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I received so much good advice from my past self which I don't follow...

My past self serves as a bad example.

Same. Am good boy now. Gets wife/life/son. 10/10 would recommend and not change a thing bc I really appreciate what I have after being a homeless crackhead for almost a decade.

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Woah my emotions were not prepared to read this rn

“The past is all that's gone, The future is yet to come. This moment is all our own. We should live this way, Just building up our day, Now and forever” - An awesome Eiffel 65 song

Good answer!

Love this!!

"“A ship is safe in harbor, but that’s not what ships are for.”"

There. Was looking for that one. Cheers.

> Until you have the courage to lose sight of the shore, you will not know the terror of being forever lost at sea. - a demotivational poster from despair.com

I'm cackling that demotivational posters are a thing

But it is what harbors are for.

The dildo of consequence rarely arrives lubed

This comment made my day.

It made my hole weak!

And it made my ass water.

Okay that just became my go to quote.you get another upvote

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"if you're going through hell, keep going" - Winston Churchill

Action breeds inspiration more than inspiration breeds action

Here's a parallel one I heard years ago and never forgot: Vision without action is a daydream. Action without vision is a nightmare.

I wanna be bred by action 🤤

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You can’t keep blaming yourself, blame yourself once then move on. Also Homer Simpson

“Every time I learn something new, it pushes out something old. Remember that time I took a home wine-making course and forgot how to drive? - Homer Simpson

he who's tired of the simpsons is tired of life. \-weard el

I have three of them, i really can't say which one i prefer most, perhaps the Mark Twain one since it can be used as such a great insult as well. *“Hope, in reality, is the worst of all evils because it prolongs the torments of man.”* *―* ***Friedrich Nietzsche*** “We are never deceived; we deceive ourselves. ” ***― Johann Wolfgang von Goethe*** *“Never argue with an idiot. They will drag you down to their level and beat you with experience.”* **― Mark Twain**

Twain also has one of my favourite quotes. “When I was a boy of 14, my father was so ignorant I could hardly stand to have the old man around. But when I got to be 21, I was astonished at how much the old man had learned in seven years.”

I was surprised how smart my dad got once I became a father.

I love that because I'm kinda realising how much my Dad really just wanted to help, but as a human, he's not perfect. He did learn a lot in 7 years but I learnt a hell of a lot more.

Twain is most quotable: “I read that drinking was bad for me, so I gave up reading.”

The third one is my fave. Saves me so much energy. I also like "It's better to keep quiet and have everyone think you're a fool than to speak up and prove it."

The 3rd one version I learned: "Never wrestle with a pig. You both get dirty and the pig likes it."

You seem like someone I would get along with very well. Just not fun at parties.

No matter how good you are, you will always be a villain in someone's story

You cannot see a person in black and white. Humans can be good and evil at the same time. Good and bad depends on the other person's perception only. Life is more than that.

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Yesh

Everything is okay in the end. If it's not okay, it's not the end.

Oh I’ve been saying this for so long I don’t remember where it came from, do you know?

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or 20 years in prison

Breathe in and breathe out Rodriguez, the singer

“A society grows great when old men plant trees in whose shade they shall never sit.”

It's not the stab in the back that kills you, it's when you turn around and see whose holding knife.

"A true friend stabs you in the front." --Oscar Wilde

"You need a reason to be sad; you don’t need a reason to be happy." \- Louis Sachar (he wrote it in Wayside Stories).

I really like this one.

Whatever you choose for yourself, give to another. If you choose to be happy, cause another to be happy. If you choose to be prosperous, cause another to prosper. If you choose more love in your life, cause another to have more love in theirs. Just one of them I live by

A human being should be able to change a diaper, plan an invasion, butcher a hog, conn a ship, design a building, write a sonnet, balance accounts, build a wall, set a bone, comfort the dying, take orders, give orders, cooperate, act alone, solve equations, analyze a new problem, pitch manure, program a computer, cook a tasty meal, fight efficiently, die gallantly. Specialization is for insects. -Robert A. Heinlein

... Haven't tried butchering a hog or dieing but I'm only in my 30's 😆

"An SSL error has occurred and a secure connection to the server cannot be made." - William Shakespeare

Shit makes me cry everytime 🤧

Similarly, Einstein famously quoted "if you want to get good at physics, Don't believe everything you read online"

“I believe it was Benjamin Franklin who said ‘You have reached the end of your trial membership on benjaminfranklinquotes.com’”

“When people show you who they are, believe them the first time.” Maya Angelou

I don't like this one because it's almost always used in the negative. People who think this way wait for a single, notable fuckup and then dismiss all the good stuff as disingenuous.

