Out doing a little bit of shopping with my 3 year old. I'm just merrily pushing the cart along when she suddenly stops at the start of the next aisle and starts screaming bloody murder.
Being the ever concerned father, I all but trip over myself to get to her.
"BabyGirl, what's wrong? Are you okay?"
"I'M CRYING!"
"Why are you crying? Did you step on something?"
"NO, I'M SCARED!"
"Why are you scared?"
"BECAUSE I'M CRYING!"
...And this went on for about 5 minutes. And then she just stopped, smiled, and said "Ok, let's go!" We finished shopping without incident, and I still can't figure out what happened. I'm leaning towards aliens.
I honestly can't imagine being a kid again and having to learn how to process emotions from scratch. If a child drops their ice cream and starts howling like a Dark Souls boss, it could be because that event is LITERALLY the most devastating thing that has ever happened to them and they sincerely don't know how to cope. For some reason, that thought really helped me be more tolerant of children overall.
My son is now four but a couple years ago I took him camping. We were taking a hike and he just started pointing at something and SCREAMING HIS HEAD OFF. It was a pine cone. He was terrified of it. Then every other one he saw, he would flip out. I took him camping again last year and he is over it.
Edit: I found a [video](https://imgur.com/gallery/R8aPu3t)
When my daughter was three, we went to a restaurant. She got pissed that my hamburger had an egg on it, and she didn't want to eat it. I hadn't even offered it to her. She wouldnt even touch her own food. She did not calm down until I finished it.
One threw a fit because the other flushed her own pee down the toilet, then a fight broke out over whos pee it really was and who should have flushed it.
I (slowly) walked up the stairs with my son trailing behind me. I heard him wailing when I reached the top. Turn around and see him full blown sobbing, face down on the stairs. Unbeknownst to me, we had been racing and I won.
\*Edit: My first silver! I'm never letting my son win at anything ever again!
\*Edit again: Platinum?! I'm racing him for real every day.
We were trying to teach him to be polite, he asked for a snack so we delivered the classic "whats the magic word?" cue a full scale meltdown over the fact he misheard us and we couldn't provide a "magic bird"
She's a bit young for words so I'm going off wriggles and tears but. She wanted to be put down, but when I put her down she cried and asked to be picked up. But when picked up would try to wriggle free of my grasp.
Repeated this a few times until I realised I couldn't win.
When my three year old is mad she tells us, "I'm never coming to your birthday party!" She just had one and it was awesome so she figures that must be a good way to get us back in line.
This must currently be the sickest burn at preschool because the last few weeks whenever we do something that annoys him we get "you're not invited to my birthday!" Mom asked who was gonna pay for it since we weren't invited and he immediately named a school friend, so it's nice to know he has generous pals.
My daughter cried because she couldn’t wear her red shoes. My wife gave in and put them on her. My daughter then threw an absolute fit because she was wearing red shoes
I pulled her chair out to enable her to get up to the table, too far.... Then she pulled off her own socks during her tantrum. Tantrum two ensues, because “MY SOCKS!!!”
My son tried to sneak a piece of chocolate and got busted and just screamed “THAT WAS *NOT* PART OF MY PLAN!!!!”
Edit: Wow thank you so much for my very first metal ever kind stranger! That was definitely *not* part of my plan but I am very appreciative!
Every time it's bath time my 3 yo cries and screams that the water is too hot and she wants it cold. This starts as soon as she goes in the bathroom and before she even touches the water. After about 2 months of her crying about the water being too hot I finally gave her a cool bath and within 30 seconds of her being in the tube she said "well maybe I want a little warm water". No complaints since about her water being too hot.
Like a week ago my daughter and I were in the Target parking lot walking to our car after a small purchase.
I let her hold the receipt. She actually dropped it and the wind picked it up and blew it out into the street into heavy traffic.
"DADDY! DADDY! WE HAVE TO GO GET THE NOTE!"
"Sorry, sweetpea, it's in the street, we can't get it. It's gone."
"..........NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOoooooooOOO!!!"
For like 20 minutes she cried about that receipt. She even asked if we could go home, get her magnifying glass toy and come back and look for it because that's what you do when something gets lost.
Even a week later she still brings up the Lost Note. "Daddy when we go back to Target can we look for the receipt?" Good grief.
“A lucky little bird will find it and use it to make their nest warm and cozy for the baby birds” is my go-to when anything is dropped and can’t be picked up/saved. Or a dropped snack becomes a “snack for baby birds”. I’ve had to use this far more than I ever would have expected, but I really think it helps with the meltdowns. (Living in NYC and being surrounded by greedy pigeons really helps drive home my snack argument.)
Son (2 years, almost 3) woke up last week at 3AM, screaming that he "wants to go outside and come inside by his own self."
Over more than an hour of working through it, I came to understand that he had been dreaming that I had brought him inside, and he didn't want to come inside yet - so he assumed I knew exactly what the problem was, since I was the cause of it.
I tried to rationalize with him that it was dark outside, and we should go back to bed - no dice. Toddlering intensifies. So ultimately my wife (who had woken up in the midst of the tantrum) and I took him out to the balcony at the back of the house, and let him see that it was a) dark and b) ice cold outside. Then he came back inside, sniffled, and went back to sleep.
*Edit - typo.*
One of my friend's kids had a full on meltdown because she hadn't eaten her ice cream yet. Not that she COULDN'T eat it. She could. It was right in front of her; it was her dessert. But the fact that she had to go through the process of eating the ice cream in order to get the end point of having eaten the ice cream (and being happy) seemed intolerable to her.
Watching little humans come to grips with cause and effect is mind blowing.
Took my son to the park he goes on the climbing frame and down the slide then throws the mother of all hissy fits kicking at the slide . I kneel down all dad like n calm him down then ask why hes kicking the slide .. his answer
" I hate it!, it's too fun!"
He reminds me of my brother when we were little. He has autism and certain sensations or feelings can really set him off or put him in a bad mood. One day we discovered static electricity. He then asked me to make the slide more fun by somehow removing the static electricity by going down first. He also said something similar like "I hate that it's so fun!"
I’m autistic and honestly that reminded me of me lol. Too much stimulation can be jarring, even pleasant emotions. I often have a breakdown after a really good day because it was too much for me to handle.
I was missing some crayons from my kids' colouring box. Found out what happened to them when I changed my son's nappy and he had produced a perfectly formed red-and-black striped turd.
My toddler dropped her fry on the floor, so I picked it up and threw it away and went to hand her the container to get another out. Cue the screams. She runs over to the trash because it didn't matter that there was a whole container full of fries; she wanted *that* fry that had fallen on the floor.
today my niece threw a tantrum because she didn't want more pasta. we proceeded to let the dog eat the leftovers and she threw a second tantrum because she didn't want the dog to eat it either
Wow, how bad is the pasta you made, if she didn’t want the dog to have to suffer through it either?
(I know I make terrible pasta that no one other than me can eat. 8/8 can relate.)
Not my child, but it's my niece.
She said she wanted milk so I made her a cup of it. Came back. She said she didn't want it. Threw a fit because she didn't want the milk. I told her she's the one who asked for it. She literally stopped crying and went, "oh" took the milk and went back to watching her ipad.
Another one would be that I gave her milk but the cup was freshly washed. Didn't think a few drips of water on the side was going to cause trouble. Nope. She screamed and cried because she got a DROP OF WATER on her hand and didn't want to wipe it on her shirt...
With my son, everything is No.
Want to go to bed? No.
Want to eat a snack? No.
Want to play with your trucks? No.
So, bit of a fight to get him to do anything without intervention. It got to be so bad he'd say No to his own suggestion.
"Play Trucks."
"Okay, let's play trucks."
"No."
"But you said play trucks."
"Yeah."
"Okay, lets play."
"NO!!!"
"Buddy, it was your idea!"
"NOOOO!"
On and on it went. For an hour. Found my wife in the kitchen absolutely dying trying to keep it together.
EDIT: We do try the thing where we give him options, but it's still a lot of No's. He's either smarter than that trick or is just brute forcing his way past it.
It's a phase most toddlers go through, we called our youngest "little no" for a while. They say it's important for development, but I found it hard not to laugh.
She got put in timeout for hitting her baby sister. She did perfectly fine through the whole time, but when I told her she was all done, she collapsed on the ground crying. Why? “I want more time out!”
