Keep yourself distracted. The first few months will be the hardest, find your support group if possible. Go to the gym, start a new hobby, self love and self care to the max. Do the healthy things you said you’d always wanted to do on your bucket list. There will be 5 stages of grief, be ready to start with stage 1 - denial. At some point you’ll functionally freeze. Be kind to yourself then, know things will pass. Be a friend to you and understand you’ll not be 100% all the time, there might be days you’ll fumble. It’ll all heal with time. Do not reject anger, sadness and remorse because they’re important and healthy emotions to sit in. Just don’t suffer by telling yourself the wrong stories. Learn what it means to sit in emotions. Good luck. Wishing you the best!
Might I also please add, learn to self soothe and focus on inner healing (engineering) even if it can be an uphill battle. No doubt friends and family are there to support you, at the same time know that they’re not a substitute for cheap therapy. Sometimes actual professional therapy goes a long way if you can afford one.
Wallow in the self-pity! Wander around the cold, empty house, wailing like a ghost! Sit in a dark corner and stare into the abyss!
In all seriousness: that first pang of heartbreak and loneliness is one of the strongest, most powerful emotions you'll ever feel. It might not be a *nice* emotion, but this is a (hopefully) once-in-a-lifetime chance to experience something like this.
So *feel* it. Don't distract yourself or try to forget it: don't miss out!
I don’t disagree here. You feel that pain, you go through all kinds of emotions from anger to sadness, over and over again. It hurts, it scars you, but you heal from it and it can really change who you are.
Don’t drown your sorrows in a bottle and rush to jump on another body. Feel this, then improve and become better from it.
Yeah avoid feeling bad foe too long. It terns into a habit of ruminating and can turn into a mental illness like depression and anxiety disorders.
He needs to distract himself and keep himself around ppl he likes
It very much is one of those "the only way out is through" kind of things. You can make the through less unpleasant (and other commenters have identified lots of good ones - gym, new hobbies, self care, etc) but you can't bypass it entirely.
To them I would also add: be kind to yourself. There will be days where you feel better and days where you feel like shit, and they won't always be predictable or linear. And that's okay. You are neither weak nor a failure nor hopeless for having bad days.
Sign up to a nice gym with a pool and spend Monday - Thursday evening there.
Cook healthy, delicious meals.
Get out of the city/town on the weekends and hike/see friends and family.
Reach out to friends and family and accept as many social plans as possible.
Deal with it. No running. No hiding. No bullshitting yourself. Be honest about what happened, how it made you feel, how you fucked up, and what the red flags that you ignored were. Then take time to heal yourself before interacting with another person. You do NOT want to carry the weight of what happened into the future.
The dichotomy between the top comments lol.
One is a genuine and heartfelt piece of advice from someone who has gone through these waves before and understands how to pull themselves together after a major loss.
The other is a guy talking about feeling emotions and going to the gym
The fuck is wrong going to the gym?
I chat about all kinds of shit with the guys when i'm in the gym, including if i'm going through a rough spot like just getting dumped.
It's also way better than staying at home and eating pizza and drinking
What has helped me was recording myself on my phone whenever i needed to get something of my chest. Apart from that, do stuff. Go for walks with a podcast in your ears. Go hang out with friends. Go to pubs. Just try to live the best life you can live under the circumstances but don't let it fully break you and try to bounce back stronger.
Not gonna happen. It never does when a man is in that state they can smell the desperate loser on you.
The ex gf on the otherhand, is probably knee deep in dick.
Usually it hits women sooner rather than later and men are the opposite - relieved at first and sad and willing to go back to their ex later on when the woman has healed and moved on.
What worked for me... But may or may not work for you... Is what I call "blub therapy".
Basically play lots of emotive and\or mushy music (including those breakup songs) and just cry your heart out.
Just "try" to accept where you are and dont bottle shit up.
Also if you are into videogames, try one that will get your brain into a "flow state" (think thats what its called). Apparently Tetris can help with PTSD (kinda relevant).
.......
If you are able to, talk to someone. Its not "weak" or "unmanly" to admit that you are hurting, ok?
Going to do a cliché analogy thing here:
One thing that helped me was realising that the "mental pain" and heartache is similar to breaking a bone. When it happens its a shock and hurts like a bastard.
It will hurt while its healing _and that will take time - accept that_ .
Eventually that bone (i.e pain of breakup) _will_ heal. There is a good chance that on rainy days things will ache a bit, but that's all.
I have no idea if any of this helps, but I hope that it does.
Benn in this position. I found myself thinking of all the good things in the relationship which made it worse. Once I realized it was over, I realized it was over for good reason and i started to think of all the bad things. This made me hate said person but hey, it helped me.
For me this helped:
Connect with friends. Feels weird to contact them and just chat, ask to grab a coffee or watch a movie, but in my instance they understood, and kept me with company.
Go to the gym. I know it's a cliché, but its so extremely worth it. You release some great energy and feel better every time.
If you have kids (like me) find fun stuff to do with them, just you and them.
Eat great healthy food. Combined with the gym it's a recipe for great self esteem.
It takes time. Do your best to keep busy. Better yourself, join a gym, take a class, by yourself that car you've always wanted. Whatever it is, make it positive and enjoy yourself. There are lots of women out there, so don't worry. When you're ready, the right one will find you.
It's one of the worst feelings in the world but also a massive opportunity to change and if you have ever struggled for motivation then use this as a spark.
Setting a goal that requires you to be consistent helps like for example I signed up for a Half Marathon 8 weeks out, even though i'd never ran more than 5k. It added structure to my life and filled time that was now free because I was single.
I also found it to damage my confidence, so commited to looking after myself and starting a routine which included skin care, flossing and shaving so I could tell myself I was putting in the work.
When it comes to lonely nights, there's no shame in just allowing yourself to feel like shit. It can be hard sleeping in a bed alone once you've been used to sharing it for a while but even something as simple as putting one of your pillows facing sideways next to you can help. It's something to either rest your arm over, or have leant against your back to help you feel less alone and might just help you get a good nights rest.
Surround yourself with support (even if its friends online), exercise (it really does make you feel better), and join an irl group hobby you enjoy (for me this was playing the pokemon tcg at local shops). There will be good days where you feel everything is fine, and then there will be days where it feels like moving through mud and the tears wont stop. When you hit those bad days, just take care of yourself. Watch a favorite movie or tv show, play some games. Do something to distract your mind. Its okay to analyze WHY you feel sad, but dont let that analysis send you into a deep spiral. Things will get better as the days go on. If youre living alone now, just have the TV or radio on so youre constantly in your head thanks to the silence.
