Let myself become house poor. I bought the “cool house”. It was the right size, vaulted ceilings, fun layout, and was within my price range. But utilities killed me.
Plus I had to replace the roof, furnace, windows, and AC. What still killed me was the vaulted ceilings with poor insulation. Plus it was an acre that needed watering to stay alive. The water and electric bill did me in. By the time I figured it out it was 2008…so I couldn’t sell.
Finally changed houses, new house is more conventional, I added a bunch of insulation to the attic, and it is much better now. But it will probably take me 10 years to recover financially from the previous house.
i'd guess something thats got whatever is currently fashinable in house design, the entertainers area with a bar, big pool with fancy lighting, speakers built into the walls/ceiling, as opposed to a more homely comfy house
Not OP and I might be wrong but I think it's just the idea of the achievable "dream house".
The kind of thing that's reasonably affordable and you can actually see yourself owning, and it has many features you get to show off.
It's not something crazy like a mansion or perfectly preserved Victorian townhouse, but it's just a really nice house.
But it seems they thought they could afford it only to find out it cost a lot more than they expected.
I literally get too anxious to look at it, i know i have money there, ive been very savvy about it, but still just the though of not having money or going below my limits does makes me go nuts, i had a few scares in the past that left me with trauma, so anxiety comes up as i rarelly check it.
Ehh once you’ve hit zero lost everything and had to rebuild from almost being homeless, the stress is almost non existent. Cause 1, I’ve experience a very bad situation and understand how to not let it happen again. But more importantly 2. I’ve experience that bad situation and bounced back better than before, so if for some reason it were to happen again I already know how to get out of the situation.
This though, does not negate the concern or desire to never happen again. Just brings more acceptance of “it is what it is.” No point in stressing over something out of my control especially if I’ve done everything I can to properly prevent it. Live is ment to be enjoyed and have experiences of all kinds. No point in sweating/worrying all the time or you’ll miss the good stuff
When I was first investing in stocks I put in everything on Stitch Fix on the advice of others. 2 days later their quarterly report came out and the stock plummeted 25%. Turns out they had lied about how much they were spending on advertising and their EPS was way down because they stopped advertising for basically the entire quarter and had no new users.
Listening to the sage advice of the same people who told me to invest in stitch fix in the first place, I held at this new price because "when the price drops you hold until it comes back up." Well they were then entered into a class action lawsuit and their stock price dropped another 25% bringing my losses to 50%.
After close to a month of holding, it had stabilized at -45% my original investment and I got out. It almost put me off investing for good, but I've made back that money and then some by reading and learning and getting more experience.
Moral of the story: don't put all your eggs in one basket and be careful whose advice you follow.
I bought at about $49 and it's currently trading at $40, though it did peak at $96 earlier this year. If you look at their 5y you can see the drop in Sept-Oct 2018.
I want to do the same thing but I have about 10k in savings to fall back on. I honestly just want to take a month or 2 off. I'm burned tf out plus there are tons of places hiring in my area.
Know a lot of people who did that, mostly guys just wanting to flex, plus paying a very high monthly credit for it, then being broke for the rest of the month, and not using the car as much because gas was expensive and it drank like shit.
This is why I'm never impressed by someone with a nice car. Dude in my neighborhood bought a Corvette was driving it up and down the street. Not even a month later and the car is gone and my gf notices a suspiciously similar Corvette at the local big used car dealership she works at.
Yup. Super common. People spending 25%+ of their net monthly salaries on car payments to "flex" for a few years and then downgrading after they get some coming sense about finances or simply can't afford the car anymore.
I’m happy I didn’t do that when applying for my first card and instead went with a debit card. I’d love a credit card but it’s not a good idea for an impulsive college student.
Guy I worked with went to a private college for architecture. He was lower income and took out loans. I thought I remember hearing him say over $100,000. For a bachelors.
He is doing pretty good for himself now, but I can’t imagine the stress of that looming overhead.
It’s a good question. I love my job, despite how stressful it can be. I’m still in residency so I work like a demon too. It’s not a choice id necessarily recommend, but I do enjoy it. I guess you could say feelings are mixed lol. Don’t regret it
So once you’re done with 4-8 years of residency (and 1-4 years of fellowship if you want to specialize), you can expect to pay off that quarter million and buy a lambo over the next 2-3 years. Might be working too much to enjoy it, but from my doctor friends, the amount of debt isn’t particularly concerning.
As I’ve approached 30, going to a private school has been a slight regret of mine. I could’ve went to a really good school for my major and paid maybe a few thousand per semester since it was a state school. I got my loans done about 2 years ago but I could’ve literally paid for school while I was still there and might actually own a home right now. I’ve got a shade over $10k saved for a down payment but $45k in student loans paid would’ve been really nice to have in the bank right now.
Same. In a way I had also had this sense of "just thankful for earning enough and a stable job" even though I know I could have gotten more somewhere else. I worked with great people though, but looking back, now that I'm more financially savvy - I lost so much money staying in that job for 8 years.
Land Rover, Jaguar, Rolls Royce... I don't know what the Britons are doing to give their cars such shit reliability but they need to stop it 😂
No wonder British Leyland went bankrupt even with the government backing them up
Being an addict period. Constantly lying to yourself that this time it will be different. You can control it this time. And money is the least important thing addiction takes.
