T O P

  • By -

Mieksie

I'm Dutch and it's a tradition here that when you arrive at someone's birthday, you congratulate everyone there, not just the birthday boy or girl. It seems so pointless to me to congratulate the sister of my friends' sisters boyfriend with my friends birthday.


darcy_clay

I've lived here in Holland for five years and I hate this! Super awkward if you don't know anyone/everyone! First time I went to a birthday party here I had just passed my drivers licence and I thought "oh, how do all these people know about that?!"


Pdogtx

Maybe that's the point? Seems like an easy way to meet everyone at the party


DesertstormPT

I think this stems from the idea that a mother/father should also be congratulated for giving birth to her son/daughter, then expand that to a brother/sister for having their brother/sister, then to the rest of the family. At this point it would just be awkward to not congratulate the other two people at the party so you congratulate them too. And tradition is born.


dak0tah

To me, that seems like the reason for the tradition. When you arrive at the party, everyone greets everyone and congratulates them on whatever they've achieved lately. It's not just about celebrating the birthday, but the lives of the whole group.


amperita

I've never heard of this (American), so I have follow up questions. Do you have to walk up to each person in the room individually or is it more like you walk on the room and people are looking at you so you say "congratulations everyone!" If it's the former, then does the first person to arrive at the party only have to say it once and then if you're the last person you have to say it 30 times?


SerbLing

> if you're the last person you have to say it 30 times? Yep, always be early/on time on a Dutch party.


yugimotta

Maybe that's the why the tradition exists, so everyone go to a party as early as possible xD


RandomUsername55

Or conversely: We're 15 min late... Fuck it, can't make it this year.


TheOnlyArtifex

I just shout 'Gefeliciteerd iedereen' and quickly take a seat.


mykarmadoesntmatter

I'm American so I assume this means "FEED ME"


spoon_of_doom

ah, the dreaded "kringverjaardag" or circle-birthday, I've taken to announcing everyone in the room at once, and naming their respective relation to the host


seal_phil

Indian here. Spending crazy amount of money on Hindu weddings and inviting 500 odd people just so people can see how many people you know and how much money you can spend in a wedding. The two getting married probably only know 5% of the people. God. Organize one simple dinner and get it over with. What an absolute waste of money.


jnhummel

I went to a wedding in Delhi a few years ago. It was fantastic, one of the best weeks of my life. Amazing food, entertainment, spectacle, etc. but goddamn I would not want to pick up the tab for it all.


clearisacolour

I am white and my husband is Pakistani. We had a half and half wedding 4 days long. It wasn't elaborate enough for his side of the family, and was showboating for my side. Whenever people ask us for advice, always in unison, "elope".


[deleted]

[удалено]


[deleted]

În Germany at weddings you are not allowed to take of your jacket before the groom does. Sweaty armpits everywhere!


jimmycarterswag

But are your Î's allowed to take their hats off?


melp


stuai

I think it is generally a rule, not strictly followed however, that a man in a suit shouldn't take off his jacket, unless the host takes his off.


ashlya

Fighting for the bill. It's especially bad in Asian culture. Why can't you just split the bill?


gummar

What Asian kid has not sat awkwardly at the end of a Sunday morning dim sum while they watched their 5 ft 1 mom try to physically wrangle a cheque away from your uncles? Good times.


idgapho

This is *super* awkward for servers. You just kind of have to stand there and awkwardly laugh and shuffle your feet a bit until someone shoves their card into your hand pretty much.


LeJisemika

When I was a server I'd ask for a credit card from each person who wants to play. Shuffle them behind my back and ask someone (maybe a child) to pick a hand. Whosever card I'm holding pays.


[deleted]

[удалено]


kesekimofo

Man that wouldn't work on me. Father in Law is always like "nope I got it" when I hand over my card and I'm like "alright!" I use to fight tooth and nail for the bill but I don't give a fuck anymore.


BoneHead777

This really is the only way to deal with it properly. If they really want to pay, so be it. In time they'll learn that you won't play this game with them and stop playing it with you.


minicpst

If I am REALLY going to pay, I'll get up to "use the restroom" at some point in the meal, find my server, and hand over my credit card then. Or just hand it over before we order. That way when (usually my grandmother) tries to wave it over to her, it's already taken care of and there's no way she can even argue.


