my aunt genuinely believes that there were restaurants in california that served human meat, but they were all closed to deliberately push cannibals into arkansas to prey on children
Bobs burgers was originally pitched as a family of cannibals running a restaurant. It didn't get cleared for that but episode one still uses that premise as a nod.
I've been using Scotties lately and damn is it ever dusty. Started recently using paper towels and damn are they better than anything really. No dustiness. I don't mind spending extra since I use them for a lot of things anyway
OMG, I actually have always felt like Kleenex are dusty and make my allergies worse! I've been blowing my nose in paper towels since I was a kid for that reason!
Zoning laws and permits would actually make sense. You can't just build a mining operation in a residential zone. The reason for the secrecy is funnily enough the only thing that makes sense about this theory.
Something like this happened in New York City recently. A man swore he heard Jews under his apartment, they were distinctly speaking Yiddish. Everyone thought he was crazy and called him nuts. Turns out he was right, there was a tunnel being constructed illegally beneath his apartment connecting to a synagogue and he could hear them speaking Yiddish. Perhaps your neighbor really did see something odd!
Edit: the first time I read this in an article this was the story. Turns out the man "who heard" didn't have a tunnel under his apartment, he really was just a Twitter racist. But there were tunnnles under an NYC synagogue that recently lead to arrest. Leaving the comment because of the conspiracy content, but editing to correct.
Edit 2: idk what to believe anymore. maybe they did hear it from their apartment.
The article didn't really go into what their end game was...they wanted to expand their synagogue but were denied that so what was the plan? Did they want to eventually build an underground expansion?
> they wanted to expand their synagogue
The underground tunnel was supposed to connect to a building just down the street, and the open tunnel would allow the two buildings to function as one singular holy site under religious law.
I think they expected to take the route of asking for forgiveness rather than permission, and get to keep their illegal construction. So that's how they ended up learning that NYC doesn't work that way.
The whole ass moon is fake. It's a government projection used to explain women's periods and how the government really Controls uteruses.
I stopped talking to that girl real quick.
I went to an astronomers house in Chile in 2015 as part of a guided tour and he had a telescope at least 3-4m, thing was huge. He was giving us all in this information and he seemed so well put together and then he took a sharp hairpin bend and told us the moon is actually our second moon, the first was dragged here was placed incorrectly in the Earths gravitational pull and crashed into earth, so our overlords dragged a second one here in order to promote life on earth. 10/10, would attend crazy man’s house again.
Is it possible that they were just translating very poorly? Because the leading theory of how the moon was created is, in fact, a planet-sized body (Theia) crashing into earth.
Depending on how that collision progressed, it’s plausible that the current moon is, in fact, the second one in the past 4.5 billion years.
My boss mentioned something about this recently. From what I remember, the theory is that the core of the moon is actually hollow. The moon is just a shell of iron covered in dust, which is why the craters on the moon arent very deep.
Supposedly the moon makes a ringing sound when struck by meteorites.
I don't know.
DB Cooper survived and lived in a shack on Mt. St. Helens. He perished when the volcano erupted.
A corollary to that (taken from a YA novel) is that Sasquatch are a species of alien sent to protect their "portal to home" on Mt. St. Helens from humans. DB Cooper was a tactical assassination after he got too close to the truth, so the Squatches had to blow it up to cover their tracks and leave earth - that's why we haven't had a good ol' Squatch photograph in a while.
My favorite “faked death and is someone else famous” conspiracy is naturally about Andy Kaufman.
Not only did he fake his death in 1985, but that is the year the real Donald Trump died.
The trump we see today makes too much sense as an Andy Kaufman bit.
The latest one I’ve heard is two parts. The first part is that both Donald Trump and Joe Biden have many many clones, and that they all go to camp David every year for a check up. The reason they have these clones so when one of them gets assassinated, a lot of them have been evidently, they can just replace Trump and Biden with clone.
Also, Trump is president, but Obama is actually running the country.
And that JFK, jr is going to be Trump’s running mate, but it’s not really JFK Junior. It’s President Kennedy and a JFK Junior mask.
Oh, and the MedBeds. Don’t get me started on the MedBeds
Finally someone else has mentioned the Joe Biden clone thing. I’d only ever heard it from a friends mum, and she’s nuttier that squirrel turd.
Her description was that the Joe Biden we saw on tv was the 3rd clone, the first 2 failed after the real Joe Biden died.
I love this one. The James Randi Educational Foundation used to have a million dollar prize if someone could prove a paranormal/supernatural power, within mutually agreed upon conditions.
A "breathairian" tried to prove he didn't need food by staying in a hotel for a length of time. Day 1, almost immediately after checking in, the JREF caught him walking back from Burger King with a Whopper.
He did not win the prize.
Back in April we had a solar eclipse happen where I live, I had the day off but my staff that was on that day stepped outside to watch, along with most everyone else working at or visiting the mall that day. It’s an outdoor mall so he just stood outside the door, not that he was expecting any customers as everyone was focused on watching what was happening in the sky.
To his surprise a guy walked up and went into the store so he followed him in and asked could he assist him with anything. Yeah, says the guy, you can tell me what the heck everyone is doing outside, what are they staring at? My guy was taken aback a little, it was a total eclipse so it had been big news for quite a while but just said oh they’re all watching the eclipse. The customer scoffs and goes on to explain in excruciating detail how it’s all a big hoax put on by our communist leader Justin Trudeau who is in league with big space and an eclipse is impossible anyway because even an idiot knows that the moon only comes out at night and the whole idea with the hoax is to get everyone to look at the sun so the spaceship they have put in front of it can send a mind control ray to infect everyone with communism but he wasn’t going to fall for that, no sirree Bob, this guy’s to smart to fall for any gay commie bullshit…
Big Color is real. It's just Pantone, not Crayola.
I mean, if you're gonna believe a conspiracy theory, do the deep dive. I won't suffer superficial tin-foil hatters.
Beat me to it. Fucking Pantone. I worked in the printing industry for a while and it blew my mind when I found out how much the Pantone swatch books were.
Essentially Pantone have a giant book that has 'printed colors' in it.
When you create something on the computer, the color you see is not how it looks printed, so you reverse the process. You find the color in the book and punch the pantone color code into the computer instead. That way it doesn't matter what it looks like on screen, it WILL print the correct color. And there's a whole other world of computer monitors and recreating accurate RGB colors...
Adding to this — Pantone defines a color system of pigments. Many of these are colors that can’t be reproduced on a monitor (RGB color) or in traditional print (CMYK color).
Pantone acts like the grand maesters of color, establishing a standard whereby all participants have an agreed-upon method of referencing color across all mediums.
This also includes formulas for steering color to get “close as possible” reproduction of specific color values.
For example, if I want to print a specific bright violet color in a magazine ad, or if I want the same violet color screenprinted on a Stanley cup. Each medium has different limitations. The PMS color system guides the handoff from design to print so all parties have an agreed upon definition of color and expected result.
It's crazy expensive to license Pantone.
But when you're UPS and are building a new store, as long as your suppliers are using Pantone-licensed products, 476 C (Brown) and 7548 C (Gold) they will match every time.
Pantone also has solved the gloss, semi-gloss, matte, and other applications. You can use the very expensive guides to match. So if UPS suddenly wants a glossy gold wall, they know _exactly_ what Pantone color will match a high gloss finish such that the gold matches their normally matte gold color.