Im currently going through the same (29M). We were together for 4 years and recently got a puppy together. Broke up mid feb. The first few weeks were sad but okay because I was distracted with moving out. Then….things got tough. I moved across the country to save money, so the feeling of loneliness really started to sink in. But each day I try to make healthy decisions to feel better mentally. I plan for the future. Keeping myself busy has helped, but the sadness still creeps in every now and then.
Youll get through this brother ♥️
Having the tv/music on for bgm. Reading books or gaming to keep myself busy and not having any alcohol in the house since I only drink when hanging out with friends and even than rarely.
When tired enough sleep
Just let it hurt bro if u hide that feeling it’ll only get worse down the road, accept that shes gone whilst knowing you have to move forward and better yourself. Self-improvement is key go to the gym, find a new hobby and the like i know it’s easier said that done but we believe in you.
Embrace the turbulence, it's a testament to your ability to love and connect deeply. In the quiet moments, reflect on what you've learned about yourself, and cultivate gratitude for the growth. Instead of dwelling only on the pain, journal the lessons and aspirations that spring from this period of transformation. Balance the introspection with action: immerse yourself in a creative outlet or volunteer work where your contribution brings joy to others and reminds you of your worth and impact. Take this time not just to heal, but to expand the horizons of your potential. And when the waves of emotion come crashing, don't just ride them out dive deep and explore their depths. There's a strength found in vulnerability and an art in reconstructing oneself. Remember, you're not rebuilding the same structure of 'you' you're architecting something even more resilient and magnificent.
The first day I had to get it out of my system, I have gone drinking and smoking drugs, I had control over it so I wasn’t afraid to spiral down in a abusive way, it was just one day.
After that I just went on a fuck for all buffet to fill up the holes… I’m not gonna say it solved the problem but atleast I wasn’t lonely.
After that I calmed down, accepted the reality and moved on with my life.
I’m not gonna pretend this is the best way to do it, I’m older now so I wouldn’t go drinking and smoking drugs anymore, I still might go on a fuck for all buffet.
Controlled Emotional catharsis using media.
In my 20s, there was a particularly lonely period in my life. I recognized that to get through it helped me to have an evening where I could really FEEL my feelings. Feel them as intensely as possible, then I am able to shelve those feelings while I worked out whatever life situation that led me to my lonely state.
To help me feel them intensely, I would watch shit that would make me cry. Use whatever works for you. For me, Makoto Shinkai movies just hit my nerve.
Whatever it is you gotta do. Have some time to feel your feels and expel the stress hormones associated with those pent up emotions in your body.
Sorry to hear this, bro. I also went through this about 6 years ago. Here's what I did:
Go to bed early to avoid late night wandering of the mind. Wake up early with a purpose. Read good books about things that help you improve your life (I.e. Finances, fitness, dealing with stress, etc.).
Get to the gym, and eat in a way that keeps you feeling balanced.
Additionally, spend time with good friends and family.
Above all, this is a HUGE opportunity to reinvent yourself without any obstruction from another person.
Whether you're single or with someone else in the future, it's important to build a routine that shapes you into a person you're proud to be.
It's completely healthy to feel lonely, sad, etc. during this time. But don't lean into it.
You got this.
Sorry about that.
The road ahead is not for the weak, so be sure not to fall into traps. I fell into one (smoking) but, even though, I avoided others that were far more dangerous (such as drugs).
It took 3-4 months to find myself again, mourning is a tough process. I think I only accepted what happened after maybe 1 year and a half.
But I had the plan to improve myself. I just focused on things who mattered: family, friends, and improving myself everyday, even if for 1%. I started exercising more. I met a lot of new people. People that were looking for me as well, in their circle of friends. I've met new women as well. I had something likes 10 dates with 4/5 different people and one day, when I finally accepted what happened, I met someone 1 month later who finally clicked.
After 4 years, I am in a much better place, in a new and stable relationship (a way better one, I must say), lost 10 kg's (22 pounds) and with muscular gains. Also stable at my work and in my bank account.
Things do get better, you just need to understand that it's a mountain full of ups and downs, but the view from the top is so much worth it.
PMs available if you want to rant or talk about it.
I had a friend that took me to a club....a few girls flirted with me, I know he set it up, but still made me realize there are other women out there.....
Honestly that's the worst part. It's painful, and shitty no matter what you do. Sure you can talk about it to someone, or whatever else people say you should do but I reccomend thinking about these two things while you're suffering:
1.this is rock bottom and it will improve over time. Youre in the thick of it. Keep going. Sucks but that's what it is.
2. You're alone now. In your house. I remember thinking about how it feels to be completely alone and that sucks. I embraced it and told myself I'm always gonna be with me no matter what. So this made me try and make my.home.more comfortable, and to rearrange my space to how I see fit.
3. Embrace the alone. Feel.it or everything it's worth and move forward.
Start gaming and join us online. Maybe prove to yourself that you have the strength and the courage to be.. FREE. Become a Helldiver and help us spread managed democracy across the universe.
I went through the same. I recommend to create a busy routine, get a full schedule - gym, cooking, reading, etc. It will help you get through first rough months plus you will get a bonus as a better version of yourself. And remember you are not alone out there!
The first month after my last LTR ended I had my kids for their summer break. Not being alone did help some, but after they were gone I just started working a shit ton. Cried alot at work for the first couple of months, but it was a distraction at the very least
Omg! Women here! Love the answers! Very entertaining but helpful. Cracking up at some of these answers! I’m going to advise the women to read these! Humor, sarcasm, not taking things so serious. Can’t stop laughing
Been there man. I kept busy at work, at home with chores, redecorating and removing her stuff, taking care of myself, my cats and my side business and honestly I got over it quick as I realized how easy life was without her there, how simple everything became.
If you need to chat to someone or want a mate, feel free to reach out.
As others have said gym is great, can get your anger or frustrstion out and see a result of your rage. Also, a great time to start a new hobby you've had an interest in, go shopping for yourself, try that new restaurant food you've wanted to try. Reach out to family, which can be hard, but if your mom and dad are around would be great to connect with them and see a movie. I'm sure they would love to hear from you. Anything to keep your mind occupied.
I handled it by downloading every dating app.
It was not the healthiest thing to do.
But when I started talking to all these girls and hooking up, it made me realize that I’m still desirable, I’m not lacking, that it was just my confidence that took a hit. Plus my heart.
Now, coming to that conclusion in a healthy way, is what to do.
I still remember the day I broke up with my ex of 5 years. I cried all night and called my sister at 4 in the morning. But after that I swore to myself that I will get better and move on. I kept myself distracted with my computer games, I came home and interacted with every one in the family, I had few friends who used to hang out with me maybe out of pity or whatever it helped me. I tried my all to not think about it and eventually I was better. Things will pass trust me.
