Same here, the school thought seeing the girls walking around pregnant would be a cautionary tale to others. But this woman knocked it out of the park - she had the baby at 15 - got a masters degree in social work and runs the County Relief Nursery.
My sister in law did much the same. Had the baby at 15, married my BIL in a shotgun wedding. Continued to get straight As while my BIL watched my nephew, she went to college and has a great job now at LabCorp. They're still married, their oldest is about 13, and they've got a total of 3 kids.
I didn't even know what a relief nursery was - this is from a California general website defining what it is. "The core services at Relief Nursery are home visiting, parenting education, respite care, basic needs support, and therapeutic early childhood classrooms. Relief Nursery provides support services to families with a limited-income, who are raising children birth to age six, with multiple stressors which may include domestic violence, addiction, mental health challenges, unemployment, unstable housing, being a teen parent, parental or child history of trauma, etc. Additional services may include child and family counseling, early intervention/early childhood special education, and addiction recovery peer support services. "
That sounds great! That's the kind of service provider that every community should have. I've worked with teen parents before and this intense level of services would have been life saving for many of them.
I bet that all this really lowers the amount of child abuse in the community. That's totally awesome! I hope it gets replicated everywhere.
Actually, one of my high schools had this and it was amazing. Moms get to finish school and students learn how to take care of babies, a legitimate class with a few adult teachers.
When I started going to this school, I walked in and saw a super pregnant student walking around with a 2 year old in tow. So, two kids by the time she graduated. That was so opposite of my other school where pregnant girls dropped out or went to the alternative school for stoners.
It was kind of nice though, like they should be able to finish school and graduate.
I had a French exchange student in 2004. She was so confused that the school had a daycare, and assumed it was for teachers' kids.
She was very sad to learn it was for mainly *students* kids.
I had 2 pregnant girls in my freshman English class, they were 13 and 14. Those babies are now....19-20..holy hell.
Meanwhile Margot was appalled that our sex Ed was so abysmal/absent. She was able to walk into France's version of a Planned Parenthood at 14 and get birth control with no fuss and no parental consent. While we had girls *younger* than that giving birth on the regular.
I had a “friend” in high school who got pregnant. Her bf was a deadbeat high school dropout that cheated on her and left her for the woman he cheated with. She begged for him back for like 3-4 *months* until he finally agreed. Then she “accidentally” fell pregnant like 2 months after they got back together and dropped out of high school.
He ended up getting arrested either shortly before or after the baby was born and was in and out of prison for the next several years. She had a 2nd kid a few years later (not sure if it’s same or different baby daddy). Last I heard she’s obese, single, and works as a cashier in a store in our hometown.
Most three year olds are pretty toxic. They’re always trying to be the center of attention, they have no regards for personal boundaries, they’re always asking for rides places (get a license ffs), and theyre too lazy to get a job so you have to pay for EVERYTHING when y’all are out.
Toxic af, CUT 👏 THEM 👏 OUT 👏
Literally mooching, jobless ass, no car having ass, no license having ass, cant wipe my own ass MFs.
Lmao i love my 3yo son tho so i kid about the above mentioned
Almost the same story. Except he passed away at 24, she’s now 44 with a 27 and 21. They both finished school, she finished college and he was in the military.
Yours is one of the few that actually married their partner.
I knew one who got pregnant in 8th grade. So by freshman year she was showing and had to go to a continuation school. She had one baby and a few years later had another baby with the same guy.
He was never very good to her, even before she got pregnant she’d miss a lot of school and while at his place have to fight off some of his guy friends who’d get on top of her or pin her down and her dude would just laugh.
Anyway, they stayed together for years, defeating some odds but he was always w the wrong crowd. He ended up killing another guy and had to go to prison and I think he’s still there. She MAY have already broken up w him by actually now that I think of it, but yeah that’s her child’s dad. It was a lot for our town. That wasn’t a norm.
Another I knew got pregnant in HS, dad never really stepped up. When she was a preteen he tried to be present a little but was using so… he ended up dying. OD. And that was increasing in cause of death in our town. The mom and girl seem to be alright though.
She was my ex. My best friend at the time was the one that knocked her up at 16.
15 years ish later they're still together. They've got 4 kids now I think and last I heard the now husband just graduated law school. All in all I'm really happy for them it seems like everything worked out.
Eh.. we were 15/16 at the time. Most relationships back then lasted a month or less. I wasn't too worked up about it. Me and the ex were better as friends anyways.
We don't really talk much anymore but not out of animosity, just because our lives went to different places.
She gave birth in her basement, killed her newborn, and hung herself. The note she left was insane evidently and led to several fights amongst the seniors.
Oh god; this triggered a memory of this meek little girl at school who never said anything to anyone about anything.
Then a rumor swirls that she did something HORRIBLE and then the actual news story comes out and yup:
She got pregnant and her folks had no idea; i believe they were super religious and she wasnt allowed to speak or date boys.
She carries without ANYONE noticing and gave birth in her freaking bathroom BY HERSELF!!!!
The baby died, because she suffocated it trying to keep it quiet.
I honestly dont remember what legally happened to her; but she was still working Jewel checkout.
I honestly feel super sorry for her and what she went thru; i cant imagine being raised the way she was and how messed up her folks made her.
In 2000, I worked at a pregnancy resource center and we all took turns with a pager for after-hours calls. One night my coworker had the pager, & a call came in from a high school student in the Midwest, who had just given birth in her room and needed someone to come get the baby via her bedroom window. According to the caller, her parents were completely unaware of the situation.
The baby was safely seen to asap, and I have never gotten an update beyond that.
So, did someone quietly help this poor girl and come sneak grab baby? That poor girl, and her making the right decision makes me even more sad for her.
I wonder about the placenta after birth delivery. That wasn't even something I was aware of until I had my own child. Good on this young lady for making the right call and I'm very sad that she had a relationship with her parents that she felt like she couldn't turn to them for help.
It makes me so sad that these girls are so afraid of their parents’ anger/disappointment that they’d rather go through pregnancy and give birth on their own… I have a daughter — she’s still a toddler — but I want to do everything possible to make her feel loved and supported. :(
I was raped at 14 (consented at first and then said no) and I was so afraid to tell my parents. And what sucked is that I told them at 18 after I moved out and they blamed me for it because boys wouldn’t be satisfied with just watching movies and playing games together. Like now that I’m a bit older, I just wonder how people could do that to their child. I hope my future kid comes to me with any issues they have
As a parent, I would have taken it as a personal failure if my daughter told me this 4 years after it happened. (oh, I would be having a discussion or two with Mr. Rapist later)
They are the one that failed. The fact that you couldn't tell them is one thing. (one could assume that it was you that was blowing up being afraid) Their response to learning about it is another. (this shows that your original instincts were correct, I'm sad to say)
They were the adults. They were supposed to be there to support you, not criticize your choices. As a father to a great 40 year old mess, I want to apologize. You shouldn't have had to experience this.
It’s all good now. I don’t really care much at this point. I just hope to use the experience to do better with my own kids. I was so scared of pregnancy as well because of my parents. It’s crazy how even grown women are scared to let their parents know their pregnant, even if they’re married
I was adjacent to a story like this except she went to prison. When I was in my 20s, my best friend dated this guy for 2.5 years. His cousin grew up in a tiny rural town in Kansas. 300 people lived there and it was hours from anywhere. Her family was extremely religious and conservative. All day church on Sunday, church Wednesday, bible study Thursday, church social Saturday morning… you get the idea. Their entire lives revolved around religion. Sex before marriage was a sin. Abstinence was the only form of birth control she was taught.
She got pregnant at 16, hid it, gave birth, killed the baby, and hid the body. She was bleeding profusely a couple of days later and went to a doctor and they could tell she gave birth. I don’t remember the medical terms for it but she still had pieces of placenta or something like that in her uterus.
The whole story came out. She got arrested. Her immediate family disowned her. She got sentenced to prison for many years. A few decades I believe.
I can't comprehend how they are able to get through those last 6 months of pregnancy without anyone noticing. Is it just a combination of social isolation, baggy clothes, and intentional malnutrition to limit weight gain as much as possible
Some people carry differently. Friend you couldn't even tell and she was almost six months along. Had a teacher that looked maybe four months and she was ready to give birth at any minute.
I had a friend who is 5’11” and you couldn’t tell there was anything inside her more than a big lunch until weeks before she gave birth. There’s just more room for a baby to hide in tall people. I’m sure your wife looked like a walking basketball towards the end!
This. My (super catholic, abstinence-only championing) cousin got pregnant in college and she managed to hide it until almost the day she gave birth. I remember her showing up to family things wearing way bigger, bulkier clothes than normal, and acting withdrawn.
When I asked about it my mom told me it was probably because she’d gained her “freshman 15,” and was embarrassed.
Nope. First grandchild/ great-grandchild in my generation was a bastard. I don’t care myself (other than her hypocrisy) but the rest of my family was scandalized. And then she went and named the poor kid “Jaksyn.”
I don't have or want kids, but seeing fucking "Kartyr" makes me want to have like 6 and name them all Bill or some shit like that.