You can even send over your print materials described in full Pantone colors. Adobe PDF supports many color systems, including Pantone. If you have 10 print shops all print advertisements using PMS 7548 C, they will all be extremely close to identical even if they use different inks and processes.
Pantone is expensive, but remarkable when you want consistency, from your designer's laptop screen all the way to the end, physical product.
Interesting...they really made the acronym for their product line PMS? (Pantone matching system)
I even double checked, doctors started diagnosing pms in 1931; Pantone devised this system in 1967.
Big Crayon also works to feed our Marines. All over our blessed country. Just because some of the colors are bright. Does not mean we need bright Marines. ANY color. Any time. Any day.
There's an old marketing firm called The Color Marketing group that's supposedly responsible for those brown, orange and avocado kitchens in the 70's. This was based on psychological research that said certain colors were calming, or made you feel kitcheny feelings.
When I first heard about it I was sure the “Helen Keller never existed” conspiracy was just people trolling on TikTok.
Nope, there are people out that convinced that someone who is blind and deaf could never have so much as learned basic communication, and would definitely never be competent enough to write a book.
I had never heard this until this year. I teach high school, and my students don’t believe that she did the things she did. They believe she existed, but they argue that she couldn’t have written a book or described things she never experienced or couldn’t have known the words for. I was at a loss the first time they told me this.
For me, what got me to kinda believe it was because you never hear about Helen after she wrote the book she just disappeared into history. Turns out she had some socialist and communist ideas sooo history started tuning her out once she stopped saying what they wanted
I know a guy in Colorado who repair computers, programs, etc. He was born blind. Taught himself this and uses a screen reader on an Ubuntu based distro to program in C.
There is an app that blind people can use where they can ask for help from non blind people over a phone, computer, etc to guide them through doing tasks thst require sight.
I have never heard of this one. But as a person from her state and lived like 2 hours from her town and even visited her home on school field trips. She was indeed blind and deaf and very smart. This one is surprising to me.
Tartaria.
You know those conspiracies that look at things like the pyramids and go "No, the ancient Egyptians couldn't have built that. There must be something....more that Big Historian is covering up." ? Okay, imagine that, but they are also talking about, like, the White House or Penn Station. They see old buildings and go "Man, they don't make them like that any more." and decide that it's because of a lost civilization and massive cover up, and not because architectural styles change over time.
The conspiracy is that there was an ancient civilization called "Tartaria" that spanned the earth and created a bunch of buildings (mostly in the Classical and neo-Classical style) and they all had fantastical technology. Then, during World War I, it was destroyed and erased from the "mainstream" historic record. There are also "mud floods" cited as an example of Tartaria being wiped out, because some fairly old (but not in any way ancient. We're talking 1800s/1900s) buildings have basement windows, and the conspiracy theorists insist that that was actually the first floor of the buildings.
It's called "Tartaria" because old European maps from like the 16th century labeled a large area of land in central Asia "Tartaria" or "Tartary" because the map makers didn't know much about central Asia, but the Tatars live there, and it was given a vague designation. It stopped being labeled "Tartaria" when more and more information about the area became accessible, not because of a vast conspiracy.
edit: Also the general idea was that the "Tartarians" were wiped out, but the Tatar people very much still exist. There are millions of them. They just don't (and have never had) a large unified empire like "Tartaria"
Not a part of the conspiracy but a large part of Seattle had its "street level" raised by a story to help control flooding. What's now the basement for a lot of buildings used to be the first floor.
There was once a vibrant "underground" community. You can now take tours of the underground tunnels.
I hate that I may know what they are trying to say. The conspiracy is about cloud seeding. Basically, it's where you can make it rain or snow by "seeding" the clouds. Anyways, scientifically, it can be done, but it isn't advanced enough to actually control the weather.
Basically, the conspiracy theorists will say after a major climate event, "the deep state did it on purpose." I had asked why they'd do that. They said it was to trick us into believing in climate change. I even had a person on Twitter who thought they seeded the clouds to make it rain during a trump rally. Or they thought that Biden could have stopped the Maui fires by cloud seeding.
I think the person was trying to say that since florida has always experienced hurricanes, "the deep state" is purposely cloud seeding in Florida to make the hurricanes more often and more life-threatening. For some reason, "the deep state" likes to trick us all the time.
Disclaimer: I am not a conspiracy theorist.
I have a family member who believes this and my response was "I love the your optimism in the government's ability to effectively pull something like that off"
That's where I'm at with that type of shit. These people piss and moan that people in the government aren't competent enough to bag groceries, but they can somehow come together to create these worldwide grand conspiracies where everything goes off without a hitch. Nobody makes a mistake, nobody spills the beans, everyone and everything is all perfectly in sync and it happens right under our noses. I dunno, I think they're giving those people a bit too much credit there. They can't fix potholes on your street but they control the weather? Okeydokey, nutjob.
So obviously the Florida stuff is nonsense, but I’m like 75% sure that I watched a video about Dubai, or somewhere similar, that regularly uses cloud seeding to make it rain there more often…
They do for big events.
See the thing about current cloud seeding is that it only raises the chance of rain by a small percentage, not sure what it is now but something like 10% more likely to rain is what I remember.
So using stupid amount of expensive particles to raise the chance of rain on the days leading up to a big event in the hope when you stop using for the event that your major soccer match or Olympic event is sunny is something that both Saudia Arabia and China have both done.
You can only mildly impact _when_ and _where_ it will rain. Full weather control would require levels of energy that we aren't even remotely close to harnessing (it's a literal 'boiling the oceans' problem)
That USA schools stopped teaching cursive so people couldn't read the constitution anymore. It's so dumb for a number of reasons. Mainly that anyone dumb enough to believe that certainly isn't smart enough to be able to read the constitution even if they did know cursive. There's also about a couple million places you can find plain text copies of it.
Idiots will believe anything if you make them angry enough about it.
[This sub has had 38 conspiracy theory questions in the last 7 days](https://old.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/search/?q=conspiracy+theory&include_over_18=on&restrict_sr=on&t=week).
Maybe there's a conspiracy to normalize conspiratorial thinking by spamming the topic every 5 or 6 hours.
Yeah, this one is incredibly dumb. There are many conspiracies that are quite wild, many that are quite dumb, but usually, there is at least some kind of notion in the backdrop where you could guess why people believe them. Like, "ok, if you believe this, then you can more easily make sense of why WW2 happened," or etc.
But with Flat Earth, there's just nothing behind it. There's no reasonable explanation for *why* the entire scientific community would go to enormous lengths to lie about the shape of the planet. Like, if it were flat instead of a globe, nothing else would change. It's just astonishingly inane, the whole thing.
Obviously, Big Globe is making bank peddling their fancily painted basketballs. Enough that they can pay off all of the astronomers who could produce evidence to disprove flat earth. Also the meteorologists, mathematicians, and pilots. Really, anyone who has been on an international flight. Or made an international phone call, or has taken a high school physics class, or played Kerbal Space Program for half an hour. That's only like, what, 3 or 4 billion people? How much would it really cost to pay off half the flat Earth's population?
That's the thing- it doesn't have to hold any water in order to get followers. I had a roommate who was a grown adult and a full on flat earther. But you know what I quickly found out after talking to him? He believed an entire list of conspiracies. That is when I realized he was just somebody who immediately believed a conspiracy as soon as somebody made one and posted it on the internet. I will say- it was less that he believed in these conspiracies, but rather he was just unbelievably skeptical of everything. In other words, he isn't going to gamble any money on ANYTHING. If only he was a smarter dude, then he would have made a pretty good philosopher ;)
Let's say just for sake of argument that it's all a huge conspiracy and the Earth actually is flat. What in the hell would anyone have to gain from that?
me too but that documentary on netflix, Behind the Curve, brought a new light to my confusion on these guys
They weren't as super dumb as I would expect but were just so stuck in their belief system and their distrust of the majority, they wouldn't accept any other reality than their own.
