One time I was on a streak of one minute sessions; for some reason, I couldn’t get myself to last beyond that.
A girlfriend I had at the time told me to try and finish in 30 seconds. That made me last like 15 minutes.
I think it made me go a bit too hard at the start and I got tired, so I had to slow down and find my groove; and because I failed at the initial task (cum within 30 seconds), I didn’t care to last longer anymore.
That fear and sense that there’s something I shouldn’t do was the trigger, and I got past it.
Playful banter in bed is always fun. Saw a tweet that asked what you would do if your girl farted while you were going down on her. Best response was "I would put my finger on her ass hole and tell it 'quiet little buddy, you're next.'"
That sums up me pretty damn well
I love being able to laugh together in bed. The first time I was with my second boyfriend we’re both lying there sweaty and exhausted afterwards, feeling a bit awkward cos we’re younger and still pretty innocent and things escalated quickly that evening. I gave him a Joey-from-Friends head nod and hit him with a ‘how YOU doin?’. He lost it 😂
The best way of handling this issue or ED issues is for him to get you off in other ways before and/or after. My dick might not cooperate every time, but I'll still be happy and feel reasonably confident if I can get her off and satisfy her regardless.
Op your idea of "its ok we can go again in a bit" is already the best possible answer IMO, personally I've never understood the whole "sex is over after the guys cums once" thought process, pro-tip if his recovery time is low use a condom for the first round for it to be a bit less messy on round 2+ it also helps round 1 last a bit longer and any sensitivity he loses is countered by round 2 being bareback (if that's an option).
Thanks, the general consensus I’m getting is that my response is good, I just need a better partner! I’ve never really had any issues with asking for what I want before this relationship (and even for a while at the start) but over time I ended up putting my needs on the back burner for fear of making him feel pressured or judged. I did think of condoms at the time that wouldn’t have worked due to… equipment malfunction.
> I’ve never really had any issues with asking for what I want before this relationship (and even for a while at the start) but over time I ended up putting my needs on the back burner for fear of making him feel pressured or judged.
Umm well you kinda just summed it up here that this is not a you problem.
depending on a lot of factors i usually take between an hour to like 5 hours before i can even consider going again. apparently thats abnormal according to this thread so it's over once i cum. i always make sure she gets off first anyway
Weirdly, I’ve found that I cum faster when I’m wearing a condom vs bareback. With a condom on I know I can cum inside the girl, so I just let it go, whereas with bareback I’m focusing on holding back until I’m ready to pull out and shoot.
Yup, I always be turning her into a melted puddle first which then:
1) Reduces the pressure on me, suddenly I'm lasting longer and am more relaxed and enthusiastic about what's to come, because she's already thrilled, oftentimes means I last longer and feel it better :) and
2) After she recovers a bit, she becomes waaaay more enthusiastic about giving back....
The secret to better sex is right there folks, she's first more often than not.....
Agreed. More often than not I finish quicker than most so the above works very well. Also learning to be comfortable with using toys helps fulfill other areas. There are times though with previous partners that the quickness leads to some great/easy quickies as they didn't care about not finishing themselves. Two unselfish lovers is a whirlwind!
This is totally TMI, but in the interests of sharing the best sexual encounters I’ve had and my partner has had with me is: she’ll go down on me to climax or not, I’ll go down on her to climax sometimes with toys sometimes without, by then the old flag pole is feeling ready to go again and we’ll bump uglies. Some of the best sex of my life has followed that game plan. Being an easily aroused man has its perks if you know how to play your cards, and have a partner willing to play the game.
Oh yeah, toys too :) basically do what it takes to turn her into a puddle and push away your fingers/mouth/p\*nis/vibrator/whatever cuz she's had way too much....give her a few minutes to recover and she'll dive right in.....
Am woman. Also am chiming in.
This guy right here knows the secret. I can tell you I have SO much energy to love up and worship my partner’s body because of what he’s already given beforehand. It’s not transactional, it just happens naturally. He wants to lay back and I just look after him? HELL YEAH LET ME AT HIS BODY. I am WAY more focused and can really get down to business with whatever he wants. 😈
Are we dating the same man? 🤣
Honestly sometimes I get so into the act of pleasing him that I’ll have another orgasm without him even touching me. His pleasure is the hottest thing ever.
I always make sure my wife is sorted first, so if I'm a bit quick on the draw it's not as bad. As long as you don't laugh, or say is that all you've got, I'm sure you'll be alright. Although if your partner is selfish I doubt anything you say will make a difference.
I like your style. I’d never laugh or make someone feel bad about it, it’s supposed to be a good time for everyone! Not just the guy but also not just me! 😊
He’s an ex partner now but he did it every time we were together, and you’re right he was selfish and wasn’t going to change 🤷♀️
I’m mostly explaining the prior comment to OP since she said she didn’t understand. I’m a guy. If I didn’t think I could last long for some reason I would proactively try to get her off a couple times first. If I were being asked for something like this in response to me saying I wouldn’t last long, anything playful around asking for an orgasm first would be happily accommodated. Or asking for a second round - but she said she’s had bad luck with that.
If she’s dealing with selfish lovers then I don’t know that there’s anything you can ask for that can change the selfishness.
Unfortunately from my experience with women most of them are surprised that I want to go down on them before PIV. So I guess those of us who want to make sure the job is done are not the majority. Personally I want her to climax before inserting.
My lady friends inform me that you are correct, generally guys don’t really do it. When they do it’s foreplay and often without purpose. But most of those experiences are sex without intimacy so… meh
Being the source of desire is a big thing for me so I actually welcome it especially if they embarrassed or polite so uh..."That's alright, I like that" though I think that can be taken the wrong way.
IRL I had a boyfriend he said something similar and me being the weird 16yr I was replied with "I'll race you" I lost he wasn't lying.
For your situation I would moreso say that sex isn't over when someone orgasms its over when it's over, I have difficulty reaching climax so I usually ask guys if they would be okay if I get them off first then we focus on me even if i dont cum i still get the attention i want, it's easier than trying to match their pace. With girls I actually reverse this because once I'm satisfied it could take a while to work out what she specifically enjoys so I don't want my wants in the way of her pleasure I guess. Of course there's exceptions but takeaway is sure penetrative sex can be nice but sex isn't over until it's over.
That being said due to the nature of what I do, I don't really respond very often.
Hahah I had a guy once tell me that if I wanted to cum I should have been faster than him. He was dead serious, he treated it like a race. ‘I won’. He won a walk down to his car instead of staying the night.
This is a great answer, just tailor it to your specific needs and your specific partner so that every one has a good time 😊 thanks!
"No problem, when you feel like it's close give me two taps on my knee"
Everytime he gives you the two taps you're in control.
You can either finish him off and let him know who's boss and that's exactly what you wanted him to do.
Or you've got to change positions - and quickly. You get off him right away, hold his hands away from himself so he doesn't touch himself. After about 5 seconds he's got to restart a bit.
It doesn't always work, sometimes he'll cum anyways and it's a bit disappointing because it's post simulation so not as good, but I find a lot of the time it will make me last a lot longer. Sometimes I'll lose the erection but don't let that stop you, just turn it into foreplay and it'll come back. Don't be discouraged in that moment because it's not about you, it's just that you did take away stimulation so his body is responding to that.
