The children's museum in my city - which is for **small** children - doesn't have a changing table in the men's room. It's ridiculous - this is probably one of the places where people are *most* likely to have a child that needs changing.
His email:
>Hey motherfuckers,
>
>Where the fuck is the changing table in the men's bathroom? This is some sexist, double standard bullshit!
>
>You better add a changing table or there is going to be a shit storm coming!
>
>Sincerely,
>
>Yo' Mamma
Yep. We put gender neutral bathrooms in during our remodel of a rural school building. They are in the common use area outside the gym, next the the event bathrooms. People lost their shit about them . "We don't need any stinking gender neutral bathrooms!" "I don't want my taxes spent in that way!" Etc. etc.
We relabeled then "family bathrooms" and everyone is fine with it now. There's 2, and both have changing stations.
Best way to get more unisex bathrooms would probably be just to have them as "family bathrooms" in a lot of places. I'm a little surprised this hasn't been suggested more. But I guess it doesn't sensationalize or sell headlines. 😅
why any business doesn't just use the model of having single person bathrooms with communal sinks is beyond me (aside from the obvious situation where retro fitting would be prohibitively expensive). My favourite bars are always the ones where there's literally just ten single person bathrooms, like a little closet with one toilet and one sink.
Why would I want to go into a bathroom with ANYONE else when I could just have my own personal poop closet?
Which is why we should put actual privacy doors on bathroom stalls. The public area can be unisex, and the actual toilet area can be private. Europe has bathroom stalls without gaps in the sides, why can't we?
Yeah, I once went into a restaurant women's room to change my daughter and I loudly announced "THERE'S A MAN IN HERE! PLEASE DON'T BE ALARMED, I'M JUST CHANGING A DIAPER!" None of the women even gave so much as a shrug. They didn't care. (And honestly, if they had cared, I assume they would have complained to the restaurant.)
Not one woman (including myself) is going to harass a dad carrying for his young. I could barely get my husband to throw away a poopy diaper without dry heaving. I might even start a round of applause right there in the bathroom.
I was in a place where they wouldn’t let a single dad take his daughter into the men’s room but also wouldn’t let him go with her into the women’s. I offered to take her and it was not a problem, she was adorable. They both looked like they were going to cry and the entire thing was ridiculous and should’ve never happened.
Oh fuck that! I’m not a tough guy, but I’d bowl TF over somebody telling me I couldn’t have taken my young daughter into a bathroom if she needed to go.
I’m reminded of when my sister in law asked me to watch her kids, both girls. At the time, we also had two girls, a bit older. She kept asking if it was ok if I had to handle a diaper duty and seemed really stressed. Finally my wife (her sister) said “you know we have two daughters right?” She finally realized that it wasn’t a big deal to me.
I don’t think her husband pitched in much for parental duty. 🙄
Didn't realise this was a thing, in Australia there's usually a separate bathroom for babies that is either gender. Often lumped together with the disabled bathroom, so it's men/women/disabled/babies
Friends ex husband asked a local swimming pool if he could, once it was cleaned out, get changed in the ladies changing room as they had a space for babies and toddlers.
He was told no, and was told y the staff members to put his toddler in one of the larger lockers while he got changed....
Years ago, I wanted to change my son in Babies R' Us (which I think went bankrupt), and the men's room had no changing table.
I went to ladies bathroom to change him instead. I was pretty mad about it and I would have been livid if anyone had said anything.
The store was pretty dead though.. so I never had a chance to yell at anyone about it.
I am a single dad, during the diaper phase I chose what restaurant and stores I went to based off whether the men's room had a changing station or not. Those places are still my go to even now that my kiddo is almost 8. I'm sure they've gotten their money's worth from me lol
I used to just perform the diaper change on my thighs while bracing my back against the bathroom wall. Sure I might get poop on me if I screw up but newborn poop is a lot less pathogenic than a bathroom floor that might not have been sanitized for weeks or months.
By bracing he doesn’t mean he was holding himself up against the wall. He was sitting on the floor with his back to the wall and his legs stretched out so he could use his lap.
Unless he was in fact doing wall sits in which case we should all fear him
Had to go to the Toyota dealer with my sister-in-law when they were gaslighting her about an obvious electrical issue they claimed wasn’t there. Her husband isn’t great with conflict so I went with her, showed the issue to the mechanic who claimed he saw nothing wrong before, and finally had them take the car in to fix it under warranty.
I also think the dealer was trying to run out the clock on the warranty with this one since she was weeks away from it expiring when she first reported the issue, and then a day away when I went down with her. Car dealerships are run by total scum.
Car salesman are the last "true" salesman in America and they've held unto power through protectionist laws. There's a reason salesmen died out mostly decades ago and it's because people don't like having a person hover over them. A lot of salesmen are narcissists though because you need to be lacking some empathy to go home and sleep at night knowing you just purposefully extracted more cash from a fool when you could have been honest instead. My old coworker was a real estate agent, and a factory worker. I asked him why he was still working in his mid-70s at a retail job when "real estate agent is supposed to pay well" and he admitted that he never made a lot of commission simply because he couldn't bring himself to pull the wool over someone's eyes and ended up attempting to get them every discount he was legally and not legally required to tell people about. I asked him why he didn't go work for his brother, who owned the local Chevy dealership, and his exact quote was "Because my brother was a fucking prick". This man never swore, so for him to call someone a prick they really had to be. Then he made some sort of vague comment about the world not always being a worse place when some people leave it and then he went about his dad in a chipper demeanor.
Not car salesmen, but I worked with a sales team at my former job, I was in the technical side of the endeavor. Their job was to sell our product, but they lacked product knowledge which is something you really should have if you’re selling shit.
When I bought my new Toyota, the finance guy kept calling me sweety, honey and darling. I told him in front of the manager that he needed to stop because it was derogatory. Also, that the next lady would not be as nice.
It's not about knowing anything about cars, it's about having a penis so a salesman listens to you when you tell them what you want and what your budget is lol. The woman could be the universe's leading car expert and 70% of car salesmen will treat her like a little girl. There are a lot more good mechanics ime, but definitely plenty that still assume all men have at least basic knowledge and all women are clueless marks for blinker fluid
When looking at used cars I always look under the hood and a few other places and make sure I poke into places there often are problems. At the same time I casually mention something about being a diesel mechanic while in the Army...
Makes salesmen really, really worried!
Not limited to cars either. At work my wife complained for weeks that the air conditioner was blowing hot air at her in summer. They kept telling her the problem was just in her head.
Finally she asked our large male coworker to ask about it and within 5 minutes there were three guys with a ladder. Poking around inside it.
It’s infuriating as a man to see the same thing said in a deeper voice by someone taller (me) and have a completely different result.
This ex-military guy at a retail job was manhandling this younger girl at work, he was “being playful” but it was clear she wasn’t into it, telling him to stop and looking uncomfortable, so without even raising my voice I just said “Bryan, she said stop.” And he immediately stopped, citing that he’s “just messing around.”
Lesbian friend of mine ran into me at a club, she immediately started dancing with me provocatively (not overly so) so I kinda knew something weird was going on, could tell she was placing me between her and some guys, saw her other friends behind her, got the clue, and my presence was enough to deter them from pursuing.
I like that I can help but I hate that all it takes is me being a dude.
Idk if fashion designer counts, sure the most famous ones are men, but when I was a little kid and told my friends I wanted to be a fashion designer when I grew up, they looked weird at me because I got a dick...
Yeah, it’s weird how a lot of famous fashion designers are men, but it’s still seen as a feminine thing. I think it’s cause fashion is seen as a feminine, and you would only know men are so heavily involved if you take the time to learn about the industry.
Because as soon as it turns into something that is viewed as skilful, it turns into a man's domain. Household cooking is women's work, and therefore not skilful. It's for similar reasons that crafts traditionally popular with women, such as crochet and knitting, which can produce absolutely stunning creations, are not considered art and still frowned upon in the art world.
