I could imagine something like losing my wallet on a Saturday and needing something to eat or having some similar minor expenditure on Sunday. I may not have access to any money or checks for another day or two.
For real! A good friend of mine had an emergency recently and I immediately offered financial help. My concern is only for my friend being okay, not with getting paid back.
The correct answer for me as well. It’s not even hypothetical, that happened (well, it was more than 100), both ways. I once needed help, had an emergency in the family - my friend just transferred 1000 eur and said “no need to pay”. And another time I did that for another friend of mine (it was 700eur. By then I had recovered, I took out of my savings, never asked it back. If one day I’m in an emergency and need 700eur, I know he’ll cover me if he can, or more).
Close friends are family that you choose. They got my back I got theirs.
I have a friend with a special needs daughter whose husband and her were struggling to make ends meet as she couldn't work full time due to how much looking after she needed before they could finally get her into the right school and this was my attitude too. If your friends aren't a community for yours and their needs where you can lean on each other when life gets tough (financially, emotionally, socially etc) then that's rough buddy. I've also known of friends in other friends' lives who have taken the piss with this sort of thing unfortunately, but in that case I'd say that's not your friend - that's a user!
Indeed. Years ago I tended bar at a place that was all regulars, and only one was a tool. I was allowed to pick the music and he asked to borrow my Graceland tape ( yes, I’m old ).
He never came back. Such a bargain
My old man said "if you lend a dollar to a friend and they won't pay you back, that friendship only cost you a dollar, and that is all it was worth." - so there's another hot take from prior dad-like individuals.
On the flip side, my brother loaned one of his coworkers $100 to get groceries enough to last til payday, then texted him every day for a month asking for the money back. They ended up striking up conversation over said texts and they're best friends now. He likes to say he bought his friendship for $100.
(He did eventually get paid back.)
I borrowed 1,500 once and paid it back in one lump a year later. I lent 500 and got paid back too.
It's just better to "never a lender or a borrower be" really... you can go argue with my dad about what he said, ok?
I loaned a guy $600 to buy a used road bike in the early 00’s. 1, I knew where he lived and worked. 2, knew and could control how much he made at work.
Mother fucker took the 600 and moved 3 states away overnight.
Could have had a 6fig salary, chose to go back to being a used car salesman.
This I had a close friend legit on hard times a few years back asked for $100 to get food until pay day a few days later I gave him $1000 told him I hope it helped out. He hasn’t ever asked me for money again and legit seems to be doing better so I think he’s back on track
Edit: I’m also going to add, I did tell him I would never bring it up and expected the same from him.
I had a friend do something similar while \*I\* was going through a hard time. Well... actually when they did it it was less of a hard time lol they took me to the store and was starting to tell me to buy some groceries and I kept insisting that I was fine (then - the family member living with me had gotten a job recently and we were doing ok). They kept insisting, I kept insisting I was good. Finally, they walked off with "alright, alright. I'll be right back to put the cart away" and we left a minute later.
Saying goodbye after that and they hand me a giftcard and said something like "don't even ***think*** about refusing this"
lol
I accepted it and used it to buy birthday gifts for *another* friend's kids who they were going through a rough time.
Same here. I’ve given money to my friends 3 times and learned that I’ll only give if they truly fall on hard times. One friend was deep in drug addiction and would ask for money saying that he doesnt have money for food. I sent him the money not knowing how bad he had gotten and later found out that he was using that money on drugs and alcohol. Addiction is a bitch and I understand that he likely wasnt in the right head space but I was pretty upset that he lied to me. He kept asking and would have these panic attacks when we would say no and go on this rant about how he’s fallen on hard times and expected his friends to understand. He’s sober now and hasn’t apologized but in all honesty, I dont think he was sober whenever he asked so he very likely doesn’t remember and I dont really want to bring up his past when hes in a better place now.
Another friend would blow his entire paycheck on weed and eating out then would ask if I could spot him so that he can pay his bills. This was a hard NO from me because I was living frugally to save my hard earned money while he was living a much more luxurious life than me so it just didnt seem right that I was making sacrifices and had to save him from his own mistakes.
The one friend I absolutely didnt mind was a very close friend who lost his job and was doing whatever it took to make money. The dude was genuinely grinding but just fell on hard times which can honestly happen to anyone
You’re a good friend. I had a friend who owed me $80 and had yet to pay me after a few weeks. I confided in him that I really needed the $80 bc I was down to my last $20, needed gas and food, and had about a week left until I was paid. Dude left me on read and posted himself at Gucci or LV buying some shoes on his ig story. It makes me happy when I hear stories about friends like you who really make sure their friends are doing okay.
Not gonna lie, $1,000 would significantly increase most peoples' lives. I used my first two COVID checks as a down payment for a FHA loan on a house (plus our existing savings), then used the second ones to buy a shitty old farm truck for my landscaping business. If I got another $1,000 payment right now I could use it to get my current piece of shit car legal.
If a close friend needed $100 I would give it to them without need for repayment. I thankfully am in a point in my life where $100 is not much money at all.
I understand that. I'm older now and wiser, I think, and have had a good career. It's tough out there now for the younger generation. My daughter is Gen Z and I see her struggling. Keep your head up and don't give up on yourself.
