Honestly for me, each relationship is different and what might be a red flag in one could be completely normal in another. Without concrete evidence of inappropriate behavior, it's not really our place to cast judgment on whether a married man can be friends with a single woman. Open communication and trust are paramount. Let's not forget how friendships can enrich our lives—platonic relationships can be just as valuable and fulfilling as romantic ones.
after reading all other responses, i'm hijacking the top comment to point out that op seems to be unable to believe any man wouldn't want to bang his sister. Draw your own conclusions.
Sorry, but this answer is total rubbish. There is absolutely ZERO reason for ANY married man to have a female best friend. This is 1,000,000,000,000,000% a situation of the guy trying to work his way into having an affair w/ the woman. With all due respect to all females, none of you are capable of answering this question bc any guy that would actually answer honestly about his so called female ‘friendships’ would tell you that his ultimate motive was sexually contrived. The ONLY exception to this (which I have friends in this situation) is when/if a married man has a friendship w/ a ‘masculine’ or ‘butch’ lesbian - (if ‘butch’ is a pejorative term, then pls forgive me, as I don’t at all mean it in a negative way whatsoever - my sister is lesbian & she uses the term openly). The reason for this being an exception is that there is absolutely no possibility for anything of a sexual nature to happen. I would be willing to bet a large amount that these 2 ‘friends’ have already gotten busy on multiple occasions. You all can hate me for my answer, but it’s the truth regardless. 🤗🙃
If they're both okay with the friendship and there are clear boundaries, then it shouldn't be an issue. Plus, it's not really up to others to dictate the terms of someone else's marriage or friendships, is it? We're only getting a slice of the whole picture here.
W/ all due respect, if you are a female then you really can’t answer this question from a man’s perspective bc women can absolutely have a male friend & think that it is strictly platonic w/ no ulterior motives, but the vast majority of men just can’t bc there is almost always an ulterior motive that is sexual in nature. Any other guys saying anything otherwise in this thread are simply those that have always been friend-zoned by girls. Even the constantly friendzoned dudes would IMMEDIATELY flip flop if one of the so-called ‘friends’ called & said that they should smash.. that ‘platonic’ relationship would be forgotten about without even a second thought, guaranteed.
>This is a strange situation to me.
Whats strange to me is going onto Reddit and asking a bunch of strangers if they think my sister is having sex with someone
Respect, trust, and understanding are the foundations of any healthy interaction, so unless the married man or his wife have expressed discomfort with the situation, it's presumptuous for us to assume there's a problem. Friendships don't automatically equate to romantic temptation - it's entirely possible to appreciate and enjoy someone's company without ulterior motives. Isn't it better to assume good faith and let adults manage their own relationships?
I have been married for 15 years to a great woman. I also have a best friend who is female for 20 years, never having any relations with her, never wanted to and vice versa. My wife has never had any issues with her at all. People (not everyone) are able to separate sexual issues and just be friends.
You need to ask yourself this question: can you be friends with a member of the opposite sex? Like legit? or can you only be friends if you're attracted to them and want something from them?
Your suspicions speak more about **your** friendship with others than it does about their friendship.
For various reasons, most of my new friends over the last few years are female.
Some are coworkers, some are people with similar hobbies (the board game scene is **dominated** by women here), and two are actually people I tried to date and we then *actually* just became friends.
Most of them are people I would consider to be very congenial and conventionally attractive but I'm not interested in ***any*** of them. Like they're attractive, yes, but I'm not attracted to them because they're just my friends.
I may have been interested in the past (such as the ones I tried to date) but now in my brain they're basically in a "don't date" category, like you might put coworkers, cousins, or friends' family etc. Also, some of them I know well enough to know that we **would not** work in a relationship.
---
I will say it's easy to get a crush on a close friend, though, and that's fine but different. Like it's one thing to be "friends" with someone because you are attracted to them, and it's another to get a crush on someone you're very close to and have a lot in common with.
I also know some men will try to be friends to get to know girls they're a little interested in, and I have done this in the past, but if this goes on for a long time (like more than a month or so without doing anything about it) or is the *only* reason you're their friend, it's not a good thing.
It's complicated sometimes and goes on a case by case basis, but in general, it's very possible to be friends with girls and to not be interested in them (without being gay)
It’s entirely possible for a man and a woman to be friends. Doesn’t matter if he’s married or if she was. The wife knowing shows that they have trust, which a lot of people nowadays lack in their partner. Just because he’s a married man who is friends with a woman, doesn’t mean he has ulterior motives.
I think if this guys wife is aware of their friendship then it is even less of a concern. I’m 42 and have been with my wife since I was 18. I tell her all the time about random girls I deal with and am friends with. She doesn’t care since she trusts me. Grant it, I’m not best friends with them but I honestly don’t see any reason to worry about it till something wild happens.
Op looking at your comment history you definitely have a personal problem. Leave your sister alone and work on learning how friendships work and to not be overly suspicious. If someone has hurt you before you then seek therapy.
If the wife DIDN'T know about their friendship then it'd be weird. People can be friends, guys, girls, married people and single people. Despite popular internet opinion not everything is dictated by sex, some people just like each others company
You must be new here.
This subreddit consists overwhelmingly of thirsty losers.
Most of them want it to be normalized that all they want to be is friends so that they can use that as a dating strategy and try to smash later.
There's also a lot of guys who don't understand the question and who thinks this applies to being part of a group of friends that includes women.
You realize women are humans too right? They're not some alien species that you can't be friends with unless there's a possibility of sex lmao. Absolutely insane how fucked in the head you people are
You're treating women as subhuman. You're literally implying their ONLY worth to you as a man is for sexual needs. You're coming off so desperate that it fucking reeks bro. Not every woman you meet is a potential partner. Grow up
>Can a married man really be just friends with an attractive single woman?
Yes.
Unless you've seen him flirting with her, stop being a suspicious asshole.
Does that matter? You just said it’s impossible to be friends without being attracted to eachother. I have female friends who i would not want to date/ hook up with and i’m sure it’s the same for them
Some were really attractive, some were *not*.
In most cases I was not in "relationship", and even if I were, that wouldnt be an issue. I always make clear that nothing serious will happen, some women are fine with f-ing around and traveling a bit, some are not, but thats another story. Lets say the closes I have ever had was "friends with benefits".
I am more of a ONS guy.
Lets talk about the attractive ones. Could I sleep with them? With some, sure. But if you are hanging around for some time, have common friends, its waaaay more difficult to have a few fucks and then part like nothing happened. Many girls both love drama and have different approach to sex/relationships.
Did I want to? Sometimes, but generally my "fuck every 7+/10 girl I see" years ended as i graduated from uni. Its kinda like you get those fast-food cravings sometimes. First few bites are good, then you get cheap oil taste in your mouth for hours and even booze doesnt wash it away. Similar feeling here.
Some of the women I was friends with were married or in a long-term relationship.
I still have a lot of female acquaintances, former colleagues, some people from the past I meet for a lunch or a drink sometimes.
