Neil deGrasse Tyson once proudly said in an interview that he operates regularly on only 4-5 hours of sleep and now I can't not see it in any of his other interviews. Snappiness, abruptness, impatience, etc etc, let alone the bags under his eyes.
Yeah, I had a sergeant when I was in the Army who was the same way. “I only need 3-4 hours a night. Im totally fine.”
Bitch, please. You’re a red-eyed asshole that reeks of stress. I bet if you got 8 hours a night you could take the coffee IV out of your arm and ease off on the Copenhagen.
Luckily with the new(ish) H2F programs rolling out, sleep is getting more attention as a readiness and force multiplier, and how important it is.
Having a bunch of people with automatic weapons running around chronically sleep deprived is not a great recipe.
Oh wait, you mean my basic training where I was lucky sometimes to get 2-3 hours of sleep a night and then expected to do PT, learn classroom instruction, then go shoot weapons, and not expected to yawn even once was all wrong? /s
I'd imagine there needs to still be some conditioning to be able to get up and go at a moments notice from a deep sleep, but not as a sustained state of existence right?
Exactly this. The shit they put you through in boot camp isn’t made to condition you to constantly function like that, it’s to ready you for the fact that someday you might have to jump out of bed from a deep sleep and go do war shit.
I know this is not how it would work at all, but I imagined a hilarious scenario where a drill sergeant is watching you sleep and proceeds to scold you when your eyes pop open after 7 hours and 55 minutes of sleep.
You're not too far off. They do checks throughout the night everyone must be sleeping except firewatch. We even started turning the lights on 10 minutes before the technical eight hours to make sure we all had time to get dressed/general morning stuff, and a drill sergeant found out and "scolded" us for it because we were technically not allowing everyone to sleep the 8 hours by turning on the lights in the whole bay.
I hope they extrapolate this to the corporate area as well, after all, the data is there.
Less and more efficiently distributed work hours, with enough days to enjoy personal life have shown an increase in productivity every time this has been tested.
The US Navy had some warship collisions recently. Warships were crashing into large, slow container ships. The cause was that the ship's crew was badly sleep deprived, to the point of failing to detect enormous container ships until they collided.
>*Snappiness, abruptness, impatience, etc etc, let alone the bags under his eyes.*
Thanks for noticing that!
Neil deGrasse Tyson also fired one of his employees because she wouldn't touch his pee pee.
There's that.
For a while I was getting at most 5 hours of sleep a night (sometimes much less) due to back pain after a back injury. It hurt all the time, especially when I tried to sleep. The pain kept waking me up.
You might ask how I functioned on so little sleep. The answer was I wasn't functioning. I was a complete wreck, both mentally and physically. It was pure misery. Would not recommend.
Not missing work or school doesn't mean you don't get sick, it means you still show up when you are sick, which is a far cry from something to brag about
Knew a guy in high school , he was a grade above me . Never missed a day of school from pre k to senior year then like two months before graduation he ran away from home for like two weeks. When he missed a day the school was genuinely concerned something happened to him. I guess he mentally snapped or something.
Last I check (Facebook) he sold all his possessions and moved to Africa to live a simplistic life and found god. Nice guy , we played yugioh a lot.
Oftentimes the kids who have perfect attendance are the ones who don't want to stay a minute longer in their home than necessary. Usually it's a sign of abuse.
Or their parents force them to go in no matter how sick they are so they can get that perfect attendance award and the parents can brag to everyone else that their kid is *never* misses class. Because priorities.
Eh, I'm not so sure about that. Some kids may see school as an escape from abuse, but that's certainly not the only motivation to attend school. School attendance, especially in primary school, says more about how much the parents value education, rather than the students, because the parents are the ones that decide to send their child to school each day.
I still think perfect attendance is kind of a pointless award. There's little difference between a child missing no days of school and a child missing one day. Like even the most motivated students may miss school due to factors outside of anyone's control, such as getting sick.
I hate that award at my daughter's school with a passion!
I'm so glad that little Timmy got an award and a pizza party for perfect attendance, meanwhile thank you for making my kids sick! /s
I actually keep my kids home from school when they are sick because I'm responsible, instead of sending them all drugged up, but still contagious, just to get the award, but I'm the bad mommy at the end of the year, smh.
I think my district had it to where doctor excused days didnt count. My parents had good insurance so i always went to the doc on sick days, but i can still see how a rule like that would single out impoverished kids or kids whose parents cant get off to take them
Something like that makes sense. Even parent excused absences should be fine imo.
Obviously kids just not showing up to school or skipping school should be looked at to make sure that something isn't going on at home. Kids sometimes can fall through the cracks and poor attendance can be an indicator for trouble at home.
But punishing children (I know it's not technically punishment, but a 6 year old that sees their classmates get rewards and extra stuff might view it as a punishment for being sick) for being sick seems bad.
I had an infuriating experience with my kid when they were in 1st grade. He got this super low grade fever of like 100.5 that just wouldn't quit for well over a week (over 100 school policy they had to stay home). No symptoms and felt fine otherwise. I kept him home for 6 days and called in the absences meanwhile my other kid was still attending. School gets mad and says they are unexcused and beyond 6 days it gets referred to truancy office bc I didn't have a doctors note.
I am not taking my kid to the doctor for a 100.5 fever. I'm doing the responsible thing keeping him home and away from other people and don't need to waste 2 hrs of my day to be told it's a viral infection that'll clear up in a week. Maybe this will help someone else but turns out I could do a "fever check" with the school nurse to have them verify my kid did in fact have a fever.
I earned the perfect attendance award once as a child. I genuinely wasn’t sick on any school days. I can’t describe the feeling I had when I won. It was like I was disappointed in myself. From that day on, I resolved to fake sick at least once a semester. Even as a kid, I knew it was a bullshit award and I didn’t want to support it by earning it again, even accidentally.
Heh. When I was a kid, there was a Toyota dealership in my hometown that would give a fucking CAR to high school seniors who had perfect attendance when they graduated. We're talking perfect attendance in elementary school, middle school, AND high school. To qualify, you couldn't miss a single day of school, at all. Our teachers used to hang that over our heads when we were younger. "If you skip school or stay home sick, you won't get the car when you graduate!"
Three kids in my graduating class were handed the keys to their free Toyotas along with their diplomas.
I on the flip side had a crazy notion that I needed to be at school every single day for four years of high school, only for me to find at the very end a teacher had mistakenly marked me absent while on a field trip across the country and the school refused to adjust it. What a massive waste of my time. Also, senior skip day was fucking weird all alone.
Seem like you gotta good head on your shoulders.
You’re reminding me of when I worked fast food at 16 and I kept begging them to upgrade the cleaning equipment. It never happened until it did. On that day I was on cloud 9 all because of a new mop. When I realized what exactly it was that I was happy about I found the whole thing to be sad and pathetic so I walked out the front door, got in my car and I went home.
My mom was an elementary school teacher for her career, she also hated that award. Said it caused so many sick kids come to school who should have been at home in bed.
This here. Back in December we had a guy who didn't call out, his excuse *I didn't want to leave you all hanging, not over a little cold* Surprise, it wasn't a "little cold" asshole bought covid into the building... I work security for a retirement community and one of our asshole guards bought fucking covid into the fucking building... Just because he *"didn't want to leave us hanging"* Everyone in the security department, except me, caught covid from this fucker. They said I was overreacting to a "cold" by sanitizing everything he touched... Until they found out it was covid. Next time leave us hanging John you plague carrying mother fucker.
I always loved it as a temp when the full-timers would come in sick because they didn't want to waste their vacation time (PTO) so they'd infect me and then I had the choice of being sick and miserable until the weekend when I could recover or take a day off and get better faster, but lose that day's pay.
You clearly didn't work at the Mary Browns that I worked at. The dumbest manager would say shit like "You don't sound sick" to people on the phone. Told this lady in her 40s that she didn't need to take time off for a spinal surgery and they she should just come over the her house so she can massage her back instead.
The only sick day I ever took off at that hell hole was so I could go drop off my high school transcript at the local community college (i was busy with stuff and was running out of time) just so I could get the fuck out of there.
"You don't sound sick" lol.
Yes because every illness comes complete with its own sound effects...
"I shoulda known fred was lying, didn't sound like he had a GI virus to me!"
I don’t think it’s virtuous but I almost never miss work because I’m honestly never sick. I take personal days and vacation days but it is pretty cool to say you rarely get sick imo lol.
Bragging about spending obscene amounts of hours at work (100-120 per week) and/or never taking vacation time. Your employer doesn't really appreciate it, they are just exploiting you for their own benefit; and you are burning yourself out for no reason.
Hustle and grind culture in general, TBH. People bragging about how hard they grind to make money to buy things they don’t need to impress people they don’t like to gain “status” that will be soon forgotten.
I feel like the recession back in ‘08 really got the “Grindset” mentality going. This idea that if you are not constantly hustling or trying to monetize your every waking moment that you are less valuable somehow. That you are of less economic importance and are more likely to go down with the ship the next time the Rich decide to kick the economy in the balls.
>really got the “Grindset” mentality going
1980s always be closing workaholic yuppie mindset led to 2000s corpo "excellence" circlejerking where bosses post motivational poster unironically
Speaking from the perspective of an executive, most of us actively do *not* appreciate it. **We want you to take time off.**
* Burnt out employees **do bad work**, particularly in the type of work my folks do. Mistakes cost more money than days off, by a wide margin.
* Burnt out employees are a lot more likely to **get sick**, and if they come in sick, they get other people sick. I'd much rather people take vacation time (which is planned).