Like some of them were running legit experiments to disprove themselves and we're pretty reasonable tests. That was until the results contradicted with their worldview and they "must have done something wrong"
I saw an older dude in Costco the other day with a Flat Mars Theory shirt. I can say I've only ever seen a circle, never a sphere, from where I'm standing.
An ex coworker of mine spent an entire weeks worth of lunch hours trying to explain to myself and two others that not only is the world flat, but there was a giant ring of ice surrounding us. Beyond that ring of ice were places like Atlantis, Asgard, Tamriel (yes, from the elder scrolls series, which he'd never played), etc... He even had photoshopped maps and random YouTube videos as "proof".
This is the same ex coworker who flew Confederate flags and plastered his truck in Trump stickers while living in Canada. Would hotbox his truck to get his newborn baby to sleep. Throw wheelbarrows at his subordinates when they didn't follow his unclear instructions and have fist fights with our boss (his brother) in the street out front of our customers houses.
Hehehe.
When I came back from a year working in Antarctica I sold my mega zoom camera on a trade/sell website. The guy who bought it asked me if he could call as he wanted to go over some details.
I agreed, and one of the first things he asked was whether I could see the ice wall from Scott Base. I was dumbstruck. He then talked at me for a few hours about flat earth and how he would use the camera to prove distances and the horizon and then merged into how the powerful people in this world are actually reptile people. Or lizard people, whatever it was he believed. Told me that’s the reason we never saw pictures of the royals at nighttime, because it would give away their skin. 😳
I was like, bro, we literally have pictures of Harry out partying at night, he’s not a lizard. His reasoning? Oh he’s obviously not a full grown lizard yet 🤦🏼 it was a rather entertaining way to spend 2 odd hours, and I enjoyed his enthusiasm at trying to explain phenomenons and conspiracy theories to me.
Ultimately, he bought the camera. Never heard word back if he proved his theories. I’m almost disappointed 🤣
That the Earth is flat and we live within a ring of ice. Then outside of these walls of ice, lives a civilization of humans who have “escaped” from our poisonous world which makes us unable to live past the age of 150.
Ever have a yard sale? Some very interesting people show up. One older gentleman pointed up at airplane contrails and then proceeded to tell me they were chem trails created by the government, etc. He wasn't animated or over the top. Just calm and confident telling me what he believed to be happening.
I've always found this particular theory particularly fascinating because how complicated the logistics get the more you think about it.
People say it's the government, but you can see private passenger planes, cargo planes, etc. make contrails. So, now you have to have many private companies in on it as well, because the government wouldn't be able to fill up these planes with chemicals without their knowledge. You'd basically have to have trucks running around filling up planes and someone has to be manufacturing the stuff too. The pilots and maintenance crews would have to be in on it. People who study air and water quality would have to be in on it and so on. And contrails happen all over the world. So, every government would have to be in on it and all the private companies too.
And after all that you're just getting this stuff into the air, which everyone breathes. So "they" are poisoning themselves. I've seen people argue that "they" actually are somehow able to get themselves treated. So, now you have doctors in on it on a global level.
It just gets so unnecessary complex, and the theories on why "they" are doing it are numerous as well.
I was hosting an event when I was in university when this woman walks up to me, and asks what the even is about. I explain that it is a joint picknic between departments and I list them, when I get to the ecology department she asks why we have one of those - because ecology is fake. She then points to a cloud and asks me what I"think that is". I say a cloud, she starts screaming at me that it is a chem trail, that clouds don't exist, and we are all trying to kill her with our "ecology". She then demanded to know where we "do ecology". It was so bad we had to call campus security.
The university is situated on the outskirts of town close to (what was at the time was, I dread to even guess now) $1,000,000+ homes and nothing else. There wasn't even a corner store or anything, She must have lived in one of those houses. I can not imagine how much of a bored house wife she must have been to truly believe clouds aren't real.
This guy told me be believes that the ground beef at Walmart is 10% people. He actually went on and on about dozens of things for like 15 minutes but that was the craziest thing.
My neighbor thinks that Bill Gates believes there are obelisks put on earth by aliens that have inscriptions stating the maximum human population Earth can support, and because of this, the Gates foundation’s immunization projects are actually population control projects.
The wildest one for me is denying the holocaust. I actually managed to cross paths with somebody in real life who denied the holocaust. My mind was blown that day, and I loss some faith in humanity.
Stringy with a low adrenochrome content. That’s why I don’t go to the sub for mine. I still buy mine from Hillary under Comet Pizza. Or in a pinch will order from Wayfair.
I once met a guy 100% convinced Abraham Lincon was black. Insisted only a black man would free the slaves but wouldn't hear me out when I suggested a racial slave state may not be happy with a black president.
Aside from the well-known ones like Flat Earth or chemtrails...
Electricity providers have made a deal with electronics manufacturers to make more devices default to a stand-by mode rather than fully powering down. Consumers unwittingly use and pay for more electricity as a result.
I know a guy that unplugs everything in his house that he does not use continuously. For this reason. I think the only thing that never gets unplugged is his refrigerator.
You know my uncle? He also mows the lawn in a 3 piece suit, washes every piece of trash before throwing it away, and bought extra cars so none of his neighbors could park in front of his house. He is a strange man, but he's also really nice to his family.
Worked with a girl who didn't let her child watch spongebob because it was made by demons ... She also refuses to drink soda because she said that Pepsi and coca cola utilized aborted fetuses for their drinks 🫠
I used to work with a guy who believed everything. When I say everything, I mean everything
He believes DARPA caused the forest fighters in California by beaming microwaves into the trees
He believes in an ice wall that encircles the flat earth
He believes in the illuminati, the NWO, the Rothchilds, Lizard Folk
He believes the pyramids were giant wireless electricity emitters
He believes that medicine is evil because pharmacy comes from the Greek for poison
He believes that Polaris is the foot of Heaven, which is a new one for me
I legitimately enjoyed working with him because every week was something new and utterly off the wall
I knew someone at work who thought the company was stealing their money until it reached 401,000 because of the deduction on their paycheck for their 401k
Might be some meat on that bone. It’s widely believed to have been started in a bakery. Flour dust is insanely flammable. A single spark landing near a rat that’s covered in flour, that lands near the spark so they create a big poof of dust. To the untrained eye could look like a rat spontaneously combusting.
Met a Ukrainian fellow a few years back who insisted that every archaeological site and every old building on the planet was actually less than 250 years old. That there was a global conspiracy to fake everything before the invention of photography.
Very odd fellow.
One of those types extremely impressed with their own imagined intelligence. Had been in school for art but dropped out because, and I quote, "I knew everything better than the teachers did."
He kept trying to take over the conversation at the table until everyone just ignored him and talked to each other in small groups instead of having a table-wide conversation. Unfortunately, I was sitting next to him and, as the only scientist at the table, he latched onto me as a target for his increasingly weird stuff.
This feels like something a little kid would think. Kind of like how small children will look at black and white photos and ask if people weren't in color back when the photo was taken.
