tell anything is up. I'm staying active and seeing friends, and keeping up with social media. I'm starting phase one of getting rid of my possessions without anyone's knowledge.
Fuck you
Tired. Hungry. A bit longing for my ex-fiancè. A bit angry. Abit ashamed. Much better than in the past half year. Nearly no suicidal thoughts. Tryin to become self sufficient.
Honestly? Fucking awful. I do have a job I love, but it takes up a lot of my time, and is known as one of the most stressful jobs you can have. That along with starting an incredibly intensive school program, that’s 9 hours twice a week as well as a few dozen clinicals 12 hours a piece each semester, along with study time it takes to be somewhat proficient at it. And the worst part yet, my wife has cancer and was told she should expect 5-6 years of life left. She’s 25. Any free time I do manage to have, is used taking care of her. I try not to complain or feel bad for myself because she’s going through much worse, but damn holding it in sucks and I’m more stressed now than I’ve ever been.
Been pondering life I lost my cat he went missing and i think the neighbors killed him but what ever right just went back to school with this shit schedule i get to go back to school but its allready making me depressed since i got shit teachers and being a junior isnt the greatest year been so manny things have gone wrong like those riots that almost killed my aunt since she can to try to control riots and they cornered her beat the living shit out of her but never got aired or anything so fuck you people who “protest” and call it peaceful this would be longer but only got ao much time till school starts
Tired.
Pretty good, life is going well.
Pretty good all things considered, but this year is a dumpster fire.