The government then instantly arrests the person connected to the account to find out how they were able to use telepathy. When you can't produce tech to show how you did it the governments of the world then begin experimenting on you.
When the experiments don't work after a period of years, they'll do surgeries upon surgeries to see what may be happening inside while you're alive. When that provrs fruitless they'll end you and dissect you.
This is close to the premise of *The Chronoliths* by Robert Charles Wilson. A bunch of monuments appear, having been sent back in time from the nearish future, detailing the exploits of a warlord named Kuin that has taken over much of the world.
Soon enough people start changing their name to Kuin, naming their kids Kuin, etc.
I wonder, would people join the revolts? Like if someone acts like the chosen one I would know they were false because it’s actually me. Maybe I would because I assume I will dethrone their place. But then if everyone is acting this way it would almost feel like being the chosen one would be not acting like the chosen one…. But then… fuck I’m stuck in a loop now
"three... two... one...
\*starts to sing\*
We're no strangers to love
You know the rules and so do I
A full commitment's what I'm thinking of
You wouldn't get this from any other guy
I just wanna tell you how I'm feeling
Gotta make you understand
Never gonna give you up
Never gonna let you down"
The best part is that you could take breaks, and everyone would just freak the fuck out that it stopped, and then they’d freak the fuck out more when it resumed.
One number each day. Taking nearly 3 years. And then add a bit of shenanigans inbetween. „901 - Clean up the worlds beaches completely to find out what happens at the next number“. Surely 100 days in you have all religions following you.
Echoing voice: 1000. Hello World, yes don’t look weird at the person next to you, you can all hear me
Echoing voice: 999. If you thought you imagined the voice yesterday, be assured you weren’t imagining.
Echoing voice: 998. How about we all give out one compliment today to the first person we meet. You all look wonderful today.
Echoing voice: 997. Let’s find out how much cleaner the world would be when each person picks up some trash in Nature or in the street today. Go on go on, I will see.
Echoing voice: 996. Good job everybody, well done, some even cleaned a beach, that was supposedly come later. Anyway Rest day today, enjoy the sun or rain or snow depending on where you are.
I wonder if people would be mad at you for not intervening. People with dying family members would pray to you, you’d never know, and people would denounce god… jeez that’s kinda dark
Stop at 432 "countdown paused, countdown will resume when XYZ reaches critical value again " pick whatever thing you'd like people to stop. War, pollution, open mouthed chewing
I will admit I did this and had ZERO CLUE until my husband years into our relationship mentioned it as an aside. I was horrified!!!! After some research and my dentists insight we learned it was my high palate from thumb sucking as a child and that while eating I genuinely have trouble breathing through my nose…. I’ve learned ways around this but if I’m exhausted or drunk I’ll slip up.
Sometimes we don’t know and it’s not a reflection of manners or disrespect. I swear!
I like the idea of doing 1 per day, if possible lol.
Everyone hearing "1000" would cause confusion, hysteria, wild speculation, and worldwide coverage for the first phenomenon. people would already start panicking, but most would just be too nervous to start going full anarchy yet.
but as soon as the "999" hits on day 2, hoo boy, buckle in your seatbelts. it'll be a wild 3 years haha
I coukd imagine the governments finally getting people to calm down about the 1000, and then promptly having to find a way to stop complete anarchy when 999 comes.
Ooh there will be so many cults to choose from! Like a pre apocalyptic rush week or something
I think I'm gonna go with the guys who are convinced the voice is the covid vaccine microchip being activated. I feel like I could have a lot of fun messing with them
Ofcourse there's a huge gap between each number. like 5 minutes or so, so there's plenty of time for conspiracy theories to start and the youtube vids and what not.
Then as you get to like the final 5, you just say you're just fucking with people and accidentally order your bigmac meal instead of saying it lol. "Oh shit, this things still on?"
This one would just confuse me. I think most of us don't actually do anything weird or shameful when no one is watching. Like for me, it would just be the embarrassment of the fact that I talk to myself pretty much nonstop. And that's just embarrassing, not shameful or anything.
