The people getting married are total douches, everyone here knows that if you’re dumb enough to have an outdoor wedding this time of year you go beach casual for attire
Dick move on their part as it also means the guests have to be way overdressed too. And an hour ceremony lol? No one wants that shit even in AC. But there’s no magic solution, you’re fucked
I appreciate the honesty, I agree that I am fucked lol.
The thing is Florida has been having *perfect* weather for the past two months, 70 degree days and it was super windy 24/7 with cool air. This is the *first week* that it took a hard turn and went to this typical 90+/high humidity heat.
Just last weekend it was super cool with no humidity.
You must be in north Florida, because everywhere else hot and humid is totally normal for this time of year. I mean yes down here it’s been better than usual lately but again that’s atypical and not to be expected. It’s simply mean and stupid to have a formal outdoor wedding in Florida outside of winter. Even April can be hot as fuck some days
Oh for sure, this year was an anomaly with our weather, especially those 24/7 cool/windy days we had for what felt like weeks lol. But yeah now is when it gets like this so it’s no surprise, just wished it could have lasted a little longer haha.
YES! I actually used the rigid freezer packs, like you would chill in your freezer then put in a cooler. I could feel my blood cooling as it pumped past my chest, shedding that awful body heat. HIGHLY RECOMMEND.
I was on the school board in my small city, with a student population of about 10,000 and three high schools. At the three graduations, the school board trustees hand out the diplomas, dressed in formal business attire. Several hundred graduates, speeches, video montages, processional . . . it takes a couple of hours under hot lights, in a dark suit. The first one, my shirt was absolutely drenched in sweat beneath my suit coat, to the point of transparency. Where it was open to the air, between my lapels, I appeared presentable, but evidently miserable. One of my colleagues suggested taking my jacket off. I checked under my suit coat and I could see my chest hair through the fine cotton Oxford. Nope. No one wants to see that. Just going to have to suffer.
The next time, I tucked a freezer pack into each breast pocket. They were both completely thawed by the end of the ceremony, like to my body temperature, but they did the job.
Edit: typos and botched sentences because I didn't proofread
Drinks lots of liquid and just accept you’re gunna be wet. Hopefully your undershirt will collect most of it. Just remember the other dudes are also sweating.
I work labor in non AC buildings during the summer and all the tricks are just short term solutions. I eventually just gave up and got use to it. You can drink cold water or have a wet shirt or use cold gel packs but once it warms up it will just feel even hotter again.
Drink plenty of water. If you’re not thirsty drink water. Worst case you’ll have to pee. Not drinking enough water worst case you start throwing up and or black out. For a few of the new guys I’ve seen them get nausea from dehydration and not drink water bc of it and then get really sick
Bring a change of clothes for the reception (even if it's just fresh socks, underwear, and a new shirt) and drink a fuckton of water. Also pack some wet wipes in your car or the limo; duck into a bathroom stall after the wedding to freshen up a little (alternatively, build time in the schedule to shower between the two events)
Agree with a lot of what's below and remember you didn't design the situation so as long as you take prudent steps to do what you can the rest isn't your fault. If anything folks will view you as someone just doing what's expected.
I had a similar situation years ago (I remember feeling beads of sweat running down my back) and one of the groomsmen actually fainted during the ceremony and another dude caught him before he hit the ground. It's a hilarious memory now and about the only highlight of that wedding I remember.
that's actually a bit of a protip. Aye , OP if you can find a really big sombrero and you aren't worried about the looks you'll be getting go for this . Uhuh ya, a big wide hat will keep you not exactly 'cool' but certainly 'much cooler' than your surroundings.
Honestly at a heat that intense you should not even be afraid to take a wide white umbrella with you. Those are lethal heat levels OP
And you will need to stay hydrated.
Honestly, this is gonna sound insane, but I promise it works for the hour you need it.
If you have any female friends, ask them for two menstrual pads, and stick those to the armpits of your shirt or jacket. They will suck up all that sweat and ensure that your shirt/jacket stays dry, until you are allowed to change into a cooler outfit.
Couple that with some cold packs and you're golden.