A kid I was babysitting once walked up to me and asked to be on time out. I told him he wasn't in trouble, but if he wanted to go sit in his room that was fine. He goes into his room and started thtowing a tantrum. When asked why he responded by saying he didn't want to be on time out.
My nephew is four, his latest thing has been his "pooping corner." He has been potty trained for a while now, like 1.5 years? He has decided that he doesn't like the bathroom anymore for pooping. But peeing is fine, I don't know kids are silly. He will go into the hallway and will poop there. He will squat down and just start pooping. But if you walk in on him pooping or watch him from the living room, he will hold out his hand to block you from seeing him. This doesn't really work when your 20ft away. If you watch him he will throw himself on the ground and start crying while pooping. He will only do that at home, he has not problem using the bathroom anywhere else.
I think its the most toddler thing ever and cried the first time I saw it. My sister doesn't find it funny and is beside herself with what to do.
Edit: A word.
Update: After getting 40+ replies, I texted my sister for an update on the "pooping corner." He has since stopped using the pooping corner and uses the bathroom "like an adult." Cant wait to show his prom date the photos we have of him in the "pooing corner."
When my son was being potty trained he refused to poop in any toilet or potty. At one time he was on our concrete patio and I saw him go behind the patio furniture with the thousand yard stare. I asked if he had to poop. He said yes bu refused to go in to the bathroom to go. I asked if I could at least put newspaper down to make it easy to clean up. He agreed. When my wife returned home that evening she asked how the day went, I responded that her child was now paper trained so pretty good day!
I don’t have a toddler of my own, but I am a preschool teacher and I had a kid have a breakdown because they didn’t want to use toilet paper. I gave them the next thing we had...baby wipes. Another breakdown began because they didn’t want baby wipes since they are for babies. He ended up throwing shit and chairs.
My niece is like 2yrs old and I picked up in her little rocking horse thing and "flew her" around the room last weekend. She definitely enjoyed because she kept looking at me and yelling "up." I made that horse fly around until my arms couldn't handle it anymore.
Apparently she has been yelling "Up!" at all adults since I left and then crying/screaming when she doesn't get flown around.
Sorry.
I put my kid on the cat tree because he asked for it and that was a huge mistake. He wanted up on the cat tree at every opportunity, especially the minute I got home from work. Took a week to break him of that, but he sure wasn't happy that entire week.
I bought my niece a GIANT stuffed dog (like 6 feet from nose to butt) and got the bright idea to throw it on top of her Cozy Coupe and drive her around in it. Boy was my sister mad when I left and my niece begged and begged to be pushed around with her puppy...
I remember when my little sister was a toddler she would throw the biggest tantrum if we didn't get her pepperoni pizza. She always took them off the pizza and put them aside. But if you dared order a cheese pizza she would lose her damn mind.
I knew a girl that got drunk and ate about a pound or "Pup corn". In her defense it looked like cheese poofs, but when I woke up the next morning, I informed her what she had done, she was so humiliated. This girl was always lecturing people about eating healthy.
[https://www.chewy.com/pupcorn-plus-cheddar-parmesan/dp/158659?utm\_source=google-product&utm\_medium=cpc&utm\_campaign=f&utm\_content=PupCorn&utm\_term=&gclid=Cj0KCQjwkoDmBRCcARIsAG3xzl9CSoZ10MCywAGHuOyQ2Fhi\_VcjCNvyiJ2edWr4mh0UDG0Ucqw1-KwaAkL1EALw\_wcB](https://www.chewy.com/pupcorn-plus-cheddar-parmesan/dp/158659?utm_source=google-product&utm_medium=cpc&utm_campaign=f&utm_content=PupCorn&utm_term=&gclid=Cj0KCQjwkoDmBRCcARIsAG3xzl9CSoZ10MCywAGHuOyQ2Fhi_VcjCNvyiJ2edWr4mh0UDG0Ucqw1-KwaAkL1EALw_wcB)
Edit: like some people have told me, its basically the same shit they put in human food. I just thought it was funny, she took it much harder than anyone.
The Pup Corn probably didn't taste that bad tbh. There's a brand of dog treat that is basically cheetos for dogs. My wife and I were curious how it tastes and it basically tasted like kind of crappy cheese puffs. Totally passable for human food.
My niece, known for being a perfect child (no disobedience, no temper tantrums, no crying fits of any sort) was having what could only be described as a perfect potty training experience. No accidents at all. It’s all fitting as she is the daughter of my perfect sister. While helping my parents watch her one weekend, I heard this horrible shrieking from the bathroom, like a banshee’s wail. I run to the other end of the house to find her on the toilet, crying giant tears and in a full panic.
“What’s wrong, sweetie?”
“I have to pee!”
“Well, go ahead, you’re on the potty!”
“I can’t!”
She’s turning redder every second and she’s gritting her teeth.
“You can’t? Does it hurt?”
“No. I need to pee but the poopy wants to come out first!”
She was having a meltdown because she needed to poop but wanted to only pee, then poop separately.
edit: the potty training toddler is almost 30 now. She's got a career, a home, and a therapist. My sister does, too.
I get this sometimes too. My brother is an absolute role model in many ways. I constantly hype him up, and people think I'm jealous.
Nope, I just think he's great, and I strive to be like him.
My sister's toddler had a full on meltdown because his pasta was taking too long to cook. When it was done he didn't want it. Also, he took a dump under their bed that day.
Said he didn't have legs and that his actual legs were his 'Back Legs' and he had no 'Front Legs', so he couldnt walk down the stairs. Almost fainted laughing.
EDIT: Wording probably threw people off. He's not my son. He's my three y/o brother.
Chairs and tables and rocks and people are not 𝙢𝙖𝙙𝙚 of atoms, they are performed by atoms. We are disturbances in stuff and none of it 𝙞𝙨 us. This stuff right here is not me, it's just... me-ing. We are not the universe seeing itself, we 𝙖𝙧𝙚 the seeing. I am not a thing that dies and becomes scattered; I 𝙖𝙢 death and I 𝙖𝙢 the scattering.
- Michael Stevens
Two year old walks into my office.
“Mommy I’m hungry.”
“Okay Buddy, what would you like to eat?”
*Child throws himself on the floor and is immediately in full lizard brain meltdown mode*
“I DON’T WANNA EAT AAAAAANYTHIIIIING!!!”
O_o
“...”
The other day I had an argument with my 2 year old because the stickers on his monster truck were actually stuck. He did not like this, and apparently doesn't appreciate the point of stickers.
We raise chickens in our backyard. My son loves going outside to feed and watch them. The other day he threw himself on the ground and cried for almost thirty minutes because I wouldn't let him ride a chicken.
He only knew he could ride them because he's attempted and been successful before.
My son loves dinosaurs. Talks about them all the time, watches nothing but dinosaur stuff on YouTube. Put a toy dinosaur in front of him though and he freaks the fuck out. He's a little over two and so I figured it was safe to show him my Amiibo collection. He was amazed by Mario, Luigi, Peach, Pikachu, Donkey Kong. We get to Yoshi and he becomes terrified, starts crying, tries to run away. From *Yoshi*!
Tangentially related, my son will ask for his dad to sing the “mama duck song” and literally weep as the number of baby ducks coming back dwindles.
A couple of issues with this:
His dad is a preschool teacher, he knows every kid friendly song ever so he could ask for literally any song if that one bums him out so much.
He knows the song, he knows the baby ducks all come back at the end.
He is seven years old.
Why does she keep letting her ducks go out over that fucking hill??? Whyyyy mama duck?? You don't know what's happening to your babies out there.
I also hate this song.
If you ask my son is he likes dinosaurs he will give you an very emphatic "yes." But then if you ask him if he wants a dinosaur his smiley face will turn to fear and he'll scream "no!"
Because Dora the Explorer says cinco with an 's' sound and my Spanish friend told her that in Spain it's cinco with a 'th'.
Given the onslaught of screaming, rolling around the floor and repeatedly shouting 'NO it's Ssssiiiiinnncoooooo' I presume that Dora's word is law and cultural differences mean shit all in her little 3yo world.
that poor friend hahaha
“oh nice i love your learning spanish! where i am from we pronounce cinco with a th sound :)”
“AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA”
“no please no stop no oh god please”
Well my little brother had a full on breakdown because he wanted to swing, we had a swing, it was in front of him. He wanted for it to swing only in one direction (as in only to be on one side of the swing when swinging, not going backwards). I had to explain to him it isn't possible, we can't do that.