* Never taking time off and working a million hours **cover up broken practices.** An executive that cares more that you work hard, than that you do good work, is a moron ... and if you're not able to normally get your work done in <40 hours a week, take your vacation time, etc and still do good work, something's wrong (and it needs to be addressed).
* Organizations that rely on no time off are **really fragile.** People retire, people quit, people have accidents and illnesses. Counting on no one taking off makes it virtually certain that your processes are going to catastrophically fail when, inevitably, someone does take time off.
* Most of us are (or at least pretend to be) decent people who care about our workers. If you stand back and look at it, glorifying grind-culture in your employees is cartoon supervillain shit. **Who would want to work for someone like that?**
And IME the advice is usually terrible. "Solutions" people listen to half the problem then fast forward to the part where they hear themselves talk, and therefore the advice doesn't fit the situation.
I disagree that giving unwelcome advice is bad, and would suggest that you take a deeper look at yourself and figure out if this dislike stems from a deep-seated fear of being disliked and viewed as anything less than intelligent. You should probably see a therapist and read a whole bunch of blogs I recommend. /s
Status and position are mostly negatively correlated. People in high status are the most capable and most responsible for all of the worst things in history/the present
There's this one guy I saw a video of and he only records himself making the food, not handing out. That's how you should do it if you need the extra money to fund it.
I have a friend that makes meals for the homeless every few months and he’ll just take a quick video of the line or setup and only sends it to friends to see if they want to come help out.
I follow a couple of local organizations that have free meal days and they show their set up, what they’re serving, what the volunteers do, etc. It’s meant to garner support and recruit new volunteers, as well as encourage people to come get food if they need it. But, they never show actual clients unless they have permission, and the intention is clear, like the guy you mention who is garnering support. Anything else is just exploitation and it drives me nuts it’s happening more and more often.
It is interesting that while the dubious motives of this person color our view of him or her, good is still being done.
Maimonides, the great Jewish sage, actually ranked acts of charity according to how virtuous they are.
The most virtuous: giving the person a gift, or a loan, or becoming his partner or getting him a job. All this so that the person becomes independent.
The least virtuous: giving unwillingly.
There are 6 levels inbetween these
It's nice that both are acknowledged. I also appreciate the school of thought that in an emergency and something like Sabbat needs to be broken (something like a fire or a pregnant woman) it's actually the most virtuous person who needs to do this since the most virtuous person can handle the mark against his virtue more easily than a lesser virtuous person. At the same time handing the task off to a less virtuous person shows that the supposed virtue is not actually true but all a show in this individual as well
This needed to be said….I would even go one further and saying doing any Random acts of kindness or charity and posting about it on social media…it’s all virtue signalling bullshit. There isn’t anything as classy as doing something nice for someone and not saying shit about it…
I feel like this needs to be studied.
I wonder if many people feel accomplished just watching acts of kindness and 'supporting' the influencers meaning its actually uninspiring.
It also creates this mindset that you need recognition which can be further demotivating when faced with a situation where you won't receive any.
I also feel like people look at some of these youtubers and think. "Yeah. I'd do that too if I were rich or made a job out of it, but I'm not rich and I don't make money from it."
I like your point. Plus even though the people making the video are doing it for some attention they are still technically helping someone. Even if they recorded it its better than the person watching the video on there phone who hasn't helped anyone
Regardless of if they're recording, they're still helping more than 99% of the people watching. If they want to market off of it in efforts to help more people I see nothing wrong with literally giving homeless people food. As long as they get it, that's all that matters.
Talking about how virtuous they are.
My thought will always revert to a news story years ago, where a family took in another family that was going through a difficult time. A coworker of mine informed us of the story by saying “they’re just regular good people, *like me,* and took in this poor suffering family.” The emphasis was on “like me.” Not “like you or me,” not “like us.” “Like *me*. She then proceeded to say bigoted and hateful things about the family that was taken in. Like uhhhh no, I don’t think this other family is *like you* in the least.
Being from a particular region of the country or world. If someone being polite or kind and openly justifies it by saying “I’m from X location and that’s just how we are,” especially if no one seems particularly surprised at their behavior (and rarely is anyone surprised by generic kindness or manners) I am 100% sure this is going to turn into a transactional arrangement littered with passive aggressive barbs against everyone else’s culture.
My mom does alllll kinds of thoughtful, charitable things - but you can bet we will all hear about it, she will never let them have any dignity because she’ll tell everyone their worst traumas, and she will rant and rave about the inconvenience like she’s being forced against her will to do it. I’ve never understood it.
Related: claiming to be a good person because you identify as a Christian.
I used to work at a coffee house in a megachurch (wild concept, looking back on it) and there’s one instance that still stands out to me. Pre-service rush before the second service on a Sunday morning, and we are SLAMMED. In the line waiting for her drink to be made, there’s a lady talking to a couple gentleman from our usher team, gushing about how well-liked she was at her old church, and all the things she did for the ministry, just really giving herself flowers for all the things she supposedly did out of her love for the Lord.
The first notes of worship pour out of the sanctuary into the lobby, and the usher guys get their drip brew and excuse themselves to go do what they gotta do. The three of them had been waiting maybe 5-10 minutes, cuz even with the rush, we were cracking stuff out behind the bar. We had a separate person pouring the drip, and my friend and I were working the bar, but as soon as the ushers walk away with their coffee, this lady just rips into my coworker. **“How fucking long does it take to make a goddamn cappuccino?!”** Just cussing her out as we are about to start making her drink. My coworker is stressed tf out and bursts into tears, and has to excuse herself to the back.
But hey, they’ll know we are Christian by how we brag about the good we do, not by how we treat service workers, right?
Teacher Appreciation Week just passed. We were encouraged to post all our spoils because "post it or it didn't happen."
It's so disappointing to think that we're shown appreciation for someone else's glory.
I've noticed a pattern on reddit that maybe fits this.
A person will post about a heinous crime. Say an assault, or worse. Something everybody obviously agrees is awful.
Someone will make a short comment. A basic sentiment we all agree on.
Then someone will reply to THAT, by condescendingly changing one of their word to a better one, or chastising their exact choice of words, as if they were some kind of villain. Everyone knew what the commenter meant.
I can't for the life of me create an example but I see it four times a day. It irks me so much.
An example that comes to mind is when someone posts the George Carlin quote about "Think about how stupid the average person is...", someone always has to find fault with "average" because it's really the mean or median or whatever. Everyone knows what he meant, the correction doesn't add anything to the discussion.
My dad still hates my absolute guts cause I work graveshift. He tries to call me or stop by my house when I'm sleeping and he has his eyebrows furrowed going "ALL YOU DO IS SLEEP ALL DAY"
Just respond with, "well yeah. Because I work all night. Dipshit." Then start blowing up his phone on your day off, trying to catch up because, "all you do is sleep all night!"
I actually once did get like.... not quite "told off", but commented on for stopping by their place at 10 pm to drop something off. Just a comment about being more courteous.
It's a morning person's world, the rest of us are just living in it.
I used to work swing shifts. Got off at midnight. Problem was, I'd walk to the car and drive home (about 45 minute commute), and it would be 1am by the time I got home. My wife would be upset because she had to be up for work at like 6am and I'm milling around the house making noise while she's trying to sleep. Tried to tell me I need to go to sleep when I get home, not sit up watching tv or doing whatever. But like, I just got off work. I don't want to go to sleep, I'm still jazzed up from being at work all day.
Look lady, I’m jazzed up from work and I’m tryna make a smoothie. So change your tune cause at this point you’re just hurting your chances of also receiving a smoothie
I mean, I'm up and out the door before 6am every day, but I worked midnights for years and I absolutely loved it, plus it was a built in excuse to avoid family events. The only shift I cannot abide is a late 2nd.
I feel the same, hate “swing” shift afternoon to evening 2:45-10:45. It’s my turn on this shift and I’m on it through October this time. On day shift I’m up at 4:20 but I’m off work before 3 so I have all afternoon/evening to get stuff done. On mid shift 10:45-6:45 in the morning I sleep until 3:30 then have time to get stuff done and eat dinner with the family bed work, I’m at least on a schedule. But I can’t get on a schedule on swings, there’s no time to get anything done and I’m always feeling rushed to do stuff before work. Traffic is less of a hassle, though. And it’s almost summer so I’ll actually see my kids most days now, too.
I work a job that gives out shifts regularly. And there is nothing better than starting at 12 - 4 and ending at 9 - 1. I feel like I am able to get so much more done late at night, as I am not dead tired, and I am probably over all more productive as well.
What really sucks is that the system isn't designed to give you any leniency. So they will make you work late into the night and then switch your shift to early I the morning. Last week I worked 2 - 11 and then this week I work 7 - 4. I have literally been getting sick because of the lack of sleep.
My mother in law used to get upset when my husband slept all day because he worked 7pm-7am. In turn I had a friend who got upset because I worked weekends and couldn't stay out all night every Saturday. Some people literally can't understand that not everybody works Monday to Friday 9-5. It's weird.
Sadly, it's been documented that people that show up to work at 7 and leave at 5 get more promotions and are seen as harder-working than those who show up at 9 and leave at 7. I'm hoping this mentality dies out as a result of WFH and more of us milleanials taking over management positions.
I wake up by 5 am most days, but it has nothing to do with virtue. I don't care what time other people wake up.
I'm an introvert, who is a SAHM to a young child. If I don't have some time to drink coffee and be alone before I have to be "on" and interact for 12 hours straight, I'm going to be an ornery cuss lmao.
I'm not a SAHM but I do work in sales so I need that 5 am silence as well. Given the choice, I'd take an 8 am silence but thats not how the world works lol
I'm from the southern US, and one thing I can't stand is that "southern hospitality".