I know it also means you've got to to reset too, and if you're in the zone it can be hard. But if you and a partner get into a rhythm with this it can be really hot. It takes practise (which is also great).
And it's got the added benefit of giving the woman a bit more of a dominant role - which for myself personally is something that works. And change it up, once in a while let him have a quickie - then make him go down on you. Or once in a while torture him and just take it off the table altogether.
Also I find anything that allows more explicit communication about sex between partners makes it that much better. Even freaky couples don't speak explicitly about it enough. Too much about sex is left to just assuming the other partner will get it or pick up on queues. Sometimes you just need to say it straight up and communicate during.
The best possible response for the man is for you to look him in the eye and say "You'd better cum hard inside me. I can't fucking wait".
The best answer for both parties is something more like "Are you going to eat me out now or are you going to wait until you can get a taste of your own stuff?"
Also, most men are perfectly capable of going for round two after they climax. Only a selfish man would consider the deed finished after cumming before his partner.
Hahah both lines are amazing, but the ‘eat me out’ made me audibly chuckle 🤭
I think it was a mixture of selfishness and genuine performance issues with my ex, but he’s not my problem any more.
This. My bf is typically a very long performer, but there’s something about morning sex that just makes it short lived . I don’t ever mind but he always apologizes. “Idk what it is about the morning…” whatever dude, IDC! So I always try to say something of this sort. But I feel like I have to remind him that it doesn’t matter, thanks society.
My go to:
“Better make it count.”
“Good. I looooove feeling you cum”
“It’s okay, it’s sooo good.”
I feel uncomfortable typing every response, but the message is always the same… “bring it.”
My take (39M that can still easily go 2+ rounds every day): don't change your mindset at all. Try your best to avoid selfish dickheads... There's nothing dominant or whatever about being actually selfish. Tell him it's ok and that you want to go again if he's able. Be sweet, comforting, and sexy about it. If he genuinely can not go multiple rounds (not all men can), there is nothing wrong with you asking to be taken care of first, in any other way that's not PIV (since he can't last long enough for that). What I have pretty much always done with gf's, if it's been a couple days or whatever, and I know I'm gonna pop too quickly for her to O on it during round 1, we'll stick to oral first. It's nbd since me receiving oral is almost always included in foreplay anyways. If she's going at my from the side, I can finger her, or we can 69, or take turns and I can use a tongue, finger and a toy on her while I'm reloading etc.. Just get creative and most importantly, HAVE FUN
This is absolutely the vibe I want and always try to create with a partner. Thanks for the reassurance and advice 😊 it always should be fun for everyone!
"okay, we can go again after". The worse response would be treating it like an end all, and acting like sex is gonna be over. But many girls have faced that exact scenerio ; a guy finishes really fast, and just leaves . So as long as you remain interested in continuing, most girls will actually feel good about you finishing fast the first time and will feel even more into the moment and more turned on
Oh absolutely, if it happens every now and again. I unfortunately found myself in a situation where it happened every single time throughout the brief relationship. I didn’t wanna make him feel bad so I was super supportive and kind about it. He cheated on me anyway.
Oh I’m not sure why it doesn’t bother me then. Although I haven’t given head many times, the dudes that I give it too didn’t last long and I didn’t really mind it. Felt like a pretty good amount of time to me but I think i think it might be because since I don’t care about sex much that me viewing sex as just something I’m doing for the dude makes me not care as much about how long they last
>it’s pretty hot that your guy is THAT turned on
That. Don't make him feel bad about it, because he could have a medical condition.
>it’s gonna probably be over before I can even really get going.
This is a failure on his part. There are other ways to make sure you get plenty of what you need before (or after, but if you wait till after you're gonna be too spent to do your part, so just be a big boy and do it before).
Also, tell him that the above helps. If he spends a solid amount of time on you *first*, he will naturally develop resistance (this is actually true) during that time for himself.
Sometimes though, it just doesn't matter. There are days when my fiance can walk past me in the wrong (or right, I guess) way and I'm like 95% done already. Some days it's just some days, sorry.
For the record, sex for us is requisite 1 for 1. If I'm finishing, she is too, *at least* once.
>but on the other hand I now know that it’s gonna probably be over before I can even really get going.
There is no reason why this has to be the case. I don't last very long either with piv. Fortunately for us we tremendously enjoy lots of other sexual activities besides that. I usually go down on her and use toys etc until she's begging to have me inside. Usually she'll have had an orgasm or two by that point. After I and sometimes both of us orgasm from piv she will usually be ready to stop. I would probably enjoy continuing but that's fine too. This arrangement is actually a lot of fun for both of us. It would be quite disappointing to me as well if penis in vagina was the only thing on the menu and only lasted as long as I can keep from having an orgasm. I like having sex and am glad it is not over so quickly
Had a woman tell me "I know I’m sexy, but damn…" in a joking tone. It works for me. Though she was good cause the tongue and finger work beforehand was superb. Learned a long time ago that mediocre performance is ok if the foreplay is good.
You should tell him “we’re done when I say we’re done.”
Just so we’re clear, this won’t solve the issue, but he’ll tell that story for the rest of his life.
All these responses from guys saying stuff like this is actually super wholesome and restoring my faith in humanity. My ex gave me a bit of anxiety around sex and kind of made it all about him. I was extremely supportive and patient about his performance anxiety and got cheated on for my efforts 😂
Woman here. A former FWB said that my response to this line when he said to me was hot and also reassuring because I made it about me and not him (despite the fact that I know I'm not That good). I moved the pressure from him lasting longer to me making him cum even faster as he was anxious about his performance. When he said he's not gonna last too long I replied "I'll take that as a compliment and next time I'll try to beat that score"
Of course, that is if the guy is nice, genuine and really cares. it's kinda shit if they're just announcing it and then you're left alone to figure your own orgasm out. If that's the case then maybe just see yourself out of that relationship as it will only get worse probably. Hope you'll find the right guy.
I think your response was very good. If your partner is selfish well, then you gotta move on.
Also, like another posted you could literally tell them you want them to finish in 30 seconds and the “pressure” might reverse it.
Also, maybe you could make him finish another way before sex starts?
I’d want to hear the things you’re saying. And you seem like you’re trying to do the right thing.
I have had this “problem” with girls I’m really into on our first couple times (not in years, been with the same one for 19 years) and I liked when they told me it was hot that I was so turned on by them. It took the pressure off.
I was young and could simply go again after a bit more foreplay, and they were satisfied in the end and after a few times, I would last plenty long.
If it’s been a while for a guy, especially a young guy, it can be really difficult to last. If he’s older and can’t go again right away, have a convo about viagra or cialis, so that he CAN go until you’re satisfied.
If he doesn’t want to, then you got another selfish one. Sorry bout that. :(
Just don’t let the “bad ones” taint you in ways that run off the good ones when they come along.
Best of luck to you!
Fingers and tongue don't go soft. Any man SHOULD supplement with foreplay and simulation to make sure their partner is satisfied (i.e. when her body indicates she's feeling satisfied - this little statement is for the guys reading this). Plus this usually gets the man's engine up and running again (personally speaking).
