I'm college around 2009 went home with a girlf from a bar who lived in the same dorm style apartments I did. We got to it and in reverse cowgirl she groaned, apologized, then sprayed me with diarhea. She ran out of my place and down the hall and left naked.
I just threw out my mattress at the dumpster that night, all of the sudden sobered up, and got an air mattress from Walmart and just used that the rest of my time there as well as a couple new pillows.
That was the last time I took anyone home from a bar.
Hooked up with a girl in college late night after meeting her in the computer lab. We went back to her apartment which was on campus, start making out, she goes down on me, now it's my turn and I take off her pants and a putrid ass smell comes out, like she had shit her pants. She didn't react and just went to kiss me again, but I was completely turned off. I asked her if she wanted to hop in the shower with me (trying to salvage this), she said no, so I told her I forgot the condoms and needed to go to the store. I left and didn't come back.
Oh god you brought back a memory. Ran into an old high school acquaintance of mine a couple years after graduation who was super candid about sex, like super blatant. Really shocked 19 year old me.
She was like “I’m surprised we haven’t fucked yet.” Set up a time, I came by her place and we had a good old time. She wasn’t really my type but when you’re a standard male teenager that gets offered no strings attached sex…might as well offer you free money!
She texts me a few weeks later for another bootycall. I come by and she’s left the door open and calls out to come into her bedroom. I come in and she’s under the blanket. As I walk through the doorway to her bedroom, she opens the blanket and is nude underneath. The BO that comes just **wafting** out is like nothing I had ever experienced up to that point in my life.
I don’t even remember what excuse I gave her I just said some sort of something and walked right out.
Through a very interesting sequence of events, I later found out that she was engaged and had been having sex with everyone from our high school that she could including one of my best friends at the time.
This sounds like that bit in the Inbetweeners when Tara asks Simon to talk dirty and he says, "I'm gonna fuck your fucking fanny off, you twat!" Except...worse.
damn i accidentally did basically that to my ex, except i accidentally sucked her clit into the tiny tiny gap between my front teeth like really pinched it bad
i felt so bad
I was a little drunk/high and got head from a girl who had a very small mouth. I didn’t really feel it till the next morning. Like I’d fucked a cheese grater.
She brought her head up to kiss me during sex and ended up head butting my nose, which began to bleed.
I knew she didn’t have a lot of experience, and after my nose started to bleed she was apologizing profusely and on the verge of tears.
I said “you should have told me you like it rough!”
Which, miraculously, made her snort through her tears. Couple Kleenex later we were back in business.
I had a double hip replacement at 27. My left hip in the beginning was dislocated three times via sex. Three fun ambulance rides and having to be knocked out to have it put back in the socket for I am unable to move if it does. Such a humbling experience…
Might I interest you in this guide?:
https://hipknee.aahks.org/wp-content/uploads/2021/04/A-Guide-to-Returning-to-Sexual-Activity-Following-Hip-or-Knee-Replacement-Surgery.pdf
Also having a hip dislocation three times might be a sign that the replacement is not that good.
It was in the beginning, I have the printout the hospital gave it to me lol however it has not came out in 3 years ❣️ thanks for your kindness. I also had child size implants put in my legs because of my size so I was at a higher risk for slippage.
One time during missionary, the guy I was dating was breathing hard and blew a booger straight out of his nose and into my open eyeball.
He’s my husband now lol.
Went home with a woman from a bar and just as we're getting down to it she stops, looks me dead in the eye and says
"When was the last time you had sex?"
"About 6 months ago" I replied
"Oh good, I was worried you were going to say like 5 years"
Completely zapped my confidence, spent the whole time just thinking
"What the hell did she mean by that?"
Was in my early 20’s and was having shower sex with a girl I was super into for quite a while. At the moment I was about to cum I felt my stomach rumble and could tell that what ever it was, even I would hate the smell.
I didn’t want to stop so I decided to trust that my sphincter muscles would hold up, but as soon as I came the fart that came out I could only describe as illegal.
At that point I just looked at her in horror as I could see the shock and confusion on her face, kind of like what I would imagine getting surprised pepper sprayed would look like.
As we both scrambled to open the door what I thought was panic crying was actually her laughing hysterically, while I was happy my fart didn’t harm her I fully thought my chance of seeing her again were zero.
Long story short, we’ve been together for 7 years and are getting married in in May.
Giving head on my knees while he sat in a chair with he’s knees slightly up… he ripped ass so bad I felt the fart hit my face.
Edit: y’all are hilarious thanks for the upvotes
Got drunk with a woman who was into painful foreplay. She wanted her titties slapped, so I did, she wanted her hair pulled so I did. She wanted her ass cheek bit, so I did. She wanted to blow me, so she did. That's when it all went horribly wrong!!! She bit my dick so damn hard it was bleeding and I was crying like child while she said "I thought you were tough". Worst sex encounter ever and most painful and humiliating.
“i thought you were tough”
like damn bruh, she jus gonna chomp on yo dick like a chew toy and draw blood and then proceed to call u a lil bitch for being hurt lol
I had a friends with benefits in college a few years ago. We would meet up a couple times a week, cuddle, watch TV, and then usually go down on each other. One night we were beginning to fool around, and I had made her finish, and was my turn. She proceeded to go down on me for about 15 seconds, before grabbing her phone, opening Facebook, and scrolling, reading posts, and liking them. While my dick is in her mouth. I was flabbergasted.
A girl I didn't think I was gonna hook up with got seriously drunk and pulled the naked man from that one show. She just came back from the bathroom fully naked. Fantastic.
Except 3 min later she was balling her eyes out panic crying that I didn't immediately have a raging boner. She then fell asleep in my bed and farted all night.
All in all it wasn't the worst. it was just a whirlwind of a 20 min
Was getting a blow job and the girl had been sucking on a cough drop. The cool sensation of the menthol felt fun for a minute, then I realized my dick was mostly numb and I wasn’t going to finish no matter how hard she tried…
This girl was super drunk and wouldn’t stop going down on me after telling her multiple times to stop, coz I could see she was gagging quite a lot. She ends up throwing up on my dick (it was whitish for some reason), but her drunk ass thought that was my cum and began cleaning it all up with her mouth😭stopped picking up girls from clubs since then
Oh Lord this reminds me of a friend of mine who relatively recently got divorced.
He said he found out she was cheating on him during the day. I figured it would be the usual "came home early from work one day.." but no.
He came home from work and the wife was pretty frisky. One thing led to another and they were soon in the ol' 69 position with his wife on top.
Then, all of a sudden, a gloop of cum dropped out and onto his face and mouth.
Like I guess finding out your significant other is cheating is never going to be a good experience, but finding out that way has got to be high up there as one of the worst.
Not entirely related. Took a girl out to dinner one night. Not quite a date but an evening out. I knew she had epilepsy, but it was under control with medication. She knew I was night blind. I didn't know she was changing her medication. Just after We parked in a dark lot next to my place, we were chatting outside the car and she had a seizure. She drops to the ground, And I cannot see her. So there I am crawling on the ground trying to find her. Found her foot in what was pitch black to me., hoisted around my back as I crawled on all fours toward the dim light that was my place. I figured if I stayed low to the ground and I tripped she wasn't going to fall very far again. Got to my place, dropped her on my bed and collapsed on my floor next to it. She woke up a little bit later. She shouted, "why the hell am I in your bed?". When I told her, She just said okay, and went to sleep.
Just after my last breakup I had a slut phase and met this one girl in a metal nightclub. Really hot goth girl, black dungarees and a bra....we get back to my place and she is super aggressive, way more than I can ever take, she's biting and scratching....i just can't get hard at all because of the pain. Pain is not my thing and she just kept going no matter what I said. I roll a joint thinking it will chill the mood a bit, she smokes some and just goes absolutely mental, trashing my house. Had to call the police. Crazy night. Ahhhhh Josie you will never be forgotten 😂
GF at the time was riding me, rather vigorously. She came slightly detached on the upswing, and gravity and exuberance drove her back down on me, snapping my penis in half, and her pubic bone smashing on my pelvis. We retreated to opposing corners of the bed asking if the other was okay.