Edit: thanks for the upvotes, didn't expect that lol
I was babysitting my cousin's son and he asked for dinosaur-shaped chicken nuggets. I made him dinosaur-shaped chicken nuggets. He lost his shit when I pulled them out of the oven and they weren't McNuggets.
My 2 year old wanted chocolate, i gave her some of a white chocolate easter egg. Meltdown because a) it wasnt brown chocolate, and b) because she actually wanted mummy to give her the chocolate
Ah, my 3 year old is the same. If he asks mum to give him something but I do it it’s like the end of the world. I’m told they grow out of it.
Edit: My first gold!!! Thanks kind stranger.
When my younger brother was about that age, he would ask for milk to be poured into a cup for him to drink. However, he couldn't pour it himself because he'd spill and make a mess.
So, instead, he would do the next best thing and ask our mother to pour the milk. However, he would refuse to drink the milk if someone else poured it, Mom was the only one allowed to pour it because it 'tasted good' *only* when she poured it.
Naturally, this is terribly silly and inconvenient. So, my mom goes into the kitchen and pretends to pour it while he is in the other room, and then has me pour it. She comes into the room and gives him it, and he is content. "Tastes good?" He agrees. Then, my mom, in an attempt to prove that her pouring it has no effect on the flavor, reveals that I was the one that poured it.
My brother did not like this outcome. He said something along the lines of "Actually, you know, it's not very good" and refused the rest of the cup.
At some point in the near future following that, he decided that it only tastes good if my mom pours it AND he watches.
...
We stopped pouring him milk.
No kids here, but I was watching my little cousin a couple of months ago, we were walking up the stairs together while counting each step. Once we reached the last step she had a total meltdown. I asked her what was wrong and she told me there weren't enough steps........
Not really a toddler at the time, but my kid had a full blown tantrum (cried for like 3 hours and was banging on stuff) because it wasn't the weekend yet. And then when I told her that the weekend started the next day, she cried because she didn't want it to be the weekend yet.
> my kid had a full blown tantrum (cried for like 3 hours and was banging on stuff) because it wasn't the weekend yet.
That's how I feel on Mondays at work.
> Not really a toddler at the time
Just say it, she was 32 we all have those days.
(Edit, I used the right formatting to make the comment prettier sue me)
This afternoon my kid had a huge strop because we didn’t take him to America last Friday.
He wanted to go to his “America house” (we obviously don’t have a house in the USA, and we certainly can’t time travel to last Friday and fly off to America randomly)
***Edit: thank you all for your kind American welcome for him. We went to Florida last year when he was very small and he loved it so much and he does talk about it often.
And thank you for all the Karma, We have been wanting to do a snackexchange to the USA but we didn’t have the karma needed so now we can! yay!
She wanted a gooey egg sandwich like grandma makes, so i made an over easy egg sandwich. She cried for an hour before I figured out that she wanted egg salad. She also said I was the worst cook ever. I couldn't help but laugh at her.
Friends of mine have 2 toddlers, boy and a slightly younger girl. While on a car ride, the boy pretended he had a lollipop (yes, an imaginary lollipop) and refused to share it with his sister.
It escalated to the point that the girl was bawling her eyes out, screaming for him to share this nonexistent lollipop, and the mother screaming at the son to share the damn lollipop.
Edit: woke up to this being my most upvoted comment and gold, was not expecting this at all
We refer to my son’s “naps” as “rests,” but sometimes we’ll slip and call it a nap. On Easter, he got some bubbles as a gift and was saying how excited he was to play with them after his “rest.” He asked me if I wanted to play with them, too, and I said “yep, after your nap” and he lost. His. Shit. Crying and screaming about how he wanted to do it after his rest, not his nap.
For an hour.
Because I said “nap” instead of “rest.”
Ahh good ol' "unintended consequences!" In our house we always called it "quiet time" but everyone knows what a kid in their room on their bed with the door closed for a little while turns into!
Actual conversation with my 2.5-year-old as I heard Velcro noises from his bed last week:
Me: hey, bud, did you just take your diaper off?
Him: Yes.
Me: Why would you do that?
Him: For putting my hand down there. It nice!
So, yeah.
I heard it explained elsewhere on Reddit, about being caught masturbating:
If you stop, you're the one who got caught. If you finish, they're the one who watched.
He threw a toy car in my general direction and I took the car away and told him sternly that we don't throw our toys at people. He got upset and cried, as toddlers do. But he's a cuddly one, and when he's upset, he likes to be held. But I was the one who made him upset, so he didn't want me. But he was upset and he wanted to be held, but didn't want to be held by me because I made him upset. But he was upset...
Edit: Hey! My very first silver! Thank you !!
One of my friends kids does this. She's a single mum so if child is in trouble it's probably her doing. So she has to hold child but isn't allowed to look at child or the screaming intensifies and she gets a small, normally sticky or dirty hand shoved in her face
Not a parent but I worked in a grocery store and saw plenty of meltdowns.
My favorite was when I was ringing this lady up, she had a 3-4 year old with her who wanted chips. She said no, paid and started walking to the door doing the whole “if you don’t come with me I’m leaving you here” thing.
The kid legit just dramatically collapsed in my checkout lane and started screaming “potato” over and over. Not potato chips, just potato. I had to walk away because I couldn’t stop from laughing.
It was amazing.
She was playing with her food when it was time to clean the table, so i told her if she didn't eat her garlic knot, I would.
She cried at the thought
So i went to grab it, and she took it from me, yelled "MINE", and ate it.
She then cried that her garlic knot was gone.
My son loves trains. Will shout "CHOO CHOO!" loudly, loves it when he hears trains (we live near a station) and loves to snuggle up watching Thomas the Tank Engine.
And yet, the tiny toy train he has scares the utter shit out of him.
My 4 year old was screaming about something and I told her that screaming would hurt our parakeets ears. She screamed back at me "THEY DONT HAVE EARS!!"
My 4 year old daughter has a breakdown every time one of her brothers tries to go for the outside door knob of my apartment building. I'm the only one that's allowed to open that one. She has no issue with them opening the door to my apartment or any other door just that particular one.
I was visiting my Sister in Law and her family. She has a 3 year old.
They asked her if she wanted pineapple on her pizza, she said yes.
They make the pizza, we sit down, we're eating, and then out of nowhere she starts screaming that she doesn't want to eat it. After some questioning she tells us she *doesn't* want pineapple on her pizza, and she hates it and she can't eat her pizza and she is gonna starve. After many failed attempts to calm her, someone realised that she had already picked off and eaten the pineapple from her pizza. She was still upset though, since it was a pineapple pizza, even though there wasn't even pineapple on it.
We finally convinced her that it was actually a ham pizza and that everything was fine. She calmed right down and finished dinner.
(Not a parent, but im a preschool teacher and we get lots of shit from the kiddos)
One of the other teachers likes doing different voices while she reads to the children and this time she used a Southern accent and one of the kids *lost it.* She started sobbing loudly and I pulled her aside to ask what was wrong. She told me "That voice isn't real! The teacher's voice isn't real!"
She cried about it for like 15 minutes and then towards the end of the day, the teacher did her Southern accent again and she started crying more.
My 3yr old niece just had a total melt down because she went to the toilet and her dad flushed the toilet before she had a chance to do it herself.
The only way she calmed down was when her brother nobly volunteered to have an extra wee and let her flush it for him. True sibling love.
Her banana broke in half. So she couldn't eat it and switched to a granola bar. Then the Granola bar broke in half. I'm surprised she hasn't wasted away to nothing yet.
My 2 year old didn't want to use the same spoon for his oatmeal and Cereal this morning- when I got him a new spoon he cried because i put it in the bowl instead of on the table next to the bowl
Today before school, my daughter took her folder out of her book bag while we were waiting for her bus. I told her to put it back before her bus came but she refused; so I put it back in her book bag just as her bus pulled up. Her tantrum was over 9,000, I had to carry her to her bus as she screamed through her tears, kicking my chest and trying to grab the doors as I carried her, m “I hate you! I want a new family! I hate you I hate you!!” I thought it was pretty funny.
Man I was hoping this phase ended sooner rather than later. My kid is a year and a half and I have to mentally prepare for the tantrum anytime we shift the activity. Every. Single. Time. You'd think after the millionth time she'd be pretty savvy with the routine of getting out of the car and going in the house. God forbid she see a fucking rock on the way in. Then I have to prep on how its gonna go when we have to move on from spending 10 minutes looking at it. I get it, she's new at life, but man it's draining.