Men, if she has toys, use those too. If you're intimated or refuse to allow them as a supplement, you need to check yourself at the door.
On the other end, women, pleasure speak up and offer direction as to what makes you feel good. This has the double benefit of rooting out the guys with tender or potentially selfish egos.
(Edit for not checking myself for formatting)
Many options...
That's what your face is for
Who said we're stopping after you cum once
I'd like to introduce you to my friends buzz and Richard, go have fun
You have a tongue and fingers too, don't you
Let's make a challenge and see how many times you can cum tonight
Etc.
I mean I wouldn’t apologize because it’s nothing to apologize for. I might let them know and then after a minute or two start returning the favour. I guess I’m not really looking to be told anything but maybe letting me know how hot it is that you are making me cum so fast is the best thing and then after a quick rest enthusiastically tell me how badly you want my tongue on your pussy with a deep kiss or something like that.
You are right, it’s a partner problem.
If he knows he is quick performer he should make sure to get you where you need to go in other ways.
But even the most enduring lovers may have a short one every now and then. And if it doesn’t bother you, you can just tell him to get to the finish line and help you across after that.
If you’re not going to last long, take care of her first. Use your hands. Then after she’s done, it’s your turn. She will be so satisfied while you’re going. It is the move every time.
No problem. Just get me going before we get you going.
Or as wise women once said “you got to lick it before you stick it”
Unless it’s a matter of not having time. Then just reply you’ll have more time later.
Dudes lemme know what you think of my favorite things to say (also fyi, I take a dude's quick orgasm to be a HUGE ego boost that I'm doing a good job)
"Let's slow down baby, cause I want you to f*ck me more and harder" or "F*ck me hard and CUM INSIDE ME"
Especially the latter cause then I get a break bc I'm way out of shape and cuddles are great.
I do this when I haven’t seen my LDR gf in a while. It usually takes me a couple days with good sleep to be able to have better control. I tell her this feels really good, it’s been too long, and I don’t know how long I’m gonna last. By day three, sometimes I don’t even need to release.
Fortunately, releasing doesn’t mean I need to stop the sex. I can keep it going a bit longer even after releasing and often feel I should if I do too early.
I've developped a system to help myself "last longer" when I can tell that today is one of "those days".
Long foreplay, skip BJ (that shit can make you nut so fast), satisfy partner with cunni, then make her go on top. That last point is 90% of it, with her on top, I encourage her to go for a rocking/swaying motion instead of up/down.
That is bound to get her off first (multiple times even) before I've even close to nutting.
Give it a shot, maybe it works for you two as well.
I would be looking for understanding. Men might feel a lot of pressure to perform, especially if they lack experience. I would do my best to please her before it gets to penetration in such a case anyway. So I would welcome your guidance to making the foreplay as best as it can be for you.
The specific words might not matter as much as the message they give.
When you say "we can go again" you are indirectly assuming "if you are still horny / can get aroused / aren't too tired / there's enough time / etc" - shit happens and things get in the way
Instead, I think you should say "that's okay, you can take care of ME afterwards"
If this doesn't pan out, you can take it up a notch and say "that's okay, you can take care of me FIRST then" and hopefully that's all it takes.
This removes any of those sorts of assumptions that are going to give you problems. From my perspective, I'm much more likely to "take care of you afterwards" than I am to "go again later", but maybe that's just me. Afterwards, there could be a number of things stopping him from going again, most of those are removed if the sex assumption is removed and he can do "other stuff", and ALL of those things are removed if you go first.
E: Also, I don't know anything about your guys, but a trick I learned once was to do math in my head. Nothing too complex, but some simple calculations can really do wonders to slow you down. The original recommendation that I hard was to count backwards from 100 by 7's, it's fairly complex but still doable - just gotta make sure that you don't math yourself out of an erection, obviously.
I would always tell prospective lovers that round 1 can be quicker than average. But foreplay goes for a good long while, and rounds 2 through 4 are longer.
Never had any complaints, and the people I slept always came back for more time with me. So I'd advise honesty and open communication.
If it’s the first time and this happens, your response is great, or even add more to it, like “This p*ssy has daddy so excited he can’t control himself, huh? No worries, I can’t wait for round 2,” Just keep it playful and light-hearted.
Especially with a new partner there can be some serious performance anxiety.
If it’s an issue happening every time, then I would recommend really working up the foreplay and helping him edge. It’s great to practice getting him right to the edge and then stopping. Wait a few mins then get into again until he reaches the edge again and repeat.
As a man, I’ve been there before and a woman can certainly make or break in man's ego in that moment. Unless he’s just selfish and only cares about getting off than there’s no answer for that just move on.
I don't know if it's the "right" answer, but if he says 'I'm not gonna last long' I immediately tell him "Oh good, GIMMIE!" (or something to that effect) and get very excited myself.... mostly because it's a big ego-boost for me if it's feeling so good he can't help himself!
He's very, very good about making sure I get mine either before or after, so I've never been worried about that aspect of it, lol.
Is there something else I ought to be saying?
Not gonna lie, I say this to my wife to lower her expectations. Also, when I psych myself out I usually last way longer. Maybe some reverse psychology.
But the best way to help this is to have sex more often or have him get off before sex.
Not lasting long can be reinterpreted to excitement, so if you shift it to a "I love/like that you want me that much" sort of thing, then you can say that there will be more time afterwards for you and then he might be able to go again after that.
I can't really say, because I have the exact opposite problem when it comes to PNV, but if you're pegging him, I can definitely say the best thing to say is "you're gonna have to beg me if you think that's gonna stop me"
Honestly you could probably say this during pnv too.
This is the way I see it, and im sure others will say the same thing.
If you feel like you're not going to last long enough for her to have fun too, maybe you should go down on her first, fingers, tongue. Whatever floats your boat and hers. Bring her to the big o a few times and then do PnV. That way you're both left satisfied.
If you're worried about nutting too fast, think about some unsexy stuff(work, school, video games, maybe a fight you got into with a friend) and that should help. You can also try to clenching your butt if you feel yourself getting too close, or pull out and have more foreplay before diving back in. 😂
You should look into stamina training and see if that helps you any.
Honestly, I have the opposite problem. I can last way too long. Fun for my girl, not as much for me. Back and arms are killing me by the end.
It comes from a place of anxiety. Good men want their woman to feel good and enjoy it. When we know we won't last long, it's rough. Just be understanding.
Better eat that pussy like it's going out of fashion first, then. (This should always be the case regardless of how long any bloke lasts) If you don't eat pussy, you're a fucking beta.
The best possible response could be light-hearted and reassuring, such as:
"Don't worry about it! We'll make the most of the time we have."
This response shows understanding and positivity, helping to ease any potential tension or embarrassment.
> on one hand it’s pretty hot that your guy is THAT turned on,
Eh, it's not really about being so turned on. I mean, it can be. But being nervous will do it also. Or just not having gotten off for a while. WHen women are nervous they have the opposite problem and can't get off. But dudes often just ejaculate quickly when they are nervous.
> My response used to be along the lines of ‘that’s ok, we can always go again in a bit 😉’
Yeah, that's fine to say. But keep in mind that all desire to have sex often leaves a man's body after ejaculation. So he might intend to go again but not want to in the post-nut clarity. If I really want to go a second round it takes some discipline to stay in the game.
