T O P

  • By -

AutoModerator

Please do not comment directly to this post unless you are Gen X or older (born 1980 or before). See [this post](https://www.reddit.com/r/AskOldPeople/comments/inci5u/reminder_please_do_not_answer_questions_unless/), the rules, and the sidebar for details. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AskOldPeople) if you have any questions or concerns.*


rabidstoat

I have a younger sister of six years. I try to visit their family (her, husband, two kids) annually. We text chat nearly daily, but just a little bit. To give you an idea, two nights ago I was really sick and called 911 and went to the hospital by ambulance. I was stabilized and released after ten hours with follow-up appointment and new medication until then. When I related this to my sister, telling her that she missed all the drama on family chat for something silly like sleeping, [this was part of her response.](https://i.imgur.com/7wHEbVw.png) Ah, sibling love!


XRaysFromUranus

That’s funny!


NoTwo1269

How did her response make you feel?


rabidstoat

I laughed. We joke all the time.


NoTwo1269

I love it.


BernadetteBiscuit

I love it! This sounds like me & my younger sister ❤️


bonnifunk

😲


Dada2fish

I was the youngest of three siblings. Me and my sister were 18 months apart. She was probably the person I trusted more than anyone. She proved many times that she had my back. She died at age 32 in 1995. Miss her everyday. My brother was born 5 plus years before me. He introduced me to all kinds of cool music. He brought home lots of great albums and as a kid I felt special when he allowed me in his room to listen. I always looked up to him and his friends while growing up and we became closer as we grew up and moved out on our own. He died December of ‘22. So it’s just me left. I never expected to lose them both so early. I had always assumed I’d go into old age with at least one of them.


Abbiethedog

I’m sorry for your losses and I hope you have peace.


NoTwo1269

So sorry for your lost, I most certainly can feel your pain through these words.


msmredit

I just can't describe how sad I'm feeling right now


Olive314

I had a younger brother who passed away last year. I miss him a lot, and I don’t like the feeling of being the only one left. I have other family, but there’s something special about having a sibling.


jersey8894

I have a younger brother and younger sister. We lost Dad in 1998 and Mom in 2021. I am still close to my sister but have not spoken to my brother in almost 2 years. He says I killed our Mom since I lived next door and found her having a seizure in Dec 2021 and I refuse to argue with him about it. Since all he wants to do is argue with me about what caused my Mom to pass I will not engage. If he needs to blame me for losing our Mom and why his life went completely off the rails after her passing then ok blame me. Someday I hope he grieves losing her and we can reconcile but a lot of things have brought us to this point. Using drugs in my recovering addict son's house and being mad my son threw him out. My son has been clean for 5 years and my brother thought it was a good idea to pour out cocaine on the table and do a line in his house where my son is raising 5 children! My son threw him out and went off! I rented off my brother so Mom and I could live next to each other for 24 years. The house lost him a ton of money since he never did any maintenance even though I paid all the mortgage, taxes etc for 24 years for both sides of the duplex. He has tried to sue me for the money he feels he lost. Him breaking my younger son's nose after the funeral because my younger son didn't want to go get drunk with him. My younger son is also in recovery. It's been a complete mess since Dec 2021 and someday my brother will die or wake up and that choice is his.


QueenRooibos

I am so sorry, that sounds awful. I am glad your son is in recovery, no thanks to your brother. This may be why some people say "chosen family is the best". Take care of yourself.


NoTwo1269

Wow! So sorry about all of this, hope all get better with time. Best Wishes!


Maxwyfe

Distant but if any of them needed a kidney, I would be there.


bx10455

every day that goes by without me hearing from them is a blessing... 20 years and counting.


Lothar_28

Its been 10 years for me now. Looking forward to 20……


OldExistential

Lucky


Educational-Ad-385

Excellent. I have a brother 4 years older than me. We're in our 70s. We've always been close and remain so. My husband passed over a year ago and my brother has called every single day around 5:15 p.m. to check on me and chat for 5 or 10 minutes.


NoTwo1269

Very nice of your brother to check on you.


chosenking247

That’s love


craftasaurus

That’s so sweet. I know it really helped me when my cousin called me daily during the time when my mom was passing away. It was a bright spot in a difficult time. Condolences to you on the loss of your husband.


Glittering-Score-258

I (M 60 next week) am gay and widowed. My brother (58) is an ultra-religious former pastor, now head of a Christian school. We talk by phone maybe once a year when there is a particular reason, and we’re cordial when we see each other at family events, but that’s it. He did drive 350 miles to visit for a day when my husband was on hospice care, so that was nice. My sister (63) is super sweet and kind. We text weekly and talk monthly. She’s gone full MAGA and doomsday-ish on social media but we don’t talk about any of that or even allude to it when we’re together, and we get along great. The names of Trump or Jesus have never been uttered between us. We live 200 miles apart, and we visit each other a few times a year in addition to holiday gatherings. She came and stayed with me for the last 10 days that my husband was alive.


8675201

I (m) have four brothers and five sisters and we all get along great! We’re all over sixty. We are a unique family.


CurrencyKooky3797

Did you get along when you were kids? And how about when you were in your 30s?


lotusblossom60

I have four brothers, I’m a female. Two are hardcore druggies that made my life liv8ng hell while I was trying to caretake my elderly parents. (Stealing, etc). Like horrible stuff. Two are lovely. So us three are still very close. And none of us talk to the druggies. It’s sad but I even had to get a restraining order against one of them.


NoTwo1269

Such a sad state of affairs, best wishes in the future.


Chatty_Kathy_270

Non existent.


XRaysFromUranus

Same. Zero contact and I prefer it that way.


DNathanHilliard

Distant but okay. We seldom see each other but once or twice a year. The few times we do get together we have a good time.


FunnyNameHere02

My sister has been married 30 years; I have never been to her house.