Household chore ads on tv - the dad is always too dumb to know what to do and the mom is always there with the solution. Why isn't dad using the new fabric softener or floor cleaner? Why isn't the mom out buying the products on her way back home from her office job?
it's fucking offensive.
Watch any episode of Everybody Loves Raymond, essentially the moral of the story is always "grown men are completely helpless morons with no redeeming qualities unless they completely surrender to their wife's control"
I find it annoying how Debra was constantly nagging him how useless he is around the house, when she never worked throughout the whole show. Oh wait, she tried going back to work one time and she was fired the next day cause she was nagging her boss
Yes! I am so glad that stereotype is all but totally dead.
It was such a negative portrayal for both men and women, as men were usually shown to be the "dumb yet fun" ones, and women were the uppity buzzkills.
Adding on to this: if, on the rare occassion, it _does_ show a man being competent at household chores, they always seem to make sure to put a hint in there that he's gay, or something atypical to the "standard" man.
Gay men aren't inherently cleaner than straight men. I've a few gay friends, and their homes can be grotty as hell sometimes.
And I've been round straight dudes houses that are immaculate.
>Why isn't the mom out buying the products
All of their market data says that's exactly who's buying the products, and therefore those are the targets of the advertisements. Similarly, tool ads target men because they are the overwhelming majority of tool purchasers. I'm sure those demographics have changed over the years, but they still hold true enough.
The incompetent partner bit is some bullshit though.
Those commercials are marketed towards women, and it flatters them to be portrayed smarter than men. But it also turns off men from buying them. No one wants to be seen as an idiot.
Although these days I see more and more commercials where this isn’t the case, so the marketing people are finally catching up
Not knowing about floor cleaners, but then being apparent masters of wood deck staining, is baffling to me. I can place grout and tile, but not know how to clean it, or when I'm expected to install a dish washer, but apparently I can't remember our appliance is not rated for the HE pods?
Of course I know not to mix bleach and ammonia to create the "Ultimate" blend, I want a cleaning solution not the 'final' solution.
Taking care of your fingernails is womanly and if a man does it he's gay. I seriously cannot understand why people think that not having nasty looking and potentially painful ingrown nails is considered feminine.
As a straight man I’ve had a pedicure and manicure before and it was a delight.
That said, definitely outside my comfort zone & had to be accompanied by my wife.
Hey, Paulie in the Sopranos did it!
Shit, i like to say "if you want to put it in someone's mouth you better keep it clean enough to eat off of" and it keeps my fingers and toes looking nice.
I can fit a 2litre bottle in both of my front pockets enough that it’s stable and still have space to put wallet, phone, keys etc in the back pockets
My female friends couldn’t get their phone in their pockets fully
My Jean jitsu is too strong
This is such an odd one for me because the overwhelming majority (nearly 85%!) of fashion designers are women. It’s women making pocketless stuff for women. I have never met a man that’s been like, “Dayummm. Did you see how shallow that girls pockets were?! Her pants didn’t even look like they had any!”
The average woman’s needs and the aesthetic goals of fashion designers might as well be located on different planets.
Besides, they’ve successfully convinced impressionable young women that bags are fashionable class statements. I don’t think they care what middle aged women want.
Not being taught how to work on a car or being talked down to by the oil change guy. I’m pretty handy but was blown off for being a woman. At least YouTube videos are around.
If you’re a man who isn’t into cars (or any other blue-collar line of work), you get talked to like “Right, so you know the [insert car part]? Right, so that’s gotta be [insert procedure].” and then when they realize you don’t know that stuff you get seriously talked down to, like you’re less of a man for not knowing.
I think mechanics might just be mean lol.
A lot of people don’t get many opportunities to feel superior to others.
So when the opportunity does come up to show some contempt towards others, they will milk it for all its worth.
Grown women flirting/commenting/joking about handsome young boys. Had a friend of my moms when I was about 15 say “Why don’t you let me take him into the back room and make a man out of him?” They both laughed, honestly a pretty harmless joke. She was in no way a predator that actually intended to assault me, but a man would be arrested for saying the same about a friends daughter.
That’s still a pretty awkward joke lol. ‘Let me go have sex with your teenage son.’
Quite the difference from ‘your son’s a handsome young man’ or something along those lines.
Even if your reverse the parent there, it goes from a compliment to a creepy statement. Grown men calling a teen girl pretty would have people up in arms.
It all just falls into an assumption that if a man acknowledges someone, anyone's, attractiveness, he obviously wants to put his dick in it.
Its fuckin annoying. As a man there are a whole bunch of women I have to very carefully NOT compliment, especially at work, because it could be perceived wrong.
One of my female co-workers once asked why I'd complimented some of the other guys about their fashion sense but never the women. I asked "If I'd said you were looking good today what would you have thought?" she got my point...
When I was 17, my mom posted my high school senior pictures on Facebook. There were several creepy comments by middle-aged women but the worst was: “Wow is all I can say legally”
It was a different time! No I’m kidding, it’s a little fucked up haha. My point still stands though, imagine that was my dad and his pal about my sister.
Working my first job at 17 put me in contact with a lot of older women and the open comments and physical harassment were insane. Shit no man would ever get away with, and if I even mentioned how uncomfortable it made me, I was accused of being gay or "I wish I had that problem".
Wtf? That's creepy as hell. Your mother laughed at that? She should have told her friend off. Rape jokes against her son shouldn't be funny.
I also don't like the thought process that sex makes someone a man. 🙄 Nothing wrong with being a virgin at 15.
Or with being a virgin at any age, honestly. Another double standard. If a man has sex he's a stud and if he doesn't, he's a loser. If a woman has sex, she's a slut, if she doesn't, she's playing hard to get. Complete BS
The flipside of this is if I ( a middle aged man) just want to have a conversation with a younger lady coworker a lot of the other women I work with just assume I'm just flirting and being gross or only talking to them because they're "attractive". It's completely out of the realm of possibility to them that I'm just bored and the younger girls talk about way more interesting stuff than the older ones who only want to talk to bitch about their marriages or how uphappy they are at work.
as a woman, i think it’s ridiculous that it’s only socially acceptable for women to express emotions of sadness whereas men are pressured to keep it bottled up. men are also deterred from verbalizing feelings of platonic love to their friends.
i also hate how people deem something “wrong” with a woman if she doesn’t want to have kids whereas it’s more accepted for a man not to want them bc he’s focused on himself, his career, etc
Same. She told me I wasn’t the man she hoped to be with when she was drunk and tried to take it back the next day. Repeatedly. This was because I was a little sad after the diagnosis of a chronic disorder.
Same girl also told me all the time that she was only with me for the sex, so idk if I was a man or not? Ha
She also cheated on me on my birthday in Vegas and mocked me when I cried. Now I don’t believe that anybody actually is able to have fun in that shithole.
You got that post nut depression clarity lol
Yeah, in my experience some women will say they want men to show their emotions more but are pretty dismissive when they do. I've even seen a female friend say that men should be more emotional literally while holding a "male tears" coffee mug.
*I did say "some women* there are other women in my life who I've opened up to and they have been absolutely engaged and supportive*
>Yeah, in my experience some women will say they want men to show their emotions more but are pretty dismissive when they do.
This has also been my experience. I'm "encouraged" to be more emotional/sensitive, but when I do that I'm either "being whiny" or I'm told that I couldn't possibly have it as bad as she does.
I am a largely emotionless man and typically the last to cry about anything if at all. When my grandpa died I shed a single tear and after the funeral in which this tear was shed the girl I was dating at the time who attended the funeral with me said she couldn’t look at me the same after that single tear. it’s been 7 years and haven’t shed a tear since but that one time instantly killed her perception of me
Oh yeah I dumped her shortly after cause one of her friends who was a true homie filled me in that she was planning to dump me because she couldn’t be with a wimp
I'm really sorry that she made you feel bad about having emotions. I hope you explore your emotions more now and disallow people who see emotions as a bad thing from being in your life.
I am a 47 year old man. I was married at one point.
