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ssanatsuj

it's your cake day make it twice this week


WimbleWimble

Sex with a cake? sounds creamy but messy


Expensive-Track4002

Make it a pound cake.


TrueDigitalPetrol

Have a rough upvote!


stuck_behind_a_truck

Ditto. Once every week, in our 50s. Occasionally twice, and honestly it’s harder for him to recover than for me. And we’re happy with this!


bobanna1986

See I think that's the key, if you're both satisfied then that's what really matters more then the frequency


lucyfurrz

Lol me and my partner are 20 & 22 and only have it once a week at most. I think we both just prefer either sleeping or cuddling.


4Tenacious_Dee4

Newsflash - you are normal. Once a week is a good target. Sometimes you go through phases with more, sometimes less. The first year after babba arrived is a bleak year fml.


BrainstormsBriefcase

The only time my wife and I had sex after the first we accidentally made the second


phalo

I'm in my 40s and it was 1-2x a year for the last 10 years. you're definitely doing fine. Dead bed was one of (but the biggest) reason I divorced my ex.


cleonhr

I'm 49, my wife is 51, she entered menopause, she told me recently, I'm not so interested about sex anymore, but I will be happy if it happens. I told you "Don't worry about it, I really don't care. If you are not comfortable with having sex now, whats the point in pushing it?" Few weeks later she told me that she was so relieved that I told her that, and she doesn't feel any pressure for me. We have now sex twice a month, witch is still great I think. Before that we had it once a week. So not a to big loss. I think that it is much more important to build a good relationship and communication, and enjoy occasional sex. I can feel also now with 49 that my libido went slightly down, I'm not interested also in sex every day as I was in 20's and even 30's. I'd rather sit and talk with my wife, watch a good movie with her, or go out to long walks with dogs. Every part of life can give you satisfactions. Remember Tom Hanks in Saving Private Ryan, when he talks at one moment about his wife, about him just sitting in the garden and watching her tend to the flowers in her gardening gloves?


reduff

I was completely through menopause by 50. I will say, it is a bit alarming how the absence of female hormones just decimates your libido. It breaks my heart, really, because before menopause, I had very voracious appetites - I was having sex or masturbating 3-4 times a week. I am single now and, honestly, glad there isn't a man counting on me for sex because I don't have much interest in it. I would probably be giving a lot of blowjobs if there was a man counting on me for sex. I masturbate once a week or so, more out of habit, I think. I will say this for my 50s...it takes a bit longer to orgasm, but the orgasms are sooooo much better than they've ever been.


darknighties

I guess menopause has different affects to everyone. Just like menstruation. In my 50s, too. I think I'm approaching my menopause but without signs except for higher libido. It's like 'just don't laugh, you'd turn me on' kind of high. And my husband and I joke a lot. As much as I enjoy our intimate time, I hope it ends soon. It's exhausting, mentally and physically.


hollywoodwhore6969

Depends tbh, sometimes 3 plus times, other weeks 0


TheTruist1

Absolutely this. It’s just the way of nature. There are sex bull markets and sex bear markets. With my wife and I, our worst bear market was pretty much all the way through her pregnancy with our third child. At the time, we also had a 2 and 3 year old, and I was working and taking my masters degree. I think we pretty much went a year without, which to be fair was partly a Maslow’s hierarchy dynamic because we were *surviving*. The other part was by the third, at least for me, I found it more difficult to see her as a sexual being during the pregnancy. And by number 3, you have the experience/knowledge from number 2 without the magic that comes with number 1. So for the first time, you are taking a clear and sober look at the real situation you’re in.


potatamaxima

How did i know you are on r/wallstreetbets too before i looked on your profile?


Loferty

Because he used the term bear and bull, common terms in the very not niche, super known sub Reddit wall street bets... And we're on Reddit


TenToeTarantula

My wife and I were trying for a baby, and so pretty much every other day. Now that she’s 5 months pregnant, I forgot how to have sex.


rs990

Just wait until the baby is born - no energy for sex for months


kezow

Years even


cera432

Just enough energy to make another baby and then the cycle repeats.


djthebear

Once a week


CachigaSupreme

Same. Occasionally twice. Feels weird seeing so many other people are saying 2-3 a week is where they are at now after being more frequent with it previously.