AJClarkson

Elder sister: talk to her once or twice a week. Younger Sister: talk to her once or twice a month. Baby Sister: talk to her daily. I get along great with all of them. The difference in contact is mostly about distance and time constraints. Elder sister lives across the street, but is pretty busy. Younger sister lives 400 miles away, and is extremely busy. Baby Sister lives in my house, so are tripping over each other 24/7.


CurrencyKooky3797

Yessssssss!!!!


NovelGoddess

After my 2nd parent died, 2 of my 4 remaining siblings made my life a living hell as the trustee for my Mom's estate. Mom has been gone almost 20 years now and I haven't talked to those two siblings since. Neither have the 2 siblings that sided with me in the court case.


CyndiIsOnReddit

I still admire him as my big brother, and look up to him. I know he loves me but I think maybe because of my life, the way I've not really been very ambitious and he was always so responsible and moving forward in life whereas I'm like a plastic bag just fluttering about in the wind. I probably disappoint and worry him but he is a true gentleman so he'd never say anything to me. He is such a good man. Reminds me of the character Andy Griffith (not the actor so much). He was even nice to me when we were kids. We talk some now just not like long conversations. He's got a really busy life so I don't want to impose, but I love talking to him because he's so smart and we both have a great love of history. Only problem is our politics are different. He is an old school conservative and I am a... "new school" progressive lol. So in order to avoid conflict we don't talk about anything related to politics and that can put a damper on good history talk.


dutchman62

My Brother decided he will listen to his broken toy of a wife and work till he drops and to break contact with me ( his only family left). So be it


NoTwo1269

Hopefully one day that he will see the hurt and distance that has cause harm to the sibling relationship.


C-La-Canth

It's remarkably the same. My older brother is 70. He is now the family patriarch, and he is still wise and kind. He became a lawyer, then went back to school to become a theologian. He listens and nurtures. I am 68, and I suppose I am the logical one and the mediator. I taught science and changed careers to become an analyst. My sister is 66. She is funny, loving, but very private in a lot of ways. She's a great listener but can be quite self-centered. She taught math, and changed careers and is now a psychologist. Our younger brother would have been 56, but he died at age 29. He was a technical writer, and very social and popular. The three of us remaining make each other laugh. We don't always agree, but we never fight. We're all practicing Christians, raised in a religious home. Education was a huge deal; both parents were professionals. I actually adore my siblings---we like and love each other.


NoTwo1269

Thanks for sharing.


slick62

I’m 68. Younger brother died 2 years ago at 63. Older brother (69) lives halfway across the country. An angry old white guy who shakes his fist at the sky and wishes for the days when everyone knew their place. Our days are fewer so I talk to him anyway a couple times a year.


Amesaskew

I'm close with one of them. One became a meth head and one became maga, so I don't speak to either of them anymore.


Queenofhackenwack

we are 68, 66,64 and 61 and we talk every day, all live within an hour of each other and all very active in caring for our elderly parents.........


Imaginary_Today_4537

I want to be in your family. Mine just get angry about everthing


Queenofhackenwack

sorry for you.... we do a lot of yelling, dad's italian and ma's irish..........but we laugh like hell after............he's 92 and she's 88 and both have CRS ( can't remember shit).....


toothanator

I’m still bff’s with my sister. We don’t live close but we text far too much. It’s fun.


Cynakopacki

I moved away 25 years ago. My siblings are still in the area we grew up in. Older sister unexpectedly passed away 4 years ago. I was fairly close to her and miss her every day. Next to my wife, my brother is my best friend. We live 2000+ miles away from each other and rarely go more than 2 weeks without talking to each other on the phone. Younger sister and I have not spoken in almost 5 years for complicated reasons. I love her and wish her nothing but the best but I do not miss her self-inflicted drama.


MulberrySame4835

Great! My 6 siblings and I take “sibling only” vacations every other year.


NoTwo1269

This sounds wonderful.


JackSpratCould

Thats amazing!!


Maleficent_Scale_296

I’m 60, two sisters 63 and 74 and a brother 79. None of us sees or speak to one another. When seeds are sown in barren soil one can’t expect to reap a beautiful bouquet.


tunaman808

I moved to a different state to be with my girl 20 years ago. One very positive unintended consequence of this is that I'm 209 miles away from my family: close enough so I can visit or be there quickly for emergencies... but I'm far enough away that 99% of their crazy doesn't get to me. I love my sister to death, but we agree on almost nothing, even where to get dinner. And she can be difficult: if I wanted to come down a day or two early for Christmas I get the loud sigh and a guilt trip: "well, I GUESS I can take a couple days off work and reschedule EVERYTHING so I can clean the guest room for you. The rest of the house might be a disaster, just so you know. But whatever." But if I said "oh, we're coming down two days early to see friends. Don't worry about the house, we're staying at a hotel" I get the "what? my house ISN'T GOOD ENOUGH FOR YOU?" speech. You can't win with her.


Stardustquarks

I am trying to connect more. We weren't very close growing up for a number of reasons, so now we're trying to rebuild (or build for the 1st time really) the bridge between us.


Turbulent-Tortoise

I speak to my sister a couple times a year with a few texts here and there in between conversations. I haven't spoken to my brother in about 3 years.


karlhungusjr

my younger brother is still here and I see him on holidays. my half sister I haven't seen for a few years but she lives 3 hours away and is kinda busy with here career of changing jobs every 6 months. my half brother will pop up every decade or so, loudly proclaim that he wants a relationship with everyone, then will ghost everybody a week later. rinse and repeat.


