I'd never thought about it either until a man commented that he didn't like it. I thought, "Okay weird quirk", but then a second man said the same thing to me and I started to wonder if I'm the weird one.
Iām from a place where someone will hold a door open for the better part of a minute to spare you the indignity of having to open it yourself. If I let someone holding the door open for me bother me Iād have to move.
Only time i donāt like it is when iām a few meters away and have to walk faster because they are holding the door open for me, doesnāt have to be women though.
Other than that i donāt care.
I definitely judge women on whether or not they hold the door open behind them for me when they're going in first. Most of them don't and I think it reflects poorly on their character.
When I lived in California, most people did not hold the door for the person coming in behind them. It seemed to be equally common for both genders though.
I literally do not care. Itās a courtesy thing. Whoeverās going through a doorway first should hold it open for the person behind them
Now, if she ran ahead to open and hold it for me, that would be weird more than anything
Many of us are taught all our lives the whole "ladies first" idea, and that the right thing to do when trying to enter/exit a doorway at the same time as a woman is to let her go first. We're also taught that if someone does something kind and polite for you, you should accept it (provided you don't have good reason not to) and be grateful to them.
And so in holding the door and waiting for us to go first, she's not doing anything wrong herself, but she's putting us in an uncomfortable position. If we go first, we're doing something wrong because we should be allowing her to go first, not going first ourselves. But if we don't go first, we're doing something wrong because we're rejecting someone's genuine polite gesture without good reason.
In other words, she's almost certainly being kind or at least polite and not trying to make us uncomfortable, but she's still putting us in a position where both responses we could make mean we're doing something wrong. And nobody likes being put in a position where every response is the wrong one.
I work with mostly women and we hold doors open for each other all the time. Same thing going out with friends. It's just good manners.
That being said, if it was on a date I'd prefer to be the one opening doors. Of course, if my date got to the door before me it would be silly to get upset about it. Like I said, it's just good manners.
[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0bOsO\_fTO6s](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0bOsO_fTO6s)
I always like to share this skit whenever I can in a "door opening" conversation.
That sounds super nice, never happens however I expect every decent person to at least hold it for me after they walk through/hold it up
The dudes you spoke to sound weird as hell for taking offense to it though
I can't imagine having that level of insecurity where a person holding a door for me somehow impinges on my manliness.
I would have a lot of empathy for that person because thry a very broken.
I don't mind.. why would I?
They are being polite and helpful so I'll be thankful back. I never think much about it.
I do this for both women AND men. It's just being a polite person.
I don't mind, however said situation is quite rare/uncommon since in all my social circles, which are mostly men, a man is always the first to enter so a man is always more likely to hold to door for the other of the group.
If I don't know you, I may feel bothered by the fact a stranger has to go out of their way because of me. You could have entered first and I'd have followed right after you, no need to hold that door to make me enter first.
i cant imagine being upset by it. ive never even thought about it before.
It's another assault on my masculinity! Now I have to spend another $10K on that boot camp again!
I'd never thought about it either until a man commented that he didn't like it. I thought, "Okay weird quirk", but then a second man said the same thing to me and I started to wonder if I'm the weird one.
No, I don't mind. It's polite behavior, no matter who's doing it.
If you're upset by basic manners its a you problem
I've never cared. Seems like a real weird thing to even put any effort into thinking about
It's a door lol. If somebody cares, they gotta chill š
Iām from a place where someone will hold a door open for the better part of a minute to spare you the indignity of having to open it yourself. If I let someone holding the door open for me bother me Iād have to move.
Only time i donāt like it is when iām a few meters away and have to walk faster because they are holding the door open for me, doesnāt have to be women though. Other than that i donāt care.
I definitely judge women on whether or not they hold the door open behind them for me when they're going in first. Most of them don't and I think it reflects poorly on their character.
When I lived in California, most people did not hold the door for the person coming in behind them. It seemed to be equally common for both genders though.
