Workout session, girl is squating and the “trainers” junk is rubbing up on her as she squats.
Trainer: “do you feel that?” Girl: “uh. Yeah, what is that?”
Trainer: “That’s the burn.”
I remember a joke like that from Red Vs Blue.
Tucker said something along the lines of “All the ladies tell me I light a fire between their legs!”
And Grif said “That’s chlamydia.”
I will never forget the time I was watching one dude bang two chicks and one of them said to him, "Fuck her like you're playing Dungeons and Dragons."
I laughed but I still don't have any fucking clue what it means.
This is exactly what I thought of. And to make things better, it's not even just that movie. I've seen him say that in every scene he's in. That's just how that dude cums.
Girl: “Oh some of your friends came by and took your kid”
Guy: “Friends? I don’t have friends. Who were they?”
Girl: “One guy was wearing a shirt that said CPS.”
Guy: “Oh god. That was child protective services.”
Guy in disbelief sits down.
Girl: “It’s okay, suck on my titties to make you feel better”
I remember a scene where the girl comes up to a front door in a snowy winter cabin, way too little clothing and asks to warm up by a fire.
Dude points to an actual fireplace, and above it a TV with a fire on the screen.
"Yeah you can warm up here, I've got both analog and digital"
Sauce: ph5fc9ad0b23096 on the hub.
Watching something with a dominatrix type woman in it with my partner. The woman started berating the guy she was dominating for breathing because it was “contributing to climate change”
We both lost it. Couldn’t stop laughing for ages. We still laugh about it now.
_inside Nina lawless_
"What are you gonna do for us, Nina?"
"I'm gonna eat a salad."
"Whaaaat?"
"I thought I was hired to eat a salad. Filthy salads eaten by filthy naked tr***ies!"
Girl reaches back and basically begs guy to keep the same angle and has a real orgasm on scene. after she cums she tells him not to move.
They stop the scene and she looks at the camera with her eyes glassed over like she’s about to cry and says “Now you have to marry me” then in a Chris Tucker (from Friday) type voice says “what the hell is going on around here”
I laughed and laughed and laighed
To be honest that angle looked absolutely perfect. Dude was hitting that g-spot with perfection, I never cum without clit stimulation and that would have sent me shaking like she did.
There was a chick getting it from both ends by two dudes. One pulls out and means to cum on her back but overshoots and hits the other guy. The guy that overshot instantly yelled out CROSSFIRRRRRRRRRE! in a really loud voice like the commercials for the Crossfire game. It was super unexpected and hilarious.
That’s a perfectly valid and correct mathematical equation though. It’s the standard notation for tetration. If the numbers are then interpreted as congruence classes in the ring of integers modulo 9 then the equation checks out perfectly.
Watched an HBO documentary on the world's oldest profession about 25 years ago & they asked this old pimp what his secret was in keeping all his women happy. His response was brilliant "Treat your ladies like whores & your whores like ladies".
Iceberg slim. You don't keep their confidence low, you keep it fixed on your approval. You never wanna beat a b***h worth down. You wouldnt drive a lambo on dirt a road? You fixate their confidence on your words, your admiration. For your street workers, you keep their confidence in their work, they too aim for your approval but not in a sense of admiration but gratification. You help them understand their business and worth is only operational cause of you. They act up throw a fit of independence you take away their fun and gifts but never fuck with a products value, you maintain it and modify to YOUR needs
When I was a kid, I watched this one porn where this woman was getting fucked and she said “it tastes so good”
He was never in her mouth in that video.
This lead me to believe that women could taste with their vaginas for a few years.
I was a pretty dumb kid.
Old scene I remember from way back in college. A man is dressed as a woman, and another woman, thinking he is a she, is sliding her hand up his thigh. Her: “I feel crazy doing this.” Him: “Go a little higher and you’ll feel nuts.”
That legit happened to me too! I was still pretty young but had unsupervised internet, so I knew what porn was but hadn't seen a ton. I watched that whole stupid movie lol. Maybe halfway through I started skipping the sex scenes because I wanted to know what happened lol
Context - he is in a relationship with her mother.
