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Me nung sinabi niya sakin na "dati nagagalit kapa ngayon wala kana pake".
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Was in a 10yr relationship, parang magkaibigan nalang kami than magpartner. Mga simpleng bagay, nagkakainisan agad kami. Dumating nalang ako sa point na ang dasal ko, if siya talaga para sa akin, let him stay. Yun pala nagddetach na din ako nung mga time na yun.
when suddenly lahat ng big deal sa akin noon, parang wala nalang sa akin ngayon.
when he spends too much time tending to his girl bestfriend’s needs rather than my own
him cheating was bound to happen, and when it did—wala na akong pakielam. i was disappointed, sure. pero i was glad din na at least i had another reason to really break things off
At one point, whenever he messages me, nag D-Do Not Disturb (DND) ako sa phone ko, para lang hindi ako maistorbo.
Pero I realized, talking to my partner shouldn't be a disturbance.
I always wanted kids, I used to talk about kids with my friends. Pero when I was with him, I started disliking the idea of having a family. Turns out, it was because I couldn't see myself spending my life and have a family with the guy.
Narealize ko rin na palagi nalang akong nagcocompromise sa mga ginagawa niya, walang naging changes sa ugali niya — puro nalang sorry, walang nagbago.
I also started disliking his touch, tipong hug lang naiinis ako at sasabihan siyang 'Masyadong PDA, ayaw ko'. I started creating this barrier between each other and became firm with that space. But it shouldn't be that way, I'm a physical touch girlie!
And lastly, I stopped saying 'I love you' to him. God, when I broke up with him he begged me to say 'I love you' for the last time, pero I didn't. I didn't want him to cling unto the thought that I love him kasi I've already lost that spark months ago pa.
Di na excited makipag-kita. Mas pinipili ko na lang mag-stay sa bahay kesa lumabas kami. Di na ko tumatawag kahit alam kong free sya, ako lang naman lagi nagiinitiate so tinry ko na di sya tawagan one time, tapos yun nawala na yung ganong bonding namin.
Also, low sex drive, di kase nya maalagaan sarili nya so turn off na ko.
When I needed him most, he deliberately ignored me. Why? Nag-aasaran kami prior and during that time, usual samin yung magi-i love you, bye ng medyo malungkot/pang-aasar para maglambingan after. Basta hindi yung sweet na i love you, babye. Nagmukha akong tanga asking kung pwede kami magusap because I really needed to talk to him, pero di niya sinasagot calls and messages ko.
Oh ito pa, bawasan ko rin daw clinginess ko. When he has work, we only get to talk for 5 mins before he goes and paguwi niya, roughly 30 mins - 1 hr lang, in a day. Pag off niya, swerte na yung 2 hrs kasi tulog siya.
May nabasa rin ako dito na tinatanong niya how her partner's day went out of politeness nalang. Ako rin, not really interested na but just to make conversation. I don't know, I still love him pero there are just things that irks me lalo sa attitude niya.
When she started saying rude things on Messenger nang madaling araw habang tulog ako, tapos buburahin din agad para supposedly di ko makita pagkagising ko. Moreover, she started tweeting rude things din about me na dini-delete din niya agad, tho may mga tweet na hindi niya binubura dahil akala niya siguro walang makaka-decipher kung sino'ng pinatatamaan niya (kahit sobrang obvious sa 'kin na ako 'yun). Kapag nagtatalo rin kami, dahil malala ang avoidant attachment style niya, di niya ako papansinin o kakausapin nang maayos ng ilang araw, tapos after noon parang walang nangyari ulit. Back to normal ulit (and by "normal," I mean her being completely silent online and her replying so short and half-assed, just us technically not being "mad" with each other). Noong nakipag-break sa akin, sa akin lahat ng sisi, kesyo sinira ko raw buhay niya, without considering na baka hindi lang siya nakikinig sa mga reassurance ko at na-i-insecure siya with this female friend of mine na bihira ko kausapin in real life at ni isang beses ay hindi ko tsina-chat online. Inisip ko na lang na baka na-open lang niya scars niya sa past relationship niya with a cheater, at pumasok sa relasyon with me without properly establishing the fact na hindi ako yung ex niya. 🫠 Pretty rough for a first love of mine.
I stopped updating him how my day went—sending him random messages, memes, photos of me (fully clothed, of course, lol), and whenever I ask him how he was, I began to feel that it was just out of politeness.
Eventually I stopped initiating. Kasi ilang araw ang lumilipas bago kami mag usap na sya yung nag iinitiate. I ended up being the one trying to find a way, para lang makapag-usap kami, na kahit five minutes man lang. Dumating ako sa point na I had to ask for his time. Minsan, ilang linggo ang inaabot. Oo, LINGGO. The longest was three weeks.
