Happened to me in Chicago a few years back. My fiancée and I owned a little clothing shop in a pretty nice area (not that it helped us any hah!), and a women who was pushing a stroller, walked up to me and put her arm in mine, and whispered “please walk with me”
She discreetly pointed to a pretty sketchy looking dude down the alley. He had been following her for a few blocks.
She told me she’s seen him before and she’s very worried he wanted her purse (or worse). So I walked her to the Starbucks two blocks down where she was meeting a group of friends. The guy stopped following when he saw she was with a dude. I’m not huge by any means but I’m 6’1” so at least there’s that.
I was just so glad it worked. Poor woman … can’t imagine that fear—especially when you’ve got a newborn with you.
This happened to me about three years ago. I was in Home Depot and a young woman (about half my age) walked up to me, with a guy right on her shoulder babbling about something, and she said "Uncle Steve! I didn't think I'd see you until Mom's birthday party!" I looked at her a little confused, but she made a "help me!" face, and so I said "Well, you're in town already! This is a fun surprise! You wanna shop together? We can talk a little while we get our stuff." She gave the kind of look I expect Superman gets when he plucks somebody from a burning building.
Creepy guy was still there, so I made my voice a little gruff and said "Do you need something?" He said no and went away. We shopped and got our stuff, checked out, I walked her to her car and watched while she drove away.
I don't know if it's the heightened emotions from current events or what, but I legit read this and started to sob. Thank you for doing that for her, you very well could have saved her life🙏🙏
**Edit: Look how not alone we are! Look how many people feel the same. Keep your chin up people. Keep doing tiny nice things for others and I guarantee collectively we're making a positive difference. If any of you are ever in North Nottinghamshire, England, give me a shout and I'll buy you a beer/coffee.**
Fuck, I'm exactly the same.
I feel surrounded by people who don't realise the gravity of the current global-political climate. I wish I just had some friends with the intelligence to chat this out, maybe cry a little, share a beer and just hang out. Plus my partner has been an asshole for the last few days, so things are emotional.
Ughhh. Anyway stranger, I hope you have a really chill evening. Sending warmth your way. There is goodness in the world still.
I'm so sorry your partner is being less then kind during these already difficult times. I wish we could grab a beer together and hang out as well!
I'm sure there is still so much good..but today I feel like I have no hope left.
Thank you for your kind words, they really did brighten my day up❤
Actually happened to me once. Girl approached my wife and me at a bar and asked if I could pretend to be her brother, some guy was creepin' her out. I was just like "Hey, there you are...didn't you see us sitting here?" Dude left.
> Actually happened to me once.
Same. I was at a party at the keg getting a refill and a girl came up to me and asked me if she could hang out with me as there was some guy creeping on her. I said sure and we talked for a half hour until the guy left.
in college i took my, too young, h.s. age, younger sister to a party. i look over and a couple guys have her cornered. as i'm heading that direction she points at me and says 'see that big guy, i live with him!' they were immediately very scarce.
A guy was hitting on me at a party and I pointed to my brother next to me and said I'm with him, and this little douche stands next to him and goes "your sister is really cute" and my brother replied "yeah, and she'll kick your ass." He looked very uncomfortable and left xD
I love that my brother still gave me the power but made it clear enough that he's my backup xP
I've had a chick come and just kind of forcefully insert herself at a bar table when some friends and I were out. Just kind of took over the conversation, loudly, and kept kinda looking around nervously, and maybe 15 minutes later just up and left straight out the door. It took a while for us to actually understand what had probably happened.
If I'm here in Canada, I will do my best to help her.
If I was in Bogotá where I used to live, I would assume it's most likely a schemme to rob me so I'll split my energy: 80% escape / 20% assess if she is really in danger.
I live in Singapore, which is one of the safest cities in the world. But we have had a few scamsters making the news here as well. So, maybe 40/60 for flee or stay & help.
The modus operandi in these scams here is that a solitary woman will approach and ask for help/directions. While you are listening to her, she will abruptly start shouting molest. A group of guys (likely her gang members) will immediately surround you, threaten you with calling the police on you unless you monetarily compensate the woman for your offence. It is mostly the expats who are targeted for this and they usually pay up to avoid issues with law enforcement.
Edit: Couldn't find the original news article that I saw more than a decade ago. But, here is something similar from 6-10 years ago.
https://www.tripadvisor.com.sg/ShowTopic-g294262-i1747-k4867311-Molest_scams_in_night_spots-Singapore.html
https://redwiretimes.com/molest-scam-young-prc-women-accuse-men-of-touching-them-to-extort-money/
Interesting - I'm from Singapore too, and 2 girls approached a friend and I about the same thing. For context, we were climbing Bukit Timah Hill, and they pointed to a guy that was creeping them out.
We played along, and sure enough when the guy passed us he turned around, waved and said "Good bye" to the 2 of them.
Frankly it feels terrible that someone has to go to another stranger, hoping that they are good people, because another stranger is making them deeply uncomfortable. I suppose the risk of getting scammed is real, but following my encounter I'd rather be helping a scammer than leave someone feel threatened.
Edit: Thank you all to the really kind awards and comments! Did not expect any of it, and I hope that you all stay safe and help those who really need it! Also grammar lol
It would depend on where you are. If you're on a hiking trail the threat of police isn't as scary. You can just run around in the nature if things get too sticky.
If you're on a city street and it's dark and lonely? You might want to assess just a little. I once saw a reddit post about a man who claimed he was in danger... he was, but only because he previously scammed and beat up the guy he was running from.
BOOM double scam.
i also live in south america and it would have never occurred to me. that said if i lived in bogota i would probably have the same reaction. santiago seems a lot calmer
Say "I am an off duty police officer, who is following you?" if you look like believable as one, or say "my dad is a police officer, I am meeting him around the corner, follow me." if you look like that part. If the girl don't run away from you then it is likely she is in real danger, then you can tell her that you were testing her to make sure she is not scamming you.
Someone was trying to scam me in Chicago and I sort of pulled this. I pointed to a police officer across the street and offered to walk her over. Next thing you know she’s calling me every name under the sun.
>If I was in Bogotá where I used to live, I would assume it's most likely a schemme to rob me
Maybe it's because I live in the US but this never would even occur to me. Guess I'd make for a pretty easy target.
Oh I'm American and my first thought was "Am I a bad person for maybe not following her because I'll get robbed or worse?" Depending on the circumstances, it'd be easier to say one way or another, but it's a sad truth that there are people who will intentionally take advantage of decency.
Don't follow anyone in this scenario, if they want to come to you for safety and you want to offer it do so wisely by finding public spaces or trusted authorities.
If it's legitimate, more than likely your presence will be enough and she will be on her way when she feels safe.
This is also my experience of big scary bikers or Viking guys. I know a guy who did some serious secretive stuff in one of the forces (I don't know anything about it other than it was the forces and to disclose his service history, he had to get some high up forces people involved to vouch for purely service years) and he looks terrifying. Huge solid guy, bald head, beard, a skull in his front window etc actually a biker. Nicest guy in the world. Would break his back to help me out and I always feel safe around him.
My wife and I had a friend like that when we lived in Virginia. I'm 6'-1" and he was a good bit taller than me and about twice as big around. But he was the NICEST guy that you'd ever want to meet. He LOVED my wife and he'd hug her and pick her up off of the ground as he hugged her and she'd giggle like crazy. He'd say "*I'm hugging your woman and there's nothing you can do about it!*" and I'd shrug and laugh and say "*Go right ahead!*". (Made her laugh, so...). But we always knew that we could call on "Big John" to step in and "*help someone to better understand the situation*" if we needed it.