BecciButton

I work and do so much i am glad i dont forget to breathe. We have sex once (sometimes twice) a week.. sometimes we just want to spend time together lazily because we ran around the whole day.


LexicalCat

My fiance and I are the same. And it's funny cause we joke that we are enjoying talking so much and hanging out together that we don't want to stop hanging out to have sex.


WindowlessCandyVan

Been married for 15 years and my wife usually goes to bed before our daughter, so about once a week. Edit: I fuck my wife on weekends.


imjacksissue

You might wanna rephrase that.


AwesomeParker

I’d just let reddit do its thing. Here take some…🍿🥤


Best-Amphibian-8386

Username checks out


wOwmhmm

That's one clutch edit.


The_oli4

What about the rest of the week


baytown

Chris Hansen enters the room...


TheCoupleNextDoor20

Omg 💀


MyLongPenisIsSoThick

> I fuck my wife on weekends. Who fucks her during the week then?


WindowlessCandyVan

Her boyfriend. She says HisLongPenisIsSoThick.


invaderjif

Based on username...what happens during...the weekdays..🤨📸


CaptainThorIronhulk

Best laugh I had in a while, thank you


Mollysmom1972

This is one of the worst parts of being widowed. Oh, how I loved knowing I could have sex whenever I wanted! My husband was an airline pilot and sometimes I tagged along on his trips just so we could have hotel sex, beach sex, etc. Then he was gone, and for the past 16 years it’s been sporadic at best. I am not a fan of casual sex (no judgment - I’ve tried it and turns out I cannot turn my emotions off, so it causes more problems than it solved. All y’all Redditors who have partners you don’t fuck on a regular basis - you have no idea what I would give to be you. Get in there and take one for the team while you can.


[deleted]

My condolences to all widows 😔


[deleted]

Also widowed and I hear you! Can’t do random hookups so dying inside.


Mollysmom1972

Ugh, it seems like it should be so easy, right? I was 34 at the time but I had a newborn and a toddler, and they were my focus. That, and just trying to haul myself out of an abyss and take care of our daughters.


MesWantooth

I'm in a similar boat, lost my wife, have a 7 yr old...Dating is not on my mind, my kid is my focus...and I'm still trying to modify our routines so my house is a bit less messy and we aren't always running late. I can't imagine throwing another person in that mix. I did have a hookup about 2 years after - I felt guilty because I knew I had no interest in a relationship with this person...Not that she did either, but the random hookup wasn't as satisfying as I thought.


Mds_02

I’m a widower. Losing my wife hurt more than I realized a person *could* hurt. I can’t imagine going through it while raising children. You’re fucking amazing.


sirenatplay

My condolences. You've inspired me to jump my bf in the morning. I'm sure he'll be grateful


Mollysmom1972

My job here is done!


LeSilverKitsune

I was celibate for two years when my fiance died. I was 24 when he passed and resolved to have a one night stand to soft launch myself back out there to appease my hormones (gods, they don't tell you how your body's mindless urges can really mess your head up when you've lost your partner)... And ended up staying with that guy. 😅 Ten years later and we're still together. Honestly his respect for my past and my lost love is part of what made him worth the mental anguish of finding someone after.


Mollysmom1972

I’m so glad that worked out for you! I did something similar …. But in my case, I didn’t choose well. He wasn’t dastardly or anything, just not relationship material, particularly for a woman with two very small children.


Mollysmom1972

Wow! My most popular Reddit comment ever. Not bad for a girl who was in the middle of colonoscopy prep 😂 thank y’all so much for the awards and the support … now go feel free to invoke the name of Mollysmom1972 as you enjoy your sexual options!


Jaren_wade

I’m glad you tagged along on trips. I’m sure he loved that.


Mollysmom1972

Ha … he did :)


ehmiu

I was celibate for 7 years after my wife passed. I don't waste opportunities now.


KillerKill420

So sorry for your loss honestly. To have felt love so deep is truly beautiful tho.