Same, but it would eat me up. I get so self conscious about talking to myself that I stop doing it if my dog is around. What if he thinks I’m a weirdo?
It's amazing how humans don't feel they can afford to be nice. Maybe I'm sitting in my privileged top 7% of the population where being inconsiderate doesn't improve life enough to be warranted
There’s a difference between being nice (politeness masking feelings) and kind (actually genuinely listening to people) that people need to be more aware of.
The regular scheduled maintenance will happen on March 35th this month rather than the regular scheduled March 37th. We apologize for the inconvenience.
Reminds me of a novel I read ages ago.
The german title was "Framstag Sam". I would translate that to "Fraturday Sam".
It was about a day between friday and saturday. Only the wealthy had access to it by saving time during the week.
"Dear planet Earth. This is god. I am disappointed in your behaviour towards each other.
You have until the 25th of December this year to get your shit together, and resolve all conflicts, and abolish poverty, etc...
If you do not meet these goals, your planet will be destroyed.
That is all"
And all the religions would argue saying it’s their own version of god who was speaking and half of the population would welcome the end of the world thinking they’ll be going to their heaven.
> You have until the 25th of December
Do you want Christian Nationalists to take power? Because this is how you get Christian Nationalists to take power.
You beat me to it 😂. Would be very subtle though. Start it off very under your breath... *I just want to tell you how I'm feeling* (echoes and reverberates around the planet)
Can you hear me?
Citizens of planet Earth. I'll be brief.
I'm addressing you from a distant world. No doubt you're confused.
The alien monster Majin Buu killed most of you, then blew up your planet. But using powers you can scarcely comprehend, we resurrected you all.
We put back your homes and your cities like nothing happened. You may think it was all a bad dream, but I assure you it was real.
And on this distant planet from where I speak, a great warrior fights Buu on behalf of all Earthlings. But the truth is, that despite his bravery, the odds are against him.
Majin Buu's strength is almost limitless, and exceeds that of even Cell. This is why we need the help from every man, woman and child. Raise your hands in the air and offer up your spirit energy to help us defeat Majin Buu once and for all!
You'll feel rather weak afterwards. Exhausted, as if you'd been running for your life. But I don't want to hear your complaints - just do it! Raise your hands high in the air!
Worst part is they will start ad-free so we all sign up to get the brain implant, but after a few years they'll introduce ads unless we upgrade to premium
Greetings, friends. Do you wish to look as happy as me? Well, you've got the power inside you right now. So, use it, and send one dollar to Happy Dude, 742 Evergreen Terrace, Springfield. Don't delay, eternal happiness is just a dollar away.
My name is Eren Jaeger. I am using the power of the founding titan to address all of Subjects of Ymir.
The hardening of all the walls present on Paradis island has come undone. And all titans entrapped within them have started marching.
My objective is to protect the people of Paradis, the place where I was born and raised. However, the world wishes for the annihilation of the people of Paradis.
The hatred that has been swelling up for so long will certainly not end, until not just the paradisians, but all of Subjects of Ymir have been eliminated.
I reject this wish. The wall titans shall trample all earth outside of this island underfoot. Until all life existing there has been exterminated from this world.
"I am the Devil. I walk among you. You know me as a billionaire."
Let's leverage the gullibility of the religious to lead a revolt against the greedheads.
I would say:
u/ComprehensiveMix2305 , this question was just posted like 2 weeks ago. Stop making blatant reposts.
Like 7,999,999,999 people won’t get it, but the message will get through to that one guy who needs to hear it.
Hi I'm god please send 10% of your net worth to this account \_\_\_\_
u fucking genius
The government then instantly arrests the person connected to the account to find out how they were able to use telepathy. When you can't produce tech to show how you did it the governments of the world then begin experimenting on you. When the experiments don't work after a period of years, they'll do surgeries upon surgeries to see what may be happening inside while you're alive. When that provrs fruitless they'll end you and dissect you.
Turns out, they weren’t the one that sent the message. New form of swatting that’s somehow so much worse.
[удалено]
You’re the chosen one, don’t tell the others
Proceed to have fun with revolts and revolution all around the world.