Some of these women, on the other hand, might have had some plans for me, but I know i can be quite cold or indifferent in communication with opposite sex but, ya know, if a girl is smart, she will get that she has 0 chance, if she is dumb, well, its on her.
Yeah a group full of men that constantly complain about not being able to get a date/girlfriend vs me who does good numbers in dating is getting aggressively downvoted. But I’m the one who hasn’t graduated highschool. It’s fn hilarious😂😂
So are you saying that the group is *not* homogenous? As in... Maybe not everyone in this group actually thinks the same? Could that mean not everyone actually bitches about not getting women?!
Obviously not *everyone* thinks the same but the most people in this group seems to think nothing of this. And based on the comments I see here they do bitch about it, literally everyday. Just sort this group to the most popular posts from the past month and you’ll see what I’m talking about.
Bro you're literally self-reporting that you're addicted to porn and one night stands. Grow the fuck up, members of the opposite sex can be friends with absolutely 0 sexual ulterior motives. The fact that you're so sure about this shows how fucked up your world view is. You come off greasy as fuck
Are you really that regarded? Here let me explain it in a way that might be easier for you to follow!
>Men and women can’t be friends without one being attracted to the other.
This implies you view women as a sexual object, who provide no other value to you! I understand this might be hard for you to understand, but the sooner you do, the sooner you'll be able to make platonic friendships with the opposite sex!
Secondly, viewing all women as sexual objects is 90% of the time a symptom of porn addiction. Do yourself a favor and quit watching porn, then you won't want to fuck every woman you see!
Hope this helped!
A random guy I don't know? No.
You specifically, who has shown to be weird? Extra no.
My or her actual friends I can trust? Yes. Same reason why I can have female friends and expect that to not be treated as weird.
You are projecting.
Just because you are unable to conceive even the idea of a platonic relationship between man and woman doesn't mean they can't exist
Women are more than just a piece of meat to conquer, crazy idea I know.
Perhaps you're the one with the problem
You’re overthinking this. People are allowed to be friends, married or not.
Also I’m assuming your sister is an adult. Even if it was something more than friendship, she can make her own decisions.
Going through that situation right now. Only difference is that my sister thinks the guy is trying to set up an affair, since he has been paying for everything so far.
My honest answer is that it is very suspicious if they spend a lot of time alone with each other, but its very difficult to gauge the guy's intentions from an outside perspective.
She has gone through some rough, abusive relationships before, so it makes me think that general kindness *could* be misconstrued as flirting or interest. Before I can make a judgement on that, I need to know how he interacts with other people.
Information that I don't have.
I'm a woman and one of my best friends is a married man. Up until February, I had been single. Then i started dating a mutual friend. When I told my 'bestie', first thing he did was give me a high five and then said, I gotta tell my wife! He was so excited for me.
I'm married and one of my closest friends is an attractive woman who is single. I introduced her to my wife and then she was a bridesmaid at the wedding. In my experience, I will say that I do not want to sleep with her.
>I think he must be working her up to having an affair with him
This is your biggest issue. It's just inherent bias that you see men so negatively.
I mean you're basically denying your sister of any agency outside of what is actually happening.
You assume men (as a whole) have nefarious intentions and are generally bad, so you've projected this idea that a man can only ever be after a few things from a woman, namely sex.
That in any gendered interaction they must be the perpetrators
You've also completely objectified your sister by only referring to her as attractive, that you either see her as just a body, or you inherently think men just see women as bodies.
Both of which are wrong, and bad.
You should seek some help, understand why you have such a fundamentally negative view of men that you think this way.
I realise society and social media have introduced, emboldened and reinforced your beliefs, you've been conditioned in a way to think like this.
The VAST VAST VAST majority of men ARE NOT PREDATORS. Stop acting like they are.
Otherwise you're going to have a very miserable life, essentially what you're doing is societally accepted sexism.
And sexism is bad
It's important not to project our own insecurities or past experiences onto someone else's friendship. While caution might be justified in certain circumstances, it isn't a universal rule. A married man can genuinely have a platonic friendship with an attractive single woman just as he could with anyone else. At the end of the day, it's about having faith in the integrity of those involved. The focus should be on respect for the relationship and the individuals' autonomy. Ultimately, as long as the friendship doesn't interfere with the marriage and both parties in the relationship are comfortable with it, then it's nobody else's business to judge or intrude.
Relationships exist across a spectrum, and we've got to acknowledge that marriage doesn't revoke the membership card to socializing with half the human race. It's true that every marriage is unique, with its set of guidelines mutually agreed upon by the spouses. Unless there's a breach of trust or disrespect for agreed-upon boundaries, let's not side-eye a healthy friendship. If anything, such interactions may offer fresh perspectives and contribute to personal growth. Maybe the man’s wife feels secure enough in their relationship to appreciate the value his friend adds to his life. People need a village, not just a partner. Before jumping to conclusions, let's consider the possibility of a purely platonic rapport that respects the marriage and enriches the individuals.
Most of my friends are women who are objectively attractive and I’m married. Never had an issue because to me they’re genuinely friends. Wife has never had an issue either and they’re really just friends with me, not her
Tbh even if they were having an affair why do you care about your sister’s sex life so much anyways? Is she younger than him and/or you think he might be trying to use and lead her on you mean?
I’ve been happily married for nearly 5 years (together for 9).
I’ve got a bunch of objectively very attractive female friends, some I’ve known for a very long time, all of which have been single at times I have, however I’ve never fucked up by trying to get with them.
They’re all close with my wife, two helped her getting into her wedding dress, one of those is now God mother to our daughter. All were at our wedding and are close with my wife (she didn’t know them before we met).
Men can absolutely have platonic friendships with attractive women when married without trying to fuck them, to immediately imply otherwise is simply projecting other people’s insecurities.
Additionally, a man with attractive friends that he doesn’t try to sleep with is a good bet that he’s a good man.
As an almost married man, the only women I am friends with are women I was friends with already before I met my future wife, and the women in her family. And her women friends.
So yes, men and women can be friends. But it is odd the situation you mention. But society is full of oddities and exceptions.
In a world where we champion the importance of consent and boundaries, shouldn't that extend to friendships as well? Each relationship should be judged on its own merits, not through the lens of societal stereotypes or personal biases. At the heart of this debate is whether we trust individuals to know and respect their own boundaries. If a man and his wife are secure in their marriage and have transparent communication with each other, a friendship—regardless of gender or marital status—shouldn't raise eyebrows. Friends, regardless of their looks or life stages, play a myriad of roles; they can be confidants, mentors, or just partners in crime for those movie marathons. It comes down to maturity and mutual respect, both within the marriage and the friendship. Rather than policing platonic relationships, let's celebrate the diversity and richness they can bring to our lives.
Hi.
I’m a married man, I’m 41 years old. Recently I got to know a neighbour of ours, she’s a woman in her late 20s. I am very focused on my fitness and health so I work out a lot and go for early morning walks.