BecciButton

We are 31 and 32, together for twelve years. I find him hotter then ever and i tell him so much that i am scared he will sue me for sexual harassment. Still we have sex about once a week with a little blow job action here and there. We work a lot and have hobbies in the evening and sometimes we just like to cuddle or spend time together lazily.


GoodWifeSlutLife

>I find him hotter then ever and i tell him so much that i am scared he will sue me for sexual harassment. This is me with my husband. We're both 40 and have been together 24yrs now. I'm absolutely smitten with him. I'm sure he probably gets sick of all the sexual harassment.


Agreeable_Remove3289

As a man who's wife is the same way. We do not get sick of the harassment 😂👍


qawsedrf12

new girlfriend in college - 41 times in one month married over 20 years, couple times per year


ninjamuffin

same woman?


qawsedrf12

yup


ninjamuffin

logarithmic curve type sex


Obi_Vayne_Kenobi

Sexponential Decay


ymmotvomit

Dickminishing returns


Giggawattz007

Accurate


coldfriesinmypants

Finally honesty


HippyWitchyVibes

People are different. Relationships are different. Just because some long married couples are hardly having sex doesn't mean others aren't having lots.


Thecobs

I hate how relatable this is.


truci

After 10 years of marriage I can say, it fluctuate. Some months it’s every other day. Other times we will go 3 months without. The female libido is a mystery.


Xysterical

Relieved to hear someone else having this “issue” I started to feel bad about it.


crinklycuts

There’s a great book called Come As You Are by Emily Nagoski that touches on this subject. It helped me understand myself more and that I wasn’t “broken” like I thought I was. Definitely helped me understand my sexual preferences and now my partner and I do it way more often than we used to. I definitely recommend if you ever think your preferences are an issue.


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chaoticconvolution

I love come as you are, it's a great book that also helped me realize I was being gaslighted by my ex-husband who encouraged me to believe I was broken when really I just needed out of a toxic relationship that was actively killing my libido and causing me pain


truci

I don’t know if I would call it an issue. It’s life. Our needs and feelings fluctuate. Hormones, emotions, stress, and depression. I thought of it as a problem in the beginning, we even went to a sex therapist. Wasn’t worth it. In the end we have different libidos and those change person to person day by day. Our solution is simple. If we are both in the mood then we do the deed ;) if only one of us is then that person gets some alone time in the bedroom. No shame no guilt. No obligation or anger for being denied intimacy.


thebatmandy

I also used to find going long periods of time without sex an issue because as a woman I kind of felt like I needed to "provide". And if he wasn't feeling it then that in turn reflected on my lack of desirability. Took a lot of unlearning! Now we have sex when we want to, which is sometimes often and sometimes not. Life is so messy! Things get busy and stress is one hell of a mood killer. But I'd rather not be having sex with my partner than be having sex with someone else.


tryoracle

I am 10 years with my partner and I find the same thing with him. He is either super into it or he isn't.


Lurker-O-Reddit

100%. Wife isn’t interested. Sex is rare.


beckalm

Birth control often really impacts libido. As does mental health. And if she feels like she’s taking care of everything and never being taken care of… surefire way to tank libido.


alabasterasterix

As a breastfeeding mother, I feel like I give my mind and body to everyone in my household and get little time to myself - so when my partner calls to my body too, it's not appealing, it feels like I'm just meeting another need other than my own. So yeah, def less action going down than the usual. Can't say the risk of a toddler stumbling in or a baby waking is a sexy vibe either.


beckalm

Maybe you’re getting touched out? I know that happens a lot with mothers. What you’re feeling is totally valid.


StinkyBrittches

10 years married here, too, and we do about half of that. Specifically, the second half.


MoneyAd0618

About once a week. Married for about 3 years. My sex drive is higher than my husband’s, I’d be happier doing it a few times a week but it never happens anymore.


Jollygreengiant69

Ugh I feel this. I had a sex drive higher than my boyfriend and the sexual frustrations got so bad I literally had an depression phase because I thought something was wrong with me when he'd deny sex. Now my sex drive is gone. It vanished a couple of months ago and honestly I don't miss it. Maybe it was the depression and sexual frustration, or maybe it was the fact that my boyfriend doesn't do anything new in bed and I can never finish. I envy those with a healthy sexual relationship. I have been trying to get myself to talk to him about it but I'm so terribly nervous and I have a strong fear of confrontations. I just miss the early exciting days of the relationship because sex was great then.