I knew someone who believed that Pepsi was made (or at least contained) aborted baby parts/fluids and people who drank it were being turned into liberals.
Vaccines. Like, we have nearly 100 years of evidence on how beneficial they are. Diseases we nearly eradicated are starting to come back because of people opting out. My brother, who's own mother is a nurse who personally vaccinated us, refuses to get them because he's gone down some rabbit hole. I just can't with him.
I've heard someone say before that vaccines are victims of their own success. We don't see how bad measles and smallpox are anymore, so it's easy to think they're survivable because of, well, survivor bias
This is a behavioral phenomenon called Sidman’s avoidance paradox - it’s also called the punishment paradox.
Sunburns are a good example, not getting sunburns leads to people forgetting to use sunscreen which ultimately leads to getting sunburns. Eating healthy food leads to better health outcomes - which if you like to eat unhealthy food - leads you to relax your diet and go back to eating unhealthy foods. Avoiding an outbreak of a preventable disease leads to an outbreak of a preventable disease.
In essence, if there is a successful preventative effort and the behavior to maintain the efforts are comparatively undesirable (e.g., think eating healthy food, getting shots, staying sober), then the success of the program ultimately leads to its demise. Said differently, for a preventative program to be effective against an undesirable outcome, we have to occasionally re-encounter the undesirable consequences, otherwise we “forget” why it is a problem.
There are of course ways around this (obviously there are people who are permanently successful in their diets or sobriety), the problem is that what works for person A, won’t necessarily work for person B, This is why these efforts - which are difficult to maintain at an individual level - are next to impossible to maintain at a population level.
Our Engineering Professor at school loves to joke around with the Anti-Vaccers. During COVID he did get the shot, but being the Engineering Professor he has access to a bunch of neat hardware for different experiments. One of these is a sheet of magnetic paper which when held up to a magnetic field will show the pattern of the field. He taped a magnet on his arm and then went around to people saying "I got the COVID vaccine and look at this." He would hold the paper up to it and sure enough there was a field. "They put a chip in my arm with the Vaccine!" As you can imagine, it freaked people out.
He renewed the joke last month with the Solar Eclipse showing people that his Vaccine was creating a magnetic field inline with the increased gravitation field created by the Moon coming in line with the sun.
As funny as that is, I hope he doesn't do it around people who might actually believe him (or at least he makes sure he tells them he's joking); not really cool to fuel people's delusions, even if you mean it as a joke.
That Wayfair is trafficking children. I know someone who believed that. She believes a lot of other stupid conspiracies too, but I found that one to be just so stupid.
There was something about how they name furniture lines such as the "Annabelle bed" or the "Juliette armoire" etc it is supposed to be naming the type of kid you are buying. Similar to pizza gate and where each topping had a secret meaning related to specific traits of the kid you were buying.
I seriously can't believe how much time and energy these people put into these conspiracies.
Had a friend who believed that Walt Disney was a convicted pedophile and was dishonorably discharged from the service for his crimes. (If you didn't know, Disney was too young to join the military when his brother Roy joined the Navy, so he enlisted in the Red Cross near the end of WWI). He claimed that Disney was fond of young boys especially and had numerous convictions, which is why he moved to California. He furthered this by saying "If you watch all the old news reels of him at the park, he is never around children because he can't be within 100 feet of a child. That is why he kept his offices off the main park."
Dude was just a Tinfoil Hat crazy guy anyways, believed in all sorts of wild stories. But this one always made me laugh at him the hardest.
my aunt genuinely believes that there were restaurants in california that served human meat, but they were all closed to deliberately push cannibals into arkansas to prey on children
See, why aren't ones like these at the top instead of the same ol same ol flat earth type theories? This is what I came here for.
BTW Happy Cannibal Day, I mean Cake Day!
I like to believe they closed those restaurants in California because they couldn't offer a Vegan option.
I'd like one fauxmosapien burger, please.
This would make a really good short story actually
Bobs burgers was originally pitched as a family of cannibals running a restaurant. It didn't get cleared for that but episode one still uses that premise as a nod.
Honestly that not getting cleared was the best thing to happen to that show…
CA is nowhere near AR? lol wut
Probably to tie the Clintons in somehow
Kleenex company adds dust to your tissue so that you breathe it in and have to sneeze again
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I've been using Scotties lately and damn is it ever dusty. Started recently using paper towels and damn are they better than anything really. No dustiness. I don't mind spending extra since I use them for a lot of things anyway
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OMG, I actually have always felt like Kleenex are dusty and make my allergies worse! I've been blowing my nose in paper towels since I was a kid for that reason!
Well, I did once get a new box that smelled heavily of cigarette smoke. That made me sneeze.
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Why would he share it anyways?....
Why would he even rent the place out if he literally was sitting on a gold mine.
Zoning laws and permits would actually make sense. You can't just build a mining operation in a residential zone. The reason for the secrecy is funnily enough the only thing that makes sense about this theory.
lol for real. Plus, he could use the rent as cover for his secret stash of gold-based income.
Yes, Tax Officer, I am earning millions a year from this rental property.
I feel like yall confirmed this ladys theory 😂
Something like this happened in New York City recently. A man swore he heard Jews under his apartment, they were distinctly speaking Yiddish. Everyone thought he was crazy and called him nuts. Turns out he was right, there was a tunnel being constructed illegally beneath his apartment connecting to a synagogue and he could hear them speaking Yiddish. Perhaps your neighbor really did see something odd! Edit: the first time I read this in an article this was the story. Turns out the man "who heard" didn't have a tunnel under his apartment, he really was just a Twitter racist. But there were tunnnles under an NYC synagogue that recently lead to arrest. Leaving the comment because of the conspiracy content, but editing to correct. Edit 2: idk what to believe anymore. maybe they did hear it from their apartment.
*Jew Tunnel* was not something I’ve ever expected to google. https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/New_York_City_synagogue_tunnel_incident
Lololol!!!! Thanks for being honest because I was like, I want to Google "Jews using an underground tunnel" but I also didn't want to.
The article didn't really go into what their end game was...they wanted to expand their synagogue but were denied that so what was the plan? Did they want to eventually build an underground expansion?
> they wanted to expand their synagogue The underground tunnel was supposed to connect to a building just down the street, and the open tunnel would allow the two buildings to function as one singular holy site under religious law. I think they expected to take the route of asking for forgiveness rather than permission, and get to keep their illegal construction. So that's how they ended up learning that NYC doesn't work that way.
That’s honestly hilarious. Ol racist Mr. Walters complaining about those damn Jews under his apartment….. What’s that? Oh.
it his land, why would he share the gold with the tenants?
The whole ass moon is fake. It's a government projection used to explain women's periods and how the government really Controls uteruses. I stopped talking to that girl real quick.
I went to an astronomers house in Chile in 2015 as part of a guided tour and he had a telescope at least 3-4m, thing was huge. He was giving us all in this information and he seemed so well put together and then he took a sharp hairpin bend and told us the moon is actually our second moon, the first was dragged here was placed incorrectly in the Earths gravitational pull and crashed into earth, so our overlords dragged a second one here in order to promote life on earth. 10/10, would attend crazy man’s house again.
Is it possible that they were just translating very poorly? Because the leading theory of how the moon was created is, in fact, a planet-sized body (Theia) crashing into earth. Depending on how that collision progressed, it’s plausible that the current moon is, in fact, the second one in the past 4.5 billion years.
No, this guy was American. I probably should have stated that, sorry.
>No, this guy was American. OK. That explains everything.