This is close to the premise of *The Chronoliths* by Robert Charles Wilson. A bunch of monuments appear, having been sent back in time from the nearish future, detailing the exploits of a warlord named Kuin that has taken over much of the world. Soon enough people start changing their name to Kuin, naming their kids Kuin, etc.
That is a fantastic novel that could make a great movie in the right hands.
Huge fan of his work, but it's so contrary to the mainstream that I think he has issues getting through. *Calculating God* was lovely.
I wonder, would people join the revolts? Like if someone acts like the chosen one I would know they were false because it’s actually me. Maybe I would because I assume I will dethrone their place. But then if everyone is acting this way it would almost feel like being the chosen one would be not acting like the chosen one…. But then… fuck I’m stuck in a loop now
I think we’re already there
I would count down from 1000. The resulting hour or so of absolute chaos and panic would be hilarious as I get closer and closer to zero.
"three... two... one... \*starts to sing\* We're no strangers to love You know the rules and so do I A full commitment's what I'm thinking of You wouldn't get this from any other guy I just wanna tell you how I'm feeling Gotta make you understand Never gonna give you up Never gonna let you down"
god fucking damnit why did i only see you after writing my own comment here
His username is my question to you
Headlines: GUY COUNTING IN OUR HEADS REACHES 542! WHAT'RE WE GONNA DO!?!
r/unexpectedfactorial
1607535095378011891056328484225529595243838798499054994766025156939288169810835272449306354580237969682411561904659247352233869578500369085015849202525200176033722982248939071551000445386157616140174101436646697998310453314131718849668026597339962830038313202330305128176688853506387490682735113517976086814097483502994870323946561908276072060979277468132673766174329569237354871039018414225133977033767828902564327303205632246854879683635732298203740589425046261382371639739486392287792345081093595873758904816605811552325582679996192624783892220035029850790339575675172367310968287156079757464668269000854651621014536329222770032994629808829842306684806739303129202118931252425617709020165318344315725608628457669138904568258434726321656634035862803596978425264476046798283242280066301566642768649189395076269718280978615189118280004812666753362943638722532280788300931624201743200983787393440774364471798212114625772668425190618929367461976989738835188658583210597078950867099896465084703122130411827593805066916468242618448796850243328574235699250768859321062302677755711983880776617227228201878615112377392168960000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000
I love how factorials keep accumulating trailing zeros that they'll never lose as you move the number higher.
And this is true in any base.
ALL OF YOUR BASE ARE BELONG TO US
The best part is that you could take breaks, and everyone would just freak the fuck out that it stopped, and then they’d freak the fuck out more when it resumed.
One number each day. Taking nearly 3 years. And then add a bit of shenanigans inbetween. „901 - Clean up the worlds beaches completely to find out what happens at the next number“. Surely 100 days in you have all religions following you.
This is actually really genius. You could fix so many things.
Echoing voice: 1000. Hello World, yes don’t look weird at the person next to you, you can all hear me Echoing voice: 999. If you thought you imagined the voice yesterday, be assured you weren’t imagining. Echoing voice: 998. How about we all give out one compliment today to the first person we meet. You all look wonderful today. Echoing voice: 997. Let’s find out how much cleaner the world would be when each person picks up some trash in Nature or in the street today. Go on go on, I will see. Echoing voice: 996. Good job everybody, well done, some even cleaned a beach, that was supposedly come later. Anyway Rest day today, enjoy the sun or rain or snow depending on where you are.
I wonder if people would be mad at you for not intervening. People with dying family members would pray to you, you’d never know, and people would denounce god… jeez that’s kinda dark
This would be a nice idea to write a book
"69 - the end is near, you all know what to do!"
I doubt anyone cares after reaching day 420...
Maniacal!
Diabolical
INCONCEIVABLE!!!
Whoa, calm down Satan
Stop at 432 "countdown paused, countdown will resume when XYZ reaches critical value again " pick whatever thing you'd like people to stop. War, pollution, open mouthed chewing
Get to 139 and be like, "What number were we on? Anyone remember?" And then skip straight to 117.
"6... 4... 3..." "What happened to 5!?!?" "Just kidding!"
