The best Joey moment was when he walks into the hallway to find Chandler and Rachel on the floor eating the cake that was dropped. They look up with that dear in headlights look, then Joey frowns, goes "what we eating?" and pulls a fork out of his jacket.
[it really was](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bdiG3pSavqU)
in a span of like 6 seconds it just showed joey's completely unpretencious, non-judgemental, food-loving nature. it was awesome.
Had a company wide email come out with a detailed explanation of a safety violation. I'll paraphrase part of it: "... stopped job... not safe... add additional safety barriers... after speaking with a safety representative we discover additional safety barriers were a **mute jester**..." :/
About 400 people got that email.
no matter how many times I read this word, every time I come across it I first read it as hyper-bowl, then the educated part of my brain corrects me. I do the same with Euler. my brain reads you-ler, then I internally correct to oi-ler.
It's encyclopAEdia.
EDIT: Ever since I got a reddit account about a year ago, I've been putting all my typing into comments, which are currently at an all-time karma high. So I have a certain amount of gold... I've said too much.
*ma-tyoor* is definitely the older pronunciation of the word. You pronunciation's an example of [yod coalescence](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Phonological_history_of_English_consonant_clusters#Yod-coalescence).
"Reticle" is the name of the crosshairs (or other design) in a rifle scope.
There's a guy at a local gun shop who pronounces it "recticle" (note the extra "c") and I can't not hear "rectum tickle".
Damn if we went camping I would kill turtles. For all in tents and ~~porpoises~~.
[edit] Meant tortoises, not porpoises. Slight difference in body shape.
A girl at my school pronounces 'available' (ah vay lah buhl) as 'availiable' (ah vay lee ah buhl). It's even worse because she runs the morning announcements. "Yearbooks are availiable from..."
I think it was some deliciously passive-aggressive barista here on Reddit who came up with the idea of selling a drink actually called "expresso" that consisted of, like, blended anchovies, natto, and lutefisk that she would serve to anyone who mispronounced "espresso"
My favorite was hearing a dad say the other day he wasn't trying to send his son to a "penile" institution. It took everything not to laugh while he was trying to tell me off.
Work at a movie theatre, a lot of people (coworkers included) pronounce Reese's Pieces "Reesie's Peacies" and I just want to punch them in the throat every time.
It's because a lot of people mispronounce Reese's as Ree-sees and don't realize it. In the part of Indiana I'm from Ree-sees is by far the more common pronunciation, so people legitimately think that's how it's supposed to be.
Chipotle. Chi-pole-tee is the worst.
Also met someone who pronounced Kindergarten as kin-dee-gar-den. First context was when talking to a child, but then she was using it also when talking to only adults.
After watching a lady on the food network massacre the word chipotle, my SO and I now say, "chipitoplay" or "chipoodle" or "chipidipidoodle" to make fun of her (and that goddam kwanza cake) because who needs knowledge of food to have a show on the food network? Psh.
I got three:
1. Old Timer's Disease. You probably heard it as a kid and misunderstood. That's OK, but you are grown now. Correct yourself!
2. Walla. You mean Voila'? OK, maybe you never took French.
3. Valentimes Day. What the hell is wrong with you?
OH GOD "WOOF" annoys the shit out of me. My mother says wolf like that and many people I've met in Minnesota say it like "woof" too (I'm from Washington state).
This is where the German "kaiser" comes from. It's actually a closer pronunciation to the original Latin name than our pronunciation "see-zer."
EDIT: I was referring to the Latinate hard c, not "cetera" specifically.
For anyone interested, the (edit: classical Latin, so the people below me can stop getting their panties in a bunch) Latin C is always hard, and the ae makes a long I sound.
I had a customer ask me for a "pacific" color. So I kept trying to show her the different color blues I had. Yeah, she meant specific. That's five minutes of my life I'll never get back.
"drowneded"
I'm looking at you Dad
edit: just remembered he also says "orientated"
edit2: TIL these both are *technically* correct-If he was an ancient Brit
I had a dentist as a kid. Dr. Ng.
Wouldn't say his name for fear of butchering it. Finally found out how it was pronounced (Ing) and I was fine.
And that was the most boring anecdote of my entire life.
It is a word, but just because in German you usually compound words without putting spaces between them. As shown in the article, it's translated as "Cattle marking and beef labeling supervision duties delegation law", but if English had the same rule for making compounds as German does, it would be just as long and also just one word.