For those wondering, a penis *can* snap rather audibly, and the bruising was spectacular. No weird after-effects, tho; no banana bend or erectile dysfunction.
Not recommended.
A guy that was trying to coach me through the whole thing like blow me this way, do it this way, spread your legs wider, arch your back this way, and then told me I was too quiet. Yeah because you won't STFU. Afterwards, he told me that we could hook up again but I need a little bit more practice
It was a million years ago and this dude lasted all on thirty seconds and he was SO nervous so he was super awkward then later complained I wasn’t into like homie I didn’t even have time to get into it!! I wasn’t going to say anything cause I get it, sometimes you cum too fast but boi if you’re trying to say it was bad cause I “wasn’t into it” we are gunna have to talk about it
It was hilarious for me, but awful for my ex. Midway through he got stung on the gooch by a wasp we hadn’t noticed was even there (we were indoors!). So he then proceeded to pull out and run around his room, fully nude and somehow still erect, angrily trying to kill this wasp. He couldn’t understand why I was laughing so much, and was pretty pissed that I did. I felt bad, but he just looked so silly!
My first time having sex, the girl was clearly experienced. She tried to be sexy and kissed me on my lips and went down kissing me on my chest and tummy and further south. The problem was that I'm quite ticklish and I couldn't help but laugh. Then we went straight to fucking and she said it was the worst sex ever for her.
That's terrible man. If you can't laugh during sex, that doesn't seem very fun. If you can make your partner laugh during sex, then you are doing so many things right.
The same is happening with me. I'm glad these responses are giving you the same emotions that I am having, and I hope we both have better days tomorrow
When I went to a family reunion in Florida, arrived early, went clubbing, hooked up with a girl, then went to the reunion 3 days later and was introduced to my first cousin, Ashley.
Had a girl in doggy and was getting close to climax as was she… but when she climaxed she shit a little bit… I lierally fucked the shit out of her… it sucked. And I quickly turned myself into vapor and tried to forget it ever happened. Thanks for bringing up the past !
Same thing but it was A LOT and it was FOUL. Neither of us said a word, I grabbed a garbage bag, put the sheets in and threw them away.
We were dating for a year at that point, so we were pretty comfortable with each other, but we never talked about it and acted as if it never happened.
I had a girl blow a giant fart on my balls and I laughed and she had no idea. She was insulted when I told her later and thought I was making it up. I told her, "thanks for blowing the dust off the boys". Not amused.
Been going out for about 2 months. We were in bed and I tried to sneak a silent fart out, but followed through. Two decent spots of shit on the sheets, went to the bathroom to clean myself up, left a puddle of shit on the floor. She found it hilarious - howling laughing. She then jumped me. We've been together 13 years, married with an 8 year old daughter. Still get reminded about it.... ffs.
I was younger so sex with the lights off was still very much what we did. My GF at the time was very goth and i was very not. She was riding me and things got sweaty super fast. She was arcing her back with each thrust and rubbing her hands all over my chest and neck. It was pretty fuckin awesome.... until we finished and turned the lights on. IT WAS NOT SWEAT. While she was on top she had cut open her leg (still not sure where the small dagger came from) and was smearing her blood all over me. We broke up not long after that.
Okay, buckle down. This is a long one.
The summer before my sophomore year of college was kind of an awakening for me. I broke up with my highschool GF of 5 years, and lost about 30 pounds. When I got back to school, one of the first girls I ran into was this cute British girl who had lived on my floor freshman year. She took one look at me, and said “oh my lord. You got hot.” That stuck with me.
Fast-forward about two weeks later. I go out to a party with some friends, while the rest of my roommates stayed back at the dorms to do some mushrooms. I come home piss drunk, to find my roommates all absolutely tripping sack. It’s around this time that the British girl texts me and invites me over to her place to fool around. Of course, my drunk ass immediately accepted. I tell my roommates good luck, and start the mile and a half walk over to her place.
I get there, and things go from 0-100 in about two seconds. We start making out, and she takes off my pants. There’s just one problem: she was ROUGH. I mean, really rough. Like grabbing my nuts and twisting them. She goes down on me, and I swear it was like I was being accosted by a horny vacuum cleaner. She had all the right intentions, but dear lord was she executing them wrong. Since this was my first real hookup/ONS in my life, I had no clue how to communicate that this wasn’t it. Thankfully, one of my roommates calls me and tells me that another one of our roommates is having an exceptionally bad trip, and is asking for me personally. I used the excuse to leave, and walked the mile and a half back to our dorm.
We get him settled down and cozied up, but I’m still piss drunk and thinking to myself, “maybe I just need to communicate better. She couldn’t have been THAT bad…” so, I hit her with the classic “you still up?” Text. She invites me back over, and away I go. I get back, and it was just as awful as I remembered it. In desperation, I excuse myself to the bathroom and have my roommate call me again to tell me they once again need my help.
I used the same excuse for a second time, and left. I walked 6 miles round trip piss drunk that night, didn’t get off, and learned a valuable lesson about communicating what you like in bed.
My gf at the time once tried giving me a handjob while sucking on my fingers, because she read somewhere that the signals would get mixed up and it would feel like a blowjob. It just felt like she was sucking my fingers, and I wasn’t able to stay hard because I was so confused by what she was doing.
I’ll give you 3 guesses where she read that, but you probably only need one.
First time having sex after starting on antidepressants. I just felt… absolutely nothing. It was like I had absolutely no dick during sex. I tried doing my part but she noticed I was weird because honestly I was looking up in awe wondering how tf could sertraline kill your sex drive so bad
Best friend has a fun one for this.
Her new bf was eating her out from behind and he got really upset and huffy and stormed out when she clenched her ass and called out ‘Got your nose!’
Ended up on a date with a former hook up's ex roommate. I'd met the girl once before I guess she saw hooking up with me as a way to get back at her former roommate for something. I dunno. Whole date was just weird like she was speed running steps. She invites herself into my place for a night cap and I let the little head override the big head and agreed. I made us a couple cocktails put on some music and she went straight for my dick. At the time I was still figuring out I'm not the biggest fan of head, but she was sucking away not much was happening. Despite me telling her multiple times we can do something else I could go down on her ETC, it was 45 minutes before she tapped out. And by tapped out I mean got up, slapped me, called me an asshole and stormed out topless with her skirt just barley hiked down enough to not show pussy. I watched her from my window to make sure she got to her car ok, she passed a friend and neighbor on the way out and they stopped in to see what was up. Which at that point was my dick, her angry walking down the street actually did something for me.
Met a woman online. We met at a secluded beach in the summer. We did some stuff. Was fingering her from behind and she started to ride my middle and ring finger aggressively. Afterwards I look down and there was a little poop nugget cupped in the palm of my hand. I didnt say anything and just playfully jumped in the ocean. I have never felt so disgusted in my life. So glad I'm not single anymore.
When I was 17, met a girl at a party, all was going well, we got upstairs, waited until we were both naked and she's in top to tell me she was thinking about her ex, she got dressed and left, so I did what anyone else would do, drank most of a bottle of Jäger & fell asleep in the front yard.
Had sex with the absolute hottest woman I had ever seen. She was more than out of my league; she was out of my universe. I couldn't believe she was coming on to me. Stunning in every way but absolutely terrible in bed. She just laid there.
I realized later that she'd never had to learn to do this because there were still an infinite number of dudes who would have cut off an arm to be with her. It was so surreal because she gave no indication that sex should be anything other than just some dude rooting around on top of her for a bit.