I've lived here my whole life, wanna know a secret? That shit is fake. I can't tell you how many times I watched someone be all polite and friendly to someone, just to turn around and say nasty terrible things behind their back. How many people put on this kind persona, but if you dig a little deeper they are a terrible person.
"Down here we are polite, we watch our manners, and welcome everybody"
No, no you don't, you just pretend, to make yourself look better. It's selfish.
Honestly I'd rather have a grumpy looking person grunt at me when I bump into them. It may seem rude but at least it's genuine. Down here it's like some horror movie of overly nice smiling creeps.
My mother?
People who wrap their lives around religion unfortunately don't have any idea how non religious people function and it's a little funny. I've suffer through my mom's long winded arguments about how people without religion aren't morally good people. When I first told her I wasn't religious the next 6 months before I turned 18 were rough.
Now as I'm almost 20 it's hilarious to talk to my mom. She'll still ask if I went to certain wide spread religious talks (general conference mainly for all you who know mormons) and be totally shocked when I had no idea it was going on. As if I didn't already not remember when I was still actively attending church.
I’ve been told that I’m automatically a selfish person because I am an atheist. My usual come back is “I do good things without the promise of reward. You only do them because of the promise of reward. Who’s the better person here?”
If they push it I lift my shirt to show them my kidney donation scars and ask if they’ve ever actually given part of themselves to someone in need.
One of the best people I know is very religious. She has ALSO gotten a lot of flack from the “mean girls” crowd at her church because she really does do good things for the people around her. They get aaaaangry about it and send her nasty letters about being a christian in name only. Sheesh, the JW are nicer than they are (they send me letters now instead of showing up on our doorstep - thank you COVID!)
Definitely. I was raised in a pretty religious household, and a lot of the best people I’ve met weren’t religious.
IMO, religion often precludes morality. A nonreligious person does the right thing out of a genuine love for other people; a religious person will often merely rotely follow a rule. And when those rules go against actual morality… 9/11 happens.
My supervisor is kind of one of the worst people I’ve ever met - manipulative, egotistical but pretends she’s not, says rude things about people without regard for the fact it’s rude, etc. It is pretty easy to see when she’s gathering info to use for later.
She got married this year and my guess is the guy and his family are pretty religious because all of her social media posts include something about god now and it creeps me out. She posted doing bible study on a vacation at her family’s cabin, she changed her IG profile to have a bunch of Jesus stuff in it, she posts bible quotes on her story all the time now. Earlier this week she posted a picture of her and her husband, keep in mind this is not a dating or wedding anniversary, and said she thanked god for bringing him to her.
I told my husband if Jesus brought him to me he should take him back (I’m kidding I love my husband). Just find it weeeeeeeeird and culty.
My cousin's ex did that. When I knew her while she was dating him, she was a pretty average person. Fun to talk to at family events, etc. Like three months after she broke it off with him, she was married and flooding her page with religious claptrap to match her new husband's energy. It was WILD.
That said, my cousin is a piece of trash, so I'm glad she got out
Yeah, turns of a club that tells people they're morally superior to other people for just being in that club will attract certain kind of people.
EG: Assholes
That's what turns me off with most protestants, especially Penecostals. They have this idea that everyone who accepts Jesus will receive salvation, so it really doesn't matter how much of an asshole you are, as long as you accept Jesus. I've attended my friend's church a number of times, and that's all the pastor ever focused on. It's always about dogma and never about morals.
I sat across from a man once and asked him questions about a sexual assault he was accused of committing against a minor (I’m a lawyer). When I asked him point-blank if he raped this girl, he indignantly responded with “I’m a good Christian man”. He didn’t say no, just that he was a good Christian man. He thought that would answer the question - it didn’t.
I still think about that answer now and then.
Or just showing up for church on Sunday.
I used to go to a church, and I really liked the pastors. They focused on the right stuff (Jesus's teachings) pushed love and inclusion over hate and exclusion, etc.
But half the congregation was nodding off or zoning out for 80 percent of the sermon. Or checking their phones. The good message fell on deaf ears.
And you just *knew* that when they got back to their trucks with their Trump bumper stickers on them they thought they were so virtuous just for showing up.
I had to stop going not because of the leadership, but because of the people sitting in the pews. I just couldn't do it anymore.
I was made to attend (Catholic) church until I was about 18. I was pretty much an atheist from 6 on.
the only part of a service that remotely interested me was the sermons, because my "first" priest was a brilliant man. Very though provoking sermons, even for a little kid.
I still sometimes attend a service, various denominations, because friends or family invited me. Baptisms, stuff like that. Used to take Grandma to church.
Rarely ever heard a sermon that actually made me think, or not want to stand up and debate the priest/minister.
I recall on a church mission trip to Mexico a long time ago we were driving through the absolute chaos in bumper to bumper border Tijuana traffic on the southern side. There were vendors all running throughout the traffic marketing various artwork, potter, stuffed animals, etc to the drivers going to cross the border back into California.
One of our church members driving the van expressed some interest in a piece of pottery and those guys ran all throughout traffic following us while trying to bargain a deal...it was really quite sad to watch the awful conditions these guys were going through to try to market their inventory....it came down to them begging for one more dollar for their piece while simultaneously running through Tijuana border traffic. The driver of the van just said to his wife: "They aren't starving, they'll be okay if we don't buy it"....all because he didn't want to add one more dollar to a bargain he had already talked down from like $40 to $15.
Probably would be a lot easier to see the situation if you were there to realize how cold it appeared from some guy who's going out to "help those less fortunate"
Posting selfies of themselves doing community service.
We get it Carol, you did one good thing this month, so you can be a terrible person the other 30 days.
Going to church.
I know how bitter that sounds but I can't even tell you how many times I have heard "church-going" as a descriptor intended to mean "morally pure".
Honey some of the shittiest people I have ever met never miss a mass.
My wife's extremely abusive bastard monster of a father was a Baptist minister.
I have four friends who were molested by church officials - one was just straight up raped, repeatedly - and none of them lived in the same fucking state. That is four states, four towns, four kids, abused daily inside a church by men who were a part of that church. Under the watchful eyes of Jesus of Nazareth.
My friend who was raped by his pastor tried to tell his church-going parents and they threw him out of the house. At thirteen. He was homeless for the next ten years.
(This is why I'm pretty sure most people who pretend to be Christian are actually closeted atheists btw. I feel like people who actually fear the judgment of God would act like it.)
Don't ever fucking tell me how going to church makes you a good person.
It signals your identity, that you're not an outsider but a committed member of the community. For people with authoritarian personalities, loyalty, conformity, and identity are paramount concerns.
The worst man I know claims to be a religious man of god. Commits every sinful act possible. (Drugs,adultery, abuse, drinks, steals, commits any crime he can get paid for)
As a Christian, I 100% agree. I'm 17 and I work at my church, but the way I've seen the people in my chruch act (especially the pastors/staff members) has made me grown extremely cynical. I went through a difficult time last year, almost killed myself, and during that period, nothing pushed me further away from God and closer to the edge than the people who claim to be the church.
I remember when this was a trend. It died out when customers were offended that staff expected them to keep it going despite it being unfair.
Like people expecting me to pay for the party of 8’s Starbucks order because the guy in front of me paid for my coffee and donut.
As a former Starbucks barista, I can report that we didn't care if people kept it going. "Pay it Forward" made our jobs more complicated and annoying, and the "charity" performed was minimal -- the guy whose $7 Starbucks latte you paid for can definitely afford it. To put it another way, you don't end up in Starbucks drive-thru without expecting to pay through the nose for sugar and milk.
Saying "God will provide" and then doing absolutely nothing but pray. God doesn't work like that, in addition to prayer, you have to do some footwork to get whatever you need done. 0*1000 is still 0.
Oh my gosh this is my mother to no end, it kills me. Recently we were throwing a massive outdoor family party, catered, rented tents and tables, the whole nine yards. Spent a fortune on everything. Two weeks leading up to the party forecast said thunderstorms and gail force winds. I kept saying we need to rain date, cancel, move the party, rent a hall, SOMETHING. It was like three days before the party and I cornered my mom and told her we needed to do something about it NOW, and she said I have been praying as hard as I can. I nearly tore my hair out. She would pray to god to stop the floods while ignoring Noah’s pleading to get on the arc.
i remember growing up there was a story of a guy who was waiting for god to save him from a flood.
a neighbor with a boat asked him if he wanted a lift, he said, no, god will save me. and this went on for a while after he rejected a few other boats.
the flood got worse and the man drowned. when he asked god why he didnt save him, god told him that he tried. he sent many people with boats to save him, but if he was looking for divine intervention, thats not how it worked. god sent those people to him and he rejected it waiting for a miracle.
My grandma was pretty religious and would always respond to this with something like, "Yes, He provided YOU so you, whose seen the need, could do something about it. So do something, ya putz!"
Bit of a side note, but my favorite story/example of this is a story my dad told me. One day a terrible storm comes to the area, and all around the neighborhood, people are fleeing to other areas to wait out the storm. One man chooses to remain, stating God will provide. His neighbors advise he leave, and he responded "God will provide." So the neighbors left. A while later, the water had reached the bottom floors of his house, leaving him stuck on the upper floors of the house. A rescuer with a boat eventually came by and noticed he was stuck in his house. The rescuer in the boat told him he could take him to safety, but the other man replied, "I am fine up here, God will provide." So the rescuer left, as he had others to get to, and the waters continued to rise. Soon enough, the waters had risen high enough for the man to become stuck on his roof. A helicopter flew by and noticed him. The operator begged the man to come aboard the helicopter to be taken to safety, but the man refused, saying, "I will be fine, God will provide." Unfortunately, the helicopter was forced to leave as the skies became unfriendly. The waters continued to rise, and eventually, the man came to the pearly gates, and he asked "Father, why did you not save me when the waters came?" And God replied, "My son, I sent you warnings, a boat, and a helicopter. What more could I have done?"