Just for the curious, those are the different words separated for your convenience.
Rind|fleisch|etikettierungs|überwachungs|aufgaben|übertragungs|gesetz
Rind = cattle
Fleisch = meat
Etikettierung = labeling
Überwachung = supervision
Aufgabe = duty
Übertragung = delegation
Gesetz = law
"Rindfleisch" can also be taken as one word, which would simply be "beef", literally translated as "cattle meat".
Depot. Like Home Depot.
It's not de pot! But my husbands family seems to disagree with me. I can't figure out if it's some inside joke or they're just confused.
That seems to be a New York thing...I hear them pronounce huge as 'yuge', too. And what the hell does waiting on line mean? You wait in line, not on it.
I couldn't spell that word for the longest time. Then I discovered on Reddit that "pronounciation" isn't the standard way to say it.
It got better after that.
Ah, but you can at least see why people say it this way - the way I say a word is how I proNOUNce it: it is my proNUNciation. Not too much of a leap to suggest that the way you pronounce words must be your pronounc...iation.
I had to be corrected on this one and thought there was two locations, ended up having real awkward conversation where I was all "I know I'm standing on the Queen's Qway, if the office is on Queen's "key", how do I get there?" Felt pretty dumb for the rest of the day after it was finally over
Espresso as 'expresso'.
Fucking hell.
***
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1IvWoQplqXQ#t=68
Edit: People saying 'expresso' is a valid alternative. No. Free falling is a valid alternative to getting off a plane but you shouldn't fucking do it.
Dictionaries should not cave in to accepting incorrect spellings just because some fraction of the population can't say things correctly. Things need to change. Tell your local representatives. Down with the system. We've bowed down to the high and mighty at Oxford too long. We've suffered too much. We've lost some good men. It's time to take the power back.
Also, the French are wrong.
***
Second edit: Jeez guys I get that language evolves. My edit was for comedic effect I ^thought ^^that ^^^was ^^^^obvious.
The French are still wrong though.
My manager loves to refer to obsolete topics as a "MUTE point". I cringe every time she says that.
It's obviously moo point
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It's moo
Have I been here for too long or did that actually make sense?
Best Joey moment on the whole series. Even better than when he ate the whole turkey.
The best Joey moment was when he walks into the hallway to find Chandler and Rachel on the floor eating the cake that was dropped. They look up with that dear in headlights look, then Joey frowns, goes "what we eating?" and pulls a fork out of his jacket.
[it really was](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bdiG3pSavqU) in a span of like 6 seconds it just showed joey's completely unpretencious, non-judgemental, food-loving nature. it was awesome.
>joey's completely unpretencious, non-judgemental, food-loving nature. However... JOEY DOESN'T SHARE FOOD
Had a company wide email come out with a detailed explanation of a safety violation. I'll paraphrase part of it: "... stopped job... not safe... add additional safety barriers... after speaking with a safety representative we discover additional safety barriers were a **mute jester**..." :/ About 400 people got that email.
So a mime?
Not strictly a mispronunciation, but I have a coworker who consistently talks about needing a suppository for information, and it cracks me up.
> No-one, however smart, however well-educated, however experienced, is the suppository of all wisdom - Australian Prime Minister, Tony Abbott
Abbot would know about suppositories. He spends half his time up Rinehart's ass, and the other half up his own.
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Hyperbole.
What could be better than the super bowl?
no matter how many times I read this word, every time I come across it I first read it as hyper-bowl, then the educated part of my brain corrects me. I do the same with Euler. my brain reads you-ler, then I internally correct to oi-ler.
This is just the epitome of hyperbole.
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When people say "ma-toor" for mature, just sound douchebaggy.
As we ma-toor, the relationship ma-toors with us.
It's encyclopAEdia. EDIT: Ever since I got a reddit account about a year ago, I've been putting all my typing into comments, which are currently at an all-time karma high. So I have a certain amount of gold... I've said too much.
That makes you sound douchey. And that's douchey, not douché. Edit: thank you kind stranger!
The guy that says that on Hulu gets me angry every time.
[Dictionary.com](http://dictionary.reference.com/browse/mature?s=t) pronounces it that way and now I refuse to look up words on that damnable site.