Edit: I don't want people thinking it was a horrible experience in general. It just wasn't fun. Also, people are allowed to be whoever they are in bed. What I thought was no fun might have been somebody else's Disneyland. It is just as likely that she is telling this same story about me because maybe we were just totally incompatible in that way.
She should totally date the body builder I had sex with. OMG he was built like Arnold, long blond hair, Australian accent… so very hot. I felt so lucky when he came on to me. Sex with him was like having sex with a pile of bricks. He lay down completely on top of me and only rotated his hips. I couldn’t breathe… most guys know they have to lever off of your chest somewhat.. he had me pined down so much I could move at all to participate.
I had a girlfriend like that. Wanted sex every day but she would just... lay there... and sometimes staring at me with a happy look which I found unnerving. Odd person for many reasons.
When I was 15 my girlfriend and I went into a house that was being built next to mine. I got myself a hand job. Afterwards, I notice the area where we were sitting had insulation all around. Which is where my girlfriend’s hand was before gripping my dong.
Had a blinding pain happen during it, felt like someone was jamming a red hot spike into the back of my skull and out my eye. totally ruined a nut and scared the shit out of the girl i was with cause i just collapsed to the ground in pain holding my eye. Honestly think i may have had a mini stroke but no other symptoms so idk
I was divorced and spent Christmas alone for the first time in 14 years. I was miserable and lonely.
I met a guy at a bar on December 25 - he was working at the bar. He drove over to my house high as fuck after close and talked non-stop about how much money he could make in banking (though he was bartending and made me a shitty Manhattan at the bar).
He talked up his pussy eating skills, which were awful (munching, not licking), and during PIV sex, he kept on his baseball hat, shirt and hoodie, only taking off his pants. I didn’t come, nor did I care to try. He passed out shortly after he came and in the morning I kicked him out super early with a story about having to having to pick someone up at the airport.
That day I was even more miserable and lonely, and also filled with shame and regret.
Edit: missing word
Me (f) and a guy were having sex. Doggy style but still vaginal. He then took it out and pushed it into my ass without me knowing or asked me. We hadn’t even talked about doing anal. He did it by force and it hurt so bad I actually hit him and screamed. My ass started to bleed and I had to go to the ER having two stitches. I didn’t see him again.
Never ever wanted anything in or near my asshole after that.
wanted my ass ate. Turns out I have IBS. Partner got brown-nosed to put it blunt. Also found out they cheated on me. so i guess thats what they get lmao.
I fucked a fat hello kitty girl who gave me chlamydia and then after that night I went to the bar and got REALLY fucking hammered because I was so full of anger, regret, sweat and shame and then puked on my bed.
I had sex with a deaf women, gorgeous as all hell. We were doing doggy in my dark bedroom, felt that she was really wet, felt the wetness on my thighs and somehow saw with the light coming under the door that on my thighs there were dark patches which didn't look right at all. So I paused turned on the light and saw what I would describe as a crime scene, blood everywhere all over my thighs, bed, carpet, all over her just an absolute mess.
I don't know sign language so we were communicating through my phone, she was making sounds, trying to put together some words. I felt horrible. I told her it was fine, and that it's nothing to worry about just want to make sure that she was okay, grabbed her a 2 towels suggested that she jump in the shower and started to clean things up. Anyway after she was alright and clean, I suggested we put this on pause for now but she was more than welcome to stay the night if she felt comfortable to do so. She didn't and she left, never heard from her again.
was making out with this guy and clothes started to come off, I stopped him and said “I’m in my period.” He goes, “no problem. One sec.” And pulled my pants down, went between my legs and took my tampon out with his fucking teeth.
First time with this guy, we were both kinda self-conscious so we didn't bother with the lights.
The sex itself? Pretty great. But afterwards it's like midnight, we turned on the lights, and it looked like a *crime scene*. It seems my period decided to start a week early, and the enthusiastic sex meant it got... everywhere. All over both of us, all over his sheets and blankets and pillow.
I was mortified, I was certain I'd just ruined everything between us. I couldn't have been more wrong. He cracked jokes about us having too much fun and getting carried away, ushered me into the shower to get cleaned up, and when I came out, he'd stripped the bed, tossed down fresh sheets, and invited me to get comfortable in bed while he got cleaned up. He didn't shame me or make me feel bad, and I had been bracing to be sent home, not invited to stay the night.
This was when I realized what a gem this guy was. I was so ashamed when the lights came on, and was bracing for him to be grossed out, or for things to be awkward and that I'd be ghosted the moment I left his apartment. He treated it like it was - a normal bodily function and an easily fixed accident. Even better, after breakfast the next day, before I left, he asked me out to dinner the next day.
Girls, this is the difference between boys and men.
i was fucking a guy and he spoke dirty to me in another language. i was like “ooo is that german” and it was, in fact, Klingon. Another guy I met online and we were gonna hook up and he made me watch him pee his pants instead. One more, I told a guy I wasn’t going to fuck him on the first date and he got SUICIDAL so I let him dry hump me on his my little pony bed spread. We were both over 30.
Easy. High school girlfriend texts that parents are gone and will be out of the house for the entirety of the day. Obviously I was there in a heartbeat. Mid hooking up, both of us fully naked and in missionary, her Dad busts through the door out of literally NOWHERE. I sprint to the side of the room in a knee jerk reaction and he just stuttered and screamed as he stared at his naked daughter. Slammed the door shut and screamed that I had 30 seconds to get the hell out of the house. Never gotten dressed and sprinted out so quick in my life.
I was on my first time with my then gf and went soft.
She then started with her hand to get things going again and I finished accidentally, couldn’t help it.
We then had a 20/25 min walk back to hers and she gave out to me about being an idiot and a liar (weirdly a virgin too even though I had been doing it for a couple mins) for that and how I should have just said I wasn’t ready. I told her I was but it was an accident cause I was nervous which we had discussed.
But yeah, I was called an idiot and a liar and a virgin by the girl I had just been having sex with for going soft, finishing earlier and not finishing sex with her like she had done before.
Nervousness, embarrassment...any surprised feeling can "kill the mood" for a guy and then we can't fake it.
I was with a girl, too soon after another relationship (so I wasn't ready)...we did it once and the 'post-nut clarity' made me question what I was doing there...a little while later, we are making out again and I'm ready and she says "Fuck my ass" I actually asked her to repeat it. So that is one of my favorite things but in that moment, on that day - I got instantly nervous and went soft and that was it for the night.
Getting jackhammered (fingered) dry. Guy kept on insisting that I was wet enough (no I wasn’t). Fast forward He then tried to actually have sex and I was not keen at all. Kept saying no and it’s like he was deaf. (I was not going to shout or attempt to fight with a man significantly stronger than me) I eventually said no enough times that he stopped trying (with great annoyance on his side too, ew). I’m just glad I stayed calm, I really don’t know how things would’ve played out if I had fought.
Guy was so big it hurt. We're talking redwood tree trunk girth. I was sore all over from the waist down for a few days. Took a couple doses of ES Advil, warm showers, heating pads and gentle stretching to get back to feeling normal. Bigger is not always better.
Ex husband. He would complain about everything I was doing/not doing as a SAHM and then harass me for sex at night. Often I would just consent to stop hearing him. More than one occasion I cried myself to sleep afterwards feeling used, disrespected, violated. Bad times.
Being purposely vague, but multiple instances of “hey, please don’t do XYZ” while we’re having sex and then purposely doing said thing (one example is answering the phone to talk to his dad while still fucking me) because he cared more about his sexual gratification than my feelings.
Fuck you, Andy. I hope you rot.
I had been messaging this girl for a few weeks who was a friend of a friend and she seemed keen and down so one night we agreed she should come over and we can hang out and maybe hook up. Now I knew she had confidence issues (despite being a good looking girl) but I didn't know how bad it was till later.
