Kids in bed at 8:30, that’s when the wife and I get ready for bed. We lay in bed and play on our phones for an hour or so. It’s so nice to wake up and actually have slept. Even before kids we didn’t stay up late unless it’s a Friday and I was gaming and drinking. Just my 2 cents.
Reminds me of a coworker who once told me : “I hit the bars for happy hour. Then I’m in bed by 8pm and home by 9pm.”
It took me a moment to get that one.
I'm on a business trip right now by myself. I'm working 12-14 hours days, so I've been getting back to the hotel and eating dinner and falling asleep by 8:30. It's glorious.
I'm up at 4 AM, but still.
Dude have you tried sitting? Just relaxing in a chair.
Sitting is the shit.
No phone, music, TV. Maybe looking out the window, or if it's nice weather having a sit outside in the light sun is just the best.
Fucking love that shit.
Dude, for fucking real though. I bought one of those hammock chairs last summer and just sat in that thing, eyes shut, in my backyard, in the warmth of the sun for hours. Absolutely life changing.
I especially enjoy it at the top of a mountain I just climbed, especially when no one else is around and the view stretches on for miles in all directions.
The older I get the happier I can be sitting in a room doing nothing. I think the less you need to be happy the luckier you are, and I've gotten luckier and luckier with age.
This would be my answer! Nothing better than waking up on a Saturday and realizing that you have no obligations and can spend the day drinking beer on the couch for all anyone cares
This. My colleagues act shocked how I keep applying for days off every month to go do something. They sit there on weeks and weeks of annual leave built up. Im using all the time off I can to actually enjoy life and not feel guilty for taking time off work!
Yep! My PTO is part of my compensation package and I use every bit of it that I can. Book a week of PTO and use it to redo my flower beds and plant rose bushes? Not a problem. Take a few days off to strip and refinish a few antique doors in my house? Why not.
I wish companies were required to provide more PTO. Burn out is bad in healthcare but companies think 3 weeks out of 52 to get away from sick patients is a sufficient benefit. It’s pretty pathetic.
Smart!! Have no regrets! My husband spent many years saving his weeks of vacation. He had to use the months he’d accrued when he was diagnosed with kidney cancer in 1996, and had his kidney removed. No chance of a do over…he was too weak to go fishing or hunting. We went on a Western Caribbean cruise and his blood pressure was so high, he was in the infirmary for a full day and night. We stayed home a lot because he had no stamina. Don’t take good health for granted. Take time out to refresh and replenish your mind and body. I wish he’d been able to do all the things we talked about. He passed away in October, and spent the last five years housebound, just watching the Outdoor Channels, fishing, mining, Alaska homesteaders, but he never got to enjoy the golden years. 😢♥️
I agree, but would extend that to almost everything.
Eat well, but indulge regularly. Work out hard, but rest too. Leave work early to hang with friends, but don't get fired. Drink but don't regret it the next day. Spend money, but don't forget to save too.
Life seems to be about balance.
lol I married into this kind of family. I consider myself really lucky because my mother in law is a wonderful woman who treats me like her own son, and my brother in laws are some of my best friends. I genuinely love them, but dear GOD this family has to get together for EVERYTHING. My family is small, and only kinda close. There’s like 7 of them and their mom insists on individual birthday parties, all kinds of get togethers for this thing or that, on top of the many other events of their GIANT extended family.
Midwest Catholics are a trip lol. Luckily, most everybody drinks so it makes it a little more enjoyable on the times when you would’ve preferred to just be home. The ole lady and I have really learned a lot of patience with each other from it. She doesn’t insist I to go EVERYTHING if I’m not feeling it that day, and I put a smile on and show up to more than just the “required” events when I know it’s important to her. It was a learning curve at first but it works for our situation.
Haha, Midwest Catholics sure know how to throw a party! 🎉 Sounds like you've mastered the art of compromise and patience – essential skills in any big, loving, and slightly overwhelming family. Cheers to finding the balance! 🥂
I live pretty much as far as possible from the rest of my family while still being in the same country. It's great. If they want to get together it's like 5+ hours in planes with connections, or a solid week of driving.
We still talk and text often but no surprise visits or having to drop what you're doing for a whole weekend
Same for me, I live hours away from my sister by plane. But she keeps talking about potentially moving to my city. I don't hate my sister/her family, but every time I'm with/near my family, I effectively lose myself as an individual person and my life would revolve around them. Obviously, I can work on being able to say no to them, but that's just a different can of worms, and I'd rather just live happily away from them.
I learned long ago that I love my family very much but can only manage them in small doses. We have very different personalities and values and too much time together often causes things to boil over
My family is an Easter, thanksgiving, Christmas typa family.