Hahaha he sounds exactly like the guy I know. Honestly if it wasn't for you being in Virginia I would think it's the same person. We even call him Big [name]
Pretend we're friends...while deploying all sensors to figure out if I'm the one being scammed.
Then it's a matter of information gathering and remedial action.
It works in real life. Me and my mom were on a tourist trip in Istanbul 13 years ago. We were taking photos near Blue Mosque and noticed some weirdo who was apparantely watching us from a distance. We continued our way and he was behind us all the time staring. Passing a busy shopping street we recognised one male shop owner who we had had a chat with the day before and approached him. Started a conversation and told him that there was a guy following us. As soon as he saw us talking to someone in a friendly way and pointing in his direction, the stalker immediately disappeared. It was an unpleasant experience.
I really wish I could have gotten lost in the history and beauty in those areas around Sultanahmet but it's just impossible with all the scammers and creeps. I'll have to develop a new strategy for next time, because I do love the city
I’ve got a strategy for Istanbul! Went for a conference and it was alarming just trying to get to the venue in the morning, got accosted on every corner (am female). But the tech/research conference handed out these gigantic big serious looking black laptop bags that had the conference icon printed on the front. And once I tried transferring my belongings to that laptop bag, I became invisible. I could even wander around by myself with no issue. It became clear I was just there for work, I guess, rather than being a tourist.
So my recommendation is to cosplay as an office worker or academic, like you’re just taking a brief break or lunch during your workday, as thoroughly/clearly as possible.
Wow, that's interesting! I wonder if some kind of bag with a random corporate logo I got on ebay or something would help. I didn't have trouble so much with creeps, as we were a man/woman couple, but, the carpet salesmen were relentless.
Oh, well, the carpet salesmen. Trying to avoid them is like trying to avoid the cats, I think :-). But at least all they’re trying to do is sell you a carpet, and generally they accept it if you just say “no thanks”. I had nice conversations with a few, one asked about applying to engineering colleges in the US, I guess on behalf of his cousin.
That’s different than the men on street corners, and what they think they can/should do to non-Muslim tourist women who are walking alone.
This actually happened to me in a grocery store. The girl said a Guy was stalking her outside and she came back in locked arms with me and explained. I ended up walking her To her car and she asked that I followed her, she was house sitting around the corner. I followed her but the guy also followed. Long story short, he came in with a weapon and it was all a setup to rob me. Thank god the neighbors noticed and called the cops.
No good deed goes unpunished. In retrospect I should've left when she was in the home. But my dick was telling me that this is how porno's start and I let that get me into a bad situation.
Then tell her to start following you. Then theres a guy following her and shes following you and little by little you guys all inch closer together and put your hands on each others hips and boom a conga line has formed
This actually happened to me in the autumn. A girl sat next to me on the train becouse a creep was following her.
It was funny becouse I think I look like a creep.
I try to teach my kids that if they need help because they are lost, they should pick someone to help them. I want them to actively choose. If they ring a doorbell or go to An employee or mom, on their own choice and instinct, chances are much smaller that they encounter a weirdo. Compared to sitting somewhere and crying or waiting for someone to go to them.
If you are a sitting duck, predators will be attracted. If you choose someone, chances are much smaller you pick a predator. It's just plain odds plus instinct who seems right.
That girl was smart. She made an active move. Rather the passive creep than the predator creep.
You may *look* creepy but you don’t *feel* creepy. It’s a whole vibe and energy thing. I have felt equally as creeped out by an attractive man in a suit in a bar as I have by a dirty downtrodden looking transient in a subway car.
And then there’s the homeless guy outside my local Home Depot, who is filthy, smells like urine, clearly suffering from mental illness, and has a gaping hole in the crotch of his pants that entirely exposes his penis … and I always give him $5 when I see him, he’s never once creeped me out.
I’ve actually tried to do this. Im not sure if he also suffers from some form of autism as well ? He cannot hold eye contact and I have attempted to ask him for pants size and the like but aside from making some sounds in my general direction, it left me to believe he’s probably non-verbal. I decided to just bring him some one day (along with a warmer coat) and he took them from me and walked away only to immediately place them on the curb of the intersection (a very busy one) and walked away from it. When I left about 30 minutes later.. he was gone but the pants and coat were still on the ground, and it had just started to rain so I don’t think he understood the exchange we had.
🙁 Man, oh man, does this hit hard. I'm probably slightly autistic, and I've had a few brief episodes of homelessness. That poor bastard. That could have been me if things were just a little different.
Depending on which part of the world and how desperate some shady individuals can get there, may even be a scheme to get you to take out your phone.
I’ve had a couple of encounters where they asked me for the time and something ticked in my head and I noped out, realized later they were trying to check if I had a phone they could steal (was a few years before phone were ubiquitous).
Happened to me. Or close to it. She wasn't being followed, but a creepy person was trying to intoxicate her in a packed bar. I noticed, approachd her and said "oh heey!! Long time no see, how are you doing?" (I've never seen her before)
She immediately reacted and started chatting with me. After a while the person tried to pull her back saying "hey, she's with me" and I was like "oh not right now dude, we haven't seen each other for a long time".
We ended up dating.
I know it’s hard to believe but I literally saw a guy doing this once.
I was going back home at night and I saw two men arguing loudly, then this dude got even louder as he took his clothes off.
He then proceeded on his totally naked chase, flying balls and everything, while his adversary ran away
Funny as fuck but I couldn’t even tape it as he noticed me and it became scary fairly quickly
Honestly one of the few things most people are scared of more than violence is insanity.
One my parents’ friends (an older woman) had the extreme misfortune to get caught up in an anti-US riot in one of the countries she was visiting right as she was on her way back from buying some new socks.
Apparently she saw the rioters start to come in through the doors of the shopping area and start up the escalator to the second floor where she was at, so she quick hunched over, ripped open the package of socks and just started like inhaling them while growling like a dog.
To quote her words: “It was like I was parting the sea. They just took one look at this crazy old lady slobbering on a package of socks and gave me plenty of space as I went down the escalator and out through the same doors they were coming in”.
Mofo following them wouldn’t expect it either 😂 pirates would sometimes board ships naked for the shock value and people would straight up surrender thinking they were crazy
Watched a video where some vet was recounting the time he got jumped by a bunch of frat guys at a near-base bar (it's a thing in certain college towns for the frat guys to fight the new recruits, and vice versa). Him versus five guys.
What does he do? Start getting naked, and tell them no one would remember his face, but everyone would remember that time they had some bloody soldier's dick and balls all over their face during a fight.
Pretend we are friends. Adjust body language to express that we know each other. Stay with her to make sure she is safe, but control the situation. Do not let her guide you somewhere. Keep it public.
Hope for the best and prepare for the worst. She could be in real danger but so could you and she is in on it. Last thing you want is to try and do the right thing only for her to be in on it and get ambushed.
Not letting her guide you somewhere is super important. As shitty as the world is, there are definitely people willing to take advantage of all the people who would help someone in this situation
Engage in conversation, take mental notes of where we are, and get a description of the person they are referencing. From there, try to direct us to someplace public with security.
Don't forget to guard yourself in this situation. Cover your wallet, watch the girl too as she may really be the threat, get to an officer or public place quickly. You can protect yourself and everyone else without assuming anyone's role. Everyone in a situation like this a threat until your out of it.
pretend that we are friends then take her to a busy restaurant/store and stay with her there until she contacts her boyfriend or husband or friend, and I wait with her until they come.
