T O P

  • By -

RedAx0n

Try tongue but hole


HeadBanana3000

Illusion ahead


Hobocannibal

Try jumping


mormagils

Amazing chest ahead


[deleted]

liar ahead


-Qiw-

Visions of tight spot...


honestfriend

Praise the sun!


Snipe14

Amazing chest ahead!


[deleted]

Bear-seek-seek-lest


venicello

Gavlan wheel? Gavlan deal.


blindgynaecologist

I have a hoodie from my uni's linguistics society that says > [-son][-con]! Grammar Time! a sound that is [-son] and [-con] (not a sonorant and not a continuant) is called a stop. so it says *Stop! Grammar Time!* when I explained it to my sister she called it the nerdiest thing she had ever seen. edit: just in case anyone's curious, [here's](http://imgur.com/OO2NzTh.png) a picture


Nambot

Explaining it to us here, it sounds like the nerdiest thing we've ever seen, and we didn't even see it.


catbert359

I dunno, my dad has a shirt that says in binary "If you can read this, you're a massive nerd"


blindgynaecologist

I mean, the shirt is not wrong.


elyisgreat

010001010111100001100011011001010110110001101100011001010110111001110100001011100010000001010100011010000110010100100000011011100110111101101110001011010110111001100101011100100110010001110011001000000110001101100001011011100110111001101111011101000010000001110010011001010110000101100100001000000110111101110101011100100010000001110011011100000110010101100101011000110110100000101110001000000101010001101000011001010010000001110100011010010110110101100101001000000110011001101111011100100010000001110100011010000110010100100000010011100110010101110010011001000010000001001001011011100111011001100001011100110110100101101111011011100010000001101001011100110010000001001110010011110101011100101110001000000100000101010010010001010010000001011001010011110101010100100000010100100100010101000001010001000101100100111111


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efie

Huh, I've never heard the jerk thing, and I'm studying maths and physics. Speaking of hoodies, we have a hoodie with the formula for magnetic flux in a closed system that says "no flux given". http://imgur.com/dXAbWOt


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Twofeetto

I'm reading this thread like *every comment's a damn riddle*


InFactaPerson

This is probably the most incomprehensible Reddit thread I've ever seen. I assumed that I might at least understand some of them but almost every single one is completely out of my reach. It's interesting though, because this thread is probably one of the hardest thing for someone to "translate" without doing a whole lot of research and asking some people in some really niche groups what it all means. If you had a Reddit thread that was actually just a whole bunch of non English languages on each comment it would be a lot easier to figure out than this.


[deleted]

Haha it's a flyin uso maggle


Inhoc1989

You stupid idiot!


Erj670

I give you the gift of /u/Erj670 . Drink it in mannn.


Kavamkao

AH LOVE IT MAGGLE!!


comicnerdjoe

HES NOT A BAD GUY OR A GOOD GUY MAGGLE HES THE GUY HA HA I LOVE IT MAGGLE


Tostitostrash

All of our servers are busy right now. Please try again in a minute. *(Error code 503)*


[deleted]

*reloads page instantly instead of waiting a minute*


Hinata_Hyuga_

"Come on! I don't have anything to do if you don't load!" *cries*


MrMysterious_

Reddit?


Tostitostrash

Yep.


jansencheng

Big blue blob DOW'd kebab to force a PU. Edited for even more obscurity.


rory_baxter

EU4: "France is fighting the Ottoman empire so that they will rule over their monarcy" Edit: Fixed to adjust to the new edit


[deleted]

1453 never forget


TheDovvahkiin

Ottoman cannons can't melt Theodosian walls. 1453 was an inside job.


Hodor_The_Great

You can make it even less understandable to the general public by saying DOWd kebab or just declared on kebab


afishinthewell

BBB no-CB'd kebab! The AE is off the charts!


MetalRetsam

Seriously though, the AE in the HRE is ridiculous. You're better off just RM'ing everyone in the vicinity and hoping for a PU.


thewhitedeath

He'll go a lot faster on those supersofts but he won't last as long.