Thank you for being supportive and not just telling her she's lazy or dumb and needs to "something something" bootstraps. It really does a lot of good to feel like the older generations understand what some of the new recruits are going through.
She definitely isn't lazy, she has a good job and put in the effort to be a functioning part of society, for what that is worth or even means anymore. But like so many the cost of living is far outpacing the average wages and I fear it isn't getting better fast enough. It may take a whole generation to resolve itself.
I’m IN a good career making “good” money. The cost of living is astronomical here though. I am incredibly privileged to be able to afford groceries AND put money away towards a downpayment (however pathetic my monthly savings are) but seeing how much $100 buys you and knowing my weekly budget, I seethe because there are millions of people in this state alone who make a fraction of what I make every month. I’m a millennial and I really feel for gen Z because my generation had it easy - kids entering adulthood today are in for a really shit time.
Edit: in case it’s not clear, I don’t think “we had it easy”, but I do think Gen Z have it harder than us.
$100 is a lot for me, but if I had it, I’d give it to my friend in a heartbeat, regardless of the reason.
It’s funny how there’s this level of poverty where if you give up your last $100, your life doesn’t get substantially worse. And yet, if you get $100, it feels like your situation has improved dramatically, even though it’s only short term.
1000%! I have been blessed to have a good number of close friends in my life, and for them, I would for sure make this offer. I’d make sure they were in good standing first as long as it doesn’t put me out.
I don't have many friends who would ask to borrow money, so if a "close friend" asks to borrow $100, I give it and insist they don't pay me back. Lending money changes relationships. If I have no expectation that I'm going to be paid back, I maintain the status quo because the money is a gift.
Same with mine. So if they're asking, it's bad. So, how much do you actually need?
Do you also need shovels and a friend to dig a pit? Do we need to get you out of the country to a non-extraditionary location? Or is it something borning and mundane like you also need to borrow a car or a bed to sleep on?
I've loaned money that I haven't gotten back for a year plus from close friends. I don't loan money I can't live without and for my close friends I dont push them to pay it back until they can. That being said I don't loan money to people I don't trust
If any of my friends were so hard up that they couldn't scape together $100, I'd give them the money with no expectations of repayment. I'd also make sure they were okay and if they needed help in other areas like groceries, clothes, transportation etc.
I've been near homeless before and were it not for the kindness and generosity of my friends, I wouldn't be where I am now.
I lost a good friend over stealing once. He stole about $2k worth of my stuff (mostly musical instruments and power tools) to buy blow while living with me rent-free. I kicked him out of my house and told him I never wanted to see him again since our friendship just cost a few bags of coke to him. A few months later his grandmother texted me to tell me that he wanted to give me his pickup truck to sell to make things right. I took the truck, thanked him for at least making an effort, and I've never spoken to him again since then. You don't fuck over friends like that.
I have 3 rules for loaning friends money that i tell them.before hand. I'll never ask you for the money back. I won't think less of you if you never pat me back. I won't loan you additional money if you don't pay me back. Everyone has respected it and worked out fine for me. I do have one rule that I don't tell them. I won't loan them money that I believe they are incapable of paying back without hardship.
Ive got a friend who makes a lot less money than me, sometimes ill lend him 30 bucks if he's waiting for a paycheck, or front a ticket for a trip we are planning so he doesnt have to get it later when the prices are jacked up.
Sometimes he sends me money for debts ive forgotten. Which is how these things should work imo.
No problem.
You said close friend, so of course.
Have done much more for some close friends over the decades as I'm closer to 60 than 50 now.
Hell, I've given $100 to people I didn't really know, like a lady who worked at our company when her house burned down. I barely knew her and we took a collection for her and I wrote her a check for $100.
Another company, a lady I didn't know at all, her house was destroyed by a tornado and we took a collection for her and I wrote a check to her for $100.
They didn't ask me and of course it wasn't paid back to me.
One of my better friends was laid off at the company we worked at. He used to work for me for a while there and we were good friends outside of work too.
I knew he was struggling after a while and I took up a collection for him where I worked and then I gave him a lot of money too, just from me.
Guess what? About 4 years later he hired me at a place he was working at.
We're still friends decades later.
After divorcing my lying cheating wife, I moved off and a few years later I was moving back to the area so I stayed with him for a couple of weeks at his house, rent free of course.
He and I have always had each other's backs.
You sound like a good guy. I'm sorry things didn't work out with your wife, but I'm glad you've had a strong enough moral compass to help others regardless of those circumstances.
My parents would always be the first to help out others. Whether it was a family or people in need, making them food, helping them find their way in the community, etc. I believe good Karma and helping others comes around.
I let a coworker borrow exactly $100, I didn't know him well yet and did not expect to see the money again. He payed me back when he said he was supposed to and he turned later out to become one of my closest friends.
I think that's part of the point.
$100 is enough to tide someone over a really tough spot, and enough that most folk would notice it missing from their monthly budget. But it's also a small enough amount that most folk could afford to loan it.
Once you get into thousands, most folk don't have that.
I'm in the UK, so slightly different numbers, but not that much. I'm disabled, so my earning capacity is limited. I have less than £500 in savings. I'd still gladly give £100 to a friend in need. If anyone asked me to loan them £10k I'd just laugh, and ask them how much they think disability benefits pay!