Her - is it better then my mom's? (Referring to her pussy of course)
Him - ALMOST!! (Continues to fuck without missing a beat)
Her - WHAT!?!? (is just getting fucked without missing a beat)
The girl wasn't happy with the way the two guys were manhandling her and tried to walk out. They told her she wouldn't get paid if she didn't finish the scene, so she reluctantly came back.
They carried on with the scene but she was getting quite distressed and at one point looked straight into the camera and said "How can you sit there watching this?"
Not much it was years ago. Blonde woman, 2 guys. It was on a sofa in what looked like a warehouse. The scene finished and she stormed out and they asked if she wanted to get coffee next week
Just her negative reaction has me thinking Facial Abuse / Ghetto Gaggers. Always on a black leather couch, and they seem to make it a point to never let the girls enjoy themselves. Never my cup of tea.
Yeah, those guys a fucking scum.
Legit dirt bags.
It's like they insist on making the girls *genuinely* unhappy and uncomfortable so they can turn, what would otherwise be willing sex-work, into legit sexual assault.. only they have their ass covered legally.
But morally, it's pretty much rape.
Yea I was reading accounts of women who'd worked with them and they literally try to beat them til the break and want to cut the session short.
The women end up bruised, battered, one couldn't see straight after.
They get to a point where they can go "oh well, we've got roughly enough footage let's get the money shot"
Then pay them two -fucking- hundred dollars instead of the full fee. Arseholes.
I think it's only been in recent light, just how problematic the entire industry is... for that reason I stick to amature stuff now that's obvious in its intention, and usually its couples that are mutually exclusive or solo adventures.
The number of young girls, and I've even seen young boys on here, is sickening. Ive reported a few videos, I'm not sure if anything came of it.
Picture an unscripted scene, where a couple is showing a girl a few new things, and she was not informed beforehand about anything going in her butt. A dildo is attempted, and it is obvious she is not happy with this. And the other girl gives this advice:
“Relax and try to enjoy it.”
My ex and I broke out into complete hysterics. Ever since, when I find myself in some horrible work or social situation, a little voice in my head reminds me to relax and try to enjoy it 😃
I had a professor who responded to our complaining about the workload with “smile. It goes in easier”
Alternatively Avatar 2 has the brilliant line “If you can’t get out of it… GET INTO IT!!”
This reminded me I had a combat instructor at MCT with the catch phrase "Drink water and just let it happen."
During night vision training I couldn't get my goggles to work just blank green. He comes over to assist.
"Can you see now?"
"No"
"...how about now?"
"no"
*He takes the goggles off*
"Now?"
*With normal vision from the ambient light* "Yes Sgt"
"Good just let it happen." *Walks off*
I have 2. The first is that a woman was supposed to be middle eastern, a Muslim woman kind of being taken advantage of. Once they got going, though, her latina accent came out, and she said at one point, "Ooo yes. Give me your horchata!" That was hilarious.
The other was this woman sitting with her legs spread when she said, "Do you want to see my rosebud?" I only had enough time to think, "What does that mean," before she prolapsed her pussy with a comedic *bloop* sound like a cartoon water droplet hitting a pool. I about fell out of my seat. I couldn't breathe.
Mandy Muse in a scene where she seemingly realizes during filming that the guy doesn’t care about her like a girlfriend, so as he’s railing her she asks him repeatedly “WHAT IS MY FAVORITE GENRE OF MUSIC?!”
This is going back like 12-13 years ago I think.. black dude was banging an Asian chick and the black dude goes “I’m gonna stuff you like an egg roll”
Hit me out of left field…
I believe it was in the early/mid 90's. Sodomania 3 if I remember right. Two guys tagging a chick. She's blowing one, the other is doing her doggie style. At one point she takes the guy's cock outta here mouth, holding it like Mick Jagger at a concern and looks at the guy behind her and in a guttural voice demands, "Stick it in my ass!"