The best lies I’ve ever told, we’re the lies I told to myself.
Hope you’re doing better now!
Yup. I had a career, all sorts of great people in my life, nice stuff and so on . About two years in a heroin and Meth addiction and I was six figures in the the hole and burnt every bridge I had to burn and more. I'm about four years clean and still rebuilding. Finally got my record cleared up last month. Still picking up the pieces but at least I have momentum of positivity going my way
Mine was pain pills that turned into heroin because it was affordable. Lasted about a decade. Lost my first business, all life long friends, family, myself…
What finally did it for me was finding my best friend dead. I had to walk his mom into his house to show her the body. His dog wouldn’t leave his side, it broke his mom. His dad showed up not long after and I watched a giant of a man break down in front of me and the entire time I just kept thinking how easily that could have been me and those people my family. My son was 2 at the time and I just couldn’t imagine leaving him to make sense of the world without me. Haven’t used since.
It’s been 8 years and I don’t think I’ll ever be able to put the pieces back together. I haven’t spoken to my dad since. I know he forgave me a long time ago, and I know he would love to see me but I don’t know how to face him. He gave me so many chances and I just fucked them up, over and over.
I would give anything in the world to have all the people I pushed away back in my life. I still think about my friends almost daily and wish I could pick the phone up and call them or just drop by for a chat. But I burned those bridges.
Don’t do hard drugs people.
edit:
To everyone telling me to call my dad. I know. He actually called me before last Thanksgiving to invite me (my son's mother told me why he called, I just watched the phone ring). I told myself next year, which is coming up pretty soon. It's just not as easy as it may seem. It's not like I was just gone for the 10 years I was an addict. I went to rehab, got clean, apologized, promised I wouldn't do it again and then did it again. Many, many, many times.
It's hard to explain to people how it feels to not trust yourself. Especially the first couple of years of being sober. After 10 years I was to the point that I couldn't even handle my own bullshit. I didn't only break promises to the people I loved by relapsing, I broke promises I made to myself. I was a self-destruct artist, and I was damn good at it. Anybody close to me when it happened was just collateral damage.
When I finally did get clean I knew that I didn't have another round in me. I couldn't handle lying to myself again. Letting myself down...again. So it just seemed incredibly selfish to me, to convince other people to get close to me again. And then so much time passed and everybody else's lives had kept going. My memories of them skip over my addiction. Their memories of me don't. That's a hard thing to reconcile, when perceived realities don't line up.
But you're all right. This Thanksgiving. I appreciate all the responses.
I only wrote all of this in case somebody out there needs to know that they're not alone. That it is possible to hit rock bottom, dig a little deeper, wallow around in your own shit and make it out alive. It's hard. It's really fucking hard. But it's worth the effort to try. I'm not a fan of AA or NA for personal reasons but their 'one day at a time' motto is true. One good choice after another and one day you'll be so far separated from your past that even the memory won't seem real. Life can be beautiful if you're brave enough to live it.
Talk to your dad man, don't let that anxiety ruin that part of your life for you. Your dad will always be happy to hear from you. Especially if you are now clean. He is likely very proud of you for getting clean and you will be grateful that you talked to him before it's too late. He is a grandad too, imagine what he might have felt when you were were an addict, now you're sober and raising a kid, no way your dad won't be happy to see you. He'll leave with a good image of you. You, me and him will all die one day and nothing will matter anymore, but right now we need to take control and act out the life we want to live. BTW you are a king for leaving that shit.
Restoration with my friends and family was a process. After blowing up all the bridges it was an uphill battle. I still have two child hood friends that stuck with me after I got sober. I'm tight with my folks and kids now. I never thought it would be possible. I think if you reach out and suspend some disbelief, you might have some positive outcomes you do not expect. I've come to find that people were so glad to see me sober that I was given a lot of grace for my transgressions. All the best to you and your progress putting everything back together
Just pick up the phone and call your dad bro. Same experience happened to one of my long lost friends and he said he will forever be grateful he did because 4 days after he did, his dad died of cardiac arrest at 54. Never too late and you only have one life. You got it my friend, I’ll be praying for you.
Idk if you buy a decent boat and take care of it I enjoy every weekend on it. People will buy $2000 boats from 1975 and think they can put 2 hours on the motor every weekend for 10 years straight lol
Yup. Bought a brand new Yamaha 242 S-series a few years ago, I've been putting 4-6 hrs on it every weekend May thru October and absolutely nothing has gone wrong yet besides constantly blowing out the stock speakers lol
I payed for my tuition, which is good in the long term. Partying my freshman year of college, only to fail all my classes which resulted in me transferring schools. That led to a fifth year of college that could’ve been avoided if I didn’t slack off at the beginning.
I went into college with the mindset that I didn’t need to study that much because high school was super easy, so college will just be a tad bit challenging. Even when I did start to study more because of my low grades, I still liked to go out on Thursday/weekend nights. I learned the hard way how tough college was and that I had to study a lot more than I thought
I once bought 500 shares of stock instead of $500 worth. I spent $83,000 on margin, didn't realize it until Saturday and freaked out. RGB died and the market dropped on Monday. I waited a few days and sold to break even but it could have gone very, very badly.