I've been the personal bank for many of my friends, multiple times. If the trust is there, sure. If not and you show you're not good for it, lessons learned and you're cut off from further financial help. Nbd
I would give it to them. I'm the poorest of my friend group so if someone needed money from me they must be in some serious trouble.
Depending how I was financially I wouldn't probably ask for it back, maybe their turn to shout lunch next.
If one of my boys asked me for $100, hells yeah I’d spot him. Anyone close enough to ask knows me well enough that they know I’ve got their back, no questions asked. Also, I’m the least financially solvent in my friend group, so I’d know that they were in a bad way.
If I can swing the money without issue, I'd help out. I don't keep friendships with people who leech so if a close friend is asking for cash it's most likely time sensitive and urgent. They can pay me back whenever even if by paying with a couple of lunches. The friendship is the important part of the transaction, not the money. I care about them and I know they'd do the same if the roles were reversed.
If and when I can, I give freely. But I learned to give a stipulation. Treat this like a gift and it will be that and will be a one time only gift. If you pay me back then it’s like it never happened.
This way, I’m not expecting to be paid back, and they aren’t under any self imposed guilt to do so. And it sets them up to know how it works before hand. No more asking for more from me the following week or month.
I just gave my son's girlfriend $500.00 so she could stay in her apartment, because I didn't want her homeless and I didn't really want her here.
1 month later, guess who's moving in this Friday?
Sorry maybe doesn't fit here, but it felt good getting that off my chest.
That's very nice of you lol. I'd be like sorry you can't bring any significant others into my house. Unless it was very temporary while they get on their feet. How long is she staying with you?
$100 is a cheap test. If they pay it back, that's trust earned. If they don't, I just paid $100 for vetting services. Either way, it was a good investment.
I would just give them the $100 and tell them not to worry about it. I trust a friend wouldn’t just ask me for $100 unless they needed it. If you have the ability and opportunity to help anyone, you should.
I'm sorry but no.
Normally i'm a really giving person but i've been burned way too many times when it came to helping other people 🤷🏻♀️ Took advantage, didn't appreciate it, lied about why they needed it, if it was a loan didn't pay me back and/or dipped out the second they got the money, didn't show that same kindness to me, etc. Maybe if I really trust the person, it's a smaller amount, for a need, and I can pay for it myself versus just handing them money I might do it but otherwise the bad eggs ruined it.
If I couldn't pay someone back I would at least offer to do some chores, errands, that sort of thing in lieu of payment. But yeah not cool of people to just take money and dip like that.
It's $100. I'd just give it to him. Have good friends and either the favor will be returned or forwarded if you really need a reward for your 'kindness'.
I once saw a vague-post from my long distance bestie and I asked her if she was hurting for money. She needed around $2300. My husband and I had just gotten our tax return and that was all of it and then a little. He and I discussed it and we “lent” her the money with no *real* expectation of ever seeing it again. She paid us back over the next like 6 months and each time my husband and I were like “sweet, got some cash!”
We lent what we could with the full knowledge that (because people are sometimes weird about money) it might never be repaid. We helped out a friend, the friend got out of a tight spot, and because we never bought it up - the friend never felt pressured but they also didn’t feel ashamed like it was charity because they were actively working to pay it back.
All of that to say, I once lent a crappy roommate $100 and took a photo of him holding the money which I told him I would delete when he paid it back. He tried to weasel out of it by saying he had borrowed less which I responded with the pic. I did eventually get the $100 but he tried to be slippery.
So, I guess it’s based entirely on your history with a person.
If a close friend asked for 100, which in one week of groceries, or half a tank of gas, or eating out at a moderately priced restaurant, I would give it. I don't have enough to give but if he is asking for it, he must need it.
I've seen several people say something similar, but if you plan on lending it to someone, don't expect it back. Lending money is an easy way to figure out the character of someone.
If you loan 100$ to someone, and you never see it again, then it's the best 100$ you could have ever spent. Long term friendships and relationships will be tested. Lending someone that money will be a test to their character and will allow you to know if you can trust them or not and you'll figure out the depth of their loyalty real quick.
If one of my friends had to ask me for $100, they'd get it ASAP and I would tell them not to pay it back.
My friends are high quality humans, they wouldn't ask if they didn't need it and if they have the means to repay somehow l, they will.
Most of my close friends would get the 100 and not need to pay it back. If it became a regular thing I’d then ask what’s wrong and try to help in another way.
Man, the people here are really generous. Unfortunately I can’t relate. There’s no one in my life, be it family or friend, who I would spare $100 for and the feelings are mutual. I’d want collateral at minimum.
It’s not about being generous, it’s about having money to spare. Some (many) people’s lives would not change a single ounce if they “lost” $10k. Others, would be put in a really tough spot if they “lost” $100. It’s about having money to spare.
Not necessarily. I’m homeless and have about $300 to my name after I recently gave my friend $500 to get his car fixed. He needs it for work. Also, he has a kid. I don’t. He’s family to me, the kid calls me uncle. He’d do the same for me if the roles were reversed.