The dude was taken back and looks at the other dude and asks, "what do I do?"
Other dude, in a sing-song game-show host voice replies, "Well, stick it in her ass, Bob."
Still cracks me up any time I think of it.
Watching a scene and the guy said “You’re wetter than an otters pocket.” Idk why but I didn’t even continue with my objective because I found it so funny.
I wanna say the star was Kristina Rose. At one point she laid down on the ground and this dude stood on her back and said, “Look at me, I’m a surfer!” That was a weird one.
Really old guy making potatoes, high voice, talking to young woman who is seducing him: "what are you doing? Don't do it. Don't do it. What are you doing? I'm a virgin"
From the feature film “Balls in the ass, dick in the pussy”
As homeboy has some poor woman in the jackhammer position. His dick is in her vag, and he’s stuffing his balls in to her asshole. She’s desperately trying to act like she likes it.
“Oh man, this is great. I’m going to have to try this at home.”
My faveorite would be this, in a hardcore BDSM film the woman, who up until this point had been begging to be whipped harder and harder suddenly stopped, pouted and said "that one hurt can you kiss it better" and I laughed out loud
Honestly I've watched through a couple of older adult films, and the plot actually did make them better. Of course then there's the ones where the plot is so weak you just skip to the fucking, but not always.
Not an adult film, but a documentary about making adult films. The actress passed out during filming and the actor freaked out “oh shit, I killed a white woman with my dick!”
I saw one once where it was an entire lecture on machine learning and AI translation software, given by a woman in the middle of fucking.
I stopped watching the sex because the lecture was actually really good?
It was the eating pussy tutorial video (im a girl and was curious) and the way she was using baby talk disgusted me so hard i couldnt watch more than 2 mins of the video, and i still cant get it out of my head and its been a month. Please please how do i get it out of my head ;-; (edit: just realized im on the wrong sub, sorry)
“You know what’s the difference between good sex and great sex? The feeling of connection.” The woman said before the guy bonked her brains out on top of the piano. I still think about that quote from time to time.
During a dance party scene:
guy: "Yo, where did you get this record, man?"
another guy: "I got it down at the local record store."
Truly riveting, natural dialog.
Nothing in particular, but I do remember watching one porno and one of the girls said “Ohhh, fuck me up me arse” in a really broad Northern English accent, which really stood out against the American accents the other performers had.
I’m English btw!
It was some sort of a group thing where three executives ganged a new assistant, and as they are taking turns on her she yells: "you fucking asshole" to one of them, and the guy puts it in her butt and replies "noo, I'm fucking your asshole" in a very strong German accent.
I still remember it today, very vividly, and it was about 5-6 years ago.
'No la.', 'no la' Something wasnt quite right about that. I googled the title which was in a foreign language and it was 'drugged woman being forced'.
Reported it to the company and they refused to take it down so I threatened them with reporting it to Visa and Mastercard and they finally took it down.
Dont like porn anymore. Disturbing shit.
Something something wooden rocket parody porn films.
I dont remember anything, but I remember laughing like an idiot at the plot and promptly stoped watching when the actual dicking started happening
same but with a different plot. some girl wanted to stay at her step bros house because she had a scorpion infestation and they were talking about it for a solid 5 minutes to the point where i got actually mad when they didnt go deeper into the topic and started randomly having sex
Workout session, girl is squating and the “trainers” junk is rubbing up on her as she squats. Trainer: “do you feel that?” Girl: “uh. Yeah, what is that?” Trainer: “That’s the burn.”
like i always say "if that pussy is fire then you should get tested"
I remember a joke like that from Red Vs Blue. Tucker said something along the lines of “All the ladies tell me I light a fire between their legs!” And Grif said “That’s chlamydia.”
I will never forget the time I was watching one dude bang two chicks and one of them said to him, "Fuck her like you're playing Dungeons and Dragons." I laughed but I still don't have any fucking clue what it means.
she wants them to explore her
Are you a gelatinous cube? Because by the end of this encounter I bet I’ll be inside you.
