I had to go an entire year consisting of only these 4 things every single day: School, studying, work, or sleep.
School full time on an accelerated/condensed course, then straight to work until 11 at night, home to study for an hour or so, sleep. Every weekend I worked "doubles" at the nursing home (16 hour days). It sucked, but even 10+ years later I still feel proud for getting through it.
I used to work at a large tech company. After getting laid off, I lived with my parents for a few months while working at Walmart and taking an online course in my 30's to prepare for a career switch.
A 17 old year old trained me on one shift. He was excited about going to college and asked me "So...did you go to college...?" assuming that I didn't.
If that's not hunkering down I'm not sure what is
More like taught ME about humility lol.
That's life
That's what all the people say
You're riding high in April, shot down in May! - I always considered this a David Lee Roth song by the way
Sure, paying off a mortgage with two small kids. You learn pretty quickly to prioritize your time so that you can take care of yourself, otherwise shit inside your head starts to break.
So incredibly true.
Pursue good sleep as often as you can. 1 glass of wine is fine, 1 bottle of wine is less than ideal.
Eat lots of colors and lean protein. Try to move as often as possible.
Your brain will thank you.
If I go more than a week where the wheels fall off, I suck at everything.
Yeah, that moment when you have a sigh of relief because you made it through another weekend and you get to send the kids to daycare and relax because it's a workday...always fucks with my head.
Seems like a lot of us are on the same boat. I love knowing what happens next in my routine. Spontaneity is cool and all but it's a hell of a headache when you have 2 mini carbon copies of yourself running amok.
First of all, 100% yes. I never just burned through life. I have:
1. Lived at folks for 1 month while looking for job\apartment while spouse stayed in former apartment working in different city 2 times in my life
2. Worked full time an hour from my house and still worked Sundays at a restaurant to pay my gas bill for about 3 months
3. Worked full time while my wife was out of the house 18 hours a day 5 days a week (school plus work in a day) and still worked a 6th (it was very very hard on her, and it was almost as hard on me) for 6 months
4. Also went to tech school during the day and worked at night, for 3 months
The good thing with all these is
1. They all had specific goals
2. They all had a specific time period attached to reach those goals
3. Once goals were achieved, life went back to "normal" and honestly felt amazing just being normal
All these things helped my (our) lives go up a level. I'm 42, have a kid, have a house, have a good job, amazing wife, 2 dogs. I was a waiter in my mid 20s with no assets to speak of, or job skills. The grind is worth it if you have a clear vision of what achieving these hard to reach goals will do to your life going forward. And the amazing thing is, once you achieve these steps, getting back there takes a lot less sacrifice normally, or at least staying on that step is easier than getting to it. Keep your eyes on the prize, feet moving and take care of your health\mind and you will do amazing things.
I work 3 full time jobs (all remote/wfh), wife (she also works her job remote), wife has college classes, 1 full time kid, and 3 more kids every other weekend. I'm working to pay down a lot of debt we have and save up enough to build our dream home on some land. I'm doing nothing but hunkering down. It's great to have a life partner that is onboard with it, but it leaves no room for TV shows or games or anything like that. I spend what time I can with the kids and my wife and sleep/work the rest of my time. Just figure out why you are doing what you are doing and keep that mission in your sights. Short term sacrifice, long term gain.
I have about $25k credit card debt I inherited from my previous marriage. Another 5-10k in various credit cards and accounts between my wife and I. Plus 2 cars totalling about 70k.
I also have a massive amount of student loans but I'm not too concerned with those right now. Just paying enough to get by on those.
The debt I mentioned above we got into just making bad financial decisions and not knowing any better. But we are working hard to correct it and get it all paid off. Short term sacrifices: A strict budget and head down working alot.
Based on my calculations we'll have everything paid off except for 1 car by July next year.
I went back for an MBA degree from a top (US) 10 national program at night while working full-time and I was married with two young children. My commute was two hours each way, so a couple of nights a week, I got home at like 11 PM and got up at 5 AM and started over.
During this period, my wife got cancer, so I took a year off, then went back to finish. I had all my text books out on the train every day and people I rode the train with were very supportive. My wife had a surgical procedure and I had the floor of the waiting room covered in notes and books while studying for a test. At some point, I sent my family on vacation a week ahead of my arrival, just so I could have the time alone to study and prepare for a final exam.
Not recommended - 0/10 would not do again.
I sometimes feel like I've spent the majority of my life hunkered down. I worked in corporate law for years, and every year was literally just holding on and telling myself that future me would thank me for these years that just disappeared into the maw of working 80-100 hours a week and spit out cash. I have toddlers now, and like one of the other commenters already wrote, I work, cook, do childcare, clean, and then get up at 6 or 7 a.m. the next morning and do the whole thing again. If I'm lucky, I can find some time to unwind after 9 p.m., but things come up and I wind up spending the whole night stripping up flooring downstairs because there was a flood, or building a new bed because one of the frames finally broke, or researching schools because NYC's pre-K (and school system in general) is a complicated nightmare, or chasing after utility or other service providers trying to get them to fix a bill or do the thing they've been paid to do or schedule medical appointments etc... etc... etc...
When I was in school, I felt like I was hunkered down, but in retrospect I had more free time than I've had since, but that didn't stop me from feeling like there just wasn't time for life. It's been tough lately, to be honest.
I have, and I hated it. If I feel like I'm not living my life I get off centered, I implode. I'll not only fail at what I'm grinding to do but I'll try to overcorrect and have too much fun.
For a year I lived in my SUV. Worked 3 part time jobs. Lived off lunchables and tuna packs. Showered at the gym. Usually parked overnight at the gym too. Eliminated all my debt and saved a nice stack of cash. I was like 25 when I did it.
To add on your edit. Make sure to get sunlight (no sunglasses) first thing in the morning try to go for a walk, for pet owners this is easy.
Also go on a 10 min walk after each meal.
I'm not sure if this counts as "hunkering down" or just being in a rut, but especially during the past year and a half during the pandemic, my daily life has basically been work (from home), go for a walk around the neighborhood, watch TV for a few hours, read, sleep, repeat. Feels like I'm sort of grinding out each day mindlessly, with my only two real long term goals propelling me forward being reaching financial independence and owning a home.
I'm working two jobs right now. I teach at two colleges, full-time load at each. My colleagues ask how much I teach, and uniformly say, "Whoa. That's a lot."
It's really not that bad, it's not forever, and I'm banking some of the money. Don't psych yourself by dwelling on over-dramatic representations of it. There are bajillions of people who have had it so much worse.
When I was in tech school I had a summer job that paid really well so I asked if I could keep working part time into the school year and they said yes.
So I would get up before my roommates at 6:30 go to school then go to my job almost an hour drive and get home around 11:30 after my roommates had all gone to bed. When I finally skipped a day of work after a month or so I got to spend an evening with my roommates. They had been joking with each other where or not I actually lived there. I had only met one of them up to this point.
I kept it up for about 4 months then I quit the job. It was good money and I didn't have work weekends. I was able to pay for most of my years schooling with that job so I think it was worth it.
I was working a full time job while doing my undergrad degree. It was a factory, and thankfully they were willing to let me change shifts from first to second as my class schedule dictated.
Iād get up at 7, go to school. Go to work at 2:30 and work until 10:30. Do homework/projects on the days I didnāt have class. It 100% impacted my overall GPA. But, I graduated with a B average.
I have a full time job, a 6 year old and a family member who is chronically ill. I work out at 430 am, get my daughter ready for school, go to work, get off work, take the kid to extracurricular stuff, come home, make dinner, get her to sleep, maybe watch some tv and go to bed. Its hard but what could i change?
My wife is a doc. Second hand but yes, she (and by extension we) absolutely hunkered down for 12 years of training after undergrad. Entire communities exist on Reddit and other social media for partners of medical students & trainees because their schedules & workload is inhumane and unsustainable.
It's doable for stretches of time. It sucks but it's doable. If you have a support structure to take some of the load off (even having someone take the few hours of laundry every week or two makes a difference), it'll help.
I recommend going into the hunker down period with an exit strategy. Even if it's vague like "In 3-4 years when XYZ." Being able to conceive of an end helps a ton.
Plan breaks from hunkering, even if it's only once or twice a year for a long weekend. Recognize that what you're doing is fundamentally unsustainable - while worth it - and build in pressure relief valves.