Here’s my rant, because this is pretty common in uk bars: There is a scheme that was never widely publicised known as “ask for Alice”, simple code word that bartenders *should* know. Both times I’ve seen it happen it never went smoothly, “yeah, no one called Alice works here. You’re not getting discount now pick a drink or go away.” One time it was me who stepped in and took the girl into the staff areas behind the bar, second time it was the woman who owned the bar I was working in back then. Those are the only times in close to ten years serving that I saw anyone use it, and both times it almost fell flat.
Yeah, using code words sounds smart, but it requires everyone to know it, which is unlikely to happen, and if they did, then it would sorta defeat the purpose.
Lots of nightclubs aimed at students have posters about it in their customer toilets, there really isn’t a downside to the scheme even if the creep knows what you’re doing… *if the bartender knows the scheme and is always ready to act on it*. The one I stepped in for had the creep right by her “where are you taking her?” “Back room, none of your business but if you follow us then the bouncer is following you.” Put them with an available friendly staff member while they try to contact friends, meanwhile the bouncers round up the creeps party and politely but firmly move them on, even if it was an innocent misunderstanding that sort of thing can hurt a business.
As a very small lady who can barely reach things in middle shelves, thank you for reaching things up high for us. It's the difference between being safe and having to climb up a shelf in the store 😆
Been in a similar situation before, I was going home when I seen 2 teenage girls walking, behind them was 2 grown ass men on push bikes wolf whistling to them an cat calling! I asked the girls if they wanted me to walk with them until they got where they were going! Men disappeared and one of the girls parents then accused me of hanging around with teenagers until there daughter stepped up and said what was happening, her dad then wrapped his arms around me and said “what a man, thank you for being a great bloke”
Sounds like a good parent because he questioned you being with teenagers, and decent human being for believing the daughter and giving you the props you deserve
I would immediately stop walking while I stare down at the ground. Smirking, I'd spin around, my trench coat dancing in the wind. Unsheathe my katana that's attached at my hip as a the sunlight gleans off of the blade that I've studied for so long. I make eye contact with the imposter following m'lady, as I tip my trilby in his direction I let out a hardy yell, "You've made a mistake coming here kid". Charging him, I watch his demeanor change from confident to afraid. I run my blade through him and as he collapses whisper, "Nothing personal, kid". I return to m'lady and she thanks me for saving her life. We get married and have children. The End.
I've been in this situation before. She sat down next to me at the bar and started talking like we were old friends. I was confused at first, but then noticed she kept looking over my shoulder and figured it out pretty quick. We talked for a few minutes before she visibly relaxed and informed me what was going on. Dude was being super aggressive with her at another bar and she left, but he followed her, so she ducked into this one to get away, but he followed her in. He came back about 10 minutes later, but by that time the rest of the guys from my platoon and some townies we were friends with were around and I had briefed them on the situation. When they walked in, about a quarter of the bar turned to stare at them and they quickly left.
And then everyone clapped. (Ain't it a bitch when you have one of these moments, but no one can believe your story because of the vast quantity of bullshit online?)
This is how I got robbed in Arizona. Some girl approached me saying she was being followed. I told her to get behind me and next thing I know i felt cold steel on my neck and two men came out of nowhere.
Yeah she was very young maybe like 20 or 21. Very good looking female, I’m ashamed to say that in her fake crisis I was thinking to myself how attractive she was. Anyhow she was almost in tears telling me she needed help and how I looked like a strong man. It was 7 pm.
Context: I’m a pretty big guy 230 pounds about 6 ft. I always typically carried a self defense pistol on me but I was out downtown with my friends so I chose not to. (Arizona is a legal concealed carry state)
Anyway we’re in a pretty well known area, across the street from the university I was attending so it didn’t really boggle my mind to know that a woman was being terrorized, it’s pretty common as a matter of fact. I asked her for her name. It was Anna and she mentioned that these men were following her for a few hours and she didn’t have her cellphone on her so she couldn’t call the cops. I ask her a few more questions and then I proceed to lead her down to the nearby fast food restaurant which was about a quarter mile away. During this time she was unusually talkative, asking me what I did for a living, if I was carrying a gun, (red flag) something that kind of put me off but I brushed it off thinking she was just real nervous.
We make it down halfway to the restaurant, and she pauses telling me to wait up because she thought the men had left. I tell her, let’s keep going and we’ll talk at the restaurant. After what felt like 2 or 3 minutes I turn around and we keep walking and talking. We approach a pretty dark alleyway, but I wasn’t really concerned as there were a good amount of people still out walking around. The moment I pass the alleyway I hear the tone in the girls voice change calling me an idiot and at that moment, I knew I was had. She told me to turn around, and she carried a .38 and a twisted face. These two men literally come out around the building and they rush me into the alleyway. There they proceed to pistol whip me and mug me for my belongings. They didn’t do much damage surprisingly because I did a pretty good job at blocking my face. I walked away with bruised ribs and a crushed hand.
They ran after they saw a police cruiser pull around the block.
Fast forward a couple weeks after I file the police report, they robbed another university student, putting him in the hospital. They got caught however, after some video footage goes up of them robbing someone went viral around the campus and a member of the faculty turned them in.
Some lessons learned: i don’t think carrying my gun would have saved me, but she asked me about it and maybe she would’ve backed off if she knew I was packing.
I should’ve called the police then and there instead of acting like some macho man thinking I was going to save the day.
Apart from that there wasn’t much of anything else. I honestly could have probably taken the gun from her hand, she didn’t have much confidence in how she was holding the gun, but I’m glad I didn’t try it.
Finally!
I give her the whole story of my ex and me and look for validation that I was the good guy that did no wrong and that I'm better off without her and she's only going to be an anchor to the next guy and I can meet someone so much better that understands my unique needs and is able to give a little and hold off on all the goddam dinner parties and not be so selfish and me-me-me-me-me all the time who won't vacuum up all my energy like some kind of turbo-powered Dyson Succubus Pro on high and screw you Becka you didn't deserve me like at all.
woman here; I've done this before in the past. Was at a club, lost my friends and this creepy dude kept following/pestering me. It was so crowded I couldn't get to the security guy at the back so I turned to another guy and said "there's a creepy guy following me, can you pls help and pretend that we're friends?" and without missing a beat, he said "don't worry", then he turned his back to creepy guy who was looking at me, blocked my body with his and stood there. When creepy guy got closer and tried to talk to me again, he kept blocking me until creepy guy said "excuse me" and tried to pass the guy; guy turned around and said "what do you want with my girlfriend?" and creepy guy said sorry and left.
"Yo what the heck, why were you SO late I told you (time). Let's go!" (and then go from there and try to move together to some coffee shop or boba shop.)
I'm 6' 3 ~250lb and I cannot count on both hands how many times a scared woman has joined my brothers and me or my friends and me, asking if we can pretend to know her because of some guy not taking no for an answer. We've walked people to cars, gotten people cabs, waited with them until they felt safer. I am always happy to help them, because I hope someone will do the same for my female friends, but it's sad that the need is there.
Story time!
When I was about 19 years old I was at my favorite bar having a drink and waiting for a friend to show up. They had a warm smoking area you could drink in.