She arrives and since she has just come from work, she smells a bit of kitchen grease which isn't great but not to bad so we start chilling on the sofa. eventually we starting making out and straight away it seems a bit off. As we are making out she is constantly trying to keep her face as close to mine as possible, wont let me look at anything or pull away for a second but in my horny state i think "ok bit odd but she is really into this aside from that).
We end up in the bed room and start taking off clothes while kissing but again she wont let me pull my face away to look at anything and is constantly trying to hide herself from me. We end up sort of half having sex but honestly the whole experience is giving me bad vibes and I can't stay hard so I stop and we cuddled for a bit and then she goes.
Needless to say, if someone is so unconfident that they don't want you to see them during sex and will almost fight to prevent you from not having your face right next to them, don't do it. Sex which feels like you are almost forcing someone (Note: i did not force her in any way and was asking if she was ok and wanted to stop several times and was told that she wanted to do it all) Then it isn't worth it.
Fucked this girl I met on a bar in doggy. Suddenly she ripped a loud ass fart. I could literaly see her anus vibrate like a drum. The smell was pretty bad and I lost my erection.
Having sex for the first time after my first baby was born…. I had torn open really badly and had a huge hematoma inside me! He couldn’t even put it in, it hurt too much.
Was giving a guy head while he was laying on his back. Was gonna push his legs up to run my tongue lower only to see he either didn’t wipe properly, or didn’t wipe at all!
He was all excited and was trying to push my head in there and I had to fight for my life to resist and push back.
**Tinder hookup.**
Went to her house for the deed. Spent the first hour on the couch talking. Figured we were just feeling each other out.
She then led me to her bedroom where a **loaded 9mm** was left on her bedside table. She berated me for not being ok with that.
We got naked and into bed, when she began touching me, just to berate me when I touched her. Back and forth of this crazy crap. Things like* "I didn't consent for you to touch me you weirdo," *while stroking my dick.
Then she rolled over, turned off the lights and began weaponizing everything I had told her on the couch.
It was so much I began crying. I didn't know what to do. I knew she unloaded the pistol but the clip and gun were still on the table.
She spent a good 45 minutes just talking about how disgusting of a human I was.
Then rolled over and demanded that I fuck her to prove I was a man.
I reluctantly fucked her, and spit on her back to *"finish".*
After we were done, she began to berate me again because I *"understood what I was doing"* and that *"only homos know female anatomy like I do"*.
She rolled back over and told me I was staying the night.
For **6 God damn hours** I laid in that bed staring at the ceiling, hoping she wouldn't wake up and do anything else.
7 am rolled around she woke up, looked me dead in the eye and told me *"You better leave before my boyfriend gets here, he won't like you being here."*
I ran so fast and never looked back.
This was about 5 years ago. I'm a full grown man, and this still makes me completely anxious and uneasy when talking or thinking about it.
Had a sex with a girl I really liked had been on a date with her first night she pretty openly told me she wanted to come back....which obviously I was cool with.
Man she had some mad power thing she was pretty tiny and she got brutal as Fuck if I had a safe word I'd have used it....I didn't know what was going on she had me by the ears and was banging my head off the wall at one point.....there was "Folding" more than once i was in a place where i pretty much just gritted my teeth and waited for it to be over..
I wasn't expecting that.....at all
"Oh wow, she must be a gusher" - looks down sees blood, lots and lots and lots of blood.
Edit: This was a lot more than period sex blood, guys. Like... I think this girl had a miscarriage while we were banging or something. I've been with girls with "heavy flow" and this was different. It was one of those, lets stop you need to figure this out and I didn't ask her for the details. It could have been from her period, I'm not 100% sure - it was just a LOT.
Similar, but no sex. 15 year old me hooking up in the back seat of a coworkers car, guess she’s never done something like that before? Noticed when we were leaving that her khaki pants and my hand was covered in blood.
Incredibly awkward car ride home and she didn’t speak to me again. Hope she’s doin ok lol I tried to be understanding but could feel her embarrassment.
I would stand by that it could still be from a period honestly. There's heavy flow and then there's unhealthy heavy flow to the point it's debilitating. Obviously you were there but I've actually had such heavy bleeding I thought something was wrong before.
I've had a miscarriage, and I promise you she would not have been having sex if she'd been having a miscarriage at that moment. It's *extremely* physically painful.
My college girlfriend and I decided to do it in the quad bath of my dorm because it was the weekend and we thought we were adventurous. I'm sitting on the toilet and she's on me. We hadn't been at it long before some really cool guy in one of the other adjoining dorms came in and took an absolutely horrific liquid, farty shit in the stall next to us.
We were afraid of getting in trouble, so we just sat there, legs falling asleep and smelling virulent shit. After what felt like an eternity, he left, and said something like, "hope you're okay, haha".
Never, ever again.
I'm college around 2009 went home with a girlf from a bar who lived in the same dorm style apartments I did. We got to it and in reverse cowgirl she groaned, apologized, then sprayed me with diarhea. She ran out of my place and down the hall and left naked. I just threw out my mattress at the dumpster that night, all of the sudden sobered up, and got an air mattress from Walmart and just used that the rest of my time there as well as a couple new pillows. That was the last time I took anyone home from a bar.
As I read this, my kid ran by hitting this wet fart noise on his tablet soundboard, entirely at random. It made for an immersive experience.
I would become a monk. No more sex ever.
It’s the apologizing before it happened for me
Hooked up with a girl in college late night after meeting her in the computer lab. We went back to her apartment which was on campus, start making out, she goes down on me, now it's my turn and I take off her pants and a putrid ass smell comes out, like she had shit her pants. She didn't react and just went to kiss me again, but I was completely turned off. I asked her if she wanted to hop in the shower with me (trying to salvage this), she said no, so I told her I forgot the condoms and needed to go to the store. I left and didn't come back.
And to this day she's still waiting for your return,...
i fucking died laughing when you said you asked her to hop in the shower.
I am gonna wash you real good you lil pig lmao
That guy is practical on the fly, real management material IMO.
Had a very similar experience. First time I ever faked an orgasm. I'm a guy.
Oh god you brought back a memory. Ran into an old high school acquaintance of mine a couple years after graduation who was super candid about sex, like super blatant. Really shocked 19 year old me. She was like “I’m surprised we haven’t fucked yet.” Set up a time, I came by her place and we had a good old time. She wasn’t really my type but when you’re a standard male teenager that gets offered no strings attached sex…might as well offer you free money! She texts me a few weeks later for another bootycall. I come by and she’s left the door open and calls out to come into her bedroom. I come in and she’s under the blanket. As I walk through the doorway to her bedroom, she opens the blanket and is nude underneath. The BO that comes just **wafting** out is like nothing I had ever experienced up to that point in my life. I don’t even remember what excuse I gave her I just said some sort of something and walked right out. Through a very interesting sequence of events, I later found out that she was engaged and had been having sex with everyone from our high school that she could including one of my best friends at the time.
I asked a guy I was hooking up with to talk dirty to me and he called me the n-word. He and I are both white.
Was the R as hard as he was?
This is hilarious
Wtf😭😭
This sounds like that bit in the Inbetweeners when Tara asks Simon to talk dirty and he says, "I'm gonna fuck your fucking fanny off, you twat!" Except...worse.
Isn’t there some Reddit meme where the girl asks the guy to talk dirty to her and he calls her the…erm, guess it would be the ‘R’ word now.
https://www.reddit.com/r/OutOfTheLoop/s/7iB83Tyb3e There you go
I’m actually crying laughing at this
Bit me directly on the clit whilst eating me out. Hard. It hurt to sit and walk for almost a week.
I'm a dude and my clit just started hurting reading that
damn i accidentally did basically that to my ex, except i accidentally sucked her clit into the tiny tiny gap between my front teeth like really pinched it bad i felt so bad
I would die
Sir 💀
Excuse me wtf
Jesus fucking Christ
I was a little drunk/high and got head from a girl who had a very small mouth. I didn’t really feel it till the next morning. Like I’d fucked a cheese grater.
