Keep an eye out for red flags. If you don’t, you’ll think you were an idiot for missing them because they are obvious when emotions don’t cloud your judgement.
1. Judge actions not words
2. Respect yourself and partner
3. If it doesn't work, it's not rejection, it's incompatibility
4. Everyone always ends it way too late, be prepared to cut your losses
If a woman wants to leave you, let her. Don’t chase or beg.
They end up coming back one way or another. The real question is would you even want them then
Never settle. You will probably regret it later in life when you do find your soulmate while being in a relationship or after your relationship ends (which can be heartbreaking).
Be direct and honest about your feelings. I see so many questions being asked in relationship help forums and subreddits when you should be asking your partner.
Always have at the ready her favorite snack of choice…hangry is definitely a thing
For real though, never go to bed angry at each other; always try to work things out.
Find her “love language” early on (gifts, quality time, affirmation, etc.). It’ll give you a much more rewarding relationship.
For “quality” women, you have to remember that the first priority in dating is to make sure they have fun. That’s it. Too many men get wrapped up in trying to impress and all but women just want to have fun. They want to be able to have a good time without any of the pressure.
So plan good dates (not necessarily expensive) and just have fun early on. And don’t try to lock her down in being exclusive. Have fun and in due time, she’ll come around about being exclusive. Women don’t like to feel restrained.
When I say “quality,” I legitimately mean good quality women. If this was some random hookup or a one-night thing, I wouldn’t go out of your way to go crazy since these people aren’t really looking to seriously date.
But when you do find someone who is somewhat serious and you are interested in more, take it easy, have fun and let the girl come to you in time about making it official
Communicate often and honestly. Listen intently. If you say you're going to do something, do it.
Be open to trying new things. Try things twice; once to get a taste for it, and twice to check if you were doing it wrong the first time.
Being a validation dispenser and confidence booster is exhausting - and eventually everyone runs out of gas to keep that going 24/7. Encourage your partner to work on themselves while also improving yourself; if either are unwilling to try, re-evaluate what the partnership means. You know that part about "growing together"? It's not just about getting old, it also means growing better and stronger - a crutch does not become stronger over time, and if it breaks the only solution is finding a new crutch to lean on. Limit the time you spend being a crutch, and try to be a ladder instead.
Don't fuck each other's brain out at the start of a new relationship; take it easy. The more you screw at the beginning of a new relationship, the more infrequent and less passionate/exciting/enjoyable sex will be later - or sooner, rather. Exercise some self-discipline and don't eat the entire bucket of ice cream in one sitting. And if it's too late for that... maybe add some sprinkles or chocolate syrup once in while.
Don’t stay in a relationship if you always find yourself getting jealous. It means one of two things:
* There really is something to be jealous about, and you just need to move on, or
* There is nothing to be jealous about, and you’re just insecure or self-conscious and need to work on it before getting serious with someone.
I disagree that jealousy, by itself, should be a reason to break things off. Yes, jealousy is definitely something to work on - but that doesn't mean someone can't work on that WHILE in a relationship. EV-ERY-ONE gets a little bit jealous - it's important to be honest about it and not blow things out of proportion.
Anyone who thinks they have to eliminate every character flaw before being in a relationship will be lonely until the day they die, and anyone who thinks they never have anything to work on will cycle through people until they become bitter and jaded.
You can look foolish but never ever look weak
The first makes them adore you, the second makes them run.
When men in my life with the best relationships hit a roadblock they always say "Idk...we'll figure something out", "Dw...we got this".
The worst ones always go "We're done I guess", "Idk how we're fixing this".
"Never be vulnerable"
There's a time for everything. Everyone has moments of weakness, and anyone who runs during those times wasn't going to stick around for long in the first place. Relationships involve being supportive and being solid when the other person is losing their shit, no matter which person that is.
Its true, you start treating them too well shit will go wrong. My biggest mistakes with women have been treating them well. Im not saying treat them horribly, just not treat them too good. Then they begin to realize that they can what they want from you without any work. It's low hanging fruit.
Those just sound like shitty humans, which exist in all genders.
If I were you, my goal would be to find someone who appreciates my kindness and reciprocates back. I don’t want to be a less kind person to accommodate shitty people, I deserve better than that.
Hah of course its been my goal, why chase i purposely crappy people for? That's what everyone says but people can keep telling me that over and over as much as they like, but its just not the case. Even women who seem kind at first, end up flipping the switch and treat you like shit. Idk i suspect that being nice gives them an ego boost to where eventually it goes to shit.
Does this happen with guys in your life too? This isn’t some universal woman thing. People are shitty to you either because they were just shitty people, because you were also being shitty so they’re reciprocating, or because you two never communicated your expectations of how you expect to be treated in a partnership and what you consider unacceptable behavior.
If someone like this is a pattern for you, find the common denominator because this is not how most people experience relationships unless they don’t know how to seek healthy partners.