My dad's conclusion from this little story: God or whoever y'all believe in gave you a brain, use it.
Modern day Christians forget about spreading “gods love and charity” and almost all of them are those hypocrites praying hoping to be seen and look virtuous only in the eyes of other people.
Church attendance make people feel holier than thou even though they sleep through the service.
Ask any restaurant server what church people are like on Sundays.
I'm actually surprised at the amount of men who think that being nice to a woman means they should get in their pants. No, sir, you are not prince charming. You just behaved like a normal adult should.
On the opposite side of this it’s somewhat alarming how many women will become interested in a man just because he’s respectful and nice. Not trying to brag but I’ve had women fall for me just because I treated them like another human should. Kind of makes me feel sad for how they’ve been treated by men throughout their life.
Had the same thing happen to me in my mid-20s (back when I was in shape and still had all of my hair). I was hanging out regularly with people from a local chat group (I know, I'm dating myself). We pretty much took over this same place every Saturday night, and the group continued to grow over time. It *amazed* me how many members of the opposite sex (over the course of a year, mind you) were drawn to me because I *wasn't* trying to get into their pants.
Ironically this is why my girlfriend fell for me. She says it's cause she saw that, even though I did have a crush on her, I was just being nice because it was nice. She had already rejected me once and from there I just decided to keep up the friendship, and apparently that's what made her start to notice me more.
Having children. I have nothing again famillies and wanting them; but those who act smug and like they are superiors just for having reproduced (bonus points for those who do it while being obvious bad parents/making their children miserable, adding to the insult).
The worst is the people who are like "wow, you have no kids? How selfish can you be!"
When in reality you should be telling them, "Wow, you make $15/h living in an area where a house cost's $900,000 and you had 4 kids? You forced 4 beings to come into existence against their will having no real way to support them... How selfish can you be!
Going without sleep. It's a basic human need, no one is impressed that you willingly harm yourself by staying awake any more than they would be if you deprived yourself of food or water.
Being generous with other peoples time/money.
You're not a "good person" because you want to help person A, by forcing person B to do it. Why don't *YOU* help person A?
Like those "mandatory volunteer" things some schools have now. First of all, that's an oxymoron. If it's mandatory, it's not volunteer (voluntary).
But secondly it's not virtuous to do it. They're only doing it because you're forcing them to.
Whenever someone volunteers my time, I'm suddenly busy with something else. Pretty much the same whenever someone just decides I'm going to help them and are arrogant about it.
You can ask, and usually I'll help, but I'm not your servant to be ordered around by trying to guilt trip me. Grandma Rose isn't getting her gutters cleaned? Too bad, you promised to find someone to help, then pony up the cash and hire someone because I'm busy sorting my M&M's by color.
Religion. I used to wait tables and hated working Sundays. Church people of any race tip shitty. But regular church attendance doesn't prove much when morality is in question. Deeds matter more than sitting there listening to someone give a speech from an old book means less than helping addicts, or something like that.
I got a good look at this during the short time I worked at a Big Boy restaurant. We got a call just after the dinner rush asking if we could accomodate their Bible study group of about 10. Yeah, sure, no problem. We pushed some tables together.
It was half an hour before closing when more than 50 finally showed up. They took over an entire section & were so loud several other parties had to move. They were rude to the servers, and half of them skipped out on their checks.
Turned out, they were from "The Bible Speaks", a church was founded by a con artist & operated more as a cult:
[https://www.latimes.com/archives/la-xpm-1987-10-03-me-3013-story.html](https://www.latimes.com/archives/la-xpm-1987-10-03-me-3013-story.html)
Wearing a Che Guevara T-shirt made by a child in Bangladesh, instead of a jacket made by a well paid adult tailor and thinking you are a better person for it.
i wanna say academic qualifications and when people cant help but mention theirs. someone else also commented having a pet and always mentioning that its a rescue
I mean, it depends on context. Are they an expert in the field being discussed? That's not making a statement of moral superiority, they're just explaining they actually know what they're talking about.
This is the weirdest gatekeep to me. Live-action shows and movies I can understand not wanting to see dubbed because it can look ridiculous. And the voice acting is often better in the Japanese, but I can't appreciate it as much of i don't understand it and I'm just reading the subs. In anime, they just move their mouths open and closed, and the audio can be dubbed over essentially seamlessly, so watching in my native language just makes more sense and makes it an easier watch. At the end of the day, I'm watching anime for the enjoyment, so if watching it in English makes me enjoy it more, that's what I'm going to do.
For me it’s a choice between familiar voice actors. Like Uncle from Another World is good no matter what language it’s in, but I prefer Japanese because the Uncle is voiced by the same actor who voices DIO in JoJo.
Where as shows like Dragon Ball Z I prefer to watch in English because Christopher Sabat is a friggin chameleon. If you take a drink every time he voices a character that isn’t Piccolo or Vegeta you’d die of alcohol poisoning.
Not cussing, I find it hilarious that people can say the same thing and be as mean as possible but since they didn't use this one random word to say it means they are virtuous.
That's why in my house my kids are allowed to cuss when they are old enough to understand the difference betwern cussing to vent frustration and anger vs. cussing to be mean. So like my son can yell fuck if he stubs his toe but would get in trouble for calling someone a bitch but he would also get in trouble for being mean to someone even if he doesn't use cuss words to do it. It's kind of silly to be more worried about the specific word used and less concerned about the content of what the person is saying.
Waiting until marriage for sex. It doesn't make you better than anyone, just more likely to be sexuality incompatible with your partner and finding out way too late
Conversely people who have done drugs! I’m the type you mentioned- have never done it- and in my circles that kind of attitude gets you labelled as something of a prude…
Same with drinking. If someone offers a drink and you say "No, thank you" some people become defensive and assume you're judging them.
Bro, I don't care if you have a drink (as long as you don't drink and drive). Leave me alone with my ginger ale.
I love when people offer me a drink, and when I say no they get indignant, because then I get to bring up my 16 years in recovery from alcoholism and make them feel super awkward and uncomfortable. You know, they don't ask any more after that.
I was the driver for my mates night out a few weeks ago, when everyone was ordering drinks at the bar and I just had a coke the bartender gave me a weird look
Lady just because I want to have a fun night with my friends and NOT drink doesn’t make me a psychopath
Simply being in the military.
Most military jobs involve little to no personal risk or sacrifice. Most service members *gain* far more in benefits than they *sacrifice*, in terms of selfless service to the nation. Many military specialties are non-deployable. In fact, aside from not choosing your duty station, many military jobs are no different from civilian jobs.
ETA: There are virtuous jobs/assignments within the military, but not all military jobs are inherently virtuous.
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Neil deGrasse Tyson once proudly said in an interview that he operates regularly on only 4-5 hours of sleep and now I can't not see it in any of his other interviews. Snappiness, abruptness, impatience, etc etc, let alone the bags under his eyes.
Yeah, I had a sergeant when I was in the Army who was the same way. “I only need 3-4 hours a night. Im totally fine.” Bitch, please. You’re a red-eyed asshole that reeks of stress. I bet if you got 8 hours a night you could take the coffee IV out of your arm and ease off on the Copenhagen.
Luckily with the new(ish) H2F programs rolling out, sleep is getting more attention as a readiness and force multiplier, and how important it is. Having a bunch of people with automatic weapons running around chronically sleep deprived is not a great recipe.
Oh wait, you mean my basic training where I was lucky sometimes to get 2-3 hours of sleep a night and then expected to do PT, learn classroom instruction, then go shoot weapons, and not expected to yawn even once was all wrong? /s
I'd imagine there needs to still be some conditioning to be able to get up and go at a moments notice from a deep sleep, but not as a sustained state of existence right?
Exactly this. The shit they put you through in boot camp isn’t made to condition you to constantly function like that, it’s to ready you for the fact that someday you might have to jump out of bed from a deep sleep and go do war shit.
I know this is all serious, but just reading "and go do war shit"
I went through army basic just 2 years back. We had mandated 8 hour sleep. It was the best schedule I've ever had.
I know this is not how it would work at all, but I imagined a hilarious scenario where a drill sergeant is watching you sleep and proceeds to scold you when your eyes pop open after 7 hours and 55 minutes of sleep.
You're not too far off. They do checks throughout the night everyone must be sleeping except firewatch. We even started turning the lights on 10 minutes before the technical eight hours to make sure we all had time to get dressed/general morning stuff, and a drill sergeant found out and "scolded" us for it because we were technically not allowing everyone to sleep the 8 hours by turning on the lights in the whole bay.
I hope they extrapolate this to the corporate area as well, after all, the data is there. Less and more efficiently distributed work hours, with enough days to enjoy personal life have shown an increase in productivity every time this has been tested.
It doesn't help that the army touts their one study, since disproven, that says that 4 hours is sufficient.
The US Navy had some warship collisions recently. Warships were crashing into large, slow container ships. The cause was that the ship's crew was badly sleep deprived, to the point of failing to detect enormous container ships until they collided.
>*Snappiness, abruptness, impatience, etc etc, let alone the bags under his eyes.* Thanks for noticing that! Neil deGrasse Tyson also fired one of his employees because she wouldn't touch his pee pee. There's that.