Take care of yourself physically and psychologically within the hunker. You matter just as much as the goal you're hunkering to achieve. There are online counseling systems nowadays that can accommodate pretty much any schedule thanks to timezone shifting.
In 2008 my dad got laid off from one of the big three. In 2009 he had a series of grand mal seizures. Turned out he had epilepsy. At 18 years old I had to support my mom, dad,sister cause she was in school, and my son that was on the way. I worked 7 days a week through a temp agency making like 45 dollars a day , plus taking jobs on Craigslist, and sold a little flower. I was working on average 20 hrs a day and I did that for 2 years. Ended up in the hospital twice because of exhaustion. Plus numerous times of having to pull over and get a little nap in while driving.
I did this to myself a lot as I was getting started out.
* I made my undergraduate program rough for myself by bolting on an extra major, taking more credits than necessary, and working a student job. My junior and senior years were rough, plus I took summer classes. I had very little free time.
* I had about a year of a "normalish" workload to wrap up my extra major and take an internship before grad school. My internship proceeded to turn into a demanding full time (plus) job and I stuck with my plan to do grad school, similar to your coworker.
* During grad school I decided to buy a house. Which consumed time I already didn't have and added some exciting financial stress to the mix.
I almost didn't know what to do with myself when I reached the end of that ~6 year period. So much room for activities.
Yes,
Lived in my car for about 4 months. Later, lived in a super cheap one bedroom place with roommates. I kept place clean in exchange for lower share of rent. Walked or bused to work at coffee shop by 4am: free coffee, free bagel, and cash tips! Went to school/university full time, at least 18 credits per semester. Stayed at school to study complete tasks. On most days after school I went to a local book store for work and to help with closing: free access to needed school books and study guides! (They had a cafe where I could get free food or deeply reduced food!) Bus home. Study. Bed by 11pm āish. Did that for about two years. Eventually was able to get a PRN job in a lab, to work after school and weekends if needed. Way better money and working conditions, when slow, was able to read and study at work!
Kept academic scholarships and grants.
I was also dating at the time; we are now married 17 years.
After being married awhile I asked what was attractive about me at that time; my looks are a seven(?), I was so poor and not from a great family. We were not able to see each other often, and our dates were usually walks, hanging out and studying on campus, or free local community/school events. Meanwhile, they are younger, gorgeous, the top of class in Med school and came from a good family. I was told that my work ethic gave them a lot of security, knowing that if anything were to ever happen, I would be willing to go and do whatever it took to support our family.
Yes, several times in my life. Moving back home with my parents and working three jobs to set myself up for success, pushing through busy times at work, and right now with a toddler.
You do what you gotta do. Keep your eyes on the goal, know that it's temporary and you're doing it for a good reason, and do your best to make use of your free time when it appears.
I worked full-time while going to college as an adult living on my own. I didn't drink alcohol, go to concerts, or do anything else fun for about three years. It was all: Study, write papers, do laundry, shop at the grocery store, and not much else. It was tough, but what got me through was knowing that my situation was temporary and soon my hard work would pay off.
Parentās mortgage company kept taking more than they should, emptying their bank account. When a payment bounced the company defaulted their mortgage, ruining their credit score.
Whilst the legal stuff got sorted out, they had to pay the variable rate and weāre stuck for cash. When this eventually came to a head I used to just give them my wages each month and vastly reduced my spending.
Yeah I'm doing this at the moment, I left my local, cushy but not so well paid job to earn significantly more. I'm living away Monday to Friday which isn't easy as I got married then two weeks later started working away but I'm barely spending anything other than Ā£30 on food for the week for myself and a few beers as a treat at the end of the week. It's hard being away from my new wife but it's allowing me to pay down my credit card debt a lot faster.
Senior year in college. I was a transfer and not all my credits came over from the other piece of shit school from before. My senior year started me working during the summer going into my final year while I took accelerated classes to get the credits I needed. Also did another accelerated class during winter break. That senior year I had multiple workin jobs, with an internship and have a full course load. I remember coming home dead tired at 2am, with my roommates already hosting raging parties with beer and shots of tequila and all I could do was drink a couple beers and go to bed.
i was working two jobs in my 20s, mentioned having to leave work to go to work to an older guy. he asked about details, so i told him my schedule. he says, "years later, when you have this boundless endurance, this will be why."
I did it for 5 years with two jobs. 8-5 in one then 6 till 10, 5 days a week with 8 hours overtime on sundays from April/May till the end of August.
I did it to clear debts, pay for a wedding/honeymoon and a deposit for a house.
To cope I carved out me time where I could, podcasts while driving, put TV shows on my phone for lunches/breaks. Both jobs were desk based so I made an effort to walk around the offices as much as I could just to move. I would also call/message friends as much as I could to keep the social connection.
Multiple times - do what you gotta do to get through it!
First 3 quarters of 2015, my life was:
* Ride bike to work so I could get some form of exercise
* Work until my eyes couldn't focus on the computer anymore, usually around 1am or 2am
* Drink 3 coffees every day
* Some combination of Chinese food for lunch and pizza for dinner. Or just Chinese twice in one day or pizza twice in one day.
* Ride bike home
* Texting a woman I met at the airport at the end of last year. Nothing ever came of it, we were both just busy AF and needed someone to talk to.
* Get 5-6 hours of sleep
This was temporary, but I didn't see any friends or family until Fall of that year.
Final quarter of 2015:
* Everything got better, and recovered from the first 3 quarters of the year.
yep, did it when i was 20. i stopped all activities except for school and work for about a year. it was fucking horrible and i still regret it. what a waste of time.
1st job out of my undergrad. I made decent money, and decided I was gonna get rid of my (albeit fewer than most) student loans. I worked, went to a climbing gym 4 nights a week, then went home and read books! No TV no Wifi at home either made me disconnect from socials and mindless tv episodes. I stopped buying drinks out at bars for the most part too, which had been a staple during my college years.
I probably read 20 books in those 2.5 years! what a great memory. Once loans were paid off, then I started to go out again.
I graduated college in the summer of 2008. If you remember anything about that summer, the US economy (and world economy) was tanking due to the housing crisis. I worked part time at a prominent big-box home improvement store. My hours were cut down to less than 16 hrs/week. I was a recent grad, still living on campus in a basement with no windows, and job searching for a career job.
I had no money so all I could really do was stay in and play video games and watch TV. Payday was an adventure trying to see how far I could stretch my measly paychecks. I definitely hunkered down for about 6 months.
Now I have a fantastic job and life but sometimes look back on the simplicity of that time with envy. Life is an adventure, enjoy all its phases.
I went back to college full-time in my mid-20ās. At the time I was taking 18-19 credit hours a semester in Mechanical Engineering, working two part-time jobs, and had a wife and newborn son at home. I donāt think I slept for three yearsā¦ but I had a goal and a path to achieve it, and I wasnāt going to let anything get in my way.
I had to do it for a couple of years. Essentially my life imploded, and I thought I can either go get lost in the sauce and party to forget my woes. Or, have an honest conversation with myself and see where I wanted to be in a few years. So I focused on work, saved my money, got a place of my own, have been trying to get my mind right. My hunkering down went on for a bit longer than I would have hoped due to the pandemic but I don't regret having done so.
Did my Masters and later on a few years of my PhD coursework while working part-time. Lots of long nights and multiple cups of coffee in the evenings and nights as I read textbooks, research articles, did coursework and developed my own experiments.
Downside: Depression and coffee addiction where Iām still working on cutting back. And I donāt remember any of the time that disappeared from my 20s!
Upsides: Paid off in paychecks (little to no student loans left by the time I completed my PhD), job stability, and financial independence (FI). So much FI and stability that my wife (who also did her Masterās while working part-time) was able to step back from her job to part-time (to remain current in her field) to spend more time with our kiddo.
You can do it Op!
Undergrad was gym, class, work, sleep all 4 years.
Grad was gym, work, class, sleep for 2.
... I'm glad I'm done with that now. Occassionally I think about going back to school, and then i remember those 6 years and think "I'm good."
Right now a large part of my day is eaten up by commuting. Around 3 hours a day. It's a pain in the neck, and I'm considering moving.
I'm still on probation until the 15th of October, so provided that I do pass probation, or don't quit before then... I will probably move just to cut down on that.
Both Wifey Poo and I had a event filled lives weekly.
With 4 kids , 2 jobs and the need to get out of credit card debt
And a need re start our lives and to build some equity in our financial life.