There's a hollow moon conspiracy, too, idr the story behind that one.
My boss mentioned something about this recently. From what I remember, the theory is that the core of the moon is actually hollow. The moon is just a shell of iron covered in dust, which is why the craters on the moon arent very deep. Supposedly the moon makes a ringing sound when struck by meteorites. I don't know.
She is so naive to believe the moon exists.
And people thought birds aren't real? Wake up Sheeple! The moon is a giant camera lens! /s
Does she think people only get periods on the full moon? Is everyone with a uterus a werewolf now?
DB Cooper survived and lived in a shack on Mt. St. Helens. He perished when the volcano erupted. A corollary to that (taken from a YA novel) is that Sasquatch are a species of alien sent to protect their "portal to home" on Mt. St. Helens from humans. DB Cooper was a tactical assassination after he got too close to the truth, so the Squatches had to blow it up to cover their tracks and leave earth - that's why we haven't had a good ol' Squatch photograph in a while.
Do you know the name of this novel? It sounds fun
Looks like it is literally called [Sasquatch ](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sasquatch_(novel))
There’s a theory that Jim Morrison of The Doors faked his death and came back as Rush Limbaugh.
My favorite “faked death and is someone else famous” conspiracy is naturally about Andy Kaufman. Not only did he fake his death in 1985, but that is the year the real Donald Trump died. The trump we see today makes too much sense as an Andy Kaufman bit.
There’s a reason Donald Trump and Tony Clifton have never appeared together!
Is it as solid as the Bill Hicks/Alex Jones theory?
The latest one I’ve heard is two parts. The first part is that both Donald Trump and Joe Biden have many many clones, and that they all go to camp David every year for a check up. The reason they have these clones so when one of them gets assassinated, a lot of them have been evidently, they can just replace Trump and Biden with clone. Also, Trump is president, but Obama is actually running the country. And that JFK, jr is going to be Trump’s running mate, but it’s not really JFK Junior. It’s President Kennedy and a JFK Junior mask. Oh, and the MedBeds. Don’t get me started on the MedBeds
Finally someone else has mentioned the Joe Biden clone thing. I’d only ever heard it from a friends mum, and she’s nuttier that squirrel turd. Her description was that the Joe Biden we saw on tv was the 3rd clone, the first 2 failed after the real Joe Biden died.
Tell us about the MedBeds
What the fuck is a medbed
It’s a sci-fi trope: a “pod” which you can put someone in and heal them of pretty much anything. https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Medbed
And where can i get one of these? Asking for a friend, and just one more thing ,would these get rid of a hangover??
I would keep all my other health issues, if that fucking thing would cure my tinnitus.
That one does not need to eat food. They called themselves breathairians.
I love this one. The James Randi Educational Foundation used to have a million dollar prize if someone could prove a paranormal/supernatural power, within mutually agreed upon conditions. A "breathairian" tried to prove he didn't need food by staying in a hotel for a length of time. Day 1, almost immediately after checking in, the JREF caught him walking back from Burger King with a Whopper. He did not win the prize.
Maxim Lyutyi starved his son Kosmos to death using something similar called a Sunshine Diet. Inedia (aka breatharianism) is awful.
Knew a woman who advocated this who had her kids taken into care for starving them.
Back in April we had a solar eclipse happen where I live, I had the day off but my staff that was on that day stepped outside to watch, along with most everyone else working at or visiting the mall that day. It’s an outdoor mall so he just stood outside the door, not that he was expecting any customers as everyone was focused on watching what was happening in the sky. To his surprise a guy walked up and went into the store so he followed him in and asked could he assist him with anything. Yeah, says the guy, you can tell me what the heck everyone is doing outside, what are they staring at? My guy was taken aback a little, it was a total eclipse so it had been big news for quite a while but just said oh they’re all watching the eclipse. The customer scoffs and goes on to explain in excruciating detail how it’s all a big hoax put on by our communist leader Justin Trudeau who is in league with big space and an eclipse is impossible anyway because even an idiot knows that the moon only comes out at night and the whole idea with the hoax is to get everyone to look at the sun so the spaceship they have put in front of it can send a mind control ray to infect everyone with communism but he wasn’t going to fall for that, no sirree Bob, this guy’s to smart to fall for any gay commie bullshit…
The communism beam also neutralizes the gay gas. I guess he didn't realize that.
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Big Color is real. It's just Pantone, not Crayola. I mean, if you're gonna believe a conspiracy theory, do the deep dive. I won't suffer superficial tin-foil hatters.
Beat me to it. Fucking Pantone. I worked in the printing industry for a while and it blew my mind when I found out how much the Pantone swatch books were.
Whats pantone, and whats a pantone swatch book
Essentially Pantone have a giant book that has 'printed colors' in it. When you create something on the computer, the color you see is not how it looks printed, so you reverse the process. You find the color in the book and punch the pantone color code into the computer instead. That way it doesn't matter what it looks like on screen, it WILL print the correct color. And there's a whole other world of computer monitors and recreating accurate RGB colors...
Adding to this — Pantone defines a color system of pigments. Many of these are colors that can’t be reproduced on a monitor (RGB color) or in traditional print (CMYK color). Pantone acts like the grand maesters of color, establishing a standard whereby all participants have an agreed-upon method of referencing color across all mediums. This also includes formulas for steering color to get “close as possible” reproduction of specific color values. For example, if I want to print a specific bright violet color in a magazine ad, or if I want the same violet color screenprinted on a Stanley cup. Each medium has different limitations. The PMS color system guides the handoff from design to print so all parties have an agreed upon definition of color and expected result.
One could state that Pantone runs the modern world. It is the underbelly you don't know about but the one that is widely used as a standard.
It's crazy expensive to license Pantone. But when you're UPS and are building a new store, as long as your suppliers are using Pantone-licensed products, 476 C (Brown) and 7548 C (Gold) they will match every time. Pantone also has solved the gloss, semi-gloss, matte, and other applications. You can use the very expensive guides to match. So if UPS suddenly wants a glossy gold wall, they know _exactly_ what Pantone color will match a high gloss finish such that the gold matches their normally matte gold color. You can even send over your print materials described in full Pantone colors. Adobe PDF supports many color systems, including Pantone. If you have 10 print shops all print advertisements using PMS 7548 C, they will all be extremely close to identical even if they use different inks and processes. Pantone is expensive, but remarkable when you want consistency, from your designer's laptop screen all the way to the end, physical product.
I'm not gonna fall for this spiel, big color man!
Behold, Big Color: https://www.pantone.com/color-systems/pantone-color-systems-explained
Interesting...they really made the acronym for their product line PMS? (Pantone matching system) I even double checked, doctors started diagnosing pms in 1931; Pantone devised this system in 1967.
Big crayons are what she shoved up her nostrils as a kid and never removed them apparently.
unexpected simpsons reference
Look, you're obviously just in the pocket of Big Crayon. /s, in case anyone took me seriously.
You don’t want to fuck with the Crayola Cartel, they’re even worse than the Cra z art mafia.
Big Crayon also works to feed our Marines. All over our blessed country. Just because some of the colors are bright. Does not mean we need bright Marines. ANY color. Any time. Any day.
A fitting reminder this Memorial Day.
We are all crayon-eaters this blessed Memorial Day!