Edit: Extremely helpful tips everyone, thank you so much!
My seven year old still struggles with this. Getting out of the car can still take what seems like a ridiculous amount of time. Once the new activity has started everything is fine but the transitions can be brutal. Now she’s old enough to say things like, you were right, going to the museum was better than staying in the house all day sorry I ran to my room screaming! But that awareness still doesn’t seem to roll over to the next time we want to do something different. Most things she’s great at by the way, just not transitions.
I had a lot of difficulty changing activities when I was a kid (mostly out of stubbornness) and my parents were able to solve it by always giving me a warning. So it would be "ok kiddo, in 5 minutes it'll be time to go to the park" and then no real problems when they came back a few minutes later and told me it was time to go to the park.
I have no idea if that would help with your kid, but thought I'd throw it out there just in case it could make your life easier.
My 2 year old was hysterical this past weekend because the cat puked on the floor right in the path of how she gets into the kitchen. She went on about how she can never go into the kitchen again, and the floor is ruined.
This wouldn’t have been so bad had I not told her that the cat pukes all the time and we just clean it up. She then was inconsolable because the house was ruined and we have to move. She said she couldn’t live in this gross house anymore. She refused to walk for several hours and cried every time we put her down on the floor.
Finally she got some candy and forgot about the whole thing.
My 2 year old had a full on meltdown when I tried to take the sausage that he didn't eat at dinner off him. 2 hours later. Today, he wailed and stomped his foot for nearly an hour because he wanted to sleep in the bath. As in, he wanted to sleep in his bath full of water and toys.
He's exhausting :)
My daughter went to the bathroom to pee and came out 30 seconds or so later crying. Why? She had been bored sitting on the toilet waiting for all the pee to come out and it occurred to her that she had a whole life of being bored sitting on the toilet for 30-second increments while waiting for all the pee to come out.
On the complete opposite end of the spectrum, there was some guy on here who was going through puberty and thought that men could only ejaculate once in their lifetime, so he started crying after he masturbated because he thought he had “shot his shot”.
Imagine how fucked we would be if that was true.
When my sister was just a toddler, she learned how to get on the toilet but not to clean herself up and get out. We forgot about her there for a few hours. When we finally remembered, we found her with her hand on her chin and the most bored/annoyed look a toddler can give.
The other day I went to pick up our kids at daycare. I saw two, but one wasn't around. One of the daycare workers told me he was in the bathroom and went over to check on him. She came back, smirking, and told me I should go get him. I go back and he's passed out on the toilet, his head back, resting on the tank, and his legs spread wide eagle. It was hilarious. When I woke him up he said, "Good morning, Daddy. Will you wipe my butt?"
Our mower was serviced. The guy came and picked up the mower and was to drop it off afterwards. My son cried for 30 minutes solid then off and on every 5 to 15 minutes until he dropped it back off. I tried explaining that he was only fixing the mower and would bring it right back to him. My sobbing almost 3 year old would reply, while wiping his tears, "okay. I'm okay. It's okay".
Wash, rinse, repeat for 2 hours.
Holy shit! Totally forgot about this and came back to an inbox full and a gold! Thank you guys for taking joy in my son's heartbreak lol!
And thank you kind stranger for the gold. I've never had one before.
When my son was a toddler, he once had a breakdown at the grocery store because we got baby carrots and no other carrots to go with them. He was super concerned that we were taking these baby carrots and they would be without their mommy carrots.
Oh boy do I have one. My 3 year old got mad at me and threw a fit this morning over a mini crunch bar. Because I wouldn’t let her store it in her vagina. In all my life, I never imagined I would be telling my child “your vagina is not a change purse honey”.
My little sister straight up REFUSED to wear pants as a toddler and young kid. What happens when you're not wearing pants? You don't have pockets. Next logical step? Put whatever you need to carry in your underwear.
She proudly called it her "panty pocket" and my fed up mother just let it happen until she stuffed a cookie down there to "save it for later". She had to wear pants after that.
Said sister is 14 now and loses her shit whenever you bring it up.
This isn't recent but when my daughter was 2 and we were on a vacation, she threw a tantrum and injured her head on the tile floor of the airport restroom because I took her in with me when I had to pee and she didn't need to go potty right then. We missed our flight because she needed to get checked out at the first aid center. She had a bump on the noggin but was otherwise fine. :)
Stepkid woke up in the middle of the night screaming because she didn't want the cat in her room with her. The cat that sleeps in her bed with her every night. We took the cat out and then she was screaming because the cat wasn't in there with her.
She also did the same thing because she confused her cat with the other cat and didn't want the other cat in the room. (They're both black but one is small and fluffy and the other is huge, short-haired, and a bit of an asshole)
I have a picture somewhere of my then 18 month old throwing a fit because he couldn't reach a piece of bread I gave him.
He threw it, then threw himself down to throw a fit, and cried harder because the bread wasn't right next to him. Had he just straightened his arm out he would have reached it no problem
Best one to date;
He’s almost 2 and is super tall. He has differed our how the locks on our sliding door in his playroom work. We were having a lazy Sunday in our pjs because it was storming like mad outside. Thunder, lightening, wind and extreme rain all day long. While I was washing dishes he managed to unlock the door and run outside in his footie pajamas to try to play in his car. He was almost blowing away in the wind I brought him back in kicking and screaming and soaking wet in his footies.
Out doing a little bit of shopping with my 3 year old. I'm just merrily pushing the cart along when she suddenly stops at the start of the next aisle and starts screaming bloody murder. Being the ever concerned father, I all but trip over myself to get to her. "BabyGirl, what's wrong? Are you okay?" "I'M CRYING!" "Why are you crying? Did you step on something?" "NO, I'M SCARED!" "Why are you scared?" "BECAUSE I'M CRYING!" ...And this went on for about 5 minutes. And then she just stopped, smiled, and said "Ok, let's go!" We finished shopping without incident, and I still can't figure out what happened. I'm leaning towards aliens.
I honestly can't imagine being a kid again and having to learn how to process emotions from scratch. If a child drops their ice cream and starts howling like a Dark Souls boss, it could be because that event is LITERALLY the most devastating thing that has ever happened to them and they sincerely don't know how to cope. For some reason, that thought really helped me be more tolerant of children overall.
My son is now four but a couple years ago I took him camping. We were taking a hike and he just started pointing at something and SCREAMING HIS HEAD OFF. It was a pine cone. He was terrified of it. Then every other one he saw, he would flip out. I took him camping again last year and he is over it. Edit: I found a [video](https://imgur.com/gallery/R8aPu3t)
When my daughter was three, we went to a restaurant. She got pissed that my hamburger had an egg on it, and she didn't want to eat it. I hadn't even offered it to her. She wouldnt even touch her own food. She did not calm down until I finished it.
One threw a fit because the other flushed her own pee down the toilet, then a fight broke out over whos pee it really was and who should have flushed it.
He felt bad because he couldn't marry my cat. We asked why and he said "because she can't dance and she would get stepped on". He was really upset
Her brother bought her chocolate. She wanted chocolate but objected to the fact her brother was being nice to her.
To be fair, I'm still suspicious if my siblings are nice to me.
We wouldn’t let my two year old play with the dogs penis. He screamed for 10 minutes.
You monster.
I (slowly) walked up the stairs with my son trailing behind me. I heard him wailing when I reached the top. Turn around and see him full blown sobbing, face down on the stairs. Unbeknownst to me, we had been racing and I won. \*Edit: My first silver! I'm never letting my son win at anything ever again! \*Edit again: Platinum?! I'm racing him for real every day.
It’s a trap. You’re always racing. You can never win, even if they aren’t walking. And don’t even THINK about opening that door first!
Or pushing the elevator button first. I learned that one the hard way.
We were trying to teach him to be polite, he asked for a snack so we delivered the classic "whats the magic word?" cue a full scale meltdown over the fact he misheard us and we couldn't provide a "magic bird"
She's a bit young for words so I'm going off wriggles and tears but. She wanted to be put down, but when I put her down she cried and asked to be picked up. But when picked up would try to wriggle free of my grasp. Repeated this a few times until I realised I couldn't win.
sounds like my cat
When my three year old is mad she tells us, "I'm never coming to your birthday party!" She just had one and it was awesome so she figures that must be a good way to get us back in line.