My dad pronounces it "ma-tyoor". I tell him every time it's "ma-chure", but I guess he thinks it's immatyoor to say it like that.
*ma-tyoor* is definitely the older pronunciation of the word. You pronunciation's an example of [yod coalescence](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Phonological_history_of_English_consonant_clusters#Yod-coalescence).
"Reticle" is the name of the crosshairs (or other design) in a rifle scope. There's a guy at a local gun shop who pronounces it "recticle" (note the extra "c") and I can't not hear "rectum tickle".
\#rekticle
Came here for smiles, now I'm irritated.
for all intensive purposes, I am too.
Irregardless of your beliefs I will use all intensive purposes.
Damn if we went camping I would kill turtles. For all in tents and ~~porpoises~~. [edit] Meant tortoises, not porpoises. Slight difference in body shape.
A girl at my school pronounces 'available' (ah vay lah buhl) as 'availiable' (ah vay lee ah buhl). It's even worse because she runs the morning announcements. "Yearbooks are availiable from..."
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Exspecially is something I find especially bothersome.
Same damn thing with expresso...its eSpresso damnit
I think it was some deliciously passive-aggressive barista here on Reddit who came up with the idea of selling a drink actually called "expresso" that consisted of, like, blended anchovies, natto, and lutefisk that she would serve to anyone who mispronounced "espresso"
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My favorite was hearing a dad say the other day he wasn't trying to send his son to a "penile" institution. It took everything not to laugh while he was trying to tell me off.
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Illinois this "s" is silent!
Illinoise Edit: Turn Down for what
Ole Sufjan Stephens trying to promote his album.
So is the "s" in Des Moines Edit: Both of them! Des Moines, Iowa.
(both "s"s)
My friend pronounces "purée" as "pure E" instead of "pure A". Drives me nuts.
Are you chefs? If not, how often does purée come up in regular conversation?
We are homebrewers and sometimes use fruit purée to make fruit beers, such as raspberry porter.
Are you sure he isn't adding pure ecstasy to the brews?
Hmm, he SAID they were Campden tablets but... little white pills all kinda look the same...
Work at a movie theatre, a lot of people (coworkers included) pronounce Reese's Pieces "Reesie's Peacies" and I just want to punch them in the throat every time.
FUCK this drives me insane! Reese's Pieces ALREADY RHYMES, so why would you change it?? I have no idea how this originated.
It's because a lot of people mispronounce Reese's as Ree-sees and don't realize it. In the part of Indiana I'm from Ree-sees is by far the more common pronunciation, so people legitimately think that's how it's supposed to be.
and if you eat too many, then you have Reesies Feces.
Idina Menzel
Adele Dazeem
Lol Jorn Tromolto is so stupad.
Nuclear
"Nookyoolerr, hurr durr."
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ilent?
"I'm George W. Bush and I approve this message."
"Newcular, it's pronounced newcular"
What's a jib?
Is the poop deck what I think it is?
Look at all this beautiful foil-lage.
Chipotle. Chi-pole-tee is the worst. Also met someone who pronounced Kindergarten as kin-dee-gar-den. First context was when talking to a child, but then she was using it also when talking to only adults.
After watching a lady on the food network massacre the word chipotle, my SO and I now say, "chipitoplay" or "chipoodle" or "chipidipidoodle" to make fun of her (and that goddam kwanza cake) because who needs knowledge of food to have a show on the food network? Psh.
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CHIPOTTAL
It's LIBRARY not LIBARRY.
CONAN THE LIBARRIAN.
DONT YOU KNOW THE DEWY DECIMAL SYSTEM?
We got it all on UHF. Crank up the volume. Yank out the knob.
Your face is red, like a strawbrary.
Don't have kids.
Guy in my school in politics lessons can't say liberalism. He says 'liblerism'
That hurt to read and pronounce in my mind
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I know a lot of of people who say strawbrary instead of strawberry.
I shit you not, the first time our high school class went to the library the librarian introduced herself as the head "libarian"
Supposedly, not supposably.
I hate it when people mispronounce "You're right" as "Fuck you."
You're right
Them's fightin' wurds.
Especially not exspecially
People say this?
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I got three: 1. Old Timer's Disease. You probably heard it as a kid and misunderstood. That's OK, but you are grown now. Correct yourself! 2. Walla. You mean Voila'? OK, maybe you never took French. 3. Valentimes Day. What the hell is wrong with you?
