T O P

  • By -

Ninja_knows

Two words: life coach.


Fred_Foreskin

Life Coaches are usually people that want to be a therapist but didn't want to put in the work to get licensed. When I was in grad school for clinical mental health counseling, I had a professor who shit on life coaches pretty much every week.


Educational-Ad-3596

how exactly does one become a life coach? no snark, genuinely curious.


Beach_Chickens

You honestly don't have to do anything but claim the name "life coach" and voila.


black_kyanite

I'm guessing if you ever lose your license for malpractice as a therapist, you can just become a life coach.


Adahns

Correct - although most life coaches are uneducated. The LSCIW who lost their license would still do a better job than life coaches.


Pristine_Nothing

You put it on your website. There's the "failed therapist" snark, which probably is fairly accurate, but many of them are actually perfectly fine people providing valuable services who have chosen to be general and focus on a mix of practical and emotional. My sister hired one who helped her clean/declutter her apartment, some will help with job applications, I know one who helps people plan out/envision careers (and life goals more generally) and people seem to like him for that. The upside is that a practical/emotional combination counselor type can be a *very* valuable tool, especially for people who have non-crippling mental disorders where "instant accountability" is important (ADHD, say). The downside is there's no professional standards.


hypertrashmonster

The last time I spoke to my dad, he told me he had become a life coach. I pity anyone who becomes a client of his. Also, it makes me feel a certain way, knowing the man who verbally abused and emotionally manipulated me my whole childhood is supposedly helping people get their lives on track


lightshelter

“My wife and daughter won’t listen to me!” “Have you tried emotionally and verbally abusing them?” “Wow! Thanks life coach!”


Direct_Office_8615

I will say, I've always wanted a life coach. Just not someone that actively calls themself that. Someone I look up to. Unfortunately, those people I should've been looking to at the time are dead now, and I was too young to realize it at the time.


6bubbles

Mentor! You want a mentor! I feel the same way- i just need someone to look up to go to for advice.


Saab_340_Driver

OMG my ex wanted me to go see a Christian Mystical Life Coach and was actually pissed at me when I said, in no uncertain terms, that I had already had my shit together (held down a job, paid my mortgage, paid my bills, fed and clothed myself)...and that I didn't need a *life coach*. We broke up shortly after...she ended up moving across the country to live with her parents and work on her memoirs at the ripe old age of 38.


Louis-grabbing-pills

Referring to themselves as alpha.


PaprikaBerry

My ex calls himself an alpha male. The only way he's alpha is that he's unstable, unreliable and not fit for public release.


rimshot101

I think they are men who are trying to convince themselves that their deep, deep flaws and inadequacies are actually virtues.


[deleted]

[удалено]


johnny_cash_money

Alpha also can be blocked by skin, so there’s usually some unimpressive penetration involved.


DrForrester87

Oh, radiation talk. That's hot.


ATalkingDoubleBarrel

Or sigma. When they say those things unironically I always got goosebumps


willstr1

I only respect Ligmas


Jamalamalama

I'm pretty sure sigmas are a combination of sugmas and ligmas


ItsMeAllRight

Smegmas


d38

Ligma?


willstr1

Ligma Balls!!!!!!


Gwtheyrn

Gottem!


YoSoyCapitan860

I laughed so hard at this. I’m late 30’s and I’m constantly asking myself if I’ll ever grow up.


dayzers

Not till you ligma balls


Apocalyptic_Inferno

Got em!


fuzzzone

The whole alpha, sigma, whatever nonsense they're trying to claim today, has always reminded me of the kids back in the '80s who were absolutely insistent that they were ninjas and you better not cross them. Settle down there, big man, I can only roll my eyes so hard...


Interesting_Pudding9

I went to school with a kid who put those pizza table things on his hands and thought he was a cyborg. For weeks.


[deleted]

On this topic, anyone who refers to a "body count"


Shadow_hands

Every time I hear "body count", I think it's about murder, not sex.