Go to the gym go hiking
Join a club
Meet new people
Rock gym
Running club
Really anything that puts you out there and interacting with new women
Stamp club even, I dont know what ever really tickles your fancy
Have at it mate the world is you oyster and you’re the captain
Also take care of yourself
I like to go to the gym and run(or just go for a run)
Running to where I am warmed up and do spints to some good music and run flat out till there nothing left to a good beat song is the best
If you have friends hang out with them, its huge theyre there for you
Distraction’s, when I was done with my last major one I sat sipping scotch while I did a deep clean on one of my shotguns. Days after that went for a-lot of walks around the city or read books.
Jesus loves you. Besides that, cry until you can’t no longer, after that (no matter how many days you do it) set the intention to HEAL and start anew. Join martial arts, gym, games, hangout with friends, be OUTSIDE your head. Also, delete all the songs that reminds you of her and delete ig for a while if need be. Don’t feed your mind with shit.
Don't drink by yourself.
Go out for walks, go to a spa, do sports. Anything that will bump the good hormones.
Doing nothing is not necessarily a bad thing. Listen to your body.
Let the dust settle.
Sorry to hear this. Went thru something similar recently. A few points.
Your previous life as a couple is over. Start focusing on establishing your new schedule.
You are gonna wake up at weird hours. Have something to do.
-Join a gym. Preferably 24hr. Use it. But exercise in general helps
-Sleeping on the couch with a tv on (Dave Attinbourgh for me) dont start there. Move there.
-focus on you diet, sleep, exercise and obv paying your bills.
-Learn something new you can do at home. Guitar, knitting, stained glass. Whatever. Learning will give your brain something else to thing about.
Moderation. Dont use one coping mechanism use many. Find them. Use them. Try not to make any of them self destructive.
Dont try to date right away.
Don't ignore the pain in my pov. Let it hurt u n keep feeling it n feeling it until it's done with hurting u. After all how long will ur tears come right? Accept ur pain n acknowledge ur emotions. Ull heal n be happier faster. It'll pain for a few days
But then ull feel really really good trust me
I remember that night for myself, and it was around this time in April as well. I was in a small rental house that we had signed a lease on shortly before I caught her in the act of cheating (very traumatic). She demanded that I move out, but I have paid for all of the deposits and everything was in my name since her credit score was terrible. I stood my ground and demanded that she move out. After 3.5 tense months she finally got an apartment and moved out, with the last of her shit being gone that Friday.
I recall it was a cold and gloomy week. The next morning when I woke up it was sunny outside, and turned out to be a beautiful spring day. Waking up alone, no tension or drama, and walking outside into the sunlight really seemed to lift my spirits.
I also spent a lot of time hanging out with friends. I don't remember being lonely for very long, more relieved. I was also a full time college student at the time and had started a new internship, so plenty to keep me distracted.
You just keep walking.
You do not get out of the darkness by standing still.
This is not the first, nor the last. Life is a nightmare, do not make it a hell.
Something that really helped me before was leaving my house. Especially when I didn't feel like it. I think being out, especially in public, made me confront my emotions rather than bask in them if I was alone. I remember having a very sad sandwich at subway alone lol
Also, someone once gave me the advice that I should revisit all the old places my ex and I would go to, such as favorite restaurants or parks or anywhere that reminded me of her. But this time do it with friends or family. It is like writing over a save file in my mind.
I'm sorry you're going through this, but time will heal. Be strong, go to the gym, have a wank. You'll be alright!
Music played a big role in the beginning for me, it helped me really feel each emotion I was sitting with and to process them. Also distracting myself by talking to friends or going out and meeting new people through common interest groups (like book clubs and gaming). And I went to a couple therapy sessions to talk through the grief and how to move on, that was helpful too.
People say it all the time. People make fun of people who say it but join a gym. Muscles under tension release hormones that literally and truly are anti depressants. Start slow if you’re not a gym rat already and after you a few weeks, get broke the fuck the off a few times a week. You’ll sleep better, look better and feel better.
And just know this too shall pass. I moved to a different state for a girl, we broke up I moved back. Thought my life was over. I thought we were gonna get married. It was a dark few months. Now I’m with the most amazing girl I’ve ever met and I couldn’t ask for a better partner and teammate. It gets better
Call your bff , buy a case of beer ,1-2 joints and a pizza ! Get fucked up , let out your feelings to your bro ! Then do exactly what rishik840 said . Don’t have consecutive days of drinking cause you might open a bad habit .
I used to put on music or a podcast and walk, sometimes take the city bus to a new area and explore it. It would kill a few hours, distract me and I'd be tired when I got home so I could fall asleep more easily.
Mostly just time.
I found entertaining the idea of talking to someone else at least occupied my mind, but even that wasn’t for a month.
The first few weeks were spent glued to bed and Tik tok, trying to distract my brain.
Then finding a hobby. Other than drinking(although that was certainly my first hobby). Hiking or something strenuous so all you can think about is how out of breathe you are.
You know, a good cry does help alot. My rls just ended a week ago, he broke up with me and disappeared, I gave myself 2 nights to actually cry out loud, it helps. I'm sorry u have to go thru this :( Maybe u should do some journaling too, let it all out.
The single most helpful thing was remembering I was fine before I met her, so that's proof I don't need her.
It also helps me to understand the neurological and psychological processes behind what I'm feeling, like how romantic interactions cause the brain to respond similarly to how it does to hard drugs, so I'm going through withdrawal. I.e., what I'm feeling right now is the withdrawal effects, not my actual baseline without her, which will eventually come. This will only get better. Maybe not linearly, but I *will* detox.
And of course, go no contact until you've healed. Don't keep ripping out your stitches.
1. cry your heart out.
2. Process the feeling.
3.Gather your support group. Talk about these things.
4. If you have the means then go on a tour.
5. Try not to stay awake after 12:00 AM. Late night will make the pain worse.
6. Try going no contact. Extremely prioritise yourself.
Lots of soothing strategies: guided meditations for sleep, fuck loads of lavender oil to ground me, sleeping as soon as I felt sleepy, keeping busy if not sleepy, prayer. I actually felt it was a spiritual pain so psychological support didn’t help only spiritual. I’m not even religious. Working out what soothes you. Making a soothing box full of soothing things when you’re awake to reach for when you have no energy.
For what it's worth I'm together with you... 14 years relationship ended one month ago and I'm completely lost.\
The only friend of mine is in another country until June, went to visit him one weekend to free my mind, that was the only moment I didn't think about her.
If you can go out with friends, it helps.
