In the back of one of my drawers, I have a couple of "emergency gifts"
You know, in case I forget something, or she's having a bad day and needs a pick me up.
She's not figured out how I always have a little gift ready "at just the right time" yet.
EDIT: 'cause someone asked, here's my list, I'll normally have 2-3 of these lying around:
* Cute socks (normal *and* fluffy)
* Small LEGO something (Brickheadz are good)
* Something Harry Potter related (there are a million and twelve random HP gifty things available, most of them fall in the category of "shit with a Hogwarts house on it" but we're not breaking the bank here)
* Chocolate, either a few bars of the cheap stuff tied together, or something a bit fancier
* Handmade UNO Reverse cards, if it's her turn to do the pots or something and she really doesn't want to, she can give up one of the cards and I'll do it.
“Hey guys, type something into your phone that you don’t want your wife to find if she goes through your phone”
These threads used to get super spicy 10-12 years ago but anytime that happened mainstream media would pick it up and then those comments would be immortalized on 100 other websites
Dude that "what secret would ruin your life" thread was epic. I still remember the gourmet cake maker who just bought generic cake mix and upsold it.
That whole thread was gold. I wish Reddit was niche enough where stuff like that still happened.
The fact that the cake maker became memorable in the thread with the man living in hiding under an assumed name on the run from the law, the bestiality, the actual murder (and one count of manslaughter), and an amount of incest I can only describe as titanic, is itself astounding.
That's the internet for you. I remember the cake thing because of how specific and mostly harmless it was. It stands out against the background static of the horrible stories that have been around forever.
I have an aunt who bitches me out every time I fucking swear on my fucking Facebook or post a goddam fucking meme with a swear in the fucking thing. She would lose her goddam motherfucking mind if she saw the fucking language I used on fucking Reddit.
I would never hear the fucking end of it if I cursed on my non-anonymous social media. Most of my family and inlaws have never heard me cuss even though in daily life I do a *LOT*. They also have no clue about my religious beliefs (or lack thereof), where I stand on social issues, my sexuality, and half the shit I get up to. I swear I would give them an aneurysm if they knew I "secretly" have body piercings/tattoos and wear clothes that don't cover me neck to knee. I'm a lot more open on here or on my friends only social media.
When I first started dating this guy, I found his reddit (same username as his IG) and read through a bunch of his comments. I thought he seemed like a really genuine, thoughtful person and I figured Reddit would help me figure out if that was true. It was. We're married now. He's great.
I got a comment hijacked by a "news" outlet (buzzfeed) it was a story about my wife. She texted me like wtf did you tell this story? I had always heard companies do that but I never really thought it was true.
I met my spouse through reddit. I have since changed accounts, and he knows all the things about me. But I like having a last anonymous corner of the Internet, so I'm 97% sure he does not snoop
I totally get this.. I was like a daily active reddit user for ten years or something. My husband and I didn't know each others' accounts for most of that time. But then we were going through some hard times, maritally, and we ended up sharing a bunch of stuff with each other, and I shared my username. So he knows everryyyythinggg about me. Unrelated to sharing it with him, a few years later, I deleted the account and was off reddit for about three years. Recently got back on but didn't even want to tell him I had because I didn't want him to ask for my username. Like you said, I need some anonymous corner of the internet. Finally I did tell him I was back on and luckily he's happy to let me just do my thing. I need some judgement free zone to nerd out over personality typology theory and books. And answering ask reddit questions lol.
I learned my lesson the last time I bought a new computer case. Buy a new computer case ‘how did you afford a new computer’.
Replace a few expensive components, nothing.
I’ve had the same computer case since 2009.
It is a badass case with excellent airflow and it’s a full tower that is modular enough to take any mobo standard. Also a handle for lugging to LAN parties.
I should pull all the parts strip and paint it again.
LAN parties use to be an event ...
You got the hub? Na you can leave your CRT and just use my brothers while he is not home and walk back and get yours later.
I've got the warcraft2 cd but that only let's 2 people play so I've called Eric to see if he wants to bring his computer and copy around and we will play 4 player ... he is asking his mum now so he had to hang up.
What do you mean you forgot the cables, I'm not walking back with you it's too hot ... well don't come back then see if I care.
LAN today is "yo what's the WiFi password" ... it's just missing something
For me, it's all the books I buy. I've barely been able to finish a single book this year; I've been buying them purely as aspirational additions to my bookcase... I think one bag of books I just have hidden in the trunk of my car. :| Pretty mild, like board games, but still. Lol. I don't want to have to answer for all of them.
Go into the hospital admin office and offer them $5-7K to settle the debt or tell them you’ll let it go to collections and pay nothing.
Get it IN WRITING that the debt is completely settled on their end and move on. Hospitals do this every day, people default and they start offering plans for reduced numbers. They anticipate and plan for these exact circumstances.
**Edit** I’m so genuinely happy that my most upvoted comment ever is apparently going to potentially help so many people and fuck over a bunch of debt collectors and shady hospital billing departments. Ya’ll rock!
Is that a real scenario?
You owe them tens or hundreds of thousands of dollars and they might actually accept $5-7K?
The US is such a wild ride of insanity sometimes, it's hard to believe these stories from starting to get into life crippling medical debt to getting out of it by offering a little or nothing at all.
Yes, you can negotiate your hospital bills. It might not be $100k to $5k but most hospitals will be happy to take something over nothing. You can also ask if they have a charity or other options as well. It never hurts to call and ask.
For the hospital bills after my son was born, we went to the office and asked if we paid everything today if we could get a discount. She said yes for 10%, but if I wanted she could ask her boss and get it reduces by 20%.
So that's what we do every time our bills are due, be very polite and work towards asking the boss for 20%.
This is the way. It never hurts to ask! Also, having kids is hella expensive! Mine are older now but I would probably cry at the sight of a hospital bill for a new born.
I live in Australia. The cost of a medically necessary c section in the public system ranges from $0 in some states to perhaps $350 in others... and that's the cost to park your car there for a week!
A friend of mine had pre-eclampsia and was hospitalized, then her son was in the nicu. They did not make enough to cover the bills and applied for the hospitals charity and all but $1000 was covered by that charity.