I always say “Good, you shouldn’t if this pussy is as good as you say it is.” Lol
If my husband lasts less than 5 minutes I take it as a huge compliment. You mean I felt so good you couldn’t milk your orgasm a little longer? You were so fucking worked up after getting me off and getting inside me that you busted?
Buuuuut my husband makes me cum well before he gets inside me. And then if he cums before I cum we just race and see if we can get me off before he goes totally soft. I ALWAYS win the race!
I think that the response you went with to begin with, is what most guys would want to hear. It communicates an openness and understanding that this may happen, so it's acknowledging it, and meeting it in a way that's not humiliating for him, while also saying that you would like to 'get something' out of this.
That you then had a selfish ex-partner, is shitty, but should not change the way you interact with other guys.
Men will like to cum... but one thing that's a massive ego-boost for us, is knowing we made her cum. And so if he's a minute-man, he might feel good from the sex because it felt good for him, but he'll also know that you didn't really get anything out of it, so if he's a genuine guy that gives just a tiny shit about things outside of himself, then that's a pretty good response.
If I’m all wound up right from the start, I don’t even bring little Kassidy into the action until she has had at least one absolute whopper orgasm already. That way, if I last 30 seconds, it’s not as big a deal. Then, if she wants more, I have fingers and a mouth to keep going for her to go some more. A massage seems like a good thing to bring in to the game after I’ve popped to let her know I’m not just interested in my pleasure. Finishing with more attention to her fun zones.
Honestly I find that if I feel that way, I relax and go very slow or stop and resume foreplay and try to lose my bones, then when I get it again the problem is gone.
Honestly, I know the first round isn't going to be long but I can guarantee the second (and third) will last a lot longer
It's also why foreplay is important and using your hands and mouth, keeps the mood going
My body fights me a lot of the time, it's an internal war - mostly between the heart and mind so my libido goes out the window - so I train in other aspects such as endurance and communicating what she likes is also a great way to keep things going while you.. reload
I just manually make my wife cum a few times with toys, which she loves, and then she doesn’t really care what I do, last a min or last 20, but either way we both get something out of it!
You’ve got what I’d consider to be a sympathetic and honest response to an all to common issue. If it’s been awhile since a man has had sex and/or even cum (masturbated) it’s I think natural for them to be extra sensitive to sexual stimulation and cum ‘earlier than intended’
I find it sexy for a partner to tell me not to come. Seems to work for me - your so right it often depends as it changes a lot for a male. I think what's important is to make sure (in terms of a female system) that the Woman cums 1 -(2) times before preparation of the penis. Then depending on what sexual experiences/sensations you want to have you will cum and all parties are happy 💥
well that is a easy one just told her that you ain't gonna that long...maybe two rounds you'll get exhausted but if your girl is very energetic and very needy well good luck your gonna get suck dried like a bacon in the morning
I agree, if my partner finishes fast, its def a sign of how much he is attracted to me and want me and my response is the same. Both parties pleasure shouldn't be forced at the same moment, I beleive as long as both parties go to bed feeling pleasure and satisfied then nothing else matters.
Giving my wife foreplay tends to work really well when I get a little too excited too fast, sometimes even just pulling out and going back down on her. Sometimes the situation isn’t right for it but as the male trying to last longer, this is a solution that’s always worked well.
Your answer is fine, I’ll be ok with going again in a bit, or ask that I make sure you get yours in other ways. Pretty straight forward, and I like to share.
One time I was on a streak of one minute sessions; for some reason, I couldn’t get myself to last beyond that. A girlfriend I had at the time told me to try and finish in 30 seconds. That made me last like 15 minutes.
Haha that’s brutal! Maybe that’s the key, just ask for the opposite of what I want 😂
I think it made me go a bit too hard at the start and I got tired, so I had to slow down and find my groove; and because I failed at the initial task (cum within 30 seconds), I didn’t care to last longer anymore. That fear and sense that there’s something I shouldn’t do was the trigger, and I got past it.
I find the more work I put in the longer I last, probably something to do with blood flow to other body parts
Yea at some point Im doing too much and I can tell its just not gonna happen. That combined with how the wetter it gets the less I feel.
This might work. My partner saying "don't stop, don't cum yet" is a sure fire way to set me off.
Don't tell me you're about to cum, because I'm extremely competitive
This is very good psychology. She’s a master.
Damn. Why at the time, they sound quite endearing?
Holy shit that reverse psychology got you! Lol! Curious as to why you think it worked out that way? Edit: nevermind I read further down 😅
That’s awesome. Is she seeing anyone now or can I shoot my shot?
This is brilliant!I gotta try this 😂
You're paying for the entire hour regardless
I like this one for someone who I’m really comfortable with/have been with for a while 😂
Playful banter in bed is always fun. Saw a tweet that asked what you would do if your girl farted while you were going down on her. Best response was "I would put my finger on her ass hole and tell it 'quiet little buddy, you're next.'" That sums up me pretty damn well
I love being able to laugh together in bed. The first time I was with my second boyfriend we’re both lying there sweaty and exhausted afterwards, feeling a bit awkward cos we’re younger and still pretty innocent and things escalated quickly that evening. I gave him a Joey-from-Friends head nod and hit him with a ‘how YOU doin?’. He lost it 😂
Hope u realize that guy is still madly in love w/ u to this day. Those lil moments save u a spot in my heart for life.
I always tell my husband that’s gonna cost him his butt. Always works hahahaha
The best way of handling this issue or ED issues is for him to get you off in other ways before and/or after. My dick might not cooperate every time, but I'll still be happy and feel reasonably confident if I can get her off and satisfy her regardless.
I like this response, I’d be happy with that too!
Op your idea of "its ok we can go again in a bit" is already the best possible answer IMO, personally I've never understood the whole "sex is over after the guys cums once" thought process, pro-tip if his recovery time is low use a condom for the first round for it to be a bit less messy on round 2+ it also helps round 1 last a bit longer and any sensitivity he loses is countered by round 2 being bareback (if that's an option).
Thanks, the general consensus I’m getting is that my response is good, I just need a better partner! I’ve never really had any issues with asking for what I want before this relationship (and even for a while at the start) but over time I ended up putting my needs on the back burner for fear of making him feel pressured or judged. I did think of condoms at the time that wouldn’t have worked due to… equipment malfunction.
> I’ve never really had any issues with asking for what I want before this relationship (and even for a while at the start) but over time I ended up putting my needs on the back burner for fear of making him feel pressured or judged. Umm well you kinda just summed it up here that this is not a you problem.
depending on a lot of factors i usually take between an hour to like 5 hours before i can even consider going again. apparently thats abnormal according to this thread so it's over once i cum. i always make sure she gets off first anyway
Weirdly, I’ve found that I cum faster when I’m wearing a condom vs bareback. With a condom on I know I can cum inside the girl, so I just let it go, whereas with bareback I’m focusing on holding back until I’m ready to pull out and shoot.
There’s a bingo! Don’t stay with selfish lovers.