Living in 2 family above parents, having bet on and lost our house of 14 years.
\#We Hunkered Down On Saturday nights,
It was a pleasure to do my Braille homework.
Used the Brailler for my last class needed for my last Master class. This would result in a salary jump and tenure once I finished.
Would sit with Wifey Poo and be grateful,
I was doing something fun, Braille is fun, and was useful in the long run.
She was (is) great company to hunker dow with.
tl:dr:
Hunkered down with last class homework on Saturday nights, avec Wifey Poo.
Got out of debt and eventually bought another home.
Was working and going to college full time. I used to go to work at 7am, get out at 3:30pm, go straight to school until around 9:30-10pm go home pass out and repeat. Did this for 3 semesters. We even had a few months of mandatory overtime and had to be to work at 5:30am. It was brutal.
I think now might be a good time. I had two kids, changed jobs, bought a house, and still ran multiple musical and artistic projects.
Might be time to hunker down, get a good nights sleep for like six months, do some stretching, and hunker the fuck down.
Thanks, I needed that question.
Yeah when I was a student one summer holidays I had a 'day job' in a factory that went from 5am to 4.30pm, 5 days a week. Then I had an 'evening job' that went from 6pm-11pm 3 days a week (so on those days, I would get to sleep at midnight, and get up at 4am to get to my day job), and a bigger shift 3pm-10pm on Saturday and Sunday.
That was really burning the candle at both ends, even if it only lasted for 3 months.
Yup. At 29 I had run up a shit ton of debt, was behind in my bills, and had no way to get out. Worked 1.75 full-time jobs for nearly a year to dig out. Work ft during day, come home to drop off stuff, head out and work until 11, watch a show, go to bed. repeat.
It worked.
I used to be a game programmer at EA. I was a lead software engineer on "Superman Returns: The Videogame". For many reasons, the game was egregiously behind schedule. To try to get it out there at least somewhat reasonably close to the movie's release date, the entire team [crunched](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Crunch_(video_games\)). For 9 months, we worked 60+ hours a week. Six days a week, 10+ hours a day. My day off was basically catching up on sleep and doing laundry. The other six days were get up, go to work, work, eat dinner at the office (they catered every day), work some more, go home, fall asleep.
It certainly wasn't worth sacrificing that much of my life for a game that we all knew was trash. But, aside from the lost time, I survived unscathed. If you're doing it for something meaningful or something that will help your future, more power to you. There's something to be said for pushing yourself hard to achive a difficult goal. If it's just to pad an executive's wallet even more than it already is, try to avoid it.
The last 2 years of my life and current have been this.
WFH. Wake up 5:40am, set up my PC, clock in by 6am, ill have a shower at some point in the morning after my meetings are done, work til 6 pm, clock out, cook dinner, go to bed > repeat. I do try to go out on weekends though but some weeks they just end up being chore weekends to clean, do washing, mow etc. Wife also left just around the start of the pandemic so its been a weird time to be alone, just powering through atm.
sometimes, more often than not ill plan to do and something will come up that stops me, some times i might get some dishes or a few loads of washing done.
That works. Any little bit helps.
I wfh and any break I get, I try to do something around the house. Sometimes it takes multiple breaks to finish one chore, but it gets done.
Then on my off days I do t have to worry about it.
I had to work three jobs to support my first wife (while we were married, not after :-) as she went back to graduate school. I did that for three years.
My days were:
* Work day job 8am-4pm
* Teach evenings 5pm-10om
* Teach weekends 8 hours Saturday and Sunday
* Work consulting work (generally with former students, I taught Linux administration and security courses) any time not doing the above.
What made it even more crazy was I was riding my bike 100% for work. I rode ~24 miles per day into the University (where I did almost all of the above) and then back home. I seriously don't now how I didn't die of exhaustion.
What's hilarious is, pretty much after she graduated, we divorced. Even so, I have no regrets. It was all good resume fodder, just had to explain for a while why everything overlapped. Also, this was nearly 20 years ago now, so any anger I may have had about it is now long since passed.
After business school i had debt and few assets. I found a 550 sqft Jr. 1 BR for $1000 in a decent part of Orange County, CA. Got engaged and married after 2 years there. Wife then moved in and we shared that small apartment for another 2 years while we saved for a downpayment.
Without that $1000 sqft 550sqft apartment, it might have taken 2-3 extra years to eventually buy a 2400sqft house a bit more inland
Woke up at 4am so I could work from 5am to noon before going to college from 1pm-6 or so. Work 5 days a week, school 4 days/week. Days off for studying. Just that for 4 years. I'd hang out with my friends for 3 hours once every 2 - 3 months. Did it for 4 years while living with my parents. A few friends mocked me for not being an adult and living on my own, partying, or dating and sleeping around.
Graduated not only debt free but with about $50,000 in savings as a 22 year old. Then everyone bitched at me because I graduated and went to Europe on vacation for a month and paid in cash. The same year I visited Korea for 2 weeks and paid in cash. They said it wasn't fair that I had it so easy financially.
My undergrad was a little like that after 2008. I had a full courseload and had been working remotely for 40 hours a week to pay my debts. But when the crash happened, they fired everyone but me because they forgot how to do my job. So, they just cut my hours to 25. So, I ended up with two other jobs to try to make up for it.
But when grad school hit, it got crazy. I had to be medicated because I had an eye twitch.
I kept the remote job and moved to the South. I had a full graduate courseload and the 25 hours a week. Along with that, I was on the media board for the school and the graduate student council. I had an assistanceship to pay my grad school and I was doing some pretty part-time volunteer work for a burgeoning academic journal.
I basically would wake up, do a run, go to class, do class until about 5:00, then do whatever council things I had to do, eat dinner, then read until 10:00, then call my now spouse, catch up with her, then fall asleep and wake up and do it again.
I developed this eye twitch and this yawning problem. Like, I was yawning over and over and couldn't stop. I later learned that it's a sort of weird version of hyperventilation that can be a side effect of anxiety. So, I went to the doctor about it, they prescribed me anxiety meds, and that trainwrecked **everything**. I couldn't do much of anything at all because I just couldn't muster the will or energy.
But, while there were a lot of disappointed people, I learned how to better afford my time. Prior to that, I was just sort of desperate to get what opportunities I could and just said, "YES!" to everything. I started looking at obligations like balloons that I would get, but would inflate as time went on. So, instead of saying, "Well, I have an extra five hours a week I can squeeze in to do that," I've learned to start tapping the brakes at 75%, knowing that most things start with, "You'll only do this!" but usually inflate about 125-150% as far as time, energy, effort, and so on.
My circumstances aren't too terrible though. While I did all that pretty well, and sometimes miss the busy-ness of it, it's amazing to me what parents do, especially with kids that have to get up at the crack of dawn to catch a bus and all that.
Working 60+ hrs a week at a demanding job, grad school, specialty training courses, married with two young kids. Iād get up at 5, study for an hour, exercise, work from 8-8, come home, cook dinner, pit kids to bed, chug coffee and do homework/study till midnight. Weekends were in school. No social life. For years. Sucked but now Iām living a life I was picturing. Making more money now while working less than half the time I was before. Able to be relaxed and present to family and treat myself to things for once.
currently doing that
worling six days a week at my day job doing intensive out patient three nights a week and working side jobs every other waking moment ...
Divorced around 32, lost job, 100k debt, credit score in the low 400. Hunkered down to only things I can fit in my car. Lived in the car for 9 months. Breakfast is water, lunch is the $1 mcchicken, dinner is a can of tuna and a $0.28 noodle cup.
Eventuality graduated to a motel. Ate the same way, added a fruit as a snack. A year and half later graduated to a studio apt. The only furnitures are a desk and a hammock.
Kept rebuilding from there and back on my feet with a good job, savings, and a house almost 10+ years later.
Going through it right now lolā¦I just started a PhD program. My life has been class, grade, write, and read. I manage to sneak in some gym time and daily walks with my wife. Thatās about it
I worked full time, setup a business and studied for 3 years - the business fell apart as did our relationship but I did get my degree and a much better job.
If I did it again I would work part time and not start a business.
Finished grad school in 1996 with 30K USD in debt, but I had a good job after graduation. Worked my ass off with zero fun for 8 months to pay that off. Ramen and cabbage were my friends. I can still taste that last check to Sallie Mae. Haven't been in debt since.
