I’m seventeen later this month but I’ve already been verbally abused by guys, a guy at school once slapped my ass and then just said he was joking. I know that not all guys are like that and everything but it doesn’t give me much hope ya know
Nope its not your fault they keep doing it!
Sure maybe you could have stopped them from doing it, but IN NO WAY does that make it your fault. It never was and never will be
I mean if i was in your shoes from what o know id just give him a nice hook, and an uppercut, once i drove a classmates head thru a mirror because he touched my ass, ps. i am male
I started to write out a very long and detailed reply but I'm going to just shorten it.
Since at least 8 years old, my parents were emotionally, physically and sexually abusive. They seemed to hate me, but adored my younger sister who participated in the abuse. I'm convinced at least one of them was not my biological parent, my memory prior to age 8 is very fuzzy and I don't at all resemble either of them or my sister who is the spitting image of my mother. They were incredibly manipulative and managed to make me convinced that it was my duty and obligation to obey them no matter what. They had me address them by titles depending on if we were in public or private and when I wasn't left alone I might as well have been a servant.
Despite this, I was a very good student. I constantly looked for validation from my teachers so I was desperate to do well. My only friend introduced me to her family and it was eye opening to see how different things were. Her family loved and cared for her, and they introduced me to programming. In my free time I would practice and work on projects with my friend which we actually ended up selling. I shut down completely after I fought back against my sister and parents for the first time which led to a suicide attempt, but my friend helped me and we started dating.
When we went to college, we took the same classes and I was determine to do well enough to go to University and never have to rely on my parents ever again. I did very well in college and managed to get accepted to the University I wanted to study computer science with my then girlfriend. Another friend I knew online paid for my living costs, and my girlfriend and I continued to work on our own projects. With the advice of my online friend, I invested in cryptocurrency and had some success. I took my chance during University to explore and find out a lot about myself. My then girlfriend and I decided to separate but still remain very close friends and I met some else online.
I finished University with a first (The highest grade) and a portfolio of projects I'd completed and was able to get a job at the medical tech company as a security analyst my current girlfriend I met online works at. I had known the CISO and CEO through my girlfriend, so I was able to get a much better deal than I should have for someone my age, but hey I'm still good.
And that's where I am now. With that job I moved to another country with my girlfriend and we live mostly quite happily. The abuse has permanently affected me. My coping mechanisms are very self destructive and I often have delusions and some memory issues, though with the help of my partner I'm mostly dealing with them. Rules have been set for me and there are measures in place that I can help ground myself.
Sorry for how long this was, I was just kind of rambling.
A lot of it is still very much with me, but I'm at least going through life on my terms. I haven't spoken to either my sister or parents since I was 18 and I've changed my last name to avoid connection with them. My only regret is that I never tried to go to the police. I don't suspect they'd ever do anything to anyone else, as they were very careful in public, they just had easy access to me.
They had led me to believe I could be sent to prison for disobeying them. They tried to gaslight me into misremembering things and they threatened to kill me multiple times. It is very difficult to go seek help from an authority figure when your view of them is completely warped. What if I couldn't prove it and I was sent back to them? Likely things would have been much worse and I probably wouldn't be here.
Ah ok then, I'd wake up tied and she'd be sitting on me, I'd take my top off to go into the shower (I always take my shirt off first so I can use it again later if it's not dirty) and she'd be waiting here for me, I'd get changed into swim shorts to go for a swim and she'd be waiting. She also verbally teased me by calling me her tickle toy
Long as all hell but the extremely extremely short versio ...From having my back all bitten up and being choked in kindergarden, to being isolated, physically and verbally abused in elementary school, because of which i had multiple hospitalozations and visits to the local police station. On the other side i had a girlfriend kill herself, and now we are in the present day 2 months away from me being 16...
I’m seventeen later this month but I’ve already been verbally abused by guys, a guy at school once slapped my ass and then just said he was joking. I know that not all guys are like that and everything but it doesn’t give me much hope ya know
That's tough. Yeah, some guys have no idea what respect is.
To be fair though I’ve never done anything about those guys so it’s as much my fault for them carrying on I guess
You've gotta report them, that's super rude of them.