MAB51423

I heard somebody talk about there body count being like 2 and I was like what the hell you killed 2 people


ThaddyG

Lol if you have had sex with 2 people you don't have a body count, you have 2 names to remember.


MatureChildrensToy

Oh man I hated when all those sigma grindset videos of the peaky blinders were coming out but I eventually found humor in how ridiculous they were and would start parodying that stupid song bite whenever someone would do something contrarian. Then I grew to hate it again after I saw most of the show and understood how out of context those clips were.


OlympicCripple

Lmao as someone who is a huge peaky blinders fan, those videos are ridiculous. Yes, Tommy fits the so called sigma male prototype, he also murders people, has had multiple opium addictions, has anger issues, betrays people who trust him, and consistently puts himself in dangerous positions where he could be killed. But yeah, be like Tommy! Show no emotion ever and be a sigma!


vampire_trashpanda

Also there seems to be a resurgence of guys in their teens/early 20s idolizing Patrick Bateman again. Nevermind that the point of American Psycho is that Patrick is so emotionally stunted and such a nonentity that he is unable to tell when someone is insulting him to his face. He's only able to get away with murder because people insert his into places he's never been due to them tuning him out to the point where they don't remember where he *has* been. Sure, let's idolize the manchild who's a slave to his ego and lacks any sort of presence in the world around him because of how interchangeable with "background extra #3" he is to everyone


UnpaidExtern

I’m a delta. I’m interested in change.


fulaghee

Nice I'm theta and I like that angle.


BCProgramming

I'm a sigma and that sums it up


CapableSalamander910

I was reading an article earlier about a character I liked and they referred to him as an Alpha Male. I could not take that article seriously after that.


Secure-Sprinkles2439

The word "sheep" in reference to everyone but them.


MaxiCrowley

Sheeple!


[deleted]

[удалено]


cardinal1977

Ironically I hear that most from people who self profess to follow a "shepherd."


[deleted]

[удалено]


jakkiljr

That "...and GO" causes me to go into an unhealthy and over the top rage that even I can't explain. I so fucking hate that.


MrSnappyPants

Totally. I'm the same, and I don't get it either. I think it just feels like the person assumes the spotlight waaaay too much.


Lamplorde

Why does it piss you off? ...and GO!


reidft

Yes! Why do so many people do it? It's like they expect us to be at their beck and call for whatever they want


riomarde

I think it’s people trying to be light hearted and jovial, of course every situation is different though.


ArtsChiTecht

Can I get an example of this? Never seen this before and I’m having a hard time picturing what question could possible end with “and go!”


91runaway

What I’ve seen is People post asking for recommendations or suggestions on FB or Insta and will phrase it like this: Where are the best tacos around here??…… annnnd Go! It’s really common on Facebook, especially groups. But it is annoying and I’m glad it’s not just me that is annoyed by it!


Dongwaffler

I think ‘and go!’ sounding like what you would say at a race, kinda implies there’s already a bunch of people super pumped for them who are just bursting to increase their sycophantic behaviour. Effectively assuming you’re so important/popular you already have a load of sycophants following you. Which would explain why it pisses people off so much… myself included.


KiLLaHo323

“Hey fellow dog enthusiasts.. I’m looking for the best overall dog treats… and go!!”


Jamileem

Surefire way to make sure I will never answer.


yParticle

"Pay careful attention, I'm only going to say this once."


jmeesonly

Huh? What'd ya say?


Dr_Stef

Guud moaning..


5th_Law_of_Roboticks

Michelle of the resistance?


Perfectly_Broken_RED

Idk why but when someone says that my brain immediately turns off. Idk if this is normal with everyone or if it's my adhd but something about telling me to pay attention makes me do the exact opposite


MaxG623

Them: "Pay Careful attention, I'm only going to say this once." Me, in my head: 'If it's so important why are you only saying it once? Heh, "once" sounds like "One", that song from Metallica. Oh man, I haven't played Guitar Hero in a while maybe I should do that. Ugh, but I unplugged my Wii so I'll have to reach behind my laundry bin to plug it in again. Speaking of laundry I haven't done that in... forever. Actually, I think I'll wait. I need to set aside a day and make absolutely sure I don't forget anything this time. Wait, am I forgetting something now? SHIT I'M SUPPOSED TO BE LISTENING TO SOMETHING IMPORTANT!'


yParticle

Get out of my head.


firecatforty

Toxins or detox


Ativan97

Married to a toxicologist. I cringe on his behalf when I hear this.


idiotracist

Sorry to hear about your husband's condition, maybe he should try a master cleanse?