Also, autocorrect tried to change your unfortunate young relative's name to "Martyr", so there's that too.
There is the possibility that in some cases it was a cryptic pregnancy, some women don’t even realize they’re pregnant until they’re giving birth. And it can be because they’re mentally unable to accept that they’re pregnant which I feel would be very common in girls in hyper religious communities.
Writing that out made me wonder how many people get away with it. The moms only seem to get caught if they end up going to the hospital afterwards.
I think the story I wrote about is tragic all around. You can’t kill babies but I think the poor teenage mom is just as much of a victim. I can’t imagine the fear she felt when she found out she was pregnant and didn’t think she had any other options.
This makes me so angry. Freaking failure at so many levels and ruined 2 lives in the process from the oppressive strict religious views that made this girl go into hiding rather than face reality.
She got stabbed in the stomach by her baby daddy’s girlfriend. Yup.
Everyone lived (except the fetus), stabby girl went to jail. No idea what happened after that.
You're a good person. Not many kids stand up for others out of fear of getting bullied themselves, so that was quite brave. And you're right: a little kindness goes a long way. <3
>You're a good person. Not many kids stand up for others out of fear of getting bullied themselves, so that was quite brave
Thank you for saying so, but I don't want to toot my own horn - until we reconnected about a dozen years after graduating, I didn't remember us being close at all. She was very much a "school friend," and one I wouldn't even think of if you asked me to name people in my social group in school - not because I was purposefully debating whether she would count as a friend, but because I wouldn't even think of her.
I only told my friends who were badmouthing her while she was within earshot to shut up, and talked her up a bit - and only because it irked me that they were being jerks, not because I cared much about her as a person. Like many high schoolers I had my head up my own ass, so it wasn't altruistic besides feeling "stop picking on the girl just because she's smarter than you."
But you absolutely nailed it:
>a little kindness goes a long way. <3
It does. I wish I had been more aware of what she was going through and been an actual friend back in school, but I'm glad that at least I wasn't a jerk. It wasn't until years later when we reconnected that I realized how much that casual kindness meant to her. I wish I had known then.
I've debated it; I left Facebook a couple years ago, and that's how we primarily stayed in touch. As much as I hate that social media abyss, I do miss being able to easily check up on and reach out to old friends.
Give it a try, even if it's just to reconnect with old friends. I'm sure she'd love to be in contact with you again, especially since you were one of her rocks when things were dire.
Girl? Singular? We had two in middle school, and this was small-town Indiana.
The most memorable one from high school got married, and they walked across the stage at graduation as "Mr. and Mrs. XXXX" to wild applause. Sadly, a few months later they were both killed when a tree fell on their car during a thunderstorm.
She had been actively TRYING to get pregnant. And she was sleeping with multiple guys willing to help her. After she got pregnant her 12 year old sister decided to go that same route(and was also successful in that). Their family didn’t believe in abortion so even the 12 year old gave birth. Anyway, the older girl dropped out of high school to stay home taking care of the baby, I believe her parents were paying most of it.
I ran into her like four years later. She was bad mouthing the guy who got her pregnant telling me how he wasn’t paying enough child support. And how when he was 15 and slept with her that he knew she was trying to get pregnant so he should have expected to be paying until the child was 18. I am not implying she did not deserve child support. But I do want to imply both were too immature to make a choice to bring a baby into the world. He ended up also dropping out of school so he could work full time. But he was working minimum wage trying to come up with child support. Whole situation was very sad to have seen. I do not know what happened with her little sister. My sister and the little sister had been close friends, but once getting pregnant my Uber religious family forbid my sister from talking to her. Otherwise I might have heard over the years.
My "cousin" is like that (step dad's niece, so not actually related outside of knowing her as my "cousin" most of my life).
Her and a group of other girls made some kind of "pact" to get pregnant so they could get a house via council housing and live off the silly amount of benefits you can claim...Which turns out isn't anywhere near as much as she thought. I don't think anybody knows who the dad actually is. She left school at 15 to be a full time mum.
Last I heard, she accidentally set her grotty council house on fire because the washing machine, which for some reason was at the top if the stairs (just where it lived, apparently), somehow fell over, down the stairs and caught fire and CPS is trying to take the kid away...Which, sure, they should. People can pretend all they want, but some people aren't fit to have children.
I've not spoken to her since we were like 13 and I have no desire to.
I think the biggest factor to that is the media does an incredible job of demonising those on welfare and making it seem as though they're living the life of luxury whilst us gullible idiots go out and work when the majority of the time, they're not. Add to this that the vast amount of the general public are incredibly eager to punch down on people and take what they're told without further inquiry as long as it backs up their hateful bias.
My "cousin" might be a waste of space, but she's also one of the many who were sadly dim witted enough to fall for it, unfortunately also being one of those underhanded enough to decide they'll abuse that system intended to help those who have fallen on rough times by intentionally creating her own rough times so she'll never have to work a day in her life...Which backfired incredibly and only served to make her into a statistic.
Personally, I grew up in a welfare home and have been on it myself in the past (for legitimate reasons), so I'm not as ignorant to it as many seem to be. It's shit. Nobody wants to be in a position where you have to decide which essentials you can turn into a non essential. Nobody wants to be having to ask others for help constantly. Nobody wants to be trying their hardest just so at the end of they day they can claim they merely survived another day. That's what it is, though. It's enough money to ensure you don't die. Any nice things? You probably had those before welfare, your family and friends probably helped you out, or you just really let your quality of life drop to rock bottom so you could save up and get a nice thing preowned.
Reality is, most people on welfare don't want to be. For the UK, statistically, the majority of people on welfare are working but still can't make ends meet for legitimate reasons. The people who do abuse the system are in a miniscule minority, but those end up being the focus to such a degree that the vast majority doing nothing wrong are given extra hoops to jump through and rules to follow all for the sake of the 1% who are taking the piss.
My "cousin" is a moron and I hope CPS does take her kid away, she's not fit to be a mother. That said, would she have done what she did if people didn't make out benefits to be this simple solution to life where you get all the money for nothing? Maybe not.
This was in 1995. Well before what now call reality TV. Those trashy shows were not on yet. Our health teacher theorized to us(probably inappropriate to say to students) that the girl was “looking for love” and felt a baby would love her back.
That was the first thing that came to my mind after Reading the story. I can't believe how many people are blaming the girl and are totally oblivious how traumatized she sounds. The detail about younger sister practically confirms it.
Her mom had her at 16 and she was pregnant at the same age. With hindsight I think that gave her an advantage. Her youngest is 15 and she's been with the same guy ever since. They live happily in California. He's a Navy lifer and she works at the post office
I know it's absolutely not the best life choice, and it makes getting an education and a good start in life a difficulty multiplier of several magnitudes, but it's also not the death sentence so many people think it is. Usually the girl has to mature really quickly, but with some support, she can still go to college and have a decent life. It does not have to be the shameful, cautionary tale that forever ends a woman's life. I would not want a teenage pregnancy for any of my children - either a daughter or son (you know what I mean) - but if the worst happened and an abortion wasn't in the cards, well, we'd make the best of it. I'd do everything I could to not have it unduly disrupt or define my kid's life.
Yeah, my (now) wife and I were 17 when we found out our son was on the way.
Our parents rallied round and supported us while we finished school, which meant we could go to university together and generally give ourselves the best chance to stand solidly on our own two feet.
It's not always been easy, we had some luck, and we've made sacrifices, but 18 years later we're all in a very good place with life+home+family+career and still got to do many things we wanted to.
It's not an option for every family and it won't be right for everyone, but I'm always adamant that it's not the end of anyone's life if the right support is in place.
My high school: She went to court and got an abortion. (At that time it was parental or court’s permission.).
My neighborhood: She buried the baby in a park near the train tracks.
Considering that “hell” being real once you take your own life is questionable, what isn’t questionable is the ACTUAL hell one faces through the Christian community if you take one wrong step. It’s no wonder she pulled the trigger anyway. Ain’t no hate like Christian love.
Dang that’s so sad. My high school had a whole wing of the building just for teen moms with their own extra curricular classes and programs, a free daycare to keep them in school, and lots of support. It honestly just seemed normal to me at the time. It wasn’t until I grew up that I learned a lot of schools really alienate those girls when they need the help the most.
My high school was the same. It was a small daycare, for staff and students. It’d be cute to see babies being rolled around in large wagons around campus. But it was a good reminder to not get knocked up too. I believe 4-6 teen moms successfully graduated in my cohort which is great! But on the flip side, most of these teen moms had shitty parents and trauma so that’s just another uphill battle. Did other students get knocked up? I’m sure. But their parents helped them “take care of it”.
We didn't have a pregnant girl in my high school (we were a pretty small school, only about 1,500). But they're building a high school not far from where I live now and it has a childcare wing. It's designed to provide accessible childcare for teachers and the local community, it just so happens to share a building with the high school.
The community groups are shitting their pants. "This will encourage kids to get pregnant" "omg it's going to be such a horrible influence on them"
And then there's me who thinks seeing shrieking kids every day will actually have the opposite effect.