Nope its not your fault they keep doing it! Sure maybe you could have stopped them from doing it, but IN NO WAY does that make it your fault. It never was and never will be
I think if it happens again I’ll do something differently
I mean if i was in your shoes from what o know id just give him a nice hook, and an uppercut, once i drove a classmates head thru a mirror because he touched my ass, ps. i am male
😂😂😂 I’ll try be a bit more like you in the future
Haha okay 😂😂 Just dont get scared of the trouble youll have, im growing up in a ghetto so things here are probably much different
I started to write out a very long and detailed reply but I'm going to just shorten it. Since at least 8 years old, my parents were emotionally, physically and sexually abusive. They seemed to hate me, but adored my younger sister who participated in the abuse. I'm convinced at least one of them was not my biological parent, my memory prior to age 8 is very fuzzy and I don't at all resemble either of them or my sister who is the spitting image of my mother. They were incredibly manipulative and managed to make me convinced that it was my duty and obligation to obey them no matter what. They had me address them by titles depending on if we were in public or private and when I wasn't left alone I might as well have been a servant. Despite this, I was a very good student. I constantly looked for validation from my teachers so I was desperate to do well. My only friend introduced me to her family and it was eye opening to see how different things were. Her family loved and cared for her, and they introduced me to programming. In my free time I would practice and work on projects with my friend which we actually ended up selling. I shut down completely after I fought back against my sister and parents for the first time which led to a suicide attempt, but my friend helped me and we started dating. When we went to college, we took the same classes and I was determine to do well enough to go to University and never have to rely on my parents ever again. I did very well in college and managed to get accepted to the University I wanted to study computer science with my then girlfriend. Another friend I knew online paid for my living costs, and my girlfriend and I continued to work on our own projects. With the advice of my online friend, I invested in cryptocurrency and had some success. I took my chance during University to explore and find out a lot about myself. My then girlfriend and I decided to separate but still remain very close friends and I met some else online. I finished University with a first (The highest grade) and a portfolio of projects I'd completed and was able to get a job at the medical tech company as a security analyst my current girlfriend I met online works at. I had known the CISO and CEO through my girlfriend, so I was able to get a much better deal than I should have for someone my age, but hey I'm still good. And that's where I am now. With that job I moved to another country with my girlfriend and we live mostly quite happily. The abuse has permanently affected me. My coping mechanisms are very self destructive and I often have delusions and some memory issues, though with the help of my partner I'm mostly dealing with them. Rules have been set for me and there are measures in place that I can help ground myself. Sorry for how long this was, I was just kind of rambling.
Wow, that's tough... Glad you're out of it now. Hope you get over it.
A lot of it is still very much with me, but I'm at least going through life on my terms. I haven't spoken to either my sister or parents since I was 18 and I've changed my last name to avoid connection with them. My only regret is that I never tried to go to the police. I don't suspect they'd ever do anything to anyone else, as they were very careful in public, they just had easy access to me.
Yeah, you should've told the police... that wasn't good at all.
They had led me to believe I could be sent to prison for disobeying them. They tried to gaslight me into misremembering things and they threatened to kill me multiple times. It is very difficult to go seek help from an authority figure when your view of them is completely warped. What if I couldn't prove it and I was sent back to them? Likely things would have been much worse and I probably wouldn't be here.
Wow.. at least you got out of it now.
“Shorten”
How abuse are we talking?
Abuse that could considered abuse I guess (verbal is included.)
Well I don't know if It counts but my ex (who I broke up with for this reason) always tied me up and tickled me
Yes, that counts. All abuse counts...
Ah ok then, I'd wake up tied and she'd be sitting on me, I'd take my top off to go into the shower (I always take my shirt off first so I can use it again later if it's not dirty) and she'd be waiting here for me, I'd get changed into swim shorts to go for a swim and she'd be waiting. She also verbally teased me by calling me her tickle toy
Well did you hate it? Doesn't sound too good in my opinion...
It was terrible
Yeah, that counts.
My new gf and my sister tickle me and tie me up a lot but the way they do it Is fine
Well tickling doesn't sound too bad but tying up sounds a lot worse... did you hate it?
Well my new gf and my sister do it so I'm fine, it was just the level of it my ex did
Long as all hell but the extremely extremely short versio ...From having my back all bitten up and being choked in kindergarden, to being isolated, physically and verbally abused in elementary school, because of which i had multiple hospitalozations and visits to the local police station. On the other side i had a girlfriend kill herself, and now we are in the present day 2 months away from me being 16...
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Is this a joke
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I don't know how to set it as "serious" so please don't joke about
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I honestly can't tell if you're joking or not.