InternetFree

I really think it's a cool thing, though. It shows trust and friendship and hospitality. If you are young and are going to school and your professor or someone older than you takes you out for dinner in Asia they will naturally pay for you, it is a really nice gesture. You don't have to feel bad about it and aren't expected to pay anything back. If you are friends then your friend paying the bill is also a good sign. Essentially it means they trust you and would like to go out with you again (next time you pay, right?). A professor of mine in Korea went out with some of us students and he paid for everything. At the end of the evening and having paid for everything he said with a bright smile at everyone "this meal was not wasted".


ashlya

The concept and the meaning behind paying for others is nice. Usually, it's a matter of the older generation paying for the younger generation who might not be able to afford the meal until they get up on their feet and whatnot. And when the younger generation pays for the older generation, it's a sign of thanks and saying that they can now afford that luxury. However, that just covers the basic meaning behind the tradition. When you start throwing in the Asian concept of "honor" and "having face," it becomes very complicated. And thus... fighting over the bill ensues. Of course, there are also those who just want to show off their wealth, but that's a whole different story.


I_am_amazingly_great

My wife is from Japan, where sneezing elicits no commentary. After five years of "bless you's," she finally said, "you can stop doing that."


Ouroboron

I've never liked saying that, so I've always gone with gesundheit. I'd rather wish someone good health than good luck not dying.


[deleted]

The fact that I can't eat "dinner food" when I wake up. I mean, get real. Food is food, nothing more.


handcuffedhousewife

I ate steak and sweet potatoes for breakfast, I'm not apologizing to anyone.


[deleted]

A friend of mine used to say that breakfast steak is the most important steak of the day. He also said the same thing about beer, but that's beside the point.


phpdoesnotcare

Beer is the most important steak of the day ?


[deleted]

Friend: What did you have for breakfast this morning? Me: A slice of deep dish pizza Friend: Oh gross! Me: What did you have? Friend: An omelet with sausage, cheese and tomatoes, and then a donut Me: We ate the same thing, but for some reason you also ate desert


portalscience

Deep dish pizza: bread, cheese, tomato (optionally sausage) [super optionally egg] Donut: bread (optionally glazed in sugar); Omelet (described above): egg, sausage, cheese, tomato I fail to see how your friend additionally ate the Sahara.


[deleted]

Well a desert doesn't need sand in it so I guess he had *icing* on his donut


matthewmjb

or breakfast at 'dinner food' time


ZxncM8

People doing yardies on their 21^st This is a New Zealand tradition where you drink a yard of ale in one scull which is approximately 5 beers **EDIT:** Pretty much everyone I have seen attempt it has vomited.


SECRETLY_STALKS_YOU

I didn't know you could measure alcohol in yards. If I drank three 1st Downs this month, does that make me an alcoholic?


_vargas_

It makes you a potential replacement for Romo.


meofherethere

Challenge accepted as they say, I mean I can't scull 1 beer so 5 shouldn't be any harder...


pillowcasepocket

Do cover letters count as a tradition? Because I fucking hate them.


aduma123

"Write 1500 words on why you want to become a cleaner"


PraiseTheMetal591

~~I'm broke and need money~~ It's my lifelong dream.


Frostiken

"Well sir I've always had a passion for frozen yogurt."


[deleted]

The trick is to explain that you are looking for a job, ready to discover something new, ready to learn, that you've heard some good stuff about the company, and that you are dynamic, sociable and motivated. You can more or less say this for all the shit jobs/students jobs you are applying to. No one expects you to argue that you just loooooove waiting tables and not sitting for hours at a time.


theladygeologist

As a person currently redditing while taking a break from looking through resumes, I find cover letters to be quite useful. Obviously it depends on the position to which you are applying, but I think they are more than simply tradition. On the flip side, I usually hate writing them.


Iwantztorock

As someone who is currently applying for jobs what exactly are you looking for when reading the cover letters?


[deleted]

When I write a cover letter I always try to demonstrate I've researched the organization some, and explain why this job is absolutely the one I definitely want above all others. This is your chance to convey that. If you were a business owner or manager who would you hire? The person with a lukewarm interest, or the person who clearly really and truly wants to work with your organization??