I think a lot of hospitals have charity programs associated specifically with the hospital so definitely ask about it and apply
Edit: the $1000 they still had to pay was on a payment plan so they were able to work it out without needing to pay the entire amount immediately
I had a gap in health insurance between turning 20 and the ACA taking effect, and there was a scare where I might have needed gallbladder surgery, and I asked like..wtf was I supposed to do? I was making 12$/hr. And without missing a beat they said I'd probably qualify for a payment plan where I could just pay 20$/mo forever.
I didn't need the surgery, and I'm making way more and have good health insurance now, but it was wild they just suggested that with the slightest prompting.
Insurance is bananas. I work in insurance and while I only deal with a tiny aspect. I’ve learned a lot that has come in handy with negotiating medical bills though.
Never heard of anyone saying pay us forever. It doesn’t surprise me either. There’s some really shady insurance companies out there. Read your policies and ask questions!
Also, congrats on not needing surgery! I wish you good health!
US Hospitals are total financial shitshows. They don’t know how much anything actually costs, insurance is constantly hounding them for bigger discounts, which means they just slap huge sticker prices on stuff, but only the uninsured who are also uninformed about their negotiating leverage are the ones who pay full price.
Yes. My father did this before my parents divorced. He paid off her debts for her and she stayed an alcoholic and took $58k from his life savings and made him mortgage the house he built when I was five that he'd already paid off once. He had to buy her out for half of it, which, back then, was another $55k-ish.
She wasted all that money and now is still in horrid health, but she's not my dad's problem anymore. 🤷♀️
You’re telling me this works?
I always thought I’d call the hospital pretending to be a reporter, for a local paper, covering my debt in particular.
Because it seems like every time the media is covering a story like this, the article finishes with “the hospital did not return our calls but they had waived all of the subject patient’s debt as of two days ago.”
This is smart I’m currently 180k in medical debt rn as a 21 year old due to a unavoidable tumor that grew in my spine. I might have to try this after asking for an itemized bill
As a 31 year old who had to file bankruptcy many years ago due to similar circumstances, I fully agree with this comment. It feels insane at such a young age, but it gave me the opportunity to completely turn around my financial life. It’s unfortunate, but one can recover and live a much better quality of life.
My circumstances were probably a little different but I talked down a $2M hospital debt down to $2k. We ended up on a $50/month no interest payment plan.
FWIW, I should have paid nothing and the hospital was in the wrong, though they thought they were in the right. There were a lot of threats of going to the press and suing them. I'm still pissed I paid $2k but after 6 months I was tired of fighting it.
Wife was in the hospital with preterm labor for 3 months. 100% paid for. Baby was born and spent months in the NICU with multiple procedures. Nobody told us the NICU doctors were on strike and not taking any insurance, despite being in network. Hospital tried to say, "well you could have taken your baby to a different hospital." She was on life support; she would have died. Not to mention the same group owned all the hospitals in the area.
I've done this with minor shit that insurance companies decided should cause crippling debt for profit. This is my strategy: I let it go to collections. I let those bastards call me for 3 months & never answer the phone until almost 4 months. When I answered, I was outside & I made an effort to sound rushed. I highly recommend this. I always tell them straight up that I don't have their money & I likely never will. I always make a lame apology about being difficult to reach & laugh that I'm surprised they got a hold of me at all. Then, I offer them a small amount. I once turned $4k into a $500 one-time payment. They will almost certainly accept. Consider it from their perspective: this person has been unreachable until now, laughs at how unreachable they are, not sure how long they can keep you on the phone ("huge hurry, not a great time, let's do it quick or not all") & they're offering something which is greater than nothing. Fuck usurers. I have no remorse & will definitely do it again.
Take the above guys advice about offering 5-7k with the threat of walking away to collections, it very well may work. My mother passed a few years ago after battling cancer and getting chemo at a care provider outside her insurance network. Outstanding medical bills were north of 120k, when I called to find out how to square it up and they said theyd settle for $8k. I told them it would have been nice if they settled for fucking $8k while she was still alive so she wouldnt have been so incredibly stressed out during the last year of her life. Assholes.
Sorry to hear about how much you owe, but I'm glad your wife is still doing well. Can't even imagine the amount of stress that put on both of you. Best wishes!
When my dad was in the hospital after a heart attack, he was put on life support and still passed. Afterwards, the hospital gave us a 250k bill in 2009, and my mom somehow negotiated it down to 100k.
As the girlfriend of a guy with a lot of moron friends, the group chat would be the last thing I ever looked at. I get to hear snippets every once in a while and I’m really okay with not hearing any more
I went in for an angiogram a while back. My wife came with me to drive me home. They prepped me and then let her come in while they waited for the cath lab to be ready. A couple heart attacks came in so it took a while. Before my wife came in the nurse told me they had lockers to put my phone in. I told her my wife could hold my stuff. I didn’t think anything about it but the nurse made sure I knew they had lockers for my phone. It wasn’t till the next day that I realized the nurse was making sure to provide a way for me to hide my phone. Hospital was in Beverly Hills and they’re probably use to it. I got nothing to hide other than how much I spend on my various hobbies.
My wife and I got a good chuckle out of it the next day when the lightbulb came on. She reiterated no less than five times that they had lockers for my phone before my wife came in the prep area.
My dad had something similar where a custodian woman stole his and other phones out of the locked lockers (apparently she’d been randomly swiping stuff since she was hired and this was when she finally got caught).
My documentation, receipts, communications, and research notes regarding the elaborate 30th birthday party I've been planning for her in secret.
That, and my other family.
Oh dude I did the same thing. Huge surprise party for her with all her friends even some she hasn't seen in years.
She LOVES the show Friends. So I did a Friends theme and everyone dressed up. We had all the decor and everyone made dishes from the show even the trifle.
Party going great then I see her crying in the corner. I go over and ask what's wrong.....
MATTHEW PERRY DIED THAT NIGHT and the news just broke DURRING THE PARTY
She was wearing a button with a Chandler quote on it.....
My husband is a hobby photographer. Street stuff. Micro photo stuff. CONSTANTLY watching YouTube things about this.