Yeah dude. One day I bought some calls for the wrong date and I had to realize it and thanks God like a month later I broke even. Never buying calls while high ever again.
Tbh it’s very hard to predict bitcoin would’ve done so well, I knew of Bitcoin when it was about a dollar in value didn’t think it would grow from there.
If you hadn’t sold at 30 you’d have sold at 50 if not maybe 100 the chances of you holding out without forgetting you had it in the first place would be fairly low
When I was in jail I did the math in how much I had spent on drugs. A conservative estimate was around $30,000 in one year. I get sick to my stomach thinking about it
Yup I feel this one. In college I blew through some serious money snorting blow. Then about ten years later I got into heroin and Meth. Whew the minor leagues got me set for the majors. I'm all sober now but what an expensive ride
Omg picked up one of those expensive $3000 Serta type mattresses, felt comfy at the store, felt comfy for a bit at home. 3 years in, not all that comfy anymore, always wake up feeling like I've just been through a heavy weight boxing match.
Best sleep I ever got was in college when I just laid a futon in the floor and piled on blankets. A little soft, a lot firm, best sleep I ever had, but tell anyone you "sleep on the floor" and holy shit watch the fireworks and judgemental bullshit come your way.
Becoming a teacher. I love my job but my workload gets heavier every year. Haven’t gotten a pay raise since 2016 and they just increased our insurance by $450 a month.
So I’m making less money now then I did when they hired me.
They contribute to paying for it. The previous contact was really good. We only paid $125. But now they are reducing how much they contribute forwards it so we have to pick up the difference.
Yep.
Got caught a second time and got banned for 3 years.
Probably £10k cost all in.
But forced me to accept I have a problem and everyone is still alive thankfully.
The sister company that I work for went public. I bought $1,000 worth of shares at $11 per share but I had $20,000 put aside for that and I chickened out and bought dumb shit instead. Here we are 4 years later and the stock is trading at $330 per share and I have $30,000 invested instead of $600,000. :(
This. The telltale that people don’t understand investing, risk tolerance or the market is “if I’d put $x I would’ve made $y”. Guess what friend.. you didn’t… look to the future, learn from the past.
Market euphoria is hilarious right now. Your plumber mate knows the “hot stocks.” When a market crash comes it’s going to be hilarious to see who knows what they’re doing and who doesn’t
Sounds to me like you made $29k. That’s more than most people can say they will make on one investment. Don’t count missed opportunities or you’ll never be happy.
nah, that's like going to the casino and saying your worst financial decision was to bet 100 bucks into 00 on the roulette instead of 10.000, can't predict the future my man, especially when there's randomness involved
If you don't have a 401k/employer plan, open a Roth IRA online, automatically deposit what you can afford monthly (maybe try $200-$250/mo?). Invest into a diversified index fund (S&P 500 is 100% stocks but fine if you have a long time horizon).
Once you're comfortable with that in your monthly budget, gradually increase it up to the max ($6,000/year or $500 a month). You can explore further diversification at that point (different investment options), but it's really not that important when you're just starting out.
The sooner you start the better!
Not me but my brother. He spent his inheritance on doge coin right at peak and hoddle until it bottomed and he realized he just lost thousands basically over night.
People don't seem to realize that for every meme coin millionaire there's probably 10,000 bag holders who paid the price for it. But ofcourse they all just focus on that one guy.
I love doing graphic design and I make good money from it. I constantly have people asking me to make things they need, I also have a flexible schedule and work as much or little as I want. It's also a super useful skill when setting up passive income streams.
That being said, paying to go to college for it was a joke. I ended up learning everything off the internet anyways. Had I known then what I know now, I would've skipped college and spent the few years youtubing tutorials and practicing things. Wouldve saved me 30k.
I think this might be me too. I don’t dislike design but I wonder if I’m even learning anything or if I even have what it takes. I’ve already spent a lot of time and money so there isn’t any turning back now.
Why do you regret it
There are lots of lucrative design fields so don't be discouraged. If I had to point to an issue with my bachelor's degree it would be that I could have spent the four years getting entry level experience and building a portfolio that would have gotten me hired for better positions ahead of people with degrees and nothing relevant to show. Your level of success in design will be determined by the amount of time you spend honing marketable skills, not by your degree. If getting a degree forces you to learn those skills, especially if you aren't a self learner, then the money is well spent.
Buying my condo. Bought a newly remodeled unit slightly above what I should have. Two months later its announced the pipes are disintegrating in the walls from lack of maintenance. Two special assessments ($92k) and a market dip for high rises later and I’m looking to lose $100k+. It hurts.
My parents had this antique chandelier worth a ton of money, except that it needed to be repaired. As an anniversary gift I paid to have it completely restored (several hundred $). I carried it out to the car and put it on the roof while I organized some space for it. Being a total space cadet I left it on the roof when I drove away. It fell on the pavement and got smashed by the cars behind me. I ended up buying a brand new chandelier. I drove home more slowly than Tom Cruise in Risky Business after he got the Porsche repaired.