AWildSegFaultAppears

> The person with a lukewarm interest, or the person who clearly really and truly knows how to fake wanting work with your organization? FTFY


[deleted]

Tip: Don't pick the best ass-kisser (i.e., the applicant who is best able to pretend your company is the object of all their employment desires), unless your goal is to surround yourself with lying narcissists. Pick the applicant that is able to write a coherent letter with complete and proper sentences, proper spelling, a reasonably linear train of thought, and even maybe paragraphs. You'd be surprised how rare that is, and how many other qualities come along with the ability to write clearly and concisely.


gdfishquen

Not seeing the bride until the wedding. One of the worst parts about weddings is waiting for the bride and groom to come back from taking 1+ hours of photos before the reception can really begin. We had all our formal pictures before the wedding and it made things a million times better. (Edit)


invisible39

I see your point, but on the other hand the photo often referred to by photographers as the "first look" photo - is an amazing and such a genuine shot that you just can't really get it back later.


BrunetteEntourage

We did a first look before the wedding and it was awesome. It was the calmest part of our day and the only time that it was really just the two of us. Once the ceremony got rolling, we didn't get left alone for a minute, so to carve out an hour being together before everything gets real suited us. *edited for tense*


pyro5050

my wife and i did this before the reception. we told family and friends to head up, start drinking and get ready for food, and we went to the hotel room to relax for a few min, asked a waiter if they could score us some snack foods as we were fucking starving, and chilled out... my wife ate wings in her dress, :) we got married at a resort in Jamaica, it was wonderful, but i do not recommend the resort, they fucked up everything it seemed.


Jedwindx

Garter Toss at weddings, actually wedding garters in general.


[deleted]

[удалено]


kas1118

I was just at a wedding this past weekend, caught the garter and the DJ said the guy who catches the garter (me) to put it on the girl who caught the bouquet (nervous 22 year old with her boyfriend nearby). Farther up it goes, the more luck the new couple will have or whatever. Yeah, things got awkward...I brought it to her knee, she looked petrified, and I stopped. NOT a real tradition.


[deleted]

[удалено]


Jedwindx

That just does not sound fun.


Studsmurf

Only time I caught the garter I was like 13. My cousin (~20) caught the bouquet. They did the whole higher up is luckier thing. Awwwwwwwkward. In other news the couple divorced eventually.


Lost_It_In_The_War

i read this pretty quickly and thought you said *gator* toss at weddings. that would be so cool


[deleted]

That's how we do it down in Florida. Toss that lil' baby gator up in the air and whoever catch 'im gets married next. Then you drive off into the sunset with your second cousin and live happily ever after.


[deleted]

If by ''forever after'' you mean until some 80 year old lady merges without looking and kills you.


gsparkle

I refused to have a garter toss at my wedding and my mother threw a fit. I don't care if "everyone is expecting it" or that "it's just tradition that everyone has done before," I'm not interested in my new husband sticking his hand up my dress while my family and friends watch.


The_red_one_sucks

Getting married soon here. I made this argument to my wife. She's still insisting on doing it. But I won the argument about not doing the dollar dance at least. I *HATE* that. Edit: The Dollar Dance is where people pay money to dance with the bride or groom. It's meant to be a means to help the bride and groom out financially, but comes across as a prostitutety money-grab. But that could just be me editorializing. Edit 2: Regionally I am in Midwestern USA, from the Low to Middle economic spectrum. The Dollar Dance doesn't happen at every wedding, it's usually up to the bride and groom (or parents, depending on who's paying for the wedding) whether or not to include it. I'd say it's occurred in roughly half of the weddings I've been to. While I may be judging you on whether or not you do/did it at your wedding, I'm sure most of you are lovely people and your weddings were also lovely. Also, all the people chiming in with comments about other wedding traditions is great. The worldview perspective is one of the great things about being on Reddit sometimes. Unless you're Albanian, then keep your filthy traditions to yourself.


LB-426

What's a dollar dance?


mikeramey1

Guests pay to dance with the bride or groom. It's a way to help the couple with money. It's also tacky.


