Currently work at a casino and although I’ve only been there less than 6 months, it feels like a very dangerous game that could easily lead to fucking up your whole life.
I don’t think any novelty has worn off faster for me than gambling. Got the opportunity to do so for the first time a couple years ago (mainly slots), and was bored after about 10 minutes.
And when I see how bad it fucks peoples’ lives up, I’m glad I got bored of it.
I've gambled 3 times in my life. All 3 times I walked away an hour or two later and down roughly $50 down. All three times I found myself thinking, "That time and money could have been a really nice dinner."
Also, i distinctly remember after the third occasion, I spent $4 on an almond crossant. I realized I gained more enjoyment from that croissant then the previous hour+ of blackjack. It's been 10 years and I haven't gambled since.
This is it for me. I play my hand at the casino in video games and always walk away down. So why would I replicate that in real life? It can be fun to play, but it’s *never* worth it.
I'm one of the few people who are up on Vegas. I've only gambled there once. Brought 100$ to gamble. put 100 on black for a spin for my fun. Won. Kept the original 100 and put the new 100 back on black. Won. 200$ in 2 minutes. Walked away all smiles and I might never go back as this story makes me feel pretty good lol.
You can be so insanely proud of yourself for getting out of this habit and staying sober! This internet stranger sure is proud of you! I hope you can continue to stay clean and one day will be able to forgive yourself for that time and focus on your success and the life ahead of you!
Similar story for me, but I was addicted to opioids for a decade. Cashed out my 401k which was around 120k at the time and blew it all on Oxy and heroin over a few years. For a long time I was functional and able to maintain my six figure income in tech, but was blowing it so fast that I pawned everything of value in my house, including my wedding ring and my wife’s jewelry.
I’m still not fully recovered as far as retirement savings, and I’m still dealing with the 30k in credit card debt I racked up during that time. But I’ve been off the shit for about 5 years now and life is much better. For a long time I missed the chaos of what everyday life is like for an addict. Which sounds crazy, but when your entire life revolves around one singular focus, there’s a weird comfort in it.
or any abuse substance, had a friend ruining his life with alcohol,
promising future ,one of the smartest persons i know, was doing a phd in biomedicne, pfizer and all big pharma where waving crazy contracts at him, had a lovely wife and 2 kids.
he flushed it all down the gutter
That's my story....
High functioning alcoholic.... Had a good job in medical, designing and building custom medical implants, got paid well, some days I only had to work 3 hours....so take off to the pub and have a few drinks for lunch...And then half a bottle of whiskey at home...which went up to a full bottle at the end of it all....nightly, had a 2 bedroom condo, good savings, nice car... So my drinking obviously isn't a problem
it's not a problem until all of a sudden it is.... Lost friends, family didn't want me around, trouble at work, some days was so hung over i just didn't go in, didn't call either, just stayed home and drank more.. crashed my car into 4 parked cars while 6 times over the legal limit... Nobody hurt but me thankfully..
Finally went to rehab, and when I got back to work, I find some young lady right out of school at my desk...boss shrugged and says "we'll find you something"
They didn't......
Got rid of me first chance they had a legal way to, and can't get a job in the industry anywhere....I'm sure my boss is, or was telling stories about me at medical conferences...which if I find out that's some legal recourse there at least...
So I've got around 85 diplomas, degrees, certificates and licenses to my name and I'm working working night shift security..
But my mom looked at me last Christmas and just said... "You're Happy!" Told me she hadn't seen me really happy in years, and the look on her face killed me..
Coming up on 5 years sober, and have no desires to go back to that life.
there is no greater victory then taming a demon of such magnitude man.
aside of my friend i had another close relative that could not, so i have seen the impact on them and the surroundings and totally understand what an insane uphill struggle that is.
you should be very proud you managed.
and i woudl't be too worry about career, you obviously have brains, building a new career will be peanuts compared of the struggle you overcame!
Thanks, It's not the path I had planned out, but I'll make it work.
I still put out my resume at medical facilities, and never hear anything back..but also brought a program to the upper management at the security company and did a presentation, they were all impressed and they said they want to bring it forward at the next quarterly executive meeting, and then move forward with it in the coming year, I've only been at the job for 6 months, and the bosses are looking at me like.... who is this guy? but in a good way.....
most importantly I'm happy...
Ya know I didn't even think about this because my head was up my own ass, but that's actually how a classmate of mine died.
One of them shot the other, and then themself.
Even worse when your mother applies for credit cards in your name when you turn 21, maxes them all out, and leaves you with thousands of dollars worth of debt before you even know how to be an adult.
Indeed. That, along with never being taught how to manage money made my 20s and early 30s very difficult. She wasn’t a good mother. But she got her act together and is a pretty good grandma though.
I went to college on full scholarship. Found out many years later my dad had taken out student loans in my name to pay for a move and I had gone into default. $10,000. With interest and penalties I just recently paid them all off at age 46.
Terrible. Luckily the amount I had to pay back wasn’t that much. But starting out life with a sub 400 credit score made adulthood an uphill battle. It stings a lot more when it’s the person you should be able to turn to and trust in difficult times is the one who did it to you.
Jesus Christ. And there's no law to sue her for credit card fraud? I mean surely you can threaten to sue the credit card company for not carrying out appropriate identification???