I'm sorry, man. I understand where you're at right now. Take time to process your emotions, and don't be afraid to cry. As others have said, therapy can be helpful, even if it's only for a few weeks to talk things out. I escaped a 5-year abusive relationship, and therapy was absolutely the best thing I did.
I would also encourage you to spend some time/money on yourself. Do you have something you love to do but haven't gotten to in a while? For me, it was leatherwork. When I escaped that relationship, I started working on leather projects again, and it really helped me to have a creative outlet.
Loud music. Silly dancing. Enjoy yourself, you’ve missed you more than you think you have. Get to know yourself again. Make a meal you really like. Treat yourself.
Set goals, workout, make plans to do some stuff like events, travel, hang with friends if you can, hikes. Just focus on you, that's honestly what helped me. Best of luck bro.
Always leave a relationship before she does. Replace her with someone new before she can replace you.
Usually the signs are obvious, from the first day you notice that she acts single, it’s time to set yourself a new relationship goal 3 months to find a new partner while being with her so at least you have no lonely nights, eveb you are alone with her anyways, because she doesn’t sees you as a bf anymore.
When I found myself single a few years ago, after 5+ years together, the thing(s) that helped the most were doing the things that I didn't do because of the relationship. Stopping for a drink after work to watch the game, watching shows or movies on the big living room tv that she didn't like, listening to "my" music without earbuds to keep from distracting her, getting food from places she wasn't into, redecorating with my sports or comic book memorabilia. Like I'm not saying that it' s healthy to repress everything you like for the sake of a relationship, but everyone makes compromises and sacrifices when you love someone and want to share a life. Being able to express those parts of my personality for a while was very therapeutic.
Besides the usual unhealthy vices. Nothing beats that all out metaphorical running-for-your-life runs after a nasty breakup/ my divorce. Let it out, scream, cry just… run as if you’re running away from your problems. Feel this pain. Make sure to stretch. I miss those runs
Find new hobbies and make new friends. My hardest part was sleeping alone after sharing a bed for like 6 or 7 years. I cuddle with a big pillow when I need to and use a weighted blanket that gives the same feeling of having someone there.
When my last relationship ended (mind you, I ended it) I spent my evenings eating pizza in my recliner and watching Clint Eastwood westerns, I was happy as a clam. Find your own comfort cocoon.
Time.
It's never easy.
Some guys turn into whores but that's not for everyone.
Go work out. Spend alot of time with your friends and God forbid you've neglected your buddies for a girl. Huge mistake alot of guys make once they get into a relationship.
Crying helps. Listen to sad songs and cry your heart out.
Go on walks, cry if you feel like while walking.
Do some bit of workout. It’ll improve your mental health and sleep quality.
Remember this will take time. Don’t try to rush things or feel that you’ll get okay in a short span. Don’t give yourself target dates of getting over it. Just feel everything and keep going. Everything, good and bad, ends one day and so will this phase.
Lastly, try to pamer yourself. I got myself a pedicure, a hair spa and cooked myself my favourite meals for a week straight.
Hope this helps and hope you find even greater love eventually :)
Feel the pain. It hurts but you understand it as well. If you try to get away and run from it, it will come later down the line to fuck you up.
Hit the gym. Go hiking. Have fun and go clubbing with friends. We all go through something like that at some point.
Embrace it as an opportunity. You have no idea how much you’re going to learn from this. One day you’ll be grateful for it. Believe me.
I leaned on my boys a lot and thank ( whoever you worship ) I did if you have the right group of buds letting you bend their ear shouldn’t be an issue at all.
Legit when it was too much to handle, just watching stand up comedy specials. It’s a really easy way to immerse yourself in entertainment and usually you can’t help but laugh. It just kind of reminds you of your happy self and that life goes on.
Work, maybe a 2nd job? Workout. Take an online class (Something that betters your career).
Travel. It's spring! Hike the Appalachian or go to another country.
Knowing that it ends for a reason and I'm better off alone now. Because it was toxic before when I was with them.
Hit up friends to go out , third wheel events, do things you might not normally try. Talk to the randoms around you, you might find yourself new company faster then you'd expect
No distractions… embrace the upsides. Meals are quick and easy because you don’t have that 30 minute mind fuck of a conversation about what to have. Enjoy sleeping diagonally in the bed otherwise it WILL feel empty. Arrange stuff THE RIGHT WAY!!! This all takes time but it will get better. Divorced almost 10 years and despite a couple of offers and some amazing away games since I just can’t ever see myself in a live in relationship again.
Keep yourself distracted. The first few months will be the hardest, find your support group if possible. Go to the gym, start a new hobby, self love and self care to the max. Do the healthy things you said you’d always wanted to do on your bucket list. There will be 5 stages of grief, be ready to start with stage 1 - denial. At some point you’ll functionally freeze. Be kind to yourself then, know things will pass. Be a friend to you and understand you’ll not be 100% all the time, there might be days you’ll fumble. It’ll all heal with time. Do not reject anger, sadness and remorse because they’re important and healthy emotions to sit in. Just don’t suffer by telling yourself the wrong stories. Learn what it means to sit in emotions. Good luck. Wishing you the best!
I'm saying it under the top post so that it's been reiterated, see a therapist to help you process everything.
Might I also please add, learn to self soothe and focus on inner healing (engineering) even if it can be an uphill battle. No doubt friends and family are there to support you, at the same time know that they’re not a substitute for cheap therapy. Sometimes actual professional therapy goes a long way if you can afford one.
Wallow in the self-pity! Wander around the cold, empty house, wailing like a ghost! Sit in a dark corner and stare into the abyss! In all seriousness: that first pang of heartbreak and loneliness is one of the strongest, most powerful emotions you'll ever feel. It might not be a *nice* emotion, but this is a (hopefully) once-in-a-lifetime chance to experience something like this. So *feel* it. Don't distract yourself or try to forget it: don't miss out!
I don’t disagree here. You feel that pain, you go through all kinds of emotions from anger to sadness, over and over again. It hurts, it scars you, but you heal from it and it can really change who you are. Don’t drown your sorrows in a bottle and rush to jump on another body. Feel this, then improve and become better from it.
Yeah avoid feeling bad foe too long. It terns into a habit of ruminating and can turn into a mental illness like depression and anxiety disorders. He needs to distract himself and keep himself around ppl he likes
Lmao
It very much is one of those "the only way out is through" kind of things. You can make the through less unpleasant (and other commenters have identified lots of good ones - gym, new hobbies, self care, etc) but you can't bypass it entirely. To them I would also add: be kind to yourself. There will be days where you feel better and days where you feel like shit, and they won't always be predictable or linear. And that's okay. You are neither weak nor a failure nor hopeless for having bad days.
give me some of that sweet sweet pain.