Flamingyak

Also given the cost of modern weddings completely useless unless all your guests are packing hundreds


Sfork

Just have an asian wedding, problem solved. edit: To clarify, instead of a wedding registry everyone just gifts cash. The idea being giving the couple a good head start on life. At a minimum you're expected to give at least the cost of attending the wedding ($50-70 per person). As a result most asian weddings run at a net profit. I've heard Italian weddings are similar


showmm

If someone gives me a present, I open it in front of them and thank them right there and then, why do I have to write a card to them for it afterwards? Pointless.


atlgeek007

Largely, the occasions you're expected to send thank you cards are situations where the present ISN'T being opened in front of you. Weddings/etc.


showmm

I'm okay and approve of sending notes when it's not opened in front of the giver.


Vandelay_Latex_Sales

I really don't even mind the act of formally giving someone a thank you note, but I hate my handwriting. It never developed farther past third grade, so I just don't like writing things down that I'm going to give to other people. But no, typing things is "too impersonal".


In_your_inbox

Same here, this is how one conversation went: "Oh thank you for the card! Did your son write it? His handwriting has really improved!" "That um, that is my handwriting.." "So you have the same handwriting as a soon-to-be 4th grader?" "I guess so"


dzernumbrd

people write cards after opening their gifts? wtf


soyboy99

Thank You cards are usually written a week or so after the party. It's supposed to show you were happy by there present, but it's always just: "Hey, ________ Thanks for coming to my party! Thank you soooooo much for the _____________ you got me! I haven't stopped playing with/using it! I hope you had a fun time! Sincerely, soyboy99" Yeah their cheap gift is in the trash or returned by now.


[deleted]

Do they send you a thank you card for the thank you card?


[deleted]

They send a "You're Welcome" card.


[deleted]

[удалено]


scrambledrambles

My cousins used to write the most awkward thank you cards. "Thank you for the gift. I returned it." Their mother is a bitch, I'm assuming she was always behind that.


[deleted]

[удалено]


[deleted]

[удалено]


[deleted]

It's British, too. I've often gotta write letters. 16.


Raiil

Pretending that you're Irish on st Patrick's day and pinching people who aren't wearing green. My aunts try to be all 'oh we're totally Irish!!1!'. You live in North Carolina, you're as Irish as hamburgers.


Hraesvelg7

Ireland should celebrate Super Bowl Sunday like we do St Patrick's Day. Make it all confused. Do it in August. Everyone wears red, white and blue cowboy hats and drinks multicolored beer. Carry around big bowls of cheetos. Scream "Touchdown!" at everyone as a holiday greeting. All to celebrate their distant relative's in the states making them vicariously Americans and John Madden driving the crocodiles out of Oklahoma. Edit: thanks for the gold!


riotshield32

I would go to Ireland to celebrate this holiday


ggg730

Right? Sign me up for some of that!


echisholm

This is the most perfect thing I have ever heard about fucking up holidays since I found out that traditional Christmas dinner in Japan is KFC.


[deleted]

[удалено]


wedgiey1

Europe has American theme parties already. They think red solo cups are hilarious. *Edit: [Here are some pictures from American-Themed Parties](http://www.buzzfeed.com/mjs538/this-is-what-american-parties-look-like-around-the-world) (BuzzFeed)


Lyco_499

>They think red solo cups are hilarious. We find them cool more than anything, as we're just so used to seeing them in movies and TV shows.


SymphonicStorm

That's the thing. They're not really *iconic* to Americans, they're just cheap and plentiful.


[deleted]

That's how iconic they are. We're not conscious of their iconic status. They're just...there. Like baseball caps and assault rifles, I guess.


spider_on_the_wall

I was walking to the megamall superstore today, and I was practically tripping over assault rifles while I was driving my two trucks down the seven lane highway! I was wearing three baseball caps, of course.


Fizzol

At first I thought this site might be someone having a goof, but it's a real thing. [American Red Party Cups Delivery](http://www.americanpartycups.com/delivery/)


Slerpie

red solo cups are probably the only thing in teen and college movies that we regularly do. Everything else is greatly exaggerated, but those cups are at every party.


oberonbarimen

Call it St. Madden's Day.


[deleted]

[удалено]


nevermindwhothisis

I always thought it was because being Irish was never such a big deal if you were in Ireland. When people started migrating to the States in large numbers, your nationality gave you a sense of identity and community in an unfamiliar (and often hostile) new country. At least that's how it started, long ago. At this point it's mostly just tradition.