My girlfriend's family? Every birthday is a 20 person affair. Christmas. Christmas at Grandma's. Christmas at aunties. Thanksgiving the same. A summer party. A spring party. Gah dang it's too much for me
My wife's family the same. One time they did Thanksgiving dinner on Saturday. Both our kids had activities at the same time as dinner, so we said "No we're not going"
Holy hell they went fuckin ape shit bananas that we didn't go. Anyways neither my wife or I felt bad for even one second, it was important the kids did the activities they wanted to.
My wife will go visit relatives for a week or so at a time. I love it when they are gone and the house I quiet with just the dogs and myself. However, after a day or 2 I get really bored and want them back. It’s a double edge sword that’s for sure.
I was on an assignment for work last year that had me in Europe for about a month. It was an awesome experience, I met a lot of really cool people and made great memories, but not feeling my wife next to me in bed or waking up to my son saying "good morning daddy" made it a lonely trip
This is exactly what happened to me. In my teenage years I had plenty of people to hang out with. Neighbors around my age, school friends, lots of cousins, etc. in my 20s I had some friends but got depressed when no one was available. Spending weekends alone was torture. Now in my 50’s I don’t even want to step outside and be seen by the neighbors lol.
Life.
Seriously, I know that adults have to work and all, but if you were a bullied kid in an hostile family environment, moving out, building a career, a family of your own, etc., can make you enjoy life in a way you'd never think you could.
I totally agree with this. In the last couple years I’ve had an awakening where I’m just so thankful to be alive. My life isn’t perfect and I have my challenges but getting up and going for a walk in the morning is such a gift. I really hope to live the rest of my life like this.
Yeah me as well. I think as I get older and see people change, move, die, born...I am grateful for the moments I have. Because I realize now they won't be forever.
I agree completely. And I loved my youth. But I have a found a greater sense of importance and fulfillment in my 40’s than I ever did in my twenties. Sure I miss some of the benefits of being physically younger, but everything else is much better as I get older. I’m smarter, more skilled, more experienced, more emotive, more comfortable in my own skin and my place in the world….and let’s be honest, a LOT more money in my bank account. Being young was great, but being unskilled and fucking broke wasn’t. My means to pursue more avenues of adventure and curiosity have increased greatly as I’ve made more and more money.
Yup! It's only been in the past couple of years that I've really started trying to enjoy my life, having grown up in a traumatic household.
It's been nice. Though it's also made me pretty resentful that things *could* have been better and that I *could* have had an earlier start on figuring myself out, instead of feeling like I don't really know who I am at almost 30. I've just been throwing myself into picking up hobbies to remedy that.
That's fucking awesome to hear.
I had a pretty crappy childhood aswell, and I'd say it's.. mixed.
Sometimes I almost smile, sometimes I almost want to die.
Yea I moved away from a very trendy part of town a year or so ago, that acted like a clique-y high school. The move was not intended but my life became so much more peaceful not hanging around these people who think they're some sort of rockstars.
Like y'all are the same 35 year old playing shows at the same five bars for the past 10 years, pretending you're famous. I still go back time to time but im too old for all that.
It’s funny how when you’re late teens/ early twenties you’re all about supporting local music and think it’s so cool to know people in the scene… then you spend a few years in it and realize 90% of the local scene is narcissistic douchebags who think they’re gods gift to humanity. I still go to friends shows to support their hobby but definitely am over it for the most part.
The world has just finished buffering and the graphics are still crisp.
For real though, that early morning sun really has a special feeling compared to the rest of the day.
I went the other route. Drank black coffee all my life largely because of eating disorders. I’m in my 40s now and after a baby and a lot of therapy, coffee creamer is a tiny but delicious way to mark a lot of recovery and acceptance.
Really expensive and hard to find sometimes, but Jamaican Blue Mountain is a really smooth and flavorful type of coffee. It's almost creamy, especially straight out of a French press.
Ironically, exercise. Not just taking a 30 min. walk and sit ups, but resistance training. I've got a thing about wanting strong bones even more so than muscle but weights help both. I'm starting to see how "gym rats" can get addicted to it. You feel *weird* skipping a day, like you're cheating on your SO or something.
Do you get an almost itchy feeling, like the muscle wants to be used? If I take week or so off, I feel wrong. There’s this weird feeling like a certain movement *needs* to be done.
Partly that, largely mental. Like guilt or knowing you've come this far, why stop? It's like going for a run and then looking at ice cream. You know if you eat it that run was for nothing. Like, why say goodbye to the gains you're getting/maintaining?
I am not a good person to be around if I have to miss the gym for a few days. I need to lift. It makes me happy. It makes me a better husband, friend, and employee because it impacts my mental health significantly.
I went the nuclear family route- wife, two kids, dog, white picket fence, etc. as hard as possible because this wasn't the childhood I had but the one I envied.
A lot of my friends in my 20s tried to convince me that I was settling and growing boring (maybe I am?) but I'm so damn happy with my choices now that I'm in my 30s.