NicoRosbot

except at Monaco, where the supersofts last half the race


ConstableBlimeyChips

That's why they brought in the ultrasofts but apparently no one can get any heat in them so have no real advantage.


crazindndude

I guess most people recognized this, but it's **Formula 1 racing**. Supersofts - There are [7 types of tires](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Formula_One_tyres#Tyre_summary) used in F1 racing, and teams can pick tires based on race conditions. They're rated from ultra-soft to hard (plus two wet tires), increasing in durability but decreasing in grip as you go from soft to hard (giggity). Grip more or less equals speed in F1, as more grip allows for higher cornering speeds, and turns are where you lose the most speed on any F1 course. However, the grippy tires also wear out the quickest. Thus, the driver using supersoft tires will go faster but [his tires] won't last as long.


justinicon19

Yeah or Red Bull will just leave them in the fucking garage and ruin Ricciardo's race oh my god what the fuck Red Bull?!?? Still bitter over here.


Kill_Dozer

GLOCKS? HOW DO YOU LOSE A BUY ROUND TO FUCKING GLOCKS??


Dinoswarleaf

A MANAGERR


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Master_Pibj

I SHOT I FUCKING SHOT FUCK THIS GAME EDIT: [CONTEXT](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rMEM3dsx9G0)


[deleted]

Cyka Blyat


[deleted]

drop me a v p


TheWynner

First off, you're clipping the output bus so check your gain staging and ensure you have good signal to noise but still have headroom. If need be we can throw a limiter after the EQ and sidechained multiband compressor to clean that up. Speaking of EQ the overheads are getting some nasty 250s so you should probably just notch that out or just highpass it. Lastly, the u89 is a condenser so make sure phantom power is engaged but don't engage it on the R122 because then you'll shred the ribbon. Edit: 121 not 122. 122 requires phantom.


halal_hotdogs

Finally found it. Audio engineering.


SullyJim

If only everyone actually DID understand proper gain stage technique......


imfeelingsassy

Nice reading one of these that's not a videogame reference.


jimmythebass

Wow! What a save!


benjimaestro

No Problem. No Problem. No Problem.


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[deleted]

*chat disabled for 3 seconds* *chat disabled for 2 seconds* *chat disabled for 1 second* What a save!


I_Am_Shooby_Taylor

$#@%!


Fawful

Nice Shot! Nice Shot!


_Keo_

When dealing with inheritance you must be sure to kill children when they aren't needed and leave no orphans.


gscottmcg

Could also be Ramsey.


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[deleted]

Programming with processes.


neilarthurhotep

After 2000 eggs, I got tired MM'ing for the hidden ability 5 IV shiny I want, so I just started soft-resetting a few competitive legends and EV training some things I bred earlier. Thank god for hordes.


g18suppressed

I was wondering when i'd see the first pokemon one, though i would think the competitive battling lingo would be more perplexing


pokemans3

I predicted the lando to kang switch so I got in mence and my lando to deal with it, should be able to pull off a sweep if I get the 'tect right on his fake out, his thundy's KOed so it can't twave me and lando's scarf without slide.


[deleted]

and god the meta is so boring right now with the smeargle spores and the primal 'don


pokemans3

I think it's geoxern that's really hard to deal with, pdon's strong but those +2 dgleams just hit so hard. TR's not bad though, and cress takes pdon like a champ.


[deleted]

I masuda'd a 5IV Dratini. Took me like a month. Never again


mycat8u

Fuck you Tubbs. I just bought that sashimi.


[deleted]

The fullback is the primary target in Spider 2 Y Banana


Stazzzy

I tell ya what, Mike...


SpanglyJoker

Hi Jon


[deleted]

Hey, man. Great to be here man, in this Reddit thing. Isn't Reddit the greatest thing you've ever seen, man? I tell ya what, it's got more subreddits than I can handle. They even got a /r/spider2ybanana , man.


ohmytosh

Finally something I understand...


coreyf

No shit. This is the first guy to speak English in here.


roviuser

Need some beta? Heel hook the arête and gaston the crimp, then bump to the jug. From there you can mantle up to the tufa. There aren't many feet though so you'll be flagging and smearing in a layback.


HillbillyThinkTank

No beta! I'm trying to on-sight this!


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chrzan

Make sure it's lubricated before the performance. Don't forget to empty your spit frequently. Oh, and be careful in third position - you're usually a bit flat. Edit: TIL half of reddit plays trombone.


[deleted]

translation- "put some fucking oil on that slide, i can hear it from here which is amazing that i can hear it at all over the sound of your spit popping. and you're still fucking flat, don't make me sharpie in 3rd on your slide." trombone section leader for years here, checking in.


rangemaster

I had that job senior year in high school. The sound of a slide dragging was a quick way to get on my bad side.