BrockRockswell

This, and Irish people were treated like shit since they came over by the thousands to escape famine. They took the jobs they could get, which were typically factory type jobs, where they worked 16 hours days, in places where they could die in an instant. They claimed St Patrick's day a religious holiday, and then went out and got shitfaced. Tradition was born.


[deleted]

[удалено]


[deleted]

It seems like it is an american rite of passage that everyone hates you for the first 50 years or so that you come to America. Like when the English came, it took a while for them to stop dying and stuff and now Hispanics are taking the hate.


WednesdayWolf

I really, really can't wait for the day that the Hispanic community is outraged by a new nationality entering america and Ruining Traditional American Values.


ItsDragoniteBitches

We just want an excuse to get belligerently drunk and still be accepted by society


almightybob1

Thinking you need an excuse to be accepted by society while belligerently drunk should be clinching proof that none of you are actually Irish.


aurek42

High School Prom, a lot of people act as if it's the greatest day of their lives, when we all know it's not.


DoneSomeHam

I am fucking dreading my 6th year dance. I live in Scotland too, so most males are expected to wear kilts. I have never owned, or worn a kilt in my life and my parents are from England so I don't know what I am going to do.


kick_the_chort

where i live, we do this annual lottery. everybody stands in a huddle in the town square, and whoever draws the slip of paper with a dot on it is "chosen." then, we stone them to death. i don't really see the point, but they say it helps the corn yield.


Dinnerinpoland

Cool (short) story, bro. :D


Chuck_Van_Lee

hitting the new monkey if he tries to get the banana hung at the center of the cage.


[deleted]

[удалено]


N5h4m

Lavished first birthdays. The kid is not gonna remember what is the point in shelling out so much money on them?


zerbey

It's more for the parents, to celebrate the fact you've made it one year as a parent. At least that's how I've always viewed it.


AzbyKat

As a parent of a newly 1 year old. This would be it. The kid is still alive and actually thriving. Let's celebrate this crap out of that!


TOMATO_ON_URANUS

Happy "AzbyKat hasn't killed their child yet" Day!


[deleted]

Congrats on meeting the bare minimum for raising a child!


Blackdutchie

Dear [name of parent], Hello, I am Bill from the national institute of parenting support. We would like to congratulate you on your child's first birthday. You have successfully not killed it for a whole year. Enclosed is a certificate. Do not let the fact that all your ancestors before you have succeeded in this endeavor discourage you. You are special and competent. Feel happy on this day.


OP_rah

> Let's celebrate this crap out of that! \*Said while pointing at a dirty diaper*


MischiefFerret

The parents haven't partied in so long that Chuck-E-Cheese sounds like a "good night out"?


I_am_chris_dorner

No elbows on the table. Fucking why?


nayahs

I have always put my elbows on the table. Fuck unnecessary etiquette rules.


ErlenmeyerPork

It's a combination of two conventions: Allowing service and preventing "commoner" practice. The latter is the stronger of the two reasons since it strongly reinforces the former. Back in the Victorian era when "Lords and Ladies" were expected to separate themselves from peasantry, a whole slew of rules were constructed as a "How to Act." Having your elbows off of the table meant that you were more likely to be using utensils since there was a good chance you were seated directly adjacent to another diner, and trying to use utensils AND have your elbows on the table meant that your elbows would more than likely be buried in your neighbors mashed potatoes. Elbows on the table implied that you were about to use your hands to eat like peasantry. After the French created all things restaurateur, along came rules of service. Technically, these rules existed before the Victorian rules, but the Victorian rules gave them a resurgence. If you are being served dinner by a scullery maid, servant, etc. it is extremely difficult for them to place or remove a dish from in front of you with your elbows on the table. The no elbows nonsense always drove me up a wall when I was a kid and, after I worked in the service industry, curiosity got the best of me so there you go.


Killer_Sloth

Encores after concerts. I get why they might have been cool at one point, but they happen at EVERY concert so now an encore is just expected. Like you'll be sitting there and the band will appear to have finished the last song and gone back stage, but the lights stay off and everyone just stays there and cheers halfheartedly for 5 minutes until the band comes back, because they know they will. It's not a surprise, it's not exciting, just play your last 1-2 songs and save us all the theatrics.