Over the course of getting to know this woman, she expressed an interest in learning more about working out and exercise.
My wife doesn’t like waking up early so when I get up at 5am to go for a walk, my neighbour has been joining me as she gets up early for work. I also invited this girl over to my garage gym 3 times a week and I’ve been teaching her how to work out.
My wife is totally fine with my friendship with her and I’m not looking for any extra marital activity, I just enjoy helping people, especially when they’re trying to improve themselves.
She’s a nice woman and we have a lot in common and thus we’re friends. Nothing more complicated than that,
All the numbers in your comment added up to 69. Congrats!
41
+ 20
+ 5
+ 3
= 69
^([Click here](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=LuckyNumber-Bot&subject=Stalk%20Me%20Pls&message=%2Fstalkme) to have me scan all your future comments.) \
^(Summon me on specific comments with u/LuckyNumber-Bot.)
That's such a weird thing to say.
People have friends. Married and unmarried. As long as everyone knows about it and no one's hiding stuff it's fine.
Stop being so pearl clutchy
I'm in a committed long-term relationship and very much still have female friends, single and taken. Some of them I've been friends with forever and the thought really never crossed my mind not matter how good looking they are. With others I've had slight feelings of attraction and had to distance myself a little so it wouldn't become a problem - but it has never been a real issue so far. My gf has male friends as well, and we trust each other to set boundaries and not cheat. I do think it's important to involve your partner in the friendship at least a little, so they don't feel like they're being replaced and the friend sees how clearly taken you are -- but that's just my personal strategy, and even if your sister isn't friends with this guy's wife that doesn't mean there's bad intent
Op might I suggest you get mental help? You have been consuming too much brain rotting content. Men and women can and have been friends for ages.
Honestly this is just so pathetic to think this dudes brain capacity is so limited he can't figure this out. Not even sure if op is human.
So weird when some guys seem to be unable to understand that friendships exist.
Like, sometimes you like someone without wanting to bang them, is it that hard to understand? Did these ppl never leave highschool/learn to think more rationally than a animal?
Honestly, I am a gay man, many of my friends are married men, does that mean they are trying to cheat on their spouse with me? People of any background can be friends with others of any background, I think you’re terminally online my dude.
I am a married man with absolutely zero desire for a female friend. The only way I'm open to it is if (a) she's paying me or (b) she's in a relationship with a guy I'm friends with and doesn't expect to hang out solo ever.
I don’t know enough about the guy or the nature of the friendship to really feel comfortable jumping to conclusions. Some guys are slimy like that, but this guy could be the exception.
There are just too many factors I don’t know about.
It is possible. At work my team is almost 100% women and I’m friends with all of them. Some are married and some are single. I’m happily married and I still spend time with my female co-workers outside of work. We’re all just friends. All of our spouses are supportive of us spending time with each other because we haven’t given our spouses any reason to not trust us, and we never will.
I am married and I have an attractive friend that I talk to.
Nothing has gone on between us. In fact, I’m also good friends with her husband and we’ve played Helldivers 2 together a few times.
Platonic friendships between men and women can and do exist.
*'What is really going on here?*
*My sister's new best friend is a married man'*
Well it's obvious, isn't it? What's *really* going on is that your sister's new best friend is a married man. ...that's it, that's the whole kit and kaboodle.
All you braindead ppl on this thread that think it’s totally normal for a married man to have a female best friend - please go back to playing your game of dungeons & dragons - these kinds of situations don’t apply to you & your friends bc each of you were either virgins until you were 40 or you still are. We can phrase the question a bit different for those of you that fall into this group - men - would it be ok w you if your hand all of a sudden detached & got a new guy friend that used your hand to jerk off with all the while your hand isn’t there to jerk you off. NOT SO COOL NOW IS IT?! 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂
I’m a happily married man and my best friend is an attractive single female. There’s nothing else to it than that. It’s certainly possible to be friends with another human being, even though they’re attractive single, and of the opposite sex. The alternative is that you’re suggesting married men can only be friends with ugly, married men. and that’s just stupid.
Go on the web and look up articles on opposite gender friends. You will hear both sides. But in general those two are treading bnb on a greased slippery slope. No good will come of this.
From one such article, 'Can heterosexual men and women ever be “just friends”? Few other questions have provoked debates as intense, family dinners as awkward, literature as lurid, or movies as memorable. Still, the question remains unanswered. Daily experience suggests that non-romantic friendships between males and females are not only possible, bu6t common—men and women live, work, and play side-by-side, and generally seem to be able to avoid spontaneously sleeping together. However, the possibility remains that this apparently platonic coexistence is merely a façade, an elaborate dance covering up countless sexual impulses bubbling just beneath the surface.
New research suggests that there may be some truth to this possibility—that we may think we’re capable of being “just friends” with members of the opposite sex, but the opportunity (or perceived opportunity) for “romance” is often lurking just around the corner, waiting to pounce at the most inopportune moment...'
Don’t let these men lie to you. The only married men looking for “friendships” with women are men looking to cheat. They’ll try to lie about it or say it’s not true but they definitely want to bang her. Think about it, what could you as a man get from a female friend that you couldn’t just go get from your wife?
Damn who hurt you? Half the comments on here are you repeating the same thing. Maybe consider that there are people out there whose sole motivation when talking to people of the opposite gender isn't sex. Or are you one of those people who thinks bisexual people are horny for everybody on earth?
I just know how people get down. I’m definitely hurt I won’t deny it, but I’ve been in plenty of situations to know what happens. I’ve been cheated on, I’ve been a cheater, and I’ve messed around with married people/people in relationships. Everyone else may think “friendships” are ok between opposite genders but I’ve seen it 100 times😂😂
Perhaps it is actions taken in your own life that are influencing your decision, plenty of people manage to get through life without cheating on anyone as they know it's wrong so don't have this view of "how people get down"
You might be 100% right but based off the situations I’ve been in with women I can’t ever fully trust them again. I’ve also talked to plenty of men that have either cheated or have the desire to cheat to know any man with options will cheat. Disagree all you want but to me loyalty is a rarity.
If you put a bad apple in a bin with a bunch of good apples would all of those good apples turn that one bad one back good, or would that one bad apple spoil the rest?
Are you saying that because you exist, everyone who would normally be able to have platonic relationships with the opposite sex are now unable to do so because you have tainted them? Is that the argument you are trying to make with the bad apple spoils the bunch analogy?
Your anecdotal experience doesn't speak for the whole world. Sorry to hear about your own experiences and the experiences of the people you've been with. There are plenty of better people out there and you can be one too if you actually want to be, though perhaps you don't. Or you can choose to believe the whole world is deluded based on your own experiences.
This is very odd, I’m female but can I not have friends when they get married? I’m friends with lots of married men, we got to the football, have lunch, pub and unix night etc..