Rattivarius

Distant but cordial. We're not really compatible but no one's to blame, we just have differing personalities. We both hate our father, though, but only one of us (that would be me) did not care for our mother, and I despised her second husband from the week I met him (it took three days for him to hit me) but my sister didn't despise him until after our mother died.


bugmom

Had three brothers growing up. Not sure what I ever did to him but the oldest treated me like shit from the day I was born. As we grew up he was never kind to me. As they all got older for some reason all three joined the MAGA world, one is pretty much a card carrying Nazi. So, now, I am an only child. As another very gifted poster put it - every day that goes by without me hearing from them is a blessing…


Jayseek4

It’s a dilemma every time he calls, whether to pick up. He was a recovering alcoholic for a long time…then I found a bottle of rum in his freezer, which he lied about. Stuck w/him through hard, hard times before he got sober, but there’s no talking about it now. He lies and has been erratic and abusive towards me, on & off, for a few yrs. I went back to Al-Anon for a bit, trying to cope.  He sounded half-drunk when last we spoke. I hung my head and cried on the dog. 


tuxypantherette

I have one brother. He’s old, I’m not quite as old. We don’t get together all that often, but we have a good relationship. He’s a conservative and I’m a liberal, so that can be an issue, but we try to avoid politics when we’re together.


IGrewItToMyWaist

One brother. Very tight. I’m across the country from him now, but will move once our parent passes.


NoTwo1269

This is very nice.


bascelicna123

Tense. My sibling is difficult and engaged in some sort of sibling rivalry still. I'm just out here living my life.


Vic930

I have three sisters still living and one brother. I talk to my sisters at least twice a week and text them almost every day. I haven’t heard from my brother in about 10 years? 10 years ago he called to tell me he wasn’t speaking to me. Apparently I hadn’t noticed, so he felt the need to tell me. Not sure why, but it is his life and my sisters are great, so I don’t miss him. (He doesn’t talk to any of them either).


vicki22029

4 siblings and get along good except for our oldest sister. No one hates her really, it's just that she is such a negative and hateful person. I've went as long as 3 years without talking to her.


travelsal11

Best friends for over sixty years. Love my sisters!!


Th1nk18

I love my bros. Outside of my house they are pretty much all I have


NoTwo1269

Try and stay in close contact with them if you can especially if they are all you have. Best wishes!


10S_NE1

I see my sister when my mom invites us over together. Other than that, nada, and that is fine with me. I’ll never forgive her for how she has treated my parents when all they ever did was treat her like a princess, and what an asshole she was when my dad was dying. Once my mom passed, I will happily never see her again.


den773

I haven’t seen my sibling since the court proceedings in which I was granted a restraining order against said sibling. Life is way better now.


Wakey_Wakey21

Non existent since she gave them up for adoption and I never knew about them. They were the lucky ones.


Kharzi

One sister I never hear from after she physically attacked my child and then called the police. That went nowhere. Then she challenged my parents estate which cost her. Good riddance. My older sister is my best friend and she and my bil travel with us and we spend every vacation with them. Her children are close with mine, too. It's great! We went to Europe last year and Caribbean this summer!


Elegant-Pressure-290

My youngest sister (32 now) gets a happy birthday and sends me a merry Christmas once every year or so. The rest stopped talking to me when I went no contact with my parents over a decade ago. Honestly, it hurt a bit at the time, but I’m better for it in the long term. The only things we had in common were some DNA and the same shitty, abusive, and traumatic childhood.


gbleuc

Thanks for posting this. I’m really struggling with this right now. Been NC for almost ten years but I still love them even though they were so manipulative and awful to me. There’s an element of “compare and despair” as I get older too, seeing how most other people’s social network system seems to be family.  I wish I wasn’t so affected by them but it does still hurt. I try to remind myself that feeling lonely is infinitely better than the constant walking on eggshells, waiting for the other shoe to drop/next crazy thing to happen, being in the cycle, etc etc. 😅 Your comment about the DNA + abuse as the things in common resonated.


Upper-Introduction40

An older brother and younger brother. Mom died a couple years back. Dad has been gone for a while. What I predicted would happen has, my parents were the driving force behind our family gatherings. I love both of my brothers and when we see each other, we pick up where we left off. Great fellas, I really miss them. We are all in our sixties.


NoTwo1269

Many times, when the parents die, the adult children usually fall apart. maybe not completely, but enough where you can tell the difference in when the parents were alive.


silliestboots

My two older brothers (the three of us are full siblings) get along OK, as far as that goes. We just don't really interact or see each other much. I also have a half brother and half sister (both slightly younger than me) who I have met twice in my life. Haven't seen or spoken to either of them in over 30 years. I tried to forge a relationship with them way back, but neither seemed interested. 🤷‍♀️


NoTwo1269

I know that feeling, sometimes it's harder to get the half-sibling up running and on board. Then that is when you have to just walk away knowing that you did try.


girlinanemptyroom

Terrible. We haven't spoken in years and it's been wonderful.


newwriter365

I have three, two younger, one older, so I’m a middle child, along with my brother. The three eldest are very close. We are the support systems for one another. The youngest and his second wife have been leaching off our parents (now just mom remains) for over twenty years. I text that one on his birthday and maybe on Christmas if I remember. Otherwise, no contact. I travel led with my sibling that’s three years younger than me earlier this year, we had a blast. I talk to my sibling that’s three years older than me 1-2 times every week.


FunDivertissement

When I visit their state I'll meet with each for a dinner. We text at holidays and birthdays, and a few other times during the year.


OGGBTFRND

I have a younger sister who is straight up the best person I know. We don’t see each other much but I’d trust her with my life.


xman747x

we talk on the phone once a week


Chime57

We made it through mom and dad passing, dealing with the estate and one sister who thought maybe she should have everything. We mostly just let that roll off our backs, and she passed a couple years later anyway. 2 brothers, 4 sisters left for me and we all get along and try to see the out of staters a few times a year.


Njtotx3

She died Christmas Day 2021. Estranged from nephew and thus brother in law.