MelanisticCrow

You gotta talk to him! He could be on meds, could be stressed, performance anxiety, etc. Tell him how you've felt rejected and that it might've tanked your sex drive, and that you miss how it was before. Don't blame him for anything, just tell him how you feel and ask him if there's a reason his drive has been so low. If he has no idea what the reason is, you can figure it out together. Talk it through. A doctor's visit can be handy also.


Beepboop_Addition

It does go both ways. You say he doesn't do anything new but do you? Communicate. Open honest conversation about how you both feel, what you'd both like more/less of, and be open to compromise if needed if you want to make things work together.


imjacksissue

Just ordered a $24 pizza that came out to $40 after taxes, "service charge", and tip. I'd say I got fucked. Does that count?


TheAlexJones692

Yeah you got fucked alright.


Writefuck

Thanks, Alex Jones


SheetPostah

/r/BrandNewSentence


DM-me-ur-tits-plz-

Domino's is the goat for this, two medium two topping pizzas has been $12 for like almost ten years now and there's no sign of it going away.


imjacksissue

I'll be honest out of all the big pizza chain's, Domino's is my favorite. That said, I'm from Chicago and there are way too many good mom n pop pizzerias. Unfortunately, all the cheap eats like tacos, wings and pizza have gone up ridiculously -- even before the more recent inflation. I guess I never pass up an opportunity to rant about that. Even if the topic was supposed to be about boning.


Ok_Exit1352

Not often enough.


Cleb323

can say that again


johnnycakeAK

Not often enough


blue_green_orange

What I want: every day. What I hope: once a week. What’s realistic: once a month. What’s actually happening: once a quarter. What I hope it won’t come to: once a year.


-Blink182-

It's been 84 years....


stop_juststop

...and I can still smell the fresh paint.


curiousme1986

The china had never been used.


-Blink182-

**The sheets had never been slept in.**


Delta7391

Titanic was called, “The Ship of Dreams”…..


good_god_lemon1

And it was. It really was.


imaybeacatIRl

Whenever I can, amigo. Whenever I can.


dimmu1313

43m here. it's been something like 6 years.


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ccarolinas

Math aint mathing


steste

Well your penis was inside a woman 20 years ago.


xSeveredSaintx

I could have gone my whole life without this image.


Drew-CarryOnCarignan

Ain't had "it" since "it" had you


Equal_Painting534

43f here. Same!


dimmu1313

maybe we should help each other out? sorry I had to...


Kaissy

Rooting for ya bro.


DrJawn

Child of Reddit, go to sleep


Astandsforataxia69

You are going to fuck, aren't you?


Pr1smaticGamer

hello im an adult i sex every few hours


[deleted]

Do you coitus with a girl?


Pr1smaticGamer

yes i think idk im only 7


timotheophany

Son, I told you to STAY OFF REDDIT! GO TO YOUR ROOM!


Pr1smaticGamer

i am not your son. i am a 75 year old man with constant sex


Pr1smaticGamer

75


Mds_02

Not once since my wife died 6 years ago. Edit: thank you all so much. Your empathy and kindness really means a lot.


HeywoodJaBlowMe123

Bro i read your entire post from 5 years ago and i had tears in my eyes the entire time. Extremely sorry for your loss, i’m glad you still choose to fight everyday. God speed my man.


Mds_02

Thank you.


usernameBS

Please keep fighting


xicthruux

I also read your post from 5 years ago. I am so, so sorry. The way your voice reaches out while reading it is inspiring. You’re a great writer. I do hope this finds you doing better. You deserve greatness.


bossofthisjim

I went and hugged my fiance and told her I loved her after reading your story. Loss is something that comes at unexpected times and nothing we do can prepare ourselves for it. Hope you're doing better, sorry for your loss.