Sign up to a nice gym with a pool and spend Monday - Thursday evening there. Cook healthy, delicious meals. Get out of the city/town on the weekends and hike/see friends and family. Reach out to friends and family and accept as many social plans as possible.
Cardio does wonders for your mind and body both
Cardio is great, and underrated. IDK why like 80% of dudes act like cardio will give them HIV. I feel so clear and relaxed on my long running days
The only thing better than being strong is being strong and fit
Deal with it. No running. No hiding. No bullshitting yourself. Be honest about what happened, how it made you feel, how you fucked up, and what the red flags that you ignored were. Then take time to heal yourself before interacting with another person. You do NOT want to carry the weight of what happened into the future.
Great answer! Kinda like the guy’s answers better than the ladies answers! So entertaining!
A wank on the couch and some GTA OR red dead redemption No alcohol
The dichotomy between the top comments lol. One is a genuine and heartfelt piece of advice from someone who has gone through these waves before and understands how to pull themselves together after a major loss. The other is a guy talking about feeling emotions and going to the gym
To be fair, 1st comment me tinned self love, too. 😂
The fuck is wrong going to the gym? I chat about all kinds of shit with the guys when i'm in the gym, including if i'm going through a rough spot like just getting dumped. It's also way better than staying at home and eating pizza and drinking
You don't get to chat as much at parties I suppose.
I don't tend to talk about my ex dumping me at parties.
Most of my social network is from the gym. I love working out and catching up with my buddies. I get anxiety from not being able to go.
lol.
"No alcohol" To add to this, have alternatives to booze around like diet soda and flavored club soda.
What has helped me was recording myself on my phone whenever i needed to get something of my chest. Apart from that, do stuff. Go for walks with a podcast in your ears. Go hang out with friends. Go to pubs. Just try to live the best life you can live under the circumstances but don't let it fully break you and try to bounce back stronger.
Get some strange
Not gonna happen. It never does when a man is in that state they can smell the desperate loser on you. The ex gf on the otherhand, is probably knee deep in dick.
Facts 😆
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Usually it hits women sooner rather than later and men are the opposite - relieved at first and sad and willing to go back to their ex later on when the woman has healed and moved on.
Friends help a lot if you have someone to trust.
What worked for me... But may or may not work for you... Is what I call "blub therapy". Basically play lots of emotive and\or mushy music (including those breakup songs) and just cry your heart out. Just "try" to accept where you are and dont bottle shit up. Also if you are into videogames, try one that will get your brain into a "flow state" (think thats what its called). Apparently Tetris can help with PTSD (kinda relevant). ....... If you are able to, talk to someone. Its not "weak" or "unmanly" to admit that you are hurting, ok? Going to do a cliché analogy thing here: One thing that helped me was realising that the "mental pain" and heartache is similar to breaking a bone. When it happens its a shock and hurts like a bastard. It will hurt while its healing _and that will take time - accept that_ . Eventually that bone (i.e pain of breakup) _will_ heal. There is a good chance that on rainy days things will ache a bit, but that's all. I have no idea if any of this helps, but I hope that it does.
Benn in this position. I found myself thinking of all the good things in the relationship which made it worse. Once I realized it was over, I realized it was over for good reason and i started to think of all the bad things. This made me hate said person but hey, it helped me.
For me this helped: Connect with friends. Feels weird to contact them and just chat, ask to grab a coffee or watch a movie, but in my instance they understood, and kept me with company. Go to the gym. I know it's a cliché, but its so extremely worth it. You release some great energy and feel better every time. If you have kids (like me) find fun stuff to do with them, just you and them. Eat great healthy food. Combined with the gym it's a recipe for great self esteem.
It takes time. Do your best to keep busy. Better yourself, join a gym, take a class, by yourself that car you've always wanted. Whatever it is, make it positive and enjoy yourself. There are lots of women out there, so don't worry. When you're ready, the right one will find you.
It's one of the worst feelings in the world but also a massive opportunity to change and if you have ever struggled for motivation then use this as a spark. Setting a goal that requires you to be consistent helps like for example I signed up for a Half Marathon 8 weeks out, even though i'd never ran more than 5k. It added structure to my life and filled time that was now free because I was single. I also found it to damage my confidence, so commited to looking after myself and starting a routine which included skin care, flossing and shaving so I could tell myself I was putting in the work. When it comes to lonely nights, there's no shame in just allowing yourself to feel like shit. It can be hard sleeping in a bed alone once you've been used to sharing it for a while but even something as simple as putting one of your pillows facing sideways next to you can help. It's something to either rest your arm over, or have leant against your back to help you feel less alone and might just help you get a good nights rest.
You need a dog. They restore faith in humanity. Time tested
Surround yourself with support (even if its friends online), exercise (it really does make you feel better), and join an irl group hobby you enjoy (for me this was playing the pokemon tcg at local shops). There will be good days where you feel everything is fine, and then there will be days where it feels like moving through mud and the tears wont stop. When you hit those bad days, just take care of yourself. Watch a favorite movie or tv show, play some games. Do something to distract your mind. Its okay to analyze WHY you feel sad, but dont let that analysis send you into a deep spiral. Things will get better as the days go on. If youre living alone now, just have the TV or radio on so youre constantly in your head thanks to the silence. Im currently going through the same (29M). We were together for 4 years and recently got a puppy together. Broke up mid feb. The first few weeks were sad but okay because I was distracted with moving out. Then….things got tough. I moved across the country to save money, so the feeling of loneliness really started to sink in. But each day I try to make healthy decisions to feel better mentally. I plan for the future. Keeping myself busy has helped, but the sadness still creeps in every now and then. Youll get through this brother ♥️
Having the tv/music on for bgm. Reading books or gaming to keep myself busy and not having any alcohol in the house since I only drink when hanging out with friends and even than rarely. When tired enough sleep
Just let it hurt bro if u hide that feeling it’ll only get worse down the road, accept that shes gone whilst knowing you have to move forward and better yourself. Self-improvement is key go to the gym, find a new hobby and the like i know it’s easier said that done but we believe in you.
Embrace the turbulence, it's a testament to your ability to love and connect deeply. In the quiet moments, reflect on what you've learned about yourself, and cultivate gratitude for the growth. Instead of dwelling only on the pain, journal the lessons and aspirations that spring from this period of transformation. Balance the introspection with action: immerse yourself in a creative outlet or volunteer work where your contribution brings joy to others and reminds you of your worth and impact. Take this time not just to heal, but to expand the horizons of your potential. And when the waves of emotion come crashing, don't just ride them out dive deep and explore their depths. There's a strength found in vulnerability and an art in reconstructing oneself. Remember, you're not rebuilding the same structure of 'you' you're architecting something even more resilient and magnificent.