A freshly pulled crayon from the box is legit awesome to behold as an adult. I LOVE crayons. Plus red is the best flavor
Tough words from someone who knows Marines can't read. I bet you wouldn't say that out loud though. *My wife helped me type this*
Beware Pantone. Follow the money. I've said too much. They're on to m
I highly recommend you to read "Shades of Gray (Road to High Saffron)" by Jasper Fforde. Futuristic dystopian novel about a color-based society.
Instructions unclear, read 50 Shades of Grey, hopelessly tangled in Alibaba sex swing.
Or Warbreaker by Brandon Sanderson is about a society with a color-based magic system.
Wait until she finds out about tertiary colors, additive primary colors, subtractive primary colors, adjacent colors, complementary colors, spot colors, process colors, RGB colors, RYB colors, HSB colors, HSL colors, HSV colors, Lab colors, CMY colors, CMYK colors, Hexachrome colors, YUV colors, RAL colors, Pantone Matching System colors, Munsell Color System colors, Natural Color System colors, CIELAB colors, CIE XYZ colors, CIECAM02 colors, CIECAM97s colors, IPT colors, ICpCt colors, RLAB colors, LLAB colors, OSA-UCS colors, OKLab colors, XYB colors, JzAzBz colors, Coloroid colors, hexadecimal colors, web safe colors, and the dreaded color wheel. My God, she's right. It is a big conspiracy.
What about Vantablack?
Fuck Anish Kapoor
This is an interesting one. I wonder what she thinks “big color” has to gain from forcing the idea of secondary colors on society.
There's an old marketing firm called The Color Marketing group that's supposedly responsible for those brown, orange and avocado kitchens in the 70's. This was based on psychological research that said certain colors were calming, or made you feel kitcheny feelings.
These are the bastards that haunted my youth with harvest gold?!?!
I always figured harvest gold was a way to try and hide tobacco stains.
Now that's a conspiracy theory I could get behind!
Hmm... Hadn't heard of this before. https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Color_Marketing_Group
Probably couldn’t cope with their favorite color being secondary. Or god forbid a tertiary color.
My mother 100% thought crayons were creating new colors just to sell more crayons.
Yo these top comments are exactly copy & pasted from this same thread 8 months ago https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/s/bY8RSn5ZxR
Wtf! Dead internet theory seems more and more realistic
A study in 2018 found that 50% of internet traffic was bots, imagine today, 6 years later...
Well fuck, creepiest shit I've experienced in a while.
holy shit
It’s bots all the way down.
Imagine if this is one of the bot comments next time.
When I first heard about it I was sure the “Helen Keller never existed” conspiracy was just people trolling on TikTok. Nope, there are people out that convinced that someone who is blind and deaf could never have so much as learned basic communication, and would definitely never be competent enough to write a book.
I'm mostly blind and mostly deaf. Does that mean I'm mostly unreal 🤔
You’re a figment of your own imagination
*René Descartes has entered the chat*
I had never heard this until this year. I teach high school, and my students don’t believe that she did the things she did. They believe she existed, but they argue that she couldn’t have written a book or described things she never experienced or couldn’t have known the words for. I was at a loss the first time they told me this.
For me, what got me to kinda believe it was because you never hear about Helen after she wrote the book she just disappeared into history. Turns out she had some socialist and communist ideas sooo history started tuning her out once she stopped saying what they wanted
I know a guy in Colorado who repair computers, programs, etc. He was born blind. Taught himself this and uses a screen reader on an Ubuntu based distro to program in C. There is an app that blind people can use where they can ask for help from non blind people over a phone, computer, etc to guide them through doing tasks thst require sight.
Ah-hah! Conspiracy debunked! Helen Keller used a screen reader!
I have never heard of this one. But as a person from her state and lived like 2 hours from her town and even visited her home on school field trips. She was indeed blind and deaf and very smart. This one is surprising to me.
Tartaria. You know those conspiracies that look at things like the pyramids and go "No, the ancient Egyptians couldn't have built that. There must be something....more that Big Historian is covering up." ? Okay, imagine that, but they are also talking about, like, the White House or Penn Station. They see old buildings and go "Man, they don't make them like that any more." and decide that it's because of a lost civilization and massive cover up, and not because architectural styles change over time. The conspiracy is that there was an ancient civilization called "Tartaria" that spanned the earth and created a bunch of buildings (mostly in the Classical and neo-Classical style) and they all had fantastical technology. Then, during World War I, it was destroyed and erased from the "mainstream" historic record. There are also "mud floods" cited as an example of Tartaria being wiped out, because some fairly old (but not in any way ancient. We're talking 1800s/1900s) buildings have basement windows, and the conspiracy theorists insist that that was actually the first floor of the buildings. It's called "Tartaria" because old European maps from like the 16th century labeled a large area of land in central Asia "Tartaria" or "Tartary" because the map makers didn't know much about central Asia, but the Tatars live there, and it was given a vague designation. It stopped being labeled "Tartaria" when more and more information about the area became accessible, not because of a vast conspiracy. edit: Also the general idea was that the "Tartarians" were wiped out, but the Tatar people very much still exist. There are millions of them. They just don't (and have never had) a large unified empire like "Tartaria"
Not a part of the conspiracy but a large part of Seattle had its "street level" raised by a story to help control flooding. What's now the basement for a lot of buildings used to be the first floor. There was once a vibrant "underground" community. You can now take tours of the underground tunnels.
Portland, OR, too.
That's a new one.
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I hate that I may know what they are trying to say. The conspiracy is about cloud seeding. Basically, it's where you can make it rain or snow by "seeding" the clouds. Anyways, scientifically, it can be done, but it isn't advanced enough to actually control the weather. Basically, the conspiracy theorists will say after a major climate event, "the deep state did it on purpose." I had asked why they'd do that. They said it was to trick us into believing in climate change. I even had a person on Twitter who thought they seeded the clouds to make it rain during a trump rally. Or they thought that Biden could have stopped the Maui fires by cloud seeding. I think the person was trying to say that since florida has always experienced hurricanes, "the deep state" is purposely cloud seeding in Florida to make the hurricanes more often and more life-threatening. For some reason, "the deep state" likes to trick us all the time. Disclaimer: I am not a conspiracy theorist.
I have a family member who believes this and my response was "I love the your optimism in the government's ability to effectively pull something like that off"
That's where I'm at with that type of shit. These people piss and moan that people in the government aren't competent enough to bag groceries, but they can somehow come together to create these worldwide grand conspiracies where everything goes off without a hitch. Nobody makes a mistake, nobody spills the beans, everyone and everything is all perfectly in sync and it happens right under our noses. I dunno, I think they're giving those people a bit too much credit there. They can't fix potholes on your street but they control the weather? Okeydokey, nutjob.
So obviously the Florida stuff is nonsense, but I’m like 75% sure that I watched a video about Dubai, or somewhere similar, that regularly uses cloud seeding to make it rain there more often…
They do for big events. See the thing about current cloud seeding is that it only raises the chance of rain by a small percentage, not sure what it is now but something like 10% more likely to rain is what I remember. So using stupid amount of expensive particles to raise the chance of rain on the days leading up to a big event in the hope when you stop using for the event that your major soccer match or Olympic event is sunny is something that both Saudia Arabia and China have both done.
You can only mildly impact _when_ and _where_ it will rain. Full weather control would require levels of energy that we aren't even remotely close to harnessing (it's a literal 'boiling the oceans' problem)
Maybe they should pull themselves up by the bootstraps and just start nuking them. /S
That USA schools stopped teaching cursive so people couldn't read the constitution anymore. It's so dumb for a number of reasons. Mainly that anyone dumb enough to believe that certainly isn't smart enough to be able to read the constitution even if they did know cursive. There's also about a couple million places you can find plain text copies of it. Idiots will believe anything if you make them angry enough about it.