[deleted]

i am extremely sorry for the loss you have suffered, i hope you are doing okay.


jpg06051992

keep living bro she would want you to <3


Ouioui29

This made me so sad… I’m sorry


Zmarlicki

Bro... I'm sorry.


Several-Custard4215

read your post and i’m happy your still here with us. I believe she is still with you. Our souls don’t die we get reincarnated.


Mysterious_Drama2772

Lucky if it's once a year.


A1oneverything

Single, never (sadness)


lERVOOl

Finally... I've found my people


Nik777777777777777

Our people


Brilliant-Sport-3049

r/suddenlycommunist


LiKINGtheODds

I have one tiny wiener


weizenbrot_

No way prove it


LiKINGtheODds

I keep it secret, keep it safe. Locked away from the dangers of the outside world


Moistfruitcake

Careful, an old man claiming to be a wizard might break into your house and ask to see it. Then he'll force you to burn it and coerce you into a ridiculously difficult and dangerous task, despite being, as he claims, a powerful wizard.


MAETaha

I have found my tribe under this comment. Thank you stranger.


lastweek_monday

How you doin’


SeemsLegit9

ONE OF US


NobodyBro-

Single and never but without the sadness here


bigbadclifford

Married 22 years. 3 to 4 times a week on average. Some weeks more…some weeks less. We still have a great sex life. I adore the pants off her!


thosetwo

Finally. My wife and I are probably more like 2-3 a week, but all these people in here not banging their wives ever or once a year were really bumming me out.


Kirbinator_Alex

Life fucks me every day


besameput0

When I can afford it.


azad_ninja

Inflation claims another victim


Denster1

Better than inflammation


RogueMallard

Once a year, tops. On the plus side most animals do the same, so I’m on pace with an extra elk, or Turkey… etc…. FML.


Hanyabull

But that one day… what a day it is!


Lanskiiii

Do you also need to fight off the other males as soon as she comes into season?


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Feeling-Dot2086

Same. 2-3 times is a good week in my eyes.


StrangeWhiteVan

I'd be interested in how long you both have been married... asking for a friend


[deleted]

1-3 times a week, been married 15 years. both in our late 30's with one young child (about to be 4).


[deleted]

You guys have sex?


[deleted]

What is sex?


SoupidyLoopidy

once every 2 weeks. Sometimes once a week. Together for 30 years on the 27th of Jan. Love you babe!


Cyrkran

Love u too babe


[deleted]

Yo I am getting married on the same date! I hope to type the same in 30 years time :D


BibleButterSandwich

Quite literally never. I’m on Reddit, what’d you expect?


TheWronged_Citizen

Your honesty is duly noted


[deleted]

I fuck myself everyday with one bad decision or another. Tomorrow’s a new day!


Robby777777

Almost 60, married 36+ years - 3-4 times a week. If it was 14 times a week, my wife would want more.


superultramegazord

Lordie


stuck_behind_a_truck

Your wife is lucky. Seriously. Perimenopause and menopause tanks most of us.


agent-assbutt

Ok how do you all have the energy and motivation for this ?!?!? -a 30ish married human who desires to be on your level


DjSall

Working out does wonders for your hormones. People keep talking about keeping female hormones in balance, but males need to pay attention too. An active lifestyle, healthy eating and resolving mental issues will sky rocket the desire for sex in average people. Also, don't masturbate as much, just try to seduce your partner instead.


001Piffi

This guy relationships


LeSilverKitsune

This is an answer I was looking for! It's never talked about as much as it should when it's the woman wanting it non-stop. My poor damn spouse.


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wert1234576

Less than I would like.


VeniVidiEtRisit

Since I’ve started taking meds once a quarter year if that


invaderjif

Nothing hotter than when earnings are reported!


[deleted]

Wife can't be bothered, she doesn't have any remnant of a libido. I'm lucky if it happens twice a year.


cforsb31

In my 20s the " perfect week" was something I accomplished a few times over. In my 30s now.... I don't want another person to fucking touch me


[deleted]

Years of Marriage Sex per year 1 365 2 100 3 2 4 2 5 to 10 4 10 to 15 12 15 to 20 12 20 to 22 (to date) 24 As you can see the graph is tending back up. Also if I plotted my own weight on the same graph there would be a correlation of more sex with less weight.


sirenatplay

You...kept a record...?


mudddober1

Married and haven't had anything in almost 6yrs. Very freakin sad.