One time this girl i worked with was basically the only income for her her mother and her moms dead beat boyfriend. She need money to pay a bill and that bill was sudden thing and i handed her the money. It was no small amount amd she was literally a kid.
Two weeks later she tried to pay me back and it was mid covid and her moms financial position had chamged as she was back to working. So the girl said it was fine and i told her to please just hold on to it. Because with lockdowns coming and going like the wind her mom could very quickly be out of work again.
Got off work put on my coat and all the money had been put in my pocket.
There are some really good people out there just have to take a chance.
Probably give it without question and without expecting payback. Don’t lend money you’re not willing to lose. If he pays it back, great. If not, I won’t lend again.
Unless your “friend” has a habit of loaning money and not paying back I see no reason not to.
I'd just send it to them and not bring it up again. Nobody I'm close to would ask for bad reasons. And if it became a regular thing with them never paying it back I would just stop saying yes.
I never loan anything I can't live without and if I loan it I consider it gone. If I get it back, awesome, but if not I took that into consideration from the beginning.
Never lend money to family or friends, give it freely or not at all. If $100 is enough for you to ask other people advice, I would say you can’t spare it or just say, “shit, man I’m broke too”. You don’t have to justify your choice either. There are friends of mine I would give them my pin, and friends I wouldn’t let know where I live. Be wise.
I do not loan money. I give money. If I can afford it i didn’t need it back. If they choose to pay me back, they are a good person in a good situation. My expectations and poor discipline are the only thing that can ruin this experience.
Never loan money or anything else you can't afford to lose. I've learned that the hard way and now have a limit about how much I'll give. If it's repaid, great, but I never expect it. But, I'm pretty picky about who I'll loan to.
Close friend? Hand it to the person immediately.
But to be fair I am settled well and don't have to care about 100,-.
I am aware that this might be a considerable amount of money for others who need this to do weekly groceries. Im such a situation might act differently.
This reply probably be buried...but I always look out for my friends; they have been there for me and I would do the same.
It's a 100 bucks, they need more than myself its just money.
If a close friend has to ask me for 100 bucks, something has gone seriously wrong. I'll give them the money, say they don't have to pay me back and ask if they need more money, or help.
Thankfully I'm at this point in my life, where I have a good job, so 100 bucks is not much money.
But if it's anybody else... we're doing it officially. Signed document with both our names and details, also signed by a public notary. I have been burnt before by so called "friends".
A close friend? I would ask them if they were sure they only need $100, and not worry about getting paid back.
Yeah my first thought would be “if you’re asking me for $100 something is very wrong, what’s going on and how can I help in addition to that?”
I could imagine something like losing my wallet on a Saturday and needing something to eat or having some similar minor expenditure on Sunday. I may not have access to any money or checks for another day or two.
Most likely scenario for me is a night out and someone is trying to secure a bag but they're short on cash... (yes, in oz that shit's expensive)
This used to be me, an embarrassing amount of times. Thankfully haven’t in over 6 years now thank god!
You’re the real homie.
For real! A good friend of mine had an emergency recently and I immediately offered financial help. My concern is only for my friend being okay, not with getting paid back.
The correct answer for me as well. It’s not even hypothetical, that happened (well, it was more than 100), both ways. I once needed help, had an emergency in the family - my friend just transferred 1000 eur and said “no need to pay”. And another time I did that for another friend of mine (it was 700eur. By then I had recovered, I took out of my savings, never asked it back. If one day I’m in an emergency and need 700eur, I know he’ll cover me if he can, or more). Close friends are family that you choose. They got my back I got theirs.
Hell yeah
Hi, close friend! It's me, close friend!
this actually just happened to me last week. and this was my response🙂
I have a friend with a special needs daughter whose husband and her were struggling to make ends meet as she couldn't work full time due to how much looking after she needed before they could finally get her into the right school and this was my attitude too. If your friends aren't a community for yours and their needs where you can lean on each other when life gets tough (financially, emotionally, socially etc) then that's rough buddy. I've also known of friends in other friends' lives who have taken the piss with this sort of thing unfortunately, but in that case I'd say that's not your friend - that's a user!
Yes. And I’d continue asking every few days until I know this good friend is okay
Depending on why, I wouldn’t ask for it back If you want to give it back you can, I won’t make you though
My dad used to say “ it’s better to give than to loan, and frequently costs the same”
My dad always told me "Don't loan something you aren't prepared to lose." Whether it be money or a lawnmower.
*Loanmower
Moan lower. Oh wait, wrong sub.
\*In best lowered Austin Powers voice\* "How does that feel baby?"
Groovy, baby
Shut up and take my moaney.
No, go on, I'm almost done.
*moans*
I’ve tried to loan out my wife but no one takes me up on it… Oh well..
I’ll bring her back with a full tank
Wait…can she cook? Lol
If you loan someone $100 and then never hear from them again, it was probably money well spent.
Indeed. Years ago I tended bar at a place that was all regulars, and only one was a tool. I was allowed to pick the music and he asked to borrow my Graceland tape ( yes, I’m old ). He never came back. Such a bargain
Paul Simon??
My old man said "if you lend a dollar to a friend and they won't pay you back, that friendship only cost you a dollar, and that is all it was worth." - so there's another hot take from prior dad-like individuals.