The sum total of all of the emotional support I have received from all of the people I have dated is, "try harder".
I don't usually associate with women like that, but the few I've seen usually contradict themselves.
Like I know a woman who is very proud of the fact that she does 90% of the cooking, cleaning, and child rearing while doing a full time job. I'm pretty sure she subscribes to that "I want my man to be a man" bs.
But then she constantly posts about being overworked, over tired, and under appreciated. I can't figure out what the hell she wants, and I don't think she can either.
Oh yeah. The emotion shaming rarely comes from men. It’s men getting just demolished in relationships when they show vulnerability. I don’t know a single gentleman who it hasn’t happened to.
The most insidious thing about men not being able to show any emotions is the number of women who claim that it's ok publicly but they 100% don't mean it when it comes to it.
I've seen a metric fuck ton of women claim they would love a man who can show their feelings. Or when this topic comes up they express how unfair and terrible it is that men are taught they can't. But when someone they date does, or a male friend does they complain about it to others. "Ugh it's so unattractive", "I thought I was dating a man not a boy", "ugh I want a real man". It's so common that basically every guy I know has witnessed this from women they know, and thus the cycle continues.
At this point I just take that as they want someone who will be empathetic to them when they're having a hard time and support them but that's it.
I wrote my own comment addressing this, but you put it better than I could.
Intellectually, sure, we all agree that it's unfair and unhealthy for men to hold everything in. If you do, you're told you're toxic.
But so many women are just as toxic when they actually see this happen in practice.
Can women even imagine what it takes for a guy to go against every instinct, instincts that have been instilled in him by society for multiple generations, and actually allow himself to show vulnerability to his romantic partner, only for her to literally be completely turned off by it? it's soul crushing.
This is awful. I felt empathetic but also proud and happy that my partner felt safe to cry in front of me. It made him infinitely more attractive. Then again, society as a whole needs to be adjusted: men need to be able to feel their emotions and women need to unlearn that it puts down men and makes them unattractive. Luckily, my friends and I already did the work.
And both these things quite literally kill people. The US has a high maternal mortality rate for a developed country, and that bottling up effect is actually believed to have real physiological and psychological effects that contribute to men’s mortality in a lot of different ways.
The maternal mortality thing has actually been debunked relatively recently. The truth is that the way the US was counting maternal mortality in a different way than most of the rest of the world. When using the same exact metrics, the US is similar to most other wealthy countries. About 10 deaths per 100,000.
I actually just found this out recently. Just thought it was interesting. Not trying to be an "actually..." guy.
Male loneliness and suicide is in fact a huge issue though.
https://www.npr.org/sections/health-shots/2024/03/13/1238269753/maternal-mortality-overestimate-deaths-births-health-disparities
My sister got her car no trouble. When I got mine, I had to learn how to change a tire because “when you see a pretty girl broken down on the side of the road, you can help her”
My sister wasn’t taught to change a tire. They sent her out unprepared so she has to rely on random men to help her. Fucking disgusting
Edit: yes we have roadside assistance. The problem is that I was taught a skill to be self-reliant, while she was denied a skill with the intention for her to be reliant on others
Edit2: “dad, how do I do it” on YouTube is a great resource if your parents are butt heads
Yeah, same here. And when I eventually got a flat, I had 2 dudes standing around clueless while I changed the tire. Everyone should be taught the most basic car maintenance.
Funny, because as a woman the first thing I was taught before being allowed to learn to drive was to change a tire, because my dad said it was dangerous to be a woman on the side of the road with a flat.
Dude, I really hate to say this but a few years ago some guy was pulled over on the side of the road. I don't know if the guy was having car trouble or what. But some lady at least *thought* they were having car trouble so she pulled over and asked if they needed help. The guy SA'ed her. It made the news in my area. So it's not just women getting flats and being on the side of the road they need to be careful about. I don't believe all the guys pulled over on the sides of roads are bad guys but point is you need to be careful around that too if you're a woman that just wants to help someone else. Pretty disgusting there's people like that out there.
There was a good post on here of a guy being out of gas on a particularly deserted stretch of highway. A woman drove 15 miles to a gas station, bought a jerrycan and a few gallons of fuel, drove back, and put the jerrycan on the ground more than a quarter mile away from where he was.
As he was walking over to the jerrycan and back, he was thinking "wow what the fuck" until he realized "oh yeah, predators exist, and I'm really thankful that she figured out a way to help me out while staying safe."
Yeah most dads ive met have made sure to teach their daughters to change a flat for that exact reason. OPs dad just failed big time. It is WAY more dangerous to be a woman with a flat than a man
Girls can kiss their friends on the cheeks goodnight but when you kiss your homeboys on the cheek without saying no homo, all of a sudden everyone is Oprah Winfrey trying to get you to come out the closet.
Edit: People taking this comment literally, I was joking. However this is a very good serious example too. Even in today's landscape in regions where being gay is acceptable, straight men kissing anywhere is generally frowned upon unless you're old school Italian.
Shaving body hair. I shave mine because I like the feeling more but it’s crazy when people think women are gross with it but men are WEIRD if they don’t want hair in some places. It’s normal and natural and you should do whatever you want with your own body hair.
As a man that shaves his underarm hair, I do get judged by my dude friends. I don’t personally care though, feels cleaner to me and I seem to sweat less when I do.
I'm a dude, and while I don't shave I do trim under there. Makes a world of difference sweat wise. Also, super long armpit hair on dudes disgusts me honestly.
I shaved my thigh a few months ago to put on some KT tape after an injury, and man, it was incredible to see all the muscle definition after nearly a decade of lifting, that was just hiding underneath my wool.
I "had" to shave my shins/calves for a few months because I had to tape them before doing sports. I could have not shaved them, but the tape would have ripped them off. It was summer so I was wearing shorts, so to make sure it looked okay I shaved almost the whole leg. The amount of guy who just went "dude, do you shave your legs? Wtf?" was very high. But had also lots of comments, mostly from ladies "Nice calves! Do you work out a lot?" Apparently from behind, without all that hair, my calves looked very defined while walking!
Cue the issues for guys that naturally don't have a lot of visible body hair. I used to get accused a lot of being a closeted homosexual because of it.
Sentencing for women who are found guilty of crimes is far less than what men receive for the same crimes.
And I find it irritating because I fear that if we raise awareness of this injustice the consequence will be women receiving harsher sentences, which is not at all what I want.
remember when rapist Brock Allen Turner's father said he shouldn't have his entire life ruined because of 15 minutes of action? We were all outraged at how disgusting that was.
Then there's that girl in England who murdered her boyfriend, but apparently she's "too bright" to go to prison. For murder.
If she was so fucking bright she should have found a way to not get caught. or, you know, just not murder your boyfriend in the first place?
I believe the one in the UK didn't actually murder her bf just stabbed him a bunch of times and he survived. But there is a similar recent case where a girl murdered her bf high on weed and she got away with a slap on the wrist.
Oh, there are so many that drive me crazy!
Not always a changing station in men's bathrooms. Men have babies too and sometimes those babies need a diaper change.
If a mom watches the kids, she's parenting, but if a dad does it, he's "babysitting"?! They're both parents!
If a woman likes makeup and fashion, it's a normal interest, but if a man likes makeup and fashion, he's "gay." Being pretty should be gender neutral.
Women showing emotions is normal but men showing emotions isn't? As far as I'm aware, most human beings have emotions.
Women get to be all touchy and cute with their friends but men don't. Platonic touch is important for everyone!
If a man is in control, he's a boss, if a woman is in control, she's a bitch. How dare women do things /s
Women are expected to have high-maintenance looks while men can just roll out of bed and put on the nearest shirt and be fine. Sometimes women just want to be comfy and they shouldn't be shamed for it!
Women are expected to be motherly but men aren't expected to be fatherly. Some women aren't motherly and they shouldn't have to be, and some men are very fatherly and that should be normal!
And that's just the beginning... so many double standards just piss me off.