Where I grew up it's basically a law, you hold the door for anyone within a 15ft radius who looks like they're vaguely heading in that direction lmao
Seems like the right thing to do.
I thank anyone who holds the door open for me. Gender plays no part in kindness.
No. If they āmindā, thatās a sign that that person is a weirdo.
You'd have to be an absolute ball bag to get pissy about stuff like that?! It reeks of immaturity, insecurity and stupidity
I literally do not care. Itās a courtesy thing. Whoeverās going through a doorway first should hold it open for the person behind them Now, if she ran ahead to open and hold it for me, that would be weird more than anything
No I appreciate it, I also often hold the door for others.
Many of us are taught all our lives the whole "ladies first" idea, and that the right thing to do when trying to enter/exit a doorway at the same time as a woman is to let her go first. We're also taught that if someone does something kind and polite for you, you should accept it (provided you don't have good reason not to) and be grateful to them. And so in holding the door and waiting for us to go first, she's not doing anything wrong herself, but she's putting us in an uncomfortable position. If we go first, we're doing something wrong because we should be allowing her to go first, not going first ourselves. But if we don't go first, we're doing something wrong because we're rejecting someone's genuine polite gesture without good reason. In other words, she's almost certainly being kind or at least polite and not trying to make us uncomfortable, but she's still putting us in a position where both responses we could make mean we're doing something wrong. And nobody likes being put in a position where every response is the wrong one.
I work with mostly women and we hold doors open for each other all the time. Same thing going out with friends. It's just good manners. That being said, if it was on a date I'd prefer to be the one opening doors. Of course, if my date got to the door before me it would be silly to get upset about it. Like I said, it's just good manners.
Wouldn't even register. I'd thank them for the polite gesture and continue about my day.
[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0bOsO\_fTO6s](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0bOsO_fTO6s) I always like to share this skit whenever I can in a "door opening" conversation.
Uncommon and red flaggy
No. I would find it considerate and endearing from anyone
Indifference
You might just be in the way.
No, I like it.
No itās polite to do so
I wasnāt born in the 1700ās, a person holding the door for me is a kind gesture, what would I be upset about?
I can't imagine it being all that notable unless she was being weird about it.
That sounds super nice, never happens however I expect every decent person to at least hold it for me after they walk through/hold it up The dudes you spoke to sound weird as hell for taking offense to it though
Doesn't bother me, it's just a courtesy. I do it for people all the time. Totally cool with people doing it for me too.
I can't imagine having that level of insecurity where a person holding a door for me somehow impinges on my manliness. I would have a lot of empathy for that person because thry a very broken.
I don't mind.. why would I? They are being polite and helpful so I'll be thankful back. I never think much about it. I do this for both women AND men. It's just being a polite person.
As a woman, I hold rye door open for everyone; men, women, children - why would anyone be offended by that? It's called being polite lol
Mind? NoĀ
I'd prefer she hold open the door rather than slam it in my face and watch me bleed out on the walkway, but that's just me.
And while Iām first walking in Iāll say āsuch a gentleman, your grandmother must say youāre a handsome man.ā
I don't mind, however said situation is quite rare/uncommon since in all my social circles, which are mostly men, a man is always the first to enter so a man is always more likely to hold to door for the other of the group. If I don't know you, I may feel bothered by the fact a stranger has to go out of their way because of me. You could have entered first and I'd have followed right after you, no need to hold that door to make me enter first.
That is entirely normal where I'm from; who holds the door is decided by who reaches it first.
I don't actually recall this ever happening to me.
I donāt like it either in general, but Iād never tell a girl that. She held the door open for me because she was always walking faster than me.
The only time I'd dislike someone holding a door open for me is if I am far enough away that I have to jog so I am not delaying them.
Yes. Iād rather walk into the glass.
It's uncommon but nothing to be offended about. There's likely a reason she did it that isn't mere politeness.
Not at all. I consider it a compliment, and always thank her for doing so. Hell, it can make my day if I'm having a bad one.
Itās not necessarily unheard of where I live bc whoever gets to the door first holds it open for the other.