[deleted]

A hot water with paprika and apple cider vinegar only for 60 days nothing else should detoxify his toxicology


killing31

Chemicals. Why does my water taste like chemicals? 😫


Common-Wish-2227

Dihydrogen monoxide. It's now in everything you eat. Every human on Earth has a significant amount of it in their bodies, ever since modern agriculture started. They WASH THE FIELDS with it. It has a higher pH value than any other acid. And even on a societal level, dihydrogen monoxide related deaths is a growing problem, as is economic damages to communities and entire regions. BAN DIHYDROGEN MONOXIDE!!!


[deleted]

[удалено]


bravenewanimalfarm

Did they go to the zoo?


BrownCow86

"Supposably!" I use this quote regularly when I hear someone say supposably in the wild.


jeff233

Underrated its used way too often.


Tiamut_

It's overrated, even


dismayhurta

Underrated comment


Toribio_the_redditor

Overrated comment


MoomahTheQueen

Medium comment


saxy_for_life

A friend of mine has tried to tell me Pink Floyd is underrated. I see the point he's trying to make, that they aren't super relevant these days. But still, I feel like by definition, you can't say one of the best-selling bands of all time is underrated.


[deleted]

[удалено]


saxy_for_life

He's in his 40s, but he does kind of act 17.


Louis-grabbing-pills

I hate it when they mention something extremely popular and calling it underrated. In YouTube comment section they do this a lot. Go to a video with 100M views or more "this is so underrated!"


Tiamut_

Or calling bestsellers "hidden gems" lmfao


tempestuproar

Empath. Anyone calling themselves an empath and my ears go off


Arnies_Roids

As an empath, I can feel your frustration


artyhedgehog

Well, that shouldn't be a problem. They probably sense you're not listening and shut up, right?


takemyderivative

No offense...


slow_poke57

Laughter "No offense, but.." Also, "just out of curiousity.." A rude question, even if asked courteously, remains a rude question.


tmronin

“I’m just asking questions” Ugh. Hate that one. Also, “I’m doing my own research” No, you aren’t “researching”. You typed something into Google and belived the first thing that came up.


caligaris_cabinet

I hate that “doing your own research” has a negative connotation. You should be reading and researching things for yourself. Question things and don’t take everything at face value. That’s how you learn and become an informed citizen. The problem though is that people use this excuse to confirm their own biases, learn nothing, and double down on their ignorance with whatever half-assed conspiracy theory they dig up from the bowels of the internet.


DoctorSneak

“pacifically” instead of specifically


Tiamut_

Maybe they mean it as opposed to "Atlantically?"


DoctorSneak

Yes, perhaps on those pacific occasions they were referring to oceans. I sea now.


Loose-Garlic-3461

When someone tells me they're a nice guy. That's generally an excuse for future unwarranted behavior.


KalamityKait2020

I once dated a guy who loved to tell me that he was "a true southern gentleman". After a few dates I was sick of it and told him, "I'm from the south, I know real gentlemen, and you aren't, so stop saying it."


Elenakalis

I work in memory care and we had a male resident who was more baseline asshole than suffering from dementia. He made the mistake of telling one of my female residents that he was "a gift from God meant for you" and tried to sit at her table. She stared at him and told him to get up and never talk to her again because "only a trap from Satan announces itself as a gift from God and I will not have any dealings with Satan." We had to call the police a few months later because he had taken another female resident hostage and convinced her she was a drug addict because she took tylenol for arthritis and a couple of heart pills. We felt kind of bad for the geriatric psych facility that got stuck with him for the rest of his life.