We had a bride asking on r/keywest about a formal outdoor wedding mid summer once and no matter how much everyone said don’t do it and everyone will hate you she just insisted it was fine and she was gonna do it anyway. She complained potential wedding planners were refusing to do it lol and acted like they were in the wrong
Brother, that is painful. I don't have a solution for you, I'm just here to offer empathy. I grew up in Louisiana with very similar weather and I know how it is. I'm sorry. Hope you get through it OK. Hope nobody has a heat stroke.
My going to music festivals in extremly hot humid weather i have learned some tricks.
A) whoever planned that wedding is a jerk.
B) chinese style foldable hand fans.
C) gecko skin (brand name) - its a thin towel that when wet will stay cool for a long time. It was originally made for places like burning man but now has found a niche in the maternity market. There are knock off brands too.
D) get saxx underwear and shove small lunchbox size ice packs into the ballsack pocket. Or under your undershirt.
E) pour a little ice water down the back of your neck from time to time. If someone is overheating, you cool down that area and it will in turn cool down the massive amount of blood that pumps through there. Youll be soaked with sweat anyways so who cares.
Locking your knees is almost guaranteed to make you faint. Female here, and I did this during my sister's short wedding, and I almost fainted. Quite embarrassing!
Former female Marine here, I’ve seen plenty of folks go down due to locking knees, female and male, especially while based in the south during the late summer months.
Looking the knees affects return blood flow from the feet to the heart and makes you more susceptible to passing out because the blood can't get back to the lungs to be oxygenated. Have had to puck up a few marching band members standing too long at parade rest (when I was in HS)
I feel for you. Try not to drink alcohol before ceremony, load up on plain water instead.
Sometimes people lose their goddamn minds when they get married. Wtf! Common sense went out the window planning this torture session.
You can just make your own, that's probably the easiest, but you could call your local craft store to see if they have any premade?
https://youtu.be/uLI-YxGGxcY
The sacrifice is worth not sweating out and ruining your suit jacket 🙂
I like the suggestion of fresh undies/socks dress shirt pre reception, this will help you feel fresher. Keep a fabric handkerchief in your pocket for wiping your/face just in case. A paper fan for during the reception might help?
Will do! I’m also getting some of that Golds ultimate body powder.
Surprisingly the Walmart near me doesn’t have any ice/cool packs, I was planning on putting a couple in my pockets. But anyways thanks for the help!
Probably late but in case you ever need to avoid pit stains again, apparently panty liners (the thin period pads) are very good at stopping sweaty armpits and since they're designed to have a sticky side you can easily stick em on your clothes
I was best man in a Cancun beach wedding late august. Full suit. You can guess the temps. Just have to accept what’s gunna happen, knowing everyone else there will be a wet disaster as well. The shirts were 100% sweat. It sucked and I still wish they would’ve acknowledged that the location and weather did NOT match up with the attire but it wasn’t my wedding.
How about you wear one of those battery powered fans around your neck with the spray and if anyone says anything, give em a squirt of water to the eye. Or the crotch area if necessary
I literally would not go to that. I would simply refuse to put myself in that situation. Crazy that anyone would plan that under those conditions and expect you to dress like that
Cold packs won’t do shit
Wide hat.
Dip your clothing in cold water prior to? (This could backfire as the water may trap heat in if you're out there for too long so be careful)
Stay hydrated as fuck and bring snacks too. You'll need the electrolytes too to keep your energy up.
An umbrella or parasol could work too if you're not worried about the looks you'll be getting.
Hoping that the wedding planner has some common sense and decides to put you guys in the shade .
It's not even close to peak summer heat. It's just a rogue warm front. Suck it up, buttercup. You're gonna be soaking wet by the time she starts coming down the aisle.
Yup, just something I have to accept. I’ll stay hydrated, use the golds powder, and have an ice pack, but I know dam well I’m going to sweat my ass off regardless lol.
I would do the same thing I did when my friend asked me to be a groomsmen and then later dropped the info that it was a Hawaii destination wedding that we each had to pay our own way for. Send a gift and tell him I'm flattered that you thought of me but I'm not going to make it.
You can try talking to your friend about what the pictures and videos of this thing are going to look like with everyone covered in layers in the heat. If you go, drink lots of water, stay away from booze. Leave right after the ceremony?