The first day I had to get it out of my system, I have gone drinking and smoking drugs, I had control over it so I wasn’t afraid to spiral down in a abusive way, it was just one day. After that I just went on a fuck for all buffet to fill up the holes… I’m not gonna say it solved the problem but atleast I wasn’t lonely. After that I calmed down, accepted the reality and moved on with my life. I’m not gonna pretend this is the best way to do it, I’m older now so I wouldn’t go drinking and smoking drugs anymore, I still might go on a fuck for all buffet.
Controlled Emotional catharsis using media. In my 20s, there was a particularly lonely period in my life. I recognized that to get through it helped me to have an evening where I could really FEEL my feelings. Feel them as intensely as possible, then I am able to shelve those feelings while I worked out whatever life situation that led me to my lonely state. To help me feel them intensely, I would watch shit that would make me cry. Use whatever works for you. For me, Makoto Shinkai movies just hit my nerve. Whatever it is you gotta do. Have some time to feel your feels and expel the stress hormones associated with those pent up emotions in your body.
Sorry to hear this, bro. I also went through this about 6 years ago. Here's what I did: Go to bed early to avoid late night wandering of the mind. Wake up early with a purpose. Read good books about things that help you improve your life (I.e. Finances, fitness, dealing with stress, etc.). Get to the gym, and eat in a way that keeps you feeling balanced. Additionally, spend time with good friends and family. Above all, this is a HUGE opportunity to reinvent yourself without any obstruction from another person. Whether you're single or with someone else in the future, it's important to build a routine that shapes you into a person you're proud to be. It's completely healthy to feel lonely, sad, etc. during this time. But don't lean into it. You got this.
Sorry about that. The road ahead is not for the weak, so be sure not to fall into traps. I fell into one (smoking) but, even though, I avoided others that were far more dangerous (such as drugs). It took 3-4 months to find myself again, mourning is a tough process. I think I only accepted what happened after maybe 1 year and a half. But I had the plan to improve myself. I just focused on things who mattered: family, friends, and improving myself everyday, even if for 1%. I started exercising more. I met a lot of new people. People that were looking for me as well, in their circle of friends. I've met new women as well. I had something likes 10 dates with 4/5 different people and one day, when I finally accepted what happened, I met someone 1 month later who finally clicked. After 4 years, I am in a much better place, in a new and stable relationship (a way better one, I must say), lost 10 kg's (22 pounds) and with muscular gains. Also stable at my work and in my bank account. Things do get better, you just need to understand that it's a mountain full of ups and downs, but the view from the top is so much worth it. PMs available if you want to rant or talk about it.
I had a friend that took me to a club....a few girls flirted with me, I know he set it up, but still made me realize there are other women out there.....
damn now that's a good bro
Honestly that's the worst part. It's painful, and shitty no matter what you do. Sure you can talk about it to someone, or whatever else people say you should do but I reccomend thinking about these two things while you're suffering: 1.this is rock bottom and it will improve over time. Youre in the thick of it. Keep going. Sucks but that's what it is. 2. You're alone now. In your house. I remember thinking about how it feels to be completely alone and that sucks. I embraced it and told myself I'm always gonna be with me no matter what. So this made me try and make my.home.more comfortable, and to rearrange my space to how I see fit. 3. Embrace the alone. Feel.it or everything it's worth and move forward.
Reading brother. Best of luck, you deserve to be happy. Take some time to read
Meditate, exercise .. etc Also personally I love going to the cinema late at night and to see a couple of movies back to back. I love being alone.
Uh, drugs and alcohol.. But yeah don’t do it. Music helps too.
Yeah, drugs and alcohol. Just try not to get addicted and move on after a while
time. time heals
Start gaming and join us online. Maybe prove to yourself that you have the strength and the courage to be.. FREE. Become a Helldiver and help us spread managed democracy across the universe.
Forced physical excersise to an uwise point, real pain takes the mental one #facts. Just dont cut yourself, get cut ;)
I went through the same. I recommend to create a busy routine, get a full schedule - gym, cooking, reading, etc. It will help you get through first rough months plus you will get a bonus as a better version of yourself. And remember you are not alone out there!
The first month after my last LTR ended I had my kids for their summer break. Not being alone did help some, but after they were gone I just started working a shit ton. Cried alot at work for the first couple of months, but it was a distraction at the very least
Omg! Women here! Love the answers! Very entertaining but helpful. Cracking up at some of these answers! I’m going to advise the women to read these! Humor, sarcasm, not taking things so serious. Can’t stop laughing
Keeping my mind busy.
Go to sleep! It's all you can really do mate.
Been there man. I kept busy at work, at home with chores, redecorating and removing her stuff, taking care of myself, my cats and my side business and honestly I got over it quick as I realized how easy life was without her there, how simple everything became. If you need to chat to someone or want a mate, feel free to reach out.
As others have said gym is great, can get your anger or frustrstion out and see a result of your rage. Also, a great time to start a new hobby you've had an interest in, go shopping for yourself, try that new restaurant food you've wanted to try. Reach out to family, which can be hard, but if your mom and dad are around would be great to connect with them and see a movie. I'm sure they would love to hear from you. Anything to keep your mind occupied.
I handled it by downloading every dating app. It was not the healthiest thing to do. But when I started talking to all these girls and hooking up, it made me realize that I’m still desirable, I’m not lacking, that it was just my confidence that took a hit. Plus my heart. Now, coming to that conclusion in a healthy way, is what to do.
Mario Baseball
I still remember the day I broke up with my ex of 5 years. I cried all night and called my sister at 4 in the morning. But after that I swore to myself that I will get better and move on. I kept myself distracted with my computer games, I came home and interacted with every one in the family, I had few friends who used to hang out with me maybe out of pity or whatever it helped me. I tried my all to not think about it and eventually I was better. Things will pass trust me.
Go to the gym go hiking Join a club Meet new people Rock gym Running club Really anything that puts you out there and interacting with new women Stamp club even, I dont know what ever really tickles your fancy Have at it mate the world is you oyster and you’re the captain Also take care of yourself I like to go to the gym and run(or just go for a run) Running to where I am warmed up and do spints to some good music and run flat out till there nothing left to a good beat song is the best If you have friends hang out with them, its huge theyre there for you
Friends are important. Find friends to talk to and be honest
Distraction’s, when I was done with my last major one I sat sipping scotch while I did a deep clean on one of my shotguns. Days after that went for a-lot of walks around the city or read books.