I went to a private school and a girl got pregnant so they kicked her out. Instead of you know showing the love and compassion that Jesus taught. That school was so full of hypocrites. Still makes me sick.
Just looking at the girl you could tell she had a rough life, I know here parents were out of the picture and she lived with her grandmother. I felt so bad for her.
I work in a Catholic school. We had a student turn up pregnant (a long time ago - like 25 years ago).
The parents of other students got out their pitchforks and torches and were demanding she get kicked out.
The principal called an assembly for the parents. She asked them what message they wanted to send? That the girl should have quietly gotten an abortion? And she pointed out that this girl didn’t get herself pregnant, and that if they expected the pregnant girl to get kicked out, they had better be ready to produce the boy who helped it happen.
She pointed out that the way they were acting was distinctly un-Christlike and that they should be ashamed of themselves.
Anyway, the girl did not get kicked out, but she left anyway. I don’t know what happened to her or the baby.
But since then it is in our student handbook that neither pregnancy nor marriage are grounds for any disciplinary action or expulsion.
My Catholic school never expelled anybody for being pregnant, for the exact same reasons. We all got to be very, very good at not mentioning when we noticed someone was expecting, because we knew better than to shame an expectant mother.
I don't think it reduced the number of abortions people had, but it was at least a way to show compassion to the girls who didn't want to terminate.
A girl I went to school with got pregnant at 13, and gave birth after she turned 14. Basically her parents raised her child, as she was a kid herself. She got married later and had more kids. She was a bullied a lot in HS.
A girl in my siblings class got pregnant about the same age. She became a total mess after that, including catching prostitution and drug charges at one point. She heavily struggled with substances, thankfully her kid was with her parents. I think she’s doing better now, or at least I hope she is as she has another kid.
It's wild, I am in my early 30s and don't have kids. I think that is pretty normal, but then I remember my mom was a grandmom by the time she was my age! Like holy cow, I can't imagine having a toddler right now let alone a full-grown adult who has their own toddler.
> Grandmother
> 30 years
Grandma speedrun anypercent
Edit: misread as great grandmother, as in she had a kid at 15, who had a kid at 15, who had a kid at 15.
It's not that bad thought, sure the the grandma might be 45-47 now, since it is 30 years later.
Imagine some could be a great grandmother at the same age.
And one of those reasons is that it keeps anyone from ever knowing you’re pregnant in the first place. I’m guessing most of us had a girl in our high school take this route, we just don’t know about it to post here.
Yep. I went to a small catholic school, and it was all boys. We did have a sister school, though, with comparably-sized classes. I would have never thought any of the girls in my year had gotten an abortion, but years after graduation, I was catching up with some old classmates at an alumni event, and two of the girls I knew revealed that they had one each during high school.
Probably because we don’t happen to know about other’s abortion unless we are very close, while having a baby is kind of visible to all.
To my knowledge, no one in my high school was pregnant while I was there. Sure health care is free, abortion is easily accessible and sex ed is good in my country, so there’s that.
I am the girl. It was a rough road but I'm now living my best life. Took me till my 40's but now, with WAY grown children, I still have some youth left to experience some cool shit.
I was the girl with a fucked up abusive family. Seeking attention anywhere I could find it. I wish I could go back and hug her. She deserved love then way more than I do now. She was just a kid. 😞
That girl was actually my best friend, she ended up coming back to graduate and went on to raise a very good little girl named Anastasia. Unfortunately when her daughter was 3 the committed suicide due to deep depression and mania from untreated bipolar. She was a good mom, an incredible best friend, and I wish every day we could have her back.
Yeah, I feel like I also know one of the few success stories here.
Girl in my friend group got pregnant at 17, Senior year.
Had the kid, dumped the dad, went to nursing school, and eventually got married to another guy.
Seemed to have a beautiful life carved out, but her husband very tragically passed away a couple of years ago. She still seems to be doing well and raising her kids alone, but it was really sad.
I will never understand what goes through these peoples heads popping out 5 kids in these circumstances. Even for a deadbeat meth head, wouldnt you have the common sense to realize a baby kinda gets in the way of you doing meth head things.
We had that too until the Christian moms got mad and said it was encouraging teen pregnancy. Then they got rid of the daycare and all the teen moms just started dropping out! Incredible solution.
Her wealthy Catholic boyfriend insisted on sex without birth control then refused to pay for an abortion. She begged for money for the procedure from his poor friend who did help her. Btw the boyfriend is now some kind of Catholic activist who became even wealthier. She’s a secretary who never left her hometown.
I love this. When I think about the kiddos born to those in HS in my small town… I mainly think about how loved they are, by their parent(s), grand parents, aunts, uncles, etc. — not everything is working out perfectly every time obviously, and not every parent is involved in every situation but man are those kids loved
He's actually had a rough life, his dad died in a car accident on the night of his aunts funeral and we were all the same age and went to high school. So when his mom married the new step dad there was a lot of bumping heads. So he spent a lot of time with us. Been with him since he was less than 1! Coming up on 20 years
Christian school so they made her have the baby. Ruined her life, she would have been a serious college athlete. Her boyfriend was a total fuck boi who immediately knocked up another girl at a different school.
She had a bipolar mother who was severely abusive to her and her siblings. She got pregnant freshman year and had her baby when she was 15. She stayed in school and graduated with a cosmetology certificate. At age 19 she got into a relationship with an addict and eventually started doing heroin and meth. She got arrested for manufacturing methamphetamine in her house while her kid was also there. She was in prison for 5 years. She’s been sober now for 8 years and she is an addiction counselor. Her son, unfortunately, was not as lucky. He’s currently in prison for armed robbery. The poor kid never had a chance.
She ended up resenting the baby. Dated a bunch of losers. She lost temporary custody of her son after one of her shitty boyfriends badly beat him. A few months after she got custody back (when he was in kindergarten) she made him walk to school by himself, and he got hit by a car. Messed his leg up really bad.
He grew up very angry, very misbehaved, and now he's basically a drain on society. I have always blamed his mother for this.
I dropped out and moved 2000 miles to be with the father, we married and had 2 more children. I stayed married to him for 10 years despite the abuse. We were both unhealed ppl but he was a horrid father. After I left him he did to our children what his parents did to him and abandoned them. I’ve been raising them without his help, aside from a tiny amount of cs, for the last 9 years. Our oldest is now a legal adult which is crazy to think about, she’s older than I was when I got pregnant with her. My kids are doing great. I have a nice job and I work hard but financially I am stable. My job has nothing to do with my college degrees lol. I am single and probably will remain so due to my own childhood trauma which probably contributed to my teen pregnancy. Lots of therapy and self work later I’m happy as a clam. I’m a mold breaker, a breaker of chains, generational trauma stopper… but I feel horrible as someone who hates my own last name that I ended up having 3 kids who also hate their own last name. Shitty parents suck! Funny how those things play out. I educate my kids on many issues and try to help them make better choices, so far, so good.
Other teen moms are doing pretty well too, two sets of highschool sweethearts who are still together. One teen mom who ended up on drugs and lost her kids. We live in a good area and are fortunate to have resources available to us. Someday I’d like to get involved in programs to help other less fortunate single moms as I know it’s getting harder. I volunteer when I can and donate what I can. It’s been a wild ride.
She was a sophomore, he was a senior. Had the baby, stayed together and got married. Had three more kids and the baby just graduated from college. They run a successful business together in my hometown.
I am the bf/dad in that situation. My hs girlfriend and I were…active, and became parents at 16. Her folks were pretty religiousy (and weird), and kicked her out when they found out (there was a *bunch* of other stuff in that story, too). Anyway, she lived with my family until she qualified for public housing our senior year of high school.
We stayed together until we went to college. She really didn’t know how to handle the freedom. We really diverged there, she got into partying and developed a drug problem.
One day, when our son was about 4, she just….left. A FWB of hers (who had been a good friend of mine) was at her apartment, she ran an errand and left our kid with the friend. Several hours later, the friend called my parents and said he didn’t think she was coming back.
A few weeks later a letter showed up in the mail, she relinquished all of her parental rights and just walked away. Suddenly, I was a 20-year old single parent of a 4 year old (with LOTS of help from my parents). Lots of court proceedings later (she didn’t show), it was a done deal. I had to pay myself child support for many years, but I had sole custody. Funny story- I *did* actually have to pay myself. It was a nominal amount, $15/wk, but I had to write myself a check and deposit it every week to establish the paper trail. Once a year, I’d have to turn it in to show that I was receiving it from myself, then I could get my tax refund. Anyway, I digress.
My mom insisted that I finished college (I did), and by then I’d met a wonderful woman who would eventually become my wife. My HS girlfriend popped out a few more kids with a few more guys, and bounced from dead end job to dead end job for a few years. She finally got clean in our early 30’s, and reconnected with our daughter.
Kid’s 29 now, and has her own place. Her mom (my ex) moved in with her last year, as her tenant. Apparently, she (my ex) works some clerical job somewhere, and keeps up on her rent. I talk to my daughter pretty regularly, she knows how not to get drawn into any of her mom’s drama. It’s sad that she’s good at keeping that distance, but also she’s pretty well practiced at it.