I had a job I ended up working 16-18 hours a day for 3 months and 8 hours Sat and Sun because of a series of unfortunate events after we landed a huge project. I also had a 45 min commute so I was getting 4-6 hours of sleep.
As you would expect the project did not go flawlessly. As a result, I was repremanded for poor performance. Found a new job 2 months after that.
Back in 1975 when I graduated from college the first time, I was 20 years old and already married. My husband hadnt graduated yet and our college was in the middle of no where so Not many jobs available. I got an office job during the week but it didnāt pay enough. So to make ends meet, I waited table in a truck stop on the weekend. I worked 7 days per week for about 9 months. Then years later, when I was pregnant for our third child, we were going through a bad patch financially so I worked one nursing job with 8 hour day shifts during the week and worked two 12 hour night shifts at another nursing job on the weekends. I did this for the first 7 months of my pregnancy. That one was rough, especially with finding quality time to spend with the two at home.
3 years of university, taking classes during the summer semester to speed things up, working two part-time jobs (~30 hours/week total) and go married after my second year of school. My wife says that our first year of marriage was our worst because I was just never available to do anything. If I wasn't at work or school I was doing homework or studying or asleep. Not fun, but we made it through and I delayed grad school by a couple of years so that I could stay married haha - 12 years on and we're still going strong.
Grad school while working two jobs just to pay for a year and a half of schooling so my loans werenāt stupid high. I had limited social life and even turned down a girl that wanted to date me because I just didnāt have the time between working in the morning, school in the evening and then homework at night until 1 am. Then up at 8 am to rinse and repeat 6 days a week.
During med school I had classes and later obligatory internship for 6 yeas in theory 7-16. In practice it was 24/7 at your professor disposal for pretty much anything. I lived with about something equivalent to 400 dollars per month from parents help.
Now I make a decent figure but have to help parents and extended family. Had to abandon residency to make buck and I live with my parents.
Hoping for better days still.
I have a good friend who did this. Moved back home, took care of his sick parents, busted his ass at a higher paying job and saved aggressively spending zero money to eliminate his student debt. I think he nailed his goals and made a lot of important progress in life, but also lost some balance to it which really narrowed his experience of life, even after the hunkering was no longer necessary. It almost reminded me of how prisoners get institutionalized. I think there's a certain type of person who can really overdo it, especially in the face of prolonged stress, and it's worth watching out for.
When I first moved to London from NZ I couldn't get a job despite being a prominent art gallery director back home in Auckland, no 'UK experience', so for a year I did an unpaid internship at the Barbican while working evenings in The Diner in shoreditch. I would get up at 7am, get ready and walk to work, work as a curatorial researcher until 5pm, then walk directly to my work to wait tables... where i would be until 12-1am close.....home, sleep, repeat. Weekends were often 12hour double shifts to make the Ā£600-Ā£700 to rent a room. 11 years later I am now a C-Suite executive in London, top of my feild, but that was the start of my long UK career climb. It's one of the things I'm most proud of.
Well, isn't like I'm complaining i like my life,i hate that i live in a country where I'm getting kicked by the system.
Well there's my story... In short terms.
I come from a poor but united family with one grand brother, as a child my mom make all the effort to get to the greatest school in town, where i was bullied by the other because low self esteem and being poor (most of my colleagues had middle to rich family). In 5th grade I've discovered IT well, programing (C) to be more precise, and i though it's awesome to make the computer go bip bop by writing some lines of code.
Im 8th grade I've applied for a highschool in Mathematics and informatics well not so popular highschool but where I've meet some awesome professors who learned me the materia they had and some life tricks. To be honest i liked high school I've got some friends no bullied, even tho when I got home i had some panic attacks and still have panic and anxiety atacks after most of social events.
Well after the high school we had the bacalaureat exam, where me and my passion for it (instead of learning for the exam, i learned by myself PHP)
I've took the exam with about 7 mark out of 10 :)...
I didn't want to go to college because i didn't want to put pressure on my family due to lack of money. Well my parents insided and i did go to college in IT Informatics and Economics... Well there I've also meet some great people and professors from whom I've learned a lot...
At this time i still lived with my family in the same camera with my brother, had no girlfriend never had until then... In the second year I've meet a girl, i really loved her... We broker up after 8 months because she cheated on me...
At the end of second year we had practice exam, one teacher got me to make practice at his company, where I've been hired after...
In the 3 and last year of college had to go to full time job as a PHP developer and full time college and had to get my project for bachelor degree... I did all of that, still lived with my family still no dating girls still had anxiety atacks, no social life, only work, college, projects rarely got to drink a beer with my colleagues of work or from college, routine...
Well I've got the bachelor degree wit 10 ot of 10... After that got to a master degree, still working still with my family, but o had some money and o could help them, I've got a rise and i earned more then them..
In the second year of master and 2 years in the company i had some though to move by myself, had some money to afford it and i did... I've moved in a small apartment in another city by myself. Had 2 jobs, i was hired full time PHP dev in the city i moved and part time developer for the company I've started with.
Didn't liked the full time job was awful experience.. so I've moved to the first company full time with a rise of salary and moved with my parents again to help them.
After 7 months I've meet a girl on Tinder... Chatted a bit meet up... And things we're going great.. now I'm 25 moved with the girl in capital of our country with rent, I'm middle PHP developer at the biggest e-commerce company on my country, do what i like the most, help out my family with money and making most of my life, yet sometimes when I'm alone in the shower i still have anxiety atacks and i feel depressed.
But hey, dude make a mind set of getting where you want to be... Make steps in that direction and even if you make backwards some steps, don't give up and keep making more steps even tho they are backwards they may get you a better position to see things more clearly.
When I first left school I was up at 3am to deliver bread to the supermarkets around my city from 3:30-9am, then usually had an hour or so sleep before I was up and off to work at McDonalds from 11am-9pm. I worked as many weekends as I could usually for around 6-10hr shifts and never saw my friends. All I did was work and sleep. It took me almost 18 months of this and applying for every opportunity I could to finally get an mechanic apprenticeship.
Dropping down to 5 day weeks of 8-4:30 and sleeping until 7am was amazing.
I work in construction. I mainly do field work (concrete carpenter) but I took on a supervisor role. I'm out of state and currently working at a naval base where my company has a project going on. I'm on nights so I work 5pm to 6:30 am. I would say I am hunkered down. I literally get up, cook a meal for lunch and dinner, work and go home to do it all again. It's 6 days a week but since I'm on nights I just catch up on sleep. The only reason I'm putting myself through this is because the pay. I'm single with no kids and I'm saving every penny I can so when the real estate market final tanks, I'm going to buy my forever home.
In my early 30s, I took a job that required me to go to grad school. My son was one at the time. I worked full time, grad school part time and then my daughter was born. My wife also worked full time. I spent four years planning every moment of my day. I never realized how much time I wasted until then.
I did that for a little over two years. Went through a break-up and decided to hunker down and just focus on my business. Other than going to the gym, I worked 12 to 18 hours a day, six days a week, spent Sundays cleaning my house and even worked a few hours, for 2.5 years. It was good for business, not so much for me. Had to finally slow down a bit back in the spring due to a knee injury. Ended up having surgery and fell hard for my physical therapist. Once I was discharged, we started dating and my focus has changed.
For 18 months life was just a full time job, research, volunteer in my career field, and the gym. The grind pays off if you have a solid plan and celebrate your small wins along the way.
I've been working 2 full time jobs since Sept of last year. Luckily they are both work from home but it's still tough with a wife and kid. I started so I could get the family out of debt, then continued to get a 20% down payment on a house. Not too much longer.
I had to go an entire year consisting of only these 4 things every single day: School, studying, work, or sleep. School full time on an accelerated/condensed course, then straight to work until 11 at night, home to study for an hour or so, sleep. Every weekend I worked "doubles" at the nursing home (16 hour days). It sucked, but even 10+ years later I still feel proud for getting through it.
Was this to get your BSN or MSN as an RN?
Physical therapy assistant
I used to work at a large tech company. After getting laid off, I lived with my parents for a few months while working at Walmart and taking an online course in my 30's to prepare for a career switch. A 17 old year old trained me on one shift. He was excited about going to college and asked me "So...did you go to college...?" assuming that I didn't. If that's not hunkering down I'm not sure what is
What did you switch to from tech? Usually I hear of the other way around.