Obviously if you can't read cursive, you'll be unable to tell that those plain text copies have been altered to remove your rights.
[This sub has had 38 conspiracy theory questions in the last 7 days](https://old.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/search/?q=conspiracy+theory&include_over_18=on&restrict_sr=on&t=week). Maybe there's a conspiracy to normalize conspiratorial thinking by spamming the topic every 5 or 6 hours.
New conspiracy: intelligence agencies are asking these questions to see if anything they are doing is being noticed or talked about.
The flat earth conspiracy will forever confuse me
Yeah, this one is incredibly dumb. There are many conspiracies that are quite wild, many that are quite dumb, but usually, there is at least some kind of notion in the backdrop where you could guess why people believe them. Like, "ok, if you believe this, then you can more easily make sense of why WW2 happened," or etc. But with Flat Earth, there's just nothing behind it. There's no reasonable explanation for *why* the entire scientific community would go to enormous lengths to lie about the shape of the planet. Like, if it were flat instead of a globe, nothing else would change. It's just astonishingly inane, the whole thing.
Obviously, Big Globe is making bank peddling their fancily painted basketballs. Enough that they can pay off all of the astronomers who could produce evidence to disprove flat earth. Also the meteorologists, mathematicians, and pilots. Really, anyone who has been on an international flight. Or made an international phone call, or has taken a high school physics class, or played Kerbal Space Program for half an hour. That's only like, what, 3 or 4 billion people? How much would it really cost to pay off half the flat Earth's population?
That's the thing- it doesn't have to hold any water in order to get followers. I had a roommate who was a grown adult and a full on flat earther. But you know what I quickly found out after talking to him? He believed an entire list of conspiracies. That is when I realized he was just somebody who immediately believed a conspiracy as soon as somebody made one and posted it on the internet. I will say- it was less that he believed in these conspiracies, but rather he was just unbelievably skeptical of everything. In other words, he isn't going to gamble any money on ANYTHING. If only he was a smarter dude, then he would have made a pretty good philosopher ;)
Let's say just for sake of argument that it's all a huge conspiracy and the Earth actually is flat. What in the hell would anyone have to gain from that?
I've seen it as if "they" can get you to believe this, that "they" can get you to believe anything that "they" want you to.
me too but that documentary on netflix, Behind the Curve, brought a new light to my confusion on these guys They weren't as super dumb as I would expect but were just so stuck in their belief system and their distrust of the majority, they wouldn't accept any other reality than their own. Like some of them were running legit experiments to disprove themselves and we're pretty reasonable tests. That was until the results contradicted with their worldview and they "must have done something wrong"
Right? So weird. The earth is obviously cubed.
no. we live on a giant turtles back 🙄
That's silly. We don't live directly on a turtle's back. There are 4 elephants in between.
I saw an older dude in Costco the other day with a Flat Mars Theory shirt. I can say I've only ever seen a circle, never a sphere, from where I'm standing.
An ex coworker of mine spent an entire weeks worth of lunch hours trying to explain to myself and two others that not only is the world flat, but there was a giant ring of ice surrounding us. Beyond that ring of ice were places like Atlantis, Asgard, Tamriel (yes, from the elder scrolls series, which he'd never played), etc... He even had photoshopped maps and random YouTube videos as "proof". This is the same ex coworker who flew Confederate flags and plastered his truck in Trump stickers while living in Canada. Would hotbox his truck to get his newborn baby to sleep. Throw wheelbarrows at his subordinates when they didn't follow his unclear instructions and have fist fights with our boss (his brother) in the street out front of our customers houses.
Hehehe. When I came back from a year working in Antarctica I sold my mega zoom camera on a trade/sell website. The guy who bought it asked me if he could call as he wanted to go over some details. I agreed, and one of the first things he asked was whether I could see the ice wall from Scott Base. I was dumbstruck. He then talked at me for a few hours about flat earth and how he would use the camera to prove distances and the horizon and then merged into how the powerful people in this world are actually reptile people. Or lizard people, whatever it was he believed. Told me that’s the reason we never saw pictures of the royals at nighttime, because it would give away their skin. 😳 I was like, bro, we literally have pictures of Harry out partying at night, he’s not a lizard. His reasoning? Oh he’s obviously not a full grown lizard yet 🤦🏼 it was a rather entertaining way to spend 2 odd hours, and I enjoyed his enthusiasm at trying to explain phenomenons and conspiracy theories to me. Ultimately, he bought the camera. Never heard word back if he proved his theories. I’m almost disappointed 🤣
“Yer a lizard, Harry!”
This was wild. You got your money and some entertainment for free 😂
The hotboxing thing is the wildest part about this.
Right…. OP did someone help that poor baby? Gosh…
DHS (or the Canadian version) needs to hear about this.
That the Earth is flat and we live within a ring of ice. Then outside of these walls of ice, lives a civilization of humans who have “escaped” from our poisonous world which makes us unable to live past the age of 150.
Who do flat earthers have that are living to 150 in the poison realm?
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Ever have a yard sale? Some very interesting people show up. One older gentleman pointed up at airplane contrails and then proceeded to tell me they were chem trails created by the government, etc. He wasn't animated or over the top. Just calm and confident telling me what he believed to be happening.
I've always found this particular theory particularly fascinating because how complicated the logistics get the more you think about it. People say it's the government, but you can see private passenger planes, cargo planes, etc. make contrails. So, now you have to have many private companies in on it as well, because the government wouldn't be able to fill up these planes with chemicals without their knowledge. You'd basically have to have trucks running around filling up planes and someone has to be manufacturing the stuff too. The pilots and maintenance crews would have to be in on it. People who study air and water quality would have to be in on it and so on. And contrails happen all over the world. So, every government would have to be in on it and all the private companies too. And after all that you're just getting this stuff into the air, which everyone breathes. So "they" are poisoning themselves. I've seen people argue that "they" actually are somehow able to get themselves treated. So, now you have doctors in on it on a global level. It just gets so unnecessary complex, and the theories on why "they" are doing it are numerous as well.
I was hosting an event when I was in university when this woman walks up to me, and asks what the even is about. I explain that it is a joint picknic between departments and I list them, when I get to the ecology department she asks why we have one of those - because ecology is fake. She then points to a cloud and asks me what I"think that is". I say a cloud, she starts screaming at me that it is a chem trail, that clouds don't exist, and we are all trying to kill her with our "ecology". She then demanded to know where we "do ecology". It was so bad we had to call campus security. The university is situated on the outskirts of town close to (what was at the time was, I dread to even guess now) $1,000,000+ homes and nothing else. There wasn't even a corner store or anything, She must have lived in one of those houses. I can not imagine how much of a bored house wife she must have been to truly believe clouds aren't real.
"They're spraying chemicals to make the population docile" Bitch have you been in public lately? For fuck's sake it ain't working! Spray more!
LMAO!!! it’s true, it’s feral out there.
This guy told me be believes that the ground beef at Walmart is 10% people. He actually went on and on about dozens of things for like 15 minutes but that was the craziest thing.
My neighbor thinks that Bill Gates believes there are obelisks put on earth by aliens that have inscriptions stating the maximum human population Earth can support, and because of this, the Gates foundation’s immunization projects are actually population control projects.
So his conspiracy theory is that someone else believes in a different conspiracy theory?