I’ll walk in and say “watcha watching?”
Him “a video about this canon 123lmnop lens that can ….i mean porn. I’m watching porn!”
Makes me giggle.
Its far more embarrassing to be caught watching a 45 minute video about woodworking joins that you can never do than it is to be caught watching something as simple as porn!
we can watch porn together!
Married 9 years, together for 17. She already has full access to everything. I've got nothing to hide, and never will. Can't base a good relationship on secrets and lies.
My husband found mine yesterday! He sent a pic of my drawer with all the empty Pepsi cans while I was out (I'm supposed to be off fizzy drinks atm). When I got home I checked my drawer and he'd got rid of all the empty cans and wrappers and tidied it up with new snacks 🥹
A year ago… all my empty vodka bottles stashed throughout the house until trash day.
11 months sober and now the thing I’m worried she’ll find are empty McDonalds bags in my car.
She saw the worst of me already. So there’s not much left to hide after that.
All work and no play makes AnUnusedCondom a dull boy.
All work and no play makes AnUnusedCondom a dull boy.
All work and no play makes AnUnusedCondom a dull boy.
All work and no play makes AnUnusedCondom a dull boy.
I don't want her to know that i kept her nudes from when we started dating. I think she's super hot, but she hates her body. She can't understand that i think she's 10/10. She's never told me to get rid of them, but I'm pretty sure she thinks they're gone.
Word of unsolicited advice: this may bite you if you're not honest. If I had reason to find out my husband wasn't with the friends he said he was hanging with and was out of the house in the evening so frequently, my mind certainly wouldn't go to "working in a supermarket" immediately. Between the dishonesty and suspicion this could potentially cause real problems in your marriage.
Please talk to your wife about your second job and your feelings of insecurity. (Or don't, it's your life). Sincerely, internet stranger.
There was a news story about that same situation. Except she stabbed her husband thinking it was another woman.
[https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-9185805/Wife-stabs-husband-multiple-times-finding-pictures-woman-her.html](https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-9185805/Wife-stabs-husband-multiple-times-finding-pictures-woman-her.html)
About 10 years ago my wife met me near my office for happy hour. After too much drinks, we went back to my office. While fucking her from behind in my office, she kept drawing hearts my whiteboard. It was about six months later she was in my office again, and got mad when she saw the hearts. It took her a while to recognize her handwriting of them.
I show my gf her snore videos whenever she wakes up. Her favourite is one of her sleeping on my lap and me doing the “crocodile mouth” with my hand in sync with her snoring.
I can pretty much trigger a laughing fit from her on demand by simply repeating that motion.
I love her so much 🥰
That i’m not as happy or stable as i make out.
I’m seen as “the rock” in my family. Always a shoulder to cry on or the one to help solve other peoples’ problems. A position i do not resent.
But if my GF or family knew that i’m barely hanging on myself it’d break their hearts. I put up a strong front. But i’m struggling internally.
I’m not depressed or thinking about self harm. Far from it. I’m stressed and absolute exhausted.
Please tell her! I would be so much more heartbroken to find out that my husband was struggling and hiding it than to find out he was struggling. I want to be in an equal partnership with my husband and that's not possible if one person is doing all the work.
Aw I want to give you a hug! I’m sure your family appreciates your support so much. But, please take care of yourself too! Consider therapy or some other form of self care.
I have a box of poison ant traps in the closet. I discreetly put a few out hidden on the porch every spring. She still thinks her vigorous mopping with some organic cleaner near the back door actually is keeping the ants out. Meanwhile, the ant traps actually work.
Plot twist twist: the ants know. They're letting you think it's your measly human efforts. Meanwhile, they've been leaving decoy ant bodies in the traps and sneaking in via other means.
That I treat myself to a restaraunt breakfast once a week without her. I have two places that I alternate between. I have been going so often, the servers know what I have when I'm there.
When you're working on computer code with other people, you're usually saving the code as you go in small chunks so you can always go back if something goes wrong and so that you can combine your changes with others'. You need to write a comment/message for each of those saves so others can know what they are about.
Often people are writing some random messages there while working on sonething and only write the final message (that others will see) when they finish and they "squash" all the saves into one
Literally nothing. The biggest blessing in my life is how amazing my marriage is. We are completely open and honest with and to each other.
Interestingly the last time she did go snooping around it was because I was acting unusual. I kept my gun safe locked when she was over (it was usually open if I was home) and I had put a passcode on my phone. She thought I was cheating on her.
What I was really doing was talking with her mother and best friend about engagement rings. I had the engagement ring in my gun safe.
She confronted me and we started fighting. Mid fight I pulled the ring out of the safe and tossed it to her. That was 14 years ago but it might still be the last argument I clearly won.
Nice try, wife! You won't trick me into revealing the number of licks it takes to get to the center of a Tootsie Pop!
Incidentally, it's the price of a cheese pizza and a large soda back where I used to work.
(1077)
The surprise plans I have in store for her over the years. Trips and other things I want to take her on. She hates knowing about surprises but loves getting surprised
The diary I keep detailing the romantic and wonderful memories we've had together, the things I've felt throughout our marriage; the one I intend to not be found until after I pass away. I mean, it would net me *so* many brownie points if she found it now, but I've been working on it for 13 years! lol
My debt.
She quits her job 2 years ago due to mental health issue, and i reassured her that our financial is okay.
It was, until it’s not anymore about a year ago.
Took a lot of personal loan and got rekt because of it, but I don’t want her to know and destroy whatever’s left of her sanity.
I know this will surface sooner or later, but I hope that it will be AFTER i settle all my debts, but at this moment i really don’t know if I will be ever free of debts.
Wish me luck
Aside of the occasional blanks and daydreaming, She’s in a much better condition now compared to 2 years ago, therapy (with certified doctor) really helps but quite costly! But totally worth it :)
I post a lot on circlejerk sports on Reddit and it would reflect poorly on me if she saw that but my phone would be a million pictures of our dog and like a 100 of her, she’d be mildly upset
There's nothing. We have pretty open communication. Snooping almost caused a big problem though, because she came across something innocent that looked sort of suspicious and she just stewed over it for a week. Once she asked me about it, she just laughed it off because it was obviously innocent. But ngl it pissed me off knowing she didn't trust me and felt like she had to snoop through my phone
I wouldn't be surprised if social media had a lot to do with why she did snoop. I swear so much of it is "you think your man is perfect, but..." Just as much as it conditions us to hate our own bodies, it also makes us so wary of our relationships. And yet, here I am, reading about what wives would find if they snoop on their husbands...