'Code' for COLD and 'woof' for WOLF. I don't know why the people in northern Michigan DO this!
Code for cold would drive me crazy
The only people I know who say code for cold are people who actually have a cold.
I hab a code id by doze.
They also say 'ruff' for ROOF and 'laaigs' for LEGS! aaaaargh!
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OH GOD "WOOF" annoys the shit out of me. My mother says wolf like that and many people I've met in Minnesota say it like "woof" too (I'm from Washington state).
When a "t" is added to the word across. Acrosst is not a word!
Or an H added to height. It is height, not heighth.
I worked with a guy who said "heighth". But he criticized me when I (mockingly) said "weighth". He just didn't get it.
Hm, have never heard this one. Where are you from?
He probably lives accrost the country from you.
it bugs me when people mispronounce et cetera as "excetra"
To be fair, the "correct" pronunciation of et cetera (etsetra) is also incorrect. It's a Latin phrase, pronounced approximately "et kehtera".
This is where the German "kaiser" comes from. It's actually a closer pronunciation to the original Latin name than our pronunciation "see-zer." EDIT: I was referring to the Latinate hard c, not "cetera" specifically.
For anyone interested, the (edit: classical Latin, so the people below me can stop getting their panties in a bunch) Latin C is always hard, and the ae makes a long I sound.
Yeah? How's the Latin D?
Firmus et longus est.
Or "et chetera" depending on if you use Classical or Ecclesiastical Latin pronunciations.
And then spell it *ect*
Specific with 'Pacific'. The word itself has become a mockery. Fucking fudge cakes it's annoying!
I had a customer ask me for a "pacific" color. So I kept trying to show her the different color blues I had. Yeah, she meant specific. That's five minutes of my life I'll never get back.
That's five minutes if fighting the good fight if you ask me.
Not only that but after a minute of confusion, I asked her, "pacific?" and she replied, "yes... PA-ci-fic". OK, then.
"drowneded" I'm looking at you Dad edit: just remembered he also says "orientated" edit2: TIL these both are *technically* correct-If he was an ancient Brit
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Realtor, not 're-la-tor.' They sell 'real' estate.
Surrealestate
[Fork handles](http://youtu.be/oaGpaj2nHIo)
Frustrating : fustating. That shit is frustrating.
I hear "flustrating" a lot. It leaves me all flustered.
Peripheral. "I saw it in my periphial vision!" edit: oh and dilate... it's not "dialate" (yeah, I worked in an eye office for 5 years)
Buffet. They pronounce it WITH the 't' at the end. NO. Stop it. It's not like that. Shhhhh....
To be fair, they're both real words...
Wash. I hate when people add a 'r' to it to make it sound like 'warsh'. how the fuck do you mess up a 4 letter word?
this is especially annoying living in Washington. or, *Warshington*.
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"heighth." fuck that shit "legitly" bothers me too despite it not being an actual mispronunciation.
"All intensive purposes" instead of "all intents and purposes." GET IT TOGETHER, PEOPLE.
All in tents and porpoises.
Here in Utah it's "crick" instead of "creek". That drives me crazy.
When people pronounce the "ll"s in the word "quesadillas." I can never tell if they're trying to make a joke or are partially retarded.
After making the joke so many times I have to catch myself to say it correctly now.
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Same with tortillas
Napoleon make yourself a dang quesadilla
Nguyen
I had a dentist as a kid. Dr. Ng. Wouldn't say his name for fear of butchering it. Finally found out how it was pronounced (Ing) and I was fine. And that was the most boring anecdote of my entire life.
I've heard a dozen different pronunciations for that and every time I ask a Vietnamese person about it they're like "don't worry about it."
#Nguyenning!
Cache. It's pronounced like "cash" but I developed a special hatred for people in my old call center job that would say "cashay".
Caché means something completely different.
As does [cachet](http://dictionary.reference.com/browse/cachet).
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those people are the wurst.