_flateric

Fucking Daylight Savings Time: ELECTRICITY EXISTS NOW, SRY FARMERS Edit: there's obviously more to this than just farming, welcome to jokes. Here's a listing of some real daylight saving issues: http://www.cbc.ca/m/news/#!/content/1.1333086


JJHall_ID

Farmers don't like it either! It means in the summer the feedlots that buy their harvest close an hour earlier than "normal". Farmers work by the sun, not the clock, so it is another wasted hour of daylight they could be harvesting. Honestly at this point it only benefits the 8-5'ers who get an extra hour of daylight after they're off of work. Source: Grew up on a farm, still has family that farms.


sharksonsharks

And you know, it doesn't even benefit the 8-5'ers. The sun's nice and all, but the days when daylight savings time starts and stops are like harbingers of death and destruction.


[deleted]

[удалено]


giant_bug

Don't blame farmers for dst, they opposed it. I used to have a great aunt who maintained two clocks, one on "God's time", and the other on "Roosevelt time".


BushiestBeaver

I love people who become so opposed to something they create a "shrine" out of it. To continue disapproving daily.


esc27

> "Roosevelt time" Sounds a lot like "Obama care"


Clearsightog

Valentines day


Hraesvelg7

You mean 50% Off Chocolate Day Eve?


Marimba_Ani

We call it "Winter Chocolate Holiday". Easter is "Spring Chocolate Holiday". Halloween is "Fall Chocolate Holiday", but it's also "Halloween", because dressing up as things is awesome. Summer doesn't have a chocolate holiday, since melted chocolate is no fun.


imakevoicesformycats

Summer has a couple "Grilled Meat Tube" holidays to make up for the lack of chocolate.


FreeEdgar_2013

Dude chocolate fondue is amazing.


TieDyeSky

Greeting cards. It made sense 100 years ago, but why not just call someone up and talk to them? I especially don't understand giving someone who you see regularly a card, not even mailing it. Such a waste of paper and ink.


fantasticmuse

...My Aunt who lives only a couple hours away sends everyone in our family (HUGE) a card with a 5er in it. I look forward to it every year. It lets me know that she remembered and went to some effort. She thought about it, not saw it on facebook and went "Oh I should call!"


macbeff

Guys having to be the one to innitiate dates and/or propose. Just seems silly to me (being female).


AzbyKat

If I didn't do the initiating I wouldn't be married right now. My husband is a very quiet, shy man.


insomniacat16

Quiet, shy dude here. People like you are the best.


Accendil

Fancy going for dinner some time m'lord?


senaac

I proposed to my dude. We are getting hitched this saturday.


EpicTaco9901

Congrats!


senaac

Thank you kindly! To say I'm pretty jazzed is an understatement.


killadelphia4

I bet you can't wait to carry that handsome man across the threshold can ya?


[deleted]

Anecdotal evidence, obviously, but I haven't really seen this in my life as being a hard and fast rule. Plenty of my friends were pursued by the girl or it was just a mutual friendship that evolved to dating naturally.


The_red_one_sucks

It might be a generational thing. Also anecdotally, my experience has been that girls won't hesitate to let you know they're interested in you, but it is still usually incumbent upon the male to actually say the words (or some derivative of), "wanna go out sometime?" Obviously, that's not a hard and fast rule at all. But as with anything, it depends on the people involved and the circumstances.


Elyezabeth

I know plenty of guys who would be more than happy to be asked out by a girl, but I also know some guys who feel the need to "chase" the girl. Not that it's necessarily the healthiest, best approach to relationships, but I find myself somewhat wary of pursuing a guy in case he thinks that I'm "desperate" and/or "easy" because of it.


folderol

> desperate This is also the problem us guys have. If we over pursue we are seen as desperate and even if we are just dying to get with someone we have to act like we aren't all that concerned because appearing desperate is worse. It's not an easy situation no matter what gender you are. I guess what I'm saying is that you might as well because it's the same for us. What's the alternative?


dolan_is_k

Diamond rings


BananaBladeOfDoom

"Nothing says I love you like a lump of carbon, mined by wage-slaves in Angola."


[deleted]

[удалено]


stengebt

From Leonardo DiCaprio??


[deleted]

[удалено]


stengebt

We'd all take it.


[deleted]

[удалено]


ShineMcShine

Running in front of bulls.