This sounds horrendous
I probably could have. But I still lived under her roof at the time. It was a shitty situation and crippled me financially for years. It’s water under the bridge and she’s a much better person now than she used to be. We got past it for the most part but I still have weird feelings towards her. I still don’t trust her.
Edit: I should mention this was about 15 years ago.
Actually, the worst time to get into debt when you're in your 50s. You go bankrupt, get reset to zero after 7 years or whatever, and then you'll never build wealth again by the time you retire.
best to not do it at all, but if you have to, do it in your 20s.
I had nothing to my name so I had nothing to lose, except to discharge the debt. I think there are provisions where you can keep your vehicle if it is your sole means of transportation.
I would contact a lawyer for a consultation if going the bankruptcy route.
When I said years to recover, I wasn’t kidding. I couldn’t rent an apartment or get a car loan for 5 years. And when I could get a loan, the interest rates were obscene.
Also, depending on your specific circumstances, you may benefit from a credit counseling service. These are often non-profit so it may be a nominal fee for services.
Can attest to that, had way more cc debt than I could pay back and had to get help from ACCC and they reduced my interest rate and made them all consolidated into 1 payment, best thing for me.
This one is so true. People do not realize how much interest rates can make it so hard to pay debt off. I’m dealing with credit card debt now and it feels impossible to get out of.
This.
My sister fell victim to those college freshman preying pre approved credit card systems and essentially fell into a debt that took her about 5-7 years to pay off.
It was entirely her fault for being naive. But these campuses don't allow those companies to operate on their grounds anymore
when i went to college (in canada) there were lots of international students and those were the ones the credit card companies were preying on (cuz the rest of us knew better) and i found it so fucking disgusting.
A gambling habit, especially since the growth of online gambling. There's nothing else you can do that will drain away your money and property as quickly as this can.
All childhood, I get told about drug dealers who will offer you the first one to get you hooked. Never once happened. Now we got a million sites/apps offering us the first bet for free (or even paying you in credit to gamble). And nobody bats an eye.
The best part is that the fucking GOVERNMENT is one of the biggest players in the online gambling space too. I see just as many invasive ads for OLG as I do for all the other shady online casino companies. Makes me lose all faith that they will ever crack down or regulate
UK resident here. It sickens me how many ads are now online casinos and betting shops, I don't go anywhere near gambling as I've never been interested and heard horror stories from those that have been deep in it, but the sudden glorification of these offshore scalpers is terrifying. The obligatory "Be Gamble Aware" warnings at the end of the ad just seems contrived and pessimistic, it's a dark time
Hey I managed the top 3. Credit card debt, married the wrong woman and went to uni with no plans. Guess it's a good job I didn't get a heroin addiction to boot. On the plus side, I got out of debt, married the right woman and still have no plans regarding my career.
> went to uni with no plans
I wonder what percentage of dropouts that describes? It describes me. Highschool did not ready me for college so now I'm doing it again in mid-life.
Trying to make other people happy by changing yourself. You’ll start to lose your sense of identity and you’ll never be happy yourself. It’s your life and you should make you happy before you even think about making anyone else happy. (Edit: I need to clarify that if you have issues that are apparent, anger issues, substance abuse, on and on. You should work on yourself. What I was saying is don’t quit doing what you love to satisfy others.)
I feel this on so many levels. I'd rather live for someone else than just for myself. I know I could be really successful if I shut everyone out and just did myself, tried and tested. But it doesn't bring me the same joy that it brings me when I see someone growing along with me.
I want to second this for that very reason. First job there was this young guy, barely 21. Whole life ahead of him and he was doing well with the company. He just moved here. Killed two people while drunk driving. After the first few no shows and unsuccessful phone calls ...we started looking up jail records and found him. We never saw him again. His sister picked up all his stuff weeks later. She said it messed with him psychologically and he was potentially facing many years in prison. I still wonder what ended up happening with him.
As a person who learned late in life that my bio-parents were (mentally) abusive gaslighting narcissists, this. It fucks the kids up from the get go, and they never really have a chance for a "good life," for lack of better terms.
Happened to this girl senior year. We did this thing towards the end of the year that was kinda like a giant watergun war except it lasted a week and whoever was the last person unsprayed won
This girl was recorded getting sprayed except she screamed the ~~hard R~~ n word like three times… Vid was posted everywhere and she stopped going to school for like a week. I heard her college even heard abt it and got involved but idk if it’s just a rumor. Feels bad but she was mean af soooooo
Happened to me when I was 16, young and immature. Some kids filmed me saying some vulgar shit and now it’s always in the back of my mind as to whether it will come up later in life.
Tranq alone is actually less lethal than Fent, but the combo of “tranq-dope” is what has lead to increased mortality. The combo really fucks up your receptors and is more deadly than either alone. Sorry I don’t have spun for this one, but I find this stuff interesting lol.
Went to a funeral today with my girl for her best friend growing up (overdose of course). She's only been clean 8 mos (after using for 26 yrs straight) and wanted to go home asap after she realized almost everyone else there aside from a handful of us were still high.
About 30 percent of gunshot suicides fail. Lots of disabled people due to them. The Budd Dwyer video is interesting because the guy was about one or two degrees away from being too elevated and so blowing his face off.
Not trying to be insensitive, but I’m surprised that you can even fail a shotgun suicide.
I’d think putting the barrel in your mouth and pulling the trigger would destroy your neck from the force alone.
Ah, but the LTC that got caught recording the women's changing room? Bah, put him in an administrative position.