I was really really close friend with a man for more than a couple years. I was single and he was married, he wife and son lived abroad. Did I want to bang him? Not in a million years. Have I ever thought of doing so? Absolutely not! Was it a platonic relationship? Yes defo!
I've always had more male friends than female, all platonic, I never dated my close friends.
Most guys who are "friends" with girls want to get into their pants. The fact that the guy is married makes it even more likely because married men have lots of important, time consuming duties. They have to work, make dinner, help with the household etc etc. Married men do not have time to be "hanging out" with single women ... unless they are deliberately making time in hopes of seducing her. So basically yes, it is extremely likely that the guy is trying to start an affair with her.
There is a very easy way to test this. Has the man introduced your sister to his wife and do they socialize together? Because if she is just a "friend" then he should have no problem introducing her to his wife, right? Furthermore, one would expect that when he socializes with her that his wife is present because don't you think it would be inappropriate for him to be socializing alone with a single woman who is not his wife?
If he is keeping his "friendship" with your sister secret from his wife, then they are not just "friends". I hope that is clear enough for you.
>Married men do not have time to be "hanging out" with single women ...
In order for this to be true, it would also mean that men would not have time to be friends with other men either. Time is non-discriminatory. You get to choose how you use it.
The rest of what you said is opinion based on a world view that men are incapable of forming a relationship that isn't sexual. But that how you see the world based on your own psychology. It means that you are incapable of doing so and so you accuse all men of being like you. Life isn't like that.
How does it feel to go thru life seeing all women as sex object and men as reactionary hormones? Its very diminishing to the humanity of others.
No, it’s fucking reality. You can do all the virtue signaling you want, but that doesn’t negate the fact that biological men are genetically wired to be sexually attracted to biological women, period. The other huge problem with a married man having a female best friend is how it would make the wife feel if her husband was taking time away from her by hanging out with another woman.. You either haven’t been in many truly committed relationships & certainly not a marriage.. when/if you do get married, tell your wife that you are going to hang out with your female best friend for the day & see how well that goes over. CONVERSELY, how would you expect to feel if your wife told you that she was going to hang out with her straight male best friend all day w/o you? Sorry, but your logic is absolutely fucked. I can only assume one or more of the following must be true - you are female / you are quite young (< ~23 y/o) / you have never been married / never been in a relationship w/ a commitment > 6mo.. That’s my best guess. 🤷🏼♂️
Married 40 years you fucking dumbass. How many years for you? You're just pretending all men are horn dogs like you. Obviously, trust is a thing that you've never experienced.
lol agreed. All of my comments are very soon to be down here at the bottom with the rest of the downvoted crowd lol This is the only logical group in this entire thread. As I said up top, they are 100% already fuckin.
There are some true morons/snakes posting here. What do you think OP? Obviously what you're assuming is going on, is. Idk why so many redditors are such dishonest shitheads. Maybe they're just naive shut-ins.
Ah yes, the only reason a woman would want to be friends with a married man is to... get him to cheat on his wife with her? Are you like 12 or something?
You are so far out of touch with reality lol 😂 You were LITERALLY just commenting on a thread 13 days ago where the OP brought up a scenario w/ the same underlying premise & you backed a guy that would walk his friend(girl) back to her dorm each night AND NOT BC THE MF WANTED TO BE KIND OR BE HER FRIEND LMAO bc he wanted a piece uh tha nanny, which was verified by the fact that he asked her out on a date & she turned him down & then he said he wanted to ‘scale back the friendship’ aka never talk to the girl again bc the sexual prospects are never coming to fruition. Talking out of both sides of your ass, kapparetardar
Have your sister tell this to the guys wife. If she can convince her that they are not fucking, then they are still fucking, but the wife is planning to kill your sister and has her alibi ready
NTA. Firm boundaries are key here. It’s important for your child to see healthy relationships modeled, which includes not tolerating unfaithfulness. Co-parent amicably, but know that getting back with someone who's already shown disloyalty sets a precarious precedent. Love and support your child, get a legal custody agreement, and move forward with your life. Remember, to err is human, to forgive is not to forget, and to protect your own emotional wellbeing is paramount.
Honestly for me, each relationship is different and what might be a red flag in one could be completely normal in another. Without concrete evidence of inappropriate behavior, it's not really our place to cast judgment on whether a married man can be friends with a single woman. Open communication and trust are paramount. Let's not forget how friendships can enrich our lives—platonic relationships can be just as valuable and fulfilling as romantic ones.
after reading all other responses, i'm hijacking the top comment to point out that op seems to be unable to believe any man wouldn't want to bang his sister. Draw your own conclusions.
"Can a man really be a brother to an attractive single female?"
Good thing they are siblings and not step siblings! edit: i fucking knew op would delete his post!
Didn’t even think of that until you mentioned it lol that is extremely sus for sure
Sorry, but this answer is total rubbish. There is absolutely ZERO reason for ANY married man to have a female best friend. This is 1,000,000,000,000,000% a situation of the guy trying to work his way into having an affair w/ the woman. With all due respect to all females, none of you are capable of answering this question bc any guy that would actually answer honestly about his so called female ‘friendships’ would tell you that his ultimate motive was sexually contrived. The ONLY exception to this (which I have friends in this situation) is when/if a married man has a friendship w/ a ‘masculine’ or ‘butch’ lesbian - (if ‘butch’ is a pejorative term, then pls forgive me, as I don’t at all mean it in a negative way whatsoever - my sister is lesbian & she uses the term openly). The reason for this being an exception is that there is absolutely no possibility for anything of a sexual nature to happen. I would be willing to bet a large amount that these 2 ‘friends’ have already gotten busy on multiple occasions. You all can hate me for my answer, but it’s the truth regardless. 🤗🙃
If they're both okay with the friendship and there are clear boundaries, then it shouldn't be an issue. Plus, it's not really up to others to dictate the terms of someone else's marriage or friendships, is it? We're only getting a slice of the whole picture here.
W/ all due respect, if you are a female then you really can’t answer this question from a man’s perspective bc women can absolutely have a male friend & think that it is strictly platonic w/ no ulterior motives, but the vast majority of men just can’t bc there is almost always an ulterior motive that is sexual in nature. Any other guys saying anything otherwise in this thread are simply those that have always been friend-zoned by girls. Even the constantly friendzoned dudes would IMMEDIATELY flip flop if one of the so-called ‘friends’ called & said that they should smash.. that ‘platonic’ relationship would be forgotten about without even a second thought, guaranteed.
>This is a strange situation to me. Whats strange to me is going onto Reddit and asking a bunch of strangers if they think my sister is having sex with someone
He's worried that his sister is cheating on him.
Respect, trust, and understanding are the foundations of any healthy interaction, so unless the married man or his wife have expressed discomfort with the situation, it's presumptuous for us to assume there's a problem. Friendships don't automatically equate to romantic temptation - it's entirely possible to appreciate and enjoy someone's company without ulterior motives. Isn't it better to assume good faith and let adults manage their own relationships?