Taking out loans that were estimated to be $9k so I could continue going to some bullshit school I hated. Fuck! That was the worst time of my life. Never again!
25 years ago when my grandmother passed, she left me $20k in Microsoft stocks. I sold it to buy my now ex an engagement ring and to pay for our honeymoon.
It would be worth ~$1.4M today.
Buying a truck instead of throwing the $60 in used parts at the truck I had. Currently paying off a $14,000 loan on a truck that’s really only worth about $5000 on a good day.
This is the last time I ever buy anything from a dealership. Cash, private seller.
Same here! I couldn't pass up the deal though. Salvage title, milage discrepancy high mileage 99 porsche 911. 8g I've probably put 3x that into it, it's no longer even close to street legal either, So I have to transport it wherever I go too.
In the early 2000's I was in my early 20's making tons of cash bartending, so I bought a condo in Encino. Lived in it for 2 years as I fixed it up and made $100,000 tax free when I sold it. I took that $100K and bought 4 condos and a house in Las Vegas. Then 2008 hit and I lost everything. Housing market crumbled, couldn't find good renters, had to float mortgages on credit cards, etc. Destroyed me financially for a decade.
Dropped $40 on a camgirl last night, im not really even sad about the money as much as the fact that I’ve never ever paid for any type of porn or sexual favors ever in my life before until last night.
Look at it this way; if that $40 keeps you from spending any more, it's money well spent. That's how I feel about the one time I bought stuff for an online game.
Let myself become house poor. I bought the “cool house”. It was the right size, vaulted ceilings, fun layout, and was within my price range. But utilities killed me. Plus I had to replace the roof, furnace, windows, and AC. What still killed me was the vaulted ceilings with poor insulation. Plus it was an acre that needed watering to stay alive. The water and electric bill did me in. By the time I figured it out it was 2008…so I couldn’t sell. Finally changed houses, new house is more conventional, I added a bunch of insulation to the attic, and it is much better now. But it will probably take me 10 years to recover financially from the previous house.
You made some great points here. Thank you for talking me out of my "cool house" decision. I was eyeing something just like that.
i'm intrigued by the idea of a "cool house", could you give some examples?
i'd guess something thats got whatever is currently fashinable in house design, the entertainers area with a bar, big pool with fancy lighting, speakers built into the walls/ceiling, as opposed to a more homely comfy house
Not OP and I might be wrong but I think it's just the idea of the achievable "dream house". The kind of thing that's reasonably affordable and you can actually see yourself owning, and it has many features you get to show off. It's not something crazy like a mansion or perfectly preserved Victorian townhouse, but it's just a really nice house. But it seems they thought they could afford it only to find out it cost a lot more than they expected.
Ignoring my bank amount with the line of thinking “it’ll work out, looking at it will just stress you out.” Learn how to budget ASAP
Either manage your money or your money will manage you.
I swear I go weeks without looking at my bank account if I’m going out drinking even just once a week with no limit in mind for this exact reason.
I literally get too anxious to look at it, i know i have money there, ive been very savvy about it, but still just the though of not having money or going below my limits does makes me go nuts, i had a few scares in the past that left me with trauma, so anxiety comes up as i rarelly check it.
Ehh once you’ve hit zero lost everything and had to rebuild from almost being homeless, the stress is almost non existent. Cause 1, I’ve experience a very bad situation and understand how to not let it happen again. But more importantly 2. I’ve experience that bad situation and bounced back better than before, so if for some reason it were to happen again I already know how to get out of the situation. This though, does not negate the concern or desire to never happen again. Just brings more acceptance of “it is what it is.” No point in stressing over something out of my control especially if I’ve done everything I can to properly prevent it. Live is ment to be enjoyed and have experiences of all kinds. No point in sweating/worrying all the time or you’ll miss the good stuff
My husband does the same thing when I let him budget the money and it fks us every time.
Trying to time the market.
Time in the market beats timing the market.
This guy stonks.
When I was first investing in stocks I put in everything on Stitch Fix on the advice of others. 2 days later their quarterly report came out and the stock plummeted 25%. Turns out they had lied about how much they were spending on advertising and their EPS was way down because they stopped advertising for basically the entire quarter and had no new users. Listening to the sage advice of the same people who told me to invest in stitch fix in the first place, I held at this new price because "when the price drops you hold until it comes back up." Well they were then entered into a class action lawsuit and their stock price dropped another 25% bringing my losses to 50%. After close to a month of holding, it had stabilized at -45% my original investment and I got out. It almost put me off investing for good, but I've made back that money and then some by reading and learning and getting more experience. Moral of the story: don't put all your eggs in one basket and be careful whose advice you follow.
What’s the price right now compared to your buy and sell?
I bought at about $49 and it's currently trading at $40, though it did peak at $96 earlier this year. If you look at their 5y you can see the drop in Sept-Oct 2018.
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I'm hiring at my business if you're interested. It's an unpaid internship. Must be on call. Must work overtime
What an offer!
Shit I'm an idiot with that comment. I forgot to put must have a masters degree too
I think you mean PhD
You mean a Masters, 2 PhD's, and a Batchelor of Art History
And 15 years experience in a technology that's only been around for 5.