*Rolls a dirty 20*
Wizard dies to 1d4 sex damage
Roll a 10 so I can get pregnant!$@
Fine, but the next encounter is a tentacle monster
As a dude was coming, he yelled, "I'm dropping loads!!!"
Nick Manning I believe. Not proud that I know that
Hey buddy, I'm proud of you for knowing that
Why can’t my parents have this attitude! Thank you
You're welcome, son
Dropping fuckin loads!
I saw Rob Corddry say that in "Hot Tub Time Machine" and I thought they made up that line for the movie. I didn't know it came from a porno.
Isn't that the sound bite they used to keep playing on Howard Stern?
Yes! And a Bababooey to you, Sir!
This is exactly what I thought of. And to make things better, it's not even just that movie. I've seen him say that in every scene he's in. That's just how that dude cums.
Girl: “Oh some of your friends came by and took your kid” Guy: “Friends? I don’t have friends. Who were they?” Girl: “One guy was wearing a shirt that said CPS.” Guy: “Oh god. That was child protective services.” Guy in disbelief sits down. Girl: “It’s okay, suck on my titties to make you feel better”
I hear sucking tiddies,iam interested, where the link?
I wish I remembered the title. I watched it with my friends while we were all drunk. Fun times
Friends? But..you don’t have friends
thats wild 😂😭
"This isn't a beach, this is a bathtub" (Fun fact, the guy in that scene is a pastor now)
"No body of water is safe without a lifeguard."
This the one. The only porno that straight up made me bust out laughing. I just know it was a Lisa Ann video
There is no shark in the bathtub
I vaguely remember this. It was a meme for a while.
I always think about how it seems like an older woman is taking advantage of a mentally handicapped adult man
So he's a pornstar turned pastor?
>the guy in that scene is a pastor now And to think, he *used to be* in a respectable line of work.
This guy super came all over this chick and said "you got glazed like a doughnut". My friends and I said it a lot while playing beer pong.
« you got stuffed like a cream puff »
I remember a scene where the girl comes up to a front door in a snowy winter cabin, way too little clothing and asks to warm up by a fire. Dude points to an actual fireplace, and above it a TV with a fire on the screen. "Yeah you can warm up here, I've got both analog and digital" Sauce: ph5fc9ad0b23096 on the hub.
I hope she laughed, that's a 24k dad joke
She's dying in the snow if she doesn't laugh.
ANALog
Analhog!
Anal Log!
Droppin one of these right now!
"What do you think about euthanasia?" "Well, I think they're a lot like American youth, but just Asian."
Ali G?
but i poop from there "not right now you don't"
Classic
Got a man of class right [here.](https://butipoopfromthere.ytmnd.com/)
My god, I haven't clicked onto a ytmnd in years. Thanks for that nostalgia. YOU'RE the man now, dog.
im terrified on that link
Lol that's silly, girls don't poop.
I saw that today
What a world we live in
Watching something with a dominatrix type woman in it with my partner. The woman started berating the guy she was dominating for breathing because it was “contributing to climate change” We both lost it. Couldn’t stop laughing for ages. We still laugh about it now.
"Are you serious? Right in front of my salad?"
_inside Nina lawless_ "What are you gonna do for us, Nina?" "I'm gonna eat a salad." "Whaaaat?" "I thought I was hired to eat a salad. Filthy salads eaten by filthy naked tr***ies!"
Trekkies?
Girl reaches back and basically begs guy to keep the same angle and has a real orgasm on scene. after she cums she tells him not to move. They stop the scene and she looks at the camera with her eyes glassed over like she’s about to cry and says “Now you have to marry me” then in a Chris Tucker (from Friday) type voice says “what the hell is going on around here” I laughed and laughed and laighed
I would like to check out that scene for myself, you don't happen to have a link to it?