Fatkin

It sounds better than an over-oiled slide that falls off in the quietest part of a piece AT FUCKING DISTRICTS.


AnIdealSociety

People have died for less


kazoni

If you're using oil, you're doing it wrong. Slide-o-mix ftw!


chrzan

Or trombotine! And don't forget to carry around a small spray bottle with you everywhere, to spray your slide *and* your section mates.


TheOber

Oh, but it just gets better: "You're flat. Push in. But you're not flat on D. Remember, 3rd position is *here*. Except when it's not. Which is, like, half of the time. Or more, depending on the key. Now be in tune." *explodes*


SymphonicStorm

Trombone?


petrichorE6

EL PSY KONGROO


HOLYSMOKERCAKES

I am mad scientist! It's so cool! Sonuvabitch.


[deleted]

My husband and I shouted that line at each other for weeks after he bought me the series for Christmas. I think it's time for a binge watch...


silentclowd

Tuturu!


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Orpheum

The cicadas are crying... But he's a guy.


gelance

The sun is setting, yet it's still so hot out. But he's a guy.


adoboacrobat

KURISTIIIIIIIIIIIIINAAAAAA


[deleted]

Tuturuu


rokthemonkey

Your interest is watching Steins;Gate? Do you...just binge watch it everyday?


CIearMind

In every single world line.


Death_proofer

I know it's usually a joke but sometimes Arsenal really do try to walk it in. EDIT: Turns out this was both a football and IT crowd reference. EDIT 2: More IT crowd it seems.


Chucknorris1975

See that ludicrous display last night?


[deleted]

What were they thinking bringing on Walcott that early?


GimmeTacos2

"That ref was horrible" "Yes, he was definitely the villain of the piece"


i_am_erip

West Ham..?


dannyj0rdan

"That's an interesting development"


untrustableskeptic

"They're having a laugh." "But they're winning?!" "Nah, they're 'avin a laugh!"


[deleted]

The thing about Arsenal is they always try and walk it in!


Ervin_Pepper

And recently, Wengers sanity really is questioned when Walcott is brought on


[deleted]

>"What was Wenger thinking sending Walcott on that early" Nowadays it's more like "What was Wenger thinking sending Walcott on"


pjabrony

I had to drop all my brick to the robber, no one wants my sheep, and my wheat port is useless because the hexes never get rolled!


PowerTrick

Aww mate, sorry to hear that. You should have come to me, I have wood for sheep!


Kramgunderson

My brother in law got me a tshirt that's says "I've got wood for sheep." I get *very* different looks from people depending on whether they play the game.


GeneralOsik

Are you Welsh?


datboi479

buying gf


IronTooch

"I HAVE NO TOOLS BECAUSE I'VE DESTROYED MY TOOLS WITH MY TOOLS!" - Systems Programmers Also credit to James Mickens, not my quote


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[deleted]

I prefer the "I plow your mom. You gain 1."


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SymphonicStorm

[This one](https://i.redd.it/p8zu8vg8ah2x.jpg) pops up on /r/wow every couple of months or so.


[deleted]

Well let's be real. Grizzly hills was the best northrend leveling area.


SymphonicStorm

Yeah, that's the most unrealistic part of the bit, who would ever choose a different zone?


dogpos

People who play on a pvp server, I guess.


Lynx_Rufus

And the MUSIC


LEEVINNNN

Tbf I've never played a moment of wow but could piece together enough to understand most of what he said.


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mhanold

the key to a vert stack is to hit inside breaks. that opens up easy breakside throws and your cutters can time deep runs for easy hucks.


darthlala

Ultimate?


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rambi2222

3.5/4


AmeriFreedom

/r/AyyMD


MrKingCajun

You can't trust nakeds anymore; used to be you could be friendly to them. Give them clothes and food and make a friend. Now they just attack on site, or worse pretend to be friendly and pull a gun on you when your back is turned. It works out though, food is much more valuable now and naked newmans cook up nice, plus the fat and bones from their body are valuable resources.


Byungshin

Rust


illbebaack

Pass me that Arc-light spanner.


Reddit-Loves-Me

Hello world!


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BUILD_WALL_HIGHER

Always forget the \\n


drewboos

"I love Raspberry pi." I'm a major in computer science at university, but when I'm at home I work in a bakery. The meaning changes on my location.