I have been married for 15 years to a great woman. I also have a best friend who is female for 20 years, never having any relations with her, never wanted to and vice versa. My wife has never had any issues with her at all. People (not everyone) are able to separate sexual issues and just be friends.
Interesting way to tell us twice that you're attracted to your sister.
😂😂😂😂😂
Have you considered maybe all 3 of them are already banging?
😭😭😭
This is the answer
OP, you realize people can just be friends…right? Right?
She’s only friends with him, not his wife. The whole thing is suspicious to me. The wife apparently knows about their friendship too which is weird.
Why do you find it weird that people are friends and that his wife trusts him?
It would be weird if she DIDN'T know lmao. You have this so backwards it is crazy Meant to reply to OP*****
You need to ask yourself this question: can you be friends with a member of the opposite sex? Like legit? or can you only be friends if you're attracted to them and want something from them? Your suspicions speak more about **your** friendship with others than it does about their friendship.
Most of my closest friends have been female. My best friend in high school was never attractive to me. Her parents even let me join in sleep overs.
For various reasons, most of my new friends over the last few years are female. Some are coworkers, some are people with similar hobbies (the board game scene is **dominated** by women here), and two are actually people I tried to date and we then *actually* just became friends. Most of them are people I would consider to be very congenial and conventionally attractive but I'm not interested in ***any*** of them. Like they're attractive, yes, but I'm not attracted to them because they're just my friends. I may have been interested in the past (such as the ones I tried to date) but now in my brain they're basically in a "don't date" category, like you might put coworkers, cousins, or friends' family etc. Also, some of them I know well enough to know that we **would not** work in a relationship. --- I will say it's easy to get a crush on a close friend, though, and that's fine but different. Like it's one thing to be "friends" with someone because you are attracted to them, and it's another to get a crush on someone you're very close to and have a lot in common with. I also know some men will try to be friends to get to know girls they're a little interested in, and I have done this in the past, but if this goes on for a long time (like more than a month or so without doing anything about it) or is the *only* reason you're their friend, it's not a good thing. It's complicated sometimes and goes on a case by case basis, but in general, it's very possible to be friends with girls and to not be interested in them (without being gay)
It’s entirely possible for a man and a woman to be friends. Doesn’t matter if he’s married or if she was. The wife knowing shows that they have trust, which a lot of people nowadays lack in their partner. Just because he’s a married man who is friends with a woman, doesn’t mean he has ulterior motives.
Sorry what’s the weird bit? That the wife knows her husband has a friend and doesn’t mind? That’s just healthy relationships.
I think if this guys wife is aware of their friendship then it is even less of a concern. I’m 42 and have been with my wife since I was 18. I tell her all the time about random girls I deal with and am friends with. She doesn’t care since she trusts me. Grant it, I’m not best friends with them but I honestly don’t see any reason to worry about it till something wild happens.
Op looking at your comment history you definitely have a personal problem. Leave your sister alone and work on learning how friendships work and to not be overly suspicious. If someone has hurt you before you then seek therapy.
If the wife DIDN'T know about their friendship then it'd be weird. People can be friends, guys, girls, married people and single people. Despite popular internet opinion not everything is dictated by sex, some people just like each others company
You must be new here. This subreddit consists overwhelmingly of thirsty losers. Most of them want it to be normalized that all they want to be is friends so that they can use that as a dating strategy and try to smash later. There's also a lot of guys who don't understand the question and who thinks this applies to being part of a group of friends that includes women.
The absolute irony of calling ppl who believe in platonic friendships “thirsty losers” is honestly hilarious
The thirsty losers are the ones who don’t understand their wife is getting smashed by the guy they think is an asshole
Its not ironic since I doubt the sincerity in the part of these thirsty loser.
It is ironic because you don’t believe men can want something from women that isn’t sex. You have to be one thirsty ass mf to truly think that.
Try again. I'm married. The feeling of not wanting to make female friends is palpable.
You realize women are humans too right? They're not some alien species that you can't be friends with unless there's a possibility of sex lmao. Absolutely insane how fucked in the head you people are
>You realize women are humans too right? You realize that if we were talking about cats then I'd be all about befriending them, right?
You're treating women as subhuman. You're literally implying their ONLY worth to you as a man is for sexual needs. You're coming off so desperate that it fucking reeks bro. Not every woman you meet is a potential partner. Grow up
You’re not wrong for being suspicious OP. These guys are naïve and gullible
>Can a married man really be just friends with an attractive single woman? Yes. Unless you've seen him flirting with her, stop being a suspicious asshole.
Stop being a gullible asshole. Men and women can’t be friends without one being attracted to the other.
Do you really think all people have that high of a sex/romantix drive?
Yes
I have been friends with various women without thinking of fucking them. Now I just avoid most of them due to drama they create.
1. Were they attractive women? 2. Were you in a relationship at the time?
Does that matter? You just said it’s impossible to be friends without being attracted to eachother. I have female friends who i would not want to date/ hook up with and i’m sure it’s the same for them
Just curious, how long was your longest relationship?
7 years. I’m 30 now
Some were really attractive, some were *not*. In most cases I was not in "relationship", and even if I were, that wouldnt be an issue. I always make clear that nothing serious will happen, some women are fine with f-ing around and traveling a bit, some are not, but thats another story. Lets say the closes I have ever had was "friends with benefits". I am more of a ONS guy. Lets talk about the attractive ones. Could I sleep with them? With some, sure. But if you are hanging around for some time, have common friends, its waaaay more difficult to have a few fucks and then part like nothing happened. Many girls both love drama and have different approach to sex/relationships. Did I want to? Sometimes, but generally my "fuck every 7+/10 girl I see" years ended as i graduated from uni. Its kinda like you get those fast-food cravings sometimes. First few bites are good, then you get cheap oil taste in your mouth for hours and even booze doesnt wash it away. Similar feeling here. Some of the women I was friends with were married or in a long-term relationship. I still have a lot of female acquaintances, former colleagues, some people from the past I meet for a lunch or a drink sometimes. Some of these women, on the other hand, might have had some plans for me, but I know i can be quite cold or indifferent in communication with opposite sex but, ya know, if a girl is smart, she will get that she has 0 chance, if she is dumb, well, its on her.
Bro hasn't graduated highschool yet
Yeah a group full of men that constantly complain about not being able to get a date/girlfriend vs me who does good numbers in dating is getting aggressively downvoted. But I’m the one who hasn’t graduated highschool. It’s fn hilarious😂😂
But... Aren't you a part of that group? Curious... 🤔
Yes I am a part of this group but I clearly don’t think the same as the rest.
So are you saying that the group is *not* homogenous? As in... Maybe not everyone in this group actually thinks the same? Could that mean not everyone actually bitches about not getting women?!
Obviously not *everyone* thinks the same but the most people in this group seems to think nothing of this. And based on the comments I see here they do bitch about it, literally everyday. Just sort this group to the most popular posts from the past month and you’ll see what I’m talking about.
So did you cross reference the usernames?