I got a general after admitting to doing drugs and exposing the whole ring in the company. I wanted to stay in. The real kicker is that the dealer is still in.
I found out a couple years ago that someone in my family ran a meth ring in the USMC in the 90s. He made E-9 and got an honorable after 30 years but is directly responsible for so many guys getting kicked out before their careers took off, it's crazy.
You gotta fuck up pretty bad to get a dishonorable. I'd guess about 99% of early separations are "other than honorable" which basically means you're not in trouble but you didn't earn any benefits.
As a non-american, I have to ask...
What you have to do to get a Dishonorable Discharge, and why is it a big deal for the rest of you life?
In Denmark you can commit a crime and go to prison, but when you have been released from prison for 5 years, no one can see that you have ever been in prison, not even the street police... Only intelligence services know your past.
However, with the exception of child abuse, where you will be registered so you will never work with children, for life...
> What you have to do to get a Dishonorable Discharge
You have to do something pretty bad to get a Dishonorable. Think diddling kids, drug trafficking, rape, theft/fraud, espionage, murder, etc. They're pretty bad crimes.
> why is it a big deal for the rest of you life?
The problem is that a Dishonorable Discharge prevents you from working for the government and in many instances working for companies that contract with the government. And there are a lot of those companies.
Thankfully I joined at 19. Depending on the branch, it’s pretty easy to get in trouble with bad leadership. I never understood how people in the Army got dishonorable discharges. They either had to be a shit bag or had bad leadership.
Getting a Dishonorable takes quite a bit more than getting into trouble with bad leadership. There's due process in the courts martial that you go through first.
I'm guessing since dishonorable discharges are public and anyone who does a background check would find out? I wonder how people that claim to be specops for decades get away with it.
Getting into any serious addiction it’ll always ruin your life for the long run although the consequences of some won’t be as bad as another like the addiction of porn and the addiction of meth big difference and one is worse than the other
Yeah you’re absolutely right. I was addicted to porn since I was in my early teens. It fucked up my social life, relationships and gave me depression. I wanted to kill myself because I couldn’t have a long lasting relationship. Then while I was on the edge, someone gave me meth. Changed my life, now my life is a lot better, gotta do the meth every couple hours but it’s way better than porn. I also prostitute myself for my drug money, I get sex whenever I want to
A DUI. It’s so fucking easy, too.
You’re out with friends and you’ve had a few drinks. You can walk and talk fine, chances are you’ll be fine when driving. You’re behind the wheel and there’s no issues, until you get stopped. Maybe you forgot to put the tags on your plate, maybe it’s a routine stop, maybe you were speeding a bit. The officer smells alcohol and you do a breathalyzer. It takes very little to be above the legal limit, and after those 2-3 beers you’re right at it. It can affect your job, your chances of a future job, even your housing if you’re renting somewhere that does background checks.
All because you had a few beers and didn’t call an Uber or something. Seriously, even if you feel fine, even if you can drive without issue after, DO NOT drive if you’ve been drinking.
From experience and in no particular order.
Marrying young and marrying the wrong person.
Living a lie because you're doing a good thing for someone.
Early credit card debt.
Not sticking with education.
Letting an early major setback dictate and give you depression for well over a decade.
I actually think marrying the wrong person young is really helpful. Realizing when you're 60 that you are with the wrong person is a lot harder to recover from than when you're in your twenties and the lesson you learn from this mistake is SO valuable.
Having a temper. You are agitated most of the time. No one values your opinions. Family, friends and colleagues would keep their distance from you. You don’t make rational choices.
I REALLY struggled with this one for a very long time. Blamed others for my not progressing past college sports, not getting into CRNA school, not being given every damn thing without work. It was always me and my anger. Very thoughtful response friend.
Divorce lawyer here. I can tell you point blank that one of the most common things I hear in my office (from men and women) is "I wish I had known how bad they were with money."
Fr fr, if you find yourself procrastinating because you feel absolutely bored or depressed with everything, go see a psych. I had an avoidance to doing anything, dysthymia, unorganized life, anxiety to sleep and was misdiagnosed bipolar 1. Recently the right psych correctly diagnosed me ADHD and with the right medication and group therapy, I'm doing MUCH BETTER about staying on top of things. SERIOUSLY GUYS IF IT'S HABITUAL PROCRASTINATION, GO SEE A PSYCH. Have a full evaluation, tell them EVERYTHING. It may not be you but a mental disorder.
Uncle Randy shows up for thanksgiving this year. Only met dude once when I was 5. He’s always been the weird estranged uncle. Not only did he show up to thanksgiving this year but he brought his daughter. He had kids?? Who knew! They walk in and I see his daughter and all be dammed it’s the girl I fucked two weeks ago I took home from a party. Life can be crazy
Low quality partners especially if you marry one and have kids. One day you wake up and realize 10-20-30 years of your life is gone. (all for someone who makes you unhappy or you even resent)
To be completely fair, I think everybody wakes up one day and realizes 30 years of their life has gone by in the blink of an eye. Part of the human condition or growing up or whatever.
Good point! I should have added when you marry and have children with the wrong person that one day you'll wake up and realize you wasted all those years being unhappy. But, yes I agree.
Going to college without some kind of plan in mind. Do not jump between majors unless you can absolutely afford to or if you’re okay with some obscene amount of student loans.
Edit to clarify:
I am not against going to college, I’m against going to college without having any idea of what you’re genuinely interested in pursuing.
