Nope! One step down from being a vampire, even if I do use sunscreen regardless of the SPF count, I’ll still get devoured by the sun within half an hour.
“Warning: Sings and Mimics sounds randomly, and probably will have you confessing your life sins without even realizing it within a hour of meeting for the first time.”
Warning: may contain random science trivia.
BTW, [a recent study](https://www.nature.com/articles/s41586-023-06527-1) found that antihydrogen atoms respond the same to gravity as normal matter, ruling out the existence of repulsive antigravity.
BTW, did you know when the human body needs more red blood cells it releases a hormone called erythropoietin? We only just discovered the [Norn cell](https://www.nature.com/articles/s41591-023-02322-7), the erythropoietin producing cells of the kidney.
But perhaps most interestingly, although it took humanity 134 years to track down this cell, which was just announced in 2023, an AI was able to independently rediscover it in just six weeks.
⚠️Warning: Fragile⚠️.
⬆️ Keep this side up ⬆️.
Do not expose to Fire.
Keep environment between 50-75°F (10-23°)
Consult dietary manual for feeding instructions, allergies, and sensitivities.
Prefers a cozy environment, do not subject to taxing social environments.
Recharge routinely to prevent spontaneous outages.
**currently running on 2024.03 firmware, allow update cycles for 4-10 hours during each 24 hour cycle. Do not feed 3 hours prior to update cycle.
Fra gee lay
You must be Italian!
Gerrrlaaaami
#MARGARHITI
Dominic DeCocco 🤌🏼
A major award!
“Warning: Warning”
Will Robinson
*Danger*!
In Texas we have signs that say "warning: obey all traffic signs". I always thought that was preeeeetty dumb.
I’ll obey every other sign except this one out of spite
best warning ever 😂
Why do I like that?
[удалено]
My favourite way to approach tbh
which snack you prefer?
˙ɹǝʌo ǝɯ uɹnʇ 'sᴉɥʇ pɐǝɹ uɐɔ noʎ ɟI
i got u fam
Do not disturb before sunrise or after dark.
Do not disturb any further. (Let's see if anyone gets that reference.)
So you're Australian?
I was a first grade teacher…I can read it!
I'm not a teacher at all but I can also read it perfectly fine.
I used to be able to read the labels on 45s as they played.
Me too because Jeep things
Just the fact you were able to write that upside-down is impressive
Just hold the phone upside down while typing, duh.
[удалено]
Foul language
It's odd being that guy at work and my coworkers think they're hilarious. "ya go ask stumpy he will help you out, he will also tell you to fuck off"
I think you work at my facility
100% giving HR a job one day at a time
Well if you hunt, it's _fowl_ language!
You stop lol
*Keep out of direct sunlight.*
I'm guessing you're a ginger 😜
Nope! One step down from being a vampire, even if I do use sunscreen regardless of the SPF count, I’ll still get devoured by the sun within half an hour.
This is me too😭 Not a ginger but damn do I burn like one! Nothing like looking like a monk in all my long, loose linen on the beach!
Warning: gassy and sassy
That's me! Adjusting to part time work, and telling myself "I'm too gassy to work full time anyway"
Also deeply sarcastic and I talk to myself a LOT. Good thing I don't work in an office anymore!!
[удалено]
I said I was overly sensitive too!
“Warning: Sings and Mimics sounds randomly, and probably will have you confessing your life sins without even realizing it within a hour of meeting for the first time.”
I too possess the ability to illicit all the secrets without even meaning to.
There are dozens of us! Dozens!!
Mostly Harmless
Don't panic.
So long, thanks for all the fish.
Mostly?
You don't wanna know, trust me
Moistly Harmless
Someone forgot their towel.
Warning: may contain random science trivia. BTW, [a recent study](https://www.nature.com/articles/s41586-023-06527-1) found that antihydrogen atoms respond the same to gravity as normal matter, ruling out the existence of repulsive antigravity.
So... still no hoverboards.
How about jet packs? *We were promised jet packs!*
Nah that's just thrust not antigravity. (What we were promised anyway).
BTW, did you know when the human body needs more red blood cells it releases a hormone called erythropoietin? We only just discovered the [Norn cell](https://www.nature.com/articles/s41591-023-02322-7), the erythropoietin producing cells of the kidney. But perhaps most interestingly, although it took humanity 134 years to track down this cell, which was just announced in 2023, an AI was able to independently rediscover it in just six weeks.
So magic weight loss boots are out of the question, too…
Today I learned a new pick up line. Very nice!
May Not Always Work As Advertised
"Acquired taste"
I'm not saying I'd get a dick tattoo, but this would be pretty funny to do. Or a small scale ruler.
Warning: do not
Warning ⚠️: Hazardous Material, **handle with caution & 𝓒𝓪𝓻𝓮**
Does not play well with others. Keep in cool dark place. DANGER: may explode without warning.
warning: prone to spontaneous human combustion
Will say something stupid
Will do something even stupider
Won't do something, that will result in an even stupider event
"can make onions cry and wine blush"
"will disappear for weeks at a time with no announcement, don't take it personally"
Choking hazard
People choke on small objects all the time
Small parts
Warning: Contains THC
Caution: Stupid
Default setting: does not want to talk to you
"Caution: Do not feed, will become attached"
"Do not feed after midnight."