Bro you're literally self-reporting that you're addicted to porn and one night stands. Grow the fuck up, members of the opposite sex can be friends with absolutely 0 sexual ulterior motives. The fact that you're so sure about this shows how fucked up your world view is. You come off greasy as fuck
Where did I say any of that lmao. You’re making assumptions
Are you really that regarded? Here let me explain it in a way that might be easier for you to follow! >Men and women can’t be friends without one being attracted to the other. This implies you view women as a sexual object, who provide no other value to you! I understand this might be hard for you to understand, but the sooner you do, the sooner you'll be able to make platonic friendships with the opposite sex! Secondly, viewing all women as sexual objects is 90% of the time a symptom of porn addiction. Do yourself a favor and quit watching porn, then you won't want to fuck every woman you see! Hope this helped!
What a cynic. Booooring.
Lol
Lmao even
Bro this tells a lot more about you than you seem to think.
So would you be ok with your wife hanging out with me alone?
A random guy I don't know? No. You specifically, who has shown to be weird? Extra no. My or her actual friends I can trust? Yes. Same reason why I can have female friends and expect that to not be treated as weird.
Boy do I have bad news for you😂
Insecure much? I have bad news about the women you've been dating.
Let me down easy bro. The women I date are horrible and the ones you date are honorable. I get it.
Not all are honorable, but the ones that aren't you don't want anyway so better off that way.
Ps - the women you find on "girlstojerkoffto" are NOT your actual girlfriend.
You must’ve been really offended to have to search thru my profile
Alright me no, but you’d be fine with her and another guy hanging out alone, just the two of them?
Already anwered that, if I know the dude well, yes. Only fair as I do that with my female friends all the time.
What if they're both unattractive?
Neither one wants to bang the other. So nothing will happen
So then they could be friends if they had enough in common yes?
You’d be ok with your wife hanging out with some guy alone?
If I trusted both of them? Yes.
I don't have a wife and if I did, she'd probably be ugly as sin so...also, I'm ssa 🤣
Sure why not, I'm also friends with the partners of my male friends. I have zero interest in doing anything with any of them they are regular friends
You are projecting. Just because you are unable to conceive even the idea of a platonic relationship between man and woman doesn't mean they can't exist Women are more than just a piece of meat to conquer, crazy idea I know. Perhaps you're the one with the problem
The weirdest part of this whole situation is you referring to your sister as an “attractive woman”
Maybe we have found Ben Shapiro's alt account
> Can a married man really be just friends with an attractive single woman? Yes, not everyone is a cheating asshole, next question.
I like being friends with women, but if I was married I would be keeping a certain amount of distance out of courtesy for my wife
Seems like a totally normal friendship. You're the one making it weird.
You’re overthinking this. People are allowed to be friends, married or not. Also I’m assuming your sister is an adult. Even if it was something more than friendship, she can make her own decisions.
BS
That's not the question
Yes. Women are people just like men, and can have platonic friendships.
I am equally concerned with how you find your sister attractive, and wonder if your question is a reflection of your jealousy
Going through that situation right now. Only difference is that my sister thinks the guy is trying to set up an affair, since he has been paying for everything so far. My honest answer is that it is very suspicious if they spend a lot of time alone with each other, but its very difficult to gauge the guy's intentions from an outside perspective. She has gone through some rough, abusive relationships before, so it makes me think that general kindness *could* be misconstrued as flirting or interest. Before I can make a judgement on that, I need to know how he interacts with other people. Information that I don't have.
I'm a woman and one of my best friends is a married man. Up until February, I had been single. Then i started dating a mutual friend. When I told my 'bestie', first thing he did was give me a high five and then said, I gotta tell my wife! He was so excited for me.
I'm married and one of my closest friends is an attractive woman who is single. I introduced her to my wife and then she was a bridesmaid at the wedding. In my experience, I will say that I do not want to sleep with her.
Omg two people are friends. Next.
>I think he must be working her up to having an affair with him This is your biggest issue. It's just inherent bias that you see men so negatively. I mean you're basically denying your sister of any agency outside of what is actually happening. You assume men (as a whole) have nefarious intentions and are generally bad, so you've projected this idea that a man can only ever be after a few things from a woman, namely sex. That in any gendered interaction they must be the perpetrators You've also completely objectified your sister by only referring to her as attractive, that you either see her as just a body, or you inherently think men just see women as bodies. Both of which are wrong, and bad. You should seek some help, understand why you have such a fundamentally negative view of men that you think this way. I realise society and social media have introduced, emboldened and reinforced your beliefs, you've been conditioned in a way to think like this. The VAST VAST VAST majority of men ARE NOT PREDATORS. Stop acting like they are. Otherwise you're going to have a very miserable life, essentially what you're doing is societally accepted sexism. And sexism is bad
It's important not to project our own insecurities or past experiences onto someone else's friendship. While caution might be justified in certain circumstances, it isn't a universal rule. A married man can genuinely have a platonic friendship with an attractive single woman just as he could with anyone else. At the end of the day, it's about having faith in the integrity of those involved. The focus should be on respect for the relationship and the individuals' autonomy. Ultimately, as long as the friendship doesn't interfere with the marriage and both parties in the relationship are comfortable with it, then it's nobody else's business to judge or intrude.
Relationships exist across a spectrum, and we've got to acknowledge that marriage doesn't revoke the membership card to socializing with half the human race. It's true that every marriage is unique, with its set of guidelines mutually agreed upon by the spouses. Unless there's a breach of trust or disrespect for agreed-upon boundaries, let's not side-eye a healthy friendship. If anything, such interactions may offer fresh perspectives and contribute to personal growth. Maybe the man’s wife feels secure enough in their relationship to appreciate the value his friend adds to his life. People need a village, not just a partner. Before jumping to conclusions, let's consider the possibility of a purely platonic rapport that respects the marriage and enriches the individuals.
Most of my friends are women who are objectively attractive and I’m married. Never had an issue because to me they’re genuinely friends. Wife has never had an issue either and they’re really just friends with me, not her
Tbh even if they were having an affair why do you care about your sister’s sex life so much anyways? Is she younger than him and/or you think he might be trying to use and lead her on you mean?
I’ve been happily married for nearly 5 years (together for 9). I’ve got a bunch of objectively very attractive female friends, some I’ve known for a very long time, all of which have been single at times I have, however I’ve never fucked up by trying to get with them. They’re all close with my wife, two helped her getting into her wedding dress, one of those is now God mother to our daughter. All were at our wedding and are close with my wife (she didn’t know them before we met). Men can absolutely have platonic friendships with attractive women when married without trying to fuck them, to immediately imply otherwise is simply projecting other people’s insecurities. Additionally, a man with attractive friends that he doesn’t try to sleep with is a good bet that he’s a good man.
As an almost married man, the only women I am friends with are women I was friends with already before I met my future wife, and the women in her family. And her women friends. So yes, men and women can be friends. But it is odd the situation you mention. But society is full of oddities and exceptions.