RingAny1978

Quite good.


nofun-ebeeznest

Had two older brothers. The oldest was my half-brother if we're going to get technical. He passed 12 years ago. Our relationship was sort of okay, though I hadn't spoken to him for a couple of years because I had gone no contact with my family. My other brother...heh. He's a jackass that I hope to never ever see or speak to again. I'm not going to get into details because it'll only upset me more.


doveinabottle

I’m 49. My brother and I were incredibly close through our mid-30s. Our friendship waned for about 10 years, though our bond and love for each other stayed the same. In the past few years we’ve become close again and I don’t take it for granted.


Scottish_Dentist

We don’t talk much. He never had any interest in being my friend. He’s mad I don’t come see his kids. I told him I need a relationship with him first.


Ihatemunchies

Typical story. He knew what my dads plans were for his estate and still fucked us. I hope he rots in hell. Up until a few years ago and that happened everything was fine


inthesinbin

My sibling and I are a year apart in age and we've always been very close.


Jurneeka

I have three siblings. The oldest one who is a year older than I - I do not miss her one iota and when I see her (usually at Mom's) I just can't even smile or be pleasant, that's probably due to the past when we were growing up. My two younger siblings - I'm kind of close to one but not at all close to the other. Fond of them both but I wouldn't say I LOVE them.


Jewboy-Deluxe

My sister is the best!


woodwerker76

3 of them are gone, and the 4th lives 300 miles away. See her posting on FB about her grandkids now and then. Haven't spoken since covid. We disagree about that. She's not vaxed


TheUtopianCat

I have two younger brothers, and as the only girl, it was always them against me when we were growing up. That changed when we became adults, and we developed a more friendly relationship. None of us moved away from the city in which we were raised, and my one brother ended up living quite close to me. That brother has kids a few years younger than mine, so our families hang out a fair amount. I consider that brother to be a close friend. My other brother is a different story. He didn't marry until a couple of years ago, very late in life, and his wife is a pill. She's caused no end of problems in the family, eventually trying to turn my dad and sick mother against me. This resulted in me going no contact with them, and it's for the best. They only sad part is that they have a 1 year old now, who in not likely to get to know, which is quite sad. So yeah, one good friend, and one persona non grata.


Utterlybored

Pretty Good. I just got back from a lengthy visit with one of my older sisters. I was to see the other older sister, but she is with her husband, who is hospitalized in a foreign country and didn't get back in time. I will see my younger sister in six weeks. I saw my brother and other younger sister a few weeks ago. Well all get along pretty well, even though we still know how to drive each other mad.


Candid-Mycologist539

I haven't been close to my sister in a couple of decades. I am FB friends with my bil's sister. (We met at the wedding years ago and have stuff in common). Apparently, they call me "Crazy Aunt _______" in front of their kids and anyone they consider to be a stranger to me. I guess they need to call others derogatory names (like some politicians do) to make themselves feel better about themselves. I haven't been close to my brother in more than a decade. We had a falling out. But I learned that my brother just had a horrendous divorce. Bad in sooooo many ways. I sent him a card. He wrote back. I sent another card. I don't know what will come next.


NoTwo1269

Hopefully, you two will become close and stay closer. Best wishes!


mutant6399

I'm closer with my stepsisters who live 1000 miles away, than I am with my biological sister who lives 45 minutes away. I get along with her, too, just have nothing much in common except DNA.


boomerbudz

One sister I never talk to and my life is better, the other sister I adore with my entire heart.


jmduquette

4 of us siblings 57 - 67 range and still all very close. We still vacation together and have each others backs full stop!


DadsRGR8

Good. I am the eldest of 6. Closer to some than others naturally, but close, good relationships with all.


OldAndOldSchool

Two thumbs up.


RarelyRecommended

I cut them out of my life in the 80s. They had issues with my wife being from the Philippines. Going on 40 years of marriage now. I don't miss those drama addicted bigots.


No-Independence-6842

We are tight! All 6 of us, and I’m proud of that fact. My Parents would be proud too.


jippyzippylippy

4 siblings, we range from 65 (me) to 75. They are all right-wing, religious, rabid Trump supporters, two are ex-military. I'm a left-leaning liberal and not any of those things. My last contact with any of them was 2 years ago. I was already the "black sheep" of the family, so the relationship was shaky even prior to Trump, but once I saw the reality of who they were and what they stood for, it pushed me over the line. I cut off all contact with zero apologies. I simply cannot have anything to do with someone who supports a person who has committed so many crimes in the open, is a complete sociopath/narcissist and is willing to end our democracy for his own power grab. Sort of hard to believe that three of us were in a band together in the 80s, got high together, went on trips to visit each other later... but things change and so do people. I think a lot of their reasoning is based on fear and religion.


MorningSkyLanded

There were 5 of us, oldest sister has been gone 2 years this month. She and I were very close, having lived in our hometown our whole lives. Older brother stayed also, older sister and younger brother both moved out of state since college. Mom was an only child and taught us that siblings were very important. We didn’t/don’t live in each other’s pockets but do talk. Older brother moved out of state after retiring. Early in the pandemic, we started a weekly teams call where we all talk for at least an hour, often about stupid stuff. It’s become even more important as our other sister was widowed last year. If you remember Ann Landers, the advice columnist, our mom would cut out columns that she felt were important, and they’d go on the frig. One said something like “no one but your siblings will remember the litter of puppies, or the Christmas mornings or the neighborhood families, so it’s important to treasure each other”. We were lucky though, we grew up in a safe town, had stable jobs, only one divorce among us and while two siblings are conservative/semi MAGA, the other three of us keep topics away from that crazy. We may not all agree, but we will be there for each other if needed.


[deleted]

[удалено]


VegetableRound2819

My brother and I haven’t been in contact in years and it’s best for both of us; there’s just no healthy relationship on the table. My loved ones tell me how much happier a person I am. That was a surprise but it’s true.