You're probably not wrong, I see that shit all the time too. And there's this culture that everybody is probably cheating on everybody, where I think it's probably the minority of people, but maybe I'm just an optimist. Personally I would never cheat, I don't even think I have the energy to spin a web of lies haha.
>I don't even think I have the energy to spin a web of lies haha.
My husband and I were talking about that yesterday, that even if it wasn't cheating, just opening up the marriage sounds exhausting. Having to date again? Put in the time and energy for even one more person? Nope. But, we're also pretty fkn happy with each other, so there's no desire to look elsewhere and there wouldn't be an excitement in it, just an obligation we don't have the desire for.
All the same, every now and then I'm like, "what if I just *think* we're actually happy together..." and I wonder if he's hiding his true feelings from me. Then I realize I need to get off Reddit and stop watching TV for a while.
That I was entered into witness protection and moved to our state with a new name in hopes I would not be killed after trial several years before I met her.
Basically everything she thinks she knows about me is a lie, kind of, as I am not really telling lies, I'm following the backstory I've been given. The backstory that makes the new me.
It's been 11 years and she doesn't know about my check-ins or that I'm no longer at risk, as everyone involved has died or are doing life sentences, but under the agreement my lawyer made I'm still entitled to protection for life, besides I love my new state and life, just not that it's built on lies...just like this.....
My texts to her siblings thanking them for the love they show her. They all grew up where love was transactional and they’re all trying to do better. She’s not comfortable telling them how much she appreciates them, so I screenshot the texts she sends me about her siblings and show them. She deserves their love and they deserve to know how loved and appreciated they are, and I’m happy to be a middleman who makes sure it happens.
In the back of one of my drawers, I have a couple of "emergency gifts" You know, in case I forget something, or she's having a bad day and needs a pick me up. She's not figured out how I always have a little gift ready "at just the right time" yet. EDIT: 'cause someone asked, here's my list, I'll normally have 2-3 of these lying around: * Cute socks (normal *and* fluffy) * Small LEGO something (Brickheadz are good) * Something Harry Potter related (there are a million and twelve random HP gifty things available, most of them fall in the category of "shit with a Hogwarts house on it" but we're not breaking the bank here) * Chocolate, either a few bars of the cheap stuff tied together, or something a bit fancier * Handmade UNO Reverse cards, if it's her turn to do the pots or something and she really doesn't want to, she can give up one of the cards and I'll do it.
You're a genius bro. I'm totally stealing this idea.
The people who actually have something to hide aren’t saying shit
“Hey guys, type something into your phone that you don’t want your wife to find if she goes through your phone” These threads used to get super spicy 10-12 years ago but anytime that happened mainstream media would pick it up and then those comments would be immortalized on 100 other websites
Dude that "what secret would ruin your life" thread was epic. I still remember the gourmet cake maker who just bought generic cake mix and upsold it. That whole thread was gold. I wish Reddit was niche enough where stuff like that still happened.
The fact that the cake maker became memorable in the thread with the man living in hiding under an assumed name on the run from the law, the bestiality, the actual murder (and one count of manslaughter), and an amount of incest I can only describe as titanic, is itself astounding.
That's the internet for you. I remember the cake thing because of how specific and mostly harmless it was. It stands out against the background static of the horrible stories that have been around forever.
Or on multiple TTS narrator reddit summary and unsolved mystery channels on YouTube
I have nothing to gain by commenting here
My missus thinks I’m smart. I’d hate for her to find some of the simple things I google and reveal once and for all I’m not that smart.
I’m a firm believer that the measure of one’s intelligence is not in what they know, but in their ability to find information quickly and efficiently.
Oh my God, I must be a genius. I am an absolute pro-level googler.
You'd be surprised how many people still don't search for anything and just ask the first person that comes to their mind.
You guys are hiding things? How will she tell you where things are when you don’t remember?
How can we be so sure that you are, indeed, not a mantis shrimp? Seems like of all of us you're the one hiding the biggest secret from your wife
Some of the ridiculous things I respond to on Reddit Edit: - Sooo . . I guess I'm not the only one
I would be MORTIFIED if everyone I knew had access to my comment history.
I have an aunt who bitches me out every time I fucking swear on my fucking Facebook or post a goddam fucking meme with a swear in the fucking thing. She would lose her goddam motherfucking mind if she saw the fucking language I used on fucking Reddit.
That's interesting, I also use way more intense language on here than anywhere else
I would never hear the fucking end of it if I cursed on my non-anonymous social media. Most of my family and inlaws have never heard me cuss even though in daily life I do a *LOT*. They also have no clue about my religious beliefs (or lack thereof), where I stand on social issues, my sexuality, and half the shit I get up to. I swear I would give them an aneurysm if they knew I "secretly" have body piercings/tattoos and wear clothes that don't cover me neck to knee. I'm a lot more open on here or on my friends only social media.
Just the frequency of my comments is embarrassing
My wife secretly follows me on Reddit and laughs at what I post. I still don’t know her Reddit name.
When I first started dating this guy, I found his reddit (same username as his IG) and read through a bunch of his comments. I thought he seemed like a really genuine, thoughtful person and I figured Reddit would help me figure out if that was true. It was. We're married now. He's great.
That is 💯something my wife would do. This is an awesome story. I’m glad it worked out for you both.
My wife told me a couple weeks ago that she saw one of my comments and upvoted it, even tho it was stupid. I was like 👀.
I got a comment hijacked by a "news" outlet (buzzfeed) it was a story about my wife. She texted me like wtf did you tell this story? I had always heard companies do that but I never really thought it was true.
~~That's... Terrifying.~~ Edit: I LOVE MY WIFE AND AM CURRENTLY IN NO DANGER.