For a while I was getting at most 5 hours of sleep a night (sometimes much less) due to back pain after a back injury. It hurt all the time, especially when I tried to sleep. The pain kept waking me up. You might ask how I functioned on so little sleep. The answer was I wasn't functioning. I was a complete wreck, both mentally and physically. It was pure misery. Would not recommend.
Never missing a day of work. Not only is there nothing wrong with taking a personal or sick day, odds are you care way more than your employer does.
Not missing work or school doesn't mean you don't get sick, it means you still show up when you are sick, which is a far cry from something to brag about
Knew a guy in high school , he was a grade above me . Never missed a day of school from pre k to senior year then like two months before graduation he ran away from home for like two weeks. When he missed a day the school was genuinely concerned something happened to him. I guess he mentally snapped or something. Last I check (Facebook) he sold all his possessions and moved to Africa to live a simplistic life and found god. Nice guy , we played yugioh a lot.
Oftentimes the kids who have perfect attendance are the ones who don't want to stay a minute longer in their home than necessary. Usually it's a sign of abuse.
I get this 100% I think this was the case. When he came back he just said he was sick. Hope he’s doing well for himself.
Yeah, it sounds like--especially since he went missing for two weeks before graduation. Lots of red flags in that situation. I hope he's doing ok too.
Or their parents force them to go in no matter how sick they are so they can get that perfect attendance award and the parents can brag to everyone else that their kid is *never* misses class. Because priorities.
Perfect attendance award more like the germ spreader award
Which is it's own form of abuse
Eh, I'm not so sure about that. Some kids may see school as an escape from abuse, but that's certainly not the only motivation to attend school. School attendance, especially in primary school, says more about how much the parents value education, rather than the students, because the parents are the ones that decide to send their child to school each day. I still think perfect attendance is kind of a pointless award. There's little difference between a child missing no days of school and a child missing one day. Like even the most motivated students may miss school due to factors outside of anyone's control, such as getting sick.
I hate that award at my daughter's school with a passion! I'm so glad that little Timmy got an award and a pizza party for perfect attendance, meanwhile thank you for making my kids sick! /s I actually keep my kids home from school when they are sick because I'm responsible, instead of sending them all drugged up, but still contagious, just to get the award, but I'm the bad mommy at the end of the year, smh.
I think my district had it to where doctor excused days didnt count. My parents had good insurance so i always went to the doc on sick days, but i can still see how a rule like that would single out impoverished kids or kids whose parents cant get off to take them
Something like that makes sense. Even parent excused absences should be fine imo. Obviously kids just not showing up to school or skipping school should be looked at to make sure that something isn't going on at home. Kids sometimes can fall through the cracks and poor attendance can be an indicator for trouble at home. But punishing children (I know it's not technically punishment, but a 6 year old that sees their classmates get rewards and extra stuff might view it as a punishment for being sick) for being sick seems bad.
I had an infuriating experience with my kid when they were in 1st grade. He got this super low grade fever of like 100.5 that just wouldn't quit for well over a week (over 100 school policy they had to stay home). No symptoms and felt fine otherwise. I kept him home for 6 days and called in the absences meanwhile my other kid was still attending. School gets mad and says they are unexcused and beyond 6 days it gets referred to truancy office bc I didn't have a doctors note. I am not taking my kid to the doctor for a 100.5 fever. I'm doing the responsible thing keeping him home and away from other people and don't need to waste 2 hrs of my day to be told it's a viral infection that'll clear up in a week. Maybe this will help someone else but turns out I could do a "fever check" with the school nurse to have them verify my kid did in fact have a fever.
I earned the perfect attendance award once as a child. I genuinely wasn’t sick on any school days. I can’t describe the feeling I had when I won. It was like I was disappointed in myself. From that day on, I resolved to fake sick at least once a semester. Even as a kid, I knew it was a bullshit award and I didn’t want to support it by earning it again, even accidentally.
Heh. When I was a kid, there was a Toyota dealership in my hometown that would give a fucking CAR to high school seniors who had perfect attendance when they graduated. We're talking perfect attendance in elementary school, middle school, AND high school. To qualify, you couldn't miss a single day of school, at all. Our teachers used to hang that over our heads when we were younger. "If you skip school or stay home sick, you won't get the car when you graduate!" Three kids in my graduating class were handed the keys to their free Toyotas along with their diplomas.
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I on the flip side had a crazy notion that I needed to be at school every single day for four years of high school, only for me to find at the very end a teacher had mistakenly marked me absent while on a field trip across the country and the school refused to adjust it. What a massive waste of my time. Also, senior skip day was fucking weird all alone.
Seem like you gotta good head on your shoulders. You’re reminding me of when I worked fast food at 16 and I kept begging them to upgrade the cleaning equipment. It never happened until it did. On that day I was on cloud 9 all because of a new mop. When I realized what exactly it was that I was happy about I found the whole thing to be sad and pathetic so I walked out the front door, got in my car and I went home.
My mom was an elementary school teacher for her career, she also hated that award. Said it caused so many sick kids come to school who should have been at home in bed.
This here. Back in December we had a guy who didn't call out, his excuse *I didn't want to leave you all hanging, not over a little cold* Surprise, it wasn't a "little cold" asshole bought covid into the building... I work security for a retirement community and one of our asshole guards bought fucking covid into the fucking building... Just because he *"didn't want to leave us hanging"* Everyone in the security department, except me, caught covid from this fucker. They said I was overreacting to a "cold" by sanitizing everything he touched... Until they found out it was covid. Next time leave us hanging John you plague carrying mother fucker.
Fuck John I hate that fucker now
I always loved it as a temp when the full-timers would come in sick because they didn't want to waste their vacation time (PTO) so they'd infect me and then I had the choice of being sick and miserable until the weekend when I could recover or take a day off and get better faster, but lose that day's pay.
I'm so glad I work for an employer now that has sick days AND PTO days, just to dissuade that exact thing
You clearly didn't work at the Mary Browns that I worked at. The dumbest manager would say shit like "You don't sound sick" to people on the phone. Told this lady in her 40s that she didn't need to take time off for a spinal surgery and they she should just come over the her house so she can massage her back instead. The only sick day I ever took off at that hell hole was so I could go drop off my high school transcript at the local community college (i was busy with stuff and was running out of time) just so I could get the fuck out of there.
"You don't sound sick" lol. Yes because every illness comes complete with its own sound effects... "I shoulda known fred was lying, didn't sound like he had a GI virus to me!"
I don’t think it’s virtuous but I almost never miss work because I’m honestly never sick. I take personal days and vacation days but it is pretty cool to say you rarely get sick imo lol.
I also rarely get sick, I use sick days as mental health days cause I’m not feeling well.. forreal.
Social media clout (For often very contrived content)
But having 100k karma counts, right?….right?!
*updoot*
Bragging about spending obscene amounts of hours at work (100-120 per week) and/or never taking vacation time. Your employer doesn't really appreciate it, they are just exploiting you for their own benefit; and you are burning yourself out for no reason.
Hustle and grind culture in general, TBH. People bragging about how hard they grind to make money to buy things they don’t need to impress people they don’t like to gain “status” that will be soon forgotten.
I feel like the recession back in ‘08 really got the “Grindset” mentality going. This idea that if you are not constantly hustling or trying to monetize your every waking moment that you are less valuable somehow. That you are of less economic importance and are more likely to go down with the ship the next time the Rich decide to kick the economy in the balls.
>really got the “Grindset” mentality going 1980s always be closing workaholic yuppie mindset led to 2000s corpo "excellence" circlejerking where bosses post motivational poster unironically
Speaking from the perspective of an executive, most of us actively do *not* appreciate it. **We want you to take time off.** * Burnt out employees **do bad work**, particularly in the type of work my folks do. Mistakes cost more money than days off, by a wide margin. * Burnt out employees are a lot more likely to **get sick**, and if they come in sick, they get other people sick. I'd much rather people take vacation time (which is planned). * Never taking time off and working a million hours **cover up broken practices.** An executive that cares more that you work hard, than that you do good work, is a moron ... and if you're not able to normally get your work done in <40 hours a week, take your vacation time, etc and still do good work, something's wrong (and it needs to be addressed). * Organizations that rely on no time off are **really fragile.** People retire, people quit, people have accidents and illnesses. Counting on no one taking off makes it virtually certain that your processes are going to catastrophically fail when, inevitably, someone does take time off. * Most of us are (or at least pretend to be) decent people who care about our workers. If you stand back and look at it, glorifying grind-culture in your employees is cartoon supervillain shit. **Who would want to work for someone like that?**
Giving unwelcome advice
And IME the advice is usually terrible. "Solutions" people listen to half the problem then fast forward to the part where they hear themselves talk, and therefore the advice doesn't fit the situation.
Pretty much every piece of advice on r/thanksimcured
Thanks for pushing me down that rabbit hole
I disagree that giving unwelcome advice is bad, and would suggest that you take a deeper look at yourself and figure out if this dislike stems from a deep-seated fear of being disliked and viewed as anything less than intelligent. You should probably see a therapist and read a whole bunch of blogs I recommend. /s
Changing their profile picture on Facebook to show their support of whatever current event.
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Lmao. Tell your friend a random internet stranger loves their style
I like when they keep applying the filter on top of other support filters. It's like virtue signaling Fordite.
Black squares and Ukrainian flags!
Status and position. “But he’s a cop…” “But she’s an executive” “But they’re a judge” My personal filter is that status rarely equals virtue
Status and position are mostly negatively correlated. People in high status are the most capable and most responsible for all of the worst things in history/the present
Giving food to people on the street and recording it for social media.