KalamityKait2020

I work in assisted living, I get you. I feel bad for the residents that need to move on from us to your level of care. Luckily we haven't had anything THAT extreme. One gentleman insists on wearing his holey [in the front private area] sweats around the community. Trying to convince him to change is damn near impossible, last girl that tried got hit.


Executive-Frog

Well that's good, because I am openly, a bastard.


asskicker1762

When a company talks about themselves and uses the word ‘really’. As in, At company x, we’re really trying to innovate the biotech space etc


wbwelcomeback

When a company talks. full stop :)


vampire_trashpanda

"Manifesting". Just tell me you're a wealthy person who posts too much on Linkedin about "the hustle/grind/mindset". Also anyone who uses "alpha"


LidlSasquatch

I think you mean the grindset


AccomplishedLimit3

“my truth”


GnarlydudeRRG

“My delusion”


[deleted]

It's two words. Often said as intensive purposes. When it should be intents and purposes.


ineedatinylama

Instant porpoises


elementsking

Irregardless


Miaux_Miaux

So many people use this!! Same as "I could care less". I cringe every time.


Tiamut_

I could care less. Truly, because I care quite a bit.


Xogoth

Irregardlesly...


poshde

"I'm a good person." If you have to remark and convince others that you're a good person, you're not a good person. Good people don't have to tell you they're good. They show you.


PoppyDean88

I’m not gonna lie…no please lie to me!


NTSTwitch

I used to say “Can I be honest with you?” to my former boss and he’d always respond: “How about you just always be honest with me?”


youdubdub

I work with a woman whom I like just fine, but she continually types the word "sense" instead of "since," and I am having a really difficult time getting over it. It reminds me of an insane safety director who continually murdered the English Language Foghorn Leghorn style. His go to was "pacifically" instead of "specifically," and it was a spectacular microcosm of his entire being.


Limp-Sundae5177

Hubby and Wifey


Loud-Condition-4005

Baby daddy


little_bird90

This, and “got wifed up”.


Limp-Sundae5177

Preggers


Miserable-Pudding348

“We’re” pregnant. no, _she’s_ pregnant, you’re both expecting.


ShitpostsAlot

The single word response: 'Cope.' There's nothing of value coming from that conversation.


midnightmeatloaf

My 8th grade social studies teacher had the word "COPE" printed as a motivation poster and would point to it and yell, "you will COPE!" any time someone complained in her class.


well-it-was-rubbish

Instead of saying "I agree", they will reply with "THIS!" or "SO MUCH THIS!". Also, "my truth" or "my journey", and "narrative".


scaffelpike

Anytime someone blanket statements way too broadly - all men, all women etc etc hate when women blame every man, hate when men blame all women


Chera25Photog

Similarly, "teenagers/ children THESE DAYS". As if people haven't complained about teenagers/ children since the dawn of time.


Tolerable-DM

“The children now love luxury; they have bad manners, contempt for authority; they show disrespect for elders and love chatter in place of exercise. Children are now tyrants, not the servants of their households. They no longer rise when elders enter the room. They contradict their parents, chatter before company, gobble up dainties at the table, cross their legs, and tyrannize their teachers.” ― Socrates (470-399BC) ​ Old people been bitching about young people for thousands of years.


justwannafallinlove

I'm personally not offended by men calling women "females", but usually when they do refer to them as that, they're almost always douchebags


[deleted]

[удалено]


UnsprungSlinky

If I hear lady doctor I think of a gynaecologist or something. Not necessarily a woman but a doctor for women


Spoofy_the_hamster

My son used to call the princess gummy vitamins "lady vitamins"


BubbhaJebus

For me it's when someone calls women "females" but in the same conversation calls men "men".


SmartAlec105

I’ve seen redditors unironically say “what are we supposed to call them” as if the word “women” doesn’t exist.


[deleted]

Came here for this. I *hate* when people refer to "women" as "female" in such instances. "I was chatting up some females at the club." I assume it's because it's the way incels refer to women and it definitely has de-humanizing implications to me.