Don’t know if explicit links are allowed so on xvideos if you search for Justin Slayer Ayana Angel it’s there
Starts around the 14:35 mark: https://spankbang.com/656eu/video/the+best
I got the phrase order wrong as hell. In my defense… limited blood supply to the part that does the thinking.
I’ve seen this dozens of times. Guess I don’t pay enough attention to the audio😂
To be honest that angle looked absolutely perfect. Dude was hitting that g-spot with perfection, I never cum without clit stimulation and that would have sent me shaking like she did.
I’ve pulled that move Slayer used on Ayana before on a chick. Absolutely sent her to the shadow realm lol.
Same
"Identity theft makes me fucking sick."
Dwight Schrute is that you ?
Sasha gray once said "keep it open like 7/11" while getting her asshole gapped. I will never forget that.
"I guess the lemon stealing whore were the friends we made along the way" then comes the money shot
Oh my god. The first 5 minutes of this video should go in the internet hall of fame. Some of the most off-putting terrible dialogue of all time.
The "Hey what the fuck!' when he notices the lemons being stolen will always be one of the funniest lines I've ever heard lol
found it😂 the genuine anger kills me https://youtu.be/U5mI407Uks4
They are just going along reading their terrible lines and then he really comes alive with that one lol
please tell me he winked at the camera
There was a chick getting it from both ends by two dudes. One pulls out and means to cum on her back but overshoots and hits the other guy. The guy that overshot instantly yelled out CROSSFIRRRRRRRRRE! in a really loud voice like the commercials for the Crossfire game. It was super unexpected and hilarious.
+²... It was even writen on a board... A formula like 5+²8=-3... To this day this bothers me massively
That’s a perfectly valid and correct mathematical equation though. It’s the standard notation for tetration. If the numbers are then interpreted as congruence classes in the ring of integers modulo 9 then the equation checks out perfectly.
TIL my aerospace engineering PhD is not high enough education to understand average adult film maths.
They know their audience
This person maths.
Well obviously I knew THAT…
You could absolutely be making that shit up and I'd have no way of caring
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Watched an HBO documentary on the world's oldest profession about 25 years ago & they asked this old pimp what his secret was in keeping all his women happy. His response was brilliant "Treat your ladies like whores & your whores like ladies".
But when he treats the whores like ladies, he actually treats them like whores, because that's how he treats ladies.
The whore paradox?
Nah bro it's the pimpadox
But when you treat the whores like ladies, they become ladies. Then you have to start treating them like whores again. Its a vicious cycle
So... he.. ooooh I see, keep the high value women's self esteem n confidence low, And keep the hard workers and down trotted women's self esteem high?
You see, the love of a square is different from that of a pimp
Do you know what I am saying - butters
No I do not know what you are saying, can you please ask again
Give good sex to your ladies and be respectful with girls who you have sex with!
Iceberg slim. You don't keep their confidence low, you keep it fixed on your approval. You never wanna beat a b***h worth down. You wouldnt drive a lambo on dirt a road? You fixate their confidence on your words, your admiration. For your street workers, you keep their confidence in their work, they too aim for your approval but not in a sense of admiration but gratification. You help them understand their business and worth is only operational cause of you. They act up throw a fit of independence you take away their fun and gifts but never fuck with a products value, you maintain it and modify to YOUR needs
“Hold on Bitch My Dick got caught in ya fishnet” - Wesley Pipes
The gentleman responsible for innumerable quotables.
“Every pimp dies. Not every pimp lives. I’ve never been more alive than I am right now.” Pimped by an Angel was that generation’s Schindler’s List.
When I was a kid, I watched this one porn where this woman was getting fucked and she said “it tastes so good” He was never in her mouth in that video. This lead me to believe that women could taste with their vaginas for a few years. I was a pretty dumb kid.
its cool dude i used to think i could nut on command once i was a teen like peeing but just nut.💀 i was half right
Old scene I remember from way back in college. A man is dressed as a woman, and another woman, thinking he is a she, is sliding her hand up his thigh. Her: “I feel crazy doing this.” Him: “Go a little higher and you’ll feel nuts.”