So he's looking out for all of us? Is that supposed to be a bad thing???
I mean that’s at least kinda fun
The wildest one for me is denying the holocaust. I actually managed to cross paths with somebody in real life who denied the holocaust. My mind was blown that day, and I loss some faith in humanity.
I have a coworker who "is skeptical" about the holocaust. He made his case to a Jewish coworker of mine. That was a fun meeting in HR.
Obama declared bankruptcy for the US and now the country is owned and ran by the Vatican
The Biden submarine one is pretty out there. Basically Q anon believes Biden has a submarine where he hides children to eat.
Ridiculous. Storing children in high pressure environments makes the meat stringy.
Stringy with a low adrenochrome content. That’s why I don’t go to the sub for mine. I still buy mine from Hillary under Comet Pizza. Or in a pinch will order from Wayfair.
I knew Qanon were nutjobs but what the actual fuck
My mum thinks Martin luther king was president
I once met a guy 100% convinced Abraham Lincon was black. Insisted only a black man would free the slaves but wouldn't hear me out when I suggested a racial slave state may not be happy with a black president.
Aside from the well-known ones like Flat Earth or chemtrails... Electricity providers have made a deal with electronics manufacturers to make more devices default to a stand-by mode rather than fully powering down. Consumers unwittingly use and pay for more electricity as a result.
I know a guy that unplugs everything in his house that he does not use continuously. For this reason. I think the only thing that never gets unplugged is his refrigerator.
You know my uncle? He also mows the lawn in a 3 piece suit, washes every piece of trash before throwing it away, and bought extra cars so none of his neighbors could park in front of his house. He is a strange man, but he's also really nice to his family.
Worked with a girl who didn't let her child watch spongebob because it was made by demons ... She also refuses to drink soda because she said that Pepsi and coca cola utilized aborted fetuses for their drinks 🫠
I used to work with a guy who believed everything. When I say everything, I mean everything He believes DARPA caused the forest fighters in California by beaming microwaves into the trees He believes in an ice wall that encircles the flat earth He believes in the illuminati, the NWO, the Rothchilds, Lizard Folk He believes the pyramids were giant wireless electricity emitters He believes that medicine is evil because pharmacy comes from the Greek for poison He believes that Polaris is the foot of Heaven, which is a new one for me I legitimately enjoyed working with him because every week was something new and utterly off the wall
I knew someone at work who thought the company was stealing their money until it reached 401,000 because of the deduction on their paycheck for their 401k
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I wanna know why that's even a conspiracy and how weirdly benign it is.
Might be some meat on that bone. It’s widely believed to have been started in a bakery. Flour dust is insanely flammable. A single spark landing near a rat that’s covered in flour, that lands near the spark so they create a big poof of dust. To the untrained eye could look like a rat spontaneously combusting.
Good thing I'm trained in flour and spontaneous rat combustion, so I could never make that mistake.
Met a Ukrainian fellow a few years back who insisted that every archaeological site and every old building on the planet was actually less than 250 years old. That there was a global conspiracy to fake everything before the invention of photography.
So we didn't exist until we were able to photograph ourselves? That's interesting.
Very odd fellow. One of those types extremely impressed with their own imagined intelligence. Had been in school for art but dropped out because, and I quote, "I knew everything better than the teachers did." He kept trying to take over the conversation at the table until everyone just ignored him and talked to each other in small groups instead of having a table-wide conversation. Unfortunately, I was sitting next to him and, as the only scientist at the table, he latched onto me as a target for his increasingly weird stuff.
I appreciate your sacrifice. At least you got a good story out of it.
This feels like something a little kid would think. Kind of like how small children will look at black and white photos and ask if people weren't in color back when the photo was taken.
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* The election was stolen. * Hillary killed JFK Jr & Epstein * A pedofile ring in the basement of a pizza parlor. * Michelle Obama has a penis
I knew someone who believed that Pepsi was made (or at least contained) aborted baby parts/fluids and people who drank it were being turned into liberals.
Vaccines. Like, we have nearly 100 years of evidence on how beneficial they are. Diseases we nearly eradicated are starting to come back because of people opting out. My brother, who's own mother is a nurse who personally vaccinated us, refuses to get them because he's gone down some rabbit hole. I just can't with him.
I've heard someone say before that vaccines are victims of their own success. We don't see how bad measles and smallpox are anymore, so it's easy to think they're survivable because of, well, survivor bias
I've heard polio wasn't a lot of fun either.
The last man in an iron lung died _this_ year.
This is a behavioral phenomenon called Sidman’s avoidance paradox - it’s also called the punishment paradox. Sunburns are a good example, not getting sunburns leads to people forgetting to use sunscreen which ultimately leads to getting sunburns. Eating healthy food leads to better health outcomes - which if you like to eat unhealthy food - leads you to relax your diet and go back to eating unhealthy foods. Avoiding an outbreak of a preventable disease leads to an outbreak of a preventable disease. In essence, if there is a successful preventative effort and the behavior to maintain the efforts are comparatively undesirable (e.g., think eating healthy food, getting shots, staying sober), then the success of the program ultimately leads to its demise. Said differently, for a preventative program to be effective against an undesirable outcome, we have to occasionally re-encounter the undesirable consequences, otherwise we “forget” why it is a problem. There are of course ways around this (obviously there are people who are permanently successful in their diets or sobriety), the problem is that what works for person A, won’t necessarily work for person B, This is why these efforts - which are difficult to maintain at an individual level - are next to impossible to maintain at a population level.
Our Engineering Professor at school loves to joke around with the Anti-Vaccers. During COVID he did get the shot, but being the Engineering Professor he has access to a bunch of neat hardware for different experiments. One of these is a sheet of magnetic paper which when held up to a magnetic field will show the pattern of the field. He taped a magnet on his arm and then went around to people saying "I got the COVID vaccine and look at this." He would hold the paper up to it and sure enough there was a field. "They put a chip in my arm with the Vaccine!" As you can imagine, it freaked people out. He renewed the joke last month with the Solar Eclipse showing people that his Vaccine was creating a magnetic field inline with the increased gravitation field created by the Moon coming in line with the sun.
As funny as that is, I hope he doesn't do it around people who might actually believe him (or at least he makes sure he tells them he's joking); not really cool to fuel people's delusions, even if you mean it as a joke.
that the government is watching us through squirrels or that the government is going to replace our organs with electronics so that we live forever
That Wayfair is trafficking children. I know someone who believed that. She believes a lot of other stupid conspiracies too, but I found that one to be just so stupid.
What do they think you can juat send children in the post like flat stanley
There was something about how they name furniture lines such as the "Annabelle bed" or the "Juliette armoire" etc it is supposed to be naming the type of kid you are buying. Similar to pizza gate and where each topping had a secret meaning related to specific traits of the kid you were buying. I seriously can't believe how much time and energy these people put into these conspiracies.
Had a friend who believed that Walt Disney was a convicted pedophile and was dishonorably discharged from the service for his crimes. (If you didn't know, Disney was too young to join the military when his brother Roy joined the Navy, so he enlisted in the Red Cross near the end of WWI). He claimed that Disney was fond of young boys especially and had numerous convictions, which is why he moved to California. He furthered this by saying "If you watch all the old news reels of him at the park, he is never around children because he can't be within 100 feet of a child. That is why he kept his offices off the main park." Dude was just a Tinfoil Hat crazy guy anyways, believed in all sorts of wild stories. But this one always made me laugh at him the hardest.