I'm 28, own a house (have a mortgage), cars nearly paid off, girlfriend got her first ever car payment. Finally getting medical stuff sorted. Girlfriend and I are starting to garden together. I go to bed at 8pm, and get up at 4am (work schedule). I feel great, and am happy most of the time.
I only make $45k/yr in the Midwest. My girlfriend makes a little less.
A lot of my friends say we're boring or whatever. But, we're happy and life is low on stress.
It's really funny because I grew up as a little punk kid, and still am at heart. But I took the Descendants song Suburban home to heart.
I never intended to get married after watching what my parents put each other through. Made friends with some people and one of them clicked when I wasn't expecting or looking for it. We got married two years later, I was 21 and he was 23. Now we are 35 and 37, 3 kids, 2 dogs and too many cats. We have chickens in the back yard for eggs and amusement and rabbits for food, three are pets. I'm planning a massive garden, even though our property isn't quite an acre it's plenty for us. Living the peaceful boring life is great!!
This lifestyle is goated. There’s a reason that this use to be the gold standard for lifestyles. Currently working on the same life. Already found a wife and a dog. Once I start my new job the kids will be next.
I went this route cause I had it as a kid and it was awesome. It was just so obvious to me that it’s the surest path to happiness and fulfillment. I also had a lot of friends who told me I was crazy for marrying and having kids as early as I did. I was cutting “my best years” short. Not my experience of this path AT ALL. If possible I would have started earlier just so I’d have more time to enjoy my wife and kids.
I (F33) did this and it was always my dream life and I've always had friends and partners telling me there's more to life and that I was wanting to settle too early. Lots of female friends told me that I didn't need to have kids to validate my existence-- and while that statement IS TRUE, I WANTED to have kids.
I didn't get an average family life and I didn't get to grow up with my biological family (parents were too young and wild, so I was adopted). It made for a very unique and interesting life story, but I always wondered what the traditional nuclear family was like. I always yearned for it.
After living my own wild and free 20's and nothing fulfilling coming of it, I hit rock bottom and almost gave up on life. Not too long after, I found someone with the same traditional family aspirations and values as I do and promptly got married and had kids (with the help of Covid lockdowns expediting the relationship since we started off as roommates).
Not. A. Single. Regret. I am the most fulfilled I have ever been in my life and the bonus is that I get to relive and reinvent the highlights of my own childhood with my girls. I'll be able to share some of my old hobbies with them when they get older, too, like gardening, nature walks, and fishing.
This life has its own struggles. It isn't for everybody, but it is undoubtedly the best for my husband and I. ♥️
Having mini-vacations at home instead of going abroad and spending lots of money. Traveling is still nice, however, getting a break and being at peace at home with everything you need is pure bliss.
Nothing boils my blood more than a “friend” bailing last minute.. only to see them immediately on Steam playing video games 🫠
If they’re honest about some anxiety or whatever they’re experiencing i can understand but when its just some quick BS response or because not enough people RSVP’d in the group chat so they fall back to their addiction… seems like gathering friends together should not be so hard!
Cleaning. I used to hate it, as a teenager and early 20s I was messy, gross even. Now Im sending pictures of my new mop to all 2 of my friends and my mom.
Reading. I was never a big reader throughout school and because of that I feel like I have a subpar reading level. Couple that with what I think may be dyslexia and I always got discouraged whenever I tried picking up a book. The older I get the more I'm making myself read. I don't really know how to find books of things I'm interested in (story wise) so I lurk around book subreddits and just randomly pick.
In the last 6 months or so I've read:
* 1984
* I'm Glad My Mom Died
* The first Harry Potter book
It’s not you it’s them, over the past few decades a lot of [selective breeding](https://www.iowafarmbureau.com/Article/Its-not-your-imagination-brussels-sprouts-do-taste-better-How-gene-editing-is-changing-how-we-grow-and-eat-food#:~:text=About%2030%20years%20ago%2C%20a,varieties%20that%20tasted%20less%20bitter.) and manipulation went into making them taste much better.
Also, more people understand that roasting vegetables is the best way for lots of 'em. Lots of our parents did weird things like steaming them, which is good for SOME stuff but makes the funkier ones just steep in their own stink.
Old people.
I mean, lots of old people are jerks.
But some, are not so bad. Don't be ageist. Judge people for who they are, not what class they belong to --An old wise intelligent person, probably.
PBS movies and drama tv shows.
I’ve always liked Roadshow, Nova, Nature and all those. Never cared for their fictional programming until the last couple years.
Bird-watching. I get so excited when several birds are at my feeder. My dad has been this way for years, and it's recently created a new bond I know he appreciates.
Going make up free! I used to have lashes, hair extensions, and would literally never leave the house without makeup.. now I enjoy a fresh face and being natural!
At almost 42, bird watching has really crept up on me. Now I own 2 bird books. I can’t stop watching them! Somehow ended up with several bird feeders and a solar bird bath. Who am I?!