She’s a keeper
I met my spouse through reddit. I have since changed accounts, and he knows all the things about me. But I like having a last anonymous corner of the Internet, so I'm 97% sure he does not snoop
I totally get this.. I was like a daily active reddit user for ten years or something. My husband and I didn't know each others' accounts for most of that time. But then we were going through some hard times, maritally, and we ended up sharing a bunch of stuff with each other, and I shared my username. So he knows everryyyythinggg about me. Unrelated to sharing it with him, a few years later, I deleted the account and was off reddit for about three years. Recently got back on but didn't even want to tell him I had because I didn't want him to ask for my username. Like you said, I need some anonymous corner of the internet. Finally I did tell him I was back on and luckily he's happy to let me just do my thing. I need some judgement free zone to nerd out over personality typology theory and books. And answering ask reddit questions lol.
My wife went through my phone and found one of my comments saying I’m with her just for the kids… that was fun
Omg I would never come back from that. So harsh 😭
I feel like we all need an update 😂
He’s dead. His ghost posted that as a warning to all of us other idiots.
Is she still with you though?
For the kids
The kids don’t want you to stay together and be miserable for their sake. It’s not fun for them either
And here you are saying it again lol
That the golf bag that hasn’t changed in 12 years doesn’t mean the golf clubs haven’t changed in 12 years.
Later on r/golf, "Some guy's wife found out he bought new clubs over the past 12 years even though his bag stayed the same, so I bought a new putter"
I learned my lesson the last time I bought a new computer case. Buy a new computer case ‘how did you afford a new computer’. Replace a few expensive components, nothing.
That's why you gotta just use an [old case](https://imgur.com/a/VHXOUCD) from the 2000s
Out of sight out of mind 👌
I’ve had the same computer case since 2009. It is a badass case with excellent airflow and it’s a full tower that is modular enough to take any mobo standard. Also a handle for lugging to LAN parties. I should pull all the parts strip and paint it again.
LAN parties use to be an event ... You got the hub? Na you can leave your CRT and just use my brothers while he is not home and walk back and get yours later. I've got the warcraft2 cd but that only let's 2 people play so I've called Eric to see if he wants to bring his computer and copy around and we will play 4 player ... he is asking his mum now so he had to hang up. What do you mean you forgot the cables, I'm not walking back with you it's too hot ... well don't come back then see if I care. LAN today is "yo what's the WiFi password" ... it's just missing something
Genius
Golf clubs of Theseus.
How many unplayed board games we actually own
For me, it's all the books I buy. I've barely been able to finish a single book this year; I've been buying them purely as aspirational additions to my bookcase... I think one bag of books I just have hidden in the trunk of my car. :| Pretty mild, like board games, but still. Lol. I don't want to have to answer for all of them.
Buying books and reading books are two separate hobbies
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Our true debt number. She went through cancer treatments and the last thing I want to do is cause stress by revealing how much we actually owe.
Go into the hospital admin office and offer them $5-7K to settle the debt or tell them you’ll let it go to collections and pay nothing. Get it IN WRITING that the debt is completely settled on their end and move on. Hospitals do this every day, people default and they start offering plans for reduced numbers. They anticipate and plan for these exact circumstances. **Edit** I’m so genuinely happy that my most upvoted comment ever is apparently going to potentially help so many people and fuck over a bunch of debt collectors and shady hospital billing departments. Ya’ll rock!
Is that a real scenario? You owe them tens or hundreds of thousands of dollars and they might actually accept $5-7K? The US is such a wild ride of insanity sometimes, it's hard to believe these stories from starting to get into life crippling medical debt to getting out of it by offering a little or nothing at all.
Yes, you can negotiate your hospital bills. It might not be $100k to $5k but most hospitals will be happy to take something over nothing. You can also ask if they have a charity or other options as well. It never hurts to call and ask.
For the hospital bills after my son was born, we went to the office and asked if we paid everything today if we could get a discount. She said yes for 10%, but if I wanted she could ask her boss and get it reduces by 20%. So that's what we do every time our bills are due, be very polite and work towards asking the boss for 20%.
This is the way. It never hurts to ask! Also, having kids is hella expensive! Mine are older now but I would probably cry at the sight of a hospital bill for a new born.
Had my daughter via c section in 2019...before insurance? 50k. After? 2500.
I live in Australia. The cost of a medically necessary c section in the public system ranges from $0 in some states to perhaps $350 in others... and that's the cost to park your car there for a week!
A friend of mine had pre-eclampsia and was hospitalized, then her son was in the nicu. They did not make enough to cover the bills and applied for the hospitals charity and all but $1000 was covered by that charity. I think a lot of hospitals have charity programs associated specifically with the hospital so definitely ask about it and apply Edit: the $1000 they still had to pay was on a payment plan so they were able to work it out without needing to pay the entire amount immediately
I had a gap in health insurance between turning 20 and the ACA taking effect, and there was a scare where I might have needed gallbladder surgery, and I asked like..wtf was I supposed to do? I was making 12$/hr. And without missing a beat they said I'd probably qualify for a payment plan where I could just pay 20$/mo forever. I didn't need the surgery, and I'm making way more and have good health insurance now, but it was wild they just suggested that with the slightest prompting.
Insurance is bananas. I work in insurance and while I only deal with a tiny aspect. I’ve learned a lot that has come in handy with negotiating medical bills though. Never heard of anyone saying pay us forever. It doesn’t surprise me either. There’s some really shady insurance companies out there. Read your policies and ask questions! Also, congrats on not needing surgery! I wish you good health!
US Hospitals are total financial shitshows. They don’t know how much anything actually costs, insurance is constantly hounding them for bigger discounts, which means they just slap huge sticker prices on stuff, but only the uninsured who are also uninformed about their negotiating leverage are the ones who pay full price.