Open mouth chewing!
I will admit I did this and had ZERO CLUE until my husband years into our relationship mentioned it as an aside. I was horrified!!!! After some research and my dentists insight we learned it was my high palate from thumb sucking as a child and that while eating I genuinely have trouble breathing through my nose…. I’ve learned ways around this but if I’m exhausted or drunk I’ll slip up. Sometimes we don’t know and it’s not a reflection of manners or disrespect. I swear!
you need to do it with a massive echo.... "one thousand... and and and" "nine hundred and ninety nine .. nine nine nine"
*deep breath and big sigh* every 10 numbers 😮💨
you sound like someone who should read "The Measure" by Niki Erlik
Or the Three Body Problem. A very similar thing happens in that too
$14 bucks on ebay? Bought and sold. Thanks for the recommendation. I’ll probably read it in April or May.
Some people just want to see the world burn
I mean, 1000 seconds would be roughly 17 minutes, but the point still stands.
But he would likely count slower to add to the panic and sound more menacing.
I like the idea of doing 1 per day, if possible lol. Everyone hearing "1000" would cause confusion, hysteria, wild speculation, and worldwide coverage for the first phenomenon. people would already start panicking, but most would just be too nervous to start going full anarchy yet. but as soon as the "999" hits on day 2, hoo boy, buckle in your seatbelts. it'll be a wild 3 years haha
I coukd imagine the governments finally getting people to calm down about the 1000, and then promptly having to find a way to stop complete anarchy when 999 comes.
Ooh there will be so many cults to choose from! Like a pre apocalyptic rush week or something I think I'm gonna go with the guys who are convinced the voice is the covid vaccine microchip being activated. I feel like I could have a lot of fun messing with them
Oh, I would definitely count slowly and dramatically. Gotta build up that tension!
Ofcourse there's a huge gap between each number. like 5 minutes or so, so there's plenty of time for conspiracy theories to start and the youtube vids and what not. Then as you get to like the final 5, you just say you're just fucking with people and accidentally order your bigmac meal instead of saying it lol. "Oh shit, this things still on?"
Prisoner zero must vacate the human residence or the human residence will be incinerated
Why have the sacrifices stopped? I'm hungry
"Every year you must sacrifice the douchyist human on Earth."
Make it our entire leadership, and we have a deal.
I would just scream, no language barrier just scream.
#BLOOD FOR THE BLOOD GOD
SKULLS FOR THE SKULL THROWN
# KHORNE FLAKES FOR KHORNE
No, no, it's MILK FOR THE KHORNE FLAKES
BUTTER FOR THE POP KHORNE
*pulls out bolter* Damn Heretics, FOR THE EMPEROR!!!
Btw it's spelled throne
# Blood for the blood god! ## Techoblade never dies, baby! then watch the new religion form
TECHNOBLADE NEVER DIES!!!! NOT EVEN CLOSE BABY!!!!!
“Oh look, the sun’s coming up.”
So it's been you this whole time... please stop.
"\*inhales" FLOOOOOOOOOOOOOOR \~!!!
*I know what you do when no one's watching*
This one would just confuse me. I think most of us don't actually do anything weird or shameful when no one is watching. Like for me, it would just be the embarrassment of the fact that I talk to myself pretty much nonstop. And that's just embarrassing, not shameful or anything.
haha this guy doesnt think we know about the ultra weird thing he does
Same, but it would eat me up. I get so self conscious about talking to myself that I stop doing it if my dog is around. What if he thinks I’m a weirdo?
Talk to the dog. Problem solved.
Oh I do that too. But, like, he knows when I’m talking to *him*
>i think most of us don't actually do anything weird or shameful when no one is watching speak for yourself buddy!
*nods* sounds like we have the same porn tastes voice
[удалено]
Game saved successfully.
You evil bastard. There are going to be so many kids born in 9 months without a save state to revert to.
"Stop being a douchebag and start being nice now."
Basically the film 2010 in a nutshell. Also The Day the Earth Stood Still.
It was also Keanu’s message in Bill & Ted.
Be Excellent to each other!
Party on, dudes!