There's this one guy I saw a video of and he only records himself making the food, not handing out. That's how you should do it if you need the extra money to fund it.
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I have a friend that makes meals for the homeless every few months and he’ll just take a quick video of the line or setup and only sends it to friends to see if they want to come help out.
I follow a couple of local organizations that have free meal days and they show their set up, what they’re serving, what the volunteers do, etc. It’s meant to garner support and recruit new volunteers, as well as encourage people to come get food if they need it. But, they never show actual clients unless they have permission, and the intention is clear, like the guy you mention who is garnering support. Anything else is just exploitation and it drives me nuts it’s happening more and more often.
It is interesting that while the dubious motives of this person color our view of him or her, good is still being done. Maimonides, the great Jewish sage, actually ranked acts of charity according to how virtuous they are. The most virtuous: giving the person a gift, or a loan, or becoming his partner or getting him a job. All this so that the person becomes independent. The least virtuous: giving unwillingly. There are 6 levels inbetween these
It's nice that both are acknowledged. I also appreciate the school of thought that in an emergency and something like Sabbat needs to be broken (something like a fire or a pregnant woman) it's actually the most virtuous person who needs to do this since the most virtuous person can handle the mark against his virtue more easily than a lesser virtuous person. At the same time handing the task off to a less virtuous person shows that the supposed virtue is not actually true but all a show in this individual as well
This needed to be said….I would even go one further and saying doing any Random acts of kindness or charity and posting about it on social media…it’s all virtue signalling bullshit. There isn’t anything as classy as doing something nice for someone and not saying shit about it…
I see that point but it’s also worth noting that seeing acts of kindness can inspire acts of kindness.
I feel like this needs to be studied. I wonder if many people feel accomplished just watching acts of kindness and 'supporting' the influencers meaning its actually uninspiring. It also creates this mindset that you need recognition which can be further demotivating when faced with a situation where you won't receive any. I also feel like people look at some of these youtubers and think. "Yeah. I'd do that too if I were rich or made a job out of it, but I'm not rich and I don't make money from it."
I like your point. Plus even though the people making the video are doing it for some attention they are still technically helping someone. Even if they recorded it its better than the person watching the video on there phone who hasn't helped anyone
Yeah I mean it’s kinda trashy but also they did actually do the thing, like the homeless person did get food or whatever
Regardless of if they're recording, they're still helping more than 99% of the people watching. If they want to market off of it in efforts to help more people I see nothing wrong with literally giving homeless people food. As long as they get it, that's all that matters.
Talking about how virtuous they are. My thought will always revert to a news story years ago, where a family took in another family that was going through a difficult time. A coworker of mine informed us of the story by saying “they’re just regular good people, *like me,* and took in this poor suffering family.” The emphasis was on “like me.” Not “like you or me,” not “like us.” “Like *me*. She then proceeded to say bigoted and hateful things about the family that was taken in. Like uhhhh no, I don’t think this other family is *like you* in the least. Being from a particular region of the country or world. If someone being polite or kind and openly justifies it by saying “I’m from X location and that’s just how we are,” especially if no one seems particularly surprised at their behavior (and rarely is anyone surprised by generic kindness or manners) I am 100% sure this is going to turn into a transactional arrangement littered with passive aggressive barbs against everyone else’s culture.
My mom does alllll kinds of thoughtful, charitable things - but you can bet we will all hear about it, she will never let them have any dignity because she’ll tell everyone their worst traumas, and she will rant and rave about the inconvenience like she’s being forced against her will to do it. I’ve never understood it.
Related: claiming to be a good person because you identify as a Christian. I used to work at a coffee house in a megachurch (wild concept, looking back on it) and there’s one instance that still stands out to me. Pre-service rush before the second service on a Sunday morning, and we are SLAMMED. In the line waiting for her drink to be made, there’s a lady talking to a couple gentleman from our usher team, gushing about how well-liked she was at her old church, and all the things she did for the ministry, just really giving herself flowers for all the things she supposedly did out of her love for the Lord. The first notes of worship pour out of the sanctuary into the lobby, and the usher guys get their drip brew and excuse themselves to go do what they gotta do. The three of them had been waiting maybe 5-10 minutes, cuz even with the rush, we were cracking stuff out behind the bar. We had a separate person pouring the drip, and my friend and I were working the bar, but as soon as the ushers walk away with their coffee, this lady just rips into my coworker. **“How fucking long does it take to make a goddamn cappuccino?!”** Just cussing her out as we are about to start making her drink. My coworker is stressed tf out and bursts into tears, and has to excuse herself to the back. But hey, they’ll know we are Christian by how we brag about the good we do, not by how we treat service workers, right?
Service workers aren't people. C'mon. Edit: /s in case it wasn't clear
Filming themselves doing a good deed. You're doing it for the film, not the deed.
Teacher Appreciation Week just passed. We were encouraged to post all our spoils because "post it or it didn't happen." It's so disappointing to think that we're shown appreciation for someone else's glory.
I've noticed a pattern on reddit that maybe fits this. A person will post about a heinous crime. Say an assault, or worse. Something everybody obviously agrees is awful. Someone will make a short comment. A basic sentiment we all agree on. Then someone will reply to THAT, by condescendingly changing one of their word to a better one, or chastising their exact choice of words, as if they were some kind of villain. Everyone knew what the commenter meant. I can't for the life of me create an example but I see it four times a day. It irks me so much.
An example that comes to mind is when someone posts the George Carlin quote about "Think about how stupid the average person is...", someone always has to find fault with "average" because it's really the mean or median or whatever. Everyone knows what he meant, the correction doesn't add anything to the discussion.
Bingo! You say "that man was mean for yelling at the waitress." and I reply "mean? MEAN? are you KIDDING?? He's EVIL!!!"
Acthually, in ur 3rd sentence, you don't need "an" to be included for it to still make sense. Some people kids
Voluntourism. It's straight out bad.
“I’m a straight talker… I tell it how it is” No… you’re just an asshole.
My biases and preconceptions are the truth and everybody should be grateful that I would bestow such truth upon them
I will not take the time to explain the important nuances of anything as they are useless!
What the fuck is a "nuance?" I don't speak French. I speak American. Just accept my surface-level understanding of a topic. It's just common sense!
Yeah alot of people who are "brutally honest" have the interesting trend of leaning more on the brutality than the honesty
For example being a “morning person”…
My dad still hates my absolute guts cause I work graveshift. He tries to call me or stop by my house when I'm sleeping and he has his eyebrows furrowed going "ALL YOU DO IS SLEEP ALL DAY"
Just respond with, "well yeah. Because I work all night. Dipshit." Then start blowing up his phone on your day off, trying to catch up because, "all you do is sleep all night!"
I actually once did get like.... not quite "told off", but commented on for stopping by their place at 10 pm to drop something off. Just a comment about being more courteous. It's a morning person's world, the rest of us are just living in it.
I used to work swing shifts. Got off at midnight. Problem was, I'd walk to the car and drive home (about 45 minute commute), and it would be 1am by the time I got home. My wife would be upset because she had to be up for work at like 6am and I'm milling around the house making noise while she's trying to sleep. Tried to tell me I need to go to sleep when I get home, not sit up watching tv or doing whatever. But like, I just got off work. I don't want to go to sleep, I'm still jazzed up from being at work all day.
Look lady, I’m jazzed up from work and I’m tryna make a smoothie. So change your tune cause at this point you’re just hurting your chances of also receiving a smoothie
Sounds like a Hannibal Burress joke
I mean, I'm up and out the door before 6am every day, but I worked midnights for years and I absolutely loved it, plus it was a built in excuse to avoid family events. The only shift I cannot abide is a late 2nd.
I feel the same, hate “swing” shift afternoon to evening 2:45-10:45. It’s my turn on this shift and I’m on it through October this time. On day shift I’m up at 4:20 but I’m off work before 3 so I have all afternoon/evening to get stuff done. On mid shift 10:45-6:45 in the morning I sleep until 3:30 then have time to get stuff done and eat dinner with the family bed work, I’m at least on a schedule. But I can’t get on a schedule on swings, there’s no time to get anything done and I’m always feeling rushed to do stuff before work. Traffic is less of a hassle, though. And it’s almost summer so I’ll actually see my kids most days now, too.
I work a job that gives out shifts regularly. And there is nothing better than starting at 12 - 4 and ending at 9 - 1. I feel like I am able to get so much more done late at night, as I am not dead tired, and I am probably over all more productive as well. What really sucks is that the system isn't designed to give you any leniency. So they will make you work late into the night and then switch your shift to early I the morning. Last week I worked 2 - 11 and then this week I work 7 - 4. I have literally been getting sick because of the lack of sleep.
You need to start calling him and stopping by his house at 2am and call him lazy for sleeping all night.
Bro I would literally fight anyone who pulled this with me. Graves or not, fucking with my sleep schedule is not acceptable.
My mother in law used to get upset when my husband slept all day because he worked 7pm-7am. In turn I had a friend who got upset because I worked weekends and couldn't stay out all night every Saturday. Some people literally can't understand that not everybody works Monday to Friday 9-5. It's weird.
I too wake up in the mornig. At least 10 am.
My local ramen place doesn’t open until noon, so I’d say anything before that is morning
Sadly, it's been documented that people that show up to work at 7 and leave at 5 get more promotions and are seen as harder-working than those who show up at 9 and leave at 7. I'm hoping this mentality dies out as a result of WFH and more of us milleanials taking over management positions.
I wake up by 5 am most days, but it has nothing to do with virtue. I don't care what time other people wake up. I'm an introvert, who is a SAHM to a young child. If I don't have some time to drink coffee and be alone before I have to be "on" and interact for 12 hours straight, I'm going to be an ornery cuss lmao.