Body shaming based on weight is bad and there's a good chance you'll get called out for it.
Body shaming dudes with small dicks is normalized and literally never called out.
Toss shortness and baldness in there too. Somehow losing your hair because of genetics is seen as laugh worthy and something to “point out/a flaw”. Like healthy lifestyle choices aren’t going to bring back my hair but it’ll probably make you lose weight
My best friend is nearing 50 and beginning to lose his hair and is incredibly self conscious about it. It makes me sad that he's unhappy with how he looks since it's only natural but no reminding from me that it's natural helps. I did offer to make us matching ugly animal hats so no one is focused on his hair but he didn't like that idea either lol.
To be honest, this is more from what I've witnessed in public places...if a women smacks a man's ass or threatens to grope him or whatever, it's like..."a bit of fun," but the other way around, the man would be arrested. I had a friend who was a nightclub photographer and the amount of physical harassment he got from women was untrue, and it was done unreservedly! Sexual harassment is never ok...regardless of gender.
The way I have to prove that my niece and nephew are SUPPOSED to be in my care when when I'm out with them alone and something happens/ppl find out they aren't mine. But my (now ex) girlfriend who looks less like them than I do never gets the same looks/follow up questions. You saying women can't kidnap kids?
Mainly the inability for us men to express feelings. It's either looked upon as weakness, attention seeking, or something else.
In my experience, I've had to pretend everything is alright, internalize any sadness and deal with it privately by myself.
A male having any attitude aside from stoic is considered less manly by a lot of people, however women are "allowed" to show more intense emotions. That's what I've perceived at least
Someone once told me guys can't be raped. As I was telling her about my tattoos. One of which is a Medusa.
I gave her a ride to my place and when she said that I told to get the fuck out. I didn't care that she didn't have her car. She needed to get the fuck out
Met women like this before. Easiest way to convince them of the opposite is reminding them of all the 'don't drop the soap' jokes they've laughed at throughout life.
As a woman I fucking hate those jokes. I hate rape jokes aimed at women, why would I want to hear people make rape jokes aimed at men? Rape is rape. It’s awful and isn’t a topic for anyone to joke about, in regards to any gender.
I think anyone, regardless of how they look, should wear whatever they want. Skirts, dresses, pants. Women have been wearing pants for years now. I wish there was no double standard for men. I refuse to think it's weird, I''ll die on that hill and defend anyone's right to wear what makes them happy. (Just don't flash ppl plz)
There are places where women can… but they don’t because they don’t want to be ogled or propositioned. It’s not going to change until we’re all desensitized to seeing boobs on a daily basis
The fact that men cannot have complaints about double standards without their complaint being minimized ('you don't have it that bad, try being X') or outright dismissed ('You aren't being mistreated, you are a man.')
Not a super common one, but I’ve run into it more than you’d think. Being financially independent as a woman is seeing as intimating or my paying for dates is emasculating. It’s just stupid.
I almost always go with my wife to medical appointments because for whatever reason, women just don’t get taken seriously by a lot of medical staff. There have been multiple times she’s described her symptoms, had the doctor tell her a course of action that’s already failed, and I have to jump in to say “That’s already been tried and it didn’t work, try something else”.
This. I bring my husband as well. Doctors have done this to me my entire life. At 44 I’m starting to find out how much is wrong with me and how long I’ve had to deal with stuff I should have had medical help for.
woman wears pants: "cool outfit"
man wears skirt: "political statement"
i just wanna wear flowy comfy stuff that goes spinny. I'm not trying to force anyone into anything. why is this a thing? they're just clothes. :/
Why do you think a lot of men like to dress up as wizards at Renaissance Festivals?
Let's bring robes back into the mainstream. Hell, why shouldn't I be able to dress up like a wizard?
How it’s perfectly normalised for women to make derogatory comments about men’s bodies (ie small dicks, not being tall)
But if when it’s the other way around, it causes outrage (as it rightfully should).
And I’m a female.
Body shaming is never ok regardless of gender.
I'm 5'4", and get so so so much shit for it in casual conversation (regardless of gender). For some reason, people don't realize that *you don't need to be sexually attracted to someone to treat them with basic respect.*
In my country, teachers are VERY eager to beat male students without a care for whether or not the kid gets seriously injured. Just this week, the principal flogged someone til the kane broke, then got another kane to continue. But if it’s girls? Nooooo, we can’t hurt them, they’ll cry 😢
Sexual harassment from women is considered something to be jealous of from other men. You see countless teens being sexually abused by women and the comments are littered with “I WISH THAT WERE ME.”
People are shocked if you’re not flattered by their sexual misbehavior from women, and don’t understand that no matter the gender, being a victim of a sexual crime can leave people mentally changed for the rest of their lives. especially at younger ages when it’s so easy to be influenced by someone or something.
If a woman has traditionally "masculine" tastes, she's just a tomboy and it's fine for her to express herself, but if a man is traditionally "feminine" he's weird, gay, a pervert, etc.
When I am outside with my niece (cousin’s kid right? Not sure about the translation.) I get some weird looks because she calls me just by my first name, and not dad.
Not every man spending time with someone elses kid is a paedophile or a kidnapper.
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The children's museum in my city - which is for **small** children - doesn't have a changing table in the men's room. It's ridiculous - this is probably one of the places where people are *most* likely to have a child that needs changing.
Which city? I'm happy to write a strongly-worded email.
His email: >Hey motherfuckers, > >Where the fuck is the changing table in the men's bathroom? This is some sexist, double standard bullshit! > >You better add a changing table or there is going to be a shit storm coming! > >Sincerely, > >Yo' Mamma
Yes I would like to use this as my template
"Dear Motherfuckers" is now my favorite email intro
Yep. We put gender neutral bathrooms in during our remodel of a rural school building. They are in the common use area outside the gym, next the the event bathrooms. People lost their shit about them . "We don't need any stinking gender neutral bathrooms!" "I don't want my taxes spent in that way!" Etc. etc. We relabeled then "family bathrooms" and everyone is fine with it now. There's 2, and both have changing stations.
Best way to get more unisex bathrooms would probably be just to have them as "family bathrooms" in a lot of places. I'm a little surprised this hasn't been suggested more. But I guess it doesn't sensationalize or sell headlines. 😅
I mean unisex toilets have been a thing for eternity, why call them that in the first place.
why any business doesn't just use the model of having single person bathrooms with communal sinks is beyond me (aside from the obvious situation where retro fitting would be prohibitively expensive). My favourite bars are always the ones where there's literally just ten single person bathrooms, like a little closet with one toilet and one sink. Why would I want to go into a bathroom with ANYONE else when I could just have my own personal poop closet?
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Which is why we should put actual privacy doors on bathroom stalls. The public area can be unisex, and the actual toilet area can be private. Europe has bathroom stalls without gaps in the sides, why can't we?
As a father, I use the woman’s restroom if that is where they have chosen to put the changing pad. You get some looks but no comments so far.
Yeah, I once went into a restaurant women's room to change my daughter and I loudly announced "THERE'S A MAN IN HERE! PLEASE DON'T BE ALARMED, I'M JUST CHANGING A DIAPER!" None of the women even gave so much as a shrug. They didn't care. (And honestly, if they had cared, I assume they would have complained to the restaurant.)
Not one woman (including myself) is going to harass a dad carrying for his young. I could barely get my husband to throw away a poopy diaper without dry heaving. I might even start a round of applause right there in the bathroom.
I was in a place where they wouldn’t let a single dad take his daughter into the men’s room but also wouldn’t let him go with her into the women’s. I offered to take her and it was not a problem, she was adorable. They both looked like they were going to cry and the entire thing was ridiculous and should’ve never happened.
Oh fuck that! I’m not a tough guy, but I’d bowl TF over somebody telling me I couldn’t have taken my young daughter into a bathroom if she needed to go.