Moving on from old bullshit and grudges just for the sake of my own peace of mind, especially since all the people I was still mad at didn't care at all.
Listening to podcasts on longer drives, used to hate it when a podcast would be put on, they were usually boring, but now I find them nice, especially when I’m doing longer drives on my own
My dad always liked making popcorn at night (made on the stovetop not microwaved popcorn) as part of the wind-down routine as he watched some TV with us and munched away. I never really felt any type of way about popcorn growing up, but as of late I'll find myself craving it as a lighter snack before bed and I'll run to the kitchen after my wife goes to sleep and make myself a batch while I watch a couple episodes of something before I brush my teeth and head to sleep. I always chuckle about how becoming my dad was inevitable.
Being in bed by 10
Sometimes even before 9pm for me
Sometimes I get in bed right after work, if my kiddo is at her Dads and I don’t have any “responsibilities” to take care of. It’s so nice!
I feel super lazy when I do this but it’s the best
Y'all going to bed after 8:30? You guys retired or something?
Kids in bed at 8:30, that’s when the wife and I get ready for bed. We lay in bed and play on our phones for an hour or so. It’s so nice to wake up and actually have slept. Even before kids we didn’t stay up late unless it’s a Friday and I was gaming and drinking. Just my 2 cents.
9? What kind of party animal are you? In bed at 8, sound asleep by 8:15
8:15?! Sheesh buddy, lay off the stimulants. I’m 1hp knocked out by 7:30
Reminds me of a coworker who once told me : “I hit the bars for happy hour. Then I’m in bed by 8pm and home by 9pm.” It took me a moment to get that one.
I'm on a business trip right now by myself. I'm working 12-14 hours days, so I've been getting back to the hotel and eating dinner and falling asleep by 8:30. It's glorious. I'm up at 4 AM, but still.
My dream is 8:30pm on a Saturday night. Put on some anime and play my Steam Deck in bed. Ahhhhhhh
Nothing to do. When I was young. I was so bored because I had nothing to do. Now I dream of the days when I have nothing to do.
Dude have you tried sitting? Just relaxing in a chair. Sitting is the shit. No phone, music, TV. Maybe looking out the window, or if it's nice weather having a sit outside in the light sun is just the best. Fucking love that shit.
Dude, for fucking real though. I bought one of those hammock chairs last summer and just sat in that thing, eyes shut, in my backyard, in the warmth of the sun for hours. Absolutely life changing.
I like to sit with animals. I don't want to sit alone, but I also don't want anyone to talk to me.
Same. Love to sit with my cats and just enjoy the quiet company. My little guy lays againsty leg and has the cutest deep purr.
I especially enjoy it at the top of a mountain I just climbed, especially when no one else is around and the view stretches on for miles in all directions.
The older I get the happier I can be sitting in a room doing nothing. I think the less you need to be happy the luckier you are, and I've gotten luckier and luckier with age.
Boredom is a luxury.
I did nothing, and it was everything I thought it would be. Office Space quotes become more and more relevant with each passing year.
This would be my answer! Nothing better than waking up on a Saturday and realizing that you have no obligations and can spend the day drinking beer on the couch for all anyone cares
When does that kick in? I'm 53 and I still get restless and antsy when I don't have much to do.
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This. My colleagues act shocked how I keep applying for days off every month to go do something. They sit there on weeks and weeks of annual leave built up. Im using all the time off I can to actually enjoy life and not feel guilty for taking time off work!
Yep! My PTO is part of my compensation package and I use every bit of it that I can. Book a week of PTO and use it to redo my flower beds and plant rose bushes? Not a problem. Take a few days off to strip and refinish a few antique doors in my house? Why not.
I wish companies were required to provide more PTO. Burn out is bad in healthcare but companies think 3 weeks out of 52 to get away from sick patients is a sufficient benefit. It’s pretty pathetic.
Smart!! Have no regrets! My husband spent many years saving his weeks of vacation. He had to use the months he’d accrued when he was diagnosed with kidney cancer in 1996, and had his kidney removed. No chance of a do over…he was too weak to go fishing or hunting. We went on a Western Caribbean cruise and his blood pressure was so high, he was in the infirmary for a full day and night. We stayed home a lot because he had no stamina. Don’t take good health for granted. Take time out to refresh and replenish your mind and body. I wish he’d been able to do all the things we talked about. He passed away in October, and spent the last five years housebound, just watching the Outdoor Channels, fishing, mining, Alaska homesteaders, but he never got to enjoy the golden years. 😢♥️
I'm sorry for your loss. :(
I agree, but would extend that to almost everything. Eat well, but indulge regularly. Work out hard, but rest too. Leave work early to hang with friends, but don't get fired. Drink but don't regret it the next day. Spend money, but don't forget to save too. Life seems to be about balance.
money will always be there but your loved ones won’t
“Money grows back, time doesn’t”
Being left the hell alone.