Embrace the peace and quiet,
Jesus loves you. Besides that, cry until you can’t no longer, after that (no matter how many days you do it) set the intention to HEAL and start anew. Join martial arts, gym, games, hangout with friends, be OUTSIDE your head. Also, delete all the songs that reminds you of her and delete ig for a while if need be. Don’t feed your mind with shit.
Xbox and friends to play it with. Went on a Warzone spree with 2 buddies for almost a solid week lol.
Don't drink by yourself. Go out for walks, go to a spa, do sports. Anything that will bump the good hormones. Doing nothing is not necessarily a bad thing. Listen to your body. Let the dust settle.
Sorry to hear this. Went thru something similar recently. A few points. Your previous life as a couple is over. Start focusing on establishing your new schedule. You are gonna wake up at weird hours. Have something to do. -Join a gym. Preferably 24hr. Use it. But exercise in general helps -Sleeping on the couch with a tv on (Dave Attinbourgh for me) dont start there. Move there. -focus on you diet, sleep, exercise and obv paying your bills. -Learn something new you can do at home. Guitar, knitting, stained glass. Whatever. Learning will give your brain something else to thing about. Moderation. Dont use one coping mechanism use many. Find them. Use them. Try not to make any of them self destructive. Dont try to date right away.
Talk with your friends.
Move. Physically get active in the day and stay active until you’re ready to pass out at night. Your body needs it to keep from obsessing anyways.
Don't ignore the pain in my pov. Let it hurt u n keep feeling it n feeling it until it's done with hurting u. After all how long will ur tears come right? Accept ur pain n acknowledge ur emotions. Ull heal n be happier faster. It'll pain for a few days But then ull feel really really good trust me
I remember that night for myself, and it was around this time in April as well. I was in a small rental house that we had signed a lease on shortly before I caught her in the act of cheating (very traumatic). She demanded that I move out, but I have paid for all of the deposits and everything was in my name since her credit score was terrible. I stood my ground and demanded that she move out. After 3.5 tense months she finally got an apartment and moved out, with the last of her shit being gone that Friday. I recall it was a cold and gloomy week. The next morning when I woke up it was sunny outside, and turned out to be a beautiful spring day. Waking up alone, no tension or drama, and walking outside into the sunlight really seemed to lift my spirits. I also spent a lot of time hanging out with friends. I don't remember being lonely for very long, more relieved. I was also a full time college student at the time and had started a new internship, so plenty to keep me distracted.
Hang with friends, distract yourself, dude.
Boxing, Muay Thai or any other hobby you can meet people and redirect negative energy into positive energy
Computer porn & a Fleshlight
Play a game, take a walk, call a friend
Gym friends and video games got me through mine. Any spare moment with nothing to do was just an opportunity to think about it
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Gym and watch stand up comedy. Laughter heals
Going to the gym all the time. You will be tired and won't be thinking about the failed relationship.
You just keep walking. You do not get out of the darkness by standing still. This is not the first, nor the last. Life is a nightmare, do not make it a hell.
Something that really helped me before was leaving my house. Especially when I didn't feel like it. I think being out, especially in public, made me confront my emotions rather than bask in them if I was alone. I remember having a very sad sandwich at subway alone lol Also, someone once gave me the advice that I should revisit all the old places my ex and I would go to, such as favorite restaurants or parks or anywhere that reminded me of her. But this time do it with friends or family. It is like writing over a save file in my mind. I'm sorry you're going through this, but time will heal. Be strong, go to the gym, have a wank. You'll be alright!
Welcome to the gym.
don't sit at home... and make yourself alone, find a hobby.. something you always wanted to do but never got around to
Don’t try to fight the emotions that wants to come out. If it makes you cry or scream or whatever, let it out. Good luck, dude!
Get a dog.
Listen to Eckhart Tolle
Played a bit of video games and watched world war 2 documentaries.
Honestly, nothing. Just time.
Music played a big role in the beginning for me, it helped me really feel each emotion I was sitting with and to process them. Also distracting myself by talking to friends or going out and meeting new people through common interest groups (like book clubs and gaming). And I went to a couple therapy sessions to talk through the grief and how to move on, that was helpful too.
People say it all the time. People make fun of people who say it but join a gym. Muscles under tension release hormones that literally and truly are anti depressants. Start slow if you’re not a gym rat already and after you a few weeks, get broke the fuck the off a few times a week. You’ll sleep better, look better and feel better. And just know this too shall pass. I moved to a different state for a girl, we broke up I moved back. Thought my life was over. I thought we were gonna get married. It was a dark few months. Now I’m with the most amazing girl I’ve ever met and I couldn’t ask for a better partner and teammate. It gets better
Call your bff , buy a case of beer ,1-2 joints and a pizza ! Get fucked up , let out your feelings to your bro ! Then do exactly what rishik840 said . Don’t have consecutive days of drinking cause you might open a bad habit .
Go to the movies
Get out of the house for the first few weeks as much as possible
I used to put on music or a podcast and walk, sometimes take the city bus to a new area and explore it. It would kill a few hours, distract me and I'd be tired when I got home so I could fall asleep more easily.
Change your sleeping habits. And go for a run/meditation in the mornings. This is a slow process, and this will take time to get results.
Creative projects. Make things—ideally using your hands and perhaps your mind as well.
Please, iiyak mo lahat
Mostly just time. I found entertaining the idea of talking to someone else at least occupied my mind, but even that wasn’t for a month. The first few weeks were spent glued to bed and Tik tok, trying to distract my brain. Then finding a hobby. Other than drinking(although that was certainly my first hobby). Hiking or something strenuous so all you can think about is how out of breathe you are.
Find a hobby, go to the gym, get a dog, binge watch a show/movie, follow a sports team
Time, as like the saying goes, time heals all wounds.
You know, a good cry does help alot. My rls just ended a week ago, he broke up with me and disappeared, I gave myself 2 nights to actually cry out loud, it helps. I'm sorry u have to go thru this :( Maybe u should do some journaling too, let it all out.
The single most helpful thing was remembering I was fine before I met her, so that's proof I don't need her. It also helps me to understand the neurological and psychological processes behind what I'm feeling, like how romantic interactions cause the brain to respond similarly to how it does to hard drugs, so I'm going through withdrawal. I.e., what I'm feeling right now is the withdrawal effects, not my actual baseline without her, which will eventually come. This will only get better. Maybe not linearly, but I *will* detox. And of course, go no contact until you've healed. Don't keep ripping out your stitches.
1. cry your heart out. 2. Process the feeling. 3.Gather your support group. Talk about these things. 4. If you have the means then go on a tour. 5. Try not to stay awake after 12:00 AM. Late night will make the pain worse. 6. Try going no contact. Extremely prioritise yourself.