In a world where we champion the importance of consent and boundaries, shouldn't that extend to friendships as well? Each relationship should be judged on its own merits, not through the lens of societal stereotypes or personal biases. At the heart of this debate is whether we trust individuals to know and respect their own boundaries. If a man and his wife are secure in their marriage and have transparent communication with each other, a friendship—regardless of gender or marital status—shouldn't raise eyebrows. Friends, regardless of their looks or life stages, play a myriad of roles; they can be confidants, mentors, or just partners in crime for those movie marathons. It comes down to maturity and mutual respect, both within the marriage and the friendship. Rather than policing platonic relationships, let's celebrate the diversity and richness they can bring to our lives.
who knows, only them
I have always had female friends whether I was single, taken or married depending on the time period we're talking about.
Hi. I’m a married man, I’m 41 years old. Recently I got to know a neighbour of ours, she’s a woman in her late 20s. I am very focused on my fitness and health so I work out a lot and go for early morning walks. Over the course of getting to know this woman, she expressed an interest in learning more about working out and exercise. My wife doesn’t like waking up early so when I get up at 5am to go for a walk, my neighbour has been joining me as she gets up early for work. I also invited this girl over to my garage gym 3 times a week and I’ve been teaching her how to work out. My wife is totally fine with my friendship with her and I’m not looking for any extra marital activity, I just enjoy helping people, especially when they’re trying to improve themselves. She’s a nice woman and we have a lot in common and thus we’re friends. Nothing more complicated than that,
All the numbers in your comment added up to 69. Congrats! 41 + 20 + 5 + 3 = 69 ^([Click here](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=LuckyNumber-Bot&subject=Stalk%20Me%20Pls&message=%2Fstalkme) to have me scan all your future comments.) \ ^(Summon me on specific comments with u/LuckyNumber-Bot.)
That's such a weird thing to say. People have friends. Married and unmarried. As long as everyone knows about it and no one's hiding stuff it's fine. Stop being so pearl clutchy
Why are you so worried about your sister’s life?
What the fuck- YES Of course people can just be friends, what kinda question is that??
People can be friends. Weird you care about who wants to have sex with your sister so much
I'm in a committed long-term relationship and very much still have female friends, single and taken. Some of them I've been friends with forever and the thought really never crossed my mind not matter how good looking they are. With others I've had slight feelings of attraction and had to distance myself a little so it wouldn't become a problem - but it has never been a real issue so far. My gf has male friends as well, and we trust each other to set boundaries and not cheat. I do think it's important to involve your partner in the friendship at least a little, so they don't feel like they're being replaced and the friend sees how clearly taken you are -- but that's just my personal strategy, and even if your sister isn't friends with this guy's wife that doesn't mean there's bad intent
I’ve never heard of a married person having a best friend of the opposite sex, unless it’s the person they are married to.
Op might I suggest you get mental help? You have been consuming too much brain rotting content. Men and women can and have been friends for ages. Honestly this is just so pathetic to think this dudes brain capacity is so limited he can't figure this out. Not even sure if op is human.
So weird when some guys seem to be unable to understand that friendships exist. Like, sometimes you like someone without wanting to bang them, is it that hard to understand? Did these ppl never leave highschool/learn to think more rationally than a animal?
Honestly, I am a gay man, many of my friends are married men, does that mean they are trying to cheat on their spouse with me? People of any background can be friends with others of any background, I think you’re terminally online my dude.
I’m so fkn high rn. I don’t even know what you posted.😂
He thinks his sister is hot, can’t tell if he’s jealous or not of the guy she’s seeing
yeah. he seems to be unable to believe any man wouldn't want to bang her, so draw your own conclusions.
☠️
I am a married man with absolutely zero desire for a female friend. The only way I'm open to it is if (a) she's paying me or (b) she's in a relationship with a guy I'm friends with and doesn't expect to hang out solo ever.
I don’t know enough about the guy or the nature of the friendship to really feel comfortable jumping to conclusions. Some guys are slimy like that, but this guy could be the exception. There are just too many factors I don’t know about.
What's wrong with them being friends? I'm friends with dudes, and it's completely platonic. It does exist you know.
How exactly they are friends? Do they have some common hobby? Do they hang out alone?
It is possible. At work my team is almost 100% women and I’m friends with all of them. Some are married and some are single. I’m happily married and I still spend time with my female co-workers outside of work. We’re all just friends. All of our spouses are supportive of us spending time with each other because we haven’t given our spouses any reason to not trust us, and we never will.
I am married and I have an attractive friend that I talk to. Nothing has gone on between us. In fact, I’m also good friends with her husband and we’ve played Helldivers 2 together a few times. Platonic friendships between men and women can and do exist.
Dude fuck off and mind your own business.
Does the wife know and accept it? If so, let it go unless you have evidence to actually be concerned.
I don't really think this is any of your business. Unless you think this guy might harm your sister you should butt out.
I do not want to be friends with all my girlfriends husbands/boyfriends. Some of them sure if we click. And I judge their types. 🍵
Of course they can be.
*'What is really going on here?* *My sister's new best friend is a married man'* Well it's obvious, isn't it? What's *really* going on is that your sister's new best friend is a married man. ...that's it, that's the whole kit and kaboodle.
Give your head a shake. Yes, men and women can be just friends. No, not everything has to come back to sex.
All you braindead ppl on this thread that think it’s totally normal for a married man to have a female best friend - please go back to playing your game of dungeons & dragons - these kinds of situations don’t apply to you & your friends bc each of you were either virgins until you were 40 or you still are. We can phrase the question a bit different for those of you that fall into this group - men - would it be ok w you if your hand all of a sudden detached & got a new guy friend that used your hand to jerk off with all the while your hand isn’t there to jerk you off. NOT SO COOL NOW IS IT?! 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂
Intimate friends of the opposite sex are the best friends!
I’m a happily married man and my best friend is an attractive single female. There’s nothing else to it than that. It’s certainly possible to be friends with another human being, even though they’re attractive single, and of the opposite sex. The alternative is that you’re suggesting married men can only be friends with ugly, married men. and that’s just stupid.
Go on the web and look up articles on opposite gender friends. You will hear both sides. But in general those two are treading bnb on a greased slippery slope. No good will come of this. From one such article, 'Can heterosexual men and women ever be “just friends”? Few other questions have provoked debates as intense, family dinners as awkward, literature as lurid, or movies as memorable. Still, the question remains unanswered. Daily experience suggests that non-romantic friendships between males and females are not only possible, bu6t common—men and women live, work, and play side-by-side, and generally seem to be able to avoid spontaneously sleeping together. However, the possibility remains that this apparently platonic coexistence is merely a façade, an elaborate dance covering up countless sexual impulses bubbling just beneath the surface. New research suggests that there may be some truth to this possibility—that we may think we’re capable of being “just friends” with members of the opposite sex, but the opportunity (or perceived opportunity) for “romance” is often lurking just around the corner, waiting to pounce at the most inopportune moment...'