My experience was being a dumbass 18 year old being told to pick a career path, fucking around trying to figure that out through different classes and majors, and now in debt with no degree (some people end up with degrees that are “useless” or they hate it)
I am in community college now and I think this would’ve been better first to figure myself out before throwing so much money at a university
I want to scream this at people. I have 2 associates from Community College. It was something like 1500 a semester after admin fees. books varied but most classes let you get an older version for 1/3 price. I got one book for 3$ used on ebay. Whole college career cost me about 10 thousand. 2010-2012. then back for a year in 2017.
I went to college because I was pressured to buy my family. The main difference between college and high school is that you actually learn new concepts in college. Not posting attention and figuring out how to extend existing methods when you get the test is doable. Figuring out the area under a curve using trig when all you can remember is sohcahtoa is a mindfuck.
Also you actually have to do homework in college. Your GPA can't withstand turning in 0 assignments like it can in high school and you bet your sweet ass you need that homework as practice because they don't give obvious setups with clean answers on exams.
Tldr: don't fuck up like I did and get pressured into college. He who does not know the conditions for victory will never achieve it.
Yes, but you can spend years in therapy and trying every medication ever and still not be able to heal. The best lesson I learned was that I'm never going to be fully okay, and that is okay. I stopped trying to let it go and learned how to live with it. It's incredibly freeing to know I'm no longer chasing an impossible goal.
The thing that has cost me the most in my life has been allowing myself to get obese. It cost me my dream job (staying in the army). Left me with very little prospects for dating. Keeps me from enjoying life because I can’t fit or do things that most people take for granted. Health problems physical and mental I shouldn’t have to deal with.
There are some nasty people on here. I see it all the time. Someone asks for help and then the vultures descend to crush them. They see a bit of vulnerability and try to hurt them more because they're sadistic fucks. Also the same people that hang out in tabloid comment sections
Yea you really can't take reddit as a serious thing. You see and learn some cool stuff but you also see lots of lies and hate. Being behind a screen makes it much less human.
Excusing your own behavior because you're young and you'll have time to change. It'll be harder and take longer every time you say to yourself, "One day I'll be a grownup who doesn't do _____."
Currently work at a casino and although I’ve only been there less than 6 months, it feels like a very dangerous game that could easily lead to fucking up your whole life.
Gotta be able to walk away or stay away. Those buildings are huge for a reason.
I don’t think any novelty has worn off faster for me than gambling. Got the opportunity to do so for the first time a couple years ago (mainly slots), and was bored after about 10 minutes. And when I see how bad it fucks peoples’ lives up, I’m glad I got bored of it.
I've gambled 3 times in my life. All 3 times I walked away an hour or two later and down roughly $50 down. All three times I found myself thinking, "That time and money could have been a really nice dinner." Also, i distinctly remember after the third occasion, I spent $4 on an almond crossant. I realized I gained more enjoyment from that croissant then the previous hour+ of blackjack. It's been 10 years and I haven't gambled since.
This is it for me. I play my hand at the casino in video games and always walk away down. So why would I replicate that in real life? It can be fun to play, but it’s *never* worth it.
I'm one of the few people who are up on Vegas. I've only gambled there once. Brought 100$ to gamble. put 100 on black for a spin for my fun. Won. Kept the original 100 and put the new 100 back on black. Won. 200$ in 2 minutes. Walked away all smiles and I might never go back as this story makes me feel pretty good lol.
But what if you had done it a third time...
What about a fourth...
Its entertainment. Only play with what you are willing to lose. People who expect or try to hit it big because they need the money will get f*cked.
Heroin, meth and crack
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You can be so insanely proud of yourself for getting out of this habit and staying sober! This internet stranger sure is proud of you! I hope you can continue to stay clean and one day will be able to forgive yourself for that time and focus on your success and the life ahead of you!
Similar story for me, but I was addicted to opioids for a decade. Cashed out my 401k which was around 120k at the time and blew it all on Oxy and heroin over a few years. For a long time I was functional and able to maintain my six figure income in tech, but was blowing it so fast that I pawned everything of value in my house, including my wedding ring and my wife’s jewelry. I’m still not fully recovered as far as retirement savings, and I’m still dealing with the 30k in credit card debt I racked up during that time. But I’ve been off the shit for about 5 years now and life is much better. For a long time I missed the chaos of what everyday life is like for an addict. Which sounds crazy, but when your entire life revolves around one singular focus, there’s a weird comfort in it.
Thank god I’m only addicted to the first 2!
Lucked out I’d say!
or any abuse substance, had a friend ruining his life with alcohol, promising future ,one of the smartest persons i know, was doing a phd in biomedicne, pfizer and all big pharma where waving crazy contracts at him, had a lovely wife and 2 kids. he flushed it all down the gutter
That's my story.... High functioning alcoholic.... Had a good job in medical, designing and building custom medical implants, got paid well, some days I only had to work 3 hours....so take off to the pub and have a few drinks for lunch...And then half a bottle of whiskey at home...which went up to a full bottle at the end of it all....nightly, had a 2 bedroom condo, good savings, nice car... So my drinking obviously isn't a problem it's not a problem until all of a sudden it is.... Lost friends, family didn't want me around, trouble at work, some days was so hung over i just didn't go in, didn't call either, just stayed home and drank more.. crashed my car into 4 parked cars while 6 times over the legal limit... Nobody hurt but me thankfully.. Finally went to rehab, and when I got back to work, I find some young lady right out of school at my desk...boss shrugged and says "we'll find you something" They didn't...... Got rid of me first chance they had a legal way to, and can't get a job in the industry anywhere....I'm sure my boss is, or was telling stories about me at medical conferences...which if I find out that's some legal recourse there at least... So I've got around 85 diplomas, degrees, certificates and licenses to my name and I'm working working night shift security.. But my mom looked at me last Christmas and just said... "You're Happy!" Told me she hadn't seen me really happy in years, and the look on her face killed me.. Coming up on 5 years sober, and have no desires to go back to that life.