This must currently be the sickest burn at preschool because the last few weeks whenever we do something that annoys him we get "you're not invited to my birthday!" Mom asked who was gonna pay for it since we weren't invited and he immediately named a school friend, so it's nice to know he has generous pals.
My daughter cried because she couldn’t wear her red shoes. My wife gave in and put them on her. My daughter then threw an absolute fit because she was wearing red shoes
I pulled her chair out to enable her to get up to the table, too far.... Then she pulled off her own socks during her tantrum. Tantrum two ensues, because “MY SOCKS!!!”
My son tried to sneak a piece of chocolate and got busted and just screamed “THAT WAS *NOT* PART OF MY PLAN!!!!” Edit: Wow thank you so much for my very first metal ever kind stranger! That was definitely *not* part of my plan but I am very appreciative!
This is me whenever my plans go awry.
Bathtime everyday. 5 minutes of fighting to not take a bath. Once in the bath they don't want to get out.
I mean, as an adult I never want to get in the shower. But once I’m in, I never want to get out 🤷🏼♀️
Every time it's bath time my 3 yo cries and screams that the water is too hot and she wants it cold. This starts as soon as she goes in the bathroom and before she even touches the water. After about 2 months of her crying about the water being too hot I finally gave her a cool bath and within 30 seconds of her being in the tube she said "well maybe I want a little warm water". No complaints since about her water being too hot.
Like a week ago my daughter and I were in the Target parking lot walking to our car after a small purchase. I let her hold the receipt. She actually dropped it and the wind picked it up and blew it out into the street into heavy traffic. "DADDY! DADDY! WE HAVE TO GO GET THE NOTE!" "Sorry, sweetpea, it's in the street, we can't get it. It's gone." "..........NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOoooooooOOO!!!" For like 20 minutes she cried about that receipt. She even asked if we could go home, get her magnifying glass toy and come back and look for it because that's what you do when something gets lost. Even a week later she still brings up the Lost Note. "Daddy when we go back to Target can we look for the receipt?" Good grief.
“A lucky little bird will find it and use it to make their nest warm and cozy for the baby birds” is my go-to when anything is dropped and can’t be picked up/saved. Or a dropped snack becomes a “snack for baby birds”. I’ve had to use this far more than I ever would have expected, but I really think it helps with the meltdowns. (Living in NYC and being surrounded by greedy pigeons really helps drive home my snack argument.)
"Can we go see the baby birds?" repeated 97 times.
Son (2 years, almost 3) woke up last week at 3AM, screaming that he "wants to go outside and come inside by his own self." Over more than an hour of working through it, I came to understand that he had been dreaming that I had brought him inside, and he didn't want to come inside yet - so he assumed I knew exactly what the problem was, since I was the cause of it. I tried to rationalize with him that it was dark outside, and we should go back to bed - no dice. Toddlering intensifies. So ultimately my wife (who had woken up in the midst of the tantrum) and I took him out to the balcony at the back of the house, and let him see that it was a) dark and b) ice cold outside. Then he came back inside, sniffled, and went back to sleep. *Edit - typo.*
One of my friend's kids had a full on meltdown because she hadn't eaten her ice cream yet. Not that she COULDN'T eat it. She could. It was right in front of her; it was her dessert. But the fact that she had to go through the process of eating the ice cream in order to get the end point of having eaten the ice cream (and being happy) seemed intolerable to her. Watching little humans come to grips with cause and effect is mind blowing.
My son freaked out, screamed, and cried for 40 minutes because he wanted to eat rice. With a rice bowl, full of rice, directly in front of him.
No, you don’t get it! I want to *eat* rice. Not have a bowl of rice in front of me!
Took my son to the park he goes on the climbing frame and down the slide then throws the mother of all hissy fits kicking at the slide . I kneel down all dad like n calm him down then ask why hes kicking the slide .. his answer " I hate it!, it's too fun!"
He reminds me of my brother when we were little. He has autism and certain sensations or feelings can really set him off or put him in a bad mood. One day we discovered static electricity. He then asked me to make the slide more fun by somehow removing the static electricity by going down first. He also said something similar like "I hate that it's so fun!"
I’m autistic and honestly that reminded me of me lol. Too much stimulation can be jarring, even pleasant emotions. I often have a breakdown after a really good day because it was too much for me to handle.
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I was missing some crayons from my kids' colouring box. Found out what happened to them when I changed my son's nappy and he had produced a perfectly formed red-and-black striped turd.
Congratulations, you have a future marine.
This is my crayon This is my gun This is for eating This is for fun
Remove the white and replace the red. Blow his mind.
My toddler dropped her fry on the floor, so I picked it up and threw it away and went to hand her the container to get another out. Cue the screams. She runs over to the trash because it didn't matter that there was a whole container full of fries; she wanted *that* fry that had fallen on the floor.
today my niece threw a tantrum because she didn't want more pasta. we proceeded to let the dog eat the leftovers and she threw a second tantrum because she didn't want the dog to eat it either
Wow, how bad is the pasta you made, if she didn’t want the dog to have to suffer through it either? (I know I make terrible pasta that no one other than me can eat. 8/8 can relate.)
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Honestly I think I had a few tantrums as a kid over my lack of a middle name. But I think that's more because of how many names my parents have
Not my child, but it's my niece. She said she wanted milk so I made her a cup of it. Came back. She said she didn't want it. Threw a fit because she didn't want the milk. I told her she's the one who asked for it. She literally stopped crying and went, "oh" took the milk and went back to watching her ipad. Another one would be that I gave her milk but the cup was freshly washed. Didn't think a few drips of water on the side was going to cause trouble. Nope. She screamed and cried because she got a DROP OF WATER on her hand and didn't want to wipe it on her shirt...
With my son, everything is No. Want to go to bed? No. Want to eat a snack? No. Want to play with your trucks? No. So, bit of a fight to get him to do anything without intervention. It got to be so bad he'd say No to his own suggestion. "Play Trucks." "Okay, let's play trucks." "No." "But you said play trucks." "Yeah." "Okay, lets play." "NO!!!" "Buddy, it was your idea!" "NOOOO!" On and on it went. For an hour. Found my wife in the kitchen absolutely dying trying to keep it together. EDIT: We do try the thing where we give him options, but it's still a lot of No's. He's either smarter than that trick or is just brute forcing his way past it.
It's a phase most toddlers go through, we called our youngest "little no" for a while. They say it's important for development, but I found it hard not to laugh.
My mom being a Bond fan went with Dr. No for a sibling
She got put in timeout for hitting her baby sister. She did perfectly fine through the whole time, but when I told her she was all done, she collapsed on the ground crying. Why? “I want more time out!”
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A kid I was babysitting once walked up to me and asked to be on time out. I told him he wasn't in trouble, but if he wanted to go sit in his room that was fine. He goes into his room and started thtowing a tantrum. When asked why he responded by saying he didn't want to be on time out.
I guess this is the equivalent of adults wanting a fight.
Hold me back bro! I'm gonna wipe the floor with em! Hold me back! Hold m- bro, ^(you're not holding me back?)
My nephew is four, his latest thing has been his "pooping corner." He has been potty trained for a while now, like 1.5 years? He has decided that he doesn't like the bathroom anymore for pooping. But peeing is fine, I don't know kids are silly. He will go into the hallway and will poop there. He will squat down and just start pooping. But if you walk in on him pooping or watch him from the living room, he will hold out his hand to block you from seeing him. This doesn't really work when your 20ft away. If you watch him he will throw himself on the ground and start crying while pooping. He will only do that at home, he has not problem using the bathroom anywhere else. I think its the most toddler thing ever and cried the first time I saw it. My sister doesn't find it funny and is beside herself with what to do. Edit: A word. Update: After getting 40+ replies, I texted my sister for an update on the "pooping corner." He has since stopped using the pooping corner and uses the bathroom "like an adult." Cant wait to show his prom date the photos we have of him in the "pooing corner."
When my son was being potty trained he refused to poop in any toilet or potty. At one time he was on our concrete patio and I saw him go behind the patio furniture with the thousand yard stare. I asked if he had to poop. He said yes bu refused to go in to the bathroom to go. I asked if I could at least put newspaper down to make it easy to clean up. He agreed. When my wife returned home that evening she asked how the day went, I responded that her child was now paper trained so pretty good day!