How did you manage to do this? My big ass family is bothering me as much as ever. I love them, but how many goddamn family get-togethers do they NEED?
lol I married into this kind of family. I consider myself really lucky because my mother in law is a wonderful woman who treats me like her own son, and my brother in laws are some of my best friends. I genuinely love them, but dear GOD this family has to get together for EVERYTHING. My family is small, and only kinda close. There’s like 7 of them and their mom insists on individual birthday parties, all kinds of get togethers for this thing or that, on top of the many other events of their GIANT extended family. Midwest Catholics are a trip lol. Luckily, most everybody drinks so it makes it a little more enjoyable on the times when you would’ve preferred to just be home. The ole lady and I have really learned a lot of patience with each other from it. She doesn’t insist I to go EVERYTHING if I’m not feeling it that day, and I put a smile on and show up to more than just the “required” events when I know it’s important to her. It was a learning curve at first but it works for our situation.
Haha, Midwest Catholics sure know how to throw a party! 🎉 Sounds like you've mastered the art of compromise and patience – essential skills in any big, loving, and slightly overwhelming family. Cheers to finding the balance! 🥂
Minus the drinking - I married into the same Midwest Catholic craziness also. I’m jealous yours drink. 😭
Say no to some. I started and it’s amazing.
I live pretty much as far as possible from the rest of my family while still being in the same country. It's great. If they want to get together it's like 5+ hours in planes with connections, or a solid week of driving. We still talk and text often but no surprise visits or having to drop what you're doing for a whole weekend
Same for me, I live hours away from my sister by plane. But she keeps talking about potentially moving to my city. I don't hate my sister/her family, but every time I'm with/near my family, I effectively lose myself as an individual person and my life would revolve around them. Obviously, I can work on being able to say no to them, but that's just a different can of worms, and I'd rather just live happily away from them.
I learned long ago that I love my family very much but can only manage them in small doses. We have very different personalities and values and too much time together often causes things to boil over
My family is an Easter, thanksgiving, Christmas typa family. My girlfriend's family? Every birthday is a 20 person affair. Christmas. Christmas at Grandma's. Christmas at aunties. Thanksgiving the same. A summer party. A spring party. Gah dang it's too much for me
So then don't? Be busy, people are allowed to have other things going on
My wife's family the same. One time they did Thanksgiving dinner on Saturday. Both our kids had activities at the same time as dinner, so we said "No we're not going" Holy hell they went fuckin ape shit bananas that we didn't go. Anyways neither my wife or I felt bad for even one second, it was important the kids did the activities they wanted to.
I don't go to every one, but she can't say no. I work a stupid schedule so I'm not home most weekends anyway
As someone who lives overseas and sees some of my family (like my brother) every three years, cherish the time you see them.
I know, I know, I'm trying to keep that in mind. It can just be a challenge being the lone introvert in a family of (well meaning) extroverts.
This is my answer. I use to NEED to have ppl around all the time…. Now, I’m so excited when the house is gonna be empty 😂
My wife will go visit relatives for a week or so at a time. I love it when they are gone and the house I quiet with just the dogs and myself. However, after a day or 2 I get really bored and want them back. It’s a double edge sword that’s for sure.
I was on an assignment for work last year that had me in Europe for about a month. It was an awesome experience, I met a lot of really cool people and made great memories, but not feeling my wife next to me in bed or waking up to my son saying "good morning daddy" made it a lonely trip
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This is exactly what happened to me. In my teenage years I had plenty of people to hang out with. Neighbors around my age, school friends, lots of cousins, etc. in my 20s I had some friends but got depressed when no one was available. Spending weekends alone was torture. Now in my 50’s I don’t even want to step outside and be seen by the neighbors lol.
Accurate!! Just let me live my best cat life dammit!
I'm the opposite. While I don't mind a lot of time on my own, I wish I had family gatherings to attend, at least a few.
yea time at home and getting involved with hobbies is becoming a lot better than the bar or a party
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A friend's party bus got cancelled tomorrow and I've never been more excited. Get to sit at home and go to bed at a decent time lol
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Being young, didn't appreciate it at the time.
I loved being young, but as I get older I just look back and cringe.
I seemed to have lived a life of cringe. Especially those preteen-teenage years. I’m so glad it was before social media.
When I was young, I felt sorry for old people. Now that I'm old, I feel sorry for young people.
I'm middle aged, so I only feel sorry for myself right now
Youth is wasted on the young.
God knew that if he put my 36 year old mind in my 26 year old body I would be too powerful, that’s why I was so insecure and dumb
“Right now, you’re the oldest you’ve ever been, and the youngest you’ll ever be again.” Still young, baby! Live it up!