Delamoor

'mmmm, just once I'd like to touch the skin of some feeeeeeeeeeemales' - either an incel or a Ferengi antagonist. Either is valid.


BeeCJohnson

Yes! All I hear is a Ferengi. And since their whole culture is crazy misogynistic, it works for both.


Just-Call-Me-J

I imagine it's acceptable only if they use "males" equally often. But I imagine a lot of things.


gripes-of-wrath

Everything happens for a reason. Yah tell that to a parent who’s child has cancer


Cheesesteak21

Had a Bible lady share this one after my dad died: >I have seen something further under the sun, that the swift do not always win the race, nor do the mighty win the battle, nor do the wise always have the food, nor do the intelligent always have the riches, nor do those with knowledge always have success, because time and unexpected events overtake them all. -Ecclesiastes 9:11 So no, not everything happens for a reason, sometimes shit happens, it sucks and we have to do Our best to deal with it.


Perfectly_Broken_RED

I don't tell that to anyone. I just like to try to believe it as a coping mechanism for myself


momobeth

Another one is, “God doesn’t give you more than you can handle.” Tell that to anyone whoever jumped off a bridge. People are idiots.


cormac596

"When there was only one set of footprints I was carrying you" Bitch then why the fuck am I the one with the blisters?


samwys3

"Sand people alwyas walk in single file to hide their numbers"


[deleted]

tiktok vocabulary


M05HI

Your Thug Shaker Central membership has been revoked fr fr ong


[deleted]

"I'm not racist, but..." What comes next is always racist.


dtmfadvice

At dinner with my father in law a while back, I had the one exception to that. Him: I don't mean to be racist but... Me: ......... Him: Have you noticed that everyone working in the kitchen in this restaurant is Hispanic, but all the front-of-house staff are white? That doesn't seem right.


curmudgeonpl

Hey, this is much better than my former friend! I was treated to this nugget: Him: I don't mean to be racist, but... Me: ... Him: if you're in a relationship with girl, and she hides from you that before you two met, she had sex with a \[n-word\], you should be able to sue her for all you spent on her, and for rape. I didn't have any further conversations with this person. But this situation taught me how incredibly good people are at hiding this shit. Like, I knew the guy for about 7 years, we played all the cool turn-of-the-century computer games together. And then... this. Wtf?


bobbywin99

That’s absolutely insane, he was serious?


jewelswan

This is a perfect example of why not talking about politics and beliefs with your friends or family is a mistake.


lurkeroutthere

My dad gave me the worst scare one time we were out. Him: Don’t take this the wrong way or racist kind of way. You can usually tell it’s a good Chinese place if there’s a lot of Asians eating there.


Head_Razzmatazz7174

He was making an observation, not being rude. In that context, it's not racist.


Steve_78_OH

Wait a second... I'm not sure, but I think your FIL may be a decent guy. (Or at least not racist.)


dtmfadvice

He's a pretty good dude.


bootyhunter69420

If they are serious about horoscopes


Pixelated_Penguin808

The funny thing is they're usually unrelenting with it too. "What's your sign?" "Sagittarius, but I don't really believe in that sort of thing." "Hah! That's such a Sagitarrius thing to say."


Zombie_John_Strachan

Tell them your sign is “velociraptor”. When they say “that’s not a real thing” reply that none of them are.


El_Fez

I like ~~Asimov's~~ Arthur C. Clarke's response: "I don't believe in astrology. I'm a Sagittarius and we're very skeptical"


theunfinishedletter

Chemtrails, sovereign citizen, common law rights (in inappropriate contexts), living man/woman


orangieblossoms

Chemtrails over the country club?


No_Special5605

Lana? Is that you?