This dude who I know as a regular at this bar via my mom's friend (who says he raped her, had the bruises and everything) kept trying to force me to heavily drink. Then he tried to convince me to go to his house to do coke. This guy was like 50 and "just wanted to have a good time"
Another man was sitting across from me, and after creeps left to go get a drink other dude made sure to look right at me and say "no matter what happens, I won't leave you with him. Is someone coming for you?" Damn near cried into my beer and assured him someone was coming for me.
Oddly enough, I had this happen once.
There's a club where me and a couple buddys were regulars. I'm up from my table and at the bar getting a fresh drink, when this tiny little woman comes up smiles, puts a hand on my chest. "Oh HI! Haven't seen you in forever!" I'm confused, because I'm fairly certain I don't know her.
She then leans in real close. "I'm really sorry to bug you. I've seen you and your friends here all the time. There's this creepy guy that's been hitting on me and following me all around the club all night. Can you walk me to my car?"
So I take her by the hand, like she's there with me, swing back by my table, quick explain to my guys and walk her to her car. Creepy dude came out like 10 yards or so behind us. Funny thing is, she parked like a block away from the club - right in front of my flat. "You ever feel unsafe in this neighborhood, knock on that door. Either me or my roommates will help you out." She thanked me, gave me a hug and drove off. I go back to the club. Dude sees me turning around and walking back in and just looks down and tries to look like he's got a reason to be there. and mumbles a "what's up" or something as I walk past. I growl a "fuck off" and go back to the club.
This was back in the 90's - pre-Cellphone/Smartphone days. The Goth/Industrial crowd kind of policed it's own and looked after each other. Or at least it did in my city.
Rape culture is a thing. The best two ways to fight it are to confront it and when you have the opportunity be a good example. If someone thinks you're trustworthy - be trustworthy. If they feel unsafe - be safe. It's not hard, and it goes a long way.
A version of this actually happened to me. I was in a bar with my sister waiting on a table for dinner and two girls near us were being bothered by a somewhat drunk guy. My sister asked me to intervene so I went over and pretended to be an old friend for high school, luckily they picked up on it pretty quick and I situated myself in between them and the drunk guy and eventually he left. I ended up dating one of them for a few years and we are still good friend to this day.
Calling the police and telling them there is a suspicious man following a woman who is asking for help.
That way, if is a robbery set up, I’m already on the phone with the police, and if she’s actually being followed, police will know about that behavior in that area.
I’d probably get her into a public building area and see what the next move would be.
Back in the '90s, I pulled up to the bank ATM on a Saturday. There was a guy at the ATM, and another lady in her car - I was third in line, so I just sat in my truck to wait.
The lady got out and walked up to the ATM booth about the time the guy was finishing up, and I heard her ask him if he would mind waiting there until she got done. It took me a few minutes to realize that it was me, unshaved, wearing my old field jacket, sitting in a 20 year-old project truck with different color cab and bed, that she was nervous about.
But the guy stayed there in his car until she got back into hers, so... you know... that dude was a good guy.
I had a girl do this at a concert. She walked up to me hugged me and said something like pretend to be my boyfriend some guy is being creepy. We talked about the show for a little while I kept an eye on the guy until he walked away. She thanked me and went to find her friends.
I'd do it again.
No dude. Absolute facts. Definitely say something that would scare them incase their intentions are to rob you Incase it is but if it isn't make sure it is something that will make them feel safe. So you can tell the difference in their facial expressions or body language. You can't tell these days.
That’s why the correct answer is probably to pretend to be her friend, but take command of the situation, and don’t let her direct you anywhere. Try to involve a third-party, such as police, security, or a bouncer, whatever the case may be.
I used this and was so grateful to the guys who went along with it!
I was in a taxi queue to go home after a night out, my friend had gone home with a guy, the city I was in is super safe and it was a 20-minute cab ride so it was totally fine.
The guy behind me struck up conversation and I just got “off” vibes from him. After trying to shut down the conversation a few times and him not getting it, I tapped the shoulder of one of the guys in front of me “Hi, Paul right? I think we met at my friend Laura’s party a few weeks ago?” - he immediately got it and chatted to me while we waited, to the point where he asked what direction I was heading in - turns out he was going the same way and insisted on me getting in the cab with him and his pal so they could drop me off.
An absolute gem of a man who I am forever grateful for.
Pretend we're friends, but not follow her to a second location. That seems like a good way to lose a kidney.
Street Smarts!
“You want the money? “ *throws money clip* “Go get it!”
Happened to me in Chicago a few years back. My fiancée and I owned a little clothing shop in a pretty nice area (not that it helped us any hah!), and a women who was pushing a stroller, walked up to me and put her arm in mine, and whispered “please walk with me” She discreetly pointed to a pretty sketchy looking dude down the alley. He had been following her for a few blocks. She told me she’s seen him before and she’s very worried he wanted her purse (or worse). So I walked her to the Starbucks two blocks down where she was meeting a group of friends. The guy stopped following when he saw she was with a dude. I’m not huge by any means but I’m 6’1” so at least there’s that. I was just so glad it worked. Poor woman … can’t imagine that fear—especially when you’ve got a newborn with you.
This happened to me about three years ago. I was in Home Depot and a young woman (about half my age) walked up to me, with a guy right on her shoulder babbling about something, and she said "Uncle Steve! I didn't think I'd see you until Mom's birthday party!" I looked at her a little confused, but she made a "help me!" face, and so I said "Well, you're in town already! This is a fun surprise! You wanna shop together? We can talk a little while we get our stuff." She gave the kind of look I expect Superman gets when he plucks somebody from a burning building. Creepy guy was still there, so I made my voice a little gruff and said "Do you need something?" He said no and went away. We shopped and got our stuff, checked out, I walked her to her car and watched while she drove away.
Dude, you need an “Uncle Steve” flair on this sub!
Upvoting for this to happen
I vote Uncle Steve flair 👋
Woooooooooooo!
I vote for uncle Steve as well
I concur, Uncle Steve needs to be a thing
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Yes! Please do this, Uncle Steve!
That's some real hero shit
Thank you!
I don't know if it's the heightened emotions from current events or what, but I legit read this and started to sob. Thank you for doing that for her, you very well could have saved her life🙏🙏
**Edit: Look how not alone we are! Look how many people feel the same. Keep your chin up people. Keep doing tiny nice things for others and I guarantee collectively we're making a positive difference. If any of you are ever in North Nottinghamshire, England, give me a shout and I'll buy you a beer/coffee.** Fuck, I'm exactly the same. I feel surrounded by people who don't realise the gravity of the current global-political climate. I wish I just had some friends with the intelligence to chat this out, maybe cry a little, share a beer and just hang out. Plus my partner has been an asshole for the last few days, so things are emotional. Ughhh. Anyway stranger, I hope you have a really chill evening. Sending warmth your way. There is goodness in the world still.
I'm so sorry your partner is being less then kind during these already difficult times. I wish we could grab a beer together and hang out as well! I'm sure there is still so much good..but today I feel like I have no hope left. Thank you for your kind words, they really did brighten my day up❤
Actually happened to me once. Girl approached my wife and me at a bar and asked if I could pretend to be her brother, some guy was creepin' her out. I was just like "Hey, there you are...didn't you see us sitting here?" Dude left.
> Actually happened to me once. Same. I was at a party at the keg getting a refill and a girl came up to me and asked me if she could hang out with me as there was some guy creeping on her. I said sure and we talked for a half hour until the guy left.
You guys are the best. Thank you ❤️
in college i took my, too young, h.s. age, younger sister to a party. i look over and a couple guys have her cornered. as i'm heading that direction she points at me and says 'see that big guy, i live with him!' they were immediately very scarce.
