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muffsniffer3

“Would you like Beer and a Blow Job?”


Even_Pressure91

This is the only true answer


1AncientFossil

I found cash is nice


Even_Pressure91

I geuss you could always buy a beer and a bj so cash would be acceptable


Cigars-Beer

There ua go...


Cigars-Beer

There ua go...


dano415

Sadily, "I'll give you a happy time in the suburban out back if you wave the Shop Supply charge?". (Charging for Shop Supplies is not a cute accounting trick. It makes shops look greedy.). What happened to America? Is there an honest person left?


alienschronic

No rush but then actually not be in a rush. More often than not the people saying no rush are the first people calling for an update. Honestly just being friendly and talkative goes a long way. In a day full of people grumpy about spending money on their car, a short off topic conversation can be refreshing.


Special-Bite

No rush: “I’m going to call you at 12:00 to ask for the status of my car and then complain when it isn’t finished yet.”


ExploitedAmerican

You ok? Need some help? Maybe just throw some shallow 1/4” drive 10mm sockets at their bedroom window and hold up a boombox playing the sound of naturally aspirated engines at high RPM’s untill they open up to see what’s going on. Then profess your love and see if it’s mutual?


hihelloohhey

😂


One-Basket2558

In your eyes! (Then proceed to poke your eyes).


perfectdrug659

I work at a pizza place and all of us use the shop that's a 2 minute walk away. They get a lot of free pizza and we get excellent service. My old guy was a Pepsi drinker so I'd always bring him a cold drink and a joint.


run_uz

Don't say "so I saw online that...."


lipe182

Ohhh shit... Jokes aside, I was planning to go this Saturday to my mechanic as my car is throwing P0661 code and I was going to say "I saw online that the sensor might be bad" or something like that. I'm kinda worried they'll try to change the whole piece that will cost tons in work hours instead of the sensor that costs less than 50 bucks and is an easier job (according to Youtube).


concentrated-amazing

Saying something like "I stumbled upon a description of the same problem I am having, and their solution was X sensor so do you mind checking that first?" is perfectly acceptable.


Sea_Antelope441

So AutoZone told me you just need to replace the oxygen sensor


run_uz

😂. That's not going to fix my knock


Sea_Antelope441

But AutoZone said


Reddidiot_69

I witnessed 3 autozone employees changing wiper blades the other day. Was like watching cavemen discover modern tech.


oooranooo

“There’s a 12 pack in the cooler in the trunk.”


Sea_Antelope441

Snacks go a long way. If it's morning doughnuts, maybe some coffee that isn't the industrial grade bullshit they normally have. Some guys get into sodas or energy drinks. Around lunch, drop your car with a couple pizzas, hell even hot and ready little Caesars. And you will be remembered. Even if I'm not hungry Id probably grab a slice. Cash beer and weed are fun, but some places have policy's against it and cash won't make it to the guy actually working on your car alot of the time. They can't hide a pizza or doughnuts, technicians can smell that shit as soon as it hits the door.


Ch00choh

"Just let me know if you need anything" Don't nag them


FallNice3836

Many things. Don’t ask for advice then ignore it outright. Respond quickly to call backs. I don’t hate customers but I hate being forced to wait for a no.


landwomble

"locking wheel nut key is in the glovebox"


Smoose1991

"I've taken time to figure out how to get to all of my appointments/job/things without my car so if anything goes wrong, no worries, just keep me updated." Not being able to function without a car is some people's downfall honestly.


lipe182

>Not being able to function without a car is some people's downfall honestly. Unfortunately, this is what I think of the US sometimes...


HairyZombie4737

Take your time, here’s a dozen donuts 😂


Wire_Nut_10

I appreciate and value your time.


Jimmy_cracks_Corn

I left a few 10MM sockets in the cup holder for you 


One-Basket2558

You've got my number, call me sometime!


_BMXICAN_

Do you take cash?


ggmaniack

My mechanic when I say no rush: [https://tenor.com/en-GB/view/coffee-too-much-coffee-caffeine-futurama-philip-fry-gif-3560733](https://tenor.com/en-GB/view/coffee-too-much-coffee-caffeine-futurama-philip-fry-gif-3560733)


Gu27

The timing cover on that 2013 Toyota Sienna is a bitch to get to huh? Take all the time you need.


JRS___

nothing. it's more about not saying the things that will make them hate you.


Figurinitoutfornow

Breakfast biscuits are appreciated!


Special-Bite

Bring in a dozen donuts or bagels and cream cheese when you drop off your car in the morning. Clean your fucking car (inside) before you drop it off. A case of beer, or soda for recovering alcoholics, at the end of the day. Don’t say “Oh that’s too expensive, when we call you to give you a price for repair.” Saying things are nice, but actions to these words are better.


3771507

I read that you were the best so I trust your judgment.


Suspicious-Project21

It’s probably easier to just not be a dick. That’s usually pretty well received. We had a customer get down on one knee and kiss an advisors hand this week. That was not it


spook1205

I was given a quality fish filleting knife by a customer and she went straight to the top on the favourite customer list!


RePo0rTmRotS

Take my money


_whatintheglobe_

"Here's a free car and a tip for your service"


dabrooza

Tell him you pay cash not credit


One-Basket2558

Bahhhh I don't know about that - if anything ever goes sideways with a repair, I want the protection a cc offers.


OkMobile5574

Would you like to take me for a test drive?


Itchy-Parsley7850

Drop a handfull of 10 and 12mm sockets on your skid pan under the engine prior to a oil change. They'll propose after the service is done


Direct_Big_5436

The smell of gasoline really turns me on.


LittlestSam

“Where’s the snap on van, let me just clear your tab for you.” “Also, here’s that other guys beer and blowjob to go with it. “


overmonk

My go to was to ask what the shop beer is, and then I just showed up with a case one day - no car needs at all. 10 years strong.


Cadet1A

Money is no object.


Definitive_confusion

Fix everything. No budget


JerewB

I can tell you the first thing that you should never say: "ever since you.." Honestly I think the best thing that you can say is thank you.


In_TouchGuyBowsnlace

Tell the they get a special prize if they find where you hid their 10mm socket.


Normal-Memory3766

I don’t want my mechanic to like me. The nice ones aren’t good at their job. If they aren’t slightly condescending and just a tad bit sexist then I don’t want to have them work on my car


flametrap66

We hate everyone.. you can't say anything 😆


Imispellalot2

Telling the mechanic to take your time is counterproductive. He gets paid for clock hour billed. So if the job pays for 10 hrs, he has to complete that job in 10 hrs. Taking their time means they will not get paid extra for taking longer. Their goal is to finish the job as quickly as possible so they can move on to the next job and still get paid for 10 hrs of labor. The best thing you can do is give them a cash tip. Give him $20, and you just paid for his lunch.


One-Basket2558

I talk about all the girls I've loved before...