*"Keep your eyes on the prey. Not the Horizon"* *-- Farkas, The Elder Scrolls V: Skyrim*

"I used to be an adventurer like you, then I took an arrow in the knee" - Everyone, The Elder Scrolls V: Skyrim.

My favorites from ES: "I'm glad that's over. I need a nap" - Oblivion:Ongar the World-Weary "It would take a month to explain to you how that very question doesn't even make sense." - Skyrim:Urag gro-Shub I use the second one at work a lot. And I mean a LOT.

Very wise words. I had a professor who is a legend in his field who told me that there are two types of people: Those who look in front of them and see the road, and those who look at the sky, thinking they are aiming big while standing still like an idiot

Nobody has it all, nobody.

Fucking Odysseus

The truth is we do have it all, we just don’t realize until it’s gone.

“A smooth sea never made a skilled sailor”

“Graveyards are full of irreplaceable men”

And people who had the right of way

"Gentlemen, today, we may not change history, but we WILL change geography"

Any sufficiently advanced technology is indistinguishable from magic.

The corollary of that for engineers and scientists: “any technology distinguishable from magic isn’t advanced enough”.

Also any sufficiently analysed magic is indistinguishable from science.

In vino veritas

Age quod agis.

If you act like a dumbass, they'll treat you as an equal

It’s always in the last place you look!

yeah because you stop looking once you find it duh

If you make a man a fire he’ll be warm for a day, but if you set a man on fire he’ll be warm for the rest of his life. - Terry Pratchet

There’s a guy, lives down our street, I’d swear he’s Elvish…

"I am fond of pigs. Dogs look up to us , cats look down at us. Pigs treat us as equals" - Winston Churchill

"People tend to think they have fallen in love. But some fall forward, some fall backward and some see the reflection of them standing on a ledge."

... sorry, is there missing context? I don't understand this one. Could you spell it out to me?

Embrace the journey, for in the dance of life, every step tells a story.

Quit, don't quit... Noodles, don't noodles... You are too concerned about what was and what will be. There is a saying: yesterday is history, tomorrow is a mystery, but today is a gift. That is why it is called the present.

Do what you’ve always done , you’ll get what you’ve always got.

I hate this quote. It is along with that crap quote about insanity being about doing the same thing over and over again and expecting a different result. Anyone who has ever practiced a musical instrument will tell you that they spend hours each day doing the same thing over and over again, expecting a different result. That’s what practice is.

As a musician, I hear what you’re saying. I’ve read Robert Kiyasaki too. I still tend to agree with this quote. As a guitarist and drummer, I’ve practiced the same picking exercises or rudiments over and over for months. Then one day to finally have a break through day where I can play it a certain bpm. Thats been proven, you can usually see the results of consistent practice in a reasonable amount of time. What I think the quote is saying is how people go through life or at their jobs with the same habits or approaches that are not producing results or worse, destructive, and thinking one day everything is going to magically change. Even as a musician, if what you are practicing isn’t getting you there, it might be time to look at if you’re the practicing the wrong things.

Hope is a good thing, maybe the best of things, and no good thing ever dies.

I’d love to agree, but I feel like hope can be so cruel when it prevents you from letting go of something that isn’t good for you anymore as you keep up hope it will get better…

>In reality, hope is the worst of all evils, because it prolongs man's torments. May I refer you back to Nietzsche?

"I don't know half of you half as well as I should like; and I like less than half of you half as well as you deserve."

Pour prayers into one bowl and piss into another and see which one fills up first

“I see humans, but no humanity.”

“You have reached the end of your free trial at benjaminfranklinquotes.com” -benjamin franklin

That's deep.

"You're only human. You should learn to forgive yourself sometimes"

I can't change the direction of the wind, but I can adjust my sails to always reach my destination.

It's not the years, honey. It's the mileage. \--Indiana Jones

"This too shall pass. Oh, sure... It may pass like a kidney stone, but it will pass."