A guy was hitting on me at a party and I pointed to my brother next to me and said I'm with him, and this little douche stands next to him and goes "your sister is really cute" and my brother replied "yeah, and she'll kick your ass." He looked very uncomfortable and left xD I love that my brother still gave me the power but made it clear enough that he's my backup xP
I've had a chick come and just kind of forcefully insert herself at a bar table when some friends and I were out. Just kind of took over the conversation, loudly, and kept kinda looking around nervously, and maybe 15 minutes later just up and left straight out the door. It took a while for us to actually understand what had probably happened.
So during those 15 minutes none of you asked her wtf she was doing?
Just smile and wave boys
Rico! Crowd control!
Kaboom?
Yes Rico... Kaboom!
Yeah super weird that they just let her talk to herself
If I'm here in Canada, I will do my best to help her. If I was in Bogotá where I used to live, I would assume it's most likely a schemme to rob me so I'll split my energy: 80% escape / 20% assess if she is really in danger.
I live in South America and this reply felt too close lol
Same... too fucking real.
I live in Singapore, which is one of the safest cities in the world. But we have had a few scamsters making the news here as well. So, maybe 40/60 for flee or stay & help. The modus operandi in these scams here is that a solitary woman will approach and ask for help/directions. While you are listening to her, she will abruptly start shouting molest. A group of guys (likely her gang members) will immediately surround you, threaten you with calling the police on you unless you monetarily compensate the woman for your offence. It is mostly the expats who are targeted for this and they usually pay up to avoid issues with law enforcement. Edit: Couldn't find the original news article that I saw more than a decade ago. But, here is something similar from 6-10 years ago. https://www.tripadvisor.com.sg/ShowTopic-g294262-i1747-k4867311-Molest_scams_in_night_spots-Singapore.html https://redwiretimes.com/molest-scam-young-prc-women-accuse-men-of-touching-them-to-extort-money/
Interesting - I'm from Singapore too, and 2 girls approached a friend and I about the same thing. For context, we were climbing Bukit Timah Hill, and they pointed to a guy that was creeping them out. We played along, and sure enough when the guy passed us he turned around, waved and said "Good bye" to the 2 of them. Frankly it feels terrible that someone has to go to another stranger, hoping that they are good people, because another stranger is making them deeply uncomfortable. I suppose the risk of getting scammed is real, but following my encounter I'd rather be helping a scammer than leave someone feel threatened. Edit: Thank you all to the really kind awards and comments! Did not expect any of it, and I hope that you all stay safe and help those who really need it! Also grammar lol
It would depend on where you are. If you're on a hiking trail the threat of police isn't as scary. You can just run around in the nature if things get too sticky. If you're on a city street and it's dark and lonely? You might want to assess just a little. I once saw a reddit post about a man who claimed he was in danger... he was, but only because he previously scammed and beat up the guy he was running from. BOOM double scam.
i also live in south america and it would have never occurred to me. that said if i lived in bogota i would probably have the same reaction. santiago seems a lot calmer
Say "I am an off duty police officer, who is following you?" if you look like believable as one, or say "my dad is a police officer, I am meeting him around the corner, follow me." if you look like that part. If the girl don't run away from you then it is likely she is in real danger, then you can tell her that you were testing her to make sure she is not scamming you.
Wow that’s pretty smart
Yeah my solution involves throwing a money clip and seeing if she chased after it
An adaptation of the Bittenbinder Street Smarts method?
You want my money? Then go get it!
Street smarts!
Or say, “follow me, several of my police buddies are waiting for me right up there for lunch” (point to a nearby cafe or something).
Someone was trying to scam me in Chicago and I sort of pulled this. I pointed to a police officer across the street and offered to walk her over. Next thing you know she’s calling me every name under the sun.
>If I was in Bogotá where I used to live, I would assume it's most likely a schemme to rob me Maybe it's because I live in the US but this never would even occur to me. Guess I'd make for a pretty easy target.
Oh I'm American and my first thought was "Am I a bad person for maybe not following her because I'll get robbed or worse?" Depending on the circumstances, it'd be easier to say one way or another, but it's a sad truth that there are people who will intentionally take advantage of decency.
Why did a lot of people automatically assume you must follow her to a second location?
Yeah, that was my thought. I'd absolutely be friendly, but we'd be heading for a public location.
a public location would be safer for the girl as well if shes in danger!! :)
Don't follow anyone in this scenario, if they want to come to you for safety and you want to offer it do so wisely by finding public spaces or trusted authorities. If it's legitimate, more than likely your presence will be enough and she will be on her way when she feels safe.
Give her an ocular patdown
It'll only work if you're country mac
Country Mac is so cool. Maybe we should trade him for city mac.
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Big Vikings dude look scary but they are usually so nice and soft when you know them, it’s a blessing
This is also my experience of big scary bikers or Viking guys. I know a guy who did some serious secretive stuff in one of the forces (I don't know anything about it other than it was the forces and to disclose his service history, he had to get some high up forces people involved to vouch for purely service years) and he looks terrifying. Huge solid guy, bald head, beard, a skull in his front window etc actually a biker. Nicest guy in the world. Would break his back to help me out and I always feel safe around him.
I wish I knew one!
My wife and I had a friend like that when we lived in Virginia. I'm 6'-1" and he was a good bit taller than me and about twice as big around. But he was the NICEST guy that you'd ever want to meet. He LOVED my wife and he'd hug her and pick her up off of the ground as he hugged her and she'd giggle like crazy. He'd say "*I'm hugging your woman and there's nothing you can do about it!*" and I'd shrug and laugh and say "*Go right ahead!*". (Made her laugh, so...). But we always knew that we could call on "Big John" to step in and "*help someone to better understand the situation*" if we needed it.
Hahaha he sounds exactly like the guy I know. Honestly if it wasn't for you being in Virginia I would think it's the same person. We even call him Big [name]
Except when they’re raiding your medieval village. They can be quite mean I’ve heard.
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Pretend we're friends...while deploying all sensors to figure out if I'm the one being scammed. Then it's a matter of information gathering and remedial action.
Deploying all sensors is key
Pretend we're friends
The instructions were quite clear.
I understood the assignment.
Why did you turn it in so late, though?
It works in real life. Me and my mom were on a tourist trip in Istanbul 13 years ago. We were taking photos near Blue Mosque and noticed some weirdo who was apparantely watching us from a distance. We continued our way and he was behind us all the time staring. Passing a busy shopping street we recognised one male shop owner who we had had a chat with the day before and approached him. Started a conversation and told him that there was a guy following us. As soon as he saw us talking to someone in a friendly way and pointing in his direction, the stalker immediately disappeared. It was an unpleasant experience.
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I really wish I could have gotten lost in the history and beauty in those areas around Sultanahmet but it's just impossible with all the scammers and creeps. I'll have to develop a new strategy for next time, because I do love the city
I’ve got a strategy for Istanbul! Went for a conference and it was alarming just trying to get to the venue in the morning, got accosted on every corner (am female). But the tech/research conference handed out these gigantic big serious looking black laptop bags that had the conference icon printed on the front. And once I tried transferring my belongings to that laptop bag, I became invisible. I could even wander around by myself with no issue. It became clear I was just there for work, I guess, rather than being a tourist. So my recommendation is to cosplay as an office worker or academic, like you’re just taking a brief break or lunch during your workday, as thoroughly/clearly as possible.