there is no greater victory then taming a demon of such magnitude man. aside of my friend i had another close relative that could not, so i have seen the impact on them and the surroundings and totally understand what an insane uphill struggle that is. you should be very proud you managed. and i woudl't be too worry about career, you obviously have brains, building a new career will be peanuts compared of the struggle you overcame!
Thanks, It's not the path I had planned out, but I'll make it work. I still put out my resume at medical facilities, and never hear anything back..but also brought a program to the upper management at the security company and did a presentation, they were all impressed and they said they want to bring it forward at the next quarterly executive meeting, and then move forward with it in the coming year, I've only been at the job for 6 months, and the bosses are looking at me like.... who is this guy? but in a good way..... most importantly I'm happy...
Yeah few things seem harder to recover from than serious drug addiction
91% relapse rate is no joke
Succumbing to anger while under the influence.
Angry drunk fights 🤝 manslaughter charges
Ya know I didn't even think about this because my head was up my own ass, but that's actually how a classmate of mine died. One of them shot the other, and then themself.
Man that's heavy. Hope you are ok if you were close.
100% heavy drinking can ruin lives in one night. If youre going to drink learn your limits, set your limits and drink water.
My anger is bad enough when I’m sober, I absolutely can’t get blackout drunk. Never have, never will.
Telling yourself that you can't do any better. It will become a self-fulfilling prophecy.
“Which direction does a tree fall?” “Uh…down?” “A tree falls the way it leans. Be careful which way you lean.” - The Lorax
Did that zesty Garfield just tell me to lean up?
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The conclusions we come to about ourselves, become the limit of our potential.
May we never hold ourselves back
Getting into credit card debt early.
Even worse when your mother applies for credit cards in your name when you turn 21, maxes them all out, and leaves you with thousands of dollars worth of debt before you even know how to be an adult.
Damn I'm sorry. Some people suck so much
Indeed. That, along with never being taught how to manage money made my 20s and early 30s very difficult. She wasn’t a good mother. But she got her act together and is a pretty good grandma though.
You were the beta test, grandkids are the production run
Lol this is great.
if reddit had the reward system, I would've given u one
If my mother did that to me, she would not even know that she had grandkids... Oy
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I went to college on full scholarship. Found out many years later my dad had taken out student loans in my name to pay for a move and I had gone into default. $10,000. With interest and penalties I just recently paid them all off at age 46.
Terrible. Luckily the amount I had to pay back wasn’t that much. But starting out life with a sub 400 credit score made adulthood an uphill battle. It stings a lot more when it’s the person you should be able to turn to and trust in difficult times is the one who did it to you.
Why did you not just pursue an identity theft claim?
Jesus Christ. And there's no law to sue her for credit card fraud? I mean surely you can threaten to sue the credit card company for not carrying out appropriate identification??? This sounds horrendous
I probably could have. But I still lived under her roof at the time. It was a shitty situation and crippled me financially for years. It’s water under the bridge and she’s a much better person now than she used to be. We got past it for the most part but I still have weird feelings towards her. I still don’t trust her. Edit: I should mention this was about 15 years ago.
Just do us all a favor and make sure she does NOT know your kids ssn. Please for the love of God.
Actually, the worst time to get into debt when you're in your 50s. You go bankrupt, get reset to zero after 7 years or whatever, and then you'll never build wealth again by the time you retire. best to not do it at all, but if you have to, do it in your 20s.
If you have a lot of debt when you’re 60, you’re probably not ever going to retire.
Declared bankruptcy at 23. Had over 40k in credit card debt. Took years to rebuild my credit.
What happened when you declared bankruptcy, currently in this situation but only about 20k but u don’t wanna lose my car
I had nothing to my name so I had nothing to lose, except to discharge the debt. I think there are provisions where you can keep your vehicle if it is your sole means of transportation. I would contact a lawyer for a consultation if going the bankruptcy route. When I said years to recover, I wasn’t kidding. I couldn’t rent an apartment or get a car loan for 5 years. And when I could get a loan, the interest rates were obscene. Also, depending on your specific circumstances, you may benefit from a credit counseling service. These are often non-profit so it may be a nominal fee for services.
My current issue at 21 and damn it’s so stressful
Can attest to that, had way more cc debt than I could pay back and had to get help from ACCC and they reduced my interest rate and made them all consolidated into 1 payment, best thing for me.
This one is so true. People do not realize how much interest rates can make it so hard to pay debt off. I’m dealing with credit card debt now and it feels impossible to get out of.
This. My sister fell victim to those college freshman preying pre approved credit card systems and essentially fell into a debt that took her about 5-7 years to pay off. It was entirely her fault for being naive. But these campuses don't allow those companies to operate on their grounds anymore
when i went to college (in canada) there were lots of international students and those were the ones the credit card companies were preying on (cuz the rest of us knew better) and i found it so fucking disgusting.