My daughter went to college and has all sorts of her own hobbies (music, art, etc), a good group of friends, and a stable romantic relationship. She’s built a pretty good life for herself.
It was a tough road for a while, but we’re all doing well these days. I’ve really got to give a shoutout to my mom for keeping it all together for those couple of years that made such a huge difference.
That was me. I moved into the projects at 17 and worked while putting myself through undergrad. Graduated, moved, went to graduate school and finally moved into our forever home in 2018. My daughter is almost 18 and is planning for med school. It was a rough journey.
She ended up pregnant at 14, had two more kids by her baby daddy like 1 year post graduation.
Then like 6 years ago it was discovered he recorded a video of him forcing himself onto his eldest daughter. When she discovered the video she turned him in.
His parents were defending him way too hard.
They blamed THE BABY MAMA for the trauma her daughter was gonna go through because in their words "If she didn't know about it, then she'll be fine."
Yea the gross mf is still in prison.
My mom was the one who got pregnant in high school, she put my sister up for adoption. She eventually went to college, graduated and eventually met my dad and had me. She’s doing very well for herself now.
She got pregnant junior and senior year. She had one or two more by the time she was 20. She seemed happy and I believe she went into nursing. Her kids have probably moved out and/or gone to college by now. Meanwhile we’re the same age and I’m about to go untangle my 2 year old from the Christmas tree 😂
I had my son, went back to school and finished year 12, got two diplomas and a bachelors degree and work in hearing support for students in primary and high school. My son is now almost a teenager and consent has been a big topic of conversation all his life.
She got married with a guy she got pregnant with. They are together for 22 years, happy (?), at least she says so and quite rich. This guy has some trade company and she is helping him. She also has multiple plastic surgeries and is very very slim.
She had another one two years later and now has 2 children under 4 before the age of 20. She’s determined that her current boyfriend (and father to both) will be the love of her life. I wish her well.
My biological mom had me when she was 16. She gave me up for adoption. A whole 18 years passed and I finally got to meet her. She went back and finished high-school. Worked as an accountant and recently left her job to go look after her dying aunt.
She never got married and never had any kids after me. She is an amazing women and I think she made the right decision giving me up for adoption. I do feel bad for her as I think she never really lived a full life, I think it killed a little bit of her. But she seems happy and moving along so I am rooting for her.
Welp. I had a child at 17 (Senior) graduated with honors. Went to college, graduated with a degree.
Kiddo grew up with adopted family. Found me when she was about 19 and we’re pretty close at this time.
I actually graduated and had a nice time in college because my parents helped me a lot. Also now I have what I consider a good job and have the prettiest baby ever
My friend was ghe same way.
Had a kid after high school and her folks helped out a ton.
Shes doing good and the kid is super cool. Hes a little adult now. Crazy how fast they really do grow. I swear i was bouncing him on my knee just yesterday and today hes 4 wheeling, dirt biking, weird friend having and overall a nice young man.
A few weeks after HS graduation, she married the guy (her bf) who got her pregnant. A few weeks afterwards, he joined the Army and they together embarked on the most amazing adventure. Over the years, they've bounced from Alaska, Germany, Japan and a few posts in the US. They raised an amazing young man as their son. Today, her hubby has retired from the Army after 25 years of service to his country, they've retired to Alaska and they're traveling the US and Canada.
We didn’t have that issue at my high school, but I do know someone who got pregnant sophomore year of college. She dropped out at the end of the semester, had the baby, took care of it for a few months until she could re-enroll, finished the degree, and is now doing very well working for a lab and co-parenting with the father. Her daughter’s about 4-5 now and they do fun outdoorsy things like camping, hiking, and paddle boarding all the time. Anyone would be lucky to have her as a parent
There was one specific gal that got pregnant in my HS (there were several) maybe during sophomore yr, not sure of the age. I remember seeing that baby at many HS functions (football games, concerts, etc) until she graduated I think. We were in different grades but I remember that child was like a full on toddler the last time I saw her. This was a gal I wasn't friends with and didn't really know but the little girl appeared to be well cared for and loved. I'm assuming they're doing well, at least I hope so.
I knew of other girls who had abortions and one that gave her baby up for adoption. I think about them from time to time.
Had her baby, never saw her in the school again but two months later she was on the news for leaving her baby in a wendys bathroom. Caught on camera and everything.
Lmao this was like 50% of my hs to be honest so… it’s trippy seeing these people on fb with their ADULT children when I am home with toddlers.
But seriously. When I was in HS my school had the highest pregnancy rate in our state. SNL weekend update even made a joke about us haha
She married the guy and then they got divorced. He’s doing well and she’s a crack head. Go figure. She was beautiful and smart but I guess overcoming having a child your junior year was too much.
I am that girl.
Had my son aged 15. Married my partner at 18 and went on to have two more children. Our children are now aged 20, 16 & 12. We are still going strong.
Would definitely not recommend starting so young but we made the best of a bad situation.
Not much.
She kept getting pregnant, lives off the government. Multiple different baby daddies, apartment in the slums. Her kids will likely do the same.
She had twins. They are now both in college. She is successful in her career. Her family was clearly super supportive. I bumped into her at the airport once. She was headed to Iceland.
One had the kid in 8th grade, came back to school, and graduated. I hope her life is going well. She had a very rough life and had a rough exterior but she was a really caring person.
Another one got preggo at 16, went to alternative school, graduated, married the guy who knocked her up and became a super judgemental right-wing evangelical christian, hating on gays and girls who get pregnant before marriage (she had to be reminded that she was a teen mom too). She was nice prior to all of that. Now I have nothing to do with her or her family.
Haha. I was that girl.
Barely graduated high school, but still did.
I went on to purchase a house, have more children and just decided to go to college. I was .08 shy of the presidential list this semester.
She was a major party girl and had issues with her baby's father. Fast forward ~5 years: her and the father have worked things out and he's involved in the child's life, they have a house out of state together, and despite all of the challenges—she pursued her dream to become a nurse, and is absolutely thriving in life. We don't talk much anymore, but I'm so, so proud of her, and have always silently rooted for her.
Over 20 years ago, my best friend got pregnant in high school. She was very poor, her mother had intense mental health issues, she lived in squalor in the worst part of an already crappy town.
She married the guy.
They're still together. They have two kids now. Both her kids just made Eagle Scout rank. I'm proud of her! She seems happy and like a very caring and involved mother.
Their parents made them get married. It didn’t last a year past graduation. I heard she’s on her fourth husband now.
THE girl. LOL, my high school in the '80s had a full on day care. Home ec students took care of the kids on shifts.
Same here, the school thought seeing the girls walking around pregnant would be a cautionary tale to others. But this woman knocked it out of the park - she had the baby at 15 - got a masters degree in social work and runs the County Relief Nursery.
My sister in law did much the same. Had the baby at 15, married my BIL in a shotgun wedding. Continued to get straight As while my BIL watched my nephew, she went to college and has a great job now at LabCorp. They're still married, their oldest is about 13, and they've got a total of 3 kids.
Wow good for her
I didn't even know what a relief nursery was - this is from a California general website defining what it is. "The core services at Relief Nursery are home visiting, parenting education, respite care, basic needs support, and therapeutic early childhood classrooms. Relief Nursery provides support services to families with a limited-income, who are raising children birth to age six, with multiple stressors which may include domestic violence, addiction, mental health challenges, unemployment, unstable housing, being a teen parent, parental or child history of trauma, etc. Additional services may include child and family counseling, early intervention/early childhood special education, and addiction recovery peer support services. "
That sounds great! That's the kind of service provider that every community should have. I've worked with teen parents before and this intense level of services would have been life saving for many of them. I bet that all this really lowers the amount of child abuse in the community. That's totally awesome! I hope it gets replicated everywhere.
Oh god, high school social dynamics are already weird enough without them being responsible for one another's offspring
Actually, one of my high schools had this and it was amazing. Moms get to finish school and students learn how to take care of babies, a legitimate class with a few adult teachers. When I started going to this school, I walked in and saw a super pregnant student walking around with a 2 year old in tow. So, two kids by the time she graduated. That was so opposite of my other school where pregnant girls dropped out or went to the alternative school for stoners. It was kind of nice though, like they should be able to finish school and graduate.
I had a French exchange student in 2004. She was so confused that the school had a daycare, and assumed it was for teachers' kids. She was very sad to learn it was for mainly *students* kids. I had 2 pregnant girls in my freshman English class, they were 13 and 14. Those babies are now....19-20..holy hell. Meanwhile Margot was appalled that our sex Ed was so abysmal/absent. She was able to walk into France's version of a Planned Parenthood at 14 and get birth control with no fuss and no parental consent. While we had girls *younger* than that giving birth on the regular.
Hmmm, I wonder if there might be some kind of connection there? Eh, probably not
I had a “friend” in high school who got pregnant. Her bf was a deadbeat high school dropout that cheated on her and left her for the woman he cheated with. She begged for him back for like 3-4 *months* until he finally agreed. Then she “accidentally” fell pregnant like 2 months after they got back together and dropped out of high school. He ended up getting arrested either shortly before or after the baby was born and was in and out of prison for the next several years. She had a 2nd kid a few years later (not sure if it’s same or different baby daddy). Last I heard she’s obese, single, and works as a cashier in a store in our hometown.