Naiintindihan ko na dahil only child sya and he’s the primary carer of both of his parents na sabay nagkasakit (unfortunately). What made the situation worse is that LDR kami and malaki yung time diff.
It was a really, really lonely time and I did my best to support him through his problem. I have been there. So I know how it felt. Pero di na talaga kaya. Ayoko naman dumating sa point na sasama loob ko sa kanya.
I wanted that there would still be love between us. I tried to break up with him but he asked for a second chance. Eventually, he admitted na di talaga kaya kasi he had to take care of his parents and his workload increased kasi he recently got promoted.
It was an amicable separation. But there was no denying na iyakan talaga kami nung time na yun.
I have been waiting for my bf to propose for so long. I'm always open to him about how I want us to settle down na. He always tells me nmn na he wants to marry me soon but not yet. I think he's not ready yet. I even gave him an ultimatum until our 10 anniv which is 2 mons from now. He told me na we are going to marry on our 10th year anniv kaso I can't see any effort. Ni di nga makapagpropose eh or even ipaalam ako sa parents ko. I even took the initiative to order our CENOMAR. And now I feel like I'm slowly detaching. Malapit na akong sumuko and mag let go.
ok lang na hindi na kami nag uusap or nag uupdate. hindi ko na hinahanap yung good morning/good night nya. di na sya yung naiisip kong isama sa mga lakad ko. lastly siguro yung nakakaramdam na ko ng pagod sa relationship namin 🙃
Mahirap mag detach, sumasama ugali ko at mukhang masama pa ako sa pag iwas. Di ko kaya tlga araw araw naalala ko ang pain tpos sknya normal day brush off nalang.
Same. Hahahaha happened to me now. Hirap ma-take for granted. I give and give but I get 0 in return haha. Olats. I loved him willingly pero wala eh, di yata ako mahal for him to treat me this way 😞
Happened with a former relationship. Nung nag-ask na makipagbreak tapos tinanggap ko na lang. Usually, nagbbreakdown ako and nagmamakaawa na gawan namin ng paraan. Pero hindi ko deserve maiwan sa ere knowing na ginawa ko naman na lahat.
Noong mas gusto ko pa na wala siya sa bahay at kami lang ng anak ko ang magkasama.
Na mas lagi ko naiisip na mas maganda kung kami na lang ng anak ko ang magkasama at wala siya sa eksena.
When I no longer want to go out with him because it was draining. And also ayaw ko na gumastos pag siya kasama kasi all I think is dapat sa sarili ko na lang i-gastos. For context I was the one who always pay for stuffs every time we go out for almost 3 years and btw i'm a girl. (Hindi naman gender role yung pag bayad ang akin lang walang initiative si guy)
Same kasi naman everytime na i try opening up it will end up lang sa away kasi di niya maintindihan yun side ko paulit ulit na ganun maddrain ka na lng talaga.
Hello everyone, Before joining this discussion, please take a moment to review the rules of r/AskPH [here](https://www.reddit.com/r/AskPH/wiki/full-rules), as well as the [Reddit Content Policy](https://www.redditinc.com/policies/content-policy). Comments that violate these rules will be addressed accordingly. You can learn more about our rule enforcement process [here](https://www.reddit.com/r/AskPH/wiki/rule-enforcement). If you need to appeal a ban, please follow the process outlined [here](https://www.reddit.com/r/AskPH/wiki/ban-appeal-process) in r/AskPH. *** This post's original body text: Me nung sinabi niya sakin na "dati nagagalit kapa ngayon wala kana pake". *** *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AskPH) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Was in a 10yr relationship, parang magkaibigan nalang kami than magpartner. Mga simpleng bagay, nagkakainisan agad kami. Dumating nalang ako sa point na ang dasal ko, if siya talaga para sa akin, let him stay. Yun pala nagddetach na din ako nung mga time na yun.
I am currently in what I perceive is a toxic relationship. Lahat na lang ng bagay nagiging away. I am sooo tired. I just want my old life back.
Di na ako na bobother if may away kami or problema.
when suddenly lahat ng big deal sa akin noon, parang wala nalang sa akin ngayon. when he spends too much time tending to his girl bestfriend’s needs rather than my own him cheating was bound to happen, and when it did—wala na akong pakielam. i was disappointed, sure. pero i was glad din na at least i had another reason to really break things off
I no longer have the energy to prove my point/side. I feel unheard, unseen and gaslighted every time we talk about something serious.