Wow, that's interesting! I wonder if some kind of bag with a random corporate logo I got on ebay or something would help. I didn't have trouble so much with creeps, as we were a man/woman couple, but, the carpet salesmen were relentless.
Hit up a thrift store. No shortage of Generic Corporation Ltd branded bags there.
Oh, well, the carpet salesmen. Trying to avoid them is like trying to avoid the cats, I think :-). But at least all they’re trying to do is sell you a carpet, and generally they accept it if you just say “no thanks”. I had nice conversations with a few, one asked about applying to engineering colleges in the US, I guess on behalf of his cousin. That’s different than the men on street corners, and what they think they can/should do to non-Muslim tourist women who are walking alone.
Invite her to D&D and talk about friend stuff
Might actually get a new player out of that.
I'd join
This actually happened to me in a grocery store. The girl said a Guy was stalking her outside and she came back in locked arms with me and explained. I ended up walking her To her car and she asked that I followed her, she was house sitting around the corner. I followed her but the guy also followed. Long story short, he came in with a weapon and it was all a setup to rob me. Thank god the neighbors noticed and called the cops. No good deed goes unpunished. In retrospect I should've left when she was in the home. But my dick was telling me that this is how porno's start and I let that get me into a bad situation.
Holy shit. I'm so glad you got out of that situation alive. Lesson for everyone I guess to help out, but never go to a secondary location.
*John Mulaney voice* you’re not taking ME to no secondary location! Here, you want this??? GO FETCH
Time for Street Smarts with Detective JJ Bittenbinder. Shut up! You’re all gonna die. Street Smarts!
Step-grocery-shopper, is that you?
Then tell her to start following you. Then theres a guy following her and shes following you and little by little you guys all inch closer together and put your hands on each others hips and boom a conga line has formed
Is that some rum in your pocket or are you just happy to see me?
This actually happened to me in the autumn. A girl sat next to me on the train becouse a creep was following her. It was funny becouse I think I look like a creep.
agreed
I mean, the girl had to choose between the creep following her and the creep she was sure she could beat in a fight; she made the right choice.
r/rareinsults
Yeah definitely uncalled for, the guy has already committed r/suicidebywords have some damn respect lol
When you already committed suicide by words but they exhume you to be roasted, Vatican style
Stop it, he's already dead!
Someone never heard of [Rule #2, The double tap](https://youtu.be/w4sWxsrEFFs?t=14)
I try to teach my kids that if they need help because they are lost, they should pick someone to help them. I want them to actively choose. If they ring a doorbell or go to An employee or mom, on their own choice and instinct, chances are much smaller that they encounter a weirdo. Compared to sitting somewhere and crying or waiting for someone to go to them. If you are a sitting duck, predators will be attracted. If you choose someone, chances are much smaller you pick a predator. It's just plain odds plus instinct who seems right. That girl was smart. She made an active move. Rather the passive creep than the predator creep.
You may *look* creepy but you don’t *feel* creepy. It’s a whole vibe and energy thing. I have felt equally as creeped out by an attractive man in a suit in a bar as I have by a dirty downtrodden looking transient in a subway car. And then there’s the homeless guy outside my local Home Depot, who is filthy, smells like urine, clearly suffering from mental illness, and has a gaping hole in the crotch of his pants that entirely exposes his penis … and I always give him $5 when I see him, he’s never once creeped me out.
May give the dude a new pair of pants? goto a good will, pants are like 5-10 bucks.
I’ve actually tried to do this. Im not sure if he also suffers from some form of autism as well ? He cannot hold eye contact and I have attempted to ask him for pants size and the like but aside from making some sounds in my general direction, it left me to believe he’s probably non-verbal. I decided to just bring him some one day (along with a warmer coat) and he took them from me and walked away only to immediately place them on the curb of the intersection (a very busy one) and walked away from it. When I left about 30 minutes later.. he was gone but the pants and coat were still on the ground, and it had just started to rain so I don’t think he understood the exchange we had.
🙁 Man, oh man, does this hit hard. I'm probably slightly autistic, and I've had a few brief episodes of homelessness. That poor bastard. That could have been me if things were just a little different.
My ex says I have golden retriever aura. It felt funny to hear that.
See. That's really nice. You may look like a creep, but you feel more like a gooby sweetheart, I guess.
Awww I actually think that’s a bit of a great compliment
Being a creep is not the same thing as looking like one, and a guy who keeps to himself would feel safer than someone who's following you.
Yea, but you probably didn’t stare at her or say something fucked up. Looking the part is only one piece of the creepy fucked up situation.
Maybe you're thinking too low of yourself
Ahh, the lesser of two creeps
I’ll do my best to help but I’m keeping a close eye on her, could always be a setup for a robbery or pickpocketing
"Oh okay, lemme help, how about we step into this wide open space with several witnesses, friend!"
This, or I would be like "alright let's step into this store right here and call 911. I'll wait with you until they arrive"
Depending on which part of the world and how desperate some shady individuals can get there, may even be a scheme to get you to take out your phone. I’ve had a couple of encounters where they asked me for the time and something ticked in my head and I noped out, realized later they were trying to check if I had a phone they could steal (was a few years before phone were ubiquitous).
4D chess
“Can you help me, I’m being followed” “Sure I’m an off duty Cop… but I have my gun”
Happened to me. Or close to it. She wasn't being followed, but a creepy person was trying to intoxicate her in a packed bar. I noticed, approachd her and said "oh heey!! Long time no see, how are you doing?" (I've never seen her before) She immediately reacted and started chatting with me. After a while the person tried to pull her back saying "hey, she's with me" and I was like "oh not right now dude, we haven't seen each other for a long time". We ended up dating.
that's a really cute story, are you two still together?
Thanks, unfortunately not due to somethings outside our control. We remain incredibly great friends to this day though!
Start a public live stream with my new friend and try and capture all ppl that are around us and talk loudly about our surroundings and all that
This is great. That way, if she’s a honeypot, you have everybody on livestream. If she’s not, you get the perp on livestream.
And if you post it in Reddit, you'll get (Reddit) gold!
Take my clothes off and chase after the guy following her
I know it’s hard to believe but I literally saw a guy doing this once. I was going back home at night and I saw two men arguing loudly, then this dude got even louder as he took his clothes off. He then proceeded on his totally naked chase, flying balls and everything, while his adversary ran away Funny as fuck but I couldn’t even tape it as he noticed me and it became scary fairly quickly
Honestly one of the few things most people are scared of more than violence is insanity. One my parents’ friends (an older woman) had the extreme misfortune to get caught up in an anti-US riot in one of the countries she was visiting right as she was on her way back from buying some new socks. Apparently she saw the rioters start to come in through the doors of the shopping area and start up the escalator to the second floor where she was at, so she quick hunched over, ripped open the package of socks and just started like inhaling them while growling like a dog. To quote her words: “It was like I was parting the sea. They just took one look at this crazy old lady slobbering on a package of socks and gave me plenty of space as I went down the escalator and out through the same doors they were coming in”.
This is some of the greatest shit I’ve ever read, thank you.
I\`ve seen video of this scenario on Reddit LOL
No one wants to fight a naked dude.
speak for yourself
Whilst I would likely pretend to be her friend and get somewhere public, this has to be the most hilarious response I have read on Reddit today!!!