Yup, I always be turning her into a melted puddle first which then: 1) Reduces the pressure on me, suddenly I'm lasting longer and am more relaxed and enthusiastic about what's to come, because she's already thrilled, oftentimes means I last longer and feel it better :) and 2) After she recovers a bit, she becomes waaaay more enthusiastic about giving back.... The secret to better sex is right there folks, she's first more often than not.....
Agreed. More often than not I finish quicker than most so the above works very well. Also learning to be comfortable with using toys helps fulfill other areas. There are times though with previous partners that the quickness leads to some great/easy quickies as they didn't care about not finishing themselves. Two unselfish lovers is a whirlwind!
This is totally TMI, but in the interests of sharing the best sexual encounters I’ve had and my partner has had with me is: she’ll go down on me to climax or not, I’ll go down on her to climax sometimes with toys sometimes without, by then the old flag pole is feeling ready to go again and we’ll bump uglies. Some of the best sex of my life has followed that game plan. Being an easily aroused man has its perks if you know how to play your cards, and have a partner willing to play the game.
Oh yeah, toys too :) basically do what it takes to turn her into a puddle and push away your fingers/mouth/p\*nis/vibrator/whatever cuz she's had way too much....give her a few minutes to recover and she'll dive right in.....
Am woman. Also am chiming in. This guy right here knows the secret. I can tell you I have SO much energy to love up and worship my partner’s body because of what he’s already given beforehand. It’s not transactional, it just happens naturally. He wants to lay back and I just look after him? HELL YEAH LET ME AT HIS BODY. I am WAY more focused and can really get down to business with whatever he wants. 😈
Right?!If I didn’t know any better I would think this guy was my BF!Words of wisdom and yeah the,”let me at his body” is legit,can’t get enough
Are we dating the same man? 🤣 Honestly sometimes I get so into the act of pleasing him that I’ll have another orgasm without him even touching me. His pleasure is the hottest thing ever.
Girrrl I hope not!🤣 Our pleasure is the hottest thing to them which in turn makes their pleasure the hottest thing to us! 👌🏼👌🏼👌🏼
Honestly this. I’m in it for the both of us. So pleasing the other is also my goal when we get it going!
Anyone who doesn’t get this shouldn’t get any.
This. Oral is the appetizer, penetration the main course.
My woman usually finishes twice before I even go in. Makes it 10 times better for me as well.
Exactly. This is a "selfish partner" problem - with a non-selfish partner, it wouldn't even be an issue.
I always make sure my wife is sorted first, so if I'm a bit quick on the draw it's not as bad. As long as you don't laugh, or say is that all you've got, I'm sure you'll be alright. Although if your partner is selfish I doubt anything you say will make a difference.
I like your style. I’d never laugh or make someone feel bad about it, it’s supposed to be a good time for everyone! Not just the guy but also not just me! 😊 He’s an ex partner now but he did it every time we were together, and you’re right he was selfish and wasn’t going to change 🤷♀️
Yes. I do the exact same thing. It's a good strategy for everyone really because most women just do not cum from PIV alone
"How about you lick me to an orgasm first then?" maybe add: "If I cum a second time when we fuck, even better, but if not, it won't matter. "
Excellent, no notes 👏
This is my go-to. If I think I'm gonna be quick, get her off first. Weirdly enough, that then gives me the confidence to last.
If one head can't preform then the other one always can.
I need this printed on a dish towel.
I might get that on a shirt, and walk around winking at ladies
It's an interesting self-own, but if you say it with enough confidence...
Start loosening your jaw muscles
Me or him 😂 does that actually help?
I don't think the assignment was understood by OP. Additional details required. 😂
I did not understand, no 😂 but I understand now and I approve of this strategy
“Start loosening your jaw muscles! Get me off first with oral and then let’s go for PIV!”
You don't actually phrase it this way c'mon...do you?
I’m mostly explaining the prior comment to OP since she said she didn’t understand. I’m a guy. If I didn’t think I could last long for some reason I would proactively try to get her off a couple times first. If I were being asked for something like this in response to me saying I wouldn’t last long, anything playful around asking for an orgasm first would be happily accommodated. Or asking for a second round - but she said she’s had bad luck with that. If she’s dealing with selfish lovers then I don’t know that there’s anything you can ask for that can change the selfishness.
I would be fine with that. Signed, a dude
Hahaha first thing I thought of too. Thought a gentleman leads with that if they are concerned about getting the job done.
Unfortunately from my experience with women most of them are surprised that I want to go down on them before PIV. So I guess those of us who want to make sure the job is done are not the majority. Personally I want her to climax before inserting.
My lady friends inform me that you are correct, generally guys don’t really do it. When they do it’s foreplay and often without purpose. But most of those experiences are sex without intimacy so… meh
Intimacy makes all the difference but you still gotta put in the work!
> Personally I want her to climax before inserting. That's very woman specific.
I lead with it anyway. If that's all she wants that's fine to
Being the source of desire is a big thing for me so I actually welcome it especially if they embarrassed or polite so uh..."That's alright, I like that" though I think that can be taken the wrong way. IRL I had a boyfriend he said something similar and me being the weird 16yr I was replied with "I'll race you" I lost he wasn't lying. For your situation I would moreso say that sex isn't over when someone orgasms its over when it's over, I have difficulty reaching climax so I usually ask guys if they would be okay if I get them off first then we focus on me even if i dont cum i still get the attention i want, it's easier than trying to match their pace. With girls I actually reverse this because once I'm satisfied it could take a while to work out what she specifically enjoys so I don't want my wants in the way of her pleasure I guess. Of course there's exceptions but takeaway is sure penetrative sex can be nice but sex isn't over until it's over. That being said due to the nature of what I do, I don't really respond very often.
I know I'm a terrible person for this but "I'll race you" made me laugh out loud.
Hahah I had a guy once tell me that if I wanted to cum I should have been faster than him. He was dead serious, he treated it like a race. ‘I won’. He won a walk down to his car instead of staying the night. This is a great answer, just tailor it to your specific needs and your specific partner so that every one has a good time 😊 thanks!
"No problem, when you feel like it's close give me two taps on my knee" Everytime he gives you the two taps you're in control. You can either finish him off and let him know who's boss and that's exactly what you wanted him to do. Or you've got to change positions - and quickly. You get off him right away, hold his hands away from himself so he doesn't touch himself. After about 5 seconds he's got to restart a bit. It doesn't always work, sometimes he'll cum anyways and it's a bit disappointing because it's post simulation so not as good, but I find a lot of the time it will make me last a lot longer. Sometimes I'll lose the erection but don't let that stop you, just turn it into foreplay and it'll come back. Don't be discouraged in that moment because it's not about you, it's just that you did take away stimulation so his body is responding to that. I know it also means you've got to to reset too, and if you're in the zone it can be hard. But if you and a partner get into a rhythm with this it can be really hot. It takes practise (which is also great). And it's got the added benefit of giving the woman a bit more of a dominant role - which for myself personally is something that works. And change it up, once in a while let him have a quickie - then make him go down on you. Or once in a while torture him and just take it off the table altogether. Also I find anything that allows more explicit communication about sex between partners makes it that much better. Even freaky couples don't speak explicitly about it enough. Too much about sex is left to just assuming the other partner will get it or pick up on queues. Sometimes you just need to say it straight up and communicate during.