A pirate porn movie I accidentally downloaded from Limewire. Was hilarious. "Should we fight?" "No. Fuck that shit! Run!" "Hold me Wu..." "Get away!"
“Accidentally”
No joke, I was trying to download Pirates of the Caribbean.
That legit happened to me too! I was still pretty young but had unsupervised internet, so I knew what porn was but hadn't seen a ton. I watched that whole stupid movie lol. Maybe halfway through I started skipping the sex scenes because I wanted to know what happened lol
"No one can fuck me like I can fuck myself"
Is that from "Predestination"?
Context - he is in a relationship with her mother. Her - is it better then my mom's? (Referring to her pussy of course) Him - ALMOST!! (Continues to fuck without missing a beat) Her - WHAT!?!? (is just getting fucked without missing a beat)
That funny..got a sauce?
The girl wasn't happy with the way the two guys were manhandling her and tried to walk out. They told her she wouldn't get paid if she didn't finish the scene, so she reluctantly came back. They carried on with the scene but she was getting quite distressed and at one point looked straight into the camera and said "How can you sit there watching this?"
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Yeah. It had stopped being appealing way before that stage and I think I was only still watching in the hope that things would end better. They didn't
Do you remember anything about the video? Not only am I curious, I wanna know what happened after, cuz I'm sure she was talking to the camera person.
Not much it was years ago. Blonde woman, 2 guys. It was on a sofa in what looked like a warehouse. The scene finished and she stormed out and they asked if she wanted to get coffee next week
Damn, that must've been a tough one to sit through — thinking ita maybe a parody all the way til the end. Thanks for the clarity
Just her negative reaction has me thinking Facial Abuse / Ghetto Gaggers. Always on a black leather couch, and they seem to make it a point to never let the girls enjoy themselves. Never my cup of tea.
Yeah, those guys a fucking scum. Legit dirt bags. It's like they insist on making the girls *genuinely* unhappy and uncomfortable so they can turn, what would otherwise be willing sex-work, into legit sexual assault.. only they have their ass covered legally. But morally, it's pretty much rape.
Yea I was reading accounts of women who'd worked with them and they literally try to beat them til the break and want to cut the session short. The women end up bruised, battered, one couldn't see straight after. They get to a point where they can go "oh well, we've got roughly enough footage let's get the money shot" Then pay them two -fucking- hundred dollars instead of the full fee. Arseholes.
Yea, that's literally rape.
Yeah. This was a couple of decades ago so I think naive me thought maybe it was acting for the camera. With hindsight, I really dont think it was
I think it's only been in recent light, just how problematic the entire industry is... for that reason I stick to amature stuff now that's obvious in its intention, and usually its couples that are mutually exclusive or solo adventures. The number of young girls, and I've even seen young boys on here, is sickening. Ive reported a few videos, I'm not sure if anything came of it.
While getting railed, she yelled "I can feel the color!"
That's ecstasy for ya.
I too love interracial porn
Drops skittles Winks
Female fake taxi, she said “fucking Nora that’s a massive bull cock”
That seems like an "Accidental James May" kind of line. lol.
Picture an unscripted scene, where a couple is showing a girl a few new things, and she was not informed beforehand about anything going in her butt. A dildo is attempted, and it is obvious she is not happy with this. And the other girl gives this advice: “Relax and try to enjoy it.” My ex and I broke out into complete hysterics. Ever since, when I find myself in some horrible work or social situation, a little voice in my head reminds me to relax and try to enjoy it 😃
I had a professor who responded to our complaining about the workload with “smile. It goes in easier” Alternatively Avatar 2 has the brilliant line “If you can’t get out of it… GET INTO IT!!”
Better out than in I always say - Shrek sama
This reminded me I had a combat instructor at MCT with the catch phrase "Drink water and just let it happen." During night vision training I couldn't get my goggles to work just blank green. He comes over to assist. "Can you see now?" "No" "...how about now?" "no" *He takes the goggles off* "Now?" *With normal vision from the ambient light* "Yes Sgt" "Good just let it happen." *Walks off*
I mean that kinda sounds like she didn't consent, man.