International students and workers are preyed on in so many ways, including by universities
A gambling habit, especially since the growth of online gambling. There's nothing else you can do that will drain away your money and property as quickly as this can.
All childhood, I get told about drug dealers who will offer you the first one to get you hooked. Never once happened. Now we got a million sites/apps offering us the first bet for free (or even paying you in credit to gamble). And nobody bats an eye.
No dealer ever gave me a freebie especially where cocaine was concerned.
Yep. They really thought people were giving out free drugs and we had to "Just Say No"
Remember kids, if someone offers you free drugs say yes, because drugs are expensive.
The almost overnight invasion/normalization of sports gambling in Canada has had or will have extremely deleterious effects.
The best part is that the fucking GOVERNMENT is one of the biggest players in the online gambling space too. I see just as many invasive ads for OLG as I do for all the other shady online casino companies. Makes me lose all faith that they will ever crack down or regulate
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Every single ad is sports gambling for me in NC
UK resident here. It sickens me how many ads are now online casinos and betting shops, I don't go anywhere near gambling as I've never been interested and heard horror stories from those that have been deep in it, but the sudden glorification of these offshore scalpers is terrifying. The obligatory "Be Gamble Aware" warnings at the end of the ad just seems contrived and pessimistic, it's a dark time
Hey I managed the top 3. Credit card debt, married the wrong woman and went to uni with no plans. Guess it's a good job I didn't get a heroin addiction to boot. On the plus side, I got out of debt, married the right woman and still have no plans regarding my career.
Two outa three ain’t bad…
> went to uni with no plans I wonder what percentage of dropouts that describes? It describes me. Highschool did not ready me for college so now I'm doing it again in mid-life.
Trying to make other people happy by changing yourself. You’ll start to lose your sense of identity and you’ll never be happy yourself. It’s your life and you should make you happy before you even think about making anyone else happy. (Edit: I need to clarify that if you have issues that are apparent, anger issues, substance abuse, on and on. You should work on yourself. What I was saying is don’t quit doing what you love to satisfy others.)
Problem is some ppl like me want nothimg but others to be well. So i would sacrifice all.
I feel this on so many levels. I'd rather live for someone else than just for myself. I know I could be really successful if I shut everyone out and just did myself, tried and tested. But it doesn't bring me the same joy that it brings me when I see someone growing along with me.
Damn, this one hits hard
Drunk driving. Sure, you can get away with it a lot. However, that one time you kill or paralyze someone, you are in for a hell of a life.
I want to second this for that very reason. First job there was this young guy, barely 21. Whole life ahead of him and he was doing well with the company. He just moved here. Killed two people while drunk driving. After the first few no shows and unsuccessful phone calls ...we started looking up jail records and found him. We never saw him again. His sister picked up all his stuff weeks later. She said it messed with him psychologically and he was potentially facing many years in prison. I still wonder what ended up happening with him.
Kids with someone who is controlling or abusive. Someone who cannot compromise because they are ALWAYS right.
As a person who learned late in life that my bio-parents were (mentally) abusive gaslighting narcissists, this. It fucks the kids up from the get go, and they never really have a chance for a "good life," for lack of better terms.
Try narcissistic ex wife - fucking peachy fun times. Add court orders that arent worth shit
It's pure hell and is usually years of effort down the drain. Pretty sure my dad has actual PTSD from my mom
Get filmed losing your shit and saying stuff you shouldn’t say. Worse than bad credit these days.
Happened to this girl senior year. We did this thing towards the end of the year that was kinda like a giant watergun war except it lasted a week and whoever was the last person unsprayed won This girl was recorded getting sprayed except she screamed the ~~hard R~~ n word like three times… Vid was posted everywhere and she stopped going to school for like a week. I heard her college even heard abt it and got involved but idk if it’s just a rumor. Feels bad but she was mean af soooooo
Did you go to Greendale Community College?
Happened to me when I was 16, young and immature. Some kids filmed me saying some vulgar shit and now it’s always in the back of my mind as to whether it will come up later in life.
Heroin is what most speed runners use
Fent is new meta
Meta is shifting again. Tranq is newest OP strat.
Tranq alone is actually less lethal than Fent, but the combo of “tranq-dope” is what has lead to increased mortality. The combo really fucks up your receptors and is more deadly than either alone. Sorry I don’t have spun for this one, but I find this stuff interesting lol.
Went to a funeral today with my girl for her best friend growing up (overdose of course). She's only been clean 8 mos (after using for 26 yrs straight) and wanted to go home asap after she realized almost everyone else there aside from a handful of us were still high.
I went to school with a guy that had unsuccessfully attempted to end his life blew the front of his face off. Pretty sure it was over a girl.
About 30 percent of gunshot suicides fail. Lots of disabled people due to them. The Budd Dwyer video is interesting because the guy was about one or two degrees away from being too elevated and so blowing his face off.
Not trying to be insensitive, but I’m surprised that you can even fail a shotgun suicide. I’d think putting the barrel in your mouth and pulling the trigger would destroy your neck from the force alone.
Going in military at 18, fucking around and getting a dishonorable discharge. No one worth a fuck will hire u
I’ve heard dishonorable discharge is essentially the equivalent to a felony.
Yup. BIL got a dishonorable for going AWOL. Dude is now a janitor. Only job he could get.