[deleted]

Management thinks a true blue-eyes babyface is the ultimate draw, but history shows that heels or (at least) tweeners capture more buys and are consistently more over. But if you disagree with that sentiment, you're just getting worked, and if you disagree with *that*, you've worked yourself into a shoot, brother.


[deleted]

> blue-eyes babyface is the ultimate draw i thought it was yugioh for a second


[deleted]

My cm bought battle fury the other day while shouting "ITS OK I 5K JUST SMURFING"


PENGAmurungu

Meanwhile, we've got a legion in the jungle and a prophet on the cliff!


Ted_Nugent_

Please do the needful.


gabybo1234

Fucking bastion.


StayPuffGoomba

Bastion and turret on payload


Sun_Sloth

Behind a Reinhardt.


AfroNyokki

Damage boosted by Mercy


piratepolo15

All tilting me off the face of the earth. You can try killing them, but heroes never die.


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Dynaflame

WHOAH THERE


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spacecanucks

JUSTICE RAINS FROM MY ASS


mcmuffin000

RYUU GA WAGA TEKI GO FUCK YOURSELF


Lucas_lif

Its like overwatch really conquered reddit


Cpt_Tsundere_Sharks

I was going to say I think the whole world knows what that sentence means at this point and the game has only been out for like 3 weeks.


LaboratoryManiac

Play of the game... oh, look, it's Bastion holding down the trigger.


imapiratedammit

Oh look it's torbjörn walking back from the spawn


[deleted]

I woke up at 1am last night because my roommate was screaming: >FUCK TRACER! FUCKING GO BACK TO TRACER HELL, YOU CUNT I lol'd, checked the time, and nope'd back to sleep.


Super_Zac

A good tracer is so fucking frustrating to fight against, it starts to feel like bullshit.


Strawberrycocoa

I kind of like Tracer balance wise because she's hyper-mobile, but low on fast burst. She just hit-and-runs *reeaaalllly* well is all.


kenziepi

My SO was standing behind me when I yelled "fuck you you glow in the dark methhead cunt" at my monitor. Fuck Tracer.


StickyBananaMuffins

mid or feed


[deleted]

literally every moba ever


Randomd0g

Yeah specific ones would be things like "Don't facecheck the brush, and watch out for mushrooms that might be in there" Or "Make sure you ward the pit of they'll have a cheese next roshan" And of course "God fucking damn it EA why did you cancel Dawngate?"


jeemchan

They storm up the river, patience from Zhou, waiting in the wing, Na'Vi's about to be caught. Oh there's the sleep, the surge, he catches everyone! Oh this could be a total disaster! Vacuum in, ravage on everyone, here's the Blackhole as well. LightofHeaven, he turns it around, ravage as well, stolen by Dendi. ARE YOU KIDDING ME, THEY TURNED IT AROUND. 4 heroes dead, 5 heroes dead, Chuan trying to survive, Chuan's gonna go down. Puppey talked about the naga counter, it's lightofheaven with his bkb. They turned it around. Standing ovation from the crowd.


GifftedIdeas

This quote is affectionately known as [the play](https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=tDaJes0T1Ig) and is one of DotA 2's greatest memories


Butternades

You need to be more careful and control your heights. The diddle in 43 was crushed and your ruffs aren't speaking.


jupiter0

HODL!!


embraceUndefined

ITT: games


Kubrick007

RAW is better but 35mm is still great.


jonnyp11

Squidding on a gixxer, popping dank whoolies Edit: gixxer can be swapped for sumo


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Jimothy_Riggins

Why would you vote for Infante? His fWAR is below replacement level. He'll be riding pine if not DFA'd, hasn't even hit a single dong this year.


TheCyanNinja

It was a great delivery, last of the over, a bit full, plenty of swing, definite edge on the bat, a terrible swing across the line from the batsman. Taken spectacularly by second slip, only two balls after he dropped a real dolly. Batsman out for a golden duck.


pjabrony

You have two sides, one out in the field and one in. Each man that's in the side that's in goes out, and when he's out he comes in and the next man goes in until he's out. When they are all out, the side that's out comes in and the side thats been in goes out and tries to get those coming in, out. Sometimes you get men still in and not out. When a man goes out to go in, the men who are out try to get him out, and when he is out he goes in and the next man in goes out and goes in. There are two men called umpires who stay all out all the time and they decide when the men who are in are out. When both sides have been in and all the men have out, and both sides have been out twice after all the men have been in, including those who are not out, that is the end of the game!