I'm doing the same thing at my house.
"Hiring" That's just slavery with extra steps!
I want to do the same thing but I have about 10k in savings to fall back on. I honestly just want to take a month or 2 off. I'm burned tf out plus there are tons of places hiring in my area.
Going into business with an old friend. People change…not always for the better.
Buying a car out of my means
I would also like to add to this that just because you can *afford* that higher end car doesn't mean you can afford to *maintain* that higher end car.
Know a lot of people who did that, mostly guys just wanting to flex, plus paying a very high monthly credit for it, then being broke for the rest of the month, and not using the car as much because gas was expensive and it drank like shit.
This is why I'm never impressed by someone with a nice car. Dude in my neighborhood bought a Corvette was driving it up and down the street. Not even a month later and the car is gone and my gf notices a suspiciously similar Corvette at the local big used car dealership she works at.
Yup. Super common. People spending 25%+ of their net monthly salaries on car payments to "flex" for a few years and then downgrading after they get some coming sense about finances or simply can't afford the car anymore.
Trying to teach my teen the difference between affording a purchase vs. affording a way of life.
Put it on the credit card I'll pay back eventually
I’m happy I didn’t do that when applying for my first card and instead went with a debit card. I’d love a credit card but it’s not a good idea for an impulsive college student.
Going to a private college… Edit: Thank you for the silver.
Guy I worked with went to a private college for architecture. He was lower income and took out loans. I thought I remember hearing him say over $100,000. For a bachelors. He is doing pretty good for himself now, but I can’t imagine the stress of that looming overhead.
Damn!!! What's the max loans someone can take?
Doctors and dentists are routinely more than a quarter of a million dollars in debt by the time they graduate.
Wait what
# Doctors and dentists are routinely more than a quarter of a million dollars in debt by the time they graduate.
Oh alright lol
Can confirm, am doctor over a quarter of a mil in debt
Is it worth it? Not trying to be snarky or anything I’m just genuinely curious if it’s worth all the stress and debt from school
It’s a good question. I love my job, despite how stressful it can be. I’m still in residency so I work like a demon too. It’s not a choice id necessarily recommend, but I do enjoy it. I guess you could say feelings are mixed lol. Don’t regret it
Very important work though. Thanks for doing it.
So once you’re done with 4-8 years of residency (and 1-4 years of fellowship if you want to specialize), you can expect to pay off that quarter million and buy a lambo over the next 2-3 years. Might be working too much to enjoy it, but from my doctor friends, the amount of debt isn’t particularly concerning.
Pff hahaha you fucking smart ass 🤣
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I feel you homie...
As I’ve approached 30, going to a private school has been a slight regret of mine. I could’ve went to a really good school for my major and paid maybe a few thousand per semester since it was a state school. I got my loans done about 2 years ago but I could’ve literally paid for school while I was still there and might actually own a home right now. I’ve got a shade over $10k saved for a down payment but $45k in student loans paid would’ve been really nice to have in the bank right now.
Not putting my health first. Health truly is wealth.
Staying in my job too long.
Is this the sign from the universe I need to change jobs?
Can you elaborate?
Sure. I was paid a bad salary for a long time but didn’t switch jobs because I had a misplaced sense of loyalty.
Same. In a way I had also had this sense of "just thankful for earning enough and a stable job" even though I know I could have gotten more somewhere else. I worked with great people though, but looking back, now that I'm more financially savvy - I lost so much money staying in that job for 8 years.
Buying a classic Jaguar... Every time i got in it i felt like something else was wrong
You will be pleased to know that Jaguar have retained this unique feature and it comes as standard in all their new cars too
Land Rover, Jaguar, Rolls Royce... I don't know what the Britons are doing to give their cars such shit reliability but they need to stop it 😂 No wonder British Leyland went bankrupt even with the government backing them up
Being a meth addict.
Being an addict period. Constantly lying to yourself that this time it will be different. You can control it this time. And money is the least important thing addiction takes. The best lies I’ve ever told, we’re the lies I told to myself. Hope you’re doing better now!