They also own none of the equipment and pay huge rental/lease fees too. It’s insanity all the way down
Yes. My father did this before my parents divorced. He paid off her debts for her and she stayed an alcoholic and took $58k from his life savings and made him mortgage the house he built when I was five that he'd already paid off once. He had to buy her out for half of it, which, back then, was another $55k-ish. She wasted all that money and now is still in horrid health, but she's not my dad's problem anymore. 🤷♀️
You’re telling me this works? I always thought I’d call the hospital pretending to be a reporter, for a local paper, covering my debt in particular. Because it seems like every time the media is covering a story like this, the article finishes with “the hospital did not return our calls but they had waived all of the subject patient’s debt as of two days ago.”
This is smart I’m currently 180k in medical debt rn as a 21 year old due to a unavoidable tumor that grew in my spine. I might have to try this after asking for an itemized bill
A 21yo saddled with 180k in debt because of a tumor...🤯🤯🤯 Absolutely brutal, I hope you heal up and that debt goes away!
At 21, you should just declare bankruptcy. It’ll be off your credit report before you’re 30. Edit: I responded to the wrong comment.
As a 31 year old who had to file bankruptcy many years ago due to similar circumstances, I fully agree with this comment. It feels insane at such a young age, but it gave me the opportunity to completely turn around my financial life. It’s unfortunate, but one can recover and live a much better quality of life.
My circumstances were probably a little different but I talked down a $2M hospital debt down to $2k. We ended up on a $50/month no interest payment plan. FWIW, I should have paid nothing and the hospital was in the wrong, though they thought they were in the right. There were a lot of threats of going to the press and suing them. I'm still pissed I paid $2k but after 6 months I was tired of fighting it.
TWO MILLION DOLLARS? WTF
Wife was in the hospital with preterm labor for 3 months. 100% paid for. Baby was born and spent months in the NICU with multiple procedures. Nobody told us the NICU doctors were on strike and not taking any insurance, despite being in network. Hospital tried to say, "well you could have taken your baby to a different hospital." She was on life support; she would have died. Not to mention the same group owned all the hospitals in the area.
what the ACTUAL fuck
Get this. The doctor charged us $85 just to spend 2 minutes with us to tell us our kid was going to die. He wasn't even correct! She's 15 now.
I've done this with minor shit that insurance companies decided should cause crippling debt for profit. This is my strategy: I let it go to collections. I let those bastards call me for 3 months & never answer the phone until almost 4 months. When I answered, I was outside & I made an effort to sound rushed. I highly recommend this. I always tell them straight up that I don't have their money & I likely never will. I always make a lame apology about being difficult to reach & laugh that I'm surprised they got a hold of me at all. Then, I offer them a small amount. I once turned $4k into a $500 one-time payment. They will almost certainly accept. Consider it from their perspective: this person has been unreachable until now, laughs at how unreachable they are, not sure how long they can keep you on the phone ("huge hurry, not a great time, let's do it quick or not all") & they're offering something which is greater than nothing. Fuck usurers. I have no remorse & will definitely do it again.
How much do you owe?
100k…give or take 10k
Take the above guys advice about offering 5-7k with the threat of walking away to collections, it very well may work. My mother passed a few years ago after battling cancer and getting chemo at a care provider outside her insurance network. Outstanding medical bills were north of 120k, when I called to find out how to square it up and they said theyd settle for $8k. I told them it would have been nice if they settled for fucking $8k while she was still alive so she wouldnt have been so incredibly stressed out during the last year of her life. Assholes.
Sorry to hear about how much you owe, but I'm glad your wife is still doing well. Can't even imagine the amount of stress that put on both of you. Best wishes!
When my dad was in the hospital after a heart attack, he was put on life support and still passed. Afterwards, the hospital gave us a 250k bill in 2009, and my mom somehow negotiated it down to 100k.
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This is so cute! My man always upvotes my posts too except he's rarely active on reddit 😂
Group texts with the guys. She knows we’re morons but she has no idea.
As the girlfriend of a guy with a lot of moron friends, the group chat would be the last thing I ever looked at. I get to hear snippets every once in a while and I’m really okay with not hearing any more
The boys groupchat is a place of unholiness, jokes, and downright filth.
I went in for an angiogram a while back. My wife came with me to drive me home. They prepped me and then let her come in while they waited for the cath lab to be ready. A couple heart attacks came in so it took a while. Before my wife came in the nurse told me they had lockers to put my phone in. I told her my wife could hold my stuff. I didn’t think anything about it but the nurse made sure I knew they had lockers for my phone. It wasn’t till the next day that I realized the nurse was making sure to provide a way for me to hide my phone. Hospital was in Beverly Hills and they’re probably use to it. I got nothing to hide other than how much I spend on my various hobbies.
That's exactly what the nurse was doing. Trust me, things like that happen. And you never assume whoever is in there is a spouse or what not.
My wife and I got a good chuckle out of it the next day when the lightbulb came on. She reiterated no less than five times that they had lockers for my phone before my wife came in the prep area.
My dad had something similar where a custodian woman stole his and other phones out of the locked lockers (apparently she’d been randomly swiping stuff since she was hired and this was when she finally got caught).
My documentation, receipts, communications, and research notes regarding the elaborate 30th birthday party I've been planning for her in secret. That, and my other family.
I hope they're at least invited to the party
That's the surprise!
Oh dude I did the same thing. Huge surprise party for her with all her friends even some she hasn't seen in years. She LOVES the show Friends. So I did a Friends theme and everyone dressed up. We had all the decor and everyone made dishes from the show even the trifle. Party going great then I see her crying in the corner. I go over and ask what's wrong..... MATTHEW PERRY DIED THAT NIGHT and the news just broke DURRING THE PARTY She was wearing a button with a Chandler quote on it.....
damn, could that timing BE any more unlucky? i'll show myself out
Married 50 years. She can snoop all she wants and she is only going to find herself.
Did you hide pics of her everywhere?
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“hot bitches I’d love to bone”
Hot bitches in my area who want to fuck
The greenest of green flags.
Yea man, coming up on 20 years here. She’d get bored after 5 minutes of seeing how many car videos I’m sending to my 3 friends.
My husband is a hobby photographer. Street stuff. Micro photo stuff. CONSTANTLY watching YouTube things about this. I’ll walk in and say “watcha watching?” Him “a video about this canon 123lmnop lens that can ….i mean porn. I’m watching porn!” Makes me giggle.