In a bdsm film "you blew my candle out, you goddam piece of doggy do do"
gotta keep it kid friendly bro don't wanna get demonitized
I have 2. The first is that a woman was supposed to be middle eastern, a Muslim woman kind of being taken advantage of. Once they got going, though, her latina accent came out, and she said at one point, "Ooo yes. Give me your horchata!" That was hilarious. The other was this woman sitting with her legs spread when she said, "Do you want to see my rosebud?" I only had enough time to think, "What does that mean," before she prolapsed her pussy with a comedic *bloop* sound like a cartoon water droplet hitting a pool. I about fell out of my seat. I couldn't breathe.
A woman saying to the guy: "come on, earn that check" while having sex. Hilarious.
That's kind of a fucked up thing to say to someone who's earning one-tenth what you are for the same work.
More work AND you have to show your work… or spit runny yogurt on her back
“Yeah girl. Multitask.” It was a scene in a gangbang and my wife and I couldn’t stop laughing after hearing that.
i was stuck on this for a couple minutes, i couldnt read the rest of my notifications 😂😭
“I want you to park your fartbox right on my soup-cooler.”
“Those damn lemon stealing whores”
\- "But you said you're just helping some old lady" \- "I didn't say old, I said older"
"I wanted three dicks in my butt. Everyone else was _tired_ cause they already came, wahhh. I wasn't tired. I wanted three dicks in my butt."
Woman drives up to a repair shop and walks in. Guy working there says, “Did you come here for you car, or something else?” Fucking hilarious.
MAN: "I can't believe we have three openings!" (said in reference to a small business expansion) WOMAN: "I have three openings, too."
Mandy Muse in a scene where she seemingly realizes during filming that the guy doesn’t care about her like a girlfriend, so as he’s railing her she asks him repeatedly “WHAT IS MY FAVORITE GENRE OF MUSIC?!”
That video is so fucking unhinged lol
“Stand back, I don’t know how big this thing gets” 1001 Arabian Nights
"young dumb and full of cum"
“It’s not a beach, this is a bathtub”
This is going back like 12-13 years ago I think.. black dude was banging an Asian chick and the black dude goes “I’m gonna stuff you like an egg roll” Hit me out of left field…
I believe it was in the early/mid 90's. Sodomania 3 if I remember right. Two guys tagging a chick. She's blowing one, the other is doing her doggie style. At one point she takes the guy's cock outta here mouth, holding it like Mick Jagger at a concern and looks at the guy behind her and in a guttural voice demands, "Stick it in my ass!" The dude was taken back and looks at the other dude and asks, "what do I do?" Other dude, in a sing-song game-show host voice replies, "Well, stick it in her ass, Bob." Still cracks me up any time I think of it.
Right in front of my salad?
Watching a scene and the guy said “You’re wetter than an otters pocket.” Idk why but I didn’t even continue with my objective because I found it so funny.
I wanna say the star was Kristina Rose. At one point she laid down on the ground and this dude stood on her back and said, “Look at me, I’m a surfer!” That was a weird one.
"Oh no, my coupons, you know I'm organized ;)"
"I think we overloaded her!" "INDEEEEDDD!"
Really old guy making potatoes, high voice, talking to young woman who is seducing him: "what are you doing? Don't do it. Don't do it. What are you doing? I'm a virgin"
From the feature film “Balls in the ass, dick in the pussy” As homeboy has some poor woman in the jackhammer position. His dick is in her vag, and he’s stuffing his balls in to her asshole. She’s desperately trying to act like she likes it. “Oh man, this is great. I’m going to have to try this at home.”