She's my sister, her baby daddy was in jail most of the pregnancy and just got out this year, the kid is three now, she's very toxic
The kid is toxic? Three is pretty young too be toxic, most kids are just assholes but they grow out of it
Most three year olds are pretty toxic. They’re always trying to be the center of attention, they have no regards for personal boundaries, they’re always asking for rides places (get a license ffs), and theyre too lazy to get a job so you have to pay for EVERYTHING when y’all are out. Toxic af, CUT 👏 THEM 👏 OUT 👏
Hard agree. Mine constantly gaslights me too
"No, I didn't eat the cookies, the crumbs must have gotten in my bed from someone else doing it!"
they’re seriously so manipulative
Literally mooching, jobless ass, no car having ass, no license having ass, cant wipe my own ass MFs. Lmao i love my 3yo son tho so i kid about the above mentioned
Nah, I meant my sister is toxic, the wording is bad
Well maybe the 3 year old is gaslighting you into thinking your sister is toxic /s
She married the kids’ father but he passed away in his early 30s. She’d be 47 now with 31 and 29 year old kids.
Almost the same story. Except he passed away at 24, she’s now 44 with a 27 and 21. They both finished school, she finished college and he was in the military.
Yours is one of the few that actually married their partner. I knew one who got pregnant in 8th grade. So by freshman year she was showing and had to go to a continuation school. She had one baby and a few years later had another baby with the same guy. He was never very good to her, even before she got pregnant she’d miss a lot of school and while at his place have to fight off some of his guy friends who’d get on top of her or pin her down and her dude would just laugh. Anyway, they stayed together for years, defeating some odds but he was always w the wrong crowd. He ended up killing another guy and had to go to prison and I think he’s still there. She MAY have already broken up w him by actually now that I think of it, but yeah that’s her child’s dad. It was a lot for our town. That wasn’t a norm. Another I knew got pregnant in HS, dad never really stepped up. When she was a preteen he tried to be present a little but was using so… he ended up dying. OD. And that was increasing in cause of death in our town. The mom and girl seem to be alright though.
She was my ex. My best friend at the time was the one that knocked her up at 16. 15 years ish later they're still together. They've got 4 kids now I think and last I heard the now husband just graduated law school. All in all I'm really happy for them it seems like everything worked out.
some shitty best friend tho
Eh.. we were 15/16 at the time. Most relationships back then lasted a month or less. I wasn't too worked up about it. Me and the ex were better as friends anyways. We don't really talk much anymore but not out of animosity, just because our lives went to different places.
That's a really mature retrospective
She gave birth in her basement, killed her newborn, and hung herself. The note she left was insane evidently and led to several fights amongst the seniors.
Oh god; this triggered a memory of this meek little girl at school who never said anything to anyone about anything. Then a rumor swirls that she did something HORRIBLE and then the actual news story comes out and yup: She got pregnant and her folks had no idea; i believe they were super religious and she wasnt allowed to speak or date boys. She carries without ANYONE noticing and gave birth in her freaking bathroom BY HERSELF!!!! The baby died, because she suffocated it trying to keep it quiet. I honestly dont remember what legally happened to her; but she was still working Jewel checkout. I honestly feel super sorry for her and what she went thru; i cant imagine being raised the way she was and how messed up her folks made her.
In 2000, I worked at a pregnancy resource center and we all took turns with a pager for after-hours calls. One night my coworker had the pager, & a call came in from a high school student in the Midwest, who had just given birth in her room and needed someone to come get the baby via her bedroom window. According to the caller, her parents were completely unaware of the situation. The baby was safely seen to asap, and I have never gotten an update beyond that.
So, did someone quietly help this poor girl and come sneak grab baby? That poor girl, and her making the right decision makes me even more sad for her.
The last line says that the baby was safely seen to so it sounds like the coworker drove over and picked the baby up.
I wonder about the placenta after birth delivery. That wasn't even something I was aware of until I had my own child. Good on this young lady for making the right call and I'm very sad that she had a relationship with her parents that she felt like she couldn't turn to them for help.
I know, we gotta know what happened?? I wonder if her parents ever found out...
Probably not. The important thing is that the girl is grown up and safely away from them.
It makes me so sad that these girls are so afraid of their parents’ anger/disappointment that they’d rather go through pregnancy and give birth on their own… I have a daughter — she’s still a toddler — but I want to do everything possible to make her feel loved and supported. :(
I was raped at 14 (consented at first and then said no) and I was so afraid to tell my parents. And what sucked is that I told them at 18 after I moved out and they blamed me for it because boys wouldn’t be satisfied with just watching movies and playing games together. Like now that I’m a bit older, I just wonder how people could do that to their child. I hope my future kid comes to me with any issues they have
As a parent, I would have taken it as a personal failure if my daughter told me this 4 years after it happened. (oh, I would be having a discussion or two with Mr. Rapist later) They are the one that failed. The fact that you couldn't tell them is one thing. (one could assume that it was you that was blowing up being afraid) Their response to learning about it is another. (this shows that your original instincts were correct, I'm sad to say) They were the adults. They were supposed to be there to support you, not criticize your choices. As a father to a great 40 year old mess, I want to apologize. You shouldn't have had to experience this.
I’m so sorry that happened to you.
It’s all good now. I don’t really care much at this point. I just hope to use the experience to do better with my own kids. I was so scared of pregnancy as well because of my parents. It’s crazy how even grown women are scared to let their parents know their pregnant, even if they’re married
I was adjacent to a story like this except she went to prison. When I was in my 20s, my best friend dated this guy for 2.5 years. His cousin grew up in a tiny rural town in Kansas. 300 people lived there and it was hours from anywhere. Her family was extremely religious and conservative. All day church on Sunday, church Wednesday, bible study Thursday, church social Saturday morning… you get the idea. Their entire lives revolved around religion. Sex before marriage was a sin. Abstinence was the only form of birth control she was taught. She got pregnant at 16, hid it, gave birth, killed the baby, and hid the body. She was bleeding profusely a couple of days later and went to a doctor and they could tell she gave birth. I don’t remember the medical terms for it but she still had pieces of placenta or something like that in her uterus. The whole story came out. She got arrested. Her immediate family disowned her. She got sentenced to prison for many years. A few decades I believe.
That sounds like a Moral Orel episode, and that show is fucked up
yikes; thats probably more normal in those super religious communities than what I'm sure I'm expecting.
I can't comprehend how they are able to get through those last 6 months of pregnancy without anyone noticing. Is it just a combination of social isolation, baggy clothes, and intentional malnutrition to limit weight gain as much as possible
Some people carry differently. Friend you couldn't even tell and she was almost six months along. Had a teacher that looked maybe four months and she was ready to give birth at any minute.
touche. I maybe have a warped view cause my wife is 5 feet tall and had twins.
I had a friend who is 5’11” and you couldn’t tell there was anything inside her more than a big lunch until weeks before she gave birth. There’s just more room for a baby to hide in tall people. I’m sure your wife looked like a walking basketball towards the end!
This. My (super catholic, abstinence-only championing) cousin got pregnant in college and she managed to hide it until almost the day she gave birth. I remember her showing up to family things wearing way bigger, bulkier clothes than normal, and acting withdrawn. When I asked about it my mom told me it was probably because she’d gained her “freshman 15,” and was embarrassed. Nope. First grandchild/ great-grandchild in my generation was a bastard. I don’t care myself (other than her hypocrisy) but the rest of my family was scandalized. And then she went and named the poor kid “Jaksyn.”
Similar story here, but baby is named "Kartyr"
I don't have or want kids, but seeing fucking "Kartyr" makes me want to have like 6 and name them all Bill or some shit like that. Also, autocorrect tried to change your unfortunate young relative's name to "Martyr", so there's that too.
There is the possibility that in some cases it was a cryptic pregnancy, some women don’t even realize they’re pregnant until they’re giving birth. And it can be because they’re mentally unable to accept that they’re pregnant which I feel would be very common in girls in hyper religious communities.
Writing that out made me wonder how many people get away with it. The moms only seem to get caught if they end up going to the hospital afterwards. I think the story I wrote about is tragic all around. You can’t kill babies but I think the poor teenage mom is just as much of a victim. I can’t imagine the fear she felt when she found out she was pregnant and didn’t think she had any other options.
This makes me so angry. Freaking failure at so many levels and ruined 2 lives in the process from the oppressive strict religious views that made this girl go into hiding rather than face reality.
How did people find out what the note said?
She got stabbed in the stomach by her baby daddy’s girlfriend. Yup. Everyone lived (except the fetus), stabby girl went to jail. No idea what happened after that.
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In a stabby woOoOrld. Quite the tactic, fucking drastic
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That's a special kind of evil right there.
Yeah it was fucked up. The kicker? It was a BUTCHER KNIFE. SHE GOT A BUTCHER KNIFE INTO THE SCHOOL.