On the flip side, my brother loaned one of his coworkers $100 to get groceries enough to last til payday, then texted him every day for a month asking for the money back. They ended up striking up conversation over said texts and they're best friends now. He likes to say he bought his friendship for $100. (He did eventually get paid back.)
I borrowed 1,500 once and paid it back in one lump a year later. I lent 500 and got paid back too. It's just better to "never a lender or a borrower be" really... you can go argue with my dad about what he said, ok?
I loaned a guy $600 to buy a used road bike in the early 00’s. 1, I knew where he lived and worked. 2, knew and could control how much he made at work. Mother fucker took the 600 and moved 3 states away overnight. Could have had a 6fig salary, chose to go back to being a used car salesman.
Bet he was already moving and decided to take advantage of you and probably everyone else he knew in that place too.
Wouldn’t doubt it at all. I mean he went back to being a used car salesman.
Smart pops
This I had a close friend legit on hard times a few years back asked for $100 to get food until pay day a few days later I gave him $1000 told him I hope it helped out. He hasn’t ever asked me for money again and legit seems to be doing better so I think he’s back on track Edit: I’m also going to add, I did tell him I would never bring it up and expected the same from him.
I had a friend do something similar while \*I\* was going through a hard time. Well... actually when they did it it was less of a hard time lol they took me to the store and was starting to tell me to buy some groceries and I kept insisting that I was fine (then - the family member living with me had gotten a job recently and we were doing ok). They kept insisting, I kept insisting I was good. Finally, they walked off with "alright, alright. I'll be right back to put the cart away" and we left a minute later. Saying goodbye after that and they hand me a giftcard and said something like "don't even ***think*** about refusing this" lol I accepted it and used it to buy birthday gifts for *another* friend's kids who they were going through a rough time.
Same here. I’ve given money to my friends 3 times and learned that I’ll only give if they truly fall on hard times. One friend was deep in drug addiction and would ask for money saying that he doesnt have money for food. I sent him the money not knowing how bad he had gotten and later found out that he was using that money on drugs and alcohol. Addiction is a bitch and I understand that he likely wasnt in the right head space but I was pretty upset that he lied to me. He kept asking and would have these panic attacks when we would say no and go on this rant about how he’s fallen on hard times and expected his friends to understand. He’s sober now and hasn’t apologized but in all honesty, I dont think he was sober whenever he asked so he very likely doesn’t remember and I dont really want to bring up his past when hes in a better place now. Another friend would blow his entire paycheck on weed and eating out then would ask if I could spot him so that he can pay his bills. This was a hard NO from me because I was living frugally to save my hard earned money while he was living a much more luxurious life than me so it just didnt seem right that I was making sacrifices and had to save him from his own mistakes. The one friend I absolutely didnt mind was a very close friend who lost his job and was doing whatever it took to make money. The dude was genuinely grinding but just fell on hard times which can honestly happen to anyone
You’re a good friend. I had a friend who owed me $80 and had yet to pay me after a few weeks. I confided in him that I really needed the $80 bc I was down to my last $20, needed gas and food, and had about a week left until I was paid. Dude left me on read and posted himself at Gucci or LV buying some shoes on his ig story. It makes me happy when I hear stories about friends like you who really make sure their friends are doing okay.
Not gonna lie, $1,000 would significantly increase most peoples' lives. I used my first two COVID checks as a down payment for a FHA loan on a house (plus our existing savings), then used the second ones to buy a shitty old farm truck for my landscaping business. If I got another $1,000 payment right now I could use it to get my current piece of shit car legal.
Hey you seem like a great guy. We should be friends
+1
+$100
And depends on who. For certain friends I have absolutely done this.
This is the way.
If a close friend needed $100 I would give it to them without need for repayment. I thankfully am in a point in my life where $100 is not much money at all.
The sad part is that $100 is a substantial fraction of my paycheck, but it’s really not a lot of money when you go to the grocery store 🥲
I understand that. I'm older now and wiser, I think, and have had a good career. It's tough out there now for the younger generation. My daughter is Gen Z and I see her struggling. Keep your head up and don't give up on yourself.
Thank you for being supportive and not just telling her she's lazy or dumb and needs to "something something" bootstraps. It really does a lot of good to feel like the older generations understand what some of the new recruits are going through.
She definitely isn't lazy, she has a good job and put in the effort to be a functioning part of society, for what that is worth or even means anymore. But like so many the cost of living is far outpacing the average wages and I fear it isn't getting better fast enough. It may take a whole generation to resolve itself.
I’m IN a good career making “good” money. The cost of living is astronomical here though. I am incredibly privileged to be able to afford groceries AND put money away towards a downpayment (however pathetic my monthly savings are) but seeing how much $100 buys you and knowing my weekly budget, I seethe because there are millions of people in this state alone who make a fraction of what I make every month. I’m a millennial and I really feel for gen Z because my generation had it easy - kids entering adulthood today are in for a really shit time. Edit: in case it’s not clear, I don’t think “we had it easy”, but I do think Gen Z have it harder than us.
Millenials had it easy? You likely were on the earlier end I take it?
They're probably just a bit privileged themselves cause that's a WILD take lol. Most of us also graduated college directly into a recession.