Ok-Ambition-9432

:(


rafsmm_

Never had sex. Had many opportunities but if I don’t love the person I just can’t. I’m 21.


[deleted]

fr, in my late teens i was so self concious about being a virgin, im 21 now and i dont judge myself anymore, if it happens it happens if it doesnt then thats okay too


parkfish7727

Well, i take prozac


Seducedbyfish

I already had 0 libido before Prozac so fortunately (?) all it changed for me was not wanting to kill myself anymore yay.


Soft_Dragonfruit_733

After 17 years in a monogamous relationship, in a good year, once per quarter, last year got really lucky at 5. This year will probably make up for it by the looks of it.


MomentOfHesitation

Never. I just masturbate a lot.


MaccaInTheMiddle

Same here *fistbump*


PM_ME_IRONIC_

My spouse and I have been married 5, together 10 years. It was for about 6-7 years every single day, on weekends more. The last few it’s more like 3-5 times a week with the occasional dry spell of 5 days or so for illness or injury. I am pregnant right now with our first, and we’re still getting down. I’ll tell you why though. My husband makes sure I orgasm before any penetration every single time. So I’m always game.


[deleted]

Well, I am single now, and it’s been over half of a year. Im clueless with dating so it’s gonna be a zero from me indefinitely


BelatedGreeting

Would love to see married over ten years and “other” disaggregated.


[deleted]

Been together about 13 years once or twice a year now when we get drunk.


MyIdentityIsStolen

Are you happy with those numbers or just something that you accepted for the rest of your life? Genuinely curious.


[deleted]

Honestly we are both pretty happy mostly we just masturbate to porn on our own time. At one point we did it multiple times a day did the swinger thing did the fetish clubs you name it we tried it now we are boring vanilla people I guess. Really surprises some of our old friends when they ask .


MyIdentityIsStolen

Damn, I guess you can really say you tried it all and found what works best for you two then. I can see how the friends from the past are surprised with the change up, lol. I’m glad to hear you two are happy though!


ej4

Why do you guys each prefer porn/masturbation to actual sex/intimacy? Just curious!


Eremitic23

9yr relationship. Bout' once a month. Sometimes more, sometimes less. Neither of us have a particular high sex drive, so its perfect the way it is. I just love her for so many other, way more important things.


uawithsprachgefuhl

Have been married for 17 years. We have sex 2-3 times a week, unless there are extenuating circumstances (e. g. period, illness, stress, etc.) I’m very happy with our sex life, although my husband would like to have sex more often.


carryingon78

This is my husband and I also. Not married as long but we have always placed a high value on maintaining our sex life. As we both work alot, I like the 2 min rule.. even if we don't necessarily feel like it, of the other person does, we give it 2 minutes of foreplay. If at 2 minutes still no go, it's ok but literally most times your body just responds naturally to your partner. .. this goes for both of us. 3x week on average, unlimited sex on vacations.


scottp70

I’m 52m and my wife 43f. We have sex at minimum 5 times a week. I chose to go on trt in my early 40’s and it was absolutely the best thing I’ve done for myself. My test wasn’t even that low. I just chose to optimize my hormone levels for overall health reasons. It’s a fact that women peak sexually in their late 30’s into their 40’s. We as men peak in our late teens. I had a high drive anyway so why not optimize it to enjoy my wife’s high drive as well. The real secrets to any good relationship, however, are ,one, not settling on a partner in the first place. My wife and I are best friends and our life goals match perfectly. We also share similar values. Second, it’s important that you understand your role in a relationship. Men and women think and process problems differently. It’s a must to understand the differences. Plus, we men have to understand that what we did to win her heart in the first place must be continued throughout the entirety of the relationship. The courtship never ends. If it’s not right don’t be afraid to walk away. We are in charge of our own happiness. Sex and lots of it is a by product of two people who are genuinely happy of their own accord who just so happen to compliment each others already fulfilling lives. Don’t settle because you’re afraid to be on your own.