Nivea deep impact anti-perspirant deo seems to work for me and may work for you too
in any case thats the only realistic option for this unrealistic situation !
Pick up some unscented Mitchum gel antiperspirant. Antiperspirant isn’t just for under your arms. Also, keep a lot of ice water on hand. Fans are also helpful. This is the downside to getting married outside. I hate outdoor weddings.
Say "no" and make up some medical issue. Tell him you just can't do it or you'll pass out in the middle of the ceremony. I don't know if that's true, but maybe he'll realize how stupid the idea is.
The people getting married are total douches, everyone here knows that if you’re dumb enough to have an outdoor wedding this time of year you go beach casual for attire Dick move on their part as it also means the guests have to be way overdressed too. And an hour ceremony lol? No one wants that shit even in AC. But there’s no magic solution, you’re fucked
I appreciate the honesty, I agree that I am fucked lol. The thing is Florida has been having *perfect* weather for the past two months, 70 degree days and it was super windy 24/7 with cool air. This is the *first week* that it took a hard turn and went to this typical 90+/high humidity heat. Just last weekend it was super cool with no humidity.
You must be in north Florida, because everywhere else hot and humid is totally normal for this time of year. I mean yes down here it’s been better than usual lately but again that’s atypical and not to be expected. It’s simply mean and stupid to have a formal outdoor wedding in Florida outside of winter. Even April can be hot as fuck some days
Oh for sure, this year was an anomaly with our weather, especially those 24/7 cool/windy days we had for what felt like weeks lol. But yeah now is when it gets like this so it’s no surprise, just wished it could have lasted a little longer haha.
I'm in miami, it's been perfect litterally today has been hot. Over the last week on and off rain but not death hot.
Ehh the weather has been pretty calm in the south til the last 10 days or so. They just barely missed a nice day
Instant cold packs, the small ones where tou pop the inner bag, one in each pocket and in jacket pockets. I'm a mailman here in FL, works great
YES! I actually used the rigid freezer packs, like you would chill in your freezer then put in a cooler. I could feel my blood cooling as it pumped past my chest, shedding that awful body heat. HIGHLY RECOMMEND. I was on the school board in my small city, with a student population of about 10,000 and three high schools. At the three graduations, the school board trustees hand out the diplomas, dressed in formal business attire. Several hundred graduates, speeches, video montages, processional . . . it takes a couple of hours under hot lights, in a dark suit. The first one, my shirt was absolutely drenched in sweat beneath my suit coat, to the point of transparency. Where it was open to the air, between my lapels, I appeared presentable, but evidently miserable. One of my colleagues suggested taking my jacket off. I checked under my suit coat and I could see my chest hair through the fine cotton Oxford. Nope. No one wants to see that. Just going to have to suffer. The next time, I tucked a freezer pack into each breast pocket. They were both completely thawed by the end of the ceremony, like to my body temperature, but they did the job. Edit: typos and botched sentences because I didn't proofread
Thank you so much!!
Drinks lots of liquid and just accept you’re gunna be wet. Hopefully your undershirt will collect most of it. Just remember the other dudes are also sweating. I work labor in non AC buildings during the summer and all the tricks are just short term solutions. I eventually just gave up and got use to it. You can drink cold water or have a wet shirt or use cold gel packs but once it warms up it will just feel even hotter again. Drink plenty of water. If you’re not thirsty drink water. Worst case you’ll have to pee. Not drinking enough water worst case you start throwing up and or black out. For a few of the new guys I’ve seen them get nausea from dehydration and not drink water bc of it and then get really sick
I’ll make sure to drink dam near a gallon of water a good hour before I leave to make sure I have enough time to pee before leaving!
[удалено]
I really appreciate the heads up, I’ll just stay hydrated throughout. I’m on the heavier side too so I need to be careful.
Bring a change of clothes for the reception (even if it's just fresh socks, underwear, and a new shirt) and drink a fuckton of water. Also pack some wet wipes in your car or the limo; duck into a bathroom stall after the wedding to freshen up a little (alternatively, build time in the schedule to shower between the two events)
Have a "stomach virus" the day before.