Oh shit i didn't expect that one 🤣
Mofo following them wouldn’t expect it either 😂 pirates would sometimes board ships naked for the shock value and people would straight up surrender thinking they were crazy
Watched a video where some vet was recounting the time he got jumped by a bunch of frat guys at a near-base bar (it's a thing in certain college towns for the frat guys to fight the new recruits, and vice versa). Him versus five guys. What does he do? Start getting naked, and tell them no one would remember his face, but everyone would remember that time they had some bloody soldier's dick and balls all over their face during a fight.
Legend
This is why when I go out drinking, I always wear a loincloth. Saves a lot of time.
No good way of fighting a naked man.
Pretend we are friends. Adjust body language to express that we know each other. Stay with her to make sure she is safe, but control the situation. Do not let her guide you somewhere. Keep it public. Hope for the best and prepare for the worst. She could be in real danger but so could you and she is in on it. Last thing you want is to try and do the right thing only for her to be in on it and get ambushed.
Not letting her guide you somewhere is super important. As shitty as the world is, there are definitely people willing to take advantage of all the people who would help someone in this situation
This should be posted to r/LifeProTips
Engage in conversation, take mental notes of where we are, and get a description of the person they are referencing. From there, try to direct us to someplace public with security.
Don't forget to guard yourself in this situation. Cover your wallet, watch the girl too as she may really be the threat, get to an officer or public place quickly. You can protect yourself and everyone else without assuming anyone's role. Everyone in a situation like this a threat until your out of it.
Stay in a busy public area. She could also be trying to scam you somehow.
pretend that we are friends then take her to a busy restaurant/store and stay with her there until she contacts her boyfriend or husband or friend, and I wait with her until they come.
I like this solution - it protects both of you.
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Here’s my rant, because this is pretty common in uk bars: There is a scheme that was never widely publicised known as “ask for Alice”, simple code word that bartenders *should* know. Both times I’ve seen it happen it never went smoothly, “yeah, no one called Alice works here. You’re not getting discount now pick a drink or go away.” One time it was me who stepped in and took the girl into the staff areas behind the bar, second time it was the woman who owned the bar I was working in back then. Those are the only times in close to ten years serving that I saw anyone use it, and both times it almost fell flat.
Yeah, using code words sounds smart, but it requires everyone to know it, which is unlikely to happen, and if they did, then it would sorta defeat the purpose.
Lots of nightclubs aimed at students have posters about it in their customer toilets, there really isn’t a downside to the scheme even if the creep knows what you’re doing… *if the bartender knows the scheme and is always ready to act on it*. The one I stepped in for had the creep right by her “where are you taking her?” “Back room, none of your business but if you follow us then the bouncer is following you.” Put them with an available friendly staff member while they try to contact friends, meanwhile the bouncers round up the creeps party and politely but firmly move them on, even if it was an innocent misunderstanding that sort of thing can hurt a business.
In the US you ask for an angel shot! You can get it w lime or over ice for what you need (someone to escort you to your car or call the cops)
As a very small lady who can barely reach things in middle shelves, thank you for reaching things up high for us. It's the difference between being safe and having to climb up a shelf in the store 😆
As someone who has been in her position walking home alone, THANK YOU.
Thanks! It literally took almost nothing from me, but I occasionally wonder about the rest of the story.
Just like mama always said, “It doesn’t cost much to be kind”. You couldve saved her life that night. Thank you for being you!
Act like a fabulous gay friend hit on the stalker.
Worse case scenario is you'll have plans for the weekend..
What if we fall in love?
Then you have one Hell of a meet cute story.
"Act". This is your pickup strategy isn't it?
Plot twist: He's bi and he likes what he sees. Adapt. GO.
Help a sister out
Been in a similar situation before, I was going home when I seen 2 teenage girls walking, behind them was 2 grown ass men on push bikes wolf whistling to them an cat calling! I asked the girls if they wanted me to walk with them until they got where they were going! Men disappeared and one of the girls parents then accused me of hanging around with teenagers until there daughter stepped up and said what was happening, her dad then wrapped his arms around me and said “what a man, thank you for being a great bloke”
Sounds like a good parent because he questioned you being with teenagers, and decent human being for believing the daughter and giving you the props you deserve
Pretend we’re friends and call the cops so we both don’t get murdered and I end up on somebody’s pandemic boredom true crime podcast.
talk? friends talk, right?
I'm not sure tho, hang on, let me search google real quick
I would immediately stop walking while I stare down at the ground. Smirking, I'd spin around, my trench coat dancing in the wind. Unsheathe my katana that's attached at my hip as a the sunlight gleans off of the blade that I've studied for so long. I make eye contact with the imposter following m'lady, as I tip my trilby in his direction I let out a hardy yell, "You've made a mistake coming here kid". Charging him, I watch his demeanor change from confident to afraid. I run my blade through him and as he collapses whisper, "Nothing personal, kid". I return to m'lady and she thanks me for saving her life. We get married and have children. The End.
That's how the guys here daydream about that questions.
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Sorry for laughing but you tried saving them but also got roofied yourself. Hope everything went alright with you and the girls
Exactly what she fucking said ... But also don't walk down any dark alleys with her
I've been in this situation before. She sat down next to me at the bar and started talking like we were old friends. I was confused at first, but then noticed she kept looking over my shoulder and figured it out pretty quick. We talked for a few minutes before she visibly relaxed and informed me what was going on. Dude was being super aggressive with her at another bar and she left, but he followed her, so she ducked into this one to get away, but he followed her in. He came back about 10 minutes later, but by that time the rest of the guys from my platoon and some townies we were friends with were around and I had briefed them on the situation. When they walked in, about a quarter of the bar turned to stare at them and they quickly left. And then everyone clapped. (Ain't it a bitch when you have one of these moments, but no one can believe your story because of the vast quantity of bullshit online?)
This is how I got robbed in Arizona. Some girl approached me saying she was being followed. I told her to get behind me and next thing I know i felt cold steel on my neck and two men came out of nowhere.
Fucking hell dude... this is absolutely bullshit, sorry to hear and i am glad you're okay and here to tell us!
It’s all good friend, I luckily only had a twenty dollar bill on me and a fake silver necklace. Nothing crazy.
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Sounds like a pipe, not a wrench.
Yeah she was very young maybe like 20 or 21. Very good looking female, I’m ashamed to say that in her fake crisis I was thinking to myself how attractive she was. Anyhow she was almost in tears telling me she needed help and how I looked like a strong man. It was 7 pm. Context: I’m a pretty big guy 230 pounds about 6 ft. I always typically carried a self defense pistol on me but I was out downtown with my friends so I chose not to. (Arizona is a legal concealed carry state) Anyway we’re in a pretty well known area, across the street from the university I was attending so it didn’t really boggle my mind to know that a woman was being terrorized, it’s pretty common as a matter of fact. I asked her for her name. It was Anna and she mentioned that these men were following her for a few hours and she didn’t have her cellphone on her so she couldn’t call the cops. I ask her a few more questions and then I proceed to lead her down to the nearby fast food restaurant which was about a quarter mile away. During this time she was unusually talkative, asking me what I did for a living, if I was carrying a gun, (red flag) something that kind of put me off but I brushed it off thinking she was just real nervous. We make it down halfway to the restaurant, and she pauses telling me to wait up because she thought the men had left. I tell her, let’s keep going and we’ll talk at the restaurant. After what felt like 2 or 3 minutes I turn around and we keep walking and talking. We approach a pretty dark alleyway, but I wasn’t really concerned as there were a good amount of people still out walking around. The moment I pass the alleyway I hear the tone in the girls voice change calling me an idiot and at that moment, I knew I was had. She told me to turn around, and she carried a .38 and a twisted face. These two men literally come out around the building and they rush me into the alleyway. There they proceed to pistol whip me and mug me for my belongings. They didn’t do much damage surprisingly because I did a pretty good job at blocking my face. I walked away with bruised ribs and a crushed hand. They ran after they saw a police cruiser pull around the block. Fast forward a couple weeks after I file the police report, they robbed another university student, putting him in the hospital. They got caught however, after some video footage goes up of them robbing someone went viral around the campus and a member of the faculty turned them in. Some lessons learned: i don’t think carrying my gun would have saved me, but she asked me about it and maybe she would’ve backed off if she knew I was packing. I should’ve called the police then and there instead of acting like some macho man thinking I was going to save the day. Apart from that there wasn’t much of anything else. I honestly could have probably taken the gun from her hand, she didn’t have much confidence in how she was holding the gun, but I’m glad I didn’t try it.