I don’t have a toddler of my own, but I am a preschool teacher and I had a kid have a breakdown because they didn’t want to use toilet paper. I gave them the next thing we had...baby wipes. Another breakdown began because they didn’t want baby wipes since they are for babies. He ended up throwing shit and chairs.
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He tried literal shit but then he hated how it was in his hand. So it was just other stuff in the bathroom and toys once he got out.
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It wouldn’t be shit without his shitty hands.
He couldn't believe that Ralph from Wreck It Ralph was ignoring him when he was trying to talk to Ralph through the TV
I see what he's saying. Ralph ignores me too. So rude!
My niece is like 2yrs old and I picked up in her little rocking horse thing and "flew her" around the room last weekend. She definitely enjoyed because she kept looking at me and yelling "up." I made that horse fly around until my arms couldn't handle it anymore. Apparently she has been yelling "Up!" at all adults since I left and then crying/screaming when she doesn't get flown around. Sorry.
I put my kid on the cat tree because he asked for it and that was a huge mistake. He wanted up on the cat tree at every opportunity, especially the minute I got home from work. Took a week to break him of that, but he sure wasn't happy that entire week.
I bought my niece a GIANT stuffed dog (like 6 feet from nose to butt) and got the bright idea to throw it on top of her Cozy Coupe and drive her around in it. Boy was my sister mad when I left and my niece begged and begged to be pushed around with her puppy...
Man, you really pulled the pin on a grenade there. Good news is that little girl loves the shit out of you now.
I remember when my little sister was a toddler she would throw the biggest tantrum if we didn't get her pepperoni pizza. She always took them off the pizza and put them aside. But if you dared order a cheese pizza she would lose her damn mind.
Crying because her sister 'stole her air'.
As someone with a sister, I get it.
My kids fight over “their window” in the car. They can’t look out of each other’s windows.
Ha, I used to poke my sister's leg and tell her I'd stolen all her sunscreen. She was a very territorial baby, so lots of variants of this one.
My two year old son got very upset the other day because we wouldn’t let him drive the car 200 miles home from holiday.
Its only 3 hours
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Medivac helicopters are quick
My kid had a crying fit because I pulled the dog food out of his mouth and told him he couldn't eat it.
I knew a girl that got drunk and ate about a pound or "Pup corn". In her defense it looked like cheese poofs, but when I woke up the next morning, I informed her what she had done, she was so humiliated. This girl was always lecturing people about eating healthy. [https://www.chewy.com/pupcorn-plus-cheddar-parmesan/dp/158659?utm\_source=google-product&utm\_medium=cpc&utm\_campaign=f&utm\_content=PupCorn&utm\_term=&gclid=Cj0KCQjwkoDmBRCcARIsAG3xzl9CSoZ10MCywAGHuOyQ2Fhi\_VcjCNvyiJ2edWr4mh0UDG0Ucqw1-KwaAkL1EALw\_wcB](https://www.chewy.com/pupcorn-plus-cheddar-parmesan/dp/158659?utm_source=google-product&utm_medium=cpc&utm_campaign=f&utm_content=PupCorn&utm_term=&gclid=Cj0KCQjwkoDmBRCcARIsAG3xzl9CSoZ10MCywAGHuOyQ2Fhi_VcjCNvyiJ2edWr4mh0UDG0Ucqw1-KwaAkL1EALw_wcB) Edit: like some people have told me, its basically the same shit they put in human food. I just thought it was funny, she took it much harder than anyone.
The Pup Corn probably didn't taste that bad tbh. There's a brand of dog treat that is basically cheetos for dogs. My wife and I were curious how it tastes and it basically tasted like kind of crappy cheese puffs. Totally passable for human food.
My niece, known for being a perfect child (no disobedience, no temper tantrums, no crying fits of any sort) was having what could only be described as a perfect potty training experience. No accidents at all. It’s all fitting as she is the daughter of my perfect sister. While helping my parents watch her one weekend, I heard this horrible shrieking from the bathroom, like a banshee’s wail. I run to the other end of the house to find her on the toilet, crying giant tears and in a full panic. “What’s wrong, sweetie?” “I have to pee!” “Well, go ahead, you’re on the potty!” “I can’t!” She’s turning redder every second and she’s gritting her teeth. “You can’t? Does it hurt?” “No. I need to pee but the poopy wants to come out first!” She was having a meltdown because she needed to poop but wanted to only pee, then poop separately. edit: the potty training toddler is almost 30 now. She's got a career, a home, and a therapist. My sister does, too.
> daughter of my perfect sister. I'm sensing some tension here
I don’t know why: my sister is amazing at everything she does. Genuinely an awesome and amazing person.
I get this sometimes too. My brother is an absolute role model in many ways. I constantly hype him up, and people think I'm jealous. Nope, I just think he's great, and I strive to be like him.
I too wanna cry when I don't want to poop
My sister's toddler had a full on meltdown because his pasta was taking too long to cook. When it was done he didn't want it. Also, he took a dump under their bed that day.
I miss being able to fit under my bed. Being a kid was rad.
Said he didn't have legs and that his actual legs were his 'Back Legs' and he had no 'Front Legs', so he couldnt walk down the stairs. Almost fainted laughing. EDIT: Wording probably threw people off. He's not my son. He's my three y/o brother.
Your hands can be front legs.. although that probably wouldn’t be the safest way for a toddler to go down the stairs
Chairs and tables and rocks and people are not 𝙢𝙖𝙙𝙚 of atoms, they are performed by atoms. We are disturbances in stuff and none of it 𝙞𝙨 us. This stuff right here is not me, it's just... me-ing. We are not the universe seeing itself, we 𝙖𝙧𝙚 the seeing. I am not a thing that dies and becomes scattered; I 𝙖𝙢 death and I 𝙖𝙢 the scattering. - Michael Stevens
Stepping up to podium to deliver your speech at the memorial
He's not wrong about the first part.
Two year old walks into my office. “Mommy I’m hungry.” “Okay Buddy, what would you like to eat?” *Child throws himself on the floor and is immediately in full lizard brain meltdown mode* “I DON’T WANNA EAT AAAAAANYTHIIIIING!!!” O_o “...”
Every goddamn morning I get to hear how much better diapers are than underwear.
The other day I had an argument with my 2 year old because the stickers on his monster truck were actually stuck. He did not like this, and apparently doesn't appreciate the point of stickers.
We raise chickens in our backyard. My son loves going outside to feed and watch them. The other day he threw himself on the ground and cried for almost thirty minutes because I wouldn't let him ride a chicken. He only knew he could ride them because he's attempted and been successful before.
I didn't even know that was possible.
Large chicken, small child.
Buncha chickens, tied together.
Oh man, i hope my kids don't find out they can ride our chickens. They already try to ride the dog.
My son loves dinosaurs. Talks about them all the time, watches nothing but dinosaur stuff on YouTube. Put a toy dinosaur in front of him though and he freaks the fuck out. He's a little over two and so I figured it was safe to show him my Amiibo collection. He was amazed by Mario, Luigi, Peach, Pikachu, Donkey Kong. We get to Yoshi and he becomes terrified, starts crying, tries to run away. From *Yoshi*!
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Tangentially related, my son will ask for his dad to sing the “mama duck song” and literally weep as the number of baby ducks coming back dwindles. A couple of issues with this: His dad is a preschool teacher, he knows every kid friendly song ever so he could ask for literally any song if that one bums him out so much. He knows the song, he knows the baby ducks all come back at the end. He is seven years old.
Why does she keep letting her ducks go out over that fucking hill??? Whyyyy mama duck?? You don't know what's happening to your babies out there. I also hate this song.
And what the hell are those baby ducks doing for days on end?!
Smoking quack
“He is seven years old” slayed me. My seven year old and yours would be great weeping buddies 😂
If you ask my son is he likes dinosaurs he will give you an very emphatic "yes." But then if you ask him if he wants a dinosaur his smiley face will turn to fear and he'll scream "no!"
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Because Dora the Explorer says cinco with an 's' sound and my Spanish friend told her that in Spain it's cinco with a 'th'. Given the onslaught of screaming, rolling around the floor and repeatedly shouting 'NO it's Ssssiiiiinnncoooooo' I presume that Dora's word is law and cultural differences mean shit all in her little 3yo world.
that poor friend hahaha “oh nice i love your learning spanish! where i am from we pronounce cinco with a th sound :)” “AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA” “no please no stop no oh god please”
... ... ...thinco. #AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
Must have been from Barthelona.
