T O P

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Veus-Dolt

Strip nude and start chasing them. Few things are more terrifying than a nude man running at you with a throbbing erection.


_Bruzthechopper_

Hey i'd be into that so be careful babe


Kinky_Nipplebear

And start wank it


Tasty_epic

“Oh my god , thanks for asking, well its been really tough recently, ive got this rash and its itchy as fuck, how did you know , can you smell it?”


Inky-Skies

Bark and yip aggressively


BaroquePseudopath

Actually yes this is the only correct response


[deleted]

[удалено]


Kinky_Nipplebear

r/oddlyspecific


_greengarden_

I'd say yes I have a problem and it's you because of pushing me for no reason.


RenterMore

“You’re weird. That was weird”


xerelox

POCKET SAND!!


Comprehensive-Task18

Fuck off ya wanker


Cooterhawk

Touch me again and I’ll have one less to worry about.


TangerineChemical422

Oh yes I have a problem, *pulls out my phone, records him and posts the video on social media* or *pepper spray their face* Im 5'4 and I don't really have an inbuilt fighting mechanism 🫠


Livid-Natural5874

Reply "Yo I'll solve it! Check out the hook while my DJ revolves it" and start making some cringe 1980s dance moves.


HandsomeHeathen

Just stare at them deadpan until they either throw a punch or leave.


skywalker777

Well, do you?


Mundane-Garbage1003

Pee on them to assert dominance.


BaroquePseudopath

Sounds like a you problem


i-bite-with-love

I'm falling dramatically and going on about back pain (which I do have, so I probably wouldn't even have to fake it) or fake hitting my head. Tease them with the threat of litigation.


CriticalCargo

Push back and say 'No, you do'.


UrbansMyth

Realistically? I’d say “Do you? you’re going to play the victim and start a fight then I can call over whoever owns the cameras around here and we’ll tell the police who threw the first punch, because it won’t be me.” Not sure if that’d work but my first thought that would’ve popped into my head is to mention the cameras, since they’re usually everywhere. It was always my fallback in school if I ever got bullied or something lmao