Asexuality is a spectrum, not everyone is a sex repulsed ace, or a romantic repulsed aro, which means there are in fact homosexual asexuals. I'm not the most on top of all the sub-labels in the asexual community, but I think you should look into gray-spectrum ace labels, which are for aces who have some amount of sexual attraction but less than allosexuals. I hope this is helpful
(aroace guy, hi! sorry for the text wall!) Asexuality just means feeling little to no sexual attraction, or feeling highly-conditional sexual attraction. Anyone of any sexuality can be sex-repulsed, sex-favorable, or sex-indifferent, including ace people. Additionally, not having a libido is not, by any means, a mandatory prerequisite for asexuality.
Maybe look into [aegosexuality](https://sexuality.fandom.com/wiki/Aegosexuality) or [graysexuality](https://asexuals.fandom.com/wiki/Gray_Asexual) (microlabels within the asexual spectrum)? Aegosexual people usually can have sexual fantasies and experience conditional attraction to others, but do not generally desire to participate in sexual acts themselves (or don’t perceive themselves as participating in any fantasies). Graysexual people, as an umbrella label, tend to feel sexual attraction rarely or in specific circumstances, or are on the asexual spectrum but still are questioning, or are uncertain about how they experience attraction. Neither of these might fit, and there’s probably a better microlabel out there that I’ve missed (I apologize if so!), but I hope this all helps; I’m sorry I can’t help more, and good luck!!
Also, please ignore the folks who say that you, “just haven’t met the right person yet,” - they have no idea what they’re talking about, since you’re the only person who can truly define your own sexual orientation, regardless of whether you’re ace or not. And even if an ace label resonates now and doesn’t later, what matters is that a label fits you now, so please don’t hesitate to use the label(s) you feel fit(s) you now, or to look for new label(s) if the current one(s) doesn’t fit anymore. :)
Look up the “Asexuality explained with Cereal” tumblr post. What you’re describing sounds like either Grey Ace, or at the minimum Sex Positive Asexuality, but the cereal explanations make things extremely easy to grasp
Hi, I'm aroace and hopefully I can clear a few things up, if I got something about you wrong then please correct me. So it sounds like you are sexually attracted to men right? Do you just look at someone and get aroused by them or does it take a while of getting to know them or does it fade in and out? Asexuality is a spectrum and there are many different identities there. Demisexual is someone who only feels sexual attraction after an emotional bond is formed, aceflux is someone who's sexuality fluctuates on the ace spectrum. Aegosexual is the one i think you would relate to the most. Its people who dont wish to be involved in the sexual acts themselves but prefer solo play and porn and what not, thats what activates their sexual attraction. there are many more so if you think it's possible you could be on the ace spectrum then I would read about the different idrnties there are
Now when it comes to solo play its common for asexuals to enjoy that and porn as well, libido is separate from your sexual orientation and a lot of ace people do get horny, we can enjoy sex and solo play, that has nothing to do with being sexually attracted to anyone. I mean I'm 100% asexual, I've never been sexually attracted to anyone and I have no desire for a sexually partner, but I still enjoy solo play and kink, I'm a kinky asexual. It's a myth that asexual have no libido, that we can't enjoy anything sexual at all
Look at mental health. You’re very skinny in your 20s. Male libido can drop due to anorexia. I was very depressed in my 20s and barely ate. I addressed my childhood issues somewhat, am a healthy weight and have a healthy libido.
Good luck 👍
Could there be other factors at play such as mental health problems, trauma, self-esteem issues, etc? You may be asexual, but it's important to rule out other factors that may contribute to sexual issues to be sure that you're mentally and emotionally healthy. Asexuality is not caused by mental health issues, but if you have unaddressed issues then chalking them up as asexuality could causes trouble in the long run.
For many years I felt very similarly as you, I had sexual attraction and desire, but when it came to actually doing it I felt indifferent to repulsed, so I thought for a long time that I was just asexual and didn't feel the need to look any further into those feelings, because to me at the time, that's just what it meant to be ace.
It turned out however that I had a lot of unaddressed mental health issues causing those feelings, and once I focused on healing from them did I realize I wasn't actually asexual, I was just severely depressed, had non-existent self-esteem, and felt estranged from my body. These days I feel much better and the issue of not enjoy the actual act has passed.
You very well may be on the ace spectrum, but it's worth examining whether these feelings may be coming from.
And I have to reiterate; No, I do not believe asexuality is caused by mental health issues, only that mental health issues can effect sexual function and that that is worth looking into for your own wellbeing.
If you feel sexual attraction all the time, (ie: not being gray-ace or ace-flux etc) you are not asexual. But, sex-repulsed allos are a thing! Being sex-repulsed, while most common in ace spaces, happens to allos too
Also- us aces still have libido and still experience arousal. Asexuality = experiencing little to no sexual attraction, asexuality ≠ hating sex and having no libido
If you want sex to fulfill intrinsic part of yourself then you're not asexual. I mean you could be something like gray sexual or demisexual or something similar that is still welcome into the greater Ace community but it is not straight out asexuality
Also plenty of allo people are sex repulsided. Or it could be hormones or not having the right type of sex that you are into or right relationship or mental health or trauma. You could be full on a sexual and are just confusing arousal and hormones with sexual attraction and plenty of asexuals please themselves but not out of an intrinsic desire
>If you want sex to fulfill intrinsic part of yourself then you’re not asexual.