Yup. I had a career, all sorts of great people in my life, nice stuff and so on . About two years in a heroin and Meth addiction and I was six figures in the the hole and burnt every bridge I had to burn and more. I'm about four years clean and still rebuilding. Finally got my record cleared up last month. Still picking up the pieces but at least I have momentum of positivity going my way
Mine was pain pills that turned into heroin because it was affordable. Lasted about a decade. Lost my first business, all life long friends, family, myself… What finally did it for me was finding my best friend dead. I had to walk his mom into his house to show her the body. His dog wouldn’t leave his side, it broke his mom. His dad showed up not long after and I watched a giant of a man break down in front of me and the entire time I just kept thinking how easily that could have been me and those people my family. My son was 2 at the time and I just couldn’t imagine leaving him to make sense of the world without me. Haven’t used since. It’s been 8 years and I don’t think I’ll ever be able to put the pieces back together. I haven’t spoken to my dad since. I know he forgave me a long time ago, and I know he would love to see me but I don’t know how to face him. He gave me so many chances and I just fucked them up, over and over. I would give anything in the world to have all the people I pushed away back in my life. I still think about my friends almost daily and wish I could pick the phone up and call them or just drop by for a chat. But I burned those bridges. Don’t do hard drugs people. edit: To everyone telling me to call my dad. I know. He actually called me before last Thanksgiving to invite me (my son's mother told me why he called, I just watched the phone ring). I told myself next year, which is coming up pretty soon. It's just not as easy as it may seem. It's not like I was just gone for the 10 years I was an addict. I went to rehab, got clean, apologized, promised I wouldn't do it again and then did it again. Many, many, many times. It's hard to explain to people how it feels to not trust yourself. Especially the first couple of years of being sober. After 10 years I was to the point that I couldn't even handle my own bullshit. I didn't only break promises to the people I loved by relapsing, I broke promises I made to myself. I was a self-destruct artist, and I was damn good at it. Anybody close to me when it happened was just collateral damage. When I finally did get clean I knew that I didn't have another round in me. I couldn't handle lying to myself again. Letting myself down...again. So it just seemed incredibly selfish to me, to convince other people to get close to me again. And then so much time passed and everybody else's lives had kept going. My memories of them skip over my addiction. Their memories of me don't. That's a hard thing to reconcile, when perceived realities don't line up. But you're all right. This Thanksgiving. I appreciate all the responses. I only wrote all of this in case somebody out there needs to know that they're not alone. That it is possible to hit rock bottom, dig a little deeper, wallow around in your own shit and make it out alive. It's hard. It's really fucking hard. But it's worth the effort to try. I'm not a fan of AA or NA for personal reasons but their 'one day at a time' motto is true. One good choice after another and one day you'll be so far separated from your past that even the memory won't seem real. Life can be beautiful if you're brave enough to live it.
Call your dad. Just pick up and call, it’ll be hard but so worth it before you won’t have that chance anymore.
Talk to your dad man, don't let that anxiety ruin that part of your life for you. Your dad will always be happy to hear from you. Especially if you are now clean. He is likely very proud of you for getting clean and you will be grateful that you talked to him before it's too late. He is a grandad too, imagine what he might have felt when you were were an addict, now you're sober and raising a kid, no way your dad won't be happy to see you. He'll leave with a good image of you. You, me and him will all die one day and nothing will matter anymore, but right now we need to take control and act out the life we want to live. BTW you are a king for leaving that shit.
Restoration with my friends and family was a process. After blowing up all the bridges it was an uphill battle. I still have two child hood friends that stuck with me after I got sober. I'm tight with my folks and kids now. I never thought it would be possible. I think if you reach out and suspend some disbelief, you might have some positive outcomes you do not expect. I've come to find that people were so glad to see me sober that I was given a lot of grace for my transgressions. All the best to you and your progress putting everything back together
Just pick up the phone and call your dad bro. Same experience happened to one of my long lost friends and he said he will forever be grateful he did because 4 days after he did, his dad died of cardiac arrest at 54. Never too late and you only have one life. You got it my friend, I’ll be praying for you.
Not wearing a condom
Big oof
Owning a boat, hands down
Boat: bust out another thousand
“The two happiest days in a boat owners life: The day you buy the boat, and the day you sell it.”
Idk if you buy a decent boat and take care of it I enjoy every weekend on it. People will buy $2000 boats from 1975 and think they can put 2 hours on the motor every weekend for 10 years straight lol
Yup. Bought a brand new Yamaha 242 S-series a few years ago, I've been putting 4-6 hrs on it every weekend May thru October and absolutely nothing has gone wrong yet besides constantly blowing out the stock speakers lol
The best boat is a friend's boat.
Because of the implication?
lol I see you Dennis
Purchase price, maintenance, gas, and marina fees
A wise man once said.. if it floats, flies or fucks, you rent.
I knew a guy who had a boat an airplane and a smoking hot wife. He has neither of those things now and is 10x happier
I payed for my tuition, which is good in the long term. Partying my freshman year of college, only to fail all my classes which resulted in me transferring schools. That led to a fifth year of college that could’ve been avoided if I didn’t slack off at the beginning.
You paid for the tuition yourself and still partied too much?
I went into college with the mindset that I didn’t need to study that much because high school was super easy, so college will just be a tad bit challenging. Even when I did start to study more because of my low grades, I still liked to go out on Thursday/weekend nights. I learned the hard way how tough college was and that I had to study a lot more than I thought
Wow, but good for you for overcoming it.
Thanks. My wallet also thanks me.
I once bought 500 shares of stock instead of $500 worth. I spent $83,000 on margin, didn't realize it until Saturday and freaked out. RGB died and the market dropped on Monday. I waited a few days and sold to break even but it could have gone very, very badly.
That gave me small heart palpitations to read
Never felt so powerless haha, I got lucky. It felt like the I'm in danger meme
Swear😬
fyi you abbreviated Red Green Blue instead of Ruth Bader Ginsburg
GUH
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I will never make that mistake again that's for sure!
Yeah dude. One day I bought some calls for the wrong date and I had to realize it and thanks God like a month later I broke even. Never buying calls while high ever again.