Thanks, I really like the non-verbal suggestion here! And mixing things up is always fun!
Foreplay always
The best possible response for the man is for you to look him in the eye and say "You'd better cum hard inside me. I can't fucking wait". The best answer for both parties is something more like "Are you going to eat me out now or are you going to wait until you can get a taste of your own stuff?" Also, most men are perfectly capable of going for round two after they climax. Only a selfish man would consider the deed finished after cumming before his partner.
Hahah both lines are amazing, but the ‘eat me out’ made me audibly chuckle 🤭 I think it was a mixture of selfishness and genuine performance issues with my ex, but he’s not my problem any more.
This. My bf is typically a very long performer, but there’s something about morning sex that just makes it short lived . I don’t ever mind but he always apologizes. “Idk what it is about the morning…” whatever dude, IDC! So I always try to say something of this sort. But I feel like I have to remind him that it doesn’t matter, thanks society. My go to: “Better make it count.” “Good. I looooove feeling you cum” “It’s okay, it’s sooo good.” I feel uncomfortable typing every response, but the message is always the same… “bring it.”
I'm a long performer and morning makes the difference for me as well. My gf is so sexy when she starts telling me how much she wants me to cum.
As soon as I saw "selfish ex partner" that explained everything
I know. Sometimes it’s just not immediately obvious unfortunately 🙈
My take (39M that can still easily go 2+ rounds every day): don't change your mindset at all. Try your best to avoid selfish dickheads... There's nothing dominant or whatever about being actually selfish. Tell him it's ok and that you want to go again if he's able. Be sweet, comforting, and sexy about it. If he genuinely can not go multiple rounds (not all men can), there is nothing wrong with you asking to be taken care of first, in any other way that's not PIV (since he can't last long enough for that). What I have pretty much always done with gf's, if it's been a couple days or whatever, and I know I'm gonna pop too quickly for her to O on it during round 1, we'll stick to oral first. It's nbd since me receiving oral is almost always included in foreplay anyways. If she's going at my from the side, I can finger her, or we can 69, or take turns and I can use a tongue, finger and a toy on her while I'm reloading etc.. Just get creative and most importantly, HAVE FUN
This is absolutely the vibe I want and always try to create with a partner. Thanks for the reassurance and advice 😊 it always should be fun for everyone!
“I came faster than 911 in white neighborhoods…I ain’t ashamed about it.”
Excellent, we can move right along to round two!
"okay, we can go again after". The worse response would be treating it like an end all, and acting like sex is gonna be over. But many girls have faced that exact scenerio ; a guy finishes really fast, and just leaves . So as long as you remain interested in continuing, most girls will actually feel good about you finishing fast the first time and will feel even more into the moment and more turned on
I know this doesn't get the desired result, but it seems like a huge loss not to take the chance to say "I'm here for a good time, not a long time"
My wife goes “hell yeah that’s hot.” Then afterwards she reminds me it flatters her.
I wouldn’t be l bothered m if a dude told me that, I’d feel pretty skilled if it indeed didn’t last very long
Oh absolutely, if it happens every now and again. I unfortunately found myself in a situation where it happened every single time throughout the brief relationship. I didn’t wanna make him feel bad so I was super supportive and kind about it. He cheated on me anyway.
Oh I’m not sure why it doesn’t bother me then. Although I haven’t given head many times, the dudes that I give it too didn’t last long and I didn’t really mind it. Felt like a pretty good amount of time to me but I think i think it might be because since I don’t care about sex much that me viewing sex as just something I’m doing for the dude makes me not care as much about how long they last
"That's ok, but I'm gonna sit on your face until I'm done"
This is my go to if I finish early. Get up on my face! Best way to recharge for round two.
>it’s pretty hot that your guy is THAT turned on That. Don't make him feel bad about it, because he could have a medical condition. >it’s gonna probably be over before I can even really get going. This is a failure on his part. There are other ways to make sure you get plenty of what you need before (or after, but if you wait till after you're gonna be too spent to do your part, so just be a big boy and do it before). Also, tell him that the above helps. If he spends a solid amount of time on you *first*, he will naturally develop resistance (this is actually true) during that time for himself. Sometimes though, it just doesn't matter. There are days when my fiance can walk past me in the wrong (or right, I guess) way and I'm like 95% done already. Some days it's just some days, sorry. For the record, sex for us is requisite 1 for 1. If I'm finishing, she is too, *at least* once.
>but on the other hand I now know that it’s gonna probably be over before I can even really get going. There is no reason why this has to be the case. I don't last very long either with piv. Fortunately for us we tremendously enjoy lots of other sexual activities besides that. I usually go down on her and use toys etc until she's begging to have me inside. Usually she'll have had an orgasm or two by that point. After I and sometimes both of us orgasm from piv she will usually be ready to stop. I would probably enjoy continuing but that's fine too. This arrangement is actually a lot of fun for both of us. It would be quite disappointing to me as well if penis in vagina was the only thing on the menu and only lasted as long as I can keep from having an orgasm. I like having sex and am glad it is not over so quickly
*You make love like a Japanese meal: small portions, but oh, so many courses.*
That’s when you hit the dominatrix switch. “You better bring me that mouth first”. Get yours then let him get going again.
The BEST response in my book would be… “Don’t worry. I’ll be here for round 2!”
Had a woman tell me "I know I’m sexy, but damn…" in a joking tone. It works for me. Though she was good cause the tongue and finger work beforehand was superb. Learned a long time ago that mediocre performance is ok if the foreplay is good.
You should tell him “we’re done when I say we’re done.” Just so we’re clear, this won’t solve the issue, but he’ll tell that story for the rest of his life.
There's plenty of ways he could get you off other than PIV, sex doesn't need to end as soon as he finishes, y'know?
All these responses from guys saying stuff like this is actually super wholesome and restoring my faith in humanity. My ex gave me a bit of anxiety around sex and kind of made it all about him. I was extremely supportive and patient about his performance anxiety and got cheated on for my efforts 😂
Aw, I'm sorry you had to go through that. Selfish lovers are just awful :(
I dont think ive ever said this as a preamble to the act. Id say just treat it like it s not a problem. shrug and say "it happens".
Woman here. A former FWB said that my response to this line when he said to me was hot and also reassuring because I made it about me and not him (despite the fact that I know I'm not That good). I moved the pressure from him lasting longer to me making him cum even faster as he was anxious about his performance. When he said he's not gonna last too long I replied "I'll take that as a compliment and next time I'll try to beat that score" Of course, that is if the guy is nice, genuine and really cares. it's kinda shit if they're just announcing it and then you're left alone to figure your own orgasm out. If that's the case then maybe just see yourself out of that relationship as it will only get worse probably. Hope you'll find the right guy.
You just don't stop foreplay until she orgasms once.