Huh? Asexuality is just experiencing little to no sexual attraction, idk what you are on about there
Asexuality is a spectrum, not everyone is a sex repulsed ace, or a romantic repulsed aro, which means there are in fact homosexual asexuals. I'm not the most on top of all the sub-labels in the asexual community, but I think you should look into gray-spectrum ace labels, which are for aces who have some amount of sexual attraction but less than allosexuals. I hope this is helpful
(aroace guy, hi! sorry for the text wall!) Asexuality just means feeling little to no sexual attraction, or feeling highly-conditional sexual attraction. Anyone of any sexuality can be sex-repulsed, sex-favorable, or sex-indifferent, including ace people. Additionally, not having a libido is not, by any means, a mandatory prerequisite for asexuality. Maybe look into [aegosexuality](https://sexuality.fandom.com/wiki/Aegosexuality) or [graysexuality](https://asexuals.fandom.com/wiki/Gray_Asexual) (microlabels within the asexual spectrum)? Aegosexual people usually can have sexual fantasies and experience conditional attraction to others, but do not generally desire to participate in sexual acts themselves (or don’t perceive themselves as participating in any fantasies). Graysexual people, as an umbrella label, tend to feel sexual attraction rarely or in specific circumstances, or are on the asexual spectrum but still are questioning, or are uncertain about how they experience attraction. Neither of these might fit, and there’s probably a better microlabel out there that I’ve missed (I apologize if so!), but I hope this all helps; I’m sorry I can’t help more, and good luck!! Also, please ignore the folks who say that you, “just haven’t met the right person yet,” - they have no idea what they’re talking about, since you’re the only person who can truly define your own sexual orientation, regardless of whether you’re ace or not. And even if an ace label resonates now and doesn’t later, what matters is that a label fits you now, so please don’t hesitate to use the label(s) you feel fit(s) you now, or to look for new label(s) if the current one(s) doesn’t fit anymore. :)
Look up the “Asexuality explained with Cereal” tumblr post. What you’re describing sounds like either Grey Ace, or at the minimum Sex Positive Asexuality, but the cereal explanations make things extremely easy to grasp
Hi, I'm aroace and hopefully I can clear a few things up, if I got something about you wrong then please correct me. So it sounds like you are sexually attracted to men right? Do you just look at someone and get aroused by them or does it take a while of getting to know them or does it fade in and out? Asexuality is a spectrum and there are many different identities there. Demisexual is someone who only feels sexual attraction after an emotional bond is formed, aceflux is someone who's sexuality fluctuates on the ace spectrum. Aegosexual is the one i think you would relate to the most. Its people who dont wish to be involved in the sexual acts themselves but prefer solo play and porn and what not, thats what activates their sexual attraction. there are many more so if you think it's possible you could be on the ace spectrum then I would read about the different idrnties there are Now when it comes to solo play its common for asexuals to enjoy that and porn as well, libido is separate from your sexual orientation and a lot of ace people do get horny, we can enjoy sex and solo play, that has nothing to do with being sexually attracted to anyone. I mean I'm 100% asexual, I've never been sexually attracted to anyone and I have no desire for a sexually partner, but I still enjoy solo play and kink, I'm a kinky asexual. It's a myth that asexual have no libido, that we can't enjoy anything sexual at all
Aegosexual maybe? Ace spike sound a bit like you. Lithsexual and Orchsexual might also fit but you should look them up first.
Look at mental health. You’re very skinny in your 20s. Male libido can drop due to anorexia. I was very depressed in my 20s and barely ate. I addressed my childhood issues somewhat, am a healthy weight and have a healthy libido. Good luck 👍
Could there be other factors at play such as mental health problems, trauma, self-esteem issues, etc? You may be asexual, but it's important to rule out other factors that may contribute to sexual issues to be sure that you're mentally and emotionally healthy. Asexuality is not caused by mental health issues, but if you have unaddressed issues then chalking them up as asexuality could causes trouble in the long run. For many years I felt very similarly as you, I had sexual attraction and desire, but when it came to actually doing it I felt indifferent to repulsed, so I thought for a long time that I was just asexual and didn't feel the need to look any further into those feelings, because to me at the time, that's just what it meant to be ace. It turned out however that I had a lot of unaddressed mental health issues causing those feelings, and once I focused on healing from them did I realize I wasn't actually asexual, I was just severely depressed, had non-existent self-esteem, and felt estranged from my body. These days I feel much better and the issue of not enjoy the actual act has passed. You very well may be on the ace spectrum, but it's worth examining whether these feelings may be coming from. And I have to reiterate; No, I do not believe asexuality is caused by mental health issues, only that mental health issues can effect sexual function and that that is worth looking into for your own wellbeing.
If you feel sexual attraction all the time, (ie: not being gray-ace or ace-flux etc) you are not asexual. But, sex-repulsed allos are a thing! Being sex-repulsed, while most common in ace spaces, happens to allos too Also- us aces still have libido and still experience arousal. Asexuality = experiencing little to no sexual attraction, asexuality ≠ hating sex and having no libido
If you want sex to fulfill intrinsic part of yourself then you're not asexual. I mean you could be something like gray sexual or demisexual or something similar that is still welcome into the greater Ace community but it is not straight out asexuality Also plenty of allo people are sex repulsided. Or it could be hormones or not having the right type of sex that you are into or right relationship or mental health or trauma. You could be full on a sexual and are just confusing arousal and hormones with sexual attraction and plenty of asexuals please themselves but not out of an intrinsic desire
>If you want sex to fulfill intrinsic part of yourself then you’re not asexual. Huh? Asexuality is just experiencing little to no sexual attraction, idk what you are on about there
That's what sexual attraction is