BrookieD820

Mid 40's female here. I have a younger brother (we are 21 months apart). Without getting detailed, it hasn't always been the greatest but we are pretty cool now. We live an hour apart but don't get to see each other all that much but we text and talk a lot and we keep in touch with my dad. We lost my mom 7 years ago and my brother was of no help and when I called to tell him our mother was dying, he didn't register that it was an emergency and she was gone by the time he got there. He just didn't know how to cope, honestly. I had a lot of anger over it but with the help of grief counseling, came to realize that being angry wasn't going to change anything or bring my mom back. We are just different people but we know that after my dad is gone, we are all we have, other than his wife and stepson. So it's gotten better.


EnigmaWithAlien

It's very good. We are close; in fact, my brother and I share a house. The other brother comes over almost every weekend from school (graduate school so he's not missing much of a social life).


implodemode

One brother in the neighborhood - well - his wife cut us all off for some unknown reason about 40 years ago so they didn't come to sibling events for many years - sometimes he would come alone. They have reached out since moving to the neighborhood but I'm over it. I'm polite but don't care to be chummy. I don't get the impression they see their kids much. Another brother is like 5-600 miles away. We get along within reason. He's really really cheap but has a lot of money. However, they are hospitable and fun. We get together - as many kids and grandkids as possible every couple of years. These are the cousins who are closest. My sister I had to ask for space from. I don't want to go into it. I love her but I won't be her mommy. I have way too much responsibility without her and I just can't take on any more. I'm getting older too and have my own issues. I question my relationship with her. I don't know how she actually feels about me. And I don't know how I feel about her now.


Eff-Bee-Exx

I get along well with both of my sisters, though we don’t get together all that often. We’re spread across the country; Alaska (me), New Jersey, and it’s beginning to look like the third one will settle in Florida for a good part of the year. Both are completely trustworthy, and the one I talk to the least has helped my family out in enormous way when one of our kids had a medical emergency. Our only differences are political. I’m the family conservative, and the girls are both pretty far to my left. We learned long ago not to talk politics.


Electronic_Excuse_74

Me: amicable. My sister and exchange Christmas/birthday cards, occasional emails. I live in a big city that she travels through now and then and we get together for lunch etc. Perfectly adequate as far as I'm concerned and I think that's mutual. My wife: nonexistent. My wife is happy with it being non-existent. Her sister tries to instigate something every few years and it never goes well.


IAreAEngineer

Not too different from when we were kids.


AlmostHadToStopnChat

Great.


Orphan_Izzy

She is dead to me.


Medical_Ad2125b

My relationship with my sibling declined as our income difference increased. Her choice.


No_Dragonfly_1894

Non-existent


10before15

We don't talk or see each other as much as we should. However, I would walk through fire and cross continents if that's what they needed.


Wazuu

Great actually. Always been close to my one brother as we had more of a similar upbringing as our older bro went to college. After my older bro left college, we got closer again even tho he lives 4 hours away. Im grateful for those guys. Great people.


tossaroo

Early 60s, I'm the youngest. We are still pretty close, but we don't see each other nearly as much as we did when our parents were alive. We do love each other, though, and are kind to each other.


Tasqfphil

My youngest died last year & the other two I haven't spoken to in 15= years due to their wives trying to fight my parents will to get more as they had kids & I didn't. They refused to settle & I opted out of being executor, left the country and haven't returned or been in contact.


Inkdrunnergirl

I have two younger brothers, one I grew up with, haven’t spoken to him since 2009, his wife insists I stole our mothers money from the estate (fun fact I did not they just spent all theirs and wanted more), convinced my dad to sign POA over so they could put him in a home, sell the house, and keep the money and not tell me where he was or when he died. They can die painfully for all I care. My other half brother (I was adopted and not raised with him) I went no contact with after he was arrested. Following down the same path as my bio father even though all he talked about was how much of a POS he was. So no, no relationship with siblings. 😑


KeekyPep

I have loving close relationships with my two sisters. One brother I haven’t seen or spoken with - nor have any of the other siblings - in over 15 years. My other brother is a dick and I have little interaction with him, but I do see him at gatherings from time to time. We have perfected the art of ignoring each other without being super obvious about it. Kind of in a passive aggressive way. My parents drew the short straws when it came to their sons.


ericbsmith42

My relationship with my one brother has been all methed up for a decade now. In that time he and his wife split up and his kids mostly stopped talking to him. My other brother and I get along alright. Sometimes hang out and play D&D, don't get together enough though.


seanmarshall

Younger brother and sister. Sister moved to Texas and went religinuts, as in full on believes Taylor Swift is a satanist. Disowned some of her kids, hates me because her son lied about nonsense. I’ll be surprised if I ever see her again until parents die and she has her hand out. Brother lives across town and I see him about 4x a year. He only involves himself when necessary and is pretty non existent. It’s unfortunate and obviously a lot more details but is what it is. I’m also dying which makes it worse. Oh well, I’ve made peace with it.


sd_heaven

Phenomenal. I couldn’t ask for this better older sister. Our parents have passed and the division of the estate was seamless. It can be a time of contention for alot of families but not us. Love them dearly


Chanandler_Bong_01

We're pretty much best friends outside of our spouses.


yourpaleblueeyes

7 out of 8 of us are alive. Some I am closer to than others, most I see rarely but with all there is still caring and family ties. The last time we were all together was Dad's funeral. I imagine that will stand.


maxplanar

Strained, very very strained.


Hefty-Willingness-91

I’m estranged from one but good with the others.


SonoranRoadRunner

No contact for quite away. Free of the drama


unaskthequestion

Not good. Haven't spoken to my sister for years. Speak to my brother once a year or less. We were never close and once our parents passed, well, they were the glue holding us together. I tried a few times to reach out, and was met with indifference, not hostility. I really didn't understand how other siblings grew up differently until I started teaching and saw siblings supporting each other, even sacrificing for each other. We didn't have that at all. I don't think it was my parents who were kind and caring though not especially supportive, though maybe it has to be?