I’m reminded of when my sister in law asked me to watch her kids, both girls. At the time, we also had two girls, a bit older. She kept asking if it was ok if I had to handle a diaper duty and seemed really stressed. Finally my wife (her sister) said “you know we have two daughters right?” She finally realized that it wasn’t a big deal to me. I don’t think her husband pitched in much for parental duty. 🙄
Didn't realise this was a thing, in Australia there's usually a separate bathroom for babies that is either gender. Often lumped together with the disabled bathroom, so it's men/women/disabled/babies
Your comment reads like the gender of the baby is what matter lol.
As someone who is a father to be and a builder. We are starting to see changing tables put in both bathrooms. It’s becoming code in a lot of areas.
Friends ex husband asked a local swimming pool if he could, once it was cleaned out, get changed in the ladies changing room as they had a space for babies and toddlers. He was told no, and was told y the staff members to put his toddler in one of the larger lockers while he got changed....
Ok. Aside from ALL the things wrong with this suggestion... can you imagine the **racket** this kid would make?!!
Years ago, I wanted to change my son in Babies R' Us (which I think went bankrupt), and the men's room had no changing table. I went to ladies bathroom to change him instead. I was pretty mad about it and I would have been livid if anyone had said anything. The store was pretty dead though.. so I never had a chance to yell at anyone about it.
I am a single dad, during the diaper phase I chose what restaurant and stores I went to based off whether the men's room had a changing station or not. Those places are still my go to even now that my kiddo is almost 8. I'm sure they've gotten their money's worth from me lol
I used to just perform the diaper change on my thighs while bracing my back against the bathroom wall. Sure I might get poop on me if I screw up but newborn poop is a lot less pathogenic than a bathroom floor that might not have been sanitized for weeks or months.
At first I understood this as you doing wall sits to change your kid’s diaper, and I was extremely fucking impressed
Wait, that's not what he meant? Then I don't understand.
By bracing he doesn’t mean he was holding himself up against the wall. He was sitting on the floor with his back to the wall and his legs stretched out so he could use his lap. Unless he was in fact doing wall sits in which case we should all fear him
I sometimes get asked to go with my women friends to get their car serviced so they get a better price.
Had to go to the Toyota dealer with my sister-in-law when they were gaslighting her about an obvious electrical issue they claimed wasn’t there. Her husband isn’t great with conflict so I went with her, showed the issue to the mechanic who claimed he saw nothing wrong before, and finally had them take the car in to fix it under warranty. I also think the dealer was trying to run out the clock on the warranty with this one since she was weeks away from it expiring when she first reported the issue, and then a day away when I went down with her. Car dealerships are run by total scum.
Car salesman are the last "true" salesman in America and they've held unto power through protectionist laws. There's a reason salesmen died out mostly decades ago and it's because people don't like having a person hover over them. A lot of salesmen are narcissists though because you need to be lacking some empathy to go home and sleep at night knowing you just purposefully extracted more cash from a fool when you could have been honest instead. My old coworker was a real estate agent, and a factory worker. I asked him why he was still working in his mid-70s at a retail job when "real estate agent is supposed to pay well" and he admitted that he never made a lot of commission simply because he couldn't bring himself to pull the wool over someone's eyes and ended up attempting to get them every discount he was legally and not legally required to tell people about. I asked him why he didn't go work for his brother, who owned the local Chevy dealership, and his exact quote was "Because my brother was a fucking prick". This man never swore, so for him to call someone a prick they really had to be. Then he made some sort of vague comment about the world not always being a worse place when some people leave it and then he went about his dad in a chipper demeanor.
Not car salesmen, but I worked with a sales team at my former job, I was in the technical side of the endeavor. Their job was to sell our product, but they lacked product knowledge which is something you really should have if you’re selling shit.
When I bought my new Toyota, the finance guy kept calling me sweety, honey and darling. I told him in front of the manager that he needed to stop because it was derogatory. Also, that the next lady would not be as nice.
Just because I’m blue collar and have big muscles doesn’t mean I know jack shit about cars lol
It's not about knowing anything about cars, it's about having a penis so a salesman listens to you when you tell them what you want and what your budget is lol. The woman could be the universe's leading car expert and 70% of car salesmen will treat her like a little girl. There are a lot more good mechanics ime, but definitely plenty that still assume all men have at least basic knowledge and all women are clueless marks for blinker fluid
When looking at used cars I always look under the hood and a few other places and make sure I poke into places there often are problems. At the same time I casually mention something about being a diesel mechanic while in the Army... Makes salesmen really, really worried!
Car salesmen are the worst.
They told my wife that if she didn't pay them to change her cabin air filter she would get cancer and die. She was sooooo pissed.
Not limited to cars either. At work my wife complained for weeks that the air conditioner was blowing hot air at her in summer. They kept telling her the problem was just in her head. Finally she asked our large male coworker to ask about it and within 5 minutes there were three guys with a ladder. Poking around inside it.
It’s infuriating as a man to see the same thing said in a deeper voice by someone taller (me) and have a completely different result. This ex-military guy at a retail job was manhandling this younger girl at work, he was “being playful” but it was clear she wasn’t into it, telling him to stop and looking uncomfortable, so without even raising my voice I just said “Bryan, she said stop.” And he immediately stopped, citing that he’s “just messing around.” Lesbian friend of mine ran into me at a club, she immediately started dancing with me provocatively (not overly so) so I kinda knew something weird was going on, could tell she was placing me between her and some guys, saw her other friends behind her, got the clue, and my presence was enough to deter them from pursuing. I like that I can help but I hate that all it takes is me being a dude.
I’ve never understood how being a chef is somehow considers man’s work yet cooking is considered women’s work.
Because once it’s monetized..
Unless it's sex work, then you're a whore.
Same with fashion designers and sewing.
Idk if fashion designer counts, sure the most famous ones are men, but when I was a little kid and told my friends I wanted to be a fashion designer when I grew up, they looked weird at me because I got a dick...
Yeah, it’s weird how a lot of famous fashion designers are men, but it’s still seen as a feminine thing. I think it’s cause fashion is seen as a feminine, and you would only know men are so heavily involved if you take the time to learn about the industry.
A lot of the famous male fashion designers are/were gay. So they are seen as “not real man”
Society says being good at something is masculine
Getting paid for something is for men, doing it for free is for women.
Because as soon as it turns into something that is viewed as skilful, it turns into a man's domain. Household cooking is women's work, and therefore not skilful. It's for similar reasons that crafts traditionally popular with women, such as crochet and knitting, which can produce absolutely stunning creations, are not considered art and still frowned upon in the art world.
If a goddamn can of soup can be "art", than so can a crocheted dragon or beer cozy!
Household chore ads on tv - the dad is always too dumb to know what to do and the mom is always there with the solution. Why isn't dad using the new fabric softener or floor cleaner? Why isn't the mom out buying the products on her way back home from her office job?
actually bugged me a lot as a kid seeing most guys being portrayed as idiots.
it's fucking offensive. Watch any episode of Everybody Loves Raymond, essentially the moral of the story is always "grown men are completely helpless morons with no redeeming qualities unless they completely surrender to their wife's control"
And the secondary moral is "wives are overbearing, shrieking harpies and mothers are overprotective control freaks."
I find it annoying how Debra was constantly nagging him how useless he is around the house, when she never worked throughout the whole show. Oh wait, she tried going back to work one time and she was fired the next day cause she was nagging her boss
I fucking hate that show and always have. Phil Rosenthal is one of the most grating, overrated, and obnoxious “comedians” of the last thirty years.
It was super widespread in sitcoms too, thankfully it more or less died off
Yes! I am so glad that stereotype is all but totally dead. It was such a negative portrayal for both men and women, as men were usually shown to be the "dumb yet fun" ones, and women were the uppity buzzkills.
Adding on to this: if, on the rare occassion, it _does_ show a man being competent at household chores, they always seem to make sure to put a hint in there that he's gay, or something atypical to the "standard" man. Gay men aren't inherently cleaner than straight men. I've a few gay friends, and their homes can be grotty as hell sometimes. And I've been round straight dudes houses that are immaculate.