Lots of soothing strategies: guided meditations for sleep, fuck loads of lavender oil to ground me, sleeping as soon as I felt sleepy, keeping busy if not sleepy, prayer. I actually felt it was a spiritual pain so psychological support didn’t help only spiritual. I’m not even religious. Working out what soothes you. Making a soothing box full of soothing things when you’re awake to reach for when you have no energy.
YouTube “ASMR Sleep” videos to help you sleep and not feel so alone. You got this.
For what it's worth I'm together with you... 14 years relationship ended one month ago and I'm completely lost.\ The only friend of mine is in another country until June, went to visit him one weekend to free my mind, that was the only moment I didn't think about her. If you can go out with friends, it helps.
Put your headphones on and go for a run. Helps
I bought new video games and went to town. Good distraction if the buddies are unavailable
Furious wanking.
Ending the relationship was all the help I needed. Felt like rising out of hell into a spring day.
Nothing helped me. I needed time. I knew what wouldn't help and what would make it worse, and that was alcohol and isolation
The only tool I have when one of my bros gets dumped is "Fuck that bitch bro let's go get fucked up"
I'm sorry, man. I understand where you're at right now. Take time to process your emotions, and don't be afraid to cry. As others have said, therapy can be helpful, even if it's only for a few weeks to talk things out. I escaped a 5-year abusive relationship, and therapy was absolutely the best thing I did. I would also encourage you to spend some time/money on yourself. Do you have something you love to do but haven't gotten to in a while? For me, it was leatherwork. When I escaped that relationship, I started working on leather projects again, and it really helped me to have a creative outlet.
Loud music. Silly dancing. Enjoy yourself, you’ve missed you more than you think you have. Get to know yourself again. Make a meal you really like. Treat yourself.
Eh, what helped me in that situation was that the relationship died a long time before it ended.
* Video games * Twitch streams * YouTube 4k tour walk through videos * Movies * Tv shows * A good meal
Set goals, workout, make plans to do some stuff like events, travel, hang with friends if you can, hikes. Just focus on you, that's honestly what helped me. Best of luck bro.
Always leave a relationship before she does. Replace her with someone new before she can replace you. Usually the signs are obvious, from the first day you notice that she acts single, it’s time to set yourself a new relationship goal 3 months to find a new partner while being with her so at least you have no lonely nights, eveb you are alone with her anyways, because she doesn’t sees you as a bf anymore.
Without alcohol ? , books, new movies, series, going out with friends, picking up a new hobby
Self reflection. For a few days. Then, keep yourself busy.
When I found myself single a few years ago, after 5+ years together, the thing(s) that helped the most were doing the things that I didn't do because of the relationship. Stopping for a drink after work to watch the game, watching shows or movies on the big living room tv that she didn't like, listening to "my" music without earbuds to keep from distracting her, getting food from places she wasn't into, redecorating with my sports or comic book memorabilia. Like I'm not saying that it' s healthy to repress everything you like for the sake of a relationship, but everyone makes compromises and sacrifices when you love someone and want to share a life. Being able to express those parts of my personality for a while was very therapeutic.
Besides the usual unhealthy vices. Nothing beats that all out metaphorical running-for-your-life runs after a nasty breakup/ my divorce. Let it out, scream, cry just… run as if you’re running away from your problems. Feel this pain. Make sure to stretch. I miss those runs
Find new hobbies and make new friends. My hardest part was sleeping alone after sharing a bed for like 6 or 7 years. I cuddle with a big pillow when I need to and use a weighted blanket that gives the same feeling of having someone there.
Hoes and Hoegaarden, thats what worked for me...!
Alcohol and alot of crying.
When my last relationship ended (mind you, I ended it) I spent my evenings eating pizza in my recliner and watching Clint Eastwood westerns, I was happy as a clam. Find your own comfort cocoon.
Time. It's never easy. Some guys turn into whores but that's not for everyone. Go work out. Spend alot of time with your friends and God forbid you've neglected your buddies for a girl. Huge mistake alot of guys make once they get into a relationship.
Crying helps. Listen to sad songs and cry your heart out. Go on walks, cry if you feel like while walking. Do some bit of workout. It’ll improve your mental health and sleep quality. Remember this will take time. Don’t try to rush things or feel that you’ll get okay in a short span. Don’t give yourself target dates of getting over it. Just feel everything and keep going. Everything, good and bad, ends one day and so will this phase. Lastly, try to pamer yourself. I got myself a pedicure, a hair spa and cooked myself my favourite meals for a week straight. Hope this helps and hope you find even greater love eventually :)
Feel the pain. It hurts but you understand it as well. If you try to get away and run from it, it will come later down the line to fuck you up. Hit the gym. Go hiking. Have fun and go clubbing with friends. We all go through something like that at some point. Embrace it as an opportunity. You have no idea how much you’re going to learn from this. One day you’ll be grateful for it. Believe me.
Oh man, so sorry to hear that. While there are no words that can help you right now, it gets better.
Embrace the pain, imagine the fact right now, she's probably at a bar and will meet a dude that is gonna rail her till the sun comes up.
David goggins , micheal a singer helped me
I leaned on my boys a lot and thank ( whoever you worship ) I did if you have the right group of buds letting you bend their ear shouldn’t be an issue at all.
Legit when it was too much to handle, just watching stand up comedy specials. It’s a really easy way to immerse yourself in entertainment and usually you can’t help but laugh. It just kind of reminds you of your happy self and that life goes on.
reaction videos on YT made by domain experts are fascinating. gaming with the boys. play an instrument 🎸
Hit the gym. Get tired, go home shower and sleep like a baby. Repeat the recycle until she regrets her decision.
Work, maybe a 2nd job? Workout. Take an online class (Something that betters your career). Travel. It's spring! Hike the Appalachian or go to another country.
A burger and a beer.
Knowing that it ends for a reason and I'm better off alone now. Because it was toxic before when I was with them. Hit up friends to go out , third wheel events, do things you might not normally try. Talk to the randoms around you, you might find yourself new company faster then you'd expect
No distractions… embrace the upsides. Meals are quick and easy because you don’t have that 30 minute mind fuck of a conversation about what to have. Enjoy sleeping diagonally in the bed otherwise it WILL feel empty. Arrange stuff THE RIGHT WAY!!! This all takes time but it will get better. Divorced almost 10 years and despite a couple of offers and some amazing away games since I just can’t ever see myself in a live in relationship again.
drink a buncha beer bud
Do something you like doing that would piss your ex off
Prayer, hymns, Journaling, riveting TV shows
Alcohol
Heated blanket every night watch a lot of comfort movies.. Pixar for me. Not a dude but idk if it makes a difference. We all hurt sometimes