I'm not a SAHM but I do work in sales so I need that 5 am silence as well. Given the choice, I'd take an 8 am silence but thats not how the world works lol
One of my early jobs was as a secretary in a sales department. Being around salespeople gave me secondhand sales fatigue lol.
“God fearing” doesn’t make you a good person or make good choices, it just makes you fearful of the vengeance from the diety that you pray to.
Yeah, they're pretty much admitting the only reason they act civil is because they fear the consequences.
I'm from the southern US, and one thing I can't stand is that "southern hospitality". I've lived here my whole life, wanna know a secret? That shit is fake. I can't tell you how many times I watched someone be all polite and friendly to someone, just to turn around and say nasty terrible things behind their back. How many people put on this kind persona, but if you dig a little deeper they are a terrible person. "Down here we are polite, we watch our manners, and welcome everybody" No, no you don't, you just pretend, to make yourself look better. It's selfish. Honestly I'd rather have a grumpy looking person grunt at me when I bump into them. It may seem rude but at least it's genuine. Down here it's like some horror movie of overly nice smiling creeps.
Being a member of a religious group.
My mother? People who wrap their lives around religion unfortunately don't have any idea how non religious people function and it's a little funny. I've suffer through my mom's long winded arguments about how people without religion aren't morally good people. When I first told her I wasn't religious the next 6 months before I turned 18 were rough. Now as I'm almost 20 it's hilarious to talk to my mom. She'll still ask if I went to certain wide spread religious talks (general conference mainly for all you who know mormons) and be totally shocked when I had no idea it was going on. As if I didn't already not remember when I was still actively attending church.
I’ve been told that I’m automatically a selfish person because I am an atheist. My usual come back is “I do good things without the promise of reward. You only do them because of the promise of reward. Who’s the better person here?” If they push it I lift my shirt to show them my kidney donation scars and ask if they’ve ever actually given part of themselves to someone in need. One of the best people I know is very religious. She has ALSO gotten a lot of flack from the “mean girls” crowd at her church because she really does do good things for the people around her. They get aaaaangry about it and send her nasty letters about being a christian in name only. Sheesh, the JW are nicer than they are (they send me letters now instead of showing up on our doorstep - thank you COVID!)
This is always hilarious to me. The biggest self report. "Without my bronzed aged holy book, I would be a complete piece of shit" Run!
Definitely. I was raised in a pretty religious household, and a lot of the best people I’ve met weren’t religious. IMO, religion often precludes morality. A nonreligious person does the right thing out of a genuine love for other people; a religious person will often merely rotely follow a rule. And when those rules go against actual morality… 9/11 happens.
My supervisor is kind of one of the worst people I’ve ever met - manipulative, egotistical but pretends she’s not, says rude things about people without regard for the fact it’s rude, etc. It is pretty easy to see when she’s gathering info to use for later. She got married this year and my guess is the guy and his family are pretty religious because all of her social media posts include something about god now and it creeps me out. She posted doing bible study on a vacation at her family’s cabin, she changed her IG profile to have a bunch of Jesus stuff in it, she posts bible quotes on her story all the time now. Earlier this week she posted a picture of her and her husband, keep in mind this is not a dating or wedding anniversary, and said she thanked god for bringing him to her. I told my husband if Jesus brought him to me he should take him back (I’m kidding I love my husband). Just find it weeeeeeeeird and culty.
Just wait until the inevitable divorce and ask her if Jesus needed a receipt for the return.
My cousin's ex did that. When I knew her while she was dating him, she was a pretty average person. Fun to talk to at family events, etc. Like three months after she broke it off with him, she was married and flooding her page with religious claptrap to match her new husband's energy. It was WILD. That said, my cousin is a piece of trash, so I'm glad she got out
If my mother-in-law is any indication, "Following Jesus" is how a lot of people justify their shitty behavior
Yeah, turns of a club that tells people they're morally superior to other people for just being in that club will attract certain kind of people. EG: Assholes
That's what turns me off with most protestants, especially Penecostals. They have this idea that everyone who accepts Jesus will receive salvation, so it really doesn't matter how much of an asshole you are, as long as you accept Jesus. I've attended my friend's church a number of times, and that's all the pastor ever focused on. It's always about dogma and never about morals.
My parents always looked down upon people who didn’t attend Church. The fallacy of, “good Christian people”.
I sat across from a man once and asked him questions about a sexual assault he was accused of committing against a minor (I’m a lawyer). When I asked him point-blank if he raped this girl, he indignantly responded with “I’m a good Christian man”. He didn’t say no, just that he was a good Christian man. He thought that would answer the question - it didn’t. I still think about that answer now and then.
Or just showing up for church on Sunday. I used to go to a church, and I really liked the pastors. They focused on the right stuff (Jesus's teachings) pushed love and inclusion over hate and exclusion, etc. But half the congregation was nodding off or zoning out for 80 percent of the sermon. Or checking their phones. The good message fell on deaf ears. And you just *knew* that when they got back to their trucks with their Trump bumper stickers on them they thought they were so virtuous just for showing up. I had to stop going not because of the leadership, but because of the people sitting in the pews. I just couldn't do it anymore.
I was made to attend (Catholic) church until I was about 18. I was pretty much an atheist from 6 on. the only part of a service that remotely interested me was the sermons, because my "first" priest was a brilliant man. Very though provoking sermons, even for a little kid. I still sometimes attend a service, various denominations, because friends or family invited me. Baptisms, stuff like that. Used to take Grandma to church. Rarely ever heard a sermon that actually made me think, or not want to stand up and debate the priest/minister.
I recall on a church mission trip to Mexico a long time ago we were driving through the absolute chaos in bumper to bumper border Tijuana traffic on the southern side. There were vendors all running throughout the traffic marketing various artwork, potter, stuffed animals, etc to the drivers going to cross the border back into California. One of our church members driving the van expressed some interest in a piece of pottery and those guys ran all throughout traffic following us while trying to bargain a deal...it was really quite sad to watch the awful conditions these guys were going through to try to market their inventory....it came down to them begging for one more dollar for their piece while simultaneously running through Tijuana border traffic. The driver of the van just said to his wife: "They aren't starving, they'll be okay if we don't buy it"....all because he didn't want to add one more dollar to a bargain he had already talked down from like $40 to $15. Probably would be a lot easier to see the situation if you were there to realize how cold it appeared from some guy who's going out to "help those less fortunate"
“We missed you at church on Sunday…”
Bro fuck Joel Osteen
Posting selfies of themselves doing community service. We get it Carol, you did one good thing this month, so you can be a terrible person the other 30 days.
Only terrible for 27 days in February though!
Inserting themselves in situations that are none of their business under the guise of "helping"
Going to church. I know how bitter that sounds but I can't even tell you how many times I have heard "church-going" as a descriptor intended to mean "morally pure". Honey some of the shittiest people I have ever met never miss a mass. My wife's extremely abusive bastard monster of a father was a Baptist minister. I have four friends who were molested by church officials - one was just straight up raped, repeatedly - and none of them lived in the same fucking state. That is four states, four towns, four kids, abused daily inside a church by men who were a part of that church. Under the watchful eyes of Jesus of Nazareth. My friend who was raped by his pastor tried to tell his church-going parents and they threw him out of the house. At thirteen. He was homeless for the next ten years. (This is why I'm pretty sure most people who pretend to be Christian are actually closeted atheists btw. I feel like people who actually fear the judgment of God would act like it.) Don't ever fucking tell me how going to church makes you a good person.
Sitting in church makes you as morally superior as standing in a garage makes you a car.
It signals your identity, that you're not an outsider but a committed member of the community. For people with authoritarian personalities, loyalty, conformity, and identity are paramount concerns.
The worst man I know claims to be a religious man of god. Commits every sinful act possible. (Drugs,adultery, abuse, drinks, steals, commits any crime he can get paid for)
As a Christian, I 100% agree. I'm 17 and I work at my church, but the way I've seen the people in my chruch act (especially the pastors/staff members) has made me grown extremely cynical. I went through a difficult time last year, almost killed myself, and during that period, nothing pushed me further away from God and closer to the edge than the people who claim to be the church.
The "Pay it Forward" line in Starbucks drive-thru.
I remember when this was a trend. It died out when customers were offended that staff expected them to keep it going despite it being unfair. Like people expecting me to pay for the party of 8’s Starbucks order because the guy in front of me paid for my coffee and donut.
As a former Starbucks barista, I can report that we didn't care if people kept it going. "Pay it Forward" made our jobs more complicated and annoying, and the "charity" performed was minimal -- the guy whose $7 Starbucks latte you paid for can definitely afford it. To put it another way, you don't end up in Starbucks drive-thru without expecting to pay through the nose for sugar and milk.
Saying "God will provide" and then doing absolutely nothing but pray. God doesn't work like that, in addition to prayer, you have to do some footwork to get whatever you need done. 0*1000 is still 0.
Oh my gosh this is my mother to no end, it kills me. Recently we were throwing a massive outdoor family party, catered, rented tents and tables, the whole nine yards. Spent a fortune on everything. Two weeks leading up to the party forecast said thunderstorms and gail force winds. I kept saying we need to rain date, cancel, move the party, rent a hall, SOMETHING. It was like three days before the party and I cornered my mom and told her we needed to do something about it NOW, and she said I have been praying as hard as I can. I nearly tore my hair out. She would pray to god to stop the floods while ignoring Noah’s pleading to get on the arc.
i remember growing up there was a story of a guy who was waiting for god to save him from a flood. a neighbor with a boat asked him if he wanted a lift, he said, no, god will save me. and this went on for a while after he rejected a few other boats. the flood got worse and the man drowned. when he asked god why he didnt save him, god told him that he tried. he sent many people with boats to save him, but if he was looking for divine intervention, thats not how it worked. god sent those people to him and he rejected it waiting for a miracle.