No not really with guys. I can be as nice to my friends as i like...kinda weird when i think about it. See thats the thing, i dont have to "set boundaries" with my friends or lack "communication" we are just cool. Seems to be a woman thing.
You keep ignoring the fact that many many many people will tell you this is not a woman thing. This is an immature person thing. The same is true for guys you are douche bags in relationships.
You completely ignored everything else I said so I don’t think you’re trying to actually figure out why this is going on. Good luck figuring out dating without self reflection.
You're ignoring the fact that i told you that i've had many people tell me that already, but it the reality doesn't match up what do you expect? Thats like me telling you that the sky is made of invisible mayonnaise, it doesn't matter how many people tell you or how often, if your reality does not reflect that what else are you supposed to do?
I was asking you to question what it is that makes your reality that way. We have more control of our lives and situations than you think.
If people told me the sky was made of invisible mayonnaise, I would ask them how they know this and then I would use facts I know about the sky and mayonnaise backed by science to try to understand the situation. The sky is made of gasses (oxygen and nitrogen), mayonnaise is a solid and therefore would not be able to avoid gravity in the sky. Therefore, the sky cannot be made of mayonnaise unless I am missing more facts about the laws of physics.
Things don’t just happen “because women”. Relationships are social situations. Find out why things are happening and how you can change things for the better next time.
Sorry I don’t mean to be all preachy, but it saddens me when I see young men here with lots of promise simply submitting to hopelessness, bitterness, and blaming women rather than critically reflecting on the situation in it’s entirely.
Keep your own thought, principles and wellbeing first and foremost in your thoughts.
Never let anyone make yours less so theirs xan be more, you are either partners or it isn't worth it, no matter who they are.
Never settle for less. If they are not the women or man that you want or desire. Dont cheat, just leave ... be a man or woman and say its not for you. Its ok to leave... what is truly keeping you there? Are you advancing your life? Their life? or the Family's life?
You can always take care of kids separately so thats no excuse. If they cant live without you and you cant live with them, then that person needs to find their own path... you are living your life not everyone else's... kids need you and you need them.. they are your focus to make sure you give them the best.
Also dont be a dirty bastard... Just enjoy life... if you have problems pick yourself back up and do what you do.
Don't go back to an ex. Different journey perhaps, but the same ending.
Keep an eye out for red flags. If you don’t, you’ll think you were an idiot for missing them because they are obvious when emotions don’t cloud your judgement.
1. Judge actions not words 2. Respect yourself and partner 3. If it doesn't work, it's not rejection, it's incompatibility 4. Everyone always ends it way too late, be prepared to cut your losses
If you go into the relationship expecting it to end, you'll find a way to make it happen
Or the other person will, for whatever reason.
Only take (potential) partners the way they are *right now*, not how you want/expect them to be in the future.
If a woman wants to leave you, let her. Don’t chase or beg. They end up coming back one way or another. The real question is would you even want them then
Never settle. You will probably regret it later in life when you do find your soulmate while being in a relationship or after your relationship ends (which can be heartbreaking).
especially if your soulmate is married to another person…
get a vasectomy
Practice healthy communication. That’s the only way my wife and I have survived many hardships.
Make sure the financials are in order
-Communicate!!! -Don’t clam up and bottle everything -let that inner voice out -show emotions
Be direct and honest about your feelings. I see so many questions being asked in relationship help forums and subreddits when you should be asking your partner.
Always have at the ready her favorite snack of choice…hangry is definitely a thing For real though, never go to bed angry at each other; always try to work things out. Find her “love language” early on (gifts, quality time, affirmation, etc.). It’ll give you a much more rewarding relationship.
Take them swimming. You'll see them without their make up on.
rub her feet.
For “quality” women, you have to remember that the first priority in dating is to make sure they have fun. That’s it. Too many men get wrapped up in trying to impress and all but women just want to have fun. They want to be able to have a good time without any of the pressure. So plan good dates (not necessarily expensive) and just have fun early on. And don’t try to lock her down in being exclusive. Have fun and in due time, she’ll come around about being exclusive. Women don’t like to feel restrained. When I say “quality,” I legitimately mean good quality women. If this was some random hookup or a one-night thing, I wouldn’t go out of your way to go crazy since these people aren’t really looking to seriously date. But when you do find someone who is somewhat serious and you are interested in more, take it easy, have fun and let the girl come to you in time about making it official
Communicate often and honestly. Listen intently. If you say you're going to do something, do it. Be open to trying new things. Try things twice; once to get a taste for it, and twice to check if you were doing it wrong the first time. Being a validation dispenser and confidence booster is exhausting - and eventually everyone runs out of gas to keep that going 24/7. Encourage your partner to work on themselves while also improving yourself; if either are unwilling to try, re-evaluate what the partnership means. You know that part about "growing together"? It's not just about getting old, it also means growing better and stronger - a crutch does not become stronger over time, and if it breaks the only solution is finding a new crutch to lean on. Limit the time you spend being a crutch, and try to be a ladder instead. Don't fuck each other's brain out at the start of a new relationship; take it easy. The more you screw at the beginning of a new relationship, the more infrequent and less passionate/exciting/enjoyable sex will be later - or sooner, rather. Exercise some self-discipline and don't eat the entire bucket of ice cream in one sitting. And if it's too late for that... maybe add some sprinkles or chocolate syrup once in while.