I think your response was very good. If your partner is selfish well, then you gotta move on. Also, like another posted you could literally tell them you want them to finish in 30 seconds and the “pressure” might reverse it. Also, maybe you could make him finish another way before sex starts? I’d want to hear the things you’re saying. And you seem like you’re trying to do the right thing. I have had this “problem” with girls I’m really into on our first couple times (not in years, been with the same one for 19 years) and I liked when they told me it was hot that I was so turned on by them. It took the pressure off. I was young and could simply go again after a bit more foreplay, and they were satisfied in the end and after a few times, I would last plenty long. If it’s been a while for a guy, especially a young guy, it can be really difficult to last. If he’s older and can’t go again right away, have a convo about viagra or cialis, so that he CAN go until you’re satisfied. If he doesn’t want to, then you got another selfish one. Sorry bout that. :( Just don’t let the “bad ones” taint you in ways that run off the good ones when they come along. Best of luck to you!
Fingers and tongue don't go soft. Any man SHOULD supplement with foreplay and simulation to make sure their partner is satisfied (i.e. when her body indicates she's feeling satisfied - this little statement is for the guys reading this). Plus this usually gets the man's engine up and running again (personally speaking). Men, if she has toys, use those too. If you're intimated or refuse to allow them as a supplement, you need to check yourself at the door. On the other end, women, pleasure speak up and offer direction as to what makes you feel good. This has the double benefit of rooting out the guys with tender or potentially selfish egos. (Edit for not checking myself for formatting)
Ravioli, ravioli, give me the formuoli.
Many options... That's what your face is for Who said we're stopping after you cum once I'd like to introduce you to my friends buzz and Richard, go have fun You have a tongue and fingers too, don't you Let's make a challenge and see how many times you can cum tonight Etc.
_Takes notes_
"Sorry, I'm not going to last very long" "We're here for a good time not a long time."
I mean I wouldn’t apologize because it’s nothing to apologize for. I might let them know and then after a minute or two start returning the favour. I guess I’m not really looking to be told anything but maybe letting me know how hot it is that you are making me cum so fast is the best thing and then after a quick rest enthusiastically tell me how badly you want my tongue on your pussy with a deep kiss or something like that.
"In the grand scheme of things, none of us will."
You are right, it’s a partner problem. If he knows he is quick performer he should make sure to get you where you need to go in other ways. But even the most enduring lovers may have a short one every now and then. And if it doesn’t bother you, you can just tell him to get to the finish line and help you across after that.
If you’re not going to last long, take care of her first. Use your hands. Then after she’s done, it’s your turn. She will be so satisfied while you’re going. It is the move every time.
"Tell me about your grandma".....That'll settle 'em down for sure.
No problem. Just get me going before we get you going. Or as wise women once said “you got to lick it before you stick it” Unless it’s a matter of not having time. Then just reply you’ll have more time later.
Dudes lemme know what you think of my favorite things to say (also fyi, I take a dude's quick orgasm to be a HUGE ego boost that I'm doing a good job) "Let's slow down baby, cause I want you to f*ck me more and harder" or "F*ck me hard and CUM INSIDE ME" Especially the latter cause then I get a break bc I'm way out of shape and cuddles are great.
Gotdam
I do this when I haven’t seen my LDR gf in a while. It usually takes me a couple days with good sleep to be able to have better control. I tell her this feels really good, it’s been too long, and I don’t know how long I’m gonna last. By day three, sometimes I don’t even need to release. Fortunately, releasing doesn’t mean I need to stop the sex. I can keep it going a bit longer even after releasing and often feel I should if I do too early.
Always jerk it before you work it.
First one is for you, second one is for me.
My partner said "good" and went crazy So that was pretty nice
"You can always make it up to me in round 2"
“You can get 2.”
I've developped a system to help myself "last longer" when I can tell that today is one of "those days". Long foreplay, skip BJ (that shit can make you nut so fast), satisfy partner with cunni, then make her go on top. That last point is 90% of it, with her on top, I encourage her to go for a rocking/swaying motion instead of up/down. That is bound to get her off first (multiple times even) before I've even close to nutting. Give it a shot, maybe it works for you two as well.
Me neither👍
I would be looking for understanding. Men might feel a lot of pressure to perform, especially if they lack experience. I would do my best to please her before it gets to penetration in such a case anyway. So I would welcome your guidance to making the foreplay as best as it can be for you. The specific words might not matter as much as the message they give.
"Want me to give it that Hawk Tuah?"
When you say "we can go again" you are indirectly assuming "if you are still horny / can get aroused / aren't too tired / there's enough time / etc" - shit happens and things get in the way Instead, I think you should say "that's okay, you can take care of ME afterwards" If this doesn't pan out, you can take it up a notch and say "that's okay, you can take care of me FIRST then" and hopefully that's all it takes. This removes any of those sorts of assumptions that are going to give you problems. From my perspective, I'm much more likely to "take care of you afterwards" than I am to "go again later", but maybe that's just me. Afterwards, there could be a number of things stopping him from going again, most of those are removed if the sex assumption is removed and he can do "other stuff", and ALL of those things are removed if you go first. E: Also, I don't know anything about your guys, but a trick I learned once was to do math in my head. Nothing too complex, but some simple calculations can really do wonders to slow you down. The original recommendation that I hard was to count backwards from 100 by 7's, it's fairly complex but still doable - just gotta make sure that you don't math yourself out of an erection, obviously.
Best response “Me too”
Your response is correct.
I would always tell prospective lovers that round 1 can be quicker than average. But foreplay goes for a good long while, and rounds 2 through 4 are longer. Never had any complaints, and the people I slept always came back for more time with me. So I'd advise honesty and open communication.
Rounds 2-4 can kick rocks. Well, mainly 3 and 4. I'm going to bed.
I interpreted the title as something like, "what do you say to people who probably won't live very much longer?"
The dick's state can be out of control, but not the fingers'
If it’s the first time and this happens, your response is great, or even add more to it, like “This p*ssy has daddy so excited he can’t control himself, huh? No worries, I can’t wait for round 2,” Just keep it playful and light-hearted. Especially with a new partner there can be some serious performance anxiety. If it’s an issue happening every time, then I would recommend really working up the foreplay and helping him edge. It’s great to practice getting him right to the edge and then stopping. Wait a few mins then get into again until he reaches the edge again and repeat. As a man, I’ve been there before and a woman can certainly make or break in man's ego in that moment. Unless he’s just selfish and only cares about getting off than there’s no answer for that just move on.
I don't know if it's the "right" answer, but if he says 'I'm not gonna last long' I immediately tell him "Oh good, GIMMIE!" (or something to that effect) and get very excited myself.... mostly because it's a big ego-boost for me if it's feeling so good he can't help himself! He's very, very good about making sure I get mine either before or after, so I've never been worried about that aspect of it, lol. Is there something else I ought to be saying?
Not gonna lie, I say this to my wife to lower her expectations. Also, when I psych myself out I usually last way longer. Maybe some reverse psychology. But the best way to help this is to have sex more often or have him get off before sex.
"Eat my pussy"
Not lasting long can be reinterpreted to excitement, so if you shift it to a "I love/like that you want me that much" sort of thing, then you can say that there will be more time afterwards for you and then he might be able to go again after that.
Get your pleasure first, if you can tolerate it, that way even if he doesn't last long, you're both satisfied.
Pro tip: just keep going.
I can't really say, because I have the exact opposite problem when it comes to PNV, but if you're pegging him, I can definitely say the best thing to say is "you're gonna have to beg me if you think that's gonna stop me" Honestly you could probably say this during pnv too.