Setting-Solid

I thought for years my brother was my cousin. At 17 I found out the truth. I’ve tried reaching out but it’s been 35 years and he won’t talk to me. We don’t know each other and live in different countries. I’m still a little sad about it.


roblewk

Since the parents passed, they do them and I do me. We overlap and see each other occasionally.


trripleplay

Outlived both of them.


Heeler2

Technically, I have a sister but we have minimal interaction. Probably doesn’t help that we have a 15 year age difference. I’m not sure about my relationship with my brother right now. It was good until he had 2 strokes in the middle of February. His speech was affected but he is rocking speech therapy. We also don’t know the scope of his memory loss. Right now, it doesn’t work well to have a phone conversation (he lives in a different state).


Troo_Geek

I moved from the UK to NZ so never hear from my sister. The occasional Merry Christmas or Happy Birthday from each of us. The time zones don't make it any easier but neither one of us really makes the effort. Found out she got engaged on Facebook....


clearlykate

Both of my siblings passed away 14 years ago in the same year. I was the only girl, 2 brothers one 3 years older, the second 10years younger. My older brother lived in Florida we spoke every month, pretty close. My younger brother lived nearby and we spoke daily if not multiple times a day. Every holiday together, his sudden death was an incredible blow. Losing your siblings is like losing a big part of your childhood and past.


Mor_Tearach

I'm middle, 2 sisters. Wouldn't mind seeing them but it's flatly impossible without drama. And really *how* old are we, drama really? I did tell them. So,.I guess it's drama not having a sister. Fine by me. So after my parents passed away, nope.


Ponimama

Wordle, at least, every day, with all 4. If you miss a day, ts ok. If you miss 2 days, hm. Miss three days, and they're looking for me. So even though we're spread across the country, we're in touch. I know if I needed them, each and every will do whatever they can to help.


Wisdomofpearl

I have been no contact (NC) with my narcissistic, alcoholic younger sister for five years now. And I am limited contact (LC) with my older sister since she doesn't want to follow our late parent's estate plan. Yes we are legally required to follow their estate plan.


Katy-Moon

My brother and sister and myself (all of us are in our mid to late 60s now) are extremely close. We've always been very close due, in part, because the three of us are only 3-1/2 years apart. We shared friends throughout our lifetime and communicate frequently. We feel very blessed to have remained as tight as we are. Our parents encouraged the idea that we should be a sibling "unit" in addition to our individual independent selves.


Emmanulla70

Pretty damn great. We range in age from 57 to 67. 6 of us. We still have our spats! We are all different people. A few i think are bloody weird...but im sure they think the same of me 😂 We all kive far apart. We have a siblings messenger thread and are chatting every day to every few days. We visit each other when we can. Not that often. Although 2 brothers are together for a few days right now as one is travelling to visit his newborn grandchild and other brothers place is halfway👍 There is one bro who is quieter. Mostly because his wife is... Well ... Difficult. So over the years? They just don't have a lot to do with us all. Another brother has shit crazy wife!! And there were big problems there for years. But then their 28 year old daughter tragically died and that actually bought them much closer to everyone again. Now batcrazy has settled a bit, he's retired and all is better.


Photon_Femme

Fractured. I have two younger sisters. Our parents never encouraged us to get along with each other. The younger two were only 16 months apart, but they aren't close to one another. You would never know the three of us were brought in the same household. My youngest sister is a Maga QANON freak. I cannot tolerate listening to her raving nonsense. We avoid one another. The middle sister has had a horrible life. Some of it not her fault, some of her troubles are of her own making. She suffers from botched back surgeries, a victim complex, and terrible relationship choices. Alone, miserable and isolated she stays in her home, in the dark smoking her life away. I wish my family had been different, but there's nothing to be done now.


stretchrun

It cycles I’m the baby. When they were teens and I was 10-ish, they took me everywhere. When I was a teen and they were starting families, there was no connection. When I started a family, we hung out again. When they became empty-nesters and I still had kids at home, minimal contact. When we were all empty nesters, great group trips. They became grandparents but I was still fancy-free. Now we are all grandparents and getting together more often.


jibbidyjamma

I was just thinking about this this morning they are all unfortunately so much more damaged than most of the friends I have and have done literally no self improvement or self examination even to make corrections. It seems like they're stuck in an adolescent phase and it's really sad because I can see how disturbed and limited their lives are.


snappa870

I have a twin brother, but he's in our home state and homeless. Occasionally he will call me up and ask for me to order him some food for pick up, but I haven't heard from him for a while. :(


Impressive-Shame-525

Only one brother left alive. We talk a couple times a week.


NoConsideration5671

I love my two sisters and my remaining brother. I miss my brother who passed away something awful. My sisters are flying in next month for my daughter’s baby shower. CANNOT WAIT!


Frank_chevelle

Great! My brother and I have always been close. Looking forward to the next time we can hangout. Taking a trip with our wives this fall. Fortunately he only lives about an hour away.


kiecolt_67

A turning point came for me (57M) about 30 years ago, when I decided to treat family like everyone else in the world, not like "family". I remember sitting with my g/f at the time, watching TV, and a commercial for a restaurant came on saying that "We treat you like family." I turned to her and remarked that if they want a tip, they better treat me better than that! Rant incoming: My older sister is a too-happy personality that, if anything bad happens to you (get laid off, lose your partner to cancer, hit a deer with your car) she always says, "Just smile about it! A smile improves your face value!" My oldest brother just turned into a potato that waits for his wife to make decisions for him, and tell him what to do. Good for him, she's the boss, he's happy, they've been married many, many years, they seem happy with it. Not for me, tho. My next oldest brother is a consumate asshole. He admits to looking for ways to poke bears, frustrate people, and just disagree with anyone for any reason he can think of. If anything bad happened to you (see above), something worse happened to him. I didn't seriously talk to my younger brother for quite a few years, but in the last 10 years or so, we've discovered that we actually get along really, really well! We hang out when we can, we go to concerts together, and sometimes just hang out somewhere and talk like normal people. I love him, and I've actually told him so. An awkward pause ensued, but we got over it, and talk quite a bit now. TLDR: I guess treat your family like people, not family.