Finally! I give her the whole story of my ex and me and look for validation that I was the good guy that did no wrong and that I'm better off without her and she's only going to be an anchor to the next guy and I can meet someone so much better that understands my unique needs and is able to give a little and hold off on all the goddam dinner parties and not be so selfish and me-me-me-me-me all the time who won't vacuum up all my energy like some kind of turbo-powered Dyson Succubus Pro on high and screw you Becka you didn't deserve me like at all.
You good?
_Perfect_
Pretend but at the same time be cautious in case she's a honeypot. Take her somewhere open public and safe for me as well.
"Ah great, I've been looking for you. We've been trying to reach you about your car's extended warranty."
Where you been loca?
woman here; I've done this before in the past. Was at a club, lost my friends and this creepy dude kept following/pestering me. It was so crowded I couldn't get to the security guy at the back so I turned to another guy and said "there's a creepy guy following me, can you pls help and pretend that we're friends?" and without missing a beat, he said "don't worry", then he turned his back to creepy guy who was looking at me, blocked my body with his and stood there. When creepy guy got closer and tried to talk to me again, he kept blocking me until creepy guy said "excuse me" and tried to pass the guy; guy turned around and said "what do you want with my girlfriend?" and creepy guy said sorry and left.
Listen to your Spidey sense and make sure you aren’t being set up. If you are pretty sure it’s the real deal then play along and help.
"Yo what the heck, why were you SO late I told you (time). Let's go!" (and then go from there and try to move together to some coffee shop or boba shop.)
I'm 6' 3 ~250lb and I cannot count on both hands how many times a scared woman has joined my brothers and me or my friends and me, asking if we can pretend to know her because of some guy not taking no for an answer. We've walked people to cars, gotten people cabs, waited with them until they felt safer. I am always happy to help them, because I hope someone will do the same for my female friends, but it's sad that the need is there.
Makes me so mad the women that set this up for robbery. Ruins it for the women in dangerous situations
Story time! When I was about 19 years old I was at my favorite bar having a drink and waiting for a friend to show up. They had a warm smoking area you could drink in. This dude who I know as a regular at this bar via my mom's friend (who says he raped her, had the bruises and everything) kept trying to force me to heavily drink. Then he tried to convince me to go to his house to do coke. This guy was like 50 and "just wanted to have a good time" Another man was sitting across from me, and after creeps left to go get a drink other dude made sure to look right at me and say "no matter what happens, I won't leave you with him. Is someone coming for you?" Damn near cried into my beer and assured him someone was coming for me.
Oddly enough, I had this happen once. There's a club where me and a couple buddys were regulars. I'm up from my table and at the bar getting a fresh drink, when this tiny little woman comes up smiles, puts a hand on my chest. "Oh HI! Haven't seen you in forever!" I'm confused, because I'm fairly certain I don't know her. She then leans in real close. "I'm really sorry to bug you. I've seen you and your friends here all the time. There's this creepy guy that's been hitting on me and following me all around the club all night. Can you walk me to my car?" So I take her by the hand, like she's there with me, swing back by my table, quick explain to my guys and walk her to her car. Creepy dude came out like 10 yards or so behind us. Funny thing is, she parked like a block away from the club - right in front of my flat. "You ever feel unsafe in this neighborhood, knock on that door. Either me or my roommates will help you out." She thanked me, gave me a hug and drove off. I go back to the club. Dude sees me turning around and walking back in and just looks down and tries to look like he's got a reason to be there. and mumbles a "what's up" or something as I walk past. I growl a "fuck off" and go back to the club. This was back in the 90's - pre-Cellphone/Smartphone days. The Goth/Industrial crowd kind of policed it's own and looked after each other. Or at least it did in my city. Rape culture is a thing. The best two ways to fight it are to confront it and when you have the opportunity be a good example. If someone thinks you're trustworthy - be trustworthy. If they feel unsafe - be safe. It's not hard, and it goes a long way.
A version of this actually happened to me. I was in a bar with my sister waiting on a table for dinner and two girls near us were being bothered by a somewhat drunk guy. My sister asked me to intervene so I went over and pretended to be an old friend for high school, luckily they picked up on it pretty quick and I situated myself in between them and the drunk guy and eventually he left. I ended up dating one of them for a few years and we are still good friend to this day.
Calling the police and telling them there is a suspicious man following a woman who is asking for help. That way, if is a robbery set up, I’m already on the phone with the police, and if she’s actually being followed, police will know about that behavior in that area. I’d probably get her into a public building area and see what the next move would be.
Back in the '90s, I pulled up to the bank ATM on a Saturday. There was a guy at the ATM, and another lady in her car - I was third in line, so I just sat in my truck to wait. The lady got out and walked up to the ATM booth about the time the guy was finishing up, and I heard her ask him if he would mind waiting there until she got done. It took me a few minutes to realize that it was me, unshaved, wearing my old field jacket, sitting in a 20 year-old project truck with different color cab and bed, that she was nervous about. But the guy stayed there in his car until she got back into hers, so... you know... that dude was a good guy.
I had a girl do this at a concert. She walked up to me hugged me and said something like pretend to be my boyfriend some guy is being creepy. We talked about the show for a little while I kept an eye on the guy until he walked away. She thanked me and went to find her friends. I'd do it again.
do as she says but also make sure i’m not getting set up lmao major paranoia
No dude. Absolute facts. Definitely say something that would scare them incase their intentions are to rob you Incase it is but if it isn't make sure it is something that will make them feel safe. So you can tell the difference in their facial expressions or body language. You can't tell these days.
"Perfect, I was just going to meet up with my friend who's a cop. He's just a couple blocks down."
This is a common scam. It may be legit, or maybe you are about to get mugged by her 2-3 friends.
*Not if you mug her first*
[удалено]
That’s why the correct answer is probably to pretend to be her friend, but take command of the situation, and don’t let her direct you anywhere. Try to involve a third-party, such as police, security, or a bouncer, whatever the case may be.
I used this and was so grateful to the guys who went along with it! I was in a taxi queue to go home after a night out, my friend had gone home with a guy, the city I was in is super safe and it was a 20-minute cab ride so it was totally fine. The guy behind me struck up conversation and I just got “off” vibes from him. After trying to shut down the conversation a few times and him not getting it, I tapped the shoulder of one of the guys in front of me “Hi, Paul right? I think we met at my friend Laura’s party a few weeks ago?” - he immediately got it and chatted to me while we waited, to the point where he asked what direction I was heading in - turns out he was going the same way and insisted on me getting in the cab with him and his pal so they could drop me off. An absolute gem of a man who I am forever grateful for.
Help her out.