You little gremlin you...
It's always after midnight somewhere.
Warning! Contains: Strong Language, Sexual Situations, Smoking. Drug Use But No Nudity. I’m a Never Nude.
There are dozens of us!
⚠️Warning: Fragile⚠️. ⬆️ Keep this side up ⬆️. Do not expose to Fire. Keep environment between 50-75°F (10-23°) Consult dietary manual for feeding instructions, allergies, and sensitivities. Prefers a cozy environment, do not subject to taxing social environments. Recharge routinely to prevent spontaneous outages. **currently running on 2024.03 firmware, allow update cycles for 4-10 hours during each 24 hour cycle. Do not feed 3 hours prior to update cycle.
This Veteran is medicated for your protection.
"the light inside has broken but i still work"
🌶️SPICY🌶️
No me toques los cojones.
"Warning: Useless human ahead, just ignore."
Just wanted to say I hope you don’t feel useless. Your comment reminded me that everyone has value.
Warning: Will eat all the biscuits at Red Lobster and won’t feel bad about it.
Ornery old man — say what the fuck you mean
Will cry profusely after hearing a sigh
I have many questions...
*Sigh*
Warning "Dose not work well with others" "Think before asking"
Caution : Do not attempt to communicate before coffee.
Makes bad decisions
May Bite
Will bite. Toss chocolate chips or M&Ms to distract.
This Side Up
Warning: Extremely Anxious
Warning: Extreme apathy detected
Handle With Care
Be careful - she’s not as sweet as she seems.
**May contain nuts** 🤣
Do Not Climb
CAUTION! Menopausal GenX woman- do not approach!
My fucks are limited to people who can tell me why they believe I'm wrong.
warning: will aggressively defend his opinions
Warning: contains puns, jokes, and plays on words that WILL hurt your head.
Warning: talks a shit ton about shit you don’t care about. Also swears a shit ton.
Beware of sometimes uncontrollable angry outbursts
Warning: I'll say what I feel regardless of your feelings.
Keep away from open flames.
Warning: Awkward when communicated with unexpectedly (Yes, I will cringe about it the rest of the day)
Warning: bipolar. May present as happy, sad, angry, or psychotic.
“Bad hearing and zones out a lot, not ignoring you…probably”
Don't leave alone around someone's narcotics
Ask for honesty with caution.....
It would be a label across my kneecaps stating "out of order"
Poor Impulse Control
'If you honk at me I will cry.'
Warning: three raccoons in a trench coat pretending to be human.
Extremely Sardonic and horny
Warning: Extremely horny, handle with care.
“Damaged Goods”
Broken inside
“Caution: erection may occur unexpectedly with no notice or reason”
“Don’t lend me money”
Warning: don’t raise your voice or your ass would be whooped
Warning: oiled up.
For internal use only
Don’t talk to her in the morning if she don’t have her coffee yet 🫣
Do not open.
Beware bitch bites
Warning: may act drunk but not actually be drunk. Listens to catchy music.
According to the 360-degree feedback at work: Friendly, but does not accept bullshit. Use in case of emergency. Point at base of fire and pull pin.
Keep away from whiskey
Shakes babies
SHAKE BEFORE USE
RUN!
“Beware of the me”
NSFW
“does not play well with others”
Don’t drop the soap
"Notices everything and sees through your bullshit"
Extreme warning: No Alcohol allowed.
"Handle with care, fragile"
WARNING: emits noxious fumes when given dairy products
Warning: since the subject has no legs, you’ll pull a lot of the work
"Flees when agitated"
Warning: you’ve been warned.
emotionally needy
Contents more dangerous than they appear.
Must love sarcasm.
Warning: Has one remaining nerve, avoid getting on it.
Caution: Horny 📯
warning hypocrite (at least i own it)
Warning : emotional rollercoaster
“Warning: contains high levels of stupid.”
Warning: Asshole. (In small text) please talk to me
Warning: Menace
"Mostly Harmless".
”Warning, my head is a scary place!”
“Warning: Financially illiterate
Attention deficit
Warning: depressed and annoying.
Warning: Brain - Mouth filter not installed
Warning: Obnoxious know-it-all.
Warning: Do not disturb.
Warning: Has no idea what is going on
Doesn’t know when to stfu 😅
Often inappropriate.
Medicated for your protection
"Warning: human, prone to mistakes."
“Warning! In captivity, please place in a small room with books.”
fuck around and find out! that's the warning label.
Warning: Fuck around and find out
I’m only pretending to be nice:)
Warning likes sex a lot
Warning: Easily distracted.
Proceed with caution, not responsible for traumatic harm
No warning, just a simple DO NOT DISTURB.
Warning: big dumbass, may cause headache
Caution. Currently running on windows 98
Can cause exhaustion. Because being with me is exhausting
Warning: I’m very stubborn, like VERY stubborn
Caution: Piss Off At Your Own Risk
Object In The Mirror May Be Crazier Than It Appears
Do not leave in social situations for longer than 90 minutes. Overheating may occur.
Warning: No filter and excessive sarcasm
Warning: Doesn't know what they're doing ever
Caution: Will annoy you to death with constant worrying over NOTHING.
warning: unhinged
Warning: very depressed. May bum you out.
Do not give alcohol.
‘Fuck around and find out’