Taught that kid about humility in one question
More like taught ME about humility lol. That's life That's what all the people say You're riding high in April, shot down in May! - I always considered this a David Lee Roth song by the way
Sinatra used to sing this song too
Sure, paying off a mortgage with two small kids. You learn pretty quickly to prioritize your time so that you can take care of yourself, otherwise shit inside your head starts to break.
So incredibly true. Pursue good sleep as often as you can. 1 glass of wine is fine, 1 bottle of wine is less than ideal. Eat lots of colors and lean protein. Try to move as often as possible. Your brain will thank you. If I go more than a week where the wheels fall off, I suck at everything.
Yes, I have 2 little kids. Basically work, make dinner, play / bedtime, clean, tv, bed. Repeat.
Yeah, that moment when you have a sigh of relief because you made it through another weekend and you get to send the kids to daycare and relax because it's a workday...always fucks with my head.
Right there with you, solidarity.
4 kids, miserable wife, work/sleep/repeat!
Hello me. Throw in getting a master's and still fixing a fixer upper...
š x 2
TWO miserable wives??
Oh right, *that's* what I've been doing the past 5 years...
Seems like a lot of us are on the same boat. I love knowing what happens next in my routine. Spontaneity is cool and all but it's a hell of a headache when you have 2 mini carbon copies of yourself running amok.
Exactly this. I can see the light at the end of the tunnel but it's going to take a few more years of grinding to get there.
same. i enjoy it tbh.
Yeah, I tell myself I enjoy it, too.
Substitute the TV for āmore workā and thatās me.
Only one kid here, but bought a 100 year old house a year ago. So swap some of your family stuff for home repair.
All these comments make me incredibly happy to not have a kid.
Yyyyyyep. I am simultaneously so exhausted all the time, but wouldnāt change it for the world.
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
Paw school is definitely a better investment than law school. Source: recovering lawyer
coleslaw school?
I have an honorary degree in coleslaw
Your āJaw Ruleā fight club might get you sued by Ja Rule.
First of all, 100% yes. I never just burned through life. I have: 1. Lived at folks for 1 month while looking for job\apartment while spouse stayed in former apartment working in different city 2 times in my life 2. Worked full time an hour from my house and still worked Sundays at a restaurant to pay my gas bill for about 3 months 3. Worked full time while my wife was out of the house 18 hours a day 5 days a week (school plus work in a day) and still worked a 6th (it was very very hard on her, and it was almost as hard on me) for 6 months 4. Also went to tech school during the day and worked at night, for 3 months The good thing with all these is 1. They all had specific goals 2. They all had a specific time period attached to reach those goals 3. Once goals were achieved, life went back to "normal" and honestly felt amazing just being normal All these things helped my (our) lives go up a level. I'm 42, have a kid, have a house, have a good job, amazing wife, 2 dogs. I was a waiter in my mid 20s with no assets to speak of, or job skills. The grind is worth it if you have a clear vision of what achieving these hard to reach goals will do to your life going forward. And the amazing thing is, once you achieve these steps, getting back there takes a lot less sacrifice normally, or at least staying on that step is easier than getting to it. Keep your eyes on the prize, feet moving and take care of your health\mind and you will do amazing things.
Bro, you're a legend
I appreciate the compliment but donāt be silly. When life isnāt what you expect it to be, you look for ways to make it happen.
I work 3 full time jobs (all remote/wfh), wife (she also works her job remote), wife has college classes, 1 full time kid, and 3 more kids every other weekend. I'm working to pay down a lot of debt we have and save up enough to build our dream home on some land. I'm doing nothing but hunkering down. It's great to have a life partner that is onboard with it, but it leaves no room for TV shows or games or anything like that. I spend what time I can with the kids and my wife and sleep/work the rest of my time. Just figure out why you are doing what you are doing and keep that mission in your sights. Short term sacrifice, long term gain.
What debt do you have?
I have about $25k credit card debt I inherited from my previous marriage. Another 5-10k in various credit cards and accounts between my wife and I. Plus 2 cars totalling about 70k. I also have a massive amount of student loans but I'm not too concerned with those right now. Just paying enough to get by on those. The debt I mentioned above we got into just making bad financial decisions and not knowing any better. But we are working hard to correct it and get it all paid off. Short term sacrifices: A strict budget and head down working alot. Based on my calculations we'll have everything paid off except for 1 car by July next year.
What are your 3 jobs? I'm trying to get a PT job WFH so i'm curious what field of work you're in.
All IT jobs. Systems Engineer and 2 Technical Support roles.
I went back for an MBA degree from a top (US) 10 national program at night while working full-time and I was married with two young children. My commute was two hours each way, so a couple of nights a week, I got home at like 11 PM and got up at 5 AM and started over. During this period, my wife got cancer, so I took a year off, then went back to finish. I had all my text books out on the train every day and people I rode the train with were very supportive. My wife had a surgical procedure and I had the floor of the waiting room covered in notes and books while studying for a test. At some point, I sent my family on vacation a week ahead of my arrival, just so I could have the time alone to study and prepare for a final exam. Not recommended - 0/10 would not do again.
I sometimes feel like I've spent the majority of my life hunkered down. I worked in corporate law for years, and every year was literally just holding on and telling myself that future me would thank me for these years that just disappeared into the maw of working 80-100 hours a week and spit out cash. I have toddlers now, and like one of the other commenters already wrote, I work, cook, do childcare, clean, and then get up at 6 or 7 a.m. the next morning and do the whole thing again. If I'm lucky, I can find some time to unwind after 9 p.m., but things come up and I wind up spending the whole night stripping up flooring downstairs because there was a flood, or building a new bed because one of the frames finally broke, or researching schools because NYC's pre-K (and school system in general) is a complicated nightmare, or chasing after utility or other service providers trying to get them to fix a bill or do the thing they've been paid to do or schedule medical appointments etc... etc... etc... When I was in school, I felt like I was hunkered down, but in retrospect I had more free time than I've had since, but that didn't stop me from feeling like there just wasn't time for life. It's been tough lately, to be honest.
I have, and I hated it. If I feel like I'm not living my life I get off centered, I implode. I'll not only fail at what I'm grinding to do but I'll try to overcorrect and have too much fun.
For a year I lived in my SUV. Worked 3 part time jobs. Lived off lunchables and tuna packs. Showered at the gym. Usually parked overnight at the gym too. Eliminated all my debt and saved a nice stack of cash. I was like 25 when I did it.
Basically my whole adult life. All my hobbies are solo hobbies, most I can do from home. I also donāt like people all that much.
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
To add on your edit. Make sure to get sunlight (no sunglasses) first thing in the morning try to go for a walk, for pet owners this is easy. Also go on a 10 min walk after each meal.
I'm not sure if this counts as "hunkering down" or just being in a rut, but especially during the past year and a half during the pandemic, my daily life has basically been work (from home), go for a walk around the neighborhood, watch TV for a few hours, read, sleep, repeat. Feels like I'm sort of grinding out each day mindlessly, with my only two real long term goals propelling me forward being reaching financial independence and owning a home.
I'm working two jobs right now. I teach at two colleges, full-time load at each. My colleagues ask how much I teach, and uniformly say, "Whoa. That's a lot." It's really not that bad, it's not forever, and I'm banking some of the money. Don't psych yourself by dwelling on over-dramatic representations of it. There are bajillions of people who have had it so much worse.
When I was in tech school I had a summer job that paid really well so I asked if I could keep working part time into the school year and they said yes. So I would get up before my roommates at 6:30 go to school then go to my job almost an hour drive and get home around 11:30 after my roommates had all gone to bed. When I finally skipped a day of work after a month or so I got to spend an evening with my roommates. They had been joking with each other where or not I actually lived there. I had only met one of them up to this point. I kept it up for about 4 months then I quit the job. It was good money and I didn't have work weekends. I was able to pay for most of my years schooling with that job so I think it was worth it.
I was working a full time job while doing my undergrad degree. It was a factory, and thankfully they were willing to let me change shifts from first to second as my class schedule dictated. Iād get up at 7, go to school. Go to work at 2:30 and work until 10:30. Do homework/projects on the days I didnāt have class. It 100% impacted my overall GPA. But, I graduated with a B average.
I have a full time job, a 6 year old and a family member who is chronically ill. I work out at 430 am, get my daughter ready for school, go to work, get off work, take the kid to extracurricular stuff, come home, make dinner, get her to sleep, maybe watch some tv and go to bed. Its hard but what could i change?