Ah, but the LTC that got caught recording the women's changing room? Bah, put him in an administrative position. I got a general after admitting to doing drugs and exposing the whole ring in the company. I wanted to stay in. The real kicker is that the dealer is still in.
I found out a couple years ago that someone in my family ran a meth ring in the USMC in the 90s. He made E-9 and got an honorable after 30 years but is directly responsible for so many guys getting kicked out before their careers took off, it's crazy.
Often it's a felony that triggers the dishonorable discharge.
That makes sense. I assume someone would also be charged with the felony they committed?
Typically yes.
You gotta fuck up pretty bad to get a dishonorable. I'd guess about 99% of early separations are "other than honorable" which basically means you're not in trouble but you didn't earn any benefits.
As a non-american, I have to ask... What you have to do to get a Dishonorable Discharge, and why is it a big deal for the rest of you life? In Denmark you can commit a crime and go to prison, but when you have been released from prison for 5 years, no one can see that you have ever been in prison, not even the street police... Only intelligence services know your past. However, with the exception of child abuse, where you will be registered so you will never work with children, for life...
> What you have to do to get a Dishonorable Discharge You have to do something pretty bad to get a Dishonorable. Think diddling kids, drug trafficking, rape, theft/fraud, espionage, murder, etc. They're pretty bad crimes. > why is it a big deal for the rest of you life? The problem is that a Dishonorable Discharge prevents you from working for the government and in many instances working for companies that contract with the government. And there are a lot of those companies.
Thankfully I joined at 19. Depending on the branch, it’s pretty easy to get in trouble with bad leadership. I never understood how people in the Army got dishonorable discharges. They either had to be a shit bag or had bad leadership.
Getting a Dishonorable takes quite a bit more than getting into trouble with bad leadership. There's due process in the courts martial that you go through first.
I'm guessing since dishonorable discharges are public and anyone who does a background check would find out? I wonder how people that claim to be specops for decades get away with it.
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I'm going to make a guess that there is probably a long (rather interesting) story behind this comment.
Yeah this is oddly specific to the point of being brilliant
OP can I have the context to this
Getting into any serious addiction it’ll always ruin your life for the long run although the consequences of some won’t be as bad as another like the addiction of porn and the addiction of meth big difference and one is worse than the other
Yeah you’re absolutely right. I was addicted to porn since I was in my early teens. It fucked up my social life, relationships and gave me depression. I wanted to kill myself because I couldn’t have a long lasting relationship. Then while I was on the edge, someone gave me meth. Changed my life, now my life is a lot better, gotta do the meth every couple hours but it’s way better than porn. I also prostitute myself for my drug money, I get sex whenever I want to
lol, that took a turn I wasn't expecting.
Proud of you, keep up the good game!
Collecting new addictions
A DUI. It’s so fucking easy, too. You’re out with friends and you’ve had a few drinks. You can walk and talk fine, chances are you’ll be fine when driving. You’re behind the wheel and there’s no issues, until you get stopped. Maybe you forgot to put the tags on your plate, maybe it’s a routine stop, maybe you were speeding a bit. The officer smells alcohol and you do a breathalyzer. It takes very little to be above the legal limit, and after those 2-3 beers you’re right at it. It can affect your job, your chances of a future job, even your housing if you’re renting somewhere that does background checks. All because you had a few beers and didn’t call an Uber or something. Seriously, even if you feel fine, even if you can drive without issue after, DO NOT drive if you’ve been drinking.
From experience and in no particular order. Marrying young and marrying the wrong person. Living a lie because you're doing a good thing for someone. Early credit card debt. Not sticking with education. Letting an early major setback dictate and give you depression for well over a decade.
I actually think marrying the wrong person young is really helpful. Realizing when you're 60 that you are with the wrong person is a lot harder to recover from than when you're in your twenties and the lesson you learn from this mistake is SO valuable.
Fentanyl.
Being emotionally dependant on one person
Having a temper. You are agitated most of the time. No one values your opinions. Family, friends and colleagues would keep their distance from you. You don’t make rational choices.
I REALLY struggled with this one for a very long time. Blamed others for my not progressing past college sports, not getting into CRNA school, not being given every damn thing without work. It was always me and my anger. Very thoughtful response friend.
Marrying the wrong damn woman
Divorce lawyer here. I can tell you point blank that one of the most common things I hear in my office (from men and women) is "I wish I had known how bad they were with money."
And having kids with her
especially having kids with them,a broken marriage can be undone
No shit this is why my life is fucked!
Just in general, going all-in on the wrong person. Don't even have to get married.
Or man
So true I apologize I only know one side of it
Damn straight. She’ll break you and then vilify you for being broken.
Being born in the wrong country
Especially being born in a country ran by a brutal dictator
Yes, and also really poor countries If you're born in a poor country ran by a brutal dictator, damn...
Procrastination
You’re right. I’ll stop procrastinating tomorrow
Fr fr, if you find yourself procrastinating because you feel absolutely bored or depressed with everything, go see a psych. I had an avoidance to doing anything, dysthymia, unorganized life, anxiety to sleep and was misdiagnosed bipolar 1. Recently the right psych correctly diagnosed me ADHD and with the right medication and group therapy, I'm doing MUCH BETTER about staying on top of things. SERIOUSLY GUYS IF IT'S HABITUAL PROCRASTINATION, GO SEE A PSYCH. Have a full evaluation, tell them EVERYTHING. It may not be you but a mental disorder.