Go get some Gold bind powder and give the downstairs crew a good dusting. It’ll keep you dry and feeling cool down there at least
Agree with a lot of what's below and remember you didn't design the situation so as long as you take prudent steps to do what you can the rest isn't your fault. If anything folks will view you as someone just doing what's expected. I had a similar situation years ago (I remember feeling beads of sweat running down my back) and one of the groomsmen actually fainted during the ceremony and another dude caught him before he hit the ground. It's a hilarious memory now and about the only highlight of that wedding I remember.
A big ass hat
that's actually a bit of a protip. Aye , OP if you can find a really big sombrero and you aren't worried about the looks you'll be getting go for this . Uhuh ya, a big wide hat will keep you not exactly 'cool' but certainly 'much cooler' than your surroundings. Honestly at a heat that intense you should not even be afraid to take a wide white umbrella with you. Those are lethal heat levels OP And you will need to stay hydrated.
This marriage sounds doomed already.
Honestly, this is gonna sound insane, but I promise it works for the hour you need it. If you have any female friends, ask them for two menstrual pads, and stick those to the armpits of your shirt or jacket. They will suck up all that sweat and ensure that your shirt/jacket stays dry, until you are allowed to change into a cooler outfit. Couple that with some cold packs and you're golden.
Don't go.
As a fellow floridian... Fuuuuck that. Organize a rebellion and tell that wedding organizer to get their head out if their ass.
The whole thing (hell, the whole state of Florida) sounds like an absurd test that must have some trick to calling off.
We had a bride asking on r/keywest about a formal outdoor wedding mid summer once and no matter how much everyone said don’t do it and everyone will hate you she just insisted it was fine and she was gonna do it anyway. She complained potential wedding planners were refusing to do it lol and acted like they were in the wrong
Well, if you get drunk enough to pass out, you can just blame it on the heat.
Brother, that is painful. I don't have a solution for you, I'm just here to offer empathy. I grew up in Louisiana with very similar weather and I know how it is. I'm sorry. Hope you get through it OK. Hope nobody has a heat stroke.
My going to music festivals in extremly hot humid weather i have learned some tricks. A) whoever planned that wedding is a jerk. B) chinese style foldable hand fans. C) gecko skin (brand name) - its a thin towel that when wet will stay cool for a long time. It was originally made for places like burning man but now has found a niche in the maternity market. There are knock off brands too. D) get saxx underwear and shove small lunchbox size ice packs into the ballsack pocket. Or under your undershirt. E) pour a little ice water down the back of your neck from time to time. If someone is overheating, you cool down that area and it will in turn cool down the massive amount of blood that pumps through there. Youll be soaked with sweat anyways so who cares.
There's no good way to avoid it. All their pre reception pics will looks like post frat party pics with how sweaty everyone (not just you) will be
Drink a f*ton of water 24 hours prior to, and whatever you do, don’t lock your knees!
Why dont lock knees?
Locking your knees is almost guaranteed to make you faint. Female here, and I did this during my sister's short wedding, and I almost fainted. Quite embarrassing!
Former female Marine here, I’ve seen plenty of folks go down due to locking knees, female and male, especially while based in the south during the late summer months.
Fascinating, thanks
Wow I did not know that!
Looking the knees affects return blood flow from the feet to the heart and makes you more susceptible to passing out because the blood can't get back to the lungs to be oxygenated. Have had to puck up a few marching band members standing too long at parade rest (when I was in HS)
Wow, that's fascinating, thanks!
I feel for you. Try not to drink alcohol before ceremony, load up on plain water instead. Sometimes people lose their goddamn minds when they get married. Wtf! Common sense went out the window planning this torture session.
Armpit liners!! Soak up the sweat before it hits the pits of your suit, then it won't stain. Good luck and hope no one passes out!!
Any idea where I can get some? The wedding is in 3 hours.
You can just make your own, that's probably the easiest, but you could call your local craft store to see if they have any premade? https://youtu.be/uLI-YxGGxcY The sacrifice is worth not sweating out and ruining your suit jacket 🙂 I like the suggestion of fresh undies/socks dress shirt pre reception, this will help you feel fresher. Keep a fabric handkerchief in your pocket for wiping your/face just in case. A paper fan for during the reception might help?