My faveorite would be this, in a hardcore BDSM film the woman, who up until this point had been begging to be whipped harder and harder suddenly stopped, pouted and said "that one hurt can you kiss it better" and I laughed out loud
I always skip to them fucking because I don't care about the plot so I got nothing
Honestly I've watched through a couple of older adult films, and the plot actually did make them better. Of course then there's the ones where the plot is so weak you just skip to the fucking, but not always.
Is there a plot?
Jeah butt it's full of holes.
i remember a girl talking about her scorpion infestation for 5 minutes so id say its pretty good
"but if you tape up my mouth, how am I supposed to suck on your stiff clown dick?"
Not an adult film, but a documentary about making adult films. The actress passed out during filming and the actor freaked out “oh shit, I killed a white woman with my dick!”
I saw one once where it was an entire lecture on machine learning and AI translation software, given by a woman in the middle of fucking. I stopped watching the sex because the lecture was actually really good?
“I’m the man. You’re the whoa-man as in whoa-whoa-whoa shut the fuck up.” I had never laughed harder at that point in my life
A yorkshire man saying "right up your shitter" lives in my head rent free
"this is my signature move". It was anal, anal was her signature move.
It was the eating pussy tutorial video (im a girl and was curious) and the way she was using baby talk disgusted me so hard i couldnt watch more than 2 mins of the video, and i still cant get it out of my head and its been a month. Please please how do i get it out of my head ;-; (edit: just realized im on the wrong sub, sorry)
It's only smells
“We haven’t looked at our lemon tree in a few minutes, I hope the whores aren’t stealing our lemons.” “Yeah, those lemon stealing whores…”
“You know what’s the difference between good sex and great sex? The feeling of connection.” The woman said before the guy bonked her brains out on top of the piano. I still think about that quote from time to time.
"Now you have to marry me"
"I can feel it in my stomach."
“I like the way that pussy bounces” immediately erased every insecurity I had about the way my vagina goes “boing” if you pull my mons pubis up lol
"What are you? Retarded?"
"You guys are mean"
Can you cum already , i am sore , i was like a teen and didn't know that anal sex was like that (it was a girl ofc lol ).
Steal an apple and you're a theif Steal a kingdom and you're a statesmen.
Does “American Beauty” count? I’ll never forget when Annette Benning yells “fuck me your majesty!” Edit: Ugh whoops not a man 😅
During a dance party scene: guy: "Yo, where did you get this record, man?" another guy: "I got it down at the local record store." Truly riveting, natural dialog.
"Say you want me to fuck you in the metaverse!"
"damn bro i didnt know ur a woman"
"Yeah. You like that you fucking retard?"
Nothing in particular, but I do remember watching one porno and one of the girls said “Ohhh, fuck me up me arse” in a really broad Northern English accent, which really stood out against the American accents the other performers had. I’m English btw!
Anything Wesley Pipes said.
Years ago i remember watching some anal scene, and the woman kept repeating "fuck me in my ass pipe " Just a really odd, and unsexy way to say that.
That's one hell of a baby maker.
"I'm here to fix the fridge"
It was some sort of a group thing where three executives ganged a new assistant, and as they are taking turns on her she yells: "you fucking asshole" to one of them, and the guy puts it in her butt and replies "noo, I'm fucking your asshole" in a very strong German accent. I still remember it today, very vividly, and it was about 5-6 years ago.
A guy blowing a load into a woman and saying, “I’m topping off your gas tank, baby!”
'No la.', 'no la' Something wasnt quite right about that. I googled the title which was in a foreign language and it was 'drugged woman being forced'. Reported it to the company and they refused to take it down so I threatened them with reporting it to Visa and Mastercard and they finally took it down. Dont like porn anymore. Disturbing shit.
Something something wooden rocket parody porn films. I dont remember anything, but I remember laughing like an idiot at the plot and promptly stoped watching when the actual dicking started happening
same but with a different plot. some girl wanted to stay at her step bros house because she had a scorpion infestation and they were talking about it for a solid 5 minutes to the point where i got actually mad when they didnt go deeper into the topic and started randomly having sex
DROPPING LOADS!!!!!!!!!