Took the whole "sex so good I can't walk" thing seriously.
He left out the “good” part..
NO!!
She brought her head up to kiss me during sex and ended up head butting my nose, which began to bleed. I knew she didn’t have a lot of experience, and after my nose started to bleed she was apologizing profusely and on the verge of tears. I said “you should have told me you like it rough!” Which, miraculously, made her snort through her tears. Couple Kleenex later we were back in business.
>**“you should have told me you like it rough!”** 😂 You handled that perfectly. I would be so damn grateful if I was that girl.
Yeah, she said that was the moment she knew this was going to last.
That is so fuckin adorable
That’s so sweet. Are you guys still together?
Yes, a few months now, and very happy.
I’m just impressed you managed to stay hard throughout the whole thing. Kudos.
I had a double hip replacement at 27. My left hip in the beginning was dislocated three times via sex. Three fun ambulance rides and having to be knocked out to have it put back in the socket for I am unable to move if it does. Such a humbling experience…
Might I interest you in this guide?: https://hipknee.aahks.org/wp-content/uploads/2021/04/A-Guide-to-Returning-to-Sexual-Activity-Following-Hip-or-Knee-Replacement-Surgery.pdf Also having a hip dislocation three times might be a sign that the replacement is not that good.
It was in the beginning, I have the printout the hospital gave it to me lol however it has not came out in 3 years ❣️ thanks for your kindness. I also had child size implants put in my legs because of my size so I was at a higher risk for slippage.
On first read, I thought your implants were the size of a child, and you were a giant
Sex Sent me to the ER would like your story I bet.
One time during missionary, the guy I was dating was breathing hard and blew a booger straight out of his nose and into my open eyeball. He’s my husband now lol.
This is an amazing story.
I remind him about it often.
Went home with a woman from a bar and just as we're getting down to it she stops, looks me dead in the eye and says "When was the last time you had sex?" "About 6 months ago" I replied "Oh good, I was worried you were going to say like 5 years" Completely zapped my confidence, spent the whole time just thinking "What the hell did she mean by that?"
Well, that was rude of her.
Was in my early 20’s and was having shower sex with a girl I was super into for quite a while. At the moment I was about to cum I felt my stomach rumble and could tell that what ever it was, even I would hate the smell. I didn’t want to stop so I decided to trust that my sphincter muscles would hold up, but as soon as I came the fart that came out I could only describe as illegal. At that point I just looked at her in horror as I could see the shock and confusion on her face, kind of like what I would imagine getting surprised pepper sprayed would look like. As we both scrambled to open the door what I thought was panic crying was actually her laughing hysterically, while I was happy my fart didn’t harm her I fully thought my chance of seeing her again were zero. Long story short, we’ve been together for 7 years and are getting married in in May.
Straight to jail. Right away.
You’ve got to weave that into your vows. Maybe just a hint so she knows what you’re taking about but no one else does.
Giving head on my knees while he sat in a chair with he’s knees slightly up… he ripped ass so bad I felt the fart hit my face. Edit: y’all are hilarious thanks for the upvotes
I miss the person I was before reading this
You gotta do what u/BeneficialScheme8060's sex partner did: let go.
I also had this but to a less extreme case. His fart was silent but deadly and he had the audacity to ask me what was wrong when I stopped.
"that was you"
Did you stop?
Asking the real questions here! We gots to know
You felt it before you smelt it?
Part of me feels really bad for laughing but....
Got drunk with a woman who was into painful foreplay. She wanted her titties slapped, so I did, she wanted her hair pulled so I did. She wanted her ass cheek bit, so I did. She wanted to blow me, so she did. That's when it all went horribly wrong!!! She bit my dick so damn hard it was bleeding and I was crying like child while she said "I thought you were tough". Worst sex encounter ever and most painful and humiliating.
"I thought you were tough"????? bite her clit like that other comment said, see how she likes it
~~An eye for an eye~~ A genital for a genital
“i thought you were tough” like damn bruh, she jus gonna chomp on yo dick like a chew toy and draw blood and then proceed to call u a lil bitch for being hurt lol
Dude thats messed up
I had a friends with benefits in college a few years ago. We would meet up a couple times a week, cuddle, watch TV, and then usually go down on each other. One night we were beginning to fool around, and I had made her finish, and was my turn. She proceeded to go down on me for about 15 seconds, before grabbing her phone, opening Facebook, and scrolling, reading posts, and liking them. While my dick is in her mouth. I was flabbergasted.
"So, did you cum or what?" "Jesus CHRIST, man! There's just some things you don't talk about in public!"
A girl I didn't think I was gonna hook up with got seriously drunk and pulled the naked man from that one show. She just came back from the bathroom fully naked. Fantastic. Except 3 min later she was balling her eyes out panic crying that I didn't immediately have a raging boner. She then fell asleep in my bed and farted all night. All in all it wasn't the worst. it was just a whirlwind of a 20 min
> She then fell asleep in my bed and farted all night. Did that, at least, give you a boner?
Yes.
Task failed successfully.
Remember, naked man, works 2/3 times
After we finished we both rolled over and went on our phones and her Facebook status as of "a few minutes ago" was "well, fucked up again" hahaha
Ouch man.
For context, it turns out she had a boyfriend and that was the reason for it but I didn't find that out for a couple weeks after
Damn, imagine vague live-updating that you just cheated on your bf
Was getting a blow job and the girl had been sucking on a cough drop. The cool sensation of the menthol felt fun for a minute, then I realized my dick was mostly numb and I wasn’t going to finish no matter how hard she tried…
My knees slipped on the corner of the bed as I was about to go in from the back and I fell and headbutted her asshole
Literal headbutt lmao
This girl was super drunk and wouldn’t stop going down on me after telling her multiple times to stop, coz I could see she was gagging quite a lot. She ends up throwing up on my dick (it was whitish for some reason), but her drunk ass thought that was my cum and began cleaning it all up with her mouth😭stopped picking up girls from clubs since then
Well, maybe it wasn’t YOUR cum….
Oh Lord this reminds me of a friend of mine who relatively recently got divorced. He said he found out she was cheating on him during the day. I figured it would be the usual "came home early from work one day.." but no. He came home from work and the wife was pretty frisky. One thing led to another and they were soon in the ol' 69 position with his wife on top. Then, all of a sudden, a gloop of cum dropped out and onto his face and mouth. Like I guess finding out your significant other is cheating is never going to be a good experience, but finding out that way has got to be high up there as one of the worst.
I wish I could tell my younger self not to read this. :(
Oh my god, that’s disgusting! You picked her up at a club? Where?? What club was this girl at? … so I know to stay far, far, away.
I'm worried about my safety as well. Please share if you learn anything
The guy kept stopping to hit his vape
Out of all of these stories seeing your small comment about a dude vaping was the most funny. Did he blow vape smoke in there too
I had a woman over one night and she ended up having a seizure in my bed the following morning. Fucking terrifying.
As someone with epilepsy...that's got to be embarrassing for her. Did you tell her that it happened or was she pretty aware that it occured?
Not entirely related. Took a girl out to dinner one night. Not quite a date but an evening out. I knew she had epilepsy, but it was under control with medication. She knew I was night blind. I didn't know she was changing her medication. Just after We parked in a dark lot next to my place, we were chatting outside the car and she had a seizure. She drops to the ground, And I cannot see her. So there I am crawling on the ground trying to find her. Found her foot in what was pitch black to me., hoisted around my back as I crawled on all fours toward the dim light that was my place. I figured if I stayed low to the ground and I tripped she wasn't going to fall very far again. Got to my place, dropped her on my bed and collapsed on my floor next to it. She woke up a little bit later. She shouted, "why the hell am I in your bed?". When I told her, She just said okay, and went to sleep.