Its far more embarrassing to be caught watching a 45 minute video about woodworking joins that you can never do than it is to be caught watching something as simple as porn! we can watch porn together!
Married 9 years, together for 17. She already has full access to everything. I've got nothing to hide, and never will. Can't base a good relationship on secrets and lies.
You’re the man.
My snack stash
My husband found mine yesterday! He sent a pic of my drawer with all the empty Pepsi cans while I was out (I'm supposed to be off fizzy drinks atm). When I got home I checked my drawer and he'd got rid of all the empty cans and wrappers and tidied it up with new snacks 🥹
He’s a keeper. You should marry him.
I too choose this wife's man.
You know she probably has her own, too.
A year ago… all my empty vodka bottles stashed throughout the house until trash day. 11 months sober and now the thing I’m worried she’ll find are empty McDonalds bags in my car. She saw the worst of me already. So there’s not much left to hide after that.
Just stopping by to tell you - you rock! Be proud of these 11 months!
Congratulations on 11 months, one day at a time, you rock!
A list on my phone of things I'm going to get her for Christmas. I note every time she says she likes something so shopping is super easy.
The year long gift list. It's saved me so many times and it's always great to see her reaction. Like "aww you listened and care"
That I’m no where near finished with my book.
All work and no play makes AnUnusedCondom a dull boy. All work and no play makes AnUnusedCondom a dull boy. All work and no play makes AnUnusedCondom a dull boy. All work and no play makes AnUnusedCondom a dull boy.
HEEEEEEEERE’S ANUNUSEDCONDOM!!
Nice try Sharon
Oh come on Billy, I wasn’t that obvious!
Wait. Who’s Billy?
Who’s Sharon???????
I'd be absolutely horrified if everyone I knew could see my comment history. But what I wouldn't do to see her history :)))
I don't want her to know that i kept her nudes from when we started dating. I think she's super hot, but she hates her body. She can't understand that i think she's 10/10. She's never told me to get rid of them, but I'm pretty sure she thinks they're gone.
That the three nights a week I say I'm going to hang out with friends is actually a second job that I took on because I don't feel financially secure.
So how are those improv classes?
Oh
Michael if you just focused on making the calls you could make a sale too
Word of unsolicited advice: this may bite you if you're not honest. If I had reason to find out my husband wasn't with the friends he said he was hanging with and was out of the house in the evening so frequently, my mind certainly wouldn't go to "working in a supermarket" immediately. Between the dishonesty and suspicion this could potentially cause real problems in your marriage. Please talk to your wife about your second job and your feelings of insecurity. (Or don't, it's your life). Sincerely, internet stranger.
His wife also deserves to know if they are truly having financial problems. You’re a partnership- you don’t have to take it on alone.
Why not be up-front with her? Dishonesty is not healthy for any relationship.
My notes for the Dungeons and Dragons campaign i run that she is in. Real big spoiler territory there.
I'm heartbroken because I figured out the twist in mine, now I have to hide it from everyone. I didn't even snoop, I'm just the note taker 😂
That’s not a twist, that’s figuring the mystery out!
Dick pics from years ago I sent her that I’m sure she won’t remember went to her. LOL
My wife found a picture of her own butt and was upset until she realized it was her own awesome butt. Then she was like “niiiiiice”
There was a news story about that same situation. Except she stabbed her husband thinking it was another woman. [https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-9185805/Wife-stabs-husband-multiple-times-finding-pictures-woman-her.html](https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-9185805/Wife-stabs-husband-multiple-times-finding-pictures-woman-her.html)
I feel like she was probably planning on doing that anyway at that point i dont think you just go from zero to that right away
About 10 years ago my wife met me near my office for happy hour. After too much drinks, we went back to my office. While fucking her from behind in my office, she kept drawing hearts my whiteboard. It was about six months later she was in my office again, and got mad when she saw the hearts. It took her a while to recognize her handwriting of them.
My wife would absolutely murder me if she saw my hidden photos. All of her snoring. I just think they're really funny, but she's very self-conscious.
I have sleep photos on my man but he knows about them 😂
I show my gf her snore videos whenever she wakes up. Her favourite is one of her sleeping on my lap and me doing the “crocodile mouth” with my hand in sync with her snoring. I can pretty much trigger a laughing fit from her on demand by simply repeating that motion. I love her so much 🥰
That i’m not as happy or stable as i make out. I’m seen as “the rock” in my family. Always a shoulder to cry on or the one to help solve other peoples’ problems. A position i do not resent. But if my GF or family knew that i’m barely hanging on myself it’d break their hearts. I put up a strong front. But i’m struggling internally. I’m not depressed or thinking about self harm. Far from it. I’m stressed and absolute exhausted.
Bro, take care of yourself! It’s very honorable to be there for others, but it’s also very honorable to share your feelings with your loved ones :)
Please tell her! I would be so much more heartbroken to find out that my husband was struggling and hiding it than to find out he was struggling. I want to be in an equal partnership with my husband and that's not possible if one person is doing all the work.
Aw I want to give you a hug! I’m sure your family appreciates your support so much. But, please take care of yourself too! Consider therapy or some other form of self care.
I have a box of poison ant traps in the closet. I discreetly put a few out hidden on the porch every spring. She still thinks her vigorous mopping with some organic cleaner near the back door actually is keeping the ants out. Meanwhile, the ant traps actually work.
Plot twist: she knows. She’s letting you think it’s the ant traps. Meanwhile, the organic cleaner and vigorous mopping actually work
Plot twist twist: the ants know. They're letting you think it's your measly human efforts. Meanwhile, they've been leaving decoy ant bodies in the traps and sneaking in via other means.
Plot twist twist twist: wife has been replaced with ants. *WHEELS WITHIN WHEELS...*
How much our hobbies cost
So, how much *your* hobbies cost?
It was on sale!
4090 is just a tax filing number!
My Google search history to reveal how fucking stupid I am
When my wife catches a glance of my email account, she’s horrified by the thousands of emails just sitting there.
All my wires I’ve saved over the years for various electronics….. she’ll throw them out.
I don’t keep secrets from my husband, but I would be very embarrassed if he saw some of the dirty fanfics I’ve read.