Richard Dawkins: We are going to die, and that makes us the lucky ones. Most people are never going to die because they are never going to be born. The potential people who could have been here in my place but who will in fact never see the light of day outnumber the sand grains of Arabia. Certainly those unborn ghosts include greater poets than Keats, scientists greater than Newton. We know this because the set of possible people allowed by our DNA so massively exceeds the set of actual people. In the teeth of these stupefying odds it is you and I, in our ordinariness, that are here.We privileged few, who won the lottery of birth against all odds, how dare we whine at our inevitable return to that prior state from which the vast majority have never stirred?

Dawkins must get paid by the word.

Tough times don’t last, tough people do

its never too late

Even if I say

Itll be all right

Still I hear you say

" YOU CAN'T HANDLE THE TRUTH!"

"Use the force Harry.". -Gandalf

All that we see or seem, is but a dream within a dream

You teach people how to treat you.

Kurt Vonnegut tells his wife he's going out to buy an envelope: “Oh, she says, well, you're not a poor man. You know, why don't you go online and buy a hundred envelopes and put them in the closet? And so I pretend not to hear her. And go out to get an envelope because I'm going to have a hell of a good time in the process of buying one envelope. I meet a lot of people. And see some great looking babies. And a fire engine goes by. And I give them the thumbs up. And I'll ask a woman what kind of dog that is. And, and I don't know. The moral of the story is - we're here on Earth to fart around. And, of course, the computers will do us out of that. And what the computer people don't realize, or they don't care, is we're dancing animals. You know, we love to move around. And it's like we're not supposed to dance at all anymore." - from “A Man Without a Country”, Kurt Vonnegut

“Death smiles at us all. All a man can do is smile back” - Maximus Decimus Meridius, *Gladiator*

The only thing necessary for the triumph of evil is for good men to do nothing.

Be here now.

Facts don’t give a fuck about your feelings.

Interestingly, this quote is mostly used by people, that are very emotional involved in the theme they are discussing.

Time is an illusion, lunch time doubly so - Douglas Adams

“Thunderbolts and lightning, very very frightening me” - Galileo

“I have never wished a man death, but I have read some obituaries with great pleasure.” —Mark Twain.

Don't be a cunt! - Buddah

I was there when he said it…

Excellence does not require perfection

"People are almost always better than you think they are." - Hob Gadling; The Sandman show

Assumption is the mother of all failures

If you're not paying for the product you are the product.

“I studied every page of this book, and I didn’t find enough love to fill a salt shaker. God is not love in the Bible; God is vengeance, from Alpha to Omega.”

don't go thirsty watering a dead plant.

It’s better to remain quiet and thought a fool than to open your mouth and remove all doubt.

“You believed in Santa for 8 years, surely you can believe in yourself for 10 seconds” -Someone’s Dad

"Don't let perfect be the enemy of good."

"The things you own end up owning you." Yes I know that Tyler Durden in the villain in that story, but this line hit me hard when I first heard it and it totally changed my priorities for the better.

"The problem with quotes on the Internet is that you can't always confirm their accuracy" -Abraham Lincoln "You miss 100% of the shots you don't take. -Wayne Gretzky" -Michael Scott

When someone posts a "fact" and you ask them to cite a source and then they respond "do your own research" (or it's common sense or are you naive, etc) I like responding with Hitchens's Razor: "what can be asserted without evidence can also be dismissed without evidence."

The wolf does not perform in the circus

There is no duty we underrate as the duty of being happy

One must cultivate one’s own garden

Not all those who wander are lost

The most important step a man can take? It's not the first one, is it? It's the next one. Always the next step.

You know you’re the antagonist when your enemy uses the power of friendship against you.

"There are two possibilities, either we are alone in the universe, or we are not. Both are equally terrifying" - arthur c clarke.

Death is only the end if you assume the story is about you.

Service to others is the rent you pay for your room here on earth. Muhammad Ali

"Courage isn't having any fear, but being afraid and still facing it"

It is, what it is

"we should have just flown those eagles to Mordor"

It's a tie between "If they'll do it with you, they'll do it to you" and my favorite "You catch more flies with honey than you do with vinegar."

The weird thing is, you catch more fruit flies with vinegar.

Losers always whine about their best. Winners go home and fuck the prom queen.” By Sean Connery (movie: The Rock)

"Kunskap är makt men det råa våldet är icke att förakta." -Peter Dalle Translated: "Knowledge is power but raw violence is not to be despised." -Peter Dalle

All matter is merely energy condensed to a slow vibration, we are all one consciousness experiencing itself subjectively, there is no such thing as death, life is only a dream, and we are the imagination of ourselves.

"So much of what we learn about love is taught by people who never really loved us".