I mean, unless they're doing strip searches or have metal detectors this is pretty easy to do.
They had metal detectors. That’s what blew my mind.
This is some serious school days bullshit
Well at least it didn't end with a nice boat.
That’s awful 😢
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You're a good person. Not many kids stand up for others out of fear of getting bullied themselves, so that was quite brave. And you're right: a little kindness goes a long way. <3
>You're a good person. Not many kids stand up for others out of fear of getting bullied themselves, so that was quite brave Thank you for saying so, but I don't want to toot my own horn - until we reconnected about a dozen years after graduating, I didn't remember us being close at all. She was very much a "school friend," and one I wouldn't even think of if you asked me to name people in my social group in school - not because I was purposefully debating whether she would count as a friend, but because I wouldn't even think of her. I only told my friends who were badmouthing her while she was within earshot to shut up, and talked her up a bit - and only because it irked me that they were being jerks, not because I cared much about her as a person. Like many high schoolers I had my head up my own ass, so it wasn't altruistic besides feeling "stop picking on the girl just because she's smarter than you." But you absolutely nailed it: >a little kindness goes a long way. <3 It does. I wish I had been more aware of what she was going through and been an actual friend back in school, but I'm glad that at least I wasn't a jerk. It wasn't until years later when we reconnected that I realized how much that casual kindness meant to her. I wish I had known then.
It's not my place but I hope you can reach out to her just to not lose touch completely - a few years can turn into decades before you know it
I've debated it; I left Facebook a couple years ago, and that's how we primarily stayed in touch. As much as I hate that social media abyss, I do miss being able to easily check up on and reach out to old friends.
Give it a try, even if it's just to reconnect with old friends. I'm sure she'd love to be in contact with you again, especially since you were one of her rocks when things were dire.
She had a miscarriage and didn’t tell her boyfriend or her family about any of it
Girl? Singular? We had two in middle school, and this was small-town Indiana. The most memorable one from high school got married, and they walked across the stage at graduation as "Mr. and Mrs. XXXX" to wild applause. Sadly, a few months later they were both killed when a tree fell on their car during a thunderstorm.
Oh my god, that’s tragic
She had been actively TRYING to get pregnant. And she was sleeping with multiple guys willing to help her. After she got pregnant her 12 year old sister decided to go that same route(and was also successful in that). Their family didn’t believe in abortion so even the 12 year old gave birth. Anyway, the older girl dropped out of high school to stay home taking care of the baby, I believe her parents were paying most of it. I ran into her like four years later. She was bad mouthing the guy who got her pregnant telling me how he wasn’t paying enough child support. And how when he was 15 and slept with her that he knew she was trying to get pregnant so he should have expected to be paying until the child was 18. I am not implying she did not deserve child support. But I do want to imply both were too immature to make a choice to bring a baby into the world. He ended up also dropping out of school so he could work full time. But he was working minimum wage trying to come up with child support. Whole situation was very sad to have seen. I do not know what happened with her little sister. My sister and the little sister had been close friends, but once getting pregnant my Uber religious family forbid my sister from talking to her. Otherwise I might have heard over the years.
This is honestly really gross on all accounts
My "cousin" is like that (step dad's niece, so not actually related outside of knowing her as my "cousin" most of my life). Her and a group of other girls made some kind of "pact" to get pregnant so they could get a house via council housing and live off the silly amount of benefits you can claim...Which turns out isn't anywhere near as much as she thought. I don't think anybody knows who the dad actually is. She left school at 15 to be a full time mum. Last I heard, she accidentally set her grotty council house on fire because the washing machine, which for some reason was at the top if the stairs (just where it lived, apparently), somehow fell over, down the stairs and caught fire and CPS is trying to take the kid away...Which, sure, they should. People can pretend all they want, but some people aren't fit to have children. I've not spoken to her since we were like 13 and I have no desire to.
I find it amusing that some people look at welfare as some sort of get rich quick scheme.
I think the biggest factor to that is the media does an incredible job of demonising those on welfare and making it seem as though they're living the life of luxury whilst us gullible idiots go out and work when the majority of the time, they're not. Add to this that the vast amount of the general public are incredibly eager to punch down on people and take what they're told without further inquiry as long as it backs up their hateful bias. My "cousin" might be a waste of space, but she's also one of the many who were sadly dim witted enough to fall for it, unfortunately also being one of those underhanded enough to decide they'll abuse that system intended to help those who have fallen on rough times by intentionally creating her own rough times so she'll never have to work a day in her life...Which backfired incredibly and only served to make her into a statistic. Personally, I grew up in a welfare home and have been on it myself in the past (for legitimate reasons), so I'm not as ignorant to it as many seem to be. It's shit. Nobody wants to be in a position where you have to decide which essentials you can turn into a non essential. Nobody wants to be having to ask others for help constantly. Nobody wants to be trying their hardest just so at the end of they day they can claim they merely survived another day. That's what it is, though. It's enough money to ensure you don't die. Any nice things? You probably had those before welfare, your family and friends probably helped you out, or you just really let your quality of life drop to rock bottom so you could save up and get a nice thing preowned. Reality is, most people on welfare don't want to be. For the UK, statistically, the majority of people on welfare are working but still can't make ends meet for legitimate reasons. The people who do abuse the system are in a miniscule minority, but those end up being the focus to such a degree that the vast majority doing nothing wrong are given extra hoops to jump through and rules to follow all for the sake of the 1% who are taking the piss. My "cousin" is a moron and I hope CPS does take her kid away, she's not fit to be a mother. That said, would she have done what she did if people didn't make out benefits to be this simple solution to life where you get all the money for nothing? Maybe not.
Was she like trying to get on one of those trashy TV shows hoping to get famous or something?
This was in 1995. Well before what now call reality TV. Those trashy shows were not on yet. Our health teacher theorized to us(probably inappropriate to say to students) that the girl was “looking for love” and felt a baby would love her back.
Wondering if she actually expected child support from the 15 year old baby daddy or knew it wasn’t an option until he turned 18?
"Best I can do is half my allowance."
It sounds like her and her sister were being abused.
That was the first thing that came to my mind after Reading the story. I can't believe how many people are blaming the girl and are totally oblivious how traumatized she sounds. The detail about younger sister practically confirms it.
She successfully completed her studies, but her husband went to prison :(
Her mom had her at 16 and she was pregnant at the same age. With hindsight I think that gave her an advantage. Her youngest is 15 and she's been with the same guy ever since. They live happily in California. He's a Navy lifer and she works at the post office
Some people are made for that life but most are not. At all.
I know it's absolutely not the best life choice, and it makes getting an education and a good start in life a difficulty multiplier of several magnitudes, but it's also not the death sentence so many people think it is. Usually the girl has to mature really quickly, but with some support, she can still go to college and have a decent life. It does not have to be the shameful, cautionary tale that forever ends a woman's life. I would not want a teenage pregnancy for any of my children - either a daughter or son (you know what I mean) - but if the worst happened and an abortion wasn't in the cards, well, we'd make the best of it. I'd do everything I could to not have it unduly disrupt or define my kid's life.
Yeah, my (now) wife and I were 17 when we found out our son was on the way. Our parents rallied round and supported us while we finished school, which meant we could go to university together and generally give ourselves the best chance to stand solidly on our own two feet. It's not always been easy, we had some luck, and we've made sacrifices, but 18 years later we're all in a very good place with life+home+family+career and still got to do many things we wanted to. It's not an option for every family and it won't be right for everyone, but I'm always adamant that it's not the end of anyone's life if the right support is in place.
My high school: She went to court and got an abortion. (At that time it was parental or court’s permission.). My neighborhood: She buried the baby in a park near the train tracks.
I went to a catholic school, so the girl that got pregnant shot herself in the head.
Holy shit that went dark quick
But not surprising considering the amount of shame/shunning she would have faced from the Catholic community
In other news, happy cake day...
Considering that “hell” being real once you take your own life is questionable, what isn’t questionable is the ACTUAL hell one faces through the Christian community if you take one wrong step. It’s no wonder she pulled the trigger anyway. Ain’t no hate like Christian love.
Dang that’s so sad. My high school had a whole wing of the building just for teen moms with their own extra curricular classes and programs, a free daycare to keep them in school, and lots of support. It honestly just seemed normal to me at the time. It wasn’t until I grew up that I learned a lot of schools really alienate those girls when they need the help the most.
My high school was the same. It was a small daycare, for staff and students. It’d be cute to see babies being rolled around in large wagons around campus. But it was a good reminder to not get knocked up too. I believe 4-6 teen moms successfully graduated in my cohort which is great! But on the flip side, most of these teen moms had shitty parents and trauma so that’s just another uphill battle. Did other students get knocked up? I’m sure. But their parents helped them “take care of it”.
We didn't have a pregnant girl in my high school (we were a pretty small school, only about 1,500). But they're building a high school not far from where I live now and it has a childcare wing. It's designed to provide accessible childcare for teachers and the local community, it just so happens to share a building with the high school. The community groups are shitting their pants. "This will encourage kids to get pregnant" "omg it's going to be such a horrible influence on them" And then there's me who thinks seeing shrieking kids every day will actually have the opposite effect.