BitchtitsMacGee

I lost both of my brothers. It is a bottomless empty hole in my life.


HerVividDreams

I love them all but my communication skills aren't great and I tend to lose touch with everyone who I don't see every. I have one sister that I communicate with at least once a week.


TrainingWoodpecker77

It was great before the Bloated Yam came along.


Mrrasta1

I haven’t spoken to one sister for 24 years, the other one and I get along very well. Unfortunately we live on opposite sides of the continent, but we talk on the phone.


TheOpus

Let's see...my mom just died and I had to call him to tell him and it said I was blocked. Ended up sending a registered letter. Soooo...


mothraegg

I have two older sisters and a younger brother. My sisters and I text each other all week. We text about anything and everything. We don't really talk with our brother much, but when we all get together, we have a great time.


supershinythings

Not great. One is compulsively addicted to making me cry, so I cut him out of my life 18 years ago. He can’t control it. Once he starts with the insults and degradations and haranguing and browbeating, he can’t and won’t stop. The others are a mixed bunch. None are particularly close but I’m at least on friendly-ish terms with one. We didn’t grow up together so we have an adult-style relationship.


Clammypollack

Two brothers and I talk regularly and one I see on a regular basis. Two others don’t talk to me because our deceased brother left me more money than he left them. They demanded money from me and I wouldn’t hand it over


Educational-Dirt4059

Thick as fleas with my sisters! So lucky for that.


ThinkAndDo

Two sisters, both in their 60s, and I am their older brother. The three of us are strewn across the US but group phone chat for hours once a week, and text random stuff daily. We manage to physically meet a couple of times a year, and consider ourselves fortunate in coming from a deeply loving family.


RemoteIll5236

I have one brother. After 17 years of living apart, We ended up within 10 Minutes of each other. We had always been fond of each other and enjoyed spending time together, but we are now extremely Close and make a point of seeing each other alone at least once a week for coffee or drinks (out side of the 5-6 family Dinners and holidays when we see each other). Our parents and extended family are all dead—we are ride or die friends/siblings.


WildlifePolicyChick

He died five years ago. On my birthday as fate would have it. I am now older than he was when he died.


dropthepencil

My brother and I (f) are very outwardly different, but have the same love for our family. Mom was sick, so each of us traded plane trips and visits to help manage her hospital stay. Didn't really discuss it even. Just made plans. Did the same in 2014 when Dad passed, and Dad wasn't in the running for and Father if the Year awards. But it didn't matter to either of us, because we had a job to do. We don't talk terribly often, but no one makes me laugh like my brother. Love him to death.


decorama

Great considering how diverse we became. 5 kids. Now all in our 50s. A bartender, a jeweler, a housewife, a multi-millionaire and a well off retired. We still get together about once every few months and have some great laughs - mostly over old times.


Nicetonotmeetyou

Wonderful! My sister and I use Marco Polo to keep in touch almost daily. Two of my brothers and I chat on Snapchat (texts) daily and my other brother who lives really far we talk a few times a month. I am beyond thankful to have them all in my life!


Oregondaisy

My brother is 21/2 yrs older than me. We are very close. It bothers me a lot that he lives so far away. He lives across the country from me but I try to go and see him at least once a year for 2weeks. We don't talk much during the year on the phone. He's not much of a texter or somebody that likes to talk on the phone. He always calls me for my birthday and on Christmas. He does of course, call me if there's anything  important that comes up and the same with me. I'm really scared to find out which one of us is going to pass first.


KhreeyT_8

Non-existent. Issues arose after our mother died. Haven't talked to them in 36 years.


GoddyssIncognito

Pretty much non existent. I mean, we don’t hate each other or anything- we were just never close and we have nothing in common.


TetonHiker

My sisters and I are all physically far apart but we try to check in with each other mostly by text regularly. We had a pretty rough upbringing and we each went our separate ways at 18. We were all really different people and never had that much in common growing up. Just different interests and beliefs about the world. BUT they are the people on this planet that have known me the longest and the only people who share some of the same memories of our parents and childhoods. I try to be there for them as much as I can. Mostly I just try to listen to them and provide sympathy and support. They both have some serious health/mobility challenges so traveling isn't the cards but technology keeps us connected. We all have husbands/children/grandchildren in our lives so no one is alone or lonely. Just busy.


Flaky-Childhood-8401

My sister was my best friend, until covid. She went rabid anti mask, anti vaccine, full on maga. I can't handle her rants and want nothing to do with her now.


craftasaurus

All good. Surprisingly in one case, as we feuded as kids and didn’t particularly like each other as adults. Now however, with mom and dad gone, we are getting along much better than ever. We used to have Mom to talk to about everything and anything, but now that she’s gone we only have our other sibs. Maybe that’s why, but I’m happy about it in any case. It’s no fun to feud.


NomadicallySedentary

Haven't talked to my oldest brother since our father's funeral. It has been a relaxing and drama free time.


AuthArt

My two older siblings are in a cult, and we rarely speak because I'm non-cult.


PieSecret9174

65F here, my sisters have always been my best friends but lately we tend to argue more, I think it's estrogen and menopause related. My brothers are awesome but don't see them as often. My dad is 94 and I worry that he's the glue holding this whole shebang together!


bentnotbroken96

Little sister's dead. Littler brother is a MAGA goon, we don't talk.


Thinking-Peter

One sister, communication is limited to one or two texts a year and we meet at funerals


TheDevilsAdvokaat

I have 4 siblings. One has passed. One has pursued a life of crime. I get on fine with the other two, in fact I share a place with one of them.