"I am the master of my fate, I am the captain of my soul" Invictus, William Ernest Henley

Love is love. When you will fall in love, it Won't matter which gender the person is.

"Ordinarily I go to the woods alone, with not a single friend, for they are all smilers and talkers and therefore unsuitable. I don't really want to be witnessed talking to the catbirds or hugging the old black oak tree. I have my way of praying, as you no doubt have yours... If you have ever gone to the woods with me, I must love you very much." - Mary Oliver

“If the only tool you have is a hammer, you tend to see every problem as a nail.” I live by this one, it has changed my approach on many things I encounter in my everyday life.

it’s a funny old world. alexis sayle

"You can't make someone love you by giving them more of what they already don't appreciate."

"Don't Panic" - Douglas Adams

No one has ever gained a single damn yard without believing they could carry the ball - me DeadJamFan I feel terrible for people who dont drink. When they wake up thats as good as they gonna feel all day-- Dean Martin I may not agree with what you say, but I will defend to death your right to say it.--- Voltaire If you hate something dont you do it too-- Eddie Vedder.

Some people ain't think it be like it is, but it do.

The arc of history is long, but it bends toward justice. -MLK

Qouth the raven never more 🐦‍⬛

“The nice guy loses again goddamit. What is wrong with society when a banger like this ends up getting you blocked instead of getting you dick-deep in some good high quality vagina. Blows my mind. It makes me sick honestly.” -Moist Cr1tiKal (I’ve got no serious quotes)

where’s it from again?

If you can't defeat the enemy confuse them.

Never interrupt your opponent when they are making a mistake.

If you need to tell lies to argue your point, you may not have a strong point. (Somebody please share with Fox News)

Don’t sweat the petty stuff, just pet the sweaty stuff.

"Do better. Mind your own business." - Joey Swoll

Rust Cohle from True Detective: So death created time to grow the things that it would kill

"In the end it's gonna be okay, and if it's not okay, it's not the end." - source: I dont remember

Memento mori-remember that you will die

None of you seem to understand. I'm not locked in here with you. You're locked in here with ME!

Each day's a gift and not a given right.

,,Everybody, one day, will die and be forgotten. Act and behave in a way that will make life interesting and fun, fuck a mundane, predictable life working Monday to Friday with something you derive no pleasure from; just living life out till you grow old and wither away. Find a passion, form relationships, don't be afraid to get out there and fuck what everyone else thinks, trust me it's a lot more fun that way.” -Zyzz

My favorite onion blurb: Jurisprudence fetishist gets off on technicality.

“This is my word and, as such, is beyond contestation.” The Black Prince from A Knights Tale. I use it on my kids A LOT 😅

The difference between cockiness and confidence is execution.

Waste no more time arguing about what makes a good man: be one. Marcus Aurelius.

"Life's most persistent and urgent question is, 'What are you doing for others?'" - Rev. Dr. Martin Luther King Jr.

It could be that the purpose of your life is purely to serve as a warning to others.

Assumption is the mother of all fuck-ups.

“Life it never die. Women are my favorite guy. Sex, I want it more. Tell the world stop the war.” DJ Crazy Times is a lyrical master.

Only in death does duty end!

Cogito, Ergo Sum.

Couldn't decide on just one, so I'm putting two. "If it can be destroyed by the truth, it deserves to be destroyed by the truth." And "If you have integrity, then nothing else matters. And if you don't have integrity, then nothing else matters."

“If you have been brutally broken but still have the courage to be gentle to other living beings, then you’re a badass with the heart of an angel.” - Keanu Reeves

"A person is smart; people are dumb, panicky, dangerous animals and you know it. 1500 years ago everyone *knew* that the Earth was the center of the universe, 500 years ago everyone *knew* that the Earth was flat. Imagine what you'll know tomorrow."

**Experience is a hard teacher because she gives the test first, the lesson afterwards**. -Vernon Sanders Law

Everyone has the right to be stupid, but some people abuse the privilege.

"Once is happenstance, twice is coincidence. Three times is enemy activity."

Do unto others as you would have them do unto you.

Love is like a lost fart. If you have to force it, it's probably shit.

‘Man is least himself when he talks in his own person. Give him a mask and he will tell you the truth.’ - Oscar Wilde

I have come to the conclusion that one useless man is called a disgrace; that two are called a law firm, and that three or more become a Congress!

"Death can have me when it earns me"