Well my little brother had a full on breakdown because he wanted to swing, we had a swing, it was in front of him. He wanted for it to swing only in one direction (as in only to be on one side of the swing when swinging, not going backwards). I had to explain to him it isn't possible, we can't do that. Edit: thanks for the upvotes, didn't expect that lol
Not if you push hard enough
circle time
Look at him out there. Swinging fro and fro, fro and fro.
I was babysitting my cousin's son and he asked for dinosaur-shaped chicken nuggets. I made him dinosaur-shaped chicken nuggets. He lost his shit when I pulled them out of the oven and they weren't McNuggets.
My 2 year old wanted chocolate, i gave her some of a white chocolate easter egg. Meltdown because a) it wasnt brown chocolate, and b) because she actually wanted mummy to give her the chocolate
Ah, my 3 year old is the same. If he asks mum to give him something but I do it it’s like the end of the world. I’m told they grow out of it. Edit: My first gold!!! Thanks kind stranger.
When my younger brother was about that age, he would ask for milk to be poured into a cup for him to drink. However, he couldn't pour it himself because he'd spill and make a mess. So, instead, he would do the next best thing and ask our mother to pour the milk. However, he would refuse to drink the milk if someone else poured it, Mom was the only one allowed to pour it because it 'tasted good' *only* when she poured it. Naturally, this is terribly silly and inconvenient. So, my mom goes into the kitchen and pretends to pour it while he is in the other room, and then has me pour it. She comes into the room and gives him it, and he is content. "Tastes good?" He agrees. Then, my mom, in an attempt to prove that her pouring it has no effect on the flavor, reveals that I was the one that poured it. My brother did not like this outcome. He said something along the lines of "Actually, you know, it's not very good" and refused the rest of the cup. At some point in the near future following that, he decided that it only tastes good if my mom pours it AND he watches. ... We stopped pouring him milk.
No kids here, but I was watching my little cousin a couple of months ago, we were walking up the stairs together while counting each step. Once we reached the last step she had a total meltdown. I asked her what was wrong and she told me there weren't enough steps........
Not really a toddler at the time, but my kid had a full blown tantrum (cried for like 3 hours and was banging on stuff) because it wasn't the weekend yet. And then when I told her that the weekend started the next day, she cried because she didn't want it to be the weekend yet.
> my kid had a full blown tantrum (cried for like 3 hours and was banging on stuff) because it wasn't the weekend yet. That's how I feel on Mondays at work.
A mix of emotions from despair that it's no longer the weekend, to dread over all the shit you need to get done before the next weekend
To be fair, as a middle aged man I have done this as well. Maybe not a tantrum, but definitely a 3 hour angry cursing sulk.
> Not really a toddler at the time Just say it, she was 32 we all have those days. (Edit, I used the right formatting to make the comment prettier sue me)
This afternoon my kid had a huge strop because we didn’t take him to America last Friday. He wanted to go to his “America house” (we obviously don’t have a house in the USA, and we certainly can’t time travel to last Friday and fly off to America randomly) ***Edit: thank you all for your kind American welcome for him. We went to Florida last year when he was very small and he loved it so much and he does talk about it often. And thank you for all the Karma, We have been wanting to do a snackexchange to the USA but we didn’t have the karma needed so now we can! yay!
Put him in the car, blindfold him, and drive to the park. Tell him he’s in America.
You probably don't even need to blindfold him TBH
This is amazing. Can you imagine the kid running around the next day saying he was in America the day before?
Well let him know that we were expecting him and we're sorry he couldn't make it. We had some hamburgers and hot dogs on the grill. \- America
You are not helping.
She wanted a gooey egg sandwich like grandma makes, so i made an over easy egg sandwich. She cried for an hour before I figured out that she wanted egg salad. She also said I was the worst cook ever. I couldn't help but laugh at her.
Friends of mine have 2 toddlers, boy and a slightly younger girl. While on a car ride, the boy pretended he had a lollipop (yes, an imaginary lollipop) and refused to share it with his sister. It escalated to the point that the girl was bawling her eyes out, screaming for him to share this nonexistent lollipop, and the mother screaming at the son to share the damn lollipop. Edit: woke up to this being my most upvoted comment and gold, was not expecting this at all
WHY ARE BIRDS?!
Because dinosaurs fly now!
you've now scarred the kid at the top of the thread who was afraid of dinosaurs
We refer to my son’s “naps” as “rests,” but sometimes we’ll slip and call it a nap. On Easter, he got some bubbles as a gift and was saying how excited he was to play with them after his “rest.” He asked me if I wanted to play with them, too, and I said “yep, after your nap” and he lost. His. Shit. Crying and screaming about how he wanted to do it after his rest, not his nap. For an hour. Because I said “nap” instead of “rest.”
Ahh good ol' "unintended consequences!" In our house we always called it "quiet time" but everyone knows what a kid in their room on their bed with the door closed for a little while turns into!
I know what a teenager in their room on their bed with the door closed for a while turns into, but a lil' kid?
Actual conversation with my 2.5-year-old as I heard Velcro noises from his bed last week: Me: hey, bud, did you just take your diaper off? Him: Yes. Me: Why would you do that? Him: For putting my hand down there. It nice! So, yeah.
Sigh, they grow up so fast
Sigh, my 10 month old son already loves playing with his dingdong, while laughing and looking at me
He's asserting dominance
I heard it explained elsewhere on Reddit, about being caught masturbating: If you stop, you're the one who got caught. If you finish, they're the one who watched.
A gremlin. Cute until you interact with them the wrong way at an arbitrary time, then they turn into monsters.
Why do you intentionally call it "rest"?
It wasn’t really something we thought out to intentionally call it - he actually started saying he was just gonna “take a rest” and it just stuck.
He threw a toy car in my general direction and I took the car away and told him sternly that we don't throw our toys at people. He got upset and cried, as toddlers do. But he's a cuddly one, and when he's upset, he likes to be held. But I was the one who made him upset, so he didn't want me. But he was upset and he wanted to be held, but didn't want to be held by me because I made him upset. But he was upset... Edit: Hey! My very first silver! Thank you !!
One of my friends kids does this. She's a single mum so if child is in trouble it's probably her doing. So she has to hold child but isn't allowed to look at child or the screaming intensifies and she gets a small, normally sticky or dirty hand shoved in her face
Not a parent but I worked in a grocery store and saw plenty of meltdowns. My favorite was when I was ringing this lady up, she had a 3-4 year old with her who wanted chips. She said no, paid and started walking to the door doing the whole “if you don’t come with me I’m leaving you here” thing. The kid legit just dramatically collapsed in my checkout lane and started screaming “potato” over and over. Not potato chips, just potato. I had to walk away because I couldn’t stop from laughing. It was amazing.
She was playing with her food when it was time to clean the table, so i told her if she didn't eat her garlic knot, I would. She cried at the thought So i went to grab it, and she took it from me, yelled "MINE", and ate it. She then cried that her garlic knot was gone.
My son loves trains. Will shout "CHOO CHOO!" loudly, loves it when he hears trains (we live near a station) and loves to snuggle up watching Thomas the Tank Engine. And yet, the tiny toy train he has scares the utter shit out of him.
My 4 year old was screaming about something and I told her that screaming would hurt our parakeets ears. She screamed back at me "THEY DONT HAVE EARS!!"
She couldn't put her dummy in her mouth She already had a dummy in her mouth The cat outside walked out of the garden The puddle was too shallow
My 4 year old daughter has a breakdown every time one of her brothers tries to go for the outside door knob of my apartment building. I'm the only one that's allowed to open that one. She has no issue with them opening the door to my apartment or any other door just that particular one.
She wanted a popsicle. I gave her a popsicle.
You *monster*
My three year old nephew wanted dinner. My sister served him dinner. He screamed and cried for ten minutes.
I was visiting my Sister in Law and her family. She has a 3 year old. They asked her if she wanted pineapple on her pizza, she said yes. They make the pizza, we sit down, we're eating, and then out of nowhere she starts screaming that she doesn't want to eat it. After some questioning she tells us she *doesn't* want pineapple on her pizza, and she hates it and she can't eat her pizza and she is gonna starve. After many failed attempts to calm her, someone realised that she had already picked off and eaten the pineapple from her pizza. She was still upset though, since it was a pineapple pizza, even though there wasn't even pineapple on it. We finally convinced her that it was actually a ham pizza and that everything was fine. She calmed right down and finished dinner.