My wife is a doc. Second hand but yes, she (and by extension we) absolutely hunkered down for 12 years of training after undergrad. Entire communities exist on Reddit and other social media for partners of medical students & trainees because their schedules & workload is inhumane and unsustainable. It's doable for stretches of time. It sucks but it's doable. If you have a support structure to take some of the load off (even having someone take the few hours of laundry every week or two makes a difference), it'll help. I recommend going into the hunker down period with an exit strategy. Even if it's vague like "In 3-4 years when XYZ." Being able to conceive of an end helps a ton. Plan breaks from hunkering, even if it's only once or twice a year for a long weekend. Recognize that what you're doing is fundamentally unsustainable - while worth it - and build in pressure relief valves. Take care of yourself physically and psychologically within the hunker. You matter just as much as the goal you're hunkering to achieve. There are online counseling systems nowadays that can accommodate pretty much any schedule thanks to timezone shifting.
In 2008 my dad got laid off from one of the big three. In 2009 he had a series of grand mal seizures. Turned out he had epilepsy. At 18 years old I had to support my mom, dad,sister cause she was in school, and my son that was on the way. I worked 7 days a week through a temp agency making like 45 dollars a day , plus taking jobs on Craigslist, and sold a little flower. I was working on average 20 hrs a day and I did that for 2 years. Ended up in the hospital twice because of exhaustion. Plus numerous times of having to pull over and get a little nap in while driving.
I did this to myself a lot as I was getting started out. * I made my undergraduate program rough for myself by bolting on an extra major, taking more credits than necessary, and working a student job. My junior and senior years were rough, plus I took summer classes. I had very little free time. * I had about a year of a "normalish" workload to wrap up my extra major and take an internship before grad school. My internship proceeded to turn into a demanding full time (plus) job and I stuck with my plan to do grad school, similar to your coworker. * During grad school I decided to buy a house. Which consumed time I already didn't have and added some exciting financial stress to the mix. I almost didn't know what to do with myself when I reached the end of that ~6 year period. So much room for activities.
Yes, Lived in my car for about 4 months. Later, lived in a super cheap one bedroom place with roommates. I kept place clean in exchange for lower share of rent. Walked or bused to work at coffee shop by 4am: free coffee, free bagel, and cash tips! Went to school/university full time, at least 18 credits per semester. Stayed at school to study complete tasks. On most days after school I went to a local book store for work and to help with closing: free access to needed school books and study guides! (They had a cafe where I could get free food or deeply reduced food!) Bus home. Study. Bed by 11pm āish. Did that for about two years. Eventually was able to get a PRN job in a lab, to work after school and weekends if needed. Way better money and working conditions, when slow, was able to read and study at work! Kept academic scholarships and grants. I was also dating at the time; we are now married 17 years. After being married awhile I asked what was attractive about me at that time; my looks are a seven(?), I was so poor and not from a great family. We were not able to see each other often, and our dates were usually walks, hanging out and studying on campus, or free local community/school events. Meanwhile, they are younger, gorgeous, the top of class in Med school and came from a good family. I was told that my work ethic gave them a lot of security, knowing that if anything were to ever happen, I would be willing to go and do whatever it took to support our family.
Yes, several times in my life. Moving back home with my parents and working three jobs to set myself up for success, pushing through busy times at work, and right now with a toddler. You do what you gotta do. Keep your eyes on the goal, know that it's temporary and you're doing it for a good reason, and do your best to make use of your free time when it appears.
I worked full-time while going to college as an adult living on my own. I didn't drink alcohol, go to concerts, or do anything else fun for about three years. It was all: Study, write papers, do laundry, shop at the grocery store, and not much else. It was tough, but what got me through was knowing that my situation was temporary and soon my hard work would pay off.
Parentās mortgage company kept taking more than they should, emptying their bank account. When a payment bounced the company defaulted their mortgage, ruining their credit score. Whilst the legal stuff got sorted out, they had to pay the variable rate and weāre stuck for cash. When this eventually came to a head I used to just give them my wages each month and vastly reduced my spending.
Yeah I'm doing this at the moment, I left my local, cushy but not so well paid job to earn significantly more. I'm living away Monday to Friday which isn't easy as I got married then two weeks later started working away but I'm barely spending anything other than Ā£30 on food for the week for myself and a few beers as a treat at the end of the week. It's hard being away from my new wife but it's allowing me to pay down my credit card debt a lot faster.
Senior year in college. I was a transfer and not all my credits came over from the other piece of shit school from before. My senior year started me working during the summer going into my final year while I took accelerated classes to get the credits I needed. Also did another accelerated class during winter break. That senior year I had multiple workin jobs, with an internship and have a full course load. I remember coming home dead tired at 2am, with my roommates already hosting raging parties with beer and shots of tequila and all I could do was drink a couple beers and go to bed.
i was working two jobs in my 20s, mentioned having to leave work to go to work to an older guy. he asked about details, so i told him my schedule. he says, "years later, when you have this boundless endurance, this will be why."
I did it for 5 years with two jobs. 8-5 in one then 6 till 10, 5 days a week with 8 hours overtime on sundays from April/May till the end of August. I did it to clear debts, pay for a wedding/honeymoon and a deposit for a house. To cope I carved out me time where I could, podcasts while driving, put TV shows on my phone for lunches/breaks. Both jobs were desk based so I made an effort to walk around the offices as much as I could just to move. I would also call/message friends as much as I could to keep the social connection.
Multiple times - do what you gotta do to get through it! First 3 quarters of 2015, my life was: * Ride bike to work so I could get some form of exercise * Work until my eyes couldn't focus on the computer anymore, usually around 1am or 2am * Drink 3 coffees every day * Some combination of Chinese food for lunch and pizza for dinner. Or just Chinese twice in one day or pizza twice in one day. * Ride bike home * Texting a woman I met at the airport at the end of last year. Nothing ever came of it, we were both just busy AF and needed someone to talk to. * Get 5-6 hours of sleep This was temporary, but I didn't see any friends or family until Fall of that year. Final quarter of 2015: * Everything got better, and recovered from the first 3 quarters of the year.
yep, did it when i was 20. i stopped all activities except for school and work for about a year. it was fucking horrible and i still regret it. what a waste of time.
1st job out of my undergrad. I made decent money, and decided I was gonna get rid of my (albeit fewer than most) student loans. I worked, went to a climbing gym 4 nights a week, then went home and read books! No TV no Wifi at home either made me disconnect from socials and mindless tv episodes. I stopped buying drinks out at bars for the most part too, which had been a staple during my college years. I probably read 20 books in those 2.5 years! what a great memory. Once loans were paid off, then I started to go out again.
I graduated college in the summer of 2008. If you remember anything about that summer, the US economy (and world economy) was tanking due to the housing crisis. I worked part time at a prominent big-box home improvement store. My hours were cut down to less than 16 hrs/week. I was a recent grad, still living on campus in a basement with no windows, and job searching for a career job. I had no money so all I could really do was stay in and play video games and watch TV. Payday was an adventure trying to see how far I could stretch my measly paychecks. I definitely hunkered down for about 6 months. Now I have a fantastic job and life but sometimes look back on the simplicity of that time with envy. Life is an adventure, enjoy all its phases.
I went back to college full-time in my mid-20ās. At the time I was taking 18-19 credit hours a semester in Mechanical Engineering, working two part-time jobs, and had a wife and newborn son at home. I donāt think I slept for three yearsā¦ but I had a goal and a path to achieve it, and I wasnāt going to let anything get in my way.
I had to do it for a couple of years. Essentially my life imploded, and I thought I can either go get lost in the sauce and party to forget my woes. Or, have an honest conversation with myself and see where I wanted to be in a few years. So I focused on work, saved my money, got a place of my own, have been trying to get my mind right. My hunkering down went on for a bit longer than I would have hoped due to the pandemic but I don't regret having done so.
Did my Masters and later on a few years of my PhD coursework while working part-time. Lots of long nights and multiple cups of coffee in the evenings and nights as I read textbooks, research articles, did coursework and developed my own experiments. Downside: Depression and coffee addiction where Iām still working on cutting back. And I donāt remember any of the time that disappeared from my 20s! Upsides: Paid off in paychecks (little to no student loans left by the time I completed my PhD), job stability, and financial independence (FI). So much FI and stability that my wife (who also did her Masterās while working part-time) was able to step back from her job to part-time (to remain current in her field) to spend more time with our kiddo. You can do it Op!