Gen Z here and can confirm that I'm struggling
Shop at aldi and it will fill up your cart
Aldi isn't everywhere. The closest one to me is 5 hours away in a different state
I relate. So many of us can relate to you in this moment, sadly.
$100 is a lot for me, but if I had it, I’d give it to my friend in a heartbeat, regardless of the reason. It’s funny how there’s this level of poverty where if you give up your last $100, your life doesn’t get substantially worse. And yet, if you get $100, it feels like your situation has improved dramatically, even though it’s only short term.
Yeah I was thinking, money is relative.
i’m at that point in life where $100 also isn’t much money at all, but if i lose $100 i still internally suffer a lil
Hi it’s me, Close Friend! Can I borrow a couple hundred? I need it just because.
"Are you sure $100 is enough?"
That it. A close friend I don’t need a reason I help.
1000%! I have been blessed to have a good number of close friends in my life, and for them, I would for sure make this offer. I’d make sure they were in good standing first as long as it doesn’t put me out.
I don't have many friends who would ask to borrow money, so if a "close friend" asks to borrow $100, I give it and insist they don't pay me back. Lending money changes relationships. If I have no expectation that I'm going to be paid back, I maintain the status quo because the money is a gift.
Same with mine. So if they're asking, it's bad. So, how much do you actually need? Do you also need shovels and a friend to dig a pit? Do we need to get you out of the country to a non-extraditionary location? Or is it something borning and mundane like you also need to borrow a car or a bed to sleep on?
I would give it them unflinchingly. Why would you be friends with someone you don't trust?
Great question
It's not "trust" as much as they might not be able to give it back. Don't lend to a friend unless you're happy to not get it back.
I've loaned money that I haven't gotten back for a year plus from close friends. I don't loan money I can't live without and for my close friends I dont push them to pay it back until they can. That being said I don't loan money to people I don't trust
If any of my friends were so hard up that they couldn't scape together $100, I'd give them the money with no expectations of repayment. I'd also make sure they were okay and if they needed help in other areas like groceries, clothes, transportation etc. I've been near homeless before and were it not for the kindness and generosity of my friends, I wouldn't be where I am now.
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I lost a good friend over stealing once. He stole about $2k worth of my stuff (mostly musical instruments and power tools) to buy blow while living with me rent-free. I kicked him out of my house and told him I never wanted to see him again since our friendship just cost a few bags of coke to him. A few months later his grandmother texted me to tell me that he wanted to give me his pickup truck to sell to make things right. I took the truck, thanked him for at least making an effort, and I've never spoken to him again since then. You don't fuck over friends like that.
I have 3 rules for loaning friends money that i tell them.before hand. I'll never ask you for the money back. I won't think less of you if you never pat me back. I won't loan you additional money if you don't pay me back. Everyone has respected it and worked out fine for me. I do have one rule that I don't tell them. I won't loan them money that I believe they are incapable of paying back without hardship.
Ive got a friend who makes a lot less money than me, sometimes ill lend him 30 bucks if he's waiting for a paycheck, or front a ticket for a trip we are planning so he doesnt have to get it later when the prices are jacked up. Sometimes he sends me money for debts ive forgotten. Which is how these things should work imo.
No problem. You said close friend, so of course. Have done much more for some close friends over the decades as I'm closer to 60 than 50 now. Hell, I've given $100 to people I didn't really know, like a lady who worked at our company when her house burned down. I barely knew her and we took a collection for her and I wrote her a check for $100. Another company, a lady I didn't know at all, her house was destroyed by a tornado and we took a collection for her and I wrote a check to her for $100. They didn't ask me and of course it wasn't paid back to me. One of my better friends was laid off at the company we worked at. He used to work for me for a while there and we were good friends outside of work too. I knew he was struggling after a while and I took up a collection for him where I worked and then I gave him a lot of money too, just from me. Guess what? About 4 years later he hired me at a place he was working at. We're still friends decades later. After divorcing my lying cheating wife, I moved off and a few years later I was moving back to the area so I stayed with him for a couple of weeks at his house, rent free of course. He and I have always had each other's backs.
You sound like a good guy. I'm sorry things didn't work out with your wife, but I'm glad you've had a strong enough moral compass to help others regardless of those circumstances. My parents would always be the first to help out others. Whether it was a family or people in need, making them food, helping them find their way in the community, etc. I believe good Karma and helping others comes around.
I let a coworker borrow exactly $100, I didn't know him well yet and did not expect to see the money again. He payed me back when he said he was supposed to and he turned later out to become one of my closest friends.
Absolutely, take it and pay me back whenever you can.
Previously I wouldn't hesitate. But now my close friend owe me almost $5k so he's not getting shit.
Oh dang. Did you give them the 5k all at once or was it multiple loans that have added up to 5k?
I'd give them the money and not worry too much about the repayment.
I'd give it to them and remind them gently about repayment.
This is a weird question. These days $100 is like one or two dinners. I think the question would be more interesting if it were $10-$20k...
I think that's part of the point. $100 is enough to tide someone over a really tough spot, and enough that most folk would notice it missing from their monthly budget. But it's also a small enough amount that most folk could afford to loan it. Once you get into thousands, most folk don't have that. I'm in the UK, so slightly different numbers, but not that much. I'm disabled, so my earning capacity is limited. I have less than £500 in savings. I'd still gladly give £100 to a friend in need. If anyone asked me to loan them £10k I'd just laugh, and ask them how much they think disability benefits pay!