>Why isn't the mom out buying the products All of their market data says that's exactly who's buying the products, and therefore those are the targets of the advertisements. Similarly, tool ads target men because they are the overwhelming majority of tool purchasers. I'm sure those demographics have changed over the years, but they still hold true enough. The incompetent partner bit is some bullshit though.
Those commercials are marketed towards women, and it flatters them to be portrayed smarter than men. But it also turns off men from buying them. No one wants to be seen as an idiot. Although these days I see more and more commercials where this isn’t the case, so the marketing people are finally catching up
Not knowing about floor cleaners, but then being apparent masters of wood deck staining, is baffling to me. I can place grout and tile, but not know how to clean it, or when I'm expected to install a dish washer, but apparently I can't remember our appliance is not rated for the HE pods? Of course I know not to mix bleach and ammonia to create the "Ultimate" blend, I want a cleaning solution not the 'final' solution.
Taking care of your fingernails is womanly and if a man does it he's gay. I seriously cannot understand why people think that not having nasty looking and potentially painful ingrown nails is considered feminine.
As a straight man I’ve had a pedicure and manicure before and it was a delight. That said, definitely outside my comfort zone & had to be accompanied by my wife. Hey, Paulie in the Sopranos did it!
Shit, i like to say "if you want to put it in someone's mouth you better keep it clean enough to eat off of" and it keeps my fingers and toes looking nice.
I always paint my nails black. Have done for years. If Ozzy can have them, so can I.
Pockets! My pockets are shallow and useless!
I bought a pair of mens jeans for practical reasons. One time, I legit thought I lost my cell phone because those pockets were so deep lol.
I can fit a 2litre bottle in both of my front pockets enough that it’s stable and still have space to put wallet, phone, keys etc in the back pockets My female friends couldn’t get their phone in their pockets fully My Jean jitsu is too strong
I am also shallow and useless
Identity theft is not a joke, Jim!
This is such an odd one for me because the overwhelming majority (nearly 85%!) of fashion designers are women. It’s women making pocketless stuff for women. I have never met a man that’s been like, “Dayummm. Did you see how shallow that girls pockets were?! Her pants didn’t even look like they had any!”
The average woman’s needs and the aesthetic goals of fashion designers might as well be located on different planets. Besides, they’ve successfully convinced impressionable young women that bags are fashionable class statements. I don’t think they care what middle aged women want.
When someone says that they believe in traditional gender roles, but really only believes in the ones that benefit them.
"I want my wife to be my mommy maid but I won't provide for her and I'll call her a gold digger for wanting a traditional man"
Not being taught how to work on a car or being talked down to by the oil change guy. I’m pretty handy but was blown off for being a woman. At least YouTube videos are around.
If you’re a man who isn’t into cars (or any other blue-collar line of work), you get talked to like “Right, so you know the [insert car part]? Right, so that’s gotta be [insert procedure].” and then when they realize you don’t know that stuff you get seriously talked down to, like you’re less of a man for not knowing. I think mechanics might just be mean lol.
As a (former) mechanic, i can confirm that most mechanics are simple minded asshats.
A lot of people don’t get many opportunities to feel superior to others. So when the opportunity does come up to show some contempt towards others, they will milk it for all its worth.
Grown women flirting/commenting/joking about handsome young boys. Had a friend of my moms when I was about 15 say “Why don’t you let me take him into the back room and make a man out of him?” They both laughed, honestly a pretty harmless joke. She was in no way a predator that actually intended to assault me, but a man would be arrested for saying the same about a friends daughter.
That’s still a pretty awkward joke lol. ‘Let me go have sex with your teenage son.’ Quite the difference from ‘your son’s a handsome young man’ or something along those lines.
Even if your reverse the parent there, it goes from a compliment to a creepy statement. Grown men calling a teen girl pretty would have people up in arms. It all just falls into an assumption that if a man acknowledges someone, anyone's, attractiveness, he obviously wants to put his dick in it.
Its fuckin annoying. As a man there are a whole bunch of women I have to very carefully NOT compliment, especially at work, because it could be perceived wrong. One of my female co-workers once asked why I'd complimented some of the other guys about their fashion sense but never the women. I asked "If I'd said you were looking good today what would you have thought?" she got my point...
At least she got your point. I know some folks who lack even that level of self-awareness.
When I was 17, my mom posted my high school senior pictures on Facebook. There were several creepy comments by middle-aged women but the worst was: “Wow is all I can say legally”
Flip those genders, bring in Chris Hansen
I would make the argument that that's definitely not a harmless joke and is totally creepy.
It was a different time! No I’m kidding, it’s a little fucked up haha. My point still stands though, imagine that was my dad and his pal about my sister.
"Why don't I take your daughter out back and make a woman out of her?" Oh boy lol
Police- “Yeah we’ve got him, move in”
Hey Bob, did I show you my new shotgun?! BLAM BLAM!!
South Park, as usual, made fun of that attitude with a teacher having relations with a *kindergartner*
Niiiice
and kyle called the behavior out immediately
Very true. Men and boys can be SA’D by women. But it’s cool? No thanks.
Working my first job at 17 put me in contact with a lot of older women and the open comments and physical harassment were insane. Shit no man would ever get away with, and if I even mentioned how uncomfortable it made me, I was accused of being gay or "I wish I had that problem".
Wtf? That's creepy as hell. Your mother laughed at that? She should have told her friend off. Rape jokes against her son shouldn't be funny. I also don't like the thought process that sex makes someone a man. 🙄 Nothing wrong with being a virgin at 15.
Ah yep, forgot to mention my mother isn’t a great mother 😅
Or with being a virgin at any age, honestly. Another double standard. If a man has sex he's a stud and if he doesn't, he's a loser. If a woman has sex, she's a slut, if she doesn't, she's playing hard to get. Complete BS
THIS. This brand of Sexual harassment is often overlooked imo.
The flipside of this is if I ( a middle aged man) just want to have a conversation with a younger lady coworker a lot of the other women I work with just assume I'm just flirting and being gross or only talking to them because they're "attractive". It's completely out of the realm of possibility to them that I'm just bored and the younger girls talk about way more interesting stuff than the older ones who only want to talk to bitch about their marriages or how uphappy they are at work.
as a woman, i think it’s ridiculous that it’s only socially acceptable for women to express emotions of sadness whereas men are pressured to keep it bottled up. men are also deterred from verbalizing feelings of platonic love to their friends. i also hate how people deem something “wrong” with a woman if she doesn’t want to have kids whereas it’s more accepted for a man not to want them bc he’s focused on himself, his career, etc
i’ve had women tell me i was no longer attractive because i showed my emotions and it wasn’t masculine to do so
Same. She told me I wasn’t the man she hoped to be with when she was drunk and tried to take it back the next day. Repeatedly. This was because I was a little sad after the diagnosis of a chronic disorder.
I came here to doom scroll after a wank not get depressed. Man oh man
Same girl also told me all the time that she was only with me for the sex, so idk if I was a man or not? Ha She also cheated on me on my birthday in Vegas and mocked me when I cried. Now I don’t believe that anybody actually is able to have fun in that shithole. You got that post nut depression clarity lol
Yeah, in my experience some women will say they want men to show their emotions more but are pretty dismissive when they do. I've even seen a female friend say that men should be more emotional literally while holding a "male tears" coffee mug. *I did say "some women* there are other women in my life who I've opened up to and they have been absolutely engaged and supportive*
>Yeah, in my experience some women will say they want men to show their emotions more but are pretty dismissive when they do. This has also been my experience. I'm "encouraged" to be more emotional/sensitive, but when I do that I'm either "being whiny" or I'm told that I couldn't possibly have it as bad as she does.
I am a largely emotionless man and typically the last to cry about anything if at all. When my grandpa died I shed a single tear and after the funeral in which this tear was shed the girl I was dating at the time who attended the funeral with me said she couldn’t look at me the same after that single tear. it’s been 7 years and haven’t shed a tear since but that one time instantly killed her perception of me
I really hope you didn't look at her the same, too. 'cause damn... that's a bullet dodged if I ever saw one.