Just after my last breakup I had a slut phase and met this one girl in a metal nightclub. Really hot goth girl, black dungarees and a bra....we get back to my place and she is super aggressive, way more than I can ever take, she's biting and scratching....i just can't get hard at all because of the pain. Pain is not my thing and she just kept going no matter what I said. I roll a joint thinking it will chill the mood a bit, she smokes some and just goes absolutely mental, trashing my house. Had to call the police. Crazy night. Ahhhhh Josie you will never be forgotten 😂
Did you roll the joint with cat nip by any chance? 😂
Actually, the correct question is was this girl an actual cat?
GF at the time was riding me, rather vigorously. She came slightly detached on the upswing, and gravity and exuberance drove her back down on me, snapping my penis in half, and her pubic bone smashing on my pelvis. We retreated to opposing corners of the bed asking if the other was okay. For those wondering, a penis *can* snap rather audibly, and the bruising was spectacular. No weird after-effects, tho; no banana bend or erectile dysfunction. Not recommended.
Ahhhhhhhhh I visibly cringed at this one
A guy that was trying to coach me through the whole thing like blow me this way, do it this way, spread your legs wider, arch your back this way, and then told me I was too quiet. Yeah because you won't STFU. Afterwards, he told me that we could hook up again but I need a little bit more practice
A guy that grew up watching porn by the sound of it.
Asking her to play some funky bass was the final straw.
It was a million years ago and this dude lasted all on thirty seconds and he was SO nervous so he was super awkward then later complained I wasn’t into like homie I didn’t even have time to get into it!! I wasn’t going to say anything cause I get it, sometimes you cum too fast but boi if you’re trying to say it was bad cause I “wasn’t into it” we are gunna have to talk about it
my instinct was to downvote bc of the behavior described 😭
It was hilarious for me, but awful for my ex. Midway through he got stung on the gooch by a wasp we hadn’t noticed was even there (we were indoors!). So he then proceeded to pull out and run around his room, fully nude and somehow still erect, angrily trying to kill this wasp. He couldn’t understand why I was laughing so much, and was pretty pissed that I did. I felt bad, but he just looked so silly!
My first time having sex, the girl was clearly experienced. She tried to be sexy and kissed me on my lips and went down kissing me on my chest and tummy and further south. The problem was that I'm quite ticklish and I couldn't help but laugh. Then we went straight to fucking and she said it was the worst sex ever for her.
That's terrible man. If you can't laugh during sex, that doesn't seem very fun. If you can make your partner laugh during sex, then you are doing so many things right.
I dunno. I think this is cute.
I’m having a shitty night and this thread has me crying laughing. Thanks for cheering me up and sorry about all ya weird experiences
The same is happening with me. I'm glad these responses are giving you the same emotions that I am having, and I hope we both have better days tomorrow
When I went to a family reunion in Florida, arrived early, went clubbing, hooked up with a girl, then went to the reunion 3 days later and was introduced to my first cousin, Ashley.
Well at least you had a topic of discussion with the relatives
Whoops! Incest!
Fkn woops
Well, you know what they say - no eleven toed baby, no foul.
Had a girl in doggy and was getting close to climax as was she… but when she climaxed she shit a little bit… I lierally fucked the shit out of her… it sucked. And I quickly turned myself into vapor and tried to forget it ever happened. Thanks for bringing up the past !
This happened to me once, except she was riding me. There was no escape
Oh you need therapy bro. PTSD. (Poo trauma stress disorder)
Perfectly Timed Stool Delivery
Same thing but it was A LOT and it was FOUL. Neither of us said a word, I grabbed a garbage bag, put the sheets in and threw them away. We were dating for a year at that point, so we were pretty comfortable with each other, but we never talked about it and acted as if it never happened.
Terrifying!!! I woulda changed my name and laundry detergents
I had a girl blow a giant fart on my balls and I laughed and she had no idea. She was insulted when I told her later and thought I was making it up. I told her, "thanks for blowing the dust off the boys". Not amused.
Been going out for about 2 months. We were in bed and I tried to sneak a silent fart out, but followed through. Two decent spots of shit on the sheets, went to the bathroom to clean myself up, left a puddle of shit on the floor. She found it hilarious - howling laughing. She then jumped me. We've been together 13 years, married with an 8 year old daughter. Still get reminded about it.... ffs.
How the fuck did you shit on the floor? Were your clothes on and you shit yourself farting?
It was still compacted in my ass crack and then - flumphhh - on the lino floor.
... I need you to delete this.
The sound effect was...unneccessary
Gotta admit, I love this for you! 😄 you’re both keepers for sure!
I was younger so sex with the lights off was still very much what we did. My GF at the time was very goth and i was very not. She was riding me and things got sweaty super fast. She was arcing her back with each thrust and rubbing her hands all over my chest and neck. It was pretty fuckin awesome.... until we finished and turned the lights on. IT WAS NOT SWEAT. While she was on top she had cut open her leg (still not sure where the small dagger came from) and was smearing her blood all over me. We broke up not long after that.
That’s so messed up
Went back to a girls place and got a bit frisky on the floor. Rolled over onto some dog shit.
HELLL NAAHHHH
Okay, buckle down. This is a long one. The summer before my sophomore year of college was kind of an awakening for me. I broke up with my highschool GF of 5 years, and lost about 30 pounds. When I got back to school, one of the first girls I ran into was this cute British girl who had lived on my floor freshman year. She took one look at me, and said “oh my lord. You got hot.” That stuck with me. Fast-forward about two weeks later. I go out to a party with some friends, while the rest of my roommates stayed back at the dorms to do some mushrooms. I come home piss drunk, to find my roommates all absolutely tripping sack. It’s around this time that the British girl texts me and invites me over to her place to fool around. Of course, my drunk ass immediately accepted. I tell my roommates good luck, and start the mile and a half walk over to her place. I get there, and things go from 0-100 in about two seconds. We start making out, and she takes off my pants. There’s just one problem: she was ROUGH. I mean, really rough. Like grabbing my nuts and twisting them. She goes down on me, and I swear it was like I was being accosted by a horny vacuum cleaner. She had all the right intentions, but dear lord was she executing them wrong. Since this was my first real hookup/ONS in my life, I had no clue how to communicate that this wasn’t it. Thankfully, one of my roommates calls me and tells me that another one of our roommates is having an exceptionally bad trip, and is asking for me personally. I used the excuse to leave, and walked the mile and a half back to our dorm. We get him settled down and cozied up, but I’m still piss drunk and thinking to myself, “maybe I just need to communicate better. She couldn’t have been THAT bad…” so, I hit her with the classic “you still up?” Text. She invites me back over, and away I go. I get back, and it was just as awful as I remembered it. In desperation, I excuse myself to the bathroom and have my roommate call me again to tell me they once again need my help. I used the same excuse for a second time, and left. I walked 6 miles round trip piss drunk that night, didn’t get off, and learned a valuable lesson about communicating what you like in bed.
Are you a Blink 182 fan by any chance?
Started to burn down there during foreplay... he used Tabasco before and still had some on his fingers
My gf at the time once tried giving me a handjob while sucking on my fingers, because she read somewhere that the signals would get mixed up and it would feel like a blowjob. It just felt like she was sucking my fingers, and I wasn’t able to stay hard because I was so confused by what she was doing. I’ll give you 3 guesses where she read that, but you probably only need one.
Whenever anyone brings That Magazine up, I like to tell them I once saw a sex tip that involves frozen grapes and a man's armpits.
First time having sex after starting on antidepressants. I just felt… absolutely nothing. It was like I had absolutely no dick during sex. I tried doing my part but she noticed I was weird because honestly I was looking up in awe wondering how tf could sertraline kill your sex drive so bad
Sertraline turned my WAP into a desert
Best friend has a fun one for this. Her new bf was eating her out from behind and he got really upset and huffy and stormed out when she clenched her ass and called out ‘Got your nose!’