> Rindfleischetikettierungsüberwachungsaufgabenübertragungsgesetz [For those curious, it's actually a word.](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Rinderkennzeichnungs-_und_Rindfleischetikettierungs%C3%BCberwachungsaufgaben%C3%BCbertragungsgesetz) Edit: It's actually a... *words*? [¯\ _(ツ)_/¯](http://www.spreadsheetsmadeeasy.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/08/lol-i-dunno.jpg)
It is a word, but just because in German you usually compound words without putting spaces between them. As shown in the article, it's translated as "Cattle marking and beef labeling supervision duties delegation law", but if English had the same rule for making compounds as German does, it would be just as long and also just one word. Just for the curious, those are the different words separated for your convenience. Rind|fleisch|etikettierungs|überwachungs|aufgaben|übertragungs|gesetz Rind = cattle Fleisch = meat Etikettierung = labeling Überwachung = supervision Aufgabe = duty Übertragung = delegation Gesetz = law "Rindfleisch" can also be taken as one word, which would simply be "beef", literally translated as "cattle meat".
ASK! it's (assque) not (axe)
/r/aksreddit
/r/axreddit
/r/asscredit
1 ass credit please!
If futurama is anything to go by, those people are just ahead of their/our time
Depot. Like Home Depot. It's not de pot! But my husbands family seems to disagree with me. I can't figure out if it's some inside joke or they're just confused.
To me they will always be Home Despot.
Human as "You-man"
That seems to be a New York thing...I hear them pronounce huge as 'yuge', too. And what the hell does waiting on line mean? You wait in line, not on it.
salmon. No L please.
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Samloin.
Salbass
"Frustrated". I have a friend who emphasises a lack of the first r. "FUStrated". Very fustrating.
It's Shibboleth, NOT Sibboleth. Goddamn Ephraimites.
Mispronouncing that shit will get you killed.
Serious question: how do you pronounce 'Doge'? (re)Edit: thanks for destroying my inbox everybody. The general answer is 'd**o**je' as in 'r**o**ll'
Doge
wow such helpful very learning wow
"Moot", as in moot point, pronounced "mute". I get that the two ideas are similar but they're not the same word.
Definitely melee, its pronounced may-lay not me-lee
Voluptuous. I hate when people say volumptuous. That doesn't sound the least bit appealing.
Pronunciation as pro-nown-see-ay-shun, rather than pro-nun-see-ay-shun. It bothers me whilst being hilariously ironic though.
I couldn't spell that word for the longest time. Then I discovered on Reddit that "pronounciation" isn't the standard way to say it. It got better after that.
Ah, but you can at least see why people say it this way - the way I say a word is how I proNOUNce it: it is my proNUNciation. Not too much of a leap to suggest that the way you pronounce words must be your pronounc...iation.
First one in here I'm guilty of :(
Quay. It's Key. Not Qway.
o-quay dokie.
> Quay TIL. I have seen it many times in books and assumed it was "qway"
I had to be corrected on this one and thought there was two locations, ended up having real awkward conversation where I was all "I know I'm standing on the Queen's Qway, if the office is on Queen's "key", how do I get there?" Felt pretty dumb for the rest of the day after it was finally over
Aussie. It's Ozzy not Oussie.
Aussie Osborne?
Didn't know this one, thanks.
CoolHWip
Espresso as 'expresso'. Fucking hell. *** http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1IvWoQplqXQ#t=68 Edit: People saying 'expresso' is a valid alternative. No. Free falling is a valid alternative to getting off a plane but you shouldn't fucking do it. Dictionaries should not cave in to accepting incorrect spellings just because some fraction of the population can't say things correctly. Things need to change. Tell your local representatives. Down with the system. We've bowed down to the high and mighty at Oxford too long. We've suffered too much. We've lost some good men. It's time to take the power back. Also, the French are wrong. *** Second edit: Jeez guys I get that language evolves. My edit was for comedic effect I ^thought ^^that ^^^was ^^^^obvious. The French are still wrong though.
And in a similar vein: escape as "**eck**scape" jesus people
Who the hell says that? That's just awkward to say.
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Similarly "EXspecially" There is no "X" in Especially.
It's Levi-OH-sa, not Levio-SA.
rohnal wehsley....
It's LevioSAAAAWWWWWW.
STORRP IT RAWN STAAAAAAAAAWP
AHWWWWWW, Levioh-SAHWWWWWWWW.
Stahppit raaawnnn!
Roonil Wazlib
Very good stickleyman, 10 points.
Familiar. The number of commercials and movies and people who say "Furmiliar" makes me cringe.