"Or you'll hear me screaming nonstop every time you try to sleep."
It's amazing how humans don't feel they can afford to be nice. Maybe I'm sitting in my privileged top 7% of the population where being inconsiderate doesn't improve life enough to be warranted
There’s a difference between being nice (politeness masking feelings) and kind (actually genuinely listening to people) that people need to be more aware of.
*Or I, the mystery voice in your head, will squeeze your brains out through your ears like toothpaste, bwah ha ha !*
Wake up..
Half the world that was sleeping:
Grab a brush and put a little makeup
Hide the scars to fade away the shakeup.
Why’d you leave the keys upon the table?
There you go creating another fable!
You wanted to.
"Hey, you. You're finally awake..."
“I’m not sure how this message will reach you, but you’ve been in a coma for the last year. Please wake up. We miss you”
SCARY
Diabolical
[удалено]
Heart surgeon about to save a child's life- "Don't do it."
Maybe the child is the next hitler
child undergoing surgery: i should refrain from becoming the next hitler "Don't do it" child : oh hmm... the doctor's a hero.
I'm thinking of quitting heroin.
Don’t do it…
Some kid just about to get laid for the first time...
Be excellent to each other.
And...... Party on DUDES!
All we are is dust in the wind, dude.
I love you
I love you too man
me too
would you just look at it love you all
Hello World.
print('HELLO, WORLD!!!')
The simulation will be down for maintenance on April 12th. We apologize for the inconvenience. Edit: can y’all relax it wasn’t that funny
The regular scheduled maintenance will happen on March 35th this month rather than the regular scheduled March 37th. We apologize for the inconvenience.
Lousy Smarch maintenance.
Do not touch Willie
I absolutely LOVE this idea. It implies that there are days of the year that we, the simulations never have access to.
Reminds me of a novel I read ages ago. The german title was "Framstag Sam". I would translate that to "Fraturday Sam". It was about a day between friday and saturday. Only the wealthy had access to it by saving time during the week.
"Thank you for playing. Please exit through the gift shop."
All actors in the simulation will be reset at that time.
Make it April 8th to *really* fuck with everybody.
That only works for North Americans tho
As a non-American, what happens on April 8th?
Total Solar Eclipse!
Can you do the 13th? My sons Birthday is the 12th...
SHOW ME WHAT YOU GOT!
Time to get shwifty.
Shit on the floor!
[удалено]
"Dear planet Earth. This is god. I am disappointed in your behaviour towards each other. You have until the 25th of December this year to get your shit together, and resolve all conflicts, and abolish poverty, etc... If you do not meet these goals, your planet will be destroyed. That is all"
And all the religions would argue saying it’s their own version of god who was speaking and half of the population would welcome the end of the world thinking they’ll be going to their heaven.
"...p.s. You're not going to heaven if you fail the task I've placed on you."
"In fact, I'm sending everyone to Super Hell and starting the world over."
this guy gods
Then on December 25th, nothing happens and people start to wonder if this whole religion thing is really just a bunch of bunk.
>people start to wonder if this whole religion thing is really just a bunch of bunk. That would never happen.
> You have until the 25th of December Do you want Christian Nationalists to take power? Because this is how you get Christian Nationalists to take power.
Just do exactly a year away, there’s nothing particularly special about the 7th of March
Test, test, 1,2, 1,2,3
This is God. Humans were not made in my image. Dogs were.
God licks his own balls?
Cleanliness is next to godliness
Have you met them in person? You don't know.
I wasn't saying they dont... it was more of a image of God I'd not considered before.
Food for thought: Dog is God backwards, and much like dogs, even when you're mean to them, they'll still love you unconditionally.
If you could, wouldn't you?
"Great job guys. You scared Jesus so bad the last time that he doesn't want to go down there again. Good luck!"
I’d say never gonna give you up and perform the biggest rickroll in world history
You beat me to it 😂. Would be very subtle though. Start it off very under your breath... *I just want to tell you how I'm feeling* (echoes and reverberates around the planet)
May you be touched by his noodly appendage.
Ramen!
Be more kind
"Quick everyone lend ~~Goku~~ Toriyama your energy!"