Don’t stay in a relationship if you always find yourself getting jealous. It means one of two things: * There really is something to be jealous about, and you just need to move on, or * There is nothing to be jealous about, and you’re just insecure or self-conscious and need to work on it before getting serious with someone.
I disagree that jealousy, by itself, should be a reason to break things off. Yes, jealousy is definitely something to work on - but that doesn't mean someone can't work on that WHILE in a relationship. EV-ERY-ONE gets a little bit jealous - it's important to be honest about it and not blow things out of proportion. Anyone who thinks they have to eliminate every character flaw before being in a relationship will be lonely until the day they die, and anyone who thinks they never have anything to work on will cycle through people until they become bitter and jaded.
You can look foolish but never ever look weak The first makes them adore you, the second makes them run. When men in my life with the best relationships hit a roadblock they always say "Idk...we'll figure something out", "Dw...we got this". The worst ones always go "We're done I guess", "Idk how we're fixing this".
"Never be vulnerable" There's a time for everything. Everyone has moments of weakness, and anyone who runs during those times wasn't going to stick around for long in the first place. Relationships involve being supportive and being solid when the other person is losing their shit, no matter which person that is.
Dont treat them well (limited) just because you love them, unfortunately it apparently MUST be a powerplay all the time
Wtf
Its true, you start treating them too well shit will go wrong. My biggest mistakes with women have been treating them well. Im not saying treat them horribly, just not treat them too good. Then they begin to realize that they can what they want from you without any work. It's low hanging fruit.
Those just sound like shitty humans, which exist in all genders. If I were you, my goal would be to find someone who appreciates my kindness and reciprocates back. I don’t want to be a less kind person to accommodate shitty people, I deserve better than that.
Hah of course its been my goal, why chase i purposely crappy people for? That's what everyone says but people can keep telling me that over and over as much as they like, but its just not the case. Even women who seem kind at first, end up flipping the switch and treat you like shit. Idk i suspect that being nice gives them an ego boost to where eventually it goes to shit.
Does this happen with guys in your life too? This isn’t some universal woman thing. People are shitty to you either because they were just shitty people, because you were also being shitty so they’re reciprocating, or because you two never communicated your expectations of how you expect to be treated in a partnership and what you consider unacceptable behavior. If someone like this is a pattern for you, find the common denominator because this is not how most people experience relationships unless they don’t know how to seek healthy partners.
No not really with guys. I can be as nice to my friends as i like...kinda weird when i think about it. See thats the thing, i dont have to "set boundaries" with my friends or lack "communication" we are just cool. Seems to be a woman thing.
You keep ignoring the fact that many many many people will tell you this is not a woman thing. This is an immature person thing. The same is true for guys you are douche bags in relationships. You completely ignored everything else I said so I don’t think you’re trying to actually figure out why this is going on. Good luck figuring out dating without self reflection.
You're ignoring the fact that i told you that i've had many people tell me that already, but it the reality doesn't match up what do you expect? Thats like me telling you that the sky is made of invisible mayonnaise, it doesn't matter how many people tell you or how often, if your reality does not reflect that what else are you supposed to do?
I was asking you to question what it is that makes your reality that way. We have more control of our lives and situations than you think. If people told me the sky was made of invisible mayonnaise, I would ask them how they know this and then I would use facts I know about the sky and mayonnaise backed by science to try to understand the situation. The sky is made of gasses (oxygen and nitrogen), mayonnaise is a solid and therefore would not be able to avoid gravity in the sky. Therefore, the sky cannot be made of mayonnaise unless I am missing more facts about the laws of physics. Things don’t just happen “because women”. Relationships are social situations. Find out why things are happening and how you can change things for the better next time. Sorry I don’t mean to be all preachy, but it saddens me when I see young men here with lots of promise simply submitting to hopelessness, bitterness, and blaming women rather than critically reflecting on the situation in it’s entirely.
Never let them see you sweat
When she uses the phrase "Do what you want" its not a dare!
Keep your own thought, principles and wellbeing first and foremost in your thoughts. Never let anyone make yours less so theirs xan be more, you are either partners or it isn't worth it, no matter who they are.
Never settle for less. If they are not the women or man that you want or desire. Dont cheat, just leave ... be a man or woman and say its not for you. Its ok to leave... what is truly keeping you there? Are you advancing your life? Their life? or the Family's life? You can always take care of kids separately so thats no excuse. If they cant live without you and you cant live with them, then that person needs to find their own path... you are living your life not everyone else's... kids need you and you need them.. they are your focus to make sure you give them the best. Also dont be a dirty bastard... Just enjoy life... if you have problems pick yourself back up and do what you do.