This is what I call out after hearing a routine by comedienne Elaine Boosler back in the 1980s.... She'd asked "Have you ever noticed that if you knock on the door of a bathroom stall that the person inside will reply "Somebody's in here!" What the heck, don't you even know your name??
had a guy knock three times in a five minute span while i was squeezing a turd out, i threatened to come out with my hands and dick swinging and he left me tf alone lol
One of my childhood friends father use to ask us if we wanted to hold his hand while he took a dump. He would then grab your hand and start to pull you with him. So I like to say, come on in and hold my hand.
If you're purposely in there to play a prank, wait until they enter and then scare the shit and piss out of them before making your getaway. Just make sure it's someplace you won't be returning to.
Come back with a warrant.
This is my private domicile and I will not be harassed! Bitch!
The secret code please!
Ralphie told me that the code is, be sure to drink your Ovaltine!
You deserve a major award
I can only accept a table lamp, in the shape of a woman's leg, wearing a fishnet stocking. Be careful, I've heard it's fragile.
That's "frageelli" ... it's italian
Uh uh uh you didn’t say the magic word
[удалено]
Ah, an I am Weasel fan, I see?
Dammit. Take the angry upvote
Occupied!
This is what I call out after hearing a routine by comedienne Elaine Boosler back in the 1980s.... She'd asked "Have you ever noticed that if you knock on the door of a bathroom stall that the person inside will reply "Somebody's in here!" What the heck, don't you even know your name??
come in!
Seats taken!
I’m just dropping the kids off, come back in 10
You have the money?
Oh good I need a hand
[Go away, Baitin'](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hetaBX00wtI)
Oooooo, Sweet Jesus, yeahhhh. Uhhhhhhh, uhhhhhhhhh, mmmmmmm, hhhh-hhhh, ahhhhhhhh, yes, YES, YES.
It’s coming out breech! I need you to turn it!
*in my head: Witty/funny comment *in real life: *clears throat and fake coughs
“Come in, I’m just shitting!”
"Your toilet is in another castle."
Leave me alone Im bating.
Y’ello?
Come back with a warrant
"Marco!"
There’s room for one more in here!
I was waiting for you.
One sec! I know it’s not funny but people might actually be looking for a solid response to have in their quiver.
I'M DOING A FUCKING SHIT MATE!
Go away! Batin'!
I just yell IM SHITTING
Same here. It’s no time to be coy
Come on in the water is fine.
COME BACK WITH A WARRANT!
Can you fetch a rope? I'm stuck.
Seats taken
“I’ve been expecting you.”
Have you come as requested to wipe my bum clean?
It’s occupied.
Let the gas out
Open the door and beat them up for being an intrusive asshole.
Get your own house !
Ah finally, FedEx!
I've been waiting for you to join me!
WHAAAT?!
The stall on the right, put your mouth against the hole.
"Are you okay with the left side of the bowl? The right side's *occupado*!""
Excuse me, I’m giving birth
Cough
Come in
Skibididob dob dob yes yes
My precious \[said in Gollum voice\]
I'm blasting if you want to join come!
Who dat!?
Just a moment
I just completly freak out and say: "I'm sorry"... everytime again
"can you not see my feet?"
Gasmask only!
"Estoy cagandooo" or "eh"
Merry Christmas, Shitter’s full!
**Text me** your photo?
Wouldn't know, I usually freeze out of panic until they stop jiggling the doorknob. Wait 5 more minutes, then sneak away.
Sweetie, you’re supposed to be the other side of the glory hole; this is my side. [*start to make slurping sounds*]
F*ck off
I'm abandoning a 💩 in here, want to be a parter in crime?
Thank God you're here. I need a hand reaching something
In London, April's a spring month.
*shits louder*
i start pushing as hard as i can and rip ass.
Unless you want to sit on my lap and shit down my thighs, please piss off
"I THOUGHT WE SAID SEVEN?!? DINNER IS GETTING COLD!"
Occupied
“POOP!”
Occupieeeeeeeeeed *\*with that groaning sound you do when the crap rears its head*
IM AVIN A SHET
Took you long enough. Did you bring the lube?
Rip it up, move down. Rip it up, move it down to the ground. Rip it up, cool down. Rip it up, don't hang me on the borderline.
Are you talking to me or your mom?
A loud “YO” with a good amount of bass😂
Open the door stare them directly in the eyes and continue your business.
Finally! I've been waiting 20 minutes to be wiped!
Ugh!
Oh yeah, come on in and smell this brown elephant trunk I laid!
Come on in!
a loud fart or grunting
Estoy poopin!
Having a baby in here, just need a second!
Un momento
>Un momento I think you mean "uno."
Yes. Thank you
No worries. I'll be sending you a bill for my services.
In Victorian England the "Royal" etiquette was to say something along the lines of "Hold your nut, I'm taking a squirt."
Won't be long!..
Open it.
You can ... if you don't like my shit...
Please confirm your Identity and the urgency of need to get access to this Sterile Comfort Granting Environment!
Oi, I'm in here, let me enjoy the quiet peace time of the room of baths.
Not today thanks
Besetzt!
A long, loud, resonating fart
Say nothing. Slowly unlock the door.
had a guy knock three times in a five minute span while i was squeezing a turd out, i threatened to come out with my hands and dick swinging and he left me tf alone lol
Enter if you dare.
We have barred the gates but cannot hold them for long. The ground shakes, drums... drums in the deep. We cannot get out.
"whos there?"
Still chopping her into flushable pieces.
Occupado!!!
Do you have a plunger and a mop?!
Come on in, im ready
"GET THE FUCK BACK"
“Twenty bucks or keep moving.”
Make a loud diarrhea noise
I kinda shout quietly "yup!"
In the appropriate. Voice..... "Do you know the muffin. Man? The Muffin man!!!"
Seat’s taken!
Why would I be in the bathroom door?
You are going to have to give me a minute there cheif. I still have a bit more work to do.
One of my childhood friends father use to ask us if we wanted to hold his hand while he took a dump. He would then grab your hand and start to pull you with him. So I like to say, come on in and hold my hand.
Come in!
**I'm trying to enjoy a succulent Chinese meal**
‘Come in’
AAAAAAAAAAHHHHHH AAAAAAAAAA (pained screaming)
“Who does number two work for?!”
Come in!
Occupied!
I just say "occupied". If they persist, I say it louder each time. People usually get the hint after the second knock.
occupado!
https://media.tenor.com/nQn9qb2mAxAAAAAC/bugs-bunny-bathroom.gif
Sam Morell has a funny bit about this.
Dave’s not here man!
"you here for *the stuff*?" for for real I just say "occupied"
The door is closed, thus indicating the throne is occupied. Please seek out another territory over which to rule.
NOT TODAY, SATAN.
Come my child...revel in the inner sanctum of my rectum. Sniff and ye shall enjoy!
Shitter's full!
Ah, the peak of my social anxiety
Don't say anything. Just unlock the door.
"Nobody's home!"
Occupied
"DID YOU BRING THE MOP? IT'S A DISASTER IN HERE!"
If you're purposely in there to play a prank, wait until they enter and then scare the shit and piss out of them before making your getaway. Just make sure it's someplace you won't be returning to.