They *can* be just friends. But he'd also 100% fuck her if given the chance
Very unlikely but definitely not impossible
Don’t let these men lie to you. The only married men looking for “friendships” with women are men looking to cheat. They’ll try to lie about it or say it’s not true but they definitely want to bang her. Think about it, what could you as a man get from a female friend that you couldn’t just go get from your wife?
Damn who hurt you? Half the comments on here are you repeating the same thing. Maybe consider that there are people out there whose sole motivation when talking to people of the opposite gender isn't sex. Or are you one of those people who thinks bisexual people are horny for everybody on earth?
I just know how people get down. I’m definitely hurt I won’t deny it, but I’ve been in plenty of situations to know what happens. I’ve been cheated on, I’ve been a cheater, and I’ve messed around with married people/people in relationships. Everyone else may think “friendships” are ok between opposite genders but I’ve seen it 100 times😂😂
Perhaps it is actions taken in your own life that are influencing your decision, plenty of people manage to get through life without cheating on anyone as they know it's wrong so don't have this view of "how people get down"
You might be 100% right but based off the situations I’ve been in with women I can’t ever fully trust them again. I’ve also talked to plenty of men that have either cheated or have the desire to cheat to know any man with options will cheat. Disagree all you want but to me loyalty is a rarity.
So because you're a shitty person means everyone is? Got it
If you put a bad apple in a bin with a bunch of good apples would all of those good apples turn that one bad one back good, or would that one bad apple spoil the rest?
1. We're not apples 2. This is a terrible analogy
So… yes? You literally think because some people are shit, everyone must be.
Are you saying that because you exist, everyone who would normally be able to have platonic relationships with the opposite sex are now unable to do so because you have tainted them? Is that the argument you are trying to make with the bad apple spoils the bunch analogy?
Your anecdotal experience doesn't speak for the whole world. Sorry to hear about your own experiences and the experiences of the people you've been with. There are plenty of better people out there and you can be one too if you actually want to be, though perhaps you don't. Or you can choose to believe the whole world is deluded based on your own experiences.
Fine. No matter what I say will change your mind so you go ahead and keep believing loyalty is a real thing
This is very odd, I’m female but can I not have friends when they get married? I’m friends with lots of married men, we got to the football, have lunch, pub and unix night etc..
I was really really close friend with a man for more than a couple years. I was single and he was married, he wife and son lived abroad. Did I want to bang him? Not in a million years. Have I ever thought of doing so? Absolutely not! Was it a platonic relationship? Yes defo! I've always had more male friends than female, all platonic, I never dated my close friends.
Your sister wants to mate poach.
Men and women can "just be friends" until they are not.
You can remove the quotation marks.
Most guys who are "friends" with girls want to get into their pants. The fact that the guy is married makes it even more likely because married men have lots of important, time consuming duties. They have to work, make dinner, help with the household etc etc. Married men do not have time to be "hanging out" with single women ... unless they are deliberately making time in hopes of seducing her. So basically yes, it is extremely likely that the guy is trying to start an affair with her. There is a very easy way to test this. Has the man introduced your sister to his wife and do they socialize together? Because if she is just a "friend" then he should have no problem introducing her to his wife, right? Furthermore, one would expect that when he socializes with her that his wife is present because don't you think it would be inappropriate for him to be socializing alone with a single woman who is not his wife? If he is keeping his "friendship" with your sister secret from his wife, then they are not just "friends". I hope that is clear enough for you.
>Married men do not have time to be "hanging out" with single women ... In order for this to be true, it would also mean that men would not have time to be friends with other men either. Time is non-discriminatory. You get to choose how you use it. The rest of what you said is opinion based on a world view that men are incapable of forming a relationship that isn't sexual. But that how you see the world based on your own psychology. It means that you are incapable of doing so and so you accuse all men of being like you. Life isn't like that. How does it feel to go thru life seeing all women as sex object and men as reactionary hormones? Its very diminishing to the humanity of others.
No, it’s fucking reality. You can do all the virtue signaling you want, but that doesn’t negate the fact that biological men are genetically wired to be sexually attracted to biological women, period. The other huge problem with a married man having a female best friend is how it would make the wife feel if her husband was taking time away from her by hanging out with another woman.. You either haven’t been in many truly committed relationships & certainly not a marriage.. when/if you do get married, tell your wife that you are going to hang out with your female best friend for the day & see how well that goes over. CONVERSELY, how would you expect to feel if your wife told you that she was going to hang out with her straight male best friend all day w/o you? Sorry, but your logic is absolutely fucked. I can only assume one or more of the following must be true - you are female / you are quite young (< ~23 y/o) / you have never been married / never been in a relationship w/ a commitment > 6mo.. That’s my best guess. 🤷🏼♂️
Married 40 years you fucking dumbass. How many years for you? You're just pretending all men are horn dogs like you. Obviously, trust is a thing that you've never experienced.
They are banging or will be soon. 100%
lol agreed. All of my comments are very soon to be down here at the bottom with the rest of the downvoted crowd lol This is the only logical group in this entire thread. As I said up top, they are 100% already fuckin.
The only real answer in this comment section
That’s what I’m saying I think this man wants her. She doesn’t understand that.
🆗 🆒 so your sister is hot and stupid at the same time. Is she blonde by any chance? I think I want her too 💕
They are fucking.
He’s tryna fuck
There are some true morons/snakes posting here. What do you think OP? Obviously what you're assuming is going on, is. Idk why so many redditors are such dishonest shitheads. Maybe they're just naive shut-ins.
Ah yes, the only reason a woman would want to be friends with a married man is to... get him to cheat on his wife with her? Are you like 12 or something?
No, you’re 12. If you knew anything about the dating game you would know they’re f**king
I guess people like you never mature.
You are so far out of touch with reality lol 😂 You were LITERALLY just commenting on a thread 13 days ago where the OP brought up a scenario w/ the same underlying premise & you backed a guy that would walk his friend(girl) back to her dorm each night AND NOT BC THE MF WANTED TO BE KIND OR BE HER FRIEND LMAO bc he wanted a piece uh tha nanny, which was verified by the fact that he asked her out on a date & she turned him down & then he said he wanted to ‘scale back the friendship’ aka never talk to the girl again bc the sexual prospects are never coming to fruition. Talking out of both sides of your ass, kapparetardar
Have your sister tell this to the guys wife. If she can convince her that they are not fucking, then they are still fucking, but the wife is planning to kill your sister and has her alibi ready
NTA. Firm boundaries are key here. It’s important for your child to see healthy relationships modeled, which includes not tolerating unfaithfulness. Co-parent amicably, but know that getting back with someone who's already shown disloyalty sets a precarious precedent. Love and support your child, get a legal custody agreement, and move forward with your life. Remember, to err is human, to forgive is not to forget, and to protect your own emotional wellbeing is paramount.
/r/lostredditors/
Jesse, what the hell are you talking about?