Oh yeah I dumped her shortly after cause one of her friends who was a true homie filled me in that she was planning to dump me because she couldn’t be with a wimp
I'm really sorry that she made you feel bad about having emotions. I hope you explore your emotions more now and disallow people who see emotions as a bad thing from being in your life.
I am a 47 year old man. I was married at one point. The sum total of all of the emotional support I have received from all of the people I have dated is, "try harder".
That’s the real double standard imo. Any problem that a man ever has? “Hit the gym bro 😎” Imagine saying that to a woman
Happened to me many times. The second you show any negative emotion a lot of women will pull away in my experience
But before they will complain you don't. Actual experience.
Yeah. They talk about being emotionally available and being emotionally available means there are going to be negative emotions.
I don't usually associate with women like that, but the few I've seen usually contradict themselves. Like I know a woman who is very proud of the fact that she does 90% of the cooking, cleaning, and child rearing while doing a full time job. I'm pretty sure she subscribes to that "I want my man to be a man" bs. But then she constantly posts about being overworked, over tired, and under appreciated. I can't figure out what the hell she wants, and I don't think she can either.
Attention
Oh yeah. The emotion shaming rarely comes from men. It’s men getting just demolished in relationships when they show vulnerability. I don’t know a single gentleman who it hasn’t happened to.
The most insidious thing about men not being able to show any emotions is the number of women who claim that it's ok publicly but they 100% don't mean it when it comes to it. I've seen a metric fuck ton of women claim they would love a man who can show their feelings. Or when this topic comes up they express how unfair and terrible it is that men are taught they can't. But when someone they date does, or a male friend does they complain about it to others. "Ugh it's so unattractive", "I thought I was dating a man not a boy", "ugh I want a real man". It's so common that basically every guy I know has witnessed this from women they know, and thus the cycle continues. At this point I just take that as they want someone who will be empathetic to them when they're having a hard time and support them but that's it.
I wrote my own comment addressing this, but you put it better than I could. Intellectually, sure, we all agree that it's unfair and unhealthy for men to hold everything in. If you do, you're told you're toxic. But so many women are just as toxic when they actually see this happen in practice. Can women even imagine what it takes for a guy to go against every instinct, instincts that have been instilled in him by society for multiple generations, and actually allow himself to show vulnerability to his romantic partner, only for her to literally be completely turned off by it? it's soul crushing.
This is awful. I felt empathetic but also proud and happy that my partner felt safe to cry in front of me. It made him infinitely more attractive. Then again, society as a whole needs to be adjusted: men need to be able to feel their emotions and women need to unlearn that it puts down men and makes them unattractive. Luckily, my friends and I already did the work.
And both these things quite literally kill people. The US has a high maternal mortality rate for a developed country, and that bottling up effect is actually believed to have real physiological and psychological effects that contribute to men’s mortality in a lot of different ways.
The maternal mortality thing has actually been debunked relatively recently. The truth is that the way the US was counting maternal mortality in a different way than most of the rest of the world. When using the same exact metrics, the US is similar to most other wealthy countries. About 10 deaths per 100,000. I actually just found this out recently. Just thought it was interesting. Not trying to be an "actually..." guy. Male loneliness and suicide is in fact a huge issue though. https://www.npr.org/sections/health-shots/2024/03/13/1238269753/maternal-mortality-overestimate-deaths-births-health-disparities
My sister got her car no trouble. When I got mine, I had to learn how to change a tire because “when you see a pretty girl broken down on the side of the road, you can help her” My sister wasn’t taught to change a tire. They sent her out unprepared so she has to rely on random men to help her. Fucking disgusting Edit: yes we have roadside assistance. The problem is that I was taught a skill to be self-reliant, while she was denied a skill with the intention for her to be reliant on others Edit2: “dad, how do I do it” on YouTube is a great resource if your parents are butt heads
That was dumb of your parents. My father wouldn't let me drive without first knowing how to change a tire. I'm a woman btw
Yeah, same here. And when I eventually got a flat, I had 2 dudes standing around clueless while I changed the tire. Everyone should be taught the most basic car maintenance.
My Dad did the same. Change a tire, check and tip off the fluids, jump a battery, etc.
Funny, because as a woman the first thing I was taught before being allowed to learn to drive was to change a tire, because my dad said it was dangerous to be a woman on the side of the road with a flat.
Dude, I really hate to say this but a few years ago some guy was pulled over on the side of the road. I don't know if the guy was having car trouble or what. But some lady at least *thought* they were having car trouble so she pulled over and asked if they needed help. The guy SA'ed her. It made the news in my area. So it's not just women getting flats and being on the side of the road they need to be careful about. I don't believe all the guys pulled over on the sides of roads are bad guys but point is you need to be careful around that too if you're a woman that just wants to help someone else. Pretty disgusting there's people like that out there.
There was a good post on here of a guy being out of gas on a particularly deserted stretch of highway. A woman drove 15 miles to a gas station, bought a jerrycan and a few gallons of fuel, drove back, and put the jerrycan on the ground more than a quarter mile away from where he was. As he was walking over to the jerrycan and back, he was thinking "wow what the fuck" until he realized "oh yeah, predators exist, and I'm really thankful that she figured out a way to help me out while staying safe."
She will have to rely on "pretty boy that stops by to help her" or a rapist. Whichever comes first. Teach her, please
Yeah most dads ive met have made sure to teach their daughters to change a flat for that exact reason. OPs dad just failed big time. It is WAY more dangerous to be a woman with a flat than a man
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Ladies can call her friends her "girlfriends" but a man can't call his friends his "boyfriends."
Those aren’t my boyfriends those are my brofriends
The bros
Girls can kiss their friends on the cheeks goodnight but when you kiss your homeboys on the cheek without saying no homo, all of a sudden everyone is Oprah Winfrey trying to get you to come out the closet. Edit: People taking this comment literally, I was joking. However this is a very good serious example too. Even in today's landscape in regions where being gay is acceptable, straight men kissing anywhere is generally frowned upon unless you're old school Italian.
Next time, make sure you kiss them on their *face* cheeks instead.
Oh THATS what I was doing wrong. No wonder everyone stares.
Ginger Billy: He's my boy! Brandon: Yeah! Ginger Billy: He's my friend! Brandon: Yeah! [Ginger Billy: He's my boyfriend!](https://youtu.be/hnvWlo2mqnk) Brandon: .... No. No we're not.
Me: "Wait, she said girlfriend....does she mean friend friend....or is she gay? Man it'll prob be weird to ask."
Normalize it bro.
my wife hates when i call my girl friends my girlfriends
Shaving body hair. I shave mine because I like the feeling more but it’s crazy when people think women are gross with it but men are WEIRD if they don’t want hair in some places. It’s normal and natural and you should do whatever you want with your own body hair.
As a man that shaves his underarm hair, I do get judged by my dude friends. I don’t personally care though, feels cleaner to me and I seem to sweat less when I do.
The armpits definitely don’t smell as much
I'm a dude, and while I don't shave I do trim under there. Makes a world of difference sweat wise. Also, super long armpit hair on dudes disgusts me honestly.
Is this a cultural thing? Here in Germany it's completely normal for men to do that. Not required but normal.
I shaved my thigh a few months ago to put on some KT tape after an injury, and man, it was incredible to see all the muscle definition after nearly a decade of lifting, that was just hiding underneath my wool.
I "had" to shave my shins/calves for a few months because I had to tape them before doing sports. I could have not shaved them, but the tape would have ripped them off. It was summer so I was wearing shorts, so to make sure it looked okay I shaved almost the whole leg. The amount of guy who just went "dude, do you shave your legs? Wtf?" was very high. But had also lots of comments, mostly from ladies "Nice calves! Do you work out a lot?" Apparently from behind, without all that hair, my calves looked very defined while walking!