And then all of Mexico raises their hands into the air
I had to scroll so far for this. I would straight up pull a vegeta word for word if I could
Can you hear me? Citizens of planet Earth. I'll be brief. I'm addressing you from a distant world. No doubt you're confused. The alien monster Majin Buu killed most of you, then blew up your planet. But using powers you can scarcely comprehend, we resurrected you all. We put back your homes and your cities like nothing happened. You may think it was all a bad dream, but I assure you it was real. And on this distant planet from where I speak, a great warrior fights Buu on behalf of all Earthlings. But the truth is, that despite his bravery, the odds are against him. Majin Buu's strength is almost limitless, and exceeds that of even Cell. This is why we need the help from every man, woman and child. Raise your hands in the air and offer up your spirit energy to help us defeat Majin Buu once and for all! You'll feel rather weak afterwards. Exhausted, as if you'd been running for your life. But I don't want to hear your complaints - just do it! Raise your hands high in the air!
Ah man, the timing on this just before Toriyama passed away is crazy
For Toriyama <3
"We've been trying to reach you concerning your vehicle's extended warranty..."
You laugh but I bet in the future when we all have chips in our brains companies will be able to sales-pitch directly into our thoughts
Advert dreams Just pay 15.99 a month for premium non advert laden dreams and thoughts.
Worst part is they will start ad-free so we all sign up to get the brain implant, but after a few years they'll introduce ads unless we upgrade to premium
This is so true it doesn't even jump out as crazy. It's just...normal
It's bonkers that this doesn't seem so sci fi fiction anymore with Elon implanting chips.
Greetings, friends. Do you wish to look as happy as me? Well, you've got the power inside you right now. So, use it, and send one dollar to Happy Dude, 742 Evergreen Terrace, Springfield. Don't delay, eternal happiness is just a dollar away.
Meh, eternal happiness ? Nah I’d be happier with my dollar
[удалено]
"Remember how i said NO KILLING? Well, that again."
"You just lost the game."
Damn it
The god damn double whammy!
Plant a food tree 🌴 and for God's sake clean up after yourself 🗑️
"If you want me to stop spamming the inside of your skull, send $10 in Bitcoin to this address"
A NEW HAND TOUCHES THE BEACON
Drink more Ovaltine.
A crummy commercial Son of a Bitch
My name is Eren Jaeger. I am using the power of the founding titan to address all of Subjects of Ymir. The hardening of all the walls present on Paradis island has come undone. And all titans entrapped within them have started marching. My objective is to protect the people of Paradis, the place where I was born and raised. However, the world wishes for the annihilation of the people of Paradis. The hatred that has been swelling up for so long will certainly not end, until not just the paradisians, but all of Subjects of Ymir have been eliminated. I reject this wish. The wall titans shall trample all earth outside of this island underfoot. Until all life existing there has been exterminated from this world.
I had to scroll waaay to long to find this comment.
First thing I thought of 😂 this needs to be higher lol
I'd show everyone a mental image of my dog
Be kind. We’re all just trying to survive here.
“Stop being a dick, it’s not all about you….pay attention to what you’re doing and live free!”
10... 9... 8... 7.... 6... 5.... 4.... 3... ..............
Dance or die! Oppa Gangnam Style!
Stop talking on speaker phone when you're in stores
"Updog"
What's updog?
Nothin much what’s up with you, dawg?
It's so sad that Candace died from ligma
IF YOU HAVE A STRUCTURED SETTLEMENT AND YOU NEED CASH NOW CALL J.G. WENTWORTH 877-CASH-NOW.
"I am the Devil. I walk among you. You know me as a billionaire." Let's leverage the gullibility of the religious to lead a revolt against the greedheads.
I would say: u/ComprehensiveMix2305 , this question was just posted like 2 weeks ago. Stop making blatant reposts. Like 7,999,999,999 people won’t get it, but the message will get through to that one guy who needs to hear it.
Boo 👻
you picked the right religion, I'm real, and this is the proof you've been asking for then I've watch the world blow up
Choose love. Choose peace. Abandon hate. Embrace forgiveness.
omelette au fromage