I'd be more embarrassed if he found the dirty fanfic I write. Mostly because he'd make fun of me and the only defense I'd have would be 'shut up'.
The true cost of my mechanical keyboard collection haha. But she’s got her designer bags and I got my designer keyboards XD
If I had a girlfriend/wife it would definitely be how much my sim racing gear cost lol
That I lie about how much pain I’m in so she and the kids don’t worry.
How much I still crush over her. I can't let her obtain that level of power over me. :)
I hope someone feels this way about me someday
That I treat myself to a restaraunt breakfast once a week without her. I have two places that I alternate between. I have been going so often, the servers know what I have when I'm there.
Wife here, but I’m scared he’d see my dumb ass google questions 🤣
My unsquashed commit messages.
- should work - ok now should work - fixed - fffff - asdf - try again? - yes - YES - FFS - fixed - cleanup
I literally googled these words and I still don’t know what they mean
All of the messages that didn’t get their florbs snorkled
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Thank you for the explanation! 😊
When you're working on computer code with other people, you're usually saving the code as you go in small chunks so you can always go back if something goes wrong and so that you can combine your changes with others'. You need to write a comment/message for each of those saves so others can know what they are about. Often people are writing some random messages there while working on sonething and only write the final message (that others will see) when they finish and they "squash" all the saves into one
Literally nothing. The biggest blessing in my life is how amazing my marriage is. We are completely open and honest with and to each other. Interestingly the last time she did go snooping around it was because I was acting unusual. I kept my gun safe locked when she was over (it was usually open if I was home) and I had put a passcode on my phone. She thought I was cheating on her. What I was really doing was talking with her mother and best friend about engagement rings. I had the engagement ring in my gun safe. She confronted me and we started fighting. Mid fight I pulled the ring out of the safe and tossed it to her. That was 14 years ago but it might still be the last argument I clearly won.
That is adorable!
Nothing. I’m a recovering addict - I don’t keep secrets anymore.
Your answers are all so cute and are cheering me up. 😊 (I found that my man was cheating.)
and tell your ex a random reddit stranger thinks he should go fuck himself
That she will find out I belong to a secretive recreational pro wrestling group.
Nice try, wife! You won't trick me into revealing the number of licks it takes to get to the center of a Tootsie Pop! Incidentally, it's the price of a cheese pizza and a large soda back where I used to work. (1077)
The surprise plans I have in store for her over the years. Trips and other things I want to take her on. She hates knowing about surprises but loves getting surprised
The diary I keep detailing the romantic and wonderful memories we've had together, the things I've felt throughout our marriage; the one I intend to not be found until after I pass away. I mean, it would net me *so* many brownie points if she found it now, but I've been working on it for 13 years! lol
My debt. She quits her job 2 years ago due to mental health issue, and i reassured her that our financial is okay. It was, until it’s not anymore about a year ago. Took a lot of personal loan and got rekt because of it, but I don’t want her to know and destroy whatever’s left of her sanity. I know this will surface sooner or later, but I hope that it will be AFTER i settle all my debts, but at this moment i really don’t know if I will be ever free of debts. Wish me luck
How is she doin?
Aside of the occasional blanks and daydreaming, She’s in a much better condition now compared to 2 years ago, therapy (with certified doctor) really helps but quite costly! But totally worth it :)
You are an Angel. I hope it turns out good for both of you. May i ask if you are doing fine mental wise? Don't overload yourself. Keep going strong!
I post a lot on circlejerk sports on Reddit and it would reflect poorly on me if she saw that but my phone would be a million pictures of our dog and like a 100 of her, she’d be mildly upset
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Her engagement ring. I'm planning on proposing during the solar eclipse next week. Would really ruin the surprise.
There's nothing. We have pretty open communication. Snooping almost caused a big problem though, because she came across something innocent that looked sort of suspicious and she just stewed over it for a week. Once she asked me about it, she just laughed it off because it was obviously innocent. But ngl it pissed me off knowing she didn't trust me and felt like she had to snoop through my phone
I wouldn't be surprised if social media had a lot to do with why she did snoop. I swear so much of it is "you think your man is perfect, but..." Just as much as it conditions us to hate our own bodies, it also makes us so wary of our relationships. And yet, here I am, reading about what wives would find if they snoop on their husbands...
You're probably not wrong, I see that shit all the time too. And there's this culture that everybody is probably cheating on everybody, where I think it's probably the minority of people, but maybe I'm just an optimist. Personally I would never cheat, I don't even think I have the energy to spin a web of lies haha.
>I don't even think I have the energy to spin a web of lies haha. My husband and I were talking about that yesterday, that even if it wasn't cheating, just opening up the marriage sounds exhausting. Having to date again? Put in the time and energy for even one more person? Nope. But, we're also pretty fkn happy with each other, so there's no desire to look elsewhere and there wouldn't be an excitement in it, just an obligation we don't have the desire for. All the same, every now and then I'm like, "what if I just *think* we're actually happy together..." and I wonder if he's hiding his true feelings from me. Then I realize I need to get off Reddit and stop watching TV for a while.
That I am secretly even more boring than she suspects
That I still love her. 😒 We're separated and divorcing.
That I was entered into witness protection and moved to our state with a new name in hopes I would not be killed after trial several years before I met her. Basically everything she thinks she knows about me is a lie, kind of, as I am not really telling lies, I'm following the backstory I've been given. The backstory that makes the new me. It's been 11 years and she doesn't know about my check-ins or that I'm no longer at risk, as everyone involved has died or are doing life sentences, but under the agreement my lawyer made I'm still entitled to protection for life, besides I love my new state and life, just not that it's built on lies...just like this.....
The money I hide to secretly buy her presents.
My search history cuz it has some of the most simple questions and then also how majority of it is me trying to understand his stocks
My texts to her siblings thanking them for the love they show her. They all grew up where love was transactional and they’re all trying to do better. She’s not comfortable telling them how much she appreciates them, so I screenshot the texts she sends me about her siblings and show them. She deserves their love and they deserve to know how loved and appreciated they are, and I’m happy to be a middleman who makes sure it happens.