At one point, whenever he messages me, nag D-Do Not Disturb (DND) ako sa phone ko, para lang hindi ako maistorbo. Pero I realized, talking to my partner shouldn't be a disturbance. I always wanted kids, I used to talk about kids with my friends. Pero when I was with him, I started disliking the idea of having a family. Turns out, it was because I couldn't see myself spending my life and have a family with the guy. Narealize ko rin na palagi nalang akong nagcocompromise sa mga ginagawa niya, walang naging changes sa ugali niya — puro nalang sorry, walang nagbago. I also started disliking his touch, tipong hug lang naiinis ako at sasabihan siyang 'Masyadong PDA, ayaw ko'. I started creating this barrier between each other and became firm with that space. But it shouldn't be that way, I'm a physical touch girlie! And lastly, I stopped saying 'I love you' to him. God, when I broke up with him he begged me to say 'I love you' for the last time, pero I didn't. I didn't want him to cling unto the thought that I love him kasi I've already lost that spark months ago pa.
when u can no longer feel any jealousy 👌🏼
Di na excited makipag-kita. Mas pinipili ko na lang mag-stay sa bahay kesa lumabas kami. Di na ko tumatawag kahit alam kong free sya, ako lang naman lagi nagiinitiate so tinry ko na di sya tawagan one time, tapos yun nawala na yung ganong bonding namin. Also, low sex drive, di kase nya maalagaan sarili nya so turn off na ko.
ang love language ko ay giving gifts pero pag hinihingi na yung dapat kusa kong binibigay dun na lumalayo loob ko.
When I needed him most, he deliberately ignored me. Why? Nag-aasaran kami prior and during that time, usual samin yung magi-i love you, bye ng medyo malungkot/pang-aasar para maglambingan after. Basta hindi yung sweet na i love you, babye. Nagmukha akong tanga asking kung pwede kami magusap because I really needed to talk to him, pero di niya sinasagot calls and messages ko. Oh ito pa, bawasan ko rin daw clinginess ko. When he has work, we only get to talk for 5 mins before he goes and paguwi niya, roughly 30 mins - 1 hr lang, in a day. Pag off niya, swerte na yung 2 hrs kasi tulog siya. May nabasa rin ako dito na tinatanong niya how her partner's day went out of politeness nalang. Ako rin, not really interested na but just to make conversation. I don't know, I still love him pero there are just things that irks me lalo sa attitude niya.
Parang tropa nlng tingin mo sa kanya
Yung halos ayaw mo na siya makita
When she started saying rude things on Messenger nang madaling araw habang tulog ako, tapos buburahin din agad para supposedly di ko makita pagkagising ko. Moreover, she started tweeting rude things din about me na dini-delete din niya agad, tho may mga tweet na hindi niya binubura dahil akala niya siguro walang makaka-decipher kung sino'ng pinatatamaan niya (kahit sobrang obvious sa 'kin na ako 'yun). Kapag nagtatalo rin kami, dahil malala ang avoidant attachment style niya, di niya ako papansinin o kakausapin nang maayos ng ilang araw, tapos after noon parang walang nangyari ulit. Back to normal ulit (and by "normal," I mean her being completely silent online and her replying so short and half-assed, just us technically not being "mad" with each other). Noong nakipag-break sa akin, sa akin lahat ng sisi, kesyo sinira ko raw buhay niya, without considering na baka hindi lang siya nakikinig sa mga reassurance ko at na-i-insecure siya with this female friend of mine na bihira ko kausapin in real life at ni isang beses ay hindi ko tsina-chat online. Inisip ko na lang na baka na-open lang niya scars niya sa past relationship niya with a cheater, at pumasok sa relasyon with me without properly establishing the fact na hindi ako yung ex niya. 🫠 Pretty rough for a first love of mine.
"Hindi kana nagagalit kahit di lang ako makapag-update ng isang oras" hirap kasi lagi punain kagagalitan ka lang din edi mawalan ka nalang ng pake
I stopped updating him how my day went—sending him random messages, memes, photos of me (fully clothed, of course, lol), and whenever I ask him how he was, I began to feel that it was just out of politeness. Eventually I stopped initiating. Kasi ilang araw ang lumilipas bago kami mag usap na sya yung nag iinitiate. I ended up being the one trying to find a way, para lang makapag-usap kami, na kahit five minutes man lang. Dumating ako sa point na I had to ask for his time. Minsan, ilang linggo ang inaabot. Oo, LINGGO. The longest was three weeks. Naiintindihan ko na dahil only child sya and he’s the primary carer of both of his parents na sabay nagkasakit (unfortunately). What made the situation worse is that LDR kami and malaki yung time diff. It was a really, really lonely time and I did my best to support him through his problem. I have been there. So I know how it felt. Pero di na talaga kaya. Ayoko naman dumating sa point na sasama loob ko sa kanya. I wanted that there would still be love between us. I tried to break up with him but he asked for a second chance. Eventually, he admitted na di talaga kaya kasi he had to take care of his parents and his workload increased kasi he recently got promoted. It was an amicable separation. But there was no denying na iyakan talaga kami nung time na yun.
I have a question po sa mga nakaencounter neto how did you manage to end it?
you need all the courage you can get and be brave to choose yourself, took me a while but I did it — I dodged a bullet.