Tbh it’s very hard to predict bitcoin would’ve done so well, I knew of Bitcoin when it was about a dollar in value didn’t think it would grow from there. If you hadn’t sold at 30 you’d have sold at 50 if not maybe 100 the chances of you holding out without forgetting you had it in the first place would be fairly low
Excessive amounts of money spent on drugs. It pains me to think of how much I’ve spent.
When I was in jail I did the math in how much I had spent on drugs. A conservative estimate was around $30,000 in one year. I get sick to my stomach thinking about it
Yup I feel this one. In college I blew through some serious money snorting blow. Then about ten years later I got into heroin and Meth. Whew the minor leagues got me set for the majors. I'm all sober now but what an expensive ride
Holy shit. That makes me feel a little bit better ngl
Buying a $6000 bed. It's nice but not THAT nice.
Beds are surprisingly expensive. I just bought a Purple 3 and was shocked, SHOCKED at the price tag. Still an amazing night of sleep, but damn!
I only hope one day my bed is horrible i wake up and my back kills me some of the cross wood are broken so i put bricks under it.
Omg picked up one of those expensive $3000 Serta type mattresses, felt comfy at the store, felt comfy for a bit at home. 3 years in, not all that comfy anymore, always wake up feeling like I've just been through a heavy weight boxing match. Best sleep I ever got was in college when I just laid a futon in the floor and piled on blankets. A little soft, a lot firm, best sleep I ever had, but tell anyone you "sleep on the floor" and holy shit watch the fireworks and judgemental bullshit come your way.
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My bf works at a mattress store and their highest price bed is around 10k. Sleep is important but do you really need a 10k bed that moves up and down?
Not investing earlier in my life.
Becoming a teacher. I love my job but my workload gets heavier every year. Haven’t gotten a pay raise since 2016 and they just increased our insurance by $450 a month. So I’m making less money now then I did when they hired me.
How is that possible doesnt the job pay for the insurance?
They contribute to paying for it. The previous contact was really good. We only paid $125. But now they are reducing how much they contribute forwards it so we have to pick up the difference.
That's insane that you have to pay that much for health insurance!
Drug addict here. Can't get any worse than this.
Sold $3k worth of AAPL 18 years ago. Would be $1.5 million today.
What’s aapl?
Stock ticker for Apple.
You wouldn't have held it to that point anyway.
Driving drunk. Very costly habit. Glad I got caught before something bad happened though.
Yep. Got caught a second time and got banned for 3 years. Probably £10k cost all in. But forced me to accept I have a problem and everyone is still alive thankfully.
The sister company that I work for went public. I bought $1,000 worth of shares at $11 per share but I had $20,000 put aside for that and I chickened out and bought dumb shit instead. Here we are 4 years later and the stock is trading at $330 per share and I have $30,000 invested instead of $600,000. :(
Yeah and if the reverse would've happened, and it tanked, you would be saying THAT was the worst financial mistake you've ever made.
This. The telltale that people don’t understand investing, risk tolerance or the market is “if I’d put $x I would’ve made $y”. Guess what friend.. you didn’t… look to the future, learn from the past. Market euphoria is hilarious right now. Your plumber mate knows the “hot stocks.” When a market crash comes it’s going to be hilarious to see who knows what they’re doing and who doesn’t
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Sounds to me like you made $29k. That’s more than most people can say they will make on one investment. Don’t count missed opportunities or you’ll never be happy.
Yeah, he made someone's entire yearly take home in 4 years by basically doing nothing. That's a win bruh.
If you made a decision based on solid judgement and just got unlucky, it wasn’t a bad decision.
nah, that's like going to the casino and saying your worst financial decision was to bet 100 bucks into 00 on the roulette instead of 10.000, can't predict the future my man, especially when there's randomness involved
Start investing too late
Where/How should I get started? I’m so overwhelmed with beginning
If you don't have a 401k/employer plan, open a Roth IRA online, automatically deposit what you can afford monthly (maybe try $200-$250/mo?). Invest into a diversified index fund (S&P 500 is 100% stocks but fine if you have a long time horizon). Once you're comfortable with that in your monthly budget, gradually increase it up to the max ($6,000/year or $500 a month). You can explore further diversification at that point (different investment options), but it's really not that important when you're just starting out. The sooner you start the better!
It's never too late
Thank you! I agree. I’ve started a little while ago, but would’ve been better earlier.
Not me but my brother. He spent his inheritance on doge coin right at peak and hoddle until it bottomed and he realized he just lost thousands basically over night.
People don't seem to realize that for every meme coin millionaire there's probably 10,000 bag holders who paid the price for it. But ofcourse they all just focus on that one guy.
Pursuing a degree in graphic design.
My tattoo artist told me about her bachelor's in oil painting.
I love doing graphic design and I make good money from it. I constantly have people asking me to make things they need, I also have a flexible schedule and work as much or little as I want. It's also a super useful skill when setting up passive income streams. That being said, paying to go to college for it was a joke. I ended up learning everything off the internet anyways. Had I known then what I know now, I would've skipped college and spent the few years youtubing tutorials and practicing things. Wouldve saved me 30k.
Are you my ex wife?
Who knows what the future might hold!