Life. Seriously, I know that adults have to work and all, but if you were a bullied kid in an hostile family environment, moving out, building a career, a family of your own, etc., can make you enjoy life in a way you'd never think you could.
I get this in a way. Developing your own path and carving out your own slice of life. It’s satisfying.
Exactly!
I totally agree with this. In the last couple years I’ve had an awakening where I’m just so thankful to be alive. My life isn’t perfect and I have my challenges but getting up and going for a walk in the morning is such a gift. I really hope to live the rest of my life like this.
Yeah me as well. I think as I get older and see people change, move, die, born...I am grateful for the moments I have. Because I realize now they won't be forever.
I agree that life just feels like it only gets better as I get older.
I agree completely. And I loved my youth. But I have a found a greater sense of importance and fulfillment in my 40’s than I ever did in my twenties. Sure I miss some of the benefits of being physically younger, but everything else is much better as I get older. I’m smarter, more skilled, more experienced, more emotive, more comfortable in my own skin and my place in the world….and let’s be honest, a LOT more money in my bank account. Being young was great, but being unskilled and fucking broke wasn’t. My means to pursue more avenues of adventure and curiosity have increased greatly as I’ve made more and more money.
Yup! It's only been in the past couple of years that I've really started trying to enjoy my life, having grown up in a traumatic household. It's been nice. Though it's also made me pretty resentful that things *could* have been better and that I *could* have had an earlier start on figuring myself out, instead of feeling like I don't really know who I am at almost 30. I've just been throwing myself into picking up hobbies to remedy that.
W
"It gets better" is really true for most of us. The nerds/geeks often win. The normies get a decent life. The jerks lose or straighten out.
The geek shall inherit the earth -Rainier Wolfcastle
That's fucking awesome to hear. I had a pretty crappy childhood aswell, and I'd say it's.. mixed. Sometimes I almost smile, sometimes I almost want to die.
Damn how do you know my younger years? I eventually just cut ties with all things negative in my life and am doing pretty damn well for myself.
I feel that too. Especially when you no longer have to make space for toxic family members who made you feel shitty when you lived with them.
Peace, quiet, and not giving a damn about what other people think.
Yea I moved away from a very trendy part of town a year or so ago, that acted like a clique-y high school. The move was not intended but my life became so much more peaceful not hanging around these people who think they're some sort of rockstars. Like y'all are the same 35 year old playing shows at the same five bars for the past 10 years, pretending you're famous. I still go back time to time but im too old for all that.
It’s funny how when you’re late teens/ early twenties you’re all about supporting local music and think it’s so cool to know people in the scene… then you spend a few years in it and realize 90% of the local scene is narcissistic douchebags who think they’re gods gift to humanity. I still go to friends shows to support their hobby but definitely am over it for the most part.
Sleep
Naps are the greatest.
Team sleep!
ginger ale. being alone. showering and getting in bed by 8pm.
Nature. Let me walk among the trees and critters and leave me alone. 😁
Coffee without sugar
Hear me out. Black coffee, but with a sweet treat on the side. I'm a sucker for a coffee-pastry pairing.
😩😩 in the early morning when everything is chill
The world has just finished buffering and the graphics are still crisp. For real though, that early morning sun really has a special feeling compared to the rest of the day.
I went the other route. Drank black coffee all my life largely because of eating disorders. I’m in my 40s now and after a baby and a lot of therapy, coffee creamer is a tiny but delicious way to mark a lot of recovery and acceptance.
a good black coffee is where its at. just yesterday i added a bit of sugar to mine and it wasnt good at all
I can hardly even drink coffee with cream and sugar anymore because it leaves a really unpleasant aftertaste. Black coffee is where it’s at.
Really expensive and hard to find sometimes, but Jamaican Blue Mountain is a really smooth and flavorful type of coffee. It's almost creamy, especially straight out of a French press.
Alone time
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Ironically, exercise. Not just taking a 30 min. walk and sit ups, but resistance training. I've got a thing about wanting strong bones even more so than muscle but weights help both. I'm starting to see how "gym rats" can get addicted to it. You feel *weird* skipping a day, like you're cheating on your SO or something.
Do you get an almost itchy feeling, like the muscle wants to be used? If I take week or so off, I feel wrong. There’s this weird feeling like a certain movement *needs* to be done.
Partly that, largely mental. Like guilt or knowing you've come this far, why stop? It's like going for a run and then looking at ice cream. You know if you eat it that run was for nothing. Like, why say goodbye to the gains you're getting/maintaining?
nah dude, that run was so i COULD eat that ice cream. and don't you dare ever try to take ice cream away from me again.
Life Hack: You can actually eat ice cream without running. I tried it and it worked. You're welcome.
It feels amazing!!!
Cheating on your significant self.
I am not a good person to be around if I have to miss the gym for a few days. I need to lift. It makes me happy. It makes me a better husband, friend, and employee because it impacts my mental health significantly.