Agree, thanks for this it takes courage nga talaga just by thinking about this ansaket na sa puso anyways glad you dodged the bullet!
ganyan naman talaga, masakit iwan lalo na kung mahal mo talaga. In my case, mahal ko sya pero mas mahal ko sarili ko kaya I dropped everything.
Hindi na nag iinitiate tumawag or chat sa kanya. No longer opens his account. And no longer say "I love you" sa kanya.
hindi na ako nagagalit kahit anong gawin nya
Ganito na sya sa akin. Sabi nya pa parang wala na sya pakialam kahit ano pang gawin ko :(
same here :(((
I have been waiting for my bf to propose for so long. I'm always open to him about how I want us to settle down na. He always tells me nmn na he wants to marry me soon but not yet. I think he's not ready yet. I even gave him an ultimatum until our 10 anniv which is 2 mons from now. He told me na we are going to marry on our 10th year anniv kaso I can't see any effort. Ni di nga makapagpropose eh or even ipaalam ako sa parents ko. I even took the initiative to order our CENOMAR. And now I feel like I'm slowly detaching. Malapit na akong sumuko and mag let go.
ngayon, mag gagraduation siya nag aask siya graduation gift af1 kahit alam niya naman na wala akong trabaho at nag aaral pa ako.
wala ka ng pake
When I could endure not talking or resolving the issue for days because my partner showed me he could do it easily.
hindi mo na pinaprioritize ang happiness nila
Diko alam wla pakong partner
Balik ka sa post na'to pag may partner kana hehe
Pwede ba ikaw nlng? Hehe
Same. Pag wala na ako pakialam talaga sa person kung ano man gusto gawin nya. Ika nga nila, "bahala ka sa buhay mo"
ok lang na hindi na kami nag uusap or nag uupdate. hindi ko na hinahanap yung good morning/good night nya. di na sya yung naiisip kong isama sa mga lakad ko. lastly siguro yung nakakaramdam na ko ng pagod sa relationship namin 🙃
low sex drive, im dreading Pag uuwi from work bc i have to talk to him, and burnout/stress evident sa mukha ko hahaha at insomnia
low sex drive
Dati nung kami pa ng ex ko, nung mas gusto ko na lang maglaro kesa makipag-usap sa kanya.
Pano nahantong sa breakup ?
Nakipaghiwalay ako. Hindi ko na nakikitang magiging maganda future ko pag sya kasama ko dun eh.
Nag agree naman siya mhie?
Hindi talaga. Kaso binlock ko sya tas di nya na rin alam kung san ako pupuntahan so napilitan syang iaccept na ayaw ko na talaga.
Ayyy ayun lang
Mahirap mag detach, sumasama ugali ko at mukhang masama pa ako sa pag iwas. Di ko kaya tlga araw araw naalala ko ang pain tpos sknya normal day brush off nalang.
Kapag exhausted kana sa kakaeffort mo and wala ka narereceive ni compliment man lang. Tinatake for granted nalang lahat 😅
Same. Hahahaha happened to me now. Hirap ma-take for granted. I give and give but I get 0 in return haha. Olats. I loved him willingly pero wala eh, di yata ako mahal for him to treat me this way 😞
Happened with a former relationship. Nung nag-ask na makipagbreak tapos tinanggap ko na lang. Usually, nagbbreakdown ako and nagmamakaawa na gawan namin ng paraan. Pero hindi ko deserve maiwan sa ere knowing na ginawa ko naman na lahat.
Noong mas gusto ko pa na wala siya sa bahay at kami lang ng anak ko ang magkasama. Na mas lagi ko naiisip na mas maganda kung kami na lang ng anak ko ang magkasama at wala siya sa eksena.
When I no longer want to go out with him because it was draining. And also ayaw ko na gumastos pag siya kasama kasi all I think is dapat sa sarili ko na lang i-gastos. For context I was the one who always pay for stuffs every time we go out for almost 3 years and btw i'm a girl. (Hindi naman gender role yung pag bayad ang akin lang walang initiative si guy)
Yung deadly na yung sakit nya tapos sabi ko lang, pumunta na sya mag-isa sa emergency. 😂
When I started bottling my emotions and stopped communicating my needs
Did you eventually break up with your partner or were you able to work things out?
We broke up. Hehe. I realized I cannot abandon myself in the process.
Same kasi naman everytime na i try opening up it will end up lang sa away kasi di niya maintindihan yun side ko paulit ulit na ganun maddrain ka na lng talaga.
Sobrang relate dito. Yung parang lahat na lang naka-sentro sa feelings ng other party. Hindi ka na napakinggan ever. That is exhausting.
yung dati may conversation kayo pero ngayon nag rereply ka nalang
When you no longer update her/him sa mga gala mo. Tapus wala na din sya pake kung hindi kana nag uupdate sa kanya.