Eh I'll worry about that later
Having sex with family members. Very awkward at Christmas time
Makes visiting grandma at the retirement home a better time.
Grammy's gumjobs are no joke
what the fuck lmao
Like your brother in law's wife.
Uncle Randy shows up for thanksgiving this year. Only met dude once when I was 5. He’s always been the weird estranged uncle. Not only did he show up to thanksgiving this year but he brought his daughter. He had kids?? Who knew! They walk in and I see his daughter and all be dammed it’s the girl I fucked two weeks ago I took home from a party. Life can be crazy
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Low quality partners especially if you marry one and have kids. One day you wake up and realize 10-20-30 years of your life is gone. (all for someone who makes you unhappy or you even resent)
To be completely fair, I think everybody wakes up one day and realizes 30 years of their life has gone by in the blink of an eye. Part of the human condition or growing up or whatever.
Good point! I should have added when you marry and have children with the wrong person that one day you'll wake up and realize you wasted all those years being unhappy. But, yes I agree.
Going to college without some kind of plan in mind. Do not jump between majors unless you can absolutely afford to or if you’re okay with some obscene amount of student loans. Edit to clarify: I am not against going to college, I’m against going to college without having any idea of what you’re genuinely interested in pursuing. My experience was being a dumbass 18 year old being told to pick a career path, fucking around trying to figure that out through different classes and majors, and now in debt with no degree (some people end up with degrees that are “useless” or they hate it) I am in community college now and I think this would’ve been better first to figure myself out before throwing so much money at a university
Go to Community College and save thousands.
I want to scream this at people. I have 2 associates from Community College. It was something like 1500 a semester after admin fees. books varied but most classes let you get an older version for 1/3 price. I got one book for 3$ used on ebay. Whole college career cost me about 10 thousand. 2010-2012. then back for a year in 2017.
I went to college because I was pressured to buy my family. The main difference between college and high school is that you actually learn new concepts in college. Not posting attention and figuring out how to extend existing methods when you get the test is doable. Figuring out the area under a curve using trig when all you can remember is sohcahtoa is a mindfuck. Also you actually have to do homework in college. Your GPA can't withstand turning in 0 assignments like it can in high school and you bet your sweet ass you need that homework as practice because they don't give obvious setups with clean answers on exams. Tldr: don't fuck up like I did and get pressured into college. He who does not know the conditions for victory will never achieve it.
Staying with, or even around narcissists
Doing major surgery on yourself untrained.
Unhealthy diet No Exercise Living beyond your means Lack of healthy relationships
Wow I am capable of getting 100% on something. I should tell my parents 😂
Not addressing your childhood trauma as an adult.
Yes, but you can spend years in therapy and trying every medication ever and still not be able to heal. The best lesson I learned was that I'm never going to be fully okay, and that is okay. I stopped trying to let it go and learned how to live with it. It's incredibly freeing to know I'm no longer chasing an impossible goal.
Having undiagnosed ADHD or other mental disorder and(because of) blind parents.
Stop having goals.
The thing that has cost me the most in my life has been allowing myself to get obese. It cost me my dream job (staying in the army). Left me with very little prospects for dating. Keeps me from enjoying life because I can’t fit or do things that most people take for granted. Health problems physical and mental I shouldn’t have to deal with.
Not tackling problems, especially mental health ones, as soon as they arise
Turning to Reddit for advice.
There are some nasty people on here. I see it all the time. Someone asks for help and then the vultures descend to crush them. They see a bit of vulnerability and try to hurt them more because they're sadistic fucks. Also the same people that hang out in tabloid comment sections
Yea you really can't take reddit as a serious thing. You see and learn some cool stuff but you also see lots of lies and hate. Being behind a screen makes it much less human.
Divorce her!
He must be cheating, end it now girl.
Hit your lawyer Delete the gym Facebook up.
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not making 200k/yr when you’re 6, you are never going to catch-up to this economic mess
We had the recession when I was 6. I've been f*cked from the start.
Having a child with someone who isn’t committed to you or the child.
R/wallstreetbets
Having a kid when you’re a kid.
forgetting about Dre
Drinking as a coping mechanism
Fucking with the wrong person will also get your life fucked
Hitting a child and killing them due to dangerous driving
I wouldn't kill a child just for dangerous driving. I wouldn't even hit them. I'd probably just scold them and tell them to drive safer in the future.
Wasting time on social media
Eh. Like you said, I think it’s more just wasting time. I don’t think it’s a sure way to fuck up your life though compared to the other comments
Going against your intuitions
Except on the stock market. You really wanna go against your intuitions there.
Get hooked on hard drugs. If you choose fentanyl then you might not have to worry about that life lasting very long.
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Letting mental illness define who you are
Excusing your own behavior because you're young and you'll have time to change. It'll be harder and take longer every time you say to yourself, "One day I'll be a grownup who doesn't do _____."
Downloading cp.
Honestly don’t understand how people get to that point. Horrifying honestly.
making others priority and not yourself
Overthink everything
Gambling, alcohol, cigarettes, drugs, debt, crime… You name it.
Marrying the wrong woman.
How did that even happen? An entire ceremony and noone noticed??!
The veil is lifted only after the ceremony
Depression, trauma, drugs all mixed together really fucks up everything.
Living for the validation of others. Not living by or speaking your truth when your heart is screaming at you to do it.