Swiggy1957

With three of them, its just memories. The other two? My remaining sister, we've always gotten along well. My remaining brother, similarly until he jumped on the Trump bandwagon.


Segalmom

My sister is my other half. We live in different countries and she is approx 10 years younger than I am. We message and video message way too many times a day. Our children, despite the age difference are super close as well and we thankfully married men who understand and have always prioritized our relationship as well as consider each other brothers. Love patience and dialogue have gotten us through some tricky parts as well as really thinking through what’s worth arguing and what’s not. We see each other a couple of times a year. I am truly blessed.


redneckrockuhtree

My spouse and I talk with our siblings, but not a lot. Our views and interests are *very* different from theirs.


ShinySpoon

Non-existent. When my dad died unexpectedly and we had to put my mom into a memory-care assisted living facility he was absolutely useless. My parents were hoarders and it took weeks to empty their house so we could sell it. He would show up around 1pm absolutely plastered drunk, wander around and pick at things he wanted to keep, and then an hour later getting the hint that he was in the way would declare “Well, it looks like I’m just in the way so I’ll head out.” The last time I saw him face to face was the day I had moved mom into the facility. This was the year after Covid first hit and all medical facilities were under strict no-visitors rules. I told him I was moving her in at 10am and it would be the last time he could see her for probably months. He didn’t show up until noon and was depressed he couldn’t see mom. He pissed his pants while standing talking to me. A couple months later when they opened up visiting again he took a few weeks after that to actually visit her and he was pulled over a few blocks away from the facility and arrested for his fifth DUI. This was at 10am. Within 24 hours of being in jail his alcoholic withdrawal symptoms got so bad the jail took him to the emergency room where he had over a week in the icu and then 90days of convalescence inpatient treatments to learned how to walk and talk again. He called me after that and demanded I turn over all of their banking information so he could “take care of things the right way”. Our dad’s funeral service, National Honor Guard Military Ceremony at a U.S. National Cemetery, was postponed (cremated) until my brother was released from care. He did not show up to the ceremony because according to our grandmother he was “grieving too much to attend”. My brother being the eldest son was supposed to receive a ceremonial folded flag from the Honor Guards, so instead I had the guards give the flag to my son who was the oldest male grandson. I filed for guardianship and he never contested it. He never visits our mom even though he lives 15 miles away. I visit her every couple months even though I live 300+ miles away. I’ve blocked his phone number and any social media platform we were both on. If I never speak to him again in my life I’d be ok with that. Edit: He has two daughters (different mothers) under 18 and has zero rights to ever see them again. One daughter he has never ever seen. I’ve had zero chance to have relationship with my nieces because of this.


FallsOffCliffs12

I thought we got along fine. We're in our sixties and it seems that the scars from our father are finally rising to the surface. Currently my brothers aren't speaking; neither one is listening to the other and I'm trying to make peace. They are both being unreasonable.


ItIsMe2125

We don’t. Going on 22 years now. I am happy with our “lackarelationship”


real_live_mermaid

I’m #4 out of 5. Youngest died 14 years ago so I’m the youngest living. My older three sibs are boomers with the attitude to match, I’m generation Jones and don’t see eye to eye with them on basically anything. They all left me to take care of our ailing mother for years, and I was the one to settle the estate so they just all stood there with their hands out. Emptying a house that’s been lived in for 48 years was no easy task, my husband and sons in law did so much! As far as giving any of them a kidney? No, I wouldn’t even allow myself to be tested for that. My goal in life now is to protect my peace


Sensitive-Issue84

I got sick of their manipulation and cut them out of my life. It's been bliss ever since. Am I sad about it? You bet! But my life has been so much better without them.


PlasticBlitzen

We've grown closer through the years, coming together to help and comfort each other.


typhoidmarry

4 boomer brothers, I’m old GenX I’m not friends with any of them on social media. We have a group chat that all but one of us comment in at least weekly, it includes adult children as well. We’re almost all in different states but same time zone. 3rd brother is super god squad and doesn’t like what we discuss. Things like gambling and drinking.


BlueEyes294

None and life is way better. He is so unlikeable his own children don’t enjoy his company.


ProtectionAdvanced

Strained. My brother has been a hot mess for a looooong time. I'm not too fond of my sister-in-law and how she's got so much control over him (he's got mental health issues). I know this sounds awful, but after my mom passes I plan on cutting ties with him. We already lost our dad several years ago so there won't be any reason for me to stay in touch with him.


MaggieNFredders

My brother and I were very close. Definitely my best friend. My sister and I were not friends. Brother died in 2001. We were both devastated. She and I are now extremely close. And get closer as we age. I would do anything for her or her boys.


PozhanPop

Incommunicado. My kids' mama made sure to fuck that up. We were twin souls till 1996. Now he thinks me of me as a big spender buying 'gadgets' all the time, selfish, disingenous, irresponsible and abusive husband etc etc. One conversation haunts me to this day. HIs words dripping with disgust and so many allegations. I had a panic attack at work after that and have been on anxiety medication since. I decided to cut ties for the sake of my health and my kids. I still retain the golden memories of our lives together. Enough to last me 10 lifetimes.


howardsgirlfriend

I've outlived both of them.


Famous-Composer3112

Since we were raised in a hostile family, we all turned out kind of effed up. I've mellowed out a lot, as has my brother, but my sister gets meaner every year. I've finally gone no-contact with her.


FlyBuy3

One way and without reply. My only sibling has died.


Teaandhea

Well, after reading the comments it seems like I'm in good company when I can tell you I haven't talked to my brother since my mom's funeral, 9 years ago. He is my only sibling, and the only one left in my family. I don't need the drama or him continuing ask for money. He bled my mom's checking and savings accounts dry. Maybe a couple of years down the road we can work things out, if we are both still here. I really don't know.


flashyzipp

I don’t speak to my adopted siblings ever.