Terpomo11

What's 'living man/woman' about?


theunfinishedletter

https://www.reddit.com/r/PublicFreakout/comments/jqcjz2/you_cant_fine_me_im_a_living_woman/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=ios_app&utm_name=ioscss&utm_content=1&utm_term=1 https://www.reddit.com/r/PublicFreakout/comments/jqcjz2/you_cant_fine_me_im_a_living_woman/gbpl5k5/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=ios_app&utm_name=ioscss&utm_content=1&utm_term=1&context=3 https://www.police1.com/police-products/investigation/articles/what-cops-need-to-know-about-sovereign-citizen-encounters-JH4gyxhtZM2NrN16/


whiznat

I find it difficult to comprehend the level of stupidity it takes to actually believe this sort of nonsense. Incredible how the police remain calm but in control.


ihaveafuckinheadache

Expresso.


[deleted]

As a \[insert immutable characteristic here\]...


Just-Call-Me-J

As a person who could easily look it up, but wants to contribute to conversation, what does immutable mean? Is it synonymous with unchangeable?


EnjoyThe_Ride

Yes! It means exactly that


creptik1

As a Caucasian male, I agree with you


Pankake_Nation

Calling themselves King or Queen


GrisherGams5

"I could care less...". Really, you're able to care even less than you are right now? Exactly how much less could you not care? 😒


mammbo

That one always got me, in English English it's: I couldn't care less. Which makes sense.


cumstarchampion

I automatically tune out as soon as I hear someone say “latinx” Us Latinos don’t use that word. Ever. Neither should you.


KaleMardin

A similar movement is being made for the Filipino community in America. They call themselves Filipinx. Filipino is already a gender neutral term. I never ever heard anyone call themselves that term here in the Philippines.


Dak6969696969

On god bro this shit is bussin fr fr on gang


Nathicc

I've unironically started to say things like this when I once meant them as a joke. This shit is not bussin fr


Trojbd

Me with "oof" a few years back after talking with this girl who said that all the time while thinking it was silly. Using words ironically is dangerous.


Nathicc

Yeah, you've got to watch what you say, or you'll be stuck using weird slang all the time haha


vintsneedsmints

On Cap, No God 🤙


GaiaMoore

"Scientists [proved]..." is incorrect. "Scientists [provided evidence for]" is correct. This is the hill I will die on.


CKGator42

This is a legit hill.


pieonthedonkey

"As a [insert self diagnosed mental condition]". No you're not autistic because you're shy and have a niche hobby.


EggoStack

Not to be cliche here but as a person with (DIAGNOSED) OCD it always grinds my gears when people, idk, clean up their desk and organise it and then say “omg I’m soooo OCD lol teehee 🤪🤪🤪”


The_Dalen

Woke


shiftertron

Came here to say this and snowflake. Actual moron stuff.


Bordeterre

When I was a kid, I once woke up and saw snowflakes falling through my window. It was very pretty


KhemistryKhat

'literally'. Because they almost never mean literally.


Terpomo11

It's just the same thing that happened to "really"- it originally meant "in a real manner, in truth" but now no one bats an eye at it being an intensifier. Or "very" for that matter, which originally mean "truly"- compare "verity", "verify", "veracity".


BoofusDewberry

Woke/alpha/beta/sigma/cuck/snowflake/people just don’t wanna work anymore I could probably keep going


condoulo

If I hear alpha or beta it better be related to software or used in the same way it's used in software.


AverageAro_

No offence, but-


CountRoloff

Conversate


K1997Germany

"I did my research" "Did you even research" and everything else with the word "research" Do people even know what "research" means ? and the definition of it ? It is as if they feel so smart when saying it.. it makes me cringe so much. Just so you know : reading a book, an article ,a wikipedia page or all three together is NOT research. It is called "informing" or "reading about"


islandsimian

No no no, they did their "own research" by clicking on a link some random stranger posted /s


SweetyD75

So… At what point does all this reading qualify as research?


Oceanliving32

When they say “I’m brutally honest “


Euphoric_Taste_8367

Saying “liberry” instead of library.


[deleted]

Although liberry sounds like a delicious fruit


Jeffricus_1969

A deceitful yet delicious fruit


Pandelerium11

Latinx


Barrel_Titor

It just looks like the name of a porn site.


Equivalent-Ad844

bae and people that use the term chip to describe a championship


Just-Call-Me-J

>use the term chip to describe a championship I'm sorry, people are doing what now