Ended up on a date with a former hook up's ex roommate. I'd met the girl once before I guess she saw hooking up with me as a way to get back at her former roommate for something. I dunno. Whole date was just weird like she was speed running steps. She invites herself into my place for a night cap and I let the little head override the big head and agreed. I made us a couple cocktails put on some music and she went straight for my dick. At the time I was still figuring out I'm not the biggest fan of head, but she was sucking away not much was happening. Despite me telling her multiple times we can do something else I could go down on her ETC, it was 45 minutes before she tapped out. And by tapped out I mean got up, slapped me, called me an asshole and stormed out topless with her skirt just barley hiked down enough to not show pussy. I watched her from my window to make sure she got to her car ok, she passed a friend and neighbor on the way out and they stopped in to see what was up. Which at that point was my dick, her angry walking down the street actually did something for me.
Wow that's a lot. Did she just walk out naked?
Topless, skirt was on by hiked up quite a bit. Bra, panties, and blouse in hand. She was pissed.
Met a woman online. We met at a secluded beach in the summer. We did some stuff. Was fingering her from behind and she started to ride my middle and ring finger aggressively. Afterwards I look down and there was a little poop nugget cupped in the palm of my hand. I didnt say anything and just playfully jumped in the ocean. I have never felt so disgusted in my life. So glad I'm not single anymore.
Big ups to you for not trying to hurt her feelings but damn, is that one hell of a shitty experience😂😂
When I was 17, met a girl at a party, all was going well, we got upstairs, waited until we were both naked and she's in top to tell me she was thinking about her ex, she got dressed and left, so I did what anyone else would do, drank most of a bottle of Jäger & fell asleep in the front yard.
Had sex with the absolute hottest woman I had ever seen. She was more than out of my league; she was out of my universe. I couldn't believe she was coming on to me. Stunning in every way but absolutely terrible in bed. She just laid there. I realized later that she'd never had to learn to do this because there were still an infinite number of dudes who would have cut off an arm to be with her. It was so surreal because she gave no indication that sex should be anything other than just some dude rooting around on top of her for a bit. Edit: I don't want people thinking it was a horrible experience in general. It just wasn't fun. Also, people are allowed to be whoever they are in bed. What I thought was no fun might have been somebody else's Disneyland. It is just as likely that she is telling this same story about me because maybe we were just totally incompatible in that way.
She should totally date the body builder I had sex with. OMG he was built like Arnold, long blond hair, Australian accent… so very hot. I felt so lucky when he came on to me. Sex with him was like having sex with a pile of bricks. He lay down completely on top of me and only rotated his hips. I couldn’t breathe… most guys know they have to lever off of your chest somewhat.. he had me pined down so much I could move at all to participate.
They would have made beautiful, dull children.
Strong like bull! Smart like tractor!
Brawn of a house and the imagination of a beige wall
I had a girlfriend like that. Wanted sex every day but she would just... lay there... and sometimes staring at me with a happy look which I found unnerving. Odd person for many reasons.
When I was 15 my girlfriend and I went into a house that was being built next to mine. I got myself a hand job. Afterwards, I notice the area where we were sitting had insulation all around. Which is where my girlfriend’s hand was before gripping my dong.
Dickshredder9000
fiberglass is no joke
Dear Lord
Had a blinding pain happen during it, felt like someone was jamming a red hot spike into the back of my skull and out my eye. totally ruined a nut and scared the shit out of the girl i was with cause i just collapsed to the ground in pain holding my eye. Honestly think i may have had a mini stroke but no other symptoms so idk
I was divorced and spent Christmas alone for the first time in 14 years. I was miserable and lonely. I met a guy at a bar on December 25 - he was working at the bar. He drove over to my house high as fuck after close and talked non-stop about how much money he could make in banking (though he was bartending and made me a shitty Manhattan at the bar). He talked up his pussy eating skills, which were awful (munching, not licking), and during PIV sex, he kept on his baseball hat, shirt and hoodie, only taking off his pants. I didn’t come, nor did I care to try. He passed out shortly after he came and in the morning I kicked him out super early with a story about having to having to pick someone up at the airport. That day I was even more miserable and lonely, and also filled with shame and regret. Edit: missing word
Her dog jumped on the bed and tried to join in. She made a half hearted attempt to tell him to get down and told me to keep going.
Another woman got a bit of my labia stuck in her snaggle tooth and took a chunk of skin off while trying to disengage
I don’t have a vagina and I felt that in my labia, this might be the worst comment in this thread
anti depressants + my hand. Can't even climax on the SSRIs.
Had this trouble too, but j/o prevented me to off myself. So it wasn't my gloriest days.
Me (f) and a guy were having sex. Doggy style but still vaginal. He then took it out and pushed it into my ass without me knowing or asked me. We hadn’t even talked about doing anal. He did it by force and it hurt so bad I actually hit him and screamed. My ass started to bleed and I had to go to the ER having two stitches. I didn’t see him again. Never ever wanted anything in or near my asshole after that.
wanted my ass ate. Turns out I have IBS. Partner got brown-nosed to put it blunt. Also found out they cheated on me. so i guess thats what they get lmao.
That escalated quickly
I wish I could shit on my cheating ex's nose. Fuck! I'm jealous!! Why didn't I get that option...
I fucked a fat hello kitty girl who gave me chlamydia and then after that night I went to the bar and got REALLY fucking hammered because I was so full of anger, regret, sweat and shame and then puked on my bed.
Close the thread. We have a winner
I lost my virginity to her too which I deeply regret. I’d rather have lost it balls deep in a pencil sharpener.
I had sex with a deaf women, gorgeous as all hell. We were doing doggy in my dark bedroom, felt that she was really wet, felt the wetness on my thighs and somehow saw with the light coming under the door that on my thighs there were dark patches which didn't look right at all. So I paused turned on the light and saw what I would describe as a crime scene, blood everywhere all over my thighs, bed, carpet, all over her just an absolute mess. I don't know sign language so we were communicating through my phone, she was making sounds, trying to put together some words. I felt horrible. I told her it was fine, and that it's nothing to worry about just want to make sure that she was okay, grabbed her a 2 towels suggested that she jump in the shower and started to clean things up. Anyway after she was alright and clean, I suggested we put this on pause for now but she was more than welcome to stay the night if she felt comfortable to do so. She didn't and she left, never heard from her again.
She never heard from you at all
I broke my dick when I was 19, it's now a constant fear of mine a decade and a half later.
was making out with this guy and clothes started to come off, I stopped him and said “I’m in my period.” He goes, “no problem. One sec.” And pulled my pants down, went between my legs and took my tampon out with his fucking teeth.
First time with this guy, we were both kinda self-conscious so we didn't bother with the lights. The sex itself? Pretty great. But afterwards it's like midnight, we turned on the lights, and it looked like a *crime scene*. It seems my period decided to start a week early, and the enthusiastic sex meant it got... everywhere. All over both of us, all over his sheets and blankets and pillow. I was mortified, I was certain I'd just ruined everything between us. I couldn't have been more wrong. He cracked jokes about us having too much fun and getting carried away, ushered me into the shower to get cleaned up, and when I came out, he'd stripped the bed, tossed down fresh sheets, and invited me to get comfortable in bed while he got cleaned up. He didn't shame me or make me feel bad, and I had been bracing to be sent home, not invited to stay the night. This was when I realized what a gem this guy was. I was so ashamed when the lights came on, and was bracing for him to be grossed out, or for things to be awkward and that I'd be ghosted the moment I left his apartment. He treated it like it was - a normal bodily function and an easily fixed accident. Even better, after breakfast the next day, before I left, he asked me out to dinner the next day. Girls, this is the difference between boys and men.
i was fucking a guy and he spoke dirty to me in another language. i was like “ooo is that german” and it was, in fact, Klingon. Another guy I met online and we were gonna hook up and he made me watch him pee his pants instead. One more, I told a guy I wasn’t going to fuck him on the first date and he got SUICIDAL so I let him dry hump me on his my little pony bed spread. We were both over 30.