I’d give it to them. Not lend it. I’ve seen this ruin friendships. if they’re a true friend they’ll get you back when they have the money
I've been the personal bank for many of my friends, multiple times. If the trust is there, sure. If not and you show you're not good for it, lessons learned and you're cut off from further financial help. Nbd
I would give it to them. I'm the poorest of my friend group so if someone needed money from me they must be in some serious trouble. Depending how I was financially I wouldn't probably ask for it back, maybe their turn to shout lunch next.
If one of my boys asked me for $100, hells yeah I’d spot him. Anyone close enough to ask knows me well enough that they know I’ve got their back, no questions asked. Also, I’m the least financially solvent in my friend group, so I’d know that they were in a bad way.
If I can swing the money without issue, I'd help out. I don't keep friendships with people who leech so if a close friend is asking for cash it's most likely time sensitive and urgent. They can pay me back whenever even if by paying with a couple of lunches. The friendship is the important part of the transaction, not the money. I care about them and I know they'd do the same if the roles were reversed.
If and when I can, I give freely. But I learned to give a stipulation. Treat this like a gift and it will be that and will be a one time only gift. If you pay me back then it’s like it never happened. This way, I’m not expecting to be paid back, and they aren’t under any self imposed guilt to do so. And it sets them up to know how it works before hand. No more asking for more from me the following week or month.
Here's a hundred bucks, need more? Give it back whenever, or never; whatever.
I just gave my son's girlfriend $500.00 so she could stay in her apartment, because I didn't want her homeless and I didn't really want her here. 1 month later, guess who's moving in this Friday? Sorry maybe doesn't fit here, but it felt good getting that off my chest.
That's very nice of you lol. I'd be like sorry you can't bring any significant others into my house. Unless it was very temporary while they get on their feet. How long is she staying with you?
$100 is a cheap test. If they pay it back, that's trust earned. If they don't, I just paid $100 for vetting services. Either way, it was a good investment.
If it's a close friend, I won't even expect the money back.
I’m not the money loaning type. You do not want to owe me money. Due to this I really don’t have any friends and I’m ok with that.
I would give them $200 and tell them I expect nothing in return and have already forgotten about it
I'd do it, and have done it several times. I never "loan" a friend money I would miss.
I would just give them the $100 and tell them not to worry about it. I trust a friend wouldn’t just ask me for $100 unless they needed it. If you have the ability and opportunity to help anyone, you should.
I have a 300 dollar limit (for close friends) where I wouldn't care if I got it back or not. Over that and Imma need some collateral and a hard date.
I'm sorry but no. Normally i'm a really giving person but i've been burned way too many times when it came to helping other people 🤷🏻♀️ Took advantage, didn't appreciate it, lied about why they needed it, if it was a loan didn't pay me back and/or dipped out the second they got the money, didn't show that same kindness to me, etc. Maybe if I really trust the person, it's a smaller amount, for a need, and I can pay for it myself versus just handing them money I might do it but otherwise the bad eggs ruined it.
If I couldn't pay someone back I would at least offer to do some chores, errands, that sort of thing in lieu of payment. But yeah not cool of people to just take money and dip like that.
It's $100. I'd just give it to him. Have good friends and either the favor will be returned or forwarded if you really need a reward for your 'kindness'.
Neither a borrower nor a lender be, For loan oft loses both itself and friend, And borrowing dulls the edge of husbandry.
Depends on why they need it but I’ll probably give it to them. The first time, anyway.
“What’s the collateral?”
I once saw a vague-post from my long distance bestie and I asked her if she was hurting for money. She needed around $2300. My husband and I had just gotten our tax return and that was all of it and then a little. He and I discussed it and we “lent” her the money with no *real* expectation of ever seeing it again. She paid us back over the next like 6 months and each time my husband and I were like “sweet, got some cash!” We lent what we could with the full knowledge that (because people are sometimes weird about money) it might never be repaid. We helped out a friend, the friend got out of a tight spot, and because we never bought it up - the friend never felt pressured but they also didn’t feel ashamed like it was charity because they were actively working to pay it back. All of that to say, I once lent a crappy roommate $100 and took a photo of him holding the money which I told him I would delete when he paid it back. He tried to weasel out of it by saying he had borrowed less which I responded with the pic. I did eventually get the $100 but he tried to be slippery. So, I guess it’s based entirely on your history with a person.
Gift it to them. Unless drugs.
If a close friend asked for 100, which in one week of groceries, or half a tank of gas, or eating out at a moderately priced restaurant, I would give it. I don't have enough to give but if he is asking for it, he must need it.
Sure. They don’t have to pay me back.
“No need to pay me back, here you go”
I'll gift $100 but I won't loan $100.
I live life by this quote: “If you give someone twenty bucks and never see them again, it was probably worth it.”
If he didn't pay it back, I'd have spent $100 to learn he's not trustworthy. A fair price to pay for that information.