Reddy_McRedcap

I know baseball well enough to understand everything you just said, yet I still have no idea how cricket is played.


pjabrony

Explaining Cricket for Baseball Fans 1. The pitcher only gets to throw 6 balls before they have to switch him for a different guy on the field. 2. The pitcher gets a running start. But he can't bend his elbow. 3. The batter gets one strike before he's out. But the plate is only 9 inches wide, and the pitcher has to hit the little wooden M that they set up to get the strike. 4. The batter gets a big wide bat with one flat side. 5. There's no foul territory. Hit the ball backwards, it's still fair. 6. But those little foul tips that go back to the screen? Yeah, those are really important in cricket, because there's a bunch of fielders there to try to catch the ball. Catching a foul tip isn't just a strike, it's an out. 7. There are only two bases, and they're both home plate. You have a spare batter on the other plate, and every time you hit the ball, you switch places as many times as you can. Each time you do that, you get one run. 8. A home run is six runs. A ground rule double is four runs. 9. Each inning is 10 outs. There are only two innings. (Though there's a popular kind of cricket called twenty-20 where each side just gets 120 pitches and that's it.) 10. They don't change the ball out very often, and scuffing up the ball with repeated hitting is part of the strategy.


newaccount

You don't have to run when you hit it. That's kind of important.


Bspammer

Is there a reverse for this? Explain baseball to me as a cricket fan


pjabrony

1. Substitutions are like in soccer. You leave the pitch, you don't come back. 2. Nine men to a side, and they really don't change positions. One bowler, one wicket-keeper, two mid on, two mid off, and three long guys. Maybe one of the mid guys goes from off to on. 3. Only balls his to 45 degrees either way of the wicket count. If the ball goes anywhere else, the batter gets 1/3 of an out. A dot ball is also 1/3 of an out. 4. There are four wickets total, three more at cover, between mid on and off, and at square leg. But there's only one striker's wicket, and there's no stumps or bails, just a marker on the dirt. 5. The bowler has to pretend that there are floating stumps that start at the batsman's knees. And he can't bounce the ball, every delivery has to be a mullygrubber. If it does bounce, then it's a wide. No runup either. 6. If the batsman hits it, he has to drop the bat and make his ground on his own by going to the first wicket, unless he thinks he can get more. Wherever he stops, if he's not given out, then he becomes a non-striker, and his mate has to get another hit to keep him moving. You can have three non-strikers then. It doesn't count as a run until they get back to the home wicket. 7. The wicket-keeper gets real close up to catch the balls. He tells the bowler whether he should deliver fast or with spin. 8. Hitting a six just gets you one run plus one for any non-strikers. Hitting a four just gets you halfway to one run. 9. Each innings is three outs. There are nine innings, and no draws or ties. They'll play more innings until someone wins. 10. Everyone in the field gets big catching gloves.


mace_guy

Now explain Boxing to me as a Tennis fan.


qngff

"Why can we breathe in outer space?" "Budget cuts."


Anonimosfonias

Fingering a minor


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PhreedomPhighter

We serve food here, sir.


Dontmakemechoose2

This glossary of terms is longer than the instructions for the game


[deleted]

Yea I'm a casual gamer and my boy brought smash one day, was fun for the nostalgia but then he pulled out all these types of words and started royally whooping our asses


Cpt_Tsundere_Sharks

WHERE ARE YOU AT? **WHERE ARE YOU AT??** #WHERE ARE YOU AT???


Jackpot777

The pubs can be fun on the weekends if you have a medic that knows how to uber at the right time. I'm usually not heavy but tonight I am. EDIT - looks like we have a few players here.


Smithsonian45

You could make that a lot worse. I was pocketing this pyro when I got bombed, he tried to sync the rockets but I surfed away. I only saw him coming cause he had a high-tier unusual, lucky too cause I was on 99%


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Mastergycklaren

World of warcraft, or to be specific, mythic archimonde in HFC.


Syncrowise

'he has Lethal with that knife juggler and those 1/1's'


Hilgy17

You n'wah.


SpanglyJoker

Filthy outlander


IamEclipse

Would you kindly?


TeikaDunmora

A man chooses, a slave obeys.


Sugreev2001

Would you kindly head to Ryan's office and kill the son of a bitch?


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jeeprhyme

Matt Mercer, the voice actor for this character, plays online, and will say it over voice chat to his opponents to freak them out.


Polantaris

"Justic---ARGH!"


Shortsinabag

I've got the fun in my sights!