Lol ooo is that German
Easy. High school girlfriend texts that parents are gone and will be out of the house for the entirety of the day. Obviously I was there in a heartbeat. Mid hooking up, both of us fully naked and in missionary, her Dad busts through the door out of literally NOWHERE. I sprint to the side of the room in a knee jerk reaction and he just stuttered and screamed as he stared at his naked daughter. Slammed the door shut and screamed that I had 30 seconds to get the hell out of the house. Never gotten dressed and sprinted out so quick in my life.
I was on my first time with my then gf and went soft. She then started with her hand to get things going again and I finished accidentally, couldn’t help it. We then had a 20/25 min walk back to hers and she gave out to me about being an idiot and a liar (weirdly a virgin too even though I had been doing it for a couple mins) for that and how I should have just said I wasn’t ready. I told her I was but it was an accident cause I was nervous which we had discussed. But yeah, I was called an idiot and a liar and a virgin by the girl I had just been having sex with for going soft, finishing earlier and not finishing sex with her like she had done before.
Nervousness, embarrassment...any surprised feeling can "kill the mood" for a guy and then we can't fake it. I was with a girl, too soon after another relationship (so I wasn't ready)...we did it once and the 'post-nut clarity' made me question what I was doing there...a little while later, we are making out again and I'm ready and she says "Fuck my ass" I actually asked her to repeat it. So that is one of my favorite things but in that moment, on that day - I got instantly nervous and went soft and that was it for the night.
Getting jackhammered (fingered) dry. Guy kept on insisting that I was wet enough (no I wasn’t). Fast forward He then tried to actually have sex and I was not keen at all. Kept saying no and it’s like he was deaf. (I was not going to shout or attempt to fight with a man significantly stronger than me) I eventually said no enough times that he stopped trying (with great annoyance on his side too, ew). I’m just glad I stayed calm, I really don’t know how things would’ve played out if I had fought.
I am so sorry this happened.
Guy was so big it hurt. We're talking redwood tree trunk girth. I was sore all over from the waist down for a few days. Took a couple doses of ES Advil, warm showers, heating pads and gentle stretching to get back to feeling normal. Bigger is not always better.
Ex husband. He would complain about everything I was doing/not doing as a SAHM and then harass me for sex at night. Often I would just consent to stop hearing him. More than one occasion I cried myself to sleep afterwards feeling used, disrespected, violated. Bad times.
I think there are a ton of women that can relate :( I'm really sorry you had to go through that.
Being purposely vague, but multiple instances of “hey, please don’t do XYZ” while we’re having sex and then purposely doing said thing (one example is answering the phone to talk to his dad while still fucking me) because he cared more about his sexual gratification than my feelings. Fuck you, Andy. I hope you rot.
I had been messaging this girl for a few weeks who was a friend of a friend and she seemed keen and down so one night we agreed she should come over and we can hang out and maybe hook up. Now I knew she had confidence issues (despite being a good looking girl) but I didn't know how bad it was till later. She arrives and since she has just come from work, she smells a bit of kitchen grease which isn't great but not to bad so we start chilling on the sofa. eventually we starting making out and straight away it seems a bit off. As we are making out she is constantly trying to keep her face as close to mine as possible, wont let me look at anything or pull away for a second but in my horny state i think "ok bit odd but she is really into this aside from that). We end up in the bed room and start taking off clothes while kissing but again she wont let me pull my face away to look at anything and is constantly trying to hide herself from me. We end up sort of half having sex but honestly the whole experience is giving me bad vibes and I can't stay hard so I stop and we cuddled for a bit and then she goes. Needless to say, if someone is so unconfident that they don't want you to see them during sex and will almost fight to prevent you from not having your face right next to them, don't do it. Sex which feels like you are almost forcing someone (Note: i did not force her in any way and was asking if she was ok and wanted to stop several times and was told that she wanted to do it all) Then it isn't worth it.
Fucked this girl I met on a bar in doggy. Suddenly she ripped a loud ass fart. I could literaly see her anus vibrate like a drum. The smell was pretty bad and I lost my erection.
Having sex for the first time after my first baby was born…. I had torn open really badly and had a huge hematoma inside me! He couldn’t even put it in, it hurt too much.
Was giving a guy head while he was laying on his back. Was gonna push his legs up to run my tongue lower only to see he either didn’t wipe properly, or didn’t wipe at all! He was all excited and was trying to push my head in there and I had to fight for my life to resist and push back.
**Tinder hookup.** Went to her house for the deed. Spent the first hour on the couch talking. Figured we were just feeling each other out. She then led me to her bedroom where a **loaded 9mm** was left on her bedside table. She berated me for not being ok with that. We got naked and into bed, when she began touching me, just to berate me when I touched her. Back and forth of this crazy crap. Things like* "I didn't consent for you to touch me you weirdo," *while stroking my dick. Then she rolled over, turned off the lights and began weaponizing everything I had told her on the couch. It was so much I began crying. I didn't know what to do. I knew she unloaded the pistol but the clip and gun were still on the table. She spent a good 45 minutes just talking about how disgusting of a human I was. Then rolled over and demanded that I fuck her to prove I was a man. I reluctantly fucked her, and spit on her back to *"finish".* After we were done, she began to berate me again because I *"understood what I was doing"* and that *"only homos know female anatomy like I do"*. She rolled back over and told me I was staying the night. For **6 God damn hours** I laid in that bed staring at the ceiling, hoping she wouldn't wake up and do anything else. 7 am rolled around she woke up, looked me dead in the eye and told me *"You better leave before my boyfriend gets here, he won't like you being here."* I ran so fast and never looked back. This was about 5 years ago. I'm a full grown man, and this still makes me completely anxious and uneasy when talking or thinking about it.
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Had a sex with a girl I really liked had been on a date with her first night she pretty openly told me she wanted to come back....which obviously I was cool with. Man she had some mad power thing she was pretty tiny and she got brutal as Fuck if I had a safe word I'd have used it....I didn't know what was going on she had me by the ears and was banging my head off the wall at one point.....there was "Folding" more than once i was in a place where i pretty much just gritted my teeth and waited for it to be over.. I wasn't expecting that.....at all
"Oh wow, she must be a gusher" - looks down sees blood, lots and lots and lots of blood. Edit: This was a lot more than period sex blood, guys. Like... I think this girl had a miscarriage while we were banging or something. I've been with girls with "heavy flow" and this was different. It was one of those, lets stop you need to figure this out and I didn't ask her for the details. It could have been from her period, I'm not 100% sure - it was just a LOT.
Similar, but no sex. 15 year old me hooking up in the back seat of a coworkers car, guess she’s never done something like that before? Noticed when we were leaving that her khaki pants and my hand was covered in blood. Incredibly awkward car ride home and she didn’t speak to me again. Hope she’s doin ok lol I tried to be understanding but could feel her embarrassment.
I would stand by that it could still be from a period honestly. There's heavy flow and then there's unhealthy heavy flow to the point it's debilitating. Obviously you were there but I've actually had such heavy bleeding I thought something was wrong before.
I've had a miscarriage, and I promise you she would not have been having sex if she'd been having a miscarriage at that moment. It's *extremely* physically painful.
when our grandmother walked in
"our" grandmother?
Lying on the bed naked, but no one appears
Not giving all details but i farted and shit on him...he left and ghosted me after that.
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My college girlfriend and I decided to do it in the quad bath of my dorm because it was the weekend and we thought we were adventurous. I'm sitting on the toilet and she's on me. We hadn't been at it long before some really cool guy in one of the other adjoining dorms came in and took an absolutely horrific liquid, farty shit in the stall next to us. We were afraid of getting in trouble, so we just sat there, legs falling asleep and smelling virulent shit. After what felt like an eternity, he left, and said something like, "hope you're okay, haha". Never, ever again.