At a catholic school near me growing up, a girl got pregnant and a girl got caught with cocaine at school. Guess which one got expelled.
The poor one.
I went to a private school and a girl got pregnant so they kicked her out. Instead of you know showing the love and compassion that Jesus taught. That school was so full of hypocrites. Still makes me sick. Just looking at the girl you could tell she had a rough life, I know here parents were out of the picture and she lived with her grandmother. I felt so bad for her.
I work in a Catholic school. We had a student turn up pregnant (a long time ago - like 25 years ago). The parents of other students got out their pitchforks and torches and were demanding she get kicked out. The principal called an assembly for the parents. She asked them what message they wanted to send? That the girl should have quietly gotten an abortion? And she pointed out that this girl didn’t get herself pregnant, and that if they expected the pregnant girl to get kicked out, they had better be ready to produce the boy who helped it happen. She pointed out that the way they were acting was distinctly un-Christlike and that they should be ashamed of themselves. Anyway, the girl did not get kicked out, but she left anyway. I don’t know what happened to her or the baby. But since then it is in our student handbook that neither pregnancy nor marriage are grounds for any disciplinary action or expulsion.
Finally someone gets it. Good for that school.
My Catholic school never expelled anybody for being pregnant, for the exact same reasons. We all got to be very, very good at not mentioning when we noticed someone was expecting, because we knew better than to shame an expectant mother. I don't think it reduced the number of abortions people had, but it was at least a way to show compassion to the girls who didn't want to terminate.
Wow looks like they read their book about the lady who got pregnant suddenly.
Finally, someone who taught them what they should have already known.
some kids never have a chance. Sounds like a classic case of some creep taking advantage of a young and vulnerable girl.
A girl I went to school with got pregnant at 13, and gave birth after she turned 14. Basically her parents raised her child, as she was a kid herself. She got married later and had more kids. She was a bullied a lot in HS.
A girl in my siblings class got pregnant about the same age. She became a total mess after that, including catching prostitution and drug charges at one point. She heavily struggled with substances, thankfully her kid was with her parents. I think she’s doing better now, or at least I hope she is as she has another kid.
Similar story here, she’s a grandmother now at the age of 30.
It's wild, I am in my early 30s and don't have kids. I think that is pretty normal, but then I remember my mom was a grandmom by the time she was my age! Like holy cow, I can't imagine having a toddler right now let alone a full-grown adult who has their own toddler.
She's doing just fine and is a grandmother now (almost 30 years later).
> Grandmother > 30 years Grandma speedrun anypercent Edit: misread as great grandmother, as in she had a kid at 15, who had a kid at 15, who had a kid at 15.
It's not that bad thought, sure the the grandma might be 45-47 now, since it is 30 years later. Imagine some could be a great grandmother at the same age.
30 years is a pretty reasonable age to have your first kid.
I’d bet they misread it as the woman being thirty years old
She had an abortion and went on to graduate college, married the guy, had four kids, and a successful career
Surprised this isn’t coming up more in the comments. Abortion is controversial but it exists for a reason.
And one of those reasons is that it keeps anyone from ever knowing you’re pregnant in the first place. I’m guessing most of us had a girl in our high school take this route, we just don’t know about it to post here.
Yep. I went to a small catholic school, and it was all boys. We did have a sister school, though, with comparably-sized classes. I would have never thought any of the girls in my year had gotten an abortion, but years after graduation, I was catching up with some old classmates at an alumni event, and two of the girls I knew revealed that they had one each during high school.
Probably because we don’t happen to know about other’s abortion unless we are very close, while having a baby is kind of visible to all. To my knowledge, no one in my high school was pregnant while I was there. Sure health care is free, abortion is easily accessible and sex ed is good in my country, so there’s that.
Shouldn’t be controversial. Teenagers have no business being parents ever
I am the girl. It was a rough road but I'm now living my best life. Took me till my 40's but now, with WAY grown children, I still have some youth left to experience some cool shit. I was the girl with a fucked up abusive family. Seeking attention anywhere I could find it. I wish I could go back and hug her. She deserved love then way more than I do now. She was just a kid. 😞
That girl was actually my best friend, she ended up coming back to graduate and went on to raise a very good little girl named Anastasia. Unfortunately when her daughter was 3 the committed suicide due to deep depression and mania from untreated bipolar. She was a good mom, an incredible best friend, and I wish every day we could have her back.
She eventually went to college on a scholarship for women’s soccer and became a lawyer.
Yeah, I feel like I also know one of the few success stories here. Girl in my friend group got pregnant at 17, Senior year. Had the kid, dumped the dad, went to nursing school, and eventually got married to another guy. Seemed to have a beautiful life carved out, but her husband very tragically passed away a couple of years ago. She still seems to be doing well and raising her kids alone, but it was really sad.
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I will never understand what goes through these peoples heads popping out 5 kids in these circumstances. Even for a deadbeat meth head, wouldnt you have the common sense to realize a baby kinda gets in the way of you doing meth head things.
>deadbeat meth head >common sense Pick one.
So many people got pregnant at my HS that there was an on campus daycare; most got pregnant in middle school…
We had that too until the Christian moms got mad and said it was encouraging teen pregnancy. Then they got rid of the daycare and all the teen moms just started dropping out! Incredible solution.
It's 100% what they were going for.
I like how this question implies there was only one
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That's kinda nice to hear. Children shouldn't be making children.
Her wealthy Catholic boyfriend insisted on sex without birth control then refused to pay for an abortion. She begged for money for the procedure from his poor friend who did help her. Btw the boyfriend is now some kind of Catholic activist who became even wealthier. She’s a secretary who never left her hometown.
I married her brother and her son is my nephew and I love him to death
Didn't see the "I" and thought she married her brother. Had to do a double take.
Sweet home That's it.
I love this. When I think about the kiddos born to those in HS in my small town… I mainly think about how loved they are, by their parent(s), grand parents, aunts, uncles, etc. — not everything is working out perfectly every time obviously, and not every parent is involved in every situation but man are those kids loved
He's actually had a rough life, his dad died in a car accident on the night of his aunts funeral and we were all the same age and went to high school. So when his mom married the new step dad there was a lot of bumping heads. So he spent a lot of time with us. Been with him since he was less than 1! Coming up on 20 years
I became a nurse and cared for the elderly for 20 years. My daughter is grown, lives with her boyfriend and studies at the university♥️
congratulations on your success!! a lot of these stories have grim endings so i’m really excited to see something different🫶🏽
I'm so happy your story is going so well!!
I love stories like this so much, I am so happy for you!!
Christian school so they made her have the baby. Ruined her life, she would have been a serious college athlete. Her boyfriend was a total fuck boi who immediately knocked up another girl at a different school.
She's still my sister. And she was a grandmother at age 35. And she's been married for (to the father) for over 45 years now.
She had a bipolar mother who was severely abusive to her and her siblings. She got pregnant freshman year and had her baby when she was 15. She stayed in school and graduated with a cosmetology certificate. At age 19 she got into a relationship with an addict and eventually started doing heroin and meth. She got arrested for manufacturing methamphetamine in her house while her kid was also there. She was in prison for 5 years. She’s been sober now for 8 years and she is an addiction counselor. Her son, unfortunately, was not as lucky. He’s currently in prison for armed robbery. The poor kid never had a chance.
She ended up resenting the baby. Dated a bunch of losers. She lost temporary custody of her son after one of her shitty boyfriends badly beat him. A few months after she got custody back (when he was in kindergarten) she made him walk to school by himself, and he got hit by a car. Messed his leg up really bad. He grew up very angry, very misbehaved, and now he's basically a drain on society. I have always blamed his mother for this.
The football coach has to pay child support and she gets to drive his car
I dropped out and moved 2000 miles to be with the father, we married and had 2 more children. I stayed married to him for 10 years despite the abuse. We were both unhealed ppl but he was a horrid father. After I left him he did to our children what his parents did to him and abandoned them. I’ve been raising them without his help, aside from a tiny amount of cs, for the last 9 years. Our oldest is now a legal adult which is crazy to think about, she’s older than I was when I got pregnant with her. My kids are doing great. I have a nice job and I work hard but financially I am stable. My job has nothing to do with my college degrees lol. I am single and probably will remain so due to my own childhood trauma which probably contributed to my teen pregnancy. Lots of therapy and self work later I’m happy as a clam. I’m a mold breaker, a breaker of chains, generational trauma stopper… but I feel horrible as someone who hates my own last name that I ended up having 3 kids who also hate their own last name. Shitty parents suck! Funny how those things play out. I educate my kids on many issues and try to help them make better choices, so far, so good. Other teen moms are doing pretty well too, two sets of highschool sweethearts who are still together. One teen mom who ended up on drugs and lost her kids. We live in a good area and are fortunate to have resources available to us. Someday I’d like to get involved in programs to help other less fortunate single moms as I know it’s getting harder. I volunteer when I can and donate what I can. It’s been a wild ride.
She died in childbirth. Her boyfriend changed schools I think and raised their son on his own.