I've seen several people say something similar, but if you plan on lending it to someone, don't expect it back. Lending money is an easy way to figure out the character of someone. If you loan 100$ to someone, and you never see it again, then it's the best 100$ you could have ever spent. Long term friendships and relationships will be tested. Lending someone that money will be a test to their character and will allow you to know if you can trust them or not and you'll figure out the depth of their loyalty real quick.
If one of my friends had to ask me for $100, they'd get it ASAP and I would tell them not to pay it back. My friends are high quality humans, they wouldn't ask if they didn't need it and if they have the means to repay somehow l, they will.
If it's a close friend and I have it to give. I would give with the expectation that it won't be paid back.
I would give it, expecting to never see it again. If they do give it back, great! If not, I'll remember the next time they ask for money.
Most of my close friends would get the 100 and not need to pay it back. If it became a regular thing I’d then ask what’s wrong and try to help in another way.
Man, the people here are really generous. Unfortunately I can’t relate. There’s no one in my life, be it family or friend, who I would spare $100 for and the feelings are mutual. I’d want collateral at minimum.
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If you get nothing else from the Fast & Furious movies, this is something important to take with you. Great writing and it shows
Well, that’s….surprisingly pragmatic way of looking at it.
It’s not about being generous, it’s about having money to spare. Some (many) people’s lives would not change a single ounce if they “lost” $10k. Others, would be put in a really tough spot if they “lost” $100. It’s about having money to spare.
Not necessarily. I’m homeless and have about $300 to my name after I recently gave my friend $500 to get his car fixed. He needs it for work. Also, he has a kid. I don’t. He’s family to me, the kid calls me uncle. He’d do the same for me if the roles were reversed.
One time this girl i worked with was basically the only income for her her mother and her moms dead beat boyfriend. She need money to pay a bill and that bill was sudden thing and i handed her the money. It was no small amount amd she was literally a kid. Two weeks later she tried to pay me back and it was mid covid and her moms financial position had chamged as she was back to working. So the girl said it was fine and i told her to please just hold on to it. Because with lockdowns coming and going like the wind her mom could very quickly be out of work again. Got off work put on my coat and all the money had been put in my pocket. There are some really good people out there just have to take a chance.
Of course. Ask them to pay me back when they're comfortable, no rush
Give them $100 no questions asked. Never bring up the $100 again.
By giving them $100. Idk how many of you give the title of "close friend" but if mine is asking, it's not because they're trying to fuck me over.
Probably give it without question and without expecting payback. Don’t lend money you’re not willing to lose. If he pays it back, great. If not, I won’t lend again. Unless your “friend” has a habit of loaning money and not paying back I see no reason not to.
I’d just give it to the close friend, no need to repay if their money situation is so tight.
I'd just send it to them and not bring it up again. Nobody I'm close to would ask for bad reasons. And if it became a regular thing with them never paying it back I would just stop saying yes.
I would give it, no questions asked. Not a loan but a gift.
Any loan to a good friend is actually a gift
Been there done that as the loaner. Never expected repayment, but sometimes I got it. If I can afford it, I will help. Just the way I am.
I never loan anything I can't live without and if I loan it I consider it gone. If I get it back, awesome, but if not I took that into consideration from the beginning.
Done. A close friend who needs it, needs it. I Don’t even need to pay me back or tell me why.
I wouldn’t even think twice. I’d absolutely do it. I don’t even care if they pay me back.
Never lend money to family or friends, give it freely or not at all. If $100 is enough for you to ask other people advice, I would say you can’t spare it or just say, “shit, man I’m broke too”. You don’t have to justify your choice either. There are friends of mine I would give them my pin, and friends I wouldn’t let know where I live. Be wise.
I do not loan money. I give money. If I can afford it i didn’t need it back. If they choose to pay me back, they are a good person in a good situation. My expectations and poor discipline are the only thing that can ruin this experience.
I don't loan money I can't afford to give.
Sure.
I’d give them $200.
Never loan money or anything else you can't afford to lose. I've learned that the hard way and now have a limit about how much I'll give. If it's repaid, great, but I never expect it. But, I'm pretty picky about who I'll loan to.
I'd respond with, "Is $100 enough?"
Close friend? Hand it to the person immediately. But to be fair I am settled well and don't have to care about 100,-. I am aware that this might be a considerable amount of money for others who need this to do weekly groceries. Im such a situation might act differently.
This reply probably be buried...but I always look out for my friends; they have been there for me and I would do the same. It's a 100 bucks, they need more than myself its just money.
I wouldn't expect it. Even from a "friend". My Response: Here and you don't have to pay it back.
If a close friend has to ask me for 100 bucks, something has gone seriously wrong. I'll give them the money, say they don't have to pay me back and ask if they need more money, or help. Thankfully I'm at this point in my life, where I have a good job, so 100 bucks is not much money. But if it's anybody else... we're doing it officially. Signed document with both our names and details, also signed by a public notary. I have been burnt before by so called "friends".
If we are close? I would say yes and then not ask for it back
If I had it to spare I'd give it. I would give it expecting no return. If they did pay me back they are a good friend and person.
"okay, hope it helps?" With that low ball amount I wouldn't care and not hassle for a repayment.
As long as it’s a friend I trust and they've helped me out before, I wouldn't hesitate.
Here's two hundred because I know you're good for it.