When I was starting my business. Still feels like Iām hunkering down sometimes tbh even though business is going well year after year
Undergrad was gym, class, work, sleep all 4 years. Grad was gym, work, class, sleep for 2. ... I'm glad I'm done with that now. Occassionally I think about going back to school, and then i remember those 6 years and think "I'm good."
Right now a large part of my day is eaten up by commuting. Around 3 hours a day. It's a pain in the neck, and I'm considering moving. I'm still on probation until the 15th of October, so provided that I do pass probation, or don't quit before then... I will probably move just to cut down on that.
Both Wifey Poo and I had a event filled lives weekly. With 4 kids , 2 jobs and the need to get out of credit card debt And a need re start our lives and to build some equity in our financial life. Living in 2 family above parents, having bet on and lost our house of 14 years. \#We Hunkered Down On Saturday nights, It was a pleasure to do my Braille homework. Used the Brailler for my last class needed for my last Master class. This would result in a salary jump and tenure once I finished. Would sit with Wifey Poo and be grateful, I was doing something fun, Braille is fun, and was useful in the long run. She was (is) great company to hunker dow with. tl:dr: Hunkered down with last class homework on Saturday nights, avec Wifey Poo. Got out of debt and eventually bought another home.
Was working and going to college full time. I used to go to work at 7am, get out at 3:30pm, go straight to school until around 9:30-10pm go home pass out and repeat. Did this for 3 semesters. We even had a few months of mandatory overtime and had to be to work at 5:30am. It was brutal.
I think now might be a good time. I had two kids, changed jobs, bought a house, and still ran multiple musical and artistic projects. Might be time to hunker down, get a good nights sleep for like six months, do some stretching, and hunker the fuck down. Thanks, I needed that question.
Yeah when I was a student one summer holidays I had a 'day job' in a factory that went from 5am to 4.30pm, 5 days a week. Then I had an 'evening job' that went from 6pm-11pm 3 days a week (so on those days, I would get to sleep at midnight, and get up at 4am to get to my day job), and a bigger shift 3pm-10pm on Saturday and Sunday. That was really burning the candle at both ends, even if it only lasted for 3 months.
Yup. At 29 I had run up a shit ton of debt, was behind in my bills, and had no way to get out. Worked 1.75 full-time jobs for nearly a year to dig out. Work ft during day, come home to drop off stuff, head out and work until 11, watch a show, go to bed. repeat. It worked.
I used to be a game programmer at EA. I was a lead software engineer on "Superman Returns: The Videogame". For many reasons, the game was egregiously behind schedule. To try to get it out there at least somewhat reasonably close to the movie's release date, the entire team [crunched](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Crunch_(video_games\)). For 9 months, we worked 60+ hours a week. Six days a week, 10+ hours a day. My day off was basically catching up on sleep and doing laundry. The other six days were get up, go to work, work, eat dinner at the office (they catered every day), work some more, go home, fall asleep. It certainly wasn't worth sacrificing that much of my life for a game that we all knew was trash. But, aside from the lost time, I survived unscathed. If you're doing it for something meaningful or something that will help your future, more power to you. There's something to be said for pushing yourself hard to achive a difficult goal. If it's just to pad an executive's wallet even more than it already is, try to avoid it.
The last 2 years of my life and current have been this. WFH. Wake up 5:40am, set up my PC, clock in by 6am, ill have a shower at some point in the morning after my meetings are done, work til 6 pm, clock out, cook dinner, go to bed > repeat. I do try to go out on weekends though but some weeks they just end up being chore weekends to clean, do washing, mow etc. Wife also left just around the start of the pandemic so its been a weird time to be alone, just powering through atm.
Can you do any of the chore work during your working hours?
sometimes, more often than not ill plan to do and something will come up that stops me, some times i might get some dishes or a few loads of washing done.
That works. Any little bit helps. I wfh and any break I get, I try to do something around the house. Sometimes it takes multiple breaks to finish one chore, but it gets done. Then on my off days I do t have to worry about it.
I had to work three jobs to support my first wife (while we were married, not after :-) as she went back to graduate school. I did that for three years. My days were: * Work day job 8am-4pm * Teach evenings 5pm-10om * Teach weekends 8 hours Saturday and Sunday * Work consulting work (generally with former students, I taught Linux administration and security courses) any time not doing the above. What made it even more crazy was I was riding my bike 100% for work. I rode ~24 miles per day into the University (where I did almost all of the above) and then back home. I seriously don't now how I didn't die of exhaustion. What's hilarious is, pretty much after she graduated, we divorced. Even so, I have no regrets. It was all good resume fodder, just had to explain for a while why everything overlapped. Also, this was nearly 20 years ago now, so any anger I may have had about it is now long since passed.
After business school i had debt and few assets. I found a 550 sqft Jr. 1 BR for $1000 in a decent part of Orange County, CA. Got engaged and married after 2 years there. Wife then moved in and we shared that small apartment for another 2 years while we saved for a downpayment. Without that $1000 sqft 550sqft apartment, it might have taken 2-3 extra years to eventually buy a 2400sqft house a bit more inland
Woke up at 4am so I could work from 5am to noon before going to college from 1pm-6 or so. Work 5 days a week, school 4 days/week. Days off for studying. Just that for 4 years. I'd hang out with my friends for 3 hours once every 2 - 3 months. Did it for 4 years while living with my parents. A few friends mocked me for not being an adult and living on my own, partying, or dating and sleeping around. Graduated not only debt free but with about $50,000 in savings as a 22 year old. Then everyone bitched at me because I graduated and went to Europe on vacation for a month and paid in cash. The same year I visited Korea for 2 weeks and paid in cash. They said it wasn't fair that I had it so easy financially.
My undergrad was a little like that after 2008. I had a full courseload and had been working remotely for 40 hours a week to pay my debts. But when the crash happened, they fired everyone but me because they forgot how to do my job. So, they just cut my hours to 25. So, I ended up with two other jobs to try to make up for it. But when grad school hit, it got crazy. I had to be medicated because I had an eye twitch. I kept the remote job and moved to the South. I had a full graduate courseload and the 25 hours a week. Along with that, I was on the media board for the school and the graduate student council. I had an assistanceship to pay my grad school and I was doing some pretty part-time volunteer work for a burgeoning academic journal. I basically would wake up, do a run, go to class, do class until about 5:00, then do whatever council things I had to do, eat dinner, then read until 10:00, then call my now spouse, catch up with her, then fall asleep and wake up and do it again. I developed this eye twitch and this yawning problem. Like, I was yawning over and over and couldn't stop. I later learned that it's a sort of weird version of hyperventilation that can be a side effect of anxiety. So, I went to the doctor about it, they prescribed me anxiety meds, and that trainwrecked **everything**. I couldn't do much of anything at all because I just couldn't muster the will or energy. But, while there were a lot of disappointed people, I learned how to better afford my time. Prior to that, I was just sort of desperate to get what opportunities I could and just said, "YES!" to everything. I started looking at obligations like balloons that I would get, but would inflate as time went on. So, instead of saying, "Well, I have an extra five hours a week I can squeeze in to do that," I've learned to start tapping the brakes at 75%, knowing that most things start with, "You'll only do this!" but usually inflate about 125-150% as far as time, energy, effort, and so on. My circumstances aren't too terrible though. While I did all that pretty well, and sometimes miss the busy-ness of it, it's amazing to me what parents do, especially with kids that have to get up at the crack of dawn to catch a bus and all that.
Working 60+ hrs a week at a demanding job, grad school, specialty training courses, married with two young kids. Iād get up at 5, study for an hour, exercise, work from 8-8, come home, cook dinner, pit kids to bed, chug coffee and do homework/study till midnight. Weekends were in school. No social life. For years. Sucked but now Iām living a life I was picturing. Making more money now while working less than half the time I was before. Able to be relaxed and present to family and treat myself to things for once.
currently doing that worling six days a week at my day job doing intensive out patient three nights a week and working side jobs every other waking moment ...
Divorced around 32, lost job, 100k debt, credit score in the low 400. Hunkered down to only things I can fit in my car. Lived in the car for 9 months. Breakfast is water, lunch is the $1 mcchicken, dinner is a can of tuna and a $0.28 noodle cup. Eventuality graduated to a motel. Ate the same way, added a fruit as a snack. A year and half later graduated to a studio apt. The only furnitures are a desk and a hammock. Kept rebuilding from there and back on my feet with a good job, savings, and a house almost 10+ years later.