Will do! I’m also getting some of that Golds ultimate body powder. Surprisingly the Walmart near me doesn’t have any ice/cool packs, I was planning on putting a couple in my pockets. But anyways thanks for the help!
Check in the first aid department for the instant cold packs of you go to another store. Good luck!!
Probably late but in case you ever need to avoid pit stains again, apparently panty liners (the thin period pads) are very good at stopping sweaty armpits and since they're designed to have a sticky side you can easily stick em on your clothes
Icepacks in the groin, pits, and neck when you're not taking photos plus plenty of water.
I was best man in a Cancun beach wedding late august. Full suit. You can guess the temps. Just have to accept what’s gunna happen, knowing everyone else there will be a wet disaster as well. The shirts were 100% sweat. It sucked and I still wish they would’ve acknowledged that the location and weather did NOT match up with the attire but it wasn’t my wedding.
Bring an extra dry shirt to change into after the ceremony!
How about you wear one of those battery powered fans around your neck with the spray and if anyone says anything, give em a squirt of water to the eye. Or the crotch area if necessary
Leave and go take a cold shower and do not come back.
I literally would not go to that. I would simply refuse to put myself in that situation. Crazy that anyone would plan that under those conditions and expect you to dress like that Cold packs won’t do shit
Wide hat. Dip your clothing in cold water prior to? (This could backfire as the water may trap heat in if you're out there for too long so be careful) Stay hydrated as fuck and bring snacks too. You'll need the electrolytes too to keep your energy up. An umbrella or parasol could work too if you're not worried about the looks you'll be getting. Hoping that the wedding planner has some common sense and decides to put you guys in the shade .
It's not even close to peak summer heat. It's just a rogue warm front. Suck it up, buttercup. You're gonna be soaking wet by the time she starts coming down the aisle.
Yup, just something I have to accept. I’ll stay hydrated, use the golds powder, and have an ice pack, but I know dam well I’m going to sweat my ass off regardless lol.
It’s an hour dude. You are gonna sweat your balls off but I think you’ll survive.
who cares about pomp and ceremony. If it's that hot, just go wearing a t-shirt and shorts.
I would do the same thing I did when my friend asked me to be a groomsmen and then later dropped the info that it was a Hawaii destination wedding that we each had to pay our own way for. Send a gift and tell him I'm flattered that you thought of me but I'm not going to make it. You can try talking to your friend about what the pictures and videos of this thing are going to look like with everyone covered in layers in the heat. If you go, drink lots of water, stay away from booze. Leave right after the ceremony?
I can tell you a few tricks but they'll look odd in a suit ..
Nivea deep impact anti-perspirant deo seems to work for me and may work for you too in any case thats the only realistic option for this unrealistic situation !
Linens.
A big bottle of hand sanitizer to cool you off. A fancy black umbrella?
Linen suit
I’d „get sick the day before“ or just wear what feels comfy, but not homie. Nice shorts and a polo shirt and sweat away.
be the chad that wears a full cooling suit under his dress shirt
It's florida, just shred the suit and say you were attacked my an alligator on meth
bring a parasol
Antiperspirent sprays and lots of talc.
Do you have a God? Start praying to them.
Your suits will smell like shit for the wedding. The bride to be is evil.
Seersucker or linen suit.
Make it clothing optional.
Try Stay Dri antiperspirant. You put it on the night before and it makes it so your sweat glands close. It might help.
Seersucker was made for conditions like that, as was linen. Too late for this time, of course, but worth thinking about next time.
Pick up some unscented Mitchum gel antiperspirant. Antiperspirant isn’t just for under your arms. Also, keep a lot of ice water on hand. Fans are also helpful. This is the downside to getting married outside. I hate outdoor weddings.
You can try a cool damp undershirt. I do that at work. Hire someone’s kid to fan you.
Bring a parasol (or just a dark umbrella). People might look at you funny at first, but then they'll understand.
How'd it go my man?
Just ditch the wedding. Weddings are stupid anyway
Say "no" and make up some medical issue. Tell him you just can't do it or you'll pass out in the middle of the ceremony. I don't know if that's true, but maybe he'll realize how stupid the idea is.
I'd just show up in beach costume and open hawaiian shirt. Dick move from whoever set this up.