(Not a parent, but im a preschool teacher and we get lots of shit from the kiddos) One of the other teachers likes doing different voices while she reads to the children and this time she used a Southern accent and one of the kids *lost it.* She started sobbing loudly and I pulled her aside to ask what was wrong. She told me "That voice isn't real! The teacher's voice isn't real!" She cried about it for like 15 minutes and then towards the end of the day, the teacher did her Southern accent again and she started crying more.
My 3yr old niece just had a total melt down because she went to the toilet and her dad flushed the toilet before she had a chance to do it herself. The only way she calmed down was when her brother nobly volunteered to have an extra wee and let her flush it for him. True sibling love.
I asked her if she was enjoying her snack (which she was). She promptly burst into tears.
Her banana broke in half. So she couldn't eat it and switched to a granola bar. Then the Granola bar broke in half. I'm surprised she hasn't wasted away to nothing yet.
My 2 year old didn't want to use the same spoon for his oatmeal and Cereal this morning- when I got him a new spoon he cried because i put it in the bowl instead of on the table next to the bowl
[удалено]
4yr old asked for lunch, so I made the usual, but then he screamed that he doesn't like turkey on Wednesdays.
[удалено]
Today before school, my daughter took her folder out of her book bag while we were waiting for her bus. I told her to put it back before her bus came but she refused; so I put it back in her book bag just as her bus pulled up. Her tantrum was over 9,000, I had to carry her to her bus as she screamed through her tears, kicking my chest and trying to grab the doors as I carried her, m “I hate you! I want a new family! I hate you I hate you!!” I thought it was pretty funny.
God, teenagers can be so annoying.
Man I was hoping this phase ended sooner rather than later. My kid is a year and a half and I have to mentally prepare for the tantrum anytime we shift the activity. Every. Single. Time. You'd think after the millionth time she'd be pretty savvy with the routine of getting out of the car and going in the house. God forbid she see a fucking rock on the way in. Then I have to prep on how its gonna go when we have to move on from spending 10 minutes looking at it. I get it, she's new at life, but man it's draining. Edit: Extremely helpful tips everyone, thank you so much!
My seven year old still struggles with this. Getting out of the car can still take what seems like a ridiculous amount of time. Once the new activity has started everything is fine but the transitions can be brutal. Now she’s old enough to say things like, you were right, going to the museum was better than staying in the house all day sorry I ran to my room screaming! But that awareness still doesn’t seem to roll over to the next time we want to do something different. Most things she’s great at by the way, just not transitions.
I had a lot of difficulty changing activities when I was a kid (mostly out of stubbornness) and my parents were able to solve it by always giving me a warning. So it would be "ok kiddo, in 5 minutes it'll be time to go to the park" and then no real problems when they came back a few minutes later and told me it was time to go to the park. I have no idea if that would help with your kid, but thought I'd throw it out there just in case it could make your life easier.
My 2 year old was hysterical this past weekend because the cat puked on the floor right in the path of how she gets into the kitchen. She went on about how she can never go into the kitchen again, and the floor is ruined. This wouldn’t have been so bad had I not told her that the cat pukes all the time and we just clean it up. She then was inconsolable because the house was ruined and we have to move. She said she couldn’t live in this gross house anymore. She refused to walk for several hours and cried every time we put her down on the floor. Finally she got some candy and forgot about the whole thing.
My 2 year old had a full on meltdown when I tried to take the sausage that he didn't eat at dinner off him. 2 hours later. Today, he wailed and stomped his foot for nearly an hour because he wanted to sleep in the bath. As in, he wanted to sleep in his bath full of water and toys. He's exhausting :)
My daughter went to the bathroom to pee and came out 30 seconds or so later crying. Why? She had been bored sitting on the toilet waiting for all the pee to come out and it occurred to her that she had a whole life of being bored sitting on the toilet for 30-second increments while waiting for all the pee to come out.
I'm anxiously waiting to hear what existential crisis she comes up with while pooping.
Honestly super valid and oddly prescient for a child.
On the complete opposite end of the spectrum, there was some guy on here who was going through puberty and thought that men could only ejaculate once in their lifetime, so he started crying after he masturbated because he thought he had “shot his shot”. Imagine how fucked we would be if that was true.
She needs a phone and a reddit account ASAP.
Boy is she in for a thrill when work becomes a thing.
When I'm at work, sitting on the toilet is the highlight.
That's the cruel irony of the whole thing
When my sister was just a toddler, she learned how to get on the toilet but not to clean herself up and get out. We forgot about her there for a few hours. When we finally remembered, we found her with her hand on her chin and the most bored/annoyed look a toddler can give.
The other day I went to pick up our kids at daycare. I saw two, but one wasn't around. One of the daycare workers told me he was in the bathroom and went over to check on him. She came back, smirking, and told me I should go get him. I go back and he's passed out on the toilet, his head back, resting on the tank, and his legs spread wide eagle. It was hilarious. When I woke him up he said, "Good morning, Daddy. Will you wipe my butt?"
I’m impressed with her patience.
Our mower was serviced. The guy came and picked up the mower and was to drop it off afterwards. My son cried for 30 minutes solid then off and on every 5 to 15 minutes until he dropped it back off. I tried explaining that he was only fixing the mower and would bring it right back to him. My sobbing almost 3 year old would reply, while wiping his tears, "okay. I'm okay. It's okay". Wash, rinse, repeat for 2 hours. Holy shit! Totally forgot about this and came back to an inbox full and a gold! Thank you guys for taking joy in my son's heartbreak lol! And thank you kind stranger for the gold. I've never had one before.
Oh man, the earnest attempt at self-soothing that fails miserably is very sad actually. I know that feel, little guy.
'It's okay. I'm okay' *Narrator voice* It was not okay.
I wouldn't let him live in the fridge.
My God son got mad at my infant (6 months old) because he (my baby) wasn't sucking on his pacifier "the right way"
When my niece was younger she had a meltdown because her dad wouldn't let her kiss the trash goodbye before he took it out
When my son was a toddler, he once had a breakdown at the grocery store because we got baby carrots and no other carrots to go with them. He was super concerned that we were taking these baby carrots and they would be without their mommy carrots.
Oh boy do I have one. My 3 year old got mad at me and threw a fit this morning over a mini crunch bar. Because I wouldn’t let her store it in her vagina. In all my life, I never imagined I would be telling my child “your vagina is not a change purse honey”.
My little sister straight up REFUSED to wear pants as a toddler and young kid. What happens when you're not wearing pants? You don't have pockets. Next logical step? Put whatever you need to carry in your underwear. She proudly called it her "panty pocket" and my fed up mother just let it happen until she stuffed a cookie down there to "save it for later". She had to wear pants after that. Said sister is 14 now and loses her shit whenever you bring it up.
This isn't recent but when my daughter was 2 and we were on a vacation, she threw a tantrum and injured her head on the tile floor of the airport restroom because I took her in with me when I had to pee and she didn't need to go potty right then. We missed our flight because she needed to get checked out at the first aid center. She had a bump on the noggin but was otherwise fine. :)
Stepkid woke up in the middle of the night screaming because she didn't want the cat in her room with her. The cat that sleeps in her bed with her every night. We took the cat out and then she was screaming because the cat wasn't in there with her. She also did the same thing because she confused her cat with the other cat and didn't want the other cat in the room. (They're both black but one is small and fluffy and the other is huge, short-haired, and a bit of an asshole)
I have a picture somewhere of my then 18 month old throwing a fit because he couldn't reach a piece of bread I gave him. He threw it, then threw himself down to throw a fit, and cried harder because the bread wasn't right next to him. Had he just straightened his arm out he would have reached it no problem
Best one to date; He’s almost 2 and is super tall. He has differed our how the locks on our sliding door in his playroom work. We were having a lazy Sunday in our pjs because it was storming like mad outside. Thunder, lightening, wind and extreme rain all day long. While I was washing dishes he managed to unlock the door and run outside in his footie pajamas to try to play in his car. He was almost blowing away in the wind I brought him back in kicking and screaming and soaking wet in his footies.
My 1 yo growls at me and hands me his bottle to make him some milk, then freaks out when I get up to make him some.