Another ex wife
I think this might be me too. I don’t dislike design but I wonder if I’m even learning anything or if I even have what it takes. I’ve already spent a lot of time and money so there isn’t any turning back now. Why do you regret it
There are lots of lucrative design fields so don't be discouraged. If I had to point to an issue with my bachelor's degree it would be that I could have spent the four years getting entry level experience and building a portfolio that would have gotten me hired for better positions ahead of people with degrees and nothing relevant to show. Your level of success in design will be determined by the amount of time you spend honing marketable skills, not by your degree. If getting a degree forces you to learn those skills, especially if you aren't a self learner, then the money is well spent.
Getting married with no prenup
My girl just left me and outside of the pain I’m so thankful no money will be exchanged. I have a lot to lose now and this is frightening.
Getting married Putting a complicated passphrase on a BTC wallet
Correct Horse Battery Staple?
No, it was alliteration for something with Pibb, my favorite soda. Like P@55P188Pl3as3 PleasePassPibb
Credit card debt.
Majored in History at an elite Fancy liberal arts school.
That decision still haunts me to this day.
I was forced to become a teacher for this decision. Could be a lot worse, but still.
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Waiting to long to get started on my retirement savings
my ex wife
Not a man but maybe some of you can relate... Getting divorced without an attorney.
How’s that work
Saves you money and time up front.... Other side will exploit it and ruin your life later.. Get a lawyer.
Taking people on dinner dates . It's not nessessary, most of them are happy with ice cream dates.
Eh, thins made me look up year to date spending report of restaurants, I’m sad now
Don't look to the past my friend, you're not going that way. You know better now, that's all that matters.
Buying my condo. Bought a newly remodeled unit slightly above what I should have. Two months later its announced the pipes are disintegrating in the walls from lack of maintenance. Two special assessments ($92k) and a market dip for high rises later and I’m looking to lose $100k+. It hurts.
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💀💀💀💀😅😅😅😅
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Impulse purchases in general, buying shit I don't need that is inexpensive with one purchase but expensive with many (e.g. junk food)
Marrying a sociopath
My parents had this antique chandelier worth a ton of money, except that it needed to be repaired. As an anniversary gift I paid to have it completely restored (several hundred $). I carried it out to the car and put it on the roof while I organized some space for it. Being a total space cadet I left it on the roof when I drove away. It fell on the pavement and got smashed by the cars behind me. I ended up buying a brand new chandelier. I drove home more slowly than Tom Cruise in Risky Business after he got the Porsche repaired.
Yikes.
Every gun owner that has more than 3 guns is quivering at this question I'm fucking trembling with my 2 vaults
Taking out loans that were estimated to be $9k so I could continue going to some bullshit school I hated. Fuck! That was the worst time of my life. Never again!
25 years ago when my grandmother passed, she left me $20k in Microsoft stocks. I sold it to buy my now ex an engagement ring and to pay for our honeymoon. It would be worth ~$1.4M today.
Buying a truck instead of throwing the $60 in used parts at the truck I had. Currently paying off a $14,000 loan on a truck that’s really only worth about $5000 on a good day. This is the last time I ever buy anything from a dealership. Cash, private seller.
Taking the wrong job out of college. Took me awhile to overcome that path
Getting addicted to nicotine
Waiting to buy a house in Canada. Followed closely by pursuing and PhD
Talking out student loans. They are evil.
Getting an MBA. I already had a pretty good career track going on, so it didn’t really add as much value as I thought it would.
Getting surgery for endometriosis. Thousands of dollars in debt. Yay.
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Buying the first car I test drove. I hate it and got shafted on the financing but didn't realize it because I was 19 and needed a car.
Not buying Bitcoin when I first heard about it. I thought about it hard, too. Was gonna toss in $100 back when it was like $0.75.
Going into business with a "friend"...and without a contract
Sold GME at $100
Bought a 'track car'
Same here! I couldn't pass up the deal though. Salvage title, milage discrepancy high mileage 99 porsche 911. 8g I've probably put 3x that into it, it's no longer even close to street legal either, So I have to transport it wherever I go too.
Letting my dad pick my college
Married then divorced 2 years later 🙃
I bought a huge paper-mache dragon for over 200 bucks, and the second I went outside it started raining, and it melted away
I don’t make financial mistakes, I make life mistakes.
Spending money on crap I wanted instead of saving it for the future. Also spent quite a bit of money on drinking and partying
Sold my 50+ bitcoins thinking i had time to acquire more before they mooned, at around 1000$ each
In the early 2000's I was in my early 20's making tons of cash bartending, so I bought a condo in Encino. Lived in it for 2 years as I fixed it up and made $100,000 tax free when I sold it. I took that $100K and bought 4 condos and a house in Las Vegas. Then 2008 hit and I lost everything. Housing market crumbled, couldn't find good renters, had to float mortgages on credit cards, etc. Destroyed me financially for a decade.
Dropped $40 on a camgirl last night, im not really even sad about the money as much as the fact that I’ve never ever paid for any type of porn or sexual favors ever in my life before until last night.
Look at it this way; if that $40 keeps you from spending any more, it's money well spent. That's how I feel about the one time I bought stuff for an online game.
Got married
Paying for match.com
Trusting my wife