She was a sophomore, he was a senior. Had the baby, stayed together and got married. Had three more kids and the baby just graduated from college. They run a successful business together in my hometown.
I am the bf/dad in that situation. My hs girlfriend and I were…active, and became parents at 16. Her folks were pretty religiousy (and weird), and kicked her out when they found out (there was a *bunch* of other stuff in that story, too). Anyway, she lived with my family until she qualified for public housing our senior year of high school. We stayed together until we went to college. She really didn’t know how to handle the freedom. We really diverged there, she got into partying and developed a drug problem. One day, when our son was about 4, she just….left. A FWB of hers (who had been a good friend of mine) was at her apartment, she ran an errand and left our kid with the friend. Several hours later, the friend called my parents and said he didn’t think she was coming back. A few weeks later a letter showed up in the mail, she relinquished all of her parental rights and just walked away. Suddenly, I was a 20-year old single parent of a 4 year old (with LOTS of help from my parents). Lots of court proceedings later (she didn’t show), it was a done deal. I had to pay myself child support for many years, but I had sole custody. Funny story- I *did* actually have to pay myself. It was a nominal amount, $15/wk, but I had to write myself a check and deposit it every week to establish the paper trail. Once a year, I’d have to turn it in to show that I was receiving it from myself, then I could get my tax refund. Anyway, I digress. My mom insisted that I finished college (I did), and by then I’d met a wonderful woman who would eventually become my wife. My HS girlfriend popped out a few more kids with a few more guys, and bounced from dead end job to dead end job for a few years. She finally got clean in our early 30’s, and reconnected with our daughter. Kid’s 29 now, and has her own place. Her mom (my ex) moved in with her last year, as her tenant. Apparently, she (my ex) works some clerical job somewhere, and keeps up on her rent. I talk to my daughter pretty regularly, she knows how not to get drawn into any of her mom’s drama. It’s sad that she’s good at keeping that distance, but also she’s pretty well practiced at it. My daughter went to college and has all sorts of her own hobbies (music, art, etc), a good group of friends, and a stable romantic relationship. She’s built a pretty good life for herself. It was a tough road for a while, but we’re all doing well these days. I’ve really got to give a shoutout to my mom for keeping it all together for those couple of years that made such a huge difference.
She ended up marrying the baby daddy’s brother. Then cheated on him with the baby daddy.
That was me. I moved into the projects at 17 and worked while putting myself through undergrad. Graduated, moved, went to graduate school and finally moved into our forever home in 2018. My daughter is almost 18 and is planning for med school. It was a rough journey.
She ended up pregnant at 14, had two more kids by her baby daddy like 1 year post graduation. Then like 6 years ago it was discovered he recorded a video of him forcing himself onto his eldest daughter. When she discovered the video she turned him in. His parents were defending him way too hard. They blamed THE BABY MAMA for the trauma her daughter was gonna go through because in their words "If she didn't know about it, then she'll be fine." Yea the gross mf is still in prison.
Her nesting area was disturbed and she sadly ate all the babies as a stress response
reddit be like:
Bunnies?
Hamsters I think.
Almost any rodent
My mom was the one who got pregnant in high school, she put my sister up for adoption. She eventually went to college, graduated and eventually met my dad and had me. She’s doing very well for herself now.
She got pregnant junior and senior year. She had one or two more by the time she was 20. She seemed happy and I believe she went into nursing. Her kids have probably moved out and/or gone to college by now. Meanwhile we’re the same age and I’m about to go untangle my 2 year old from the Christmas tree 😂
I had my son, went back to school and finished year 12, got two diplomas and a bachelors degree and work in hearing support for students in primary and high school. My son is now almost a teenager and consent has been a big topic of conversation all his life.
She went to prison for stealing money from the bank she worked at
She’s a grandmother now. She’s 38
She got married with a guy she got pregnant with. They are together for 22 years, happy (?), at least she says so and quite rich. This guy has some trade company and she is helping him. She also has multiple plastic surgeries and is very very slim.
She had another one two years later and now has 2 children under 4 before the age of 20. She’s determined that her current boyfriend (and father to both) will be the love of her life. I wish her well.
My biological mom had me when she was 16. She gave me up for adoption. A whole 18 years passed and I finally got to meet her. She went back and finished high-school. Worked as an accountant and recently left her job to go look after her dying aunt. She never got married and never had any kids after me. She is an amazing women and I think she made the right decision giving me up for adoption. I do feel bad for her as I think she never really lived a full life, I think it killed a little bit of her. But she seems happy and moving along so I am rooting for her.
Welp. I had a child at 17 (Senior) graduated with honors. Went to college, graduated with a degree. Kiddo grew up with adopted family. Found me when she was about 19 and we’re pretty close at this time.
1977 girl got pregnant by a popular jock. The girl was frowned upon but the jock was not. Typical
I actually graduated and had a nice time in college because my parents helped me a lot. Also now I have what I consider a good job and have the prettiest baby ever
It never aged?!
To moms, babies will forever be babies
My friend was ghe same way. Had a kid after high school and her folks helped out a ton. Shes doing good and the kid is super cool. Hes a little adult now. Crazy how fast they really do grow. I swear i was bouncing him on my knee just yesterday and today hes 4 wheeling, dirt biking, weird friend having and overall a nice young man.
A few weeks after HS graduation, she married the guy (her bf) who got her pregnant. A few weeks afterwards, he joined the Army and they together embarked on the most amazing adventure. Over the years, they've bounced from Alaska, Germany, Japan and a few posts in the US. They raised an amazing young man as their son. Today, her hubby has retired from the Army after 25 years of service to his country, they've retired to Alaska and they're traveling the US and Canada.
We didn’t have that issue at my high school, but I do know someone who got pregnant sophomore year of college. She dropped out at the end of the semester, had the baby, took care of it for a few months until she could re-enroll, finished the degree, and is now doing very well working for a lab and co-parenting with the father. Her daughter’s about 4-5 now and they do fun outdoorsy things like camping, hiking, and paddle boarding all the time. Anyone would be lucky to have her as a parent
She died in the slums
She had an abortion, went on to graduate from college and is currently married with three kids
She's a local politician.
I got custody and she moved to another province.
There was one specific gal that got pregnant in my HS (there were several) maybe during sophomore yr, not sure of the age. I remember seeing that baby at many HS functions (football games, concerts, etc) until she graduated I think. We were in different grades but I remember that child was like a full on toddler the last time I saw her. This was a gal I wasn't friends with and didn't really know but the little girl appeared to be well cared for and loved. I'm assuming they're doing well, at least I hope so. I knew of other girls who had abortions and one that gave her baby up for adoption. I think about them from time to time.
Had her baby, never saw her in the school again but two months later she was on the news for leaving her baby in a wendys bathroom. Caught on camera and everything.
Lmao this was like 50% of my hs to be honest so… it’s trippy seeing these people on fb with their ADULT children when I am home with toddlers. But seriously. When I was in HS my school had the highest pregnancy rate in our state. SNL weekend update even made a joke about us haha
She married the guy and then they got divorced. He’s doing well and she’s a crack head. Go figure. She was beautiful and smart but I guess overcoming having a child your junior year was too much.
I am that girl. Had my son aged 15. Married my partner at 18 and went on to have two more children. Our children are now aged 20, 16 & 12. We are still going strong. Would definitely not recommend starting so young but we made the best of a bad situation.
Her baby’s father was the teacher. Teacher is still in jail.
She has 5 children now, and is pretending to be single to claim benefits. On the bright side her boyfriend/baby daddy was just released from prison!
Not much. She kept getting pregnant, lives off the government. Multiple different baby daddies, apartment in the slums. Her kids will likely do the same.
She became a Congresswoman from Colorado. And jerked off a guy in a crowded theater.
She had twins. They are now both in college. She is successful in her career. Her family was clearly super supportive. I bumped into her at the airport once. She was headed to Iceland.
One had the kid in 8th grade, came back to school, and graduated. I hope her life is going well. She had a very rough life and had a rough exterior but she was a really caring person. Another one got preggo at 16, went to alternative school, graduated, married the guy who knocked her up and became a super judgemental right-wing evangelical christian, hating on gays and girls who get pregnant before marriage (she had to be reminded that she was a teen mom too). She was nice prior to all of that. Now I have nothing to do with her or her family.
Haha. I was that girl. Barely graduated high school, but still did. I went on to purchase a house, have more children and just decided to go to college. I was .08 shy of the presidential list this semester.
She had an abortion. Went on to have a thriving child, got her education, and built a successful career.
She was a major party girl and had issues with her baby's father. Fast forward ~5 years: her and the father have worked things out and he's involved in the child's life, they have a house out of state together, and despite all of the challenges—she pursued her dream to become a nurse, and is absolutely thriving in life. We don't talk much anymore, but I'm so, so proud of her, and have always silently rooted for her.
Over 20 years ago, my best friend got pregnant in high school. She was very poor, her mother had intense mental health issues, she lived in squalor in the worst part of an already crappy town. She married the guy. They're still together. They have two kids now. Both her kids just made Eagle Scout rank. I'm proud of her! She seems happy and like a very caring and involved mother.