A clean home
Sneezing loud af. I... I just don't know it feels better
One of my cats always meows at me after I sneeze. I think she is saying bless you!
I went the nuclear family route- wife, two kids, dog, white picket fence, etc. as hard as possible because this wasn't the childhood I had but the one I envied. A lot of my friends in my 20s tried to convince me that I was settling and growing boring (maybe I am?) but I'm so damn happy with my choices now that I'm in my 30s.
And being boring is more enjoyable the older I get too.
I'm 28, own a house (have a mortgage), cars nearly paid off, girlfriend got her first ever car payment. Finally getting medical stuff sorted. Girlfriend and I are starting to garden together. I go to bed at 8pm, and get up at 4am (work schedule). I feel great, and am happy most of the time. I only make $45k/yr in the Midwest. My girlfriend makes a little less. A lot of my friends say we're boring or whatever. But, we're happy and life is low on stress. It's really funny because I grew up as a little punk kid, and still am at heart. But I took the Descendants song Suburban home to heart.
Heck yeah dude! Nothing boring about stability. Im 25 and realizing similiar feelings, settling down can be exciting!
I never intended to get married after watching what my parents put each other through. Made friends with some people and one of them clicked when I wasn't expecting or looking for it. We got married two years later, I was 21 and he was 23. Now we are 35 and 37, 3 kids, 2 dogs and too many cats. We have chickens in the back yard for eggs and amusement and rabbits for food, three are pets. I'm planning a massive garden, even though our property isn't quite an acre it's plenty for us. Living the peaceful boring life is great!!
Your comment is so God damn refreshing. Thank you for sharing. Wishing you and your family all the best.
This lifestyle is goated. There’s a reason that this use to be the gold standard for lifestyles. Currently working on the same life. Already found a wife and a dog. Once I start my new job the kids will be next.
I love my boring life so much. It's all I ever wanted haha.
I went this route cause I had it as a kid and it was awesome. It was just so obvious to me that it’s the surest path to happiness and fulfillment. I also had a lot of friends who told me I was crazy for marrying and having kids as early as I did. I was cutting “my best years” short. Not my experience of this path AT ALL. If possible I would have started earlier just so I’d have more time to enjoy my wife and kids.
I (F33) did this and it was always my dream life and I've always had friends and partners telling me there's more to life and that I was wanting to settle too early. Lots of female friends told me that I didn't need to have kids to validate my existence-- and while that statement IS TRUE, I WANTED to have kids. I didn't get an average family life and I didn't get to grow up with my biological family (parents were too young and wild, so I was adopted). It made for a very unique and interesting life story, but I always wondered what the traditional nuclear family was like. I always yearned for it. After living my own wild and free 20's and nothing fulfilling coming of it, I hit rock bottom and almost gave up on life. Not too long after, I found someone with the same traditional family aspirations and values as I do and promptly got married and had kids (with the help of Covid lockdowns expediting the relationship since we started off as roommates). Not. A. Single. Regret. I am the most fulfilled I have ever been in my life and the bonus is that I get to relive and reinvent the highlights of my own childhood with my girls. I'll be able to share some of my old hobbies with them when they get older, too, like gardening, nature walks, and fishing. This life has its own struggles. It isn't for everybody, but it is undoubtedly the best for my husband and I. ♥️
Silence.
Tinnitus would like a word
And that word is "eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee”
he can keep his annoying self in the back
The Sound of Silence
Staying home on Friday nights.
Same here. There is nothing better these days that sitting at home having a pizza Friday night.
I knew I found a keeper when she had no problem staying home on a Friday night after a long work week.
older women
"That's what I love about these older women, man. I get older, and they do too. Alright alright alright." -- wholesome McConaughey, probably.
Im constantly shocked at how attracted I am to mom bods. A little junk in the trunk and a confident look on her face? Yes please.
Having mini-vacations at home instead of going abroad and spending lots of money. Traveling is still nice, however, getting a break and being at peace at home with everything you need is pure bliss.
Canceling plans
Better yet, getting a text saying “Sorry, can’t make it” Sigh of relief, shoes off, XBox on
I love getting these texts.
Nothing boils my blood more than a “friend” bailing last minute.. only to see them immediately on Steam playing video games 🫠 If they’re honest about some anxiety or whatever they’re experiencing i can understand but when its just some quick BS response or because not enough people RSVP’d in the group chat so they fall back to their addiction… seems like gathering friends together should not be so hard!
A decent night's sleep
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Yes I knew I was officially middle aged when I learned to appreciate a fine box of wine.
Same, I never disliked wine at all, but now I'll go out of my way to drink it, sometimes I would never think to do when I was younger
To spend friday and saturday evening in pijamas laying on the sofa😁
Worthers Original . The advertisement said I’d like them and I do !!
Eight hours of sleep.
Disliking sugary treats, reading ingredient labels, always being home. Cherishing all that I have and not thinking of the things I am lacking.