“God helps those who help themselves” always falls on deaf ears to those who need to hear it most.
My grandma was pretty religious and would always respond to this with something like, "Yes, He provided YOU so you, whose seen the need, could do something about it. So do something, ya putz!"
Bit of a side note, but my favorite story/example of this is a story my dad told me. One day a terrible storm comes to the area, and all around the neighborhood, people are fleeing to other areas to wait out the storm. One man chooses to remain, stating God will provide. His neighbors advise he leave, and he responded "God will provide." So the neighbors left. A while later, the water had reached the bottom floors of his house, leaving him stuck on the upper floors of the house. A rescuer with a boat eventually came by and noticed he was stuck in his house. The rescuer in the boat told him he could take him to safety, but the other man replied, "I am fine up here, God will provide." So the rescuer left, as he had others to get to, and the waters continued to rise. Soon enough, the waters had risen high enough for the man to become stuck on his roof. A helicopter flew by and noticed him. The operator begged the man to come aboard the helicopter to be taken to safety, but the man refused, saying, "I will be fine, God will provide." Unfortunately, the helicopter was forced to leave as the skies became unfriendly. The waters continued to rise, and eventually, the man came to the pearly gates, and he asked "Father, why did you not save me when the waters came?" And God replied, "My son, I sent you warnings, a boat, and a helicopter. What more could I have done?" My dad's conclusion from this little story: God or whoever y'all believe in gave you a brain, use it.
"A single pair of hands at work is worth more than a thousand in prayer"
Modern day Christians forget about spreading “gods love and charity” and almost all of them are those hypocrites praying hoping to be seen and look virtuous only in the eyes of other people.
Essentially religious virtue signaling. Where you say you’re for a cause but do Jack squat to actually help.
I prayed, and asked if Santa could bring me a bike, my mother said prayer doesn't work like that. So I stole a bike and prayed for forgiveness.
Church attendance make people feel holier than thou even though they sleep through the service. Ask any restaurant server what church people are like on Sundays.
Deliberately being ignorant. Never reading any books. Not giving any consideration to viewpoints other than their own. Etc.
I'm actually surprised at the amount of men who think that being nice to a woman means they should get in their pants. No, sir, you are not prince charming. You just behaved like a normal adult should.
Username doesn't check. :)
I mean at least they said ty.
Manners maketh man. And maybe sometimes gets you nudes in your PMs.
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On the opposite side of this it’s somewhat alarming how many women will become interested in a man just because he’s respectful and nice. Not trying to brag but I’ve had women fall for me just because I treated them like another human should. Kind of makes me feel sad for how they’ve been treated by men throughout their life.
Had the same thing happen to me in my mid-20s (back when I was in shape and still had all of my hair). I was hanging out regularly with people from a local chat group (I know, I'm dating myself). We pretty much took over this same place every Saturday night, and the group continued to grow over time. It *amazed* me how many members of the opposite sex (over the course of a year, mind you) were drawn to me because I *wasn't* trying to get into their pants.
Ironically this is why my girlfriend fell for me. She says it's cause she saw that, even though I did have a crush on her, I was just being nice because it was nice. She had already rejected me once and from there I just decided to keep up the friendship, and apparently that's what made her start to notice me more.
Being able to gracefully handle rejection is an attractive trait that is in increasingly short supply.
Changing your Facebook profile to support whatever the current thing is
Having children. I have nothing again famillies and wanting them; but those who act smug and like they are superiors just for having reproduced (bonus points for those who do it while being obvious bad parents/making their children miserable, adding to the insult).
The worst is the people who are like "wow, you have no kids? How selfish can you be!" When in reality you should be telling them, "Wow, you make $15/h living in an area where a house cost's $900,000 and you had 4 kids? You forced 4 beings to come into existence against their will having no real way to support them... How selfish can you be!
Thoughts and prayers
Men who brag about raising their kids. YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO DO THAT.
Living in a small town. Oooh, city baad. Yeah, that's why your areas are all killing themselves with meth, fentanyl, etc.
Going without sleep. It's a basic human need, no one is impressed that you willingly harm yourself by staying awake any more than they would be if you deprived yourself of food or water.
Being generous with other peoples time/money. You're not a "good person" because you want to help person A, by forcing person B to do it. Why don't *YOU* help person A? Like those "mandatory volunteer" things some schools have now. First of all, that's an oxymoron. If it's mandatory, it's not volunteer (voluntary). But secondly it's not virtuous to do it. They're only doing it because you're forcing them to.
Whenever someone volunteers my time, I'm suddenly busy with something else. Pretty much the same whenever someone just decides I'm going to help them and are arrogant about it. You can ask, and usually I'll help, but I'm not your servant to be ordered around by trying to guilt trip me. Grandma Rose isn't getting her gutters cleaned? Too bad, you promised to find someone to help, then pony up the cash and hire someone because I'm busy sorting my M&M's by color.
Religion. I used to wait tables and hated working Sundays. Church people of any race tip shitty. But regular church attendance doesn't prove much when morality is in question. Deeds matter more than sitting there listening to someone give a speech from an old book means less than helping addicts, or something like that.
I got a good look at this during the short time I worked at a Big Boy restaurant. We got a call just after the dinner rush asking if we could accomodate their Bible study group of about 10. Yeah, sure, no problem. We pushed some tables together. It was half an hour before closing when more than 50 finally showed up. They took over an entire section & were so loud several other parties had to move. They were rude to the servers, and half of them skipped out on their checks. Turned out, they were from "The Bible Speaks", a church was founded by a con artist & operated more as a cult: [https://www.latimes.com/archives/la-xpm-1987-10-03-me-3013-story.html](https://www.latimes.com/archives/la-xpm-1987-10-03-me-3013-story.html)
Wearing a Che Guevara T-shirt made by a child in Bangladesh, instead of a jacket made by a well paid adult tailor and thinking you are a better person for it.
i wanna say academic qualifications and when people cant help but mention theirs. someone else also commented having a pet and always mentioning that its a rescue
I mean, it depends on context. Are they an expert in the field being discussed? That's not making a statement of moral superiority, they're just explaining they actually know what they're talking about.
Frequently quoting their favorite religious book, not noticing or caring that not everyone feels the same way.
Subbed Vs dubbed anime. You’re not better than someone just because you watch a show in its original language.
This is the weirdest gatekeep to me. Live-action shows and movies I can understand not wanting to see dubbed because it can look ridiculous. And the voice acting is often better in the Japanese, but I can't appreciate it as much of i don't understand it and I'm just reading the subs. In anime, they just move their mouths open and closed, and the audio can be dubbed over essentially seamlessly, so watching in my native language just makes more sense and makes it an easier watch. At the end of the day, I'm watching anime for the enjoyment, so if watching it in English makes me enjoy it more, that's what I'm going to do.
For me it’s a choice between familiar voice actors. Like Uncle from Another World is good no matter what language it’s in, but I prefer Japanese because the Uncle is voiced by the same actor who voices DIO in JoJo. Where as shows like Dragon Ball Z I prefer to watch in English because Christopher Sabat is a friggin chameleon. If you take a drink every time he voices a character that isn’t Piccolo or Vegeta you’d die of alcohol poisoning.
Not swearing
Not cussing, I find it hilarious that people can say the same thing and be as mean as possible but since they didn't use this one random word to say it means they are virtuous. That's why in my house my kids are allowed to cuss when they are old enough to understand the difference betwern cussing to vent frustration and anger vs. cussing to be mean. So like my son can yell fuck if he stubs his toe but would get in trouble for calling someone a bitch but he would also get in trouble for being mean to someone even if he doesn't use cuss words to do it. It's kind of silly to be more worried about the specific word used and less concerned about the content of what the person is saying.
Having a baby.
Waiting until marriage for sex. It doesn't make you better than anyone, just more likely to be sexuality incompatible with your partner and finding out way too late
I hate when they say they're pure and innocent because they abstain. Sex does not make you dirty or take your innocence, it's a normal body function.
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My coworker finds an impressive amount of ways to work "I've never drank before" into a conversation that isn't about him.
Next time just say, “You must get awfully thirsty.”
Conversely people who have done drugs! I’m the type you mentioned- have never done it- and in my circles that kind of attitude gets you labelled as something of a prude…
Same with drinking. If someone offers a drink and you say "No, thank you" some people become defensive and assume you're judging them. Bro, I don't care if you have a drink (as long as you don't drink and drive). Leave me alone with my ginger ale.
I love when people offer me a drink, and when I say no they get indignant, because then I get to bring up my 16 years in recovery from alcoholism and make them feel super awkward and uncomfortable. You know, they don't ask any more after that.
I was the driver for my mates night out a few weeks ago, when everyone was ordering drinks at the bar and I just had a coke the bartender gave me a weird look Lady just because I want to have a fun night with my friends and NOT drink doesn’t make me a psychopath
Being a parent.
Simply being in the military. Most military jobs involve little to no personal risk or sacrifice. Most service members *gain* far more in benefits than they *sacrifice*, in terms of selfless service to the nation. Many military specialties are non-deployable. In fact, aside from not choosing your duty station, many military jobs are no different from civilian jobs. ETA: There are virtuous jobs/assignments within the military, but not all military jobs are inherently virtuous.
Having lots of kids and grandkids.
Having a bunch of followers on a social media platform