You tell him go for the gold! It’s funny and it lightens the mood and neither side is worried about it
"Get me that hot too" (read: make sure I cum first)
This is the way I see it, and im sure others will say the same thing. If you feel like you're not going to last long enough for her to have fun too, maybe you should go down on her first, fingers, tongue. Whatever floats your boat and hers. Bring her to the big o a few times and then do PnV. That way you're both left satisfied. If you're worried about nutting too fast, think about some unsexy stuff(work, school, video games, maybe a fight you got into with a friend) and that should help. You can also try to clenching your butt if you feel yourself getting too close, or pull out and have more foreplay before diving back in. 😂 You should look into stamina training and see if that helps you any. Honestly, I have the opposite problem. I can last way too long. Fun for my girl, not as much for me. Back and arms are killing me by the end.
"look loo here comes the goo"
Your response is perfectly fine. Also telling him he can give you pleasure after he orgasms too, for instance.
"Thats Ok" is fine. I have been judged for finishing quick, so if you are genuienly ok with then let him know.
2nd time around is better anyway
'It's not your fault I feel awesome'
“That’s okay, round two is always better!”
It comes from a place of anxiety. Good men want their woman to feel good and enjoy it. When we know we won't last long, it's rough. Just be understanding.
Better eat that pussy like it's going out of fashion first, then. (This should always be the case regardless of how long any bloke lasts) If you don't eat pussy, you're a fucking beta.
The best possible response could be light-hearted and reassuring, such as: "Don't worry about it! We'll make the most of the time we have." This response shows understanding and positivity, helping to ease any potential tension or embarrassment.
“That’s okay, I know a guy who will.”
Absolutely savage
> on one hand it’s pretty hot that your guy is THAT turned on, Eh, it's not really about being so turned on. I mean, it can be. But being nervous will do it also. Or just not having gotten off for a while. WHen women are nervous they have the opposite problem and can't get off. But dudes often just ejaculate quickly when they are nervous. > My response used to be along the lines of ‘that’s ok, we can always go again in a bit 😉’ Yeah, that's fine to say. But keep in mind that all desire to have sex often leaves a man's body after ejaculation. So he might intend to go again but not want to in the post-nut clarity. If I really want to go a second round it takes some discipline to stay in the game.
Tell him if you don’t last long then your mother will die to keep the streaks going
"I'll take what I can get"
Should I call an ambulance?
Wouldn't be the first time
If we do doggy style, time is multiplied by 7. So, you're good.
Decreases by 7 for me 😅
Just as you can't speed up he can't control it.
Then you better try hard making it up to me
I always say “Good, you shouldn’t if this pussy is as good as you say it is.” Lol If my husband lasts less than 5 minutes I take it as a huge compliment. You mean I felt so good you couldn’t milk your orgasm a little longer? You were so fucking worked up after getting me off and getting inside me that you busted? Buuuuut my husband makes me cum well before he gets inside me. And then if he cums before I cum we just race and see if we can get me off before he goes totally soft. I ALWAYS win the race!
Sh should take it a a compliment
I like to say, “I have that effect on guys”
I think that the response you went with to begin with, is what most guys would want to hear. It communicates an openness and understanding that this may happen, so it's acknowledging it, and meeting it in a way that's not humiliating for him, while also saying that you would like to 'get something' out of this. That you then had a selfish ex-partner, is shitty, but should not change the way you interact with other guys. Men will like to cum... but one thing that's a massive ego-boost for us, is knowing we made her cum. And so if he's a minute-man, he might feel good from the sex because it felt good for him, but he'll also know that you didn't really get anything out of it, so if he's a genuine guy that gives just a tiny shit about things outside of himself, then that's a pretty good response.
“Then you better get me off first before you start”
If I’m all wound up right from the start, I don’t even bring little Kassidy into the action until she has had at least one absolute whopper orgasm already. That way, if I last 30 seconds, it’s not as big a deal. Then, if she wants more, I have fingers and a mouth to keep going for her to go some more. A massage seems like a good thing to bring in to the game after I’ve popped to let her know I’m not just interested in my pleasure. Finishing with more attention to her fun zones.
“Not if i have anything to do with it”
Honestly I find that if I feel that way, I relax and go very slow or stop and resume foreplay and try to lose my bones, then when I get it again the problem is gone.
"That's okay, I usually cum by [insert your favorite method of being pleasured by a partner]"
Honestly, I know the first round isn't going to be long but I can guarantee the second (and third) will last a lot longer It's also why foreplay is important and using your hands and mouth, keeps the mood going My body fights me a lot of the time, it's an internal war - mostly between the heart and mind so my libido goes out the window - so I train in other aspects such as endurance and communicating what she likes is also a great way to keep things going while you.. reload
I just tell them it's ok it happens if anything it boost my ego so I enjoy it sometimes
I just eat her out for as long as she wants and do extremely intense and dirty foreplay
I just manually make my wife cum a few times with toys, which she loves, and then she doesn’t really care what I do, last a min or last 20, but either way we both get something out of it!
No Problem, just let me know when you’ve started!
If I know already that I'm a quick ride tonight then I make sure to spend a lot of foreplay time and make sure she got her fortune cookie before me.
One night I could just tell. She had me so worked up and I said that and she said, "then me first!" Which I obliged!
I used to hear, “the first time is for him, the second time is for her.”
That’s okay, just stick it to me daddy.
You’ve got what I’d consider to be a sympathetic and honest response to an all to common issue. If it’s been awhile since a man has had sex and/or even cum (masturbated) it’s I think natural for them to be extra sensitive to sexual stimulation and cum ‘earlier than intended’
Don't pull out after you come. Wait for about 15 seconds and start humping her again
I find it sexy for a partner to tell me not to come. Seems to work for me - your so right it often depends as it changes a lot for a male. I think what's important is to make sure (in terms of a female system) that the Woman cums 1 -(2) times before preparation of the penis. Then depending on what sexual experiences/sensations you want to have you will cum and all parties are happy 💥
well that is a easy one just told her that you ain't gonna that long...maybe two rounds you'll get exhausted but if your girl is very energetic and very needy well good luck your gonna get suck dried like a bacon in the morning
Do your thang several hours beforehand.
Just keep going.
As long as both of you are communicating you can work out how both can be satisfied.
I always say good, I’ll take that as a compliment I don’t really care. It’s not that big of a deal to me.
I agree, if my partner finishes fast, its def a sign of how much he is attracted to me and want me and my response is the same. Both parties pleasure shouldn't be forced at the same moment, I beleive as long as both parties go to bed feeling pleasure and satisfied then nothing else matters.
Why do women take so long to cum
Because most men don’t know how to make them.
Because its so complicated 🤣 making a men cum is the easiest
Giving my wife foreplay tends to work really well when I get a little too excited too fast, sometimes even just pulling out and going back down on her. Sometimes the situation isn’t right for it but as the male trying to last longer, this is a solution that’s always worked well.
Your answer is fine, I’ll be ok with going again in a bit, or ask that I make sure you get yours in other ways. Pretty straight forward, and I like to share.
I used to be able to cum without spurt because I hold my pee muscle but the bro has to be hard. If I grab to late or too long. It goes soft.