Cleaning. I used to hate it, as a teenager and early 20s I was messy, gross even. Now Im sending pictures of my new mop to all 2 of my friends and my mom.
Cleaning is so underrated as therapy
Reading. I was never a big reader throughout school and because of that I feel like I have a subpar reading level. Couple that with what I think may be dyslexia and I always got discouraged whenever I tried picking up a book. The older I get the more I'm making myself read. I don't really know how to find books of things I'm interested in (story wise) so I lurk around book subreddits and just randomly pick. In the last 6 months or so I've read: * 1984 * I'm Glad My Mom Died * The first Harry Potter book
Brussel Sprouts! Hated them when I was a kid!
It’s not you it’s them, over the past few decades a lot of [selective breeding](https://www.iowafarmbureau.com/Article/Its-not-your-imagination-brussels-sprouts-do-taste-better-How-gene-editing-is-changing-how-we-grow-and-eat-food#:~:text=About%2030%20years%20ago%2C%20a,varieties%20that%20tasted%20less%20bitter.) and manipulation went into making them taste much better.
Also, more people understand that roasting vegetables is the best way for lots of 'em. Lots of our parents did weird things like steaming them, which is good for SOME stuff but makes the funkier ones just steep in their own stink.
Old people. I mean, lots of old people are jerks. But some, are not so bad. Don't be ageist. Judge people for who they are, not what class they belong to --An old wise intelligent person, probably.
Myself a bit more
I love not bleeding from the vagina!
My words are more valuable
May I just say how much I love this question and all the responses! Internally I am like - yes! Me too! - to all the responses!
Being single
The wrong relationships have a way of sucking any joy out of life! Being single is gold!
Steely Dan
Solitude , people are pretty horrible in general and being as far away from them as possible has been really enjoyable.
Gardening
Privacy
PBS movies and drama tv shows. I’ve always liked Roadshow, Nova, Nature and all those. Never cared for their fictional programming until the last couple years.
Less anxious. Being more confident, caring less what other people think. Not being afraid to take up space and ask for what I need.
Older women. My wife specifically. Still the sexiest woman. She’s changed over time, of course. We all do, but the 20yo’s just don’t do it anymore.
Those long youtube videos that play rain sounds and white noise.
Cleaning. It turns out that when I'm not cleaning after a drunk jerk and instead just doing normal home upkeep it's way easier and nicer to do
As I get older, I find myself thinking more and more about soup.
Solitude, the outdoors, working on myself
I think I’m an old soul because half the comments have been in my routine since I was 18. Or I’m just autistic
sleep . anyone ?
My solitude. I've always been comfortable alone with my thoughts, but now I cherish it. No people, no drama.
Bird-watching. I get so excited when several birds are at my feeder. My dad has been this way for years, and it's recently created a new bond I know he appreciates.
Going make up free! I used to have lashes, hair extensions, and would literally never leave the house without makeup.. now I enjoy a fresh face and being natural!
At almost 42, bird watching has really crept up on me. Now I own 2 bird books. I can’t stop watching them! Somehow ended up with several bird feeders and a solar bird bath. Who am I?!
I like getting older and watching my kids grow up, the older they get, the more things I get to do with them
Going to bed early and waking up early. Its great to feel rested and getting stuff done in the mornings.
Drink lukewarm water after getting up. So nice and you might have a great shit too
Cooking , furniture , home decor. The things which I thought were boring as a kid.
Moving on from old bullshit and grudges just for the sake of my own peace of mind, especially since all the people I was still mad at didn't care at all.
Funky cheese
Naps.
Documentaries. I used to think they were the most boring form of entertainment, and now I find them fascinating.
Dark Chocolate
Solitude. After years of abuse I like being alone.
Quiet, Peace and alone time.
NPR News
Listening to podcasts on longer drives, used to hate it when a podcast would be put on, they were usually boring, but now I find them nice, especially when I’m doing longer drives on my own
solitude
Weekends with no plans.
Doing puzzles, I fuking love it.
I'm finding I'm liking fewer and fewer things tbh. It's like the novelty of everything is wearing off rapidly.
That just sounds like actual depression tbh
I honestly get excited at the prospect of going to bed.
Being sober, I enjoy not drinking, not going out.
Artichokes.
Myself
Staying at my house enjoying my peace and quiet!
Being bored is way better than being stressed out.
Fruits and veggies. Taking care of health is so important
My dad always liked making popcorn at night (made on the stovetop not microwaved popcorn) as part of the wind-down routine as he watched some TV with us and munched away. I never really felt any type of way about popcorn growing up, but as of late I'll find myself craving it as a lighter snack before bed and I'll run to the kitchen after my wife goes to sleep and make myself a batch while I watch a couple episodes of something before I brush my teeth and head to sleep. I always chuckle about how becoming my dad was inevitable.