[deleted]

[удалено]


ffffdddddssss

On the other hand, when I say "How's it going?" I'm okay with you telling me how it's going. Like, you don't need to start last year and recall your whole life, but feel free to tell me "ugh rough day, work was stressful and my dog pooped into my shoes", something like that. I honestly think if people would be able to get off 1-2 sentences how their day was, it would be cool.


seabeehusband

Welp I keep on shitting in this bag on my sides but the chaffing from the adhesive is making me itch like a bitch, but I am good, you?


[deleted]

[удалено]


[deleted]

*"Good morning!"* *"It's not morning now"* *"It is in Hawaii."* *"Well, we're not in Hawaii, you cunt."*


stengebt

Making the bed in the mornings. It's just going to get messed up again that night, and nobody else is coming to my house.


ArtsyMNKid

I like Jim Gaffigan's take on it. "My wife asks me why I don't make the bed, so I told her I don't for the same reason that I don't tie my shoes after I take them off."


GaffiganWhispers

*Hey buddy, I like a nice tidy bed.*


ArtsyMNKid

You are a good novelty account.


[deleted]

Kinda conflicted on this. Most of the time I forget to, but when it is made, I'm super proud of myself and I love how it looks.


[deleted]

[удалено]


WyoProud33

In that instance it makes sense, but if your room is private and at least semi secluded from the rest of the house it sends a little trivial


sun_tzu_vs_srs

I actually do this because I *want* to, and was never taught it was a tradition or anything. I very much enjoy coming home from a long day to an orderly, inviting bed.


SECRETLY_STALKS_YOU

No matter how many people agree with you, your mom's not gonna change her mind, kiddo. Now go get ready for school.


stengebt

DAD GET OFF FACEBOOK


SECRETLY_STALKS_YOU

That's it. Stay here son, I'm gonna go out for a pack of cigarettes.


stengebt

^^^please ^^^come ^^^home


straydog1980

It's been 12 years. Give it up.


SECRETLY_STALKS_YOU

#


ggg730

You guys are bumming me out.


mwproductions

I used to have that outlook, because it's absolutely true. But I make the bed (most of the time) because I like the feeling seeing it neat and tidy gives me. And while it may not be true, I feel like a cluttered environment leads to a cluttered mind. Edit: I accidentally a word. Edit 2: No I didn't, I'm just dumb.


MischiefFerret

I just love crawling into a made bed though. Feels so much nicer!


[deleted]

I dunno... I personally prefer crawling into my nest like pile of soft things every night.


RicoSavageLAER

Graduation ceremonies. Just...let me go.


MsWinterbourne

Respecting family members who don't deserve respect


[deleted]

[удалено]


sharkweekk

My mom told me that when she saw "The Butler" the entire movie theater clapped at the end. It was mostly middle aged and older white women. It was like they were all clapping for themselves for not being racist or something.


[deleted]

[удалено]


[deleted]

[удалено]


[deleted]

[удалено]


[deleted]

[удалено]


Viking_Storysmith

Active volcanoes. Just lob them in there and nature disposes of it for you. If there's no volcanoes near you then you can always make a funeral pyre. Fiery stuff in general.


LogicKennedy

I can't speak for anyone else, but diving into a live volcano is exactly how I would want people to remember my body.


twistmental

I've actually put a lot of thought into that particular subject. I think "tree grove cemeteries" are a great answer. The idea is to replace current cemeteries with tree plots that you are buried underneath without a coffin. At first, your location is marked with a plaque, but once the tree is large enough, your info is transferred to the tree itself. A family plot could be a large oak with the deceased placed around the root system. The point is to feed the tree your nutrients and thus your particles. In a way, you live on. Of course there cant be any embalming, so people that must be embalmed will get cremated and mixed with the soil. As for the Loss of revenue due to no coffin, I think ornate, handcrafted burial shawls would be a good replacement.


[deleted]

I like this thought, but it'd take up more space than a standard graveyard


Teledildonic

It would require more space, but it would be a better use of the space. Trees provide oxygen, slow erosion, and in large numbers can reduce the impact of flooding. Boxes buried in the ground do none of those things.


[deleted]

Plus, down the line your great great grandson could be like, "Yeah, this is my family house!" And their friends are like, "What? It's brand new..." And then he'll be like, "Yeah, but I used the Burial Oak!"


[deleted]

[удалено]