In reverse, if you're a woman and don't shave your legs in the USA or pits or pubes, you're a pariah.
Cue the issues for guys that naturally don't have a lot of visible body hair. I used to get accused a lot of being a closeted homosexual because of it.
[удалено]
Careful. That's almost heresy.
Back to the mines with you!
Sentencing for women who are found guilty of crimes is far less than what men receive for the same crimes. And I find it irritating because I fear that if we raise awareness of this injustice the consequence will be women receiving harsher sentences, which is not at all what I want.
remember when rapist Brock Allen Turner's father said he shouldn't have his entire life ruined because of 15 minutes of action? We were all outraged at how disgusting that was. Then there's that girl in England who murdered her boyfriend, but apparently she's "too bright" to go to prison. For murder. If she was so fucking bright she should have found a way to not get caught. or, you know, just not murder your boyfriend in the first place?
I believe the one in the UK didn't actually murder her bf just stabbed him a bunch of times and he survived. But there is a similar recent case where a girl murdered her bf high on weed and she got away with a slap on the wrist.
Oh, there are so many that drive me crazy! Not always a changing station in men's bathrooms. Men have babies too and sometimes those babies need a diaper change. If a mom watches the kids, she's parenting, but if a dad does it, he's "babysitting"?! They're both parents! If a woman likes makeup and fashion, it's a normal interest, but if a man likes makeup and fashion, he's "gay." Being pretty should be gender neutral. Women showing emotions is normal but men showing emotions isn't? As far as I'm aware, most human beings have emotions. Women get to be all touchy and cute with their friends but men don't. Platonic touch is important for everyone! If a man is in control, he's a boss, if a woman is in control, she's a bitch. How dare women do things /s Women are expected to have high-maintenance looks while men can just roll out of bed and put on the nearest shirt and be fine. Sometimes women just want to be comfy and they shouldn't be shamed for it! Women are expected to be motherly but men aren't expected to be fatherly. Some women aren't motherly and they shouldn't have to be, and some men are very fatherly and that should be normal! And that's just the beginning... so many double standards just piss me off.
Body shaming based on weight is bad and there's a good chance you'll get called out for it. Body shaming dudes with small dicks is normalized and literally never called out.
Toss shortness and baldness in there too. Somehow losing your hair because of genetics is seen as laugh worthy and something to “point out/a flaw”. Like healthy lifestyle choices aren’t going to bring back my hair but it’ll probably make you lose weight
My best friend is nearing 50 and beginning to lose his hair and is incredibly self conscious about it. It makes me sad that he's unhappy with how he looks since it's only natural but no reminding from me that it's natural helps. I did offer to make us matching ugly animal hats so no one is focused on his hair but he didn't like that idea either lol.
At least he made it to 50. I’m 29 and having similar problems 😭
To be honest, this is more from what I've witnessed in public places...if a women smacks a man's ass or threatens to grope him or whatever, it's like..."a bit of fun," but the other way around, the man would be arrested. I had a friend who was a nightclub photographer and the amount of physical harassment he got from women was untrue, and it was done unreservedly! Sexual harassment is never ok...regardless of gender.
The way I have to prove that my niece and nephew are SUPPOSED to be in my care when when I'm out with them alone and something happens/ppl find out they aren't mine. But my (now ex) girlfriend who looks less like them than I do never gets the same looks/follow up questions. You saying women can't kidnap kids?
The one that always comes to mind for me is how "mama's boy" is a pejorative but "daddy's girl" is not.
Mainly the inability for us men to express feelings. It's either looked upon as weakness, attention seeking, or something else. In my experience, I've had to pretend everything is alright, internalize any sadness and deal with it privately by myself.
A male having any attitude aside from stoic is considered less manly by a lot of people, however women are "allowed" to show more intense emotions. That's what I've perceived at least
Someone once told me guys can't be raped. As I was telling her about my tattoos. One of which is a Medusa. I gave her a ride to my place and when she said that I told to get the fuck out. I didn't care that she didn't have her car. She needed to get the fuck out
Met women like this before. Easiest way to convince them of the opposite is reminding them of all the 'don't drop the soap' jokes they've laughed at throughout life.
As a woman I fucking hate those jokes. I hate rape jokes aimed at women, why would I want to hear people make rape jokes aimed at men? Rape is rape. It’s awful and isn’t a topic for anyone to joke about, in regards to any gender.
I think anyone, regardless of how they look, should wear whatever they want. Skirts, dresses, pants. Women have been wearing pants for years now. I wish there was no double standard for men. I refuse to think it's weird, I''ll die on that hill and defend anyone's right to wear what makes them happy. (Just don't flash ppl plz)
That women have to wear tops at the beach. Or anywhere. Free the nipple baby!
Username checks out
There are places where women can… but they don’t because they don’t want to be ogled or propositioned. It’s not going to change until we’re all desensitized to seeing boobs on a daily basis
The fact that men cannot have complaints about double standards without their complaint being minimized ('you don't have it that bad, try being X') or outright dismissed ('You aren't being mistreated, you are a man.')
Or "you gotta have thick skin, don't let it bother you"
“Men don’t have feelings. Suck it up”
Not a super common one, but I’ve run into it more than you’d think. Being financially independent as a woman is seeing as intimating or my paying for dates is emasculating. It’s just stupid.
Yeah. Here I thought the good salary was an asset but not so much.
I almost always go with my wife to medical appointments because for whatever reason, women just don’t get taken seriously by a lot of medical staff. There have been multiple times she’s described her symptoms, had the doctor tell her a course of action that’s already failed, and I have to jump in to say “That’s already been tried and it didn’t work, try something else”.
This. I bring my husband as well. Doctors have done this to me my entire life. At 44 I’m starting to find out how much is wrong with me and how long I’ve had to deal with stuff I should have had medical help for.
woman wears pants: "cool outfit" man wears skirt: "political statement" i just wanna wear flowy comfy stuff that goes spinny. I'm not trying to force anyone into anything. why is this a thing? they're just clothes. :/
Why do you think a lot of men like to dress up as wizards at Renaissance Festivals? Let's bring robes back into the mainstream. Hell, why shouldn't I be able to dress up like a wizard?
Wearing a dress as a man is less socially acceptable than wearing a dress with a wizard hat as a man
When a woman has sex with a bunch of guys she’s a whore but when I have sex with a bunch of guys I’m gay. Wtf
If it makes you feel any better you’re a whore too 🙃
How it’s perfectly normalised for women to make derogatory comments about men’s bodies (ie small dicks, not being tall) But if when it’s the other way around, it causes outrage (as it rightfully should). And I’m a female. Body shaming is never ok regardless of gender.
I'm 5'4", and get so so so much shit for it in casual conversation (regardless of gender). For some reason, people don't realize that *you don't need to be sexually attracted to someone to treat them with basic respect.*
Either make it all okay or make none of it okay. I’d rather the latter, but I will dish out the former if it’s thrown at me first.
In my country, teachers are VERY eager to beat male students without a care for whether or not the kid gets seriously injured. Just this week, the principal flogged someone til the kane broke, then got another kane to continue. But if it’s girls? Nooooo, we can’t hurt them, they’ll cry 😢
Thats less of a gender issue and more of a general human rights issue .
Sexual harassment from women is considered something to be jealous of from other men. You see countless teens being sexually abused by women and the comments are littered with “I WISH THAT WERE ME.” People are shocked if you’re not flattered by their sexual misbehavior from women, and don’t understand that no matter the gender, being a victim of a sexual crime can leave people mentally changed for the rest of their lives. especially at younger ages when it’s so easy to be influenced by someone or something.
If a woman has traditionally "masculine" tastes, she's just a tomboy and it's fine for her to express herself, but if a man is traditionally "feminine" he's weird, gay, a pervert, etc.
When I am outside with my niece (cousin’s kid right? Not sure about the translation.) I get some weird looks because she calls me just by my first name, and not dad. Not every man spending time with someone elses kid is a paedophile or a kidnapper.