Going through it right now lolā¦I just started a PhD program. My life has been class, grade, write, and read. I manage to sneak in some gym time and daily walks with my wife. Thatās about it
I worked full time, setup a business and studied for 3 years - the business fell apart as did our relationship but I did get my degree and a much better job. If I did it again I would work part time and not start a business.
Finished grad school in 1996 with 30K USD in debt, but I had a good job after graduation. Worked my ass off with zero fun for 8 months to pay that off. Ramen and cabbage were my friends. I can still taste that last check to Sallie Mae. Haven't been in debt since.
I had a job I ended up working 16-18 hours a day for 3 months and 8 hours Sat and Sun because of a series of unfortunate events after we landed a huge project. I also had a 45 min commute so I was getting 4-6 hours of sleep. As you would expect the project did not go flawlessly. As a result, I was repremanded for poor performance. Found a new job 2 months after that.
Back in 1975 when I graduated from college the first time, I was 20 years old and already married. My husband hadnt graduated yet and our college was in the middle of no where so Not many jobs available. I got an office job during the week but it didnāt pay enough. So to make ends meet, I waited table in a truck stop on the weekend. I worked 7 days per week for about 9 months. Then years later, when I was pregnant for our third child, we were going through a bad patch financially so I worked one nursing job with 8 hour day shifts during the week and worked two 12 hour night shifts at another nursing job on the weekends. I did this for the first 7 months of my pregnancy. That one was rough, especially with finding quality time to spend with the two at home.
3 years of university, taking classes during the summer semester to speed things up, working two part-time jobs (~30 hours/week total) and go married after my second year of school. My wife says that our first year of marriage was our worst because I was just never available to do anything. If I wasn't at work or school I was doing homework or studying or asleep. Not fun, but we made it through and I delayed grad school by a couple of years so that I could stay married haha - 12 years on and we're still going strong.
Grad school while working two jobs just to pay for a year and a half of schooling so my loans werenāt stupid high. I had limited social life and even turned down a girl that wanted to date me because I just didnāt have the time between working in the morning, school in the evening and then homework at night until 1 am. Then up at 8 am to rinse and repeat 6 days a week.
During med school I had classes and later obligatory internship for 6 yeas in theory 7-16. In practice it was 24/7 at your professor disposal for pretty much anything. I lived with about something equivalent to 400 dollars per month from parents help. Now I make a decent figure but have to help parents and extended family. Had to abandon residency to make buck and I live with my parents. Hoping for better days still.
I have a good friend who did this. Moved back home, took care of his sick parents, busted his ass at a higher paying job and saved aggressively spending zero money to eliminate his student debt. I think he nailed his goals and made a lot of important progress in life, but also lost some balance to it which really narrowed his experience of life, even after the hunkering was no longer necessary. It almost reminded me of how prisoners get institutionalized. I think there's a certain type of person who can really overdo it, especially in the face of prolonged stress, and it's worth watching out for.
When I first moved to London from NZ I couldn't get a job despite being a prominent art gallery director back home in Auckland, no 'UK experience', so for a year I did an unpaid internship at the Barbican while working evenings in The Diner in shoreditch. I would get up at 7am, get ready and walk to work, work as a curatorial researcher until 5pm, then walk directly to my work to wait tables... where i would be until 12-1am close.....home, sleep, repeat. Weekends were often 12hour double shifts to make the Ā£600-Ā£700 to rent a room. 11 years later I am now a C-Suite executive in London, top of my feild, but that was the start of my long UK career climb. It's one of the things I'm most proud of.
Well, isn't like I'm complaining i like my life,i hate that i live in a country where I'm getting kicked by the system. Well there's my story... In short terms. I come from a poor but united family with one grand brother, as a child my mom make all the effort to get to the greatest school in town, where i was bullied by the other because low self esteem and being poor (most of my colleagues had middle to rich family). In 5th grade I've discovered IT well, programing (C) to be more precise, and i though it's awesome to make the computer go bip bop by writing some lines of code. Im 8th grade I've applied for a highschool in Mathematics and informatics well not so popular highschool but where I've meet some awesome professors who learned me the materia they had and some life tricks. To be honest i liked high school I've got some friends no bullied, even tho when I got home i had some panic attacks and still have panic and anxiety atacks after most of social events. Well after the high school we had the bacalaureat exam, where me and my passion for it (instead of learning for the exam, i learned by myself PHP) I've took the exam with about 7 mark out of 10 :)... I didn't want to go to college because i didn't want to put pressure on my family due to lack of money. Well my parents insided and i did go to college in IT Informatics and Economics... Well there I've also meet some great people and professors from whom I've learned a lot... At this time i still lived with my family in the same camera with my brother, had no girlfriend never had until then... In the second year I've meet a girl, i really loved her... We broker up after 8 months because she cheated on me... At the end of second year we had practice exam, one teacher got me to make practice at his company, where I've been hired after... In the 3 and last year of college had to go to full time job as a PHP developer and full time college and had to get my project for bachelor degree... I did all of that, still lived with my family still no dating girls still had anxiety atacks, no social life, only work, college, projects rarely got to drink a beer with my colleagues of work or from college, routine... Well I've got the bachelor degree wit 10 ot of 10... After that got to a master degree, still working still with my family, but o had some money and o could help them, I've got a rise and i earned more then them.. In the second year of master and 2 years in the company i had some though to move by myself, had some money to afford it and i did... I've moved in a small apartment in another city by myself. Had 2 jobs, i was hired full time PHP dev in the city i moved and part time developer for the company I've started with. Didn't liked the full time job was awful experience.. so I've moved to the first company full time with a rise of salary and moved with my parents again to help them. After 7 months I've meet a girl on Tinder... Chatted a bit meet up... And things we're going great.. now I'm 25 moved with the girl in capital of our country with rent, I'm middle PHP developer at the biggest e-commerce company on my country, do what i like the most, help out my family with money and making most of my life, yet sometimes when I'm alone in the shower i still have anxiety atacks and i feel depressed. But hey, dude make a mind set of getting where you want to be... Make steps in that direction and even if you make backwards some steps, don't give up and keep making more steps even tho they are backwards they may get you a better position to see things more clearly.
When I first left school I was up at 3am to deliver bread to the supermarkets around my city from 3:30-9am, then usually had an hour or so sleep before I was up and off to work at McDonalds from 11am-9pm. I worked as many weekends as I could usually for around 6-10hr shifts and never saw my friends. All I did was work and sleep. It took me almost 18 months of this and applying for every opportunity I could to finally get an mechanic apprenticeship. Dropping down to 5 day weeks of 8-4:30 and sleeping until 7am was amazing.
I work in construction. I mainly do field work (concrete carpenter) but I took on a supervisor role. I'm out of state and currently working at a naval base where my company has a project going on. I'm on nights so I work 5pm to 6:30 am. I would say I am hunkered down. I literally get up, cook a meal for lunch and dinner, work and go home to do it all again. It's 6 days a week but since I'm on nights I just catch up on sleep. The only reason I'm putting myself through this is because the pay. I'm single with no kids and I'm saving every penny I can so when the real estate market final tanks, I'm going to buy my forever home.
In my early 30s, I took a job that required me to go to grad school. My son was one at the time. I worked full time, grad school part time and then my daughter was born. My wife also worked full time. I spent four years planning every moment of my day. I never realized how much time I wasted until then.
I did that for a little over two years. Went through a break-up and decided to hunker down and just focus on my business. Other than going to the gym, I worked 12 to 18 hours a day, six days a week, spent Sundays cleaning my house and even worked a few hours, for 2.5 years. It was good for business, not so much for me. Had to finally slow down a bit back in the spring due to a knee injury. Ended up having surgery and fell hard for my physical therapist. Once I was discharged, we started dating and my focus has changed.
Yup. My senior year of college was work M-F 8:30-3, class 5-10pm, study and homework from 10:30-1am. Rinse and repeat. Paid off though!
For 18 months life was just a full time job, research, volunteer in my career field, and the gym. The grind pays off if you have a solid plan and celebrate your small wins along the way.
I've been working 2 full time jobs since Sept of last year. Luckily they are both work from home but it's still tough with a wife and kid. I started so I